Those are not narcissist! Those are malignant/ psychopathic narcs.

I have great insight on what happens to the children of the scapegoat

That is interesting. I have been trying to figure out why I feel the way I do towards my mother. When I was growing up she was the ‘good enough’ mother. Which meant she was constantly busy, stressed, angry, emotionally absent. But also worked, cooked dinner, kept the house in order while my immature narc father did swanned around feeling important as a minister. My mother knew how to give me just enough attention to shut me up if I was upset but aside from that she preferred to have me occupied with something well out of her busy way. She much preferred my brother who had learnt by then it was a waste of time to express any emotional needs (or any needs) and that emotions were for weak stupid people (not our family who was intelligent and didn’t waste our time on them). This continued until I left home and until I had my own children and suddenly my mother was wanting to be ‘all in’ involved and dedicated, the perfect grandmother. She ensured she came to every significant family event (whether invited or not). When my daughter started school, I was pregnant with my third baby and slow to get out of the car. Instead of waiting for me, my mother took my daughter’s hand and walked her through the school gate for the first time. I recalled the haste and lack of concern my mother had when leaving me at school on my first day, obviously happy to be free of me and able to get on with her day. My children have had a number of health issues and partly as a result I gave up work to stay home to look after them. It was better for my mental health as well but not good for our financial health and my mother has given us money which she was in a position to do partly because she spent all her time working and partly as she was helped out financially by her parents and my fathers parents. I feel grateful for the financial help but I hate the power dynamic that seems to implicitly come with it. It doesn’t feel like an equal mutually respected relationship like she seems to have with my brother who is financially successful. I would liken it to feeling like being love bombed as an adult, in the contrast with how she acted when I was a child. Its like we are some kind of status symbol for her to talk about to her friends and the extended family. I think the difficult part is not only is there no acknowledgement of how emotionally cut off and absent she was as a mother (she once went on holiday for 4 months when I was around 5 leaving us with our father who was incompetent as a parent, although his mother came to stay luckily to cook and look after us luckily as my father would not have coped). But she actually considers herself to have been an amazing parent given the lack of support we had from my father. She did work hard but she certainly saw it as a waste of time trying to spend any time emotionally attuning to us and still gets angry if I express anything other than positive emotion to her now. I hate the farce and lack of authenticity and validation yet sense of obligation I have. I feel as though it drives me insane sometimes.

I literally didnt know npd bpd asd existed but was surrounded by them _ i was scapegoated as a child.

They scapegoat for a serotonin hit ( they in need of a social dominance experince) _ serotonin makes them feel powerful _ only last a while then they need wnother hit _ u can figure out the pattern. Maybe serotonin pill can help psychopaths who abuse the kids? Maybe serotonin patch.

Its the betrayal we feel. We know when people dont make the effort _ and say " love ve u" but its just words_ a model person _ like a 'paper cut out' that chages cloths every 5 minutes.

I did it to myself. They put my little sister in a running race with me ( she had lung issues) and she almost died trying to win against me _ i stopped running and let her win rather than see her die. She's a goldy narcy today _ and runs an educational system

Spotify

Avoiding Life Philip

We come from comunist Eastern Europe Thus turd shrink us a criminal Marxist Yse your mind America Thouse shrinks are domestic criminals stop listening to these drug deskers

OMG! If the people on shows have also experienced incest, I want to hear it. It’s THAT IMPORTANT.

Thank you for dedicating so much time to discussing AVPD it doesn’t get discussed enough.

It’s always harder with kids involved. We’ve been there too.

Thank you. I know for everyone it's something different and it's all a matter of timing, but for me this just cracked something in the impenetrable denial of why I ended up in a relationship with an 'almost' comically severe narcissist. I have to be thankful for that, the severity made staying impossible, even without understanding. However, there is a child involved and that sadness is harder to deal with

This women knows nothing about mental health. Trying to flog her "Scapegoating"' as if she had coined it. Trying to cash in her "Niche"" cause she lacks any talent!!!! Therapy genesis from the Old Testament - IS A HUGE PROBLEM. I've heard this craxy women before. Stop giving her air time inher Old Testament CRAP. You have ZERO talent Glynis

Reading "The Sum of Us" by Heather McGhee is a great way to learn the reason the legal systems are all deliberately flawed and corrupt, and they want you to go crazy and give up. There is a Podcast now too.

Thank you for this show topic. Boy do I wish I stayed after what I have been through after leaving. I had no idea of this concept. I will never tell anyone to "just leave" again, especially disabled people. My post separation abuse came from my family of origin. They were waiting for me to fail. I had no idea. I actually had a successful divorce from my narcissistic ex husband. He realized my family was trying to team up with him against me. He was luckily not willing to take the bait, as they had hated on him during our ten year relationship. The abuse from my family post divorce and disability will never end until they are all dead, I'm afraid. I've found some legal and logistical support. The medical system is pure hell. Maybe I can help others if I ever survive it.

Really take a good look at the first attorney you choose. That said it all, because as victims, we choose Psychopaths. The Women's Resource Center for domestic violence paid my retainer fee for an attorney who felt like my enemy for a year-and-a-half. Two years later, I had found out she was friends with my ex's family the entire time and never disclosed it. I was beaten up and beaten down. I was threatened. I had to start my emails off to the attorney as deer attorney so-and-so. I'm not asking this question to upset you in anyway. It's just something that has been unanswered for now for 5 weeks, and I really like to get to the bottom of this. By the end of the year and a half fighting for just fifty-fifty split, I have lost everything. And I was never granted a divorce, because my marriage license was somehow lost in this little tiny County where my ex and his family have associated law n judiciary friends. I had to die three times just to get into safe housing. I've been begging for extraction well over seven years. This is been abuse upon abuse and betrayal upon betrayal. And doing this alone, is nothing less than being outcasted even further. Thank you for this fantastic interview ladies. I honor both of you and such high favor and respect.

