MAH MAH.. I am looking at the Bars.. I need to see you HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. as I am sitting on the Prison Floor.. and Behind me is the Art Sketch Paper.. in these dark times when I can't be with YOU.. and without Your Presences and Only way for my Heart to get through the days is when I have the Art Sketch paper.. Drawing Picture of YOU and I am just waiting in the silent.. I know that the Prime Minister and Other Council of Noble Men is putting the Case against Me.. saying that it is TREASON.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. My QUEEN.. I know that if I must Die tonight.. if they press the Charge against me.. please let my name be known that I am the One who Loves YOU the Most.. if YOU want to write something about me.. please let it be known that I have always Loved You.. and that you have saw everything what a Man can do when it comes out of Heart when a MAN truly Loves YOU.. and as I would be holding with Both Hands the Art Sketch Paper.. the drawing Picture of YOU and I would be looking at your Beautiful Face.. I would say and whisper.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO.. you are the True QUEEN of my Heart.. my Love.. my Queen.. who I have been loving for a Long TIME.. and I am Not sure where did It all start.. if I can go back when I first saw YOU.. when I took that first glance and How you shook my Heart.. and as I am Looking at the Art Sketch Paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. I would be walking with my Father.. and I would be sitting on the top of the Horse.. and my father pulling the strings and He is smiling walking ahead while the Horse is following and I am sitting on top.. and on the right side is the waters.. the ocean and I would to LOOK at the Sun.. and the Horse stops.. and my Father stops and he turns his Head looking at the SUN.. on the Other side.. the King.. PEH HA is pulling the Horse string.. and I can hear a Big Laughter as the strings of the Horse behind the King.. so many People from the Palace are walking behind the Horse.. the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH when YOU were young sitting on the TOP.. and the KING.. PEH HA Stops.. and the Horse stops.. and my Father turns too look ahead.. the KING who is standing there.. my Father walks faster towards HIM and falls on both Knee.. Head looking to the Floor and I would get Out of the Horse and I would walk faster AND also falls on both knees and Head to the ground.. and I hear the Voice to get UP.. and My father gets UP before the King and I was allowed to lift UP my Head UP and as I would stand UP.. I am standing next to my father.. I see YOU sitting on the TOP of the Horse and YOU turn Your Head.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH turns the Head to Look down and when I saw YOU for the first time.. I don't know what it is.. but My Heart.. I can feel my Heart beating but faster it kept on beating.. and I would fall on both knees.. and my father turns to LOOK down with the King.. and I see you sitting on the TOP of the Horse and YOU look.. I wanted to give you a Flower.. back in the garden is where I can find this ONE flower.. who reminds so much of YOU.. the Most Beautiful Flower to My Queen.. But I am Not sure.. if I pick the Flower from the Garden.. will you receive the Flower that I give that only can comes from my Heart.. what if I give it to YOU but you dismiss it.. and it can cause my Heart to break.. should I take the chance to give you the Flower.. it is a Flower that my Mother gave to my Father.. the Seed and told my Father before she died to plant the seed where she be buried and watch how the Seed will grow and produce into this Flower.. and I remember my Father planting the seeds she gave HIM and by the tree and it grew after a certain time.. I would walk with my father into the Garden.. going UP the Hill top where the Tree is there and the Flower grew there.. that it is her Heart.. when I love someone.. that this Flower can truly transfer and once that Love transfer through the giving of this Flower that Dreams can be made and Dreams of Love can come true.. it is in the Garden but on the TOP.. the Hill top where the Tree stands alone.. there is a bed where the Flowers started to grow from the Seeds that was planted and I wanted to give you this One Special Flower that came from the Seeds of Flowers and I know that it means.. the Flower is the QUEEN of my Heart.. only One Heart that I have and can give to YOU HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. when I first saw YOU at the Ocean.. and How the King.. PEH HA.. He was the One who was walking ahead.. and HE was the One who was pulling on the strings of the Horse.. all the Noble men and generals.. the Prime Ministers.. all the high Officials were standing behind as the KING.. PEH HA was introducing the Next new Ruler to Be.. and How he was walking on bare feet and the High Officials were giving distance as HE.. PEH HA.. the KING wanted to be alone with YOU.. and How he wanted to show YOU that ONE Day.. you are going to take his Place because Other SONS were all behind with the HIGH OFFICIALS of the ROYAL PALACE.. but He has chosen YOU that Day.. I was riding on the top of the Horse.. my Father wanted to tell me Something.. He wanted to share a story to Me and has something very Important message to tell me that day.. On this day.. for the first time as My Father was pulling on the Horse and He was sharing about my grandfather.. which was his father.. that is when YOUR FATHER the KING.. PEH HA comes by himself.. bare feet and walking down alone.. and I believe he was telling YOU a story too and I met you there at the Ocean.. my Father loved the Ocean just like my Grandfather.. and I too love the Ocean waters.. and I am thinking.. Maybe HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. My QUEEN loves the Ocean waters as well.. I remember that day.. the Doctors of the ROYAL Palace came.. your Father's Feet.. PEH HA'S FEET was bleeding walking on the rocky road.. and I saw YOU watching.. but my Heart to saw you for the first Time and I knew.. YOU are going to be My QUEEN.. not just the QUEEN but also the QUEEN of my Heart who I can only Love YOU.. so Please.. I want to show YOU and take YOU to the Garden.. so that when you do go to the garden.. I want to show you that special Flower.. which is located in the Garden.. on the Hill Top of where the Tree still stands.. and I want to give you this Flower.. Now I am thinking of this Flower which I could Not give to YOU Yet.. it has been so long since I was at the Garden and Now.. WHEN I am sitting in this Prison.. and able to think about you More deeply.. this FLOWER.. I am wondering.. is that ONE SPECIAL FLOWER still there.. it is from the Seeds that my Father planted long ago.. but it is the biggest flower that came from many seeds when My Father planted at the bed by the Tree.. I called the Flower My QUEEN.. which means the Most Beautiful Flower stands Out from the rest because the other Flowers are much more smaller.. as I am Looking at the Art Sketch paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. is it too Late to Know about this Flower.. am I just too Late to give you this Flower.. I want to give this Flower because I remember what my Father told ME because it came from my Dying Mother when she gave the seeds of flowers to my Father before she died.. to give the Flower when it grows bigger and when I grow older.. when I meet someone WHO I love the Most and WHO I believe is the One I call my QUEEN of my Heart.. the ONE WHO I been loving.. to plant it and let the seeds to grow so that when I find the ONE WHO I LOVE.. I can give you the Flower to tell YOU.. it has taken me so Long to remember.. because I have lost the focus of this Flower for many long years.. I just want to go back to the Garden to see that ONE SPECIAL FLOWER.. before I die here in the Palace.. I want to make One true wish before I go to tell YOU my QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. HOW much I love YOU and that I should of given you this Flower much sooner.. then I believe by now.. something could of happened right.. but I don't want it to be Never either.. just to take this ONCE last chance.. to tell YOU that what I heard and how it was passed down to me by my Mother.. if she is right.. I believe that Dreams of Love can be made and Dreams can come true because I do believe in this Love that it is very special.. just like YOU HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. that YOU are so Special to Me.. has been all this time and still YOU are.. age to age do Not matter because as long as it is My Heart who loves YOU.. I know that If it means to happen.. something to happen.. in that Garden.. on the HILL TOP where the Tree stands.. there is a bed of Roses there.. and when YOU LOOK at the Bed of Flowers.. YOU WILL find One special Flower that stands OUT alone.. that Flower.. her name is YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. as I am given this Paper with the Ink.. asking the guard by the Prison Door.. gives me my request and I am sitting down.. writing with the Ink as it dips.. on this Paper I am writing the Instructions and telling YOU HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. my QUEEN.. if I die here in Prison.. I know that I won't be able to tell YOU.. but with this Message I am writing.. YOU can go there to see it for yourself to see if it is true.. that ONE FLOWER belongs to YOU.. that it is YOURS.. I have been waiting for that Flower to be KNOWN to you but it has taken me so long to tell you this.. I believe Life gives YOU a story which so much things are happening that sometimes YOU DO forget to TELL YOU what is the Most Important.. as I am Looking at the Art Sketch Paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. I really wanted to go with YOU.. it does Not matter if I die here in the Prison because at least in my life time I get the chance to tell YOU many times How much I love YOU.. watching you grow over time.. NOW you are the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and HOW you have