Filing a PFA is about a 20-page document. Filing a cross PFA against false allegations also known as a retaliation order, is extensive and will land you a month in court. Getting a restraining order, is begging a judge, if you're a woman you will be asked about 20 questions. If you're a man begging a judge, you'll get asked one question and if you say you're afraid because the woman is crazy, you'll be granted one immediately. The average district attorney sees 44,000 cases a year. 85% a victim survivors attempt, commit, or are coerced into suicide. 30% are murdered. 11% of 30% women murdered all had a restraining order in place.

Thank you

Awesome Podcast Topic Kwan, love you, Keep it up😘❤️🙏🏽

So much excellent support for the recovery process in this interview. Loved the accuracy of the emotions, techniques and the feelings of the victim. My attraction to narcissists began with my father and it has taken a lifetime to recover. I've discovered the feeling I get when attracted to one, immediately tells me who they are and I am able to deflect their attention. Earlier in the journey, I thought that feeling was love! OMG, it was the antithesis of love! That feeling is now my built in warning system. Thanks for the validation!

👋

Feminist filth

Can you add a link to that song?

One of the best podcasts I've listened to on narcissism.

Very nice 👍

Most videos state abuse starts around 6. I was almost 3, When it started and only stopped when he moved out when I was 6. Then I was neglected and mentally abused by my parents untill 19 and the abused was never addressed. Now 35 I have recreated these relationships because I literally don't know any different and have nothing to compare to.

Lock Trump up Accountability Accountability 🔐🔐🔒🔐 Unfit, Dangerous, Criminal. Kick Trump out of the American People's 🏠🏡🏡🏡 Permanently. Get this walking timebomb criminal out of the people's government.Lock Trump up Accountability Accountability 🔐🔐🔒🔐 Unfit, Dangerous, Criminal. Kick Trump out of the American People's 🏠🏡🏡🏡 Permanently. Get this walking timebomb criminal out of the people's government.

Narcissistic always tell Dried Up Humour Jokes.

The only pandemic is global narcissism - political leaders playing God - creating problems that create fear and then come in with a solution like an experimental drug COVID is certification of vaccination identification- it has been enhanced by the WUHAN lab and fauci and Gates are behind it - they are overt narcissists

Dr Feldman I just bought your book - I’ll buy Andreas next

Excellent show - Andrea I love your eloquence and truth and courage I know what it took thank you

Thank you! This is very informative.

Thank you for this video🌺 I was in a narcissistic marriage 12years. I've been working on myself. I'm learning as to how I can support my son 11 and recognize traits. Praying my son will be okay. But he now also has this burden to carry. With him getting older. He sees for himself.

Narctc parents create anxiety fear depression in adult children due to childhood emotional neglct

Not the Dr Paul Maier I was searching for but good stuff thx

Good Lenten Journey ✝🕯🕊🧎‍♂️🧎‍♀️🙏🚶‍♂️🚶‍♀️

what is the song about house of cards that plays in the beginning? going crazy trying to find it

Not too shabby except seeming to antagonize narcissist people. Sure they can do better to improve, but not like they completely choose to be that way, if read the great book "Anatomy of Loneliness" by Teal Swan, it's self love essentially just not projected quite right. But just telling a narcissist person they're wrong/ an a-hole, etc. instead of just avoiding or compassion, just makes it worse

Can we get grounded by going to our house basment?

Is there any research on narcissistic therapists? I haven’t heard anyone address this unless they sexually abuse the client.

Very fascinating, thanks for sharing this here!

As children we were ridiculed by my mother for laughing, she called it “the glee of insanity”. So yes weird but there is fear in feeling joyous from this.

I wouldn't say autistic people are so authentic, I'm autistic and I used to be very concerned with others thought and I was masking for a lot of years

Amazing how these mental illneses are so prevalent in the XXI century, mainly on the biggest social media. I came here from a video titled "TikTok is a mental illness factory. And we're in an epidemic." by "Sydney Watson". She describes basically the same feigning described here but being broadcasted on TikTok by "content creators". Whether they want likes attention or laughs, self deprecating "content" seems to have risen there.

This was a fantastic podcast episode! Thank you to all - Marc Feldman, Andrea, and the hosts! You’re all amazing and wonderful here. :) I wonder if you have more like this. Anyway, you got yourselves a new subscriber, if nothing else.

Cut my mother out over a year ago. Best thing I ever did I've grown so much. So have the kids.

Thank you so much for this

My grandmother, mother step father and bio father are all narcissistic with some bordering on personality disorder my step dad being one of them, his needs always came before mine in the eyes of my mother now I see why, He would bully me from the age of as young as 7 or 8 calling me names and trying to intimidate me and it would all be swept under the rug so my mother could have peace of mind while I was going through hell, it got physical with my step father on multiple occasions but not a single family member stepped in to help it was only when an ex girlfriend of mines parents saw the marks all over my face and neck that things finally got better as they took me down to the police station to report him. I could go on and on but these videos have really opened my eyes to the fact that this behaviour is not normal and no child should ever feel afraid or like they are a burden in their own home. Thank you for this. I will continue to try to heal from my trauma and abuse.