MAH MAH.. Succeeded after your Father.. PEH HA.. and I am just thinking back that HOW your FATHER.. PEH HA knew all this TIME.. He had to pass for the NEXT TO SUCCEED after HIM.. but YOUR FATHER.. PEH HA already Knew that YOU.. his DAUGHTER will become the QUEEN.. will conqueror after HE passes On and I am just thinking about HOW he just knew.. the DAY I meet you for the first time.. I was riding on the Back TOP of the Horse.. and How YOU were too riding on the back top of the Horse.. many servants and High Officials who works for the palace all came Out that day.. it was so amazing to watch Many of the Higher UP Officials.. Just standing.. giving the distance where the Father.. PEH HA.. the King wanted to spend Time alone with YOU that day.. and His FEET bleed through that WALK but he kept on walking.. and showing YOU how much HE loves to spend the TIME with YOU.. I saw that when I was sitting on back top of the Horse.. PEH HA.. the KING was smiling all the way through the walk.. that day when I lifted UP and stood before YOU on both feet.. I just knew YOU are the One.. when I saw YOUR FATHER.. smiling and LOOKING at YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. that I heard him say looking at YOU.. the NEXT in LINE.. the One to conqueror after Me.. and I looked at my father and HE smiles looking at YOU and it knocked me to both Knee to go down.. two knees down.. Head looks on the floor.. my arms stretch Out before YOU.. I remember I heard the WORD from the King.. PEH HA when I did that to YOU before Me.. Your FATHER said LOOKING at YOU.. I will help protect this Nation.. that I will help to fulfill to build this Nation to help YOU and I hear the both Fathers smiling looking at Both of Us.. and my Heart.. I felt It being Alive.. I felt It come alive because I knew it is going to be YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. who I will Love you forever.. even in the Prison I can die here.. even in the battlefield of war.. I can die there too.. where ever you place me.. I will FIGHT to protect and to help build.. but to defend if I needs to just to protect YOU and just to Love YOU forever.. Please HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. Just give me a Chance so that I can prove to YOU How much I love YOU.. Only YOU can find OUT if you can give me this CHANCE.. I will love you where NO MAN can ever love you like the way I love YOU.. Please give me the Chance to keep on loving YOU.. if YOU DO MY QUEEN.. even after I am gone you will KNOW and YOU will believe that a REAL MAN who loves YOU can really really truly Love YOU no Other way I can.. I just wanted to say to YOU.. that I love YOU.. I see YOU sitting on the King's Throne Chair.. and YOU stand UP.. pointing the Sword at the 1st top General and in the Outer court.. behind is a Place where YOU spar.. and I am looking at YOU.. Your Sword Points at me.. and I am wondering what does this Means.. and I turn to Look at YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. My QUEEN.. and I would go down on two Knees.. My arms stretch forward.. and My Head LOOKING at the Ground.. YOU point the King's Sword at Me giving me the Permission to speak.. My QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. what does this Means.. WHY are you pointing the Sword to Me and the 1st Top general.. and there is the Messenger in the Back.. and I see YOU pointing your Sword at the Message at the back to Speak.. and the Messenger who has the scroll unfolds and shares about what is Going On.. the Enemies of the War is drawing Near and the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH wants me to challenge to Fight the 1st Top General.. and WHO WINS will take that Seat.. and I turn to Face YOU.. and my Head looks down to the Ground.. Your Sword Points at me to speak and I would say.. HOW can I fight the Best.. I am truly UNWORTHY to fight the TOP GENERAL.. I have NO training of Wars in combat.. this General wins battles at Wars and has helped this Nation.. I have heard that HE can KILL many armies with the Sword.. and I am Not much of that experienced of wars.. ONLY thing that I am good at right now is Loving YOU as My QUEEN.. the QUEEN of my Heart.. and I see YOU still pointing that sword and Pointing that Sword back to the TOP.. the 1st General.. and I would hear.. the Seven friends of Mine all comes behind Me.. two knees on the ground.. arms stretch forward and Heads looks to the Ground.. Please.. I can't fight the first.. the TOP General.. and I see YOUR sword still Pointing.. and It seems like the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH is Not having it at all.. and I see you stepping down the Steps to the Ground.. and the Sword on my Neck.. and I would say.. if you need to Cut me.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. Please do so.. it is better for me to DIE by that sword.. I rather Die by your Sword because the Sword belongs to the ONE WHO I Love the Most.. if YOU would LIKE to end my Life right here.. Please so it Fast and Quick MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and I would lift UP my head and close Both eyes.. and I wanted to see you strike my down with the edge of the Sword.. I be the Most Happiest to even die by that sword because YOU KNOW that I am dead by the ONE WHO I love the Most.. I would watch the 2nd Top General and He comes behind the Seven friends of mine and two knees to the Ground.. arms stretch forward and Head looking to the ground with the Seven Generals who walks with HIM.. they all goes.. two knees hit the Ground.. arms stretch forwards and Heads all LOOK to the Ground and shouts together.. MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. SHOW MERCY.. SHOW MERCY ON US.. strike all of US together.. and I am thinking.. what is happening.. and I open both eyes.. and I see YOU back Off and I just can't believe what I am here.. MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. YOUR sword is close to My neck.. and It is ready to take my BLOOD.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MY QUEEN.. please strike Me down Now.. I am ready to Die.. ready to die by your Sword but before YOU strike me with that Sword.. remember HOW MUCH I Love YOU.. I don't care any More.. NOW the 1st general.. the Top best walks UP and He kicks Me on the chest.. without getting the permission from YOU the QUEEN.. and It makes me so Made for NOT HONORING who YOU are.. and HOW rude is that to do it without the CONSENT of the QUEEN.. YOU are Not the Princess any More.. but the One TRUE RULER NOW and I fall on the ground.. and I see YOU angry at the situation.. as I am laying on the Ground.. I would get UP from the GROUND.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. because of WHAT this MAN has done without your WORD.. without your CONSENT.. without your PERMISSION I will take this Challenge.. and I get UP.. Now the Men would make a Big circle around and He walks to the Back where the sparring ground takes Place.. and without.. kicking me in front of YOU when He did Not ask for the Permission when YOU are standing there against my word.. I don't like that at ALL.. so I would walk to the Sparring Ground and the 1st TOP GENERAL stands there with the Sword.. and I am just.. How can he do this when YOU are speaking with me.. and did NOT even ask the permission or have the Word consent and I would pull the Sword Out of the sheath and I would LOOK at this General.. and I see you walking back UP the steps and YOU stand.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and I see you POINTING the KING'S sword and YOU swing that sword to Fight.. and I look at Him and I just run UP with the Sword in my Hand.. HOW dare YOU to act rudely in front of the QUEEN.. Our QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. Show some respect by Honoring and I would jump UP AND swing the Sword in my hand and the 1st General counter Blocks with his Sword and the Blades hit each Other and my two feet lands on the ground and I swing the Sword side way and Would JUMP UP doing the back Kick and I would kick HIS face with a round HOUSE kick.. the 1st General falls to the ground.. and I turn to LOOK at YOU MY QUEEN.. I will Not lose for YOU.. I know that the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH has chosen this Fight with a Purpose in the Mind.. I know that there is a reason why YOU have chosen us to do this.. BUT I just do Not like to show anything.. But just to remain close to YOU.. to just to Love YOU by your side.. I hate to Fight but if it is needed I MUST defend it for YOU HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MAH MAH.. and the 1st General gets UP holding the Sword and HE swings the sword left right left.. right left right at Me as I am going back countering Blocking the Sword.. hearing the Blades Hitting.. IF I lose today My QUEEN.. if I lose I know that I must die.. just the way it Goes But I just can't Die.. I need more years so that I can love you More.. I just got started to Love YOU MORE.. I can't just die like this right.. I need More years to see HOW FAR I can love you so that IT can Out grow from NOW.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MAH MAH.. MY QUEEN and I would grab the Sword Tight and I would Jump UP forward and I would start to swing back at the 1st TOP General.. and the Blades Keeps ON hitting each Other.. and I would side KICK and then move forward with the Back KICK and able to HIT him in the chest.. and I would Jump UP and do the SIDE kick and strike him on the chest again.. at least One thing that I have fully grown to Do in my Heart.. TO LOVE you when YOU were the Little princess.. I started to Love you since you were so YOUNG.. and I always dreamed of Keep on loving YOU till the End.. Now YOU are my QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. my QUEEN and I still Love you as strong as I did when I was YOUNG.. this never changed.. My Heart of loving YOU have always remained faithful because NOW I KNOW how much I love you.. the 1st General looks at me.. hearing me speaking as I would

MAH MAH.. Turn too LOOK at YOU.. he just freezes watching me.. and knowing that I have loved YOU for such a Long time and I turn my Head to face Him and I would look at the 1st General.. the TOP Warrior and I would say.. if you know what a Love Is.. it does NOT matter How many people YOU have killed on the battle field if YOU do NOT even know what it means to Love a WOMAN.. it does NOT matter if it is the QUEEN.. I know that I must be punished.. and I will die for the crimes.. if the Law says I can't Love the QUEEN and I am going against the law.. I will stand in the court and will be trialed for the case.. If I should be charged to Die.. I am ready to DIE for the Heart of My QUEEN.. if I am a dead Man walking.. at least I had the once in a Life to LOVE.. to LOVE YOU my QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. if people in the court wants to punish me and this is a Crime to Love YOU.. I am standing and I know I am ready.. I have take so Many years to Love YOU.. and if I die today.. Please Bury Me with my parents.. and I would look at the 1st General and I would run UP and I jump UP and swing the Sword at HIM the Swords HITS.. the blades Hits and His sword falls to the Ground.. and the 1st General.. his two knees goes down and I put the sword on his Neck.. and I can hear the cheers of the Military troops shouting Out and I turn my Head to look at YOU.. and I see that YOU have pointed your Sword NOT TO KILL him.. your head telling me NOT TO strike Him and I raise UP the sword into the Air.. and I would shout.. and I turn around.. TWO KNEES hit the ground.. dropping the sword to the ground.. my arms stretch forward and Head looks to the ground.. and I am crying.. because YOU are standing there.. the Messenger behind is promoting me to be the 1st top General.. and I am just weeping and mourning in Joy.. and I see your Sword.. pointing at me.. and knowing that you want me to speak.. But my Words.. it is because the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH believes in me.. it is because YOU have given me a chance.. how can I come this Far.. MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MY QUEEN.. YOU even gave me this Permission to speak and to tell YOU about what it means to Love YOU.. even this is the Once in a LIFE time chance you give me.. I am suppose to be punished.. either be stoned to death.. die by the sword or hanged by the ropes.. YOU gave me the chance to share HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU.. I can be arrested and be thrown into prison and also it can be a treason for the Nation.. and I know that without Your consent.. without YOUR PERMISSION.. how can I dare to open my Heart to share this Heart of MINE to YOU.. I know that if the law stated.. a LOW BORN like myself cannot LOOK at the ROYAL BLOOD LINE because it means treason.. I am a traitor of because I was born from the Lowest Class.. I am the son of a SLAVE MAN.. BUT to give me a Chance to walk into the training Ground.. and I had NO learning.. but only skills I was given was from the Old Man.. the teacher and also from my Father.. who gave me what they know but Nothing More.. when YOU LOOK at the birth right.. I am NOT suppose to be here.. and It is because when YOU saw me.. with the Official seal.. you could of still reject me because of the back ground of where I came From.. many Noble YOUNG MEN were only allowed to come into the training Camp and the ground into the Royal Palace.. LOOK at the chances of How much the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH gave me.. even this was a Once in a life time.. without your Permission.. without your consent of the Word How can I even challenge the 1st Top General.. it is IMPOSSIBLE.. but YOU have allowed and granted a WISH but I am NOT even allowed to be here.. NOT even as a PALACE GUARD.. I cried and Cried when YOU looked at the Official seal and YOU LOOKED at me and gave me the Permission to come into the Training ground.. when I saw YOU and How you looked at the Guard who was by the back gates which IT lead to the training ground.. I just could NOT believe because I was waiting for many days.. MANY people had to go home and were NOT ALLOWED.. but when YOU saw me.. YOU looked at me and told me I can come IN.. I cried that NIGHT.. because I needed only ONE CHANCE.. just a ONE SHOT and started to Love YOU because why would you even care about this Low Born.. a SON who was born to a SLAVE MAN.. why would you even give me this kind of chance.. and I would cry looking UP at the MOON.. that just for this ONE CHANCE in a LIFE TIME.. I will never disappoint YOU but show YOU what a REAL MAN.. who is from the most lowest Place can DO.. NOW.. YOU are the QUEEN of the Nation.. in the highest position taking on the highest chair.. and MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MY QUEEN.. YOU have given me the chance to fight.. just to raise me UP to the 1st TOP general.. and I would be looking at the Ground with my tears falling down.. giving me dreams to dream BIG.. How can a MAN dream like this without YOU giving me this kind of permission.. this kind of chance to be here.. MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MY QUEEN.. I wanted to thank YOU so Much for believing in Me.. Not just the miracle of life.. but even How much I love YOU.. I never stopped dreaming but kept on dreaming that Dreams can come true as long as YOU love.. I have never stopped loving YOU still.. this is the main reason why I am so driven and so determine.. so that YOU can see the Heart of MINE that I still LOVE YOU.. that watching YOU taking your Father's Place.. which HE once ruled as the KING.. NOW you are ruling in his Place as the HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and I would see the Seven friends of MINE.. they come behind me.. two knees goes to the FLOOR.. arms stretch forward and HEADS all look at the Floor.. the 2nd Top General and even the 1st top General with their generals all.. two knees Hit the floor.. arms all stretch forwards and Heads all look on the ground and tears of these Men weeping before YOU showing HOW much YOU mean to Us.. as the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH MANSAE!! and My hand grabs the Sword and I raise it UP to the Air and SHOUT LOUD and Clear.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MANSAE!! the voices of the Men behind me all raises UP.. HOORAY to My QUEEN.. MANSAE TO HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. HOORAY TO MY QUEEN.. YOU are the true QUEEN of MY HEART and shouts so LOUD it shakes the ground together.. MANSAE to my QUEEN.. HOORAY TO HWANG WOO MAH MAH and we all cry together in tears.. as I would look at YOU sitting on the THRONE.. the King's Chair as YOU raise UP the King's Sword in the Air and tears falls the eyes and tears falls from the sky.. IT IS raining in joy in tears because YOU are the ONE TRUE QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. My QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH..I am thinking about the Meeting Board.. and watching the Moon that has come UP before me.. the Black smiths are all Hitting the swords with a Stone Hammer and I am waiting for My sword to be more sharpen and More stronger.. as the Master of the Black Smith is inside the place where He is at work.. and with the Seven Friends of Mine standing at the back of the training Ground.. waiting for the Swords.. and the 2nd Top rank General with the seven Generals are all with Me as they are too waiting for their Swords as many Black Smiths are using the Stone Hammers.. I can hear the hammers hitting Hard on the Blades of the swords as I am waiting for the Next Great War that is coming.. as I cannot believe that the 2nd top rank General has joined me as friends.. I have turned to LOOK up at the Moon and I am thinking of YOU.. the Queen.. who has approved the United Hands to work together.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. you know that It has been since Long.. I have been loving YOU.. and as I am Looking UP at the Moon.. I just can't stop with a big Smile.. and I would think Back.. when I saw YOU HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. My QUEEN.. My Father would be pulling the horse.. and I would be sitting on the TOP of the Horse.. Looking at the Art Sketch paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. I would be begging my Father.. Just to take me Once to see YOU.. and I would be looking at the Art Sketch paper.. my arms around the Drawing Picture of YOU.. I would Not eat.. I would Not sleep.. but in the Little ROOM.. after the Garden was restored and was Build UP.. My Father would take a LOOK at me.. finally I would collapse and Fell into a Deep Sleep.. and I did Not wake UP for three days and slept.. I remember my Father would be by my side.. he knew if He did Not take me to see YOU.. I might end UP dead Like my Mother.. when I woke UP finally.. my Father in tears looks at Me.. almost lost me there.. and told me that He was going to see YOU.. I just could not stop.. but My Heart kept on beating Louder and Louder as I grew to Love YOU.. Looking at the Art Sketch Paper.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. I don't know why but I just can't stop.. my Heart just can't stop Loving YOU.. Please tell me why.. what have you done to Me.. to My Heart.. and My Father.. with the Horse.. He carried Me and Put on the Back of the Horse.. I am thinking.. am I dreaming.. please don't wake Me UP.. if I am dreaming.. if I shall Never wake UP in the Dream.. Please.. I just don't want to get UP.. as My Father would be pulling on the ropes of the Horse and I am sitting on the TOP of the Horse.. I remember my Father asking me.. WHY do I love the QUEEN so Much.. WHY do I love HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. what Makes you so Special that even I could Not eat for many days.. and even went into a deep coma for few days and been begging my Father for a long time that I must go to see YOU.. and what if I get caught by the Law.. which a servant Boy cannot Love

MAH MAH.. Royal BLOOD LINE.. that I can be put into death.. it can cost my own Life.. isn't my Life more precious than to Love and I would be sitting on the Top of the Horse as my Father would be asking me these things.. I would say.. I only live Once.. and I will just die if it means to Die.. but to Love is just Once in a Life time.. I can't just love anyone.. must be because I know that I have a BIG HEART.. even though I may be so small.. may be nothing.. has NO NAME.. be a slave Boy.. to LOVE is to love the QUEEN.. if my Heart can only love the QUEEN and NO ONE else and even it means my Life is on the Line.. I don't care what happens to Me.. even I went into Coma.. and does Not that tell YOU enough.. that I can only Love Once and when I love.. I want to love so Big that It be impossible and for Other MEN to say.. that is HOW a Real MAN should Love.. to Love His ONE TRUE QUEEN.. and My Father stops.. and He turns to LOOK back at me.. and he smiles.. but pauses because my Grandfather was close to the King.. which is Your Father.. PEH HA who just passed away.. Must mean something there.. He was the TOP COMMANDER.. to the Highest.. the Chief Commander He was is what my Father would say.. Must be something that I am connected to HIM because My Father never dreamed anything but just to be a Head of the servant.. and I am nothing like my Father.. I want to love My QUEEN.. I want to love my HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and when I put my mind and Heart into something that means something Real and BIG.. I will Never give UP.. until my QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH sees me and believes that I may be so small what Others may be thinking.. but My Heart.. my Dreams and VISIONS are much more greater and in a SUCH HIGHER PLACE.. and My Father looks at me.. and asks.. what if I die because of this.. am I not afraid.. am I not scared and I would tell him.. if I was afraid or too scared.. I would never tried it in the first Place.. I would of never started something that I just could not finished.. I believe in Love.. and My Heart is very BIG even though I am a small person.. I am so small but my Heart and my Vision.. my Dreams of.. I will never stop until I know that my QUEEN.. which is YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH knows it the best in your Heart.. I don't care what anyone says.. but It has never stopped me to come this very far and still I have so much more to go.. and my Father laughs Out Loud and He pulls on the strings of the Horse and He begins to walk as he pulls the strings of the Horse. I am siting on the Back of the Horse.. Looking at the Art Sketch Paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. I see the MOON appear before me.. I see the twinkles of the stars across the Sky and I am smiling as I am looking at the Art sketch Paper.. the drawing picture of YOU and I would say.. MY QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. I am coming to YOU.. I will see you soon.. it takes few days to arrive to the Palace and My Father shows the Card that HE is the Head of the Servant.. the Guards by the gate opens.. and He walks while pulling on the Strings of the Horse and He goes to the training Ground.. I am looking from a distance.. and I see you standing there.. the Chief Generals with the Commanders.. even the Chief Commander is there watching YOU Practice.. I am seeing YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. as my Father keeps on walking ahead pulling on the strings of the Horse and gets closer and closer.. and He stops.. bows HIS Head to you.. and I see you Looking UP.. I am sitting on the top of the Horse.. in my hands is the Art Sketch Paper.. the drawing picture of YOU.. when I see YOU holding the Bow.. in one hand.. the Other is the Arrow.. My Heart.. WHY does it keep on beating.. My Heart.. looking at you closer.. I can't believe that I am seeing YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. it has been a long time.. after YOU came to rebuild the garden.. few months has gone by.. maybe it could been years.. I really missed YOU.. I wish that I could tell YOU this.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. that I could not sleep for days.. I started Not to eat.. missing YOU has been so Hard lately.. and I remember one early Morning.. after I would beg my father.. asking him to take me to YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and my father would Not listen.. telling me NO.. that I should never Love YOU.. I just could not handle this Pain of missing YOU.. I started to starve myself to death.. maybe when I am dead and gone.. he can finally see how much I loved YOU.. anyways I just could Not live with this Pain of keep on missing YOU.. my Heart kept on aching and breaking.. I would sit in the Little ROOM.. I even asked my Father again because I wanted to say something to My QUEEN.. to my HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. I had NO little ROOM.. I had No shelter to put over my Head.. I had to sleep outside or at the friend's house.. felt like a Homeless Poor Boy.. but now I had a Little ROOM that I can put my Head over.. can sleep.. and I would hear my father telling me NO NO NO.. it is just too dangerous for me to get close to YOU.. and he did not want to see his son dying before his eyes but I am already dying.. I feel like I am going to die if I don't see YOU HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. My QUEEN.. and One early Morning.. I would had two full buckets of water walking back to the Home.. and I fell on the ground.. some one saw me laying on the road and knew who I was.. knew my father and called him to get me.. the doctor looks at me while I was in the coma.. because I did Not sleep for days and did not bother to eat for few days either.. I just did Not want to live any more.. missing YOU drives me crazy.. it really kills me instead and the doctor asks my father.. do I love any one.. because the doctor knew the cause of this Pain.. this suffering came because my Heart was aching inside.. of course my father did Not say WHO I loved or was loving.. but knew this is because of YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. My QUEEN.. it is because I never stopped loving YOU since the day I first saw YOU.. ever since I met you at the Garden.. and How you came to visit and you heard about this Garden.. the first time I saw YOU.. you were sitting On the TOP of the Horse.. but had a large gathering of people surrounded you.. I came here sitting on the Top of the Horse.. only One person who brought me over is my Father.. who serves YOU as the Head servant.. I know that I have put my father through many pains.. but I am suffering too.. for loving YOU I had to cross many rivers.. looking at many oceans.. through the travel of the feet.. even getting this Horse Back ride.. but My father knows now that I love you just too much that he does Not want me to give UP.. my father told me when the doctor came to see me.. He told me because my Heart was suffering.. in so much pain of missing YOU.. as I would look at you holding the Bow in your hand.. the Other is the arrow.. and YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH would turn the head looking at the Target.. I don't know why I am here.. but I wanted to see YOU.. I missed YOU so Much my QUEEN.. it took many many days to come here.. and did Not eat much coming.. putting my father through so much pain.. of course I feel so bad but.. I knew If I can't see YOU.. I rather die.. I made that choice to die.. when My Father said NO.. and kept on telling me NO.. I could Not see YOU.. My QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. I can't see YOU.. I made a CHOICE that I am going to end my Life.. I just could not eat.. I would be looking at the Art Sketch Paper.. the drawing Picture of YOU.. I could not sleep.. this pain inside.. this Pain in my Heart.. this Ache kept on coming UP to me because I wanted to see YOU.. I wanted to get close to YOU but How.. I knew if I only begged.. my father would say No.. if I die.. then He will know that I love YOU.. that is when I knew.. I really loved YOU this much that NOW I am here on the back of this HORSE with him.. as I would watch YOU looking at the Target on the training Ground.. it was at the back of it.. the Black smiths are behind the generals and commanders.. behind the Chief Commander.. and I am looking at YOU.. as YOU would PULL back the strings of the Bow with the back of the arrow and YOU would aim and hand releases.. I see the arrow goes fly and It hits right on the Red Dot.. the Guard by the Target stands and waves the White Flag.. shouting Out BULLS EYE.. and I would look at YOU.. even though YOU are my QUEEN.. you are also trained to be a fighter.. I would hear the Chief Commander shouting Out Loud and Clear.. MANSAE.. HOORAY to my QUEEN.. MANSAE.. HOORAY to HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. all of the military soldiers would shout Out.. MANSAE.. HOORAY to the QUEEN.. MANSAE to HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. YOU are wondering why do I love YOU so Much.. it has nothing to do with Me.. but it is because YOU are my True QUEEN.. because I know that YOU are the real HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and there is NO ONE who can take your place in my Heart but YOU.. I knew when I first saw YOU.. it came out of you being a real Princess.. CONG JU NIM.. and How you flourish to become the CROWN PRINCESS.. then when I saw the poor People.. people from the Garden who came.. from far distances.. long distances they have traveled to the Palace.. just to see you and always came before the King.. PEH HA.. asking Your Father for YOU to be the Next Ruler in Line.. they have come from such a far long place.. just to talk to the King.. that the People.. they wanted YOU to take HIS PLACE as the RULER.. when I saw That.. before even this would ever happened.. I knew when you came to the Garden and to rebuild the Garden into New Homes for the People.. I wanted to join and be a Part of.. serving and protecting the Nation YOU are going to build for the future.. I knew YOU were chosen to be the QUEEN.. MY HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. the real

MAH MAH.. TRUE QUEEN..I am looking at the Sun rising.. and I am standing next to YOU.. MAH MAH.. why are you crying.. and I am looking at you holding the Bow and the Arrows as you are pulling out to Shoot and YOU stop.. dropping the arrows on the ground.. I have never seen you in tears.. what is Matter with YOU MAH MAH.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. and I am watching the New Recruits Men coming Out of the tents.. My Heart is breaking as I am watching you In full of tears.. and I hear.. the Queen.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. Your Mother is walking.. the servants and the Maid servants.. the men Servants who are attending her are all coming.. and the Queen drops on the ground.. and has a Letter in the hand.. and as I am looking.. this must be very serious case.. I feel like there is a great change about to come its place.. I had the Dream last Night about.. and when I look at your Mother the Queen.. and I see you just crying.. and I see you telling me to get the Letter in your Mother's Hand.. so I go over.. and grab the Letter out of her Hand.. the Six Princes also are coming with the Prime Minister.. the 12 Noble men comes.. and in my hand is the Letter and I would Unfold.. I would be reading this Letter and I am Not sure why I have to read this.. I am Not even the Messenger for the KING.. PEH HA.. but YOU.. CROWN PRINCESS is telling me that I could.. I just can't believe it.. Your Father.. His Official stamp Seal.. is giving UP his Position to Rule.. the King.. PEH HA does Not want to rule any More and has passed the Seat and as I am reading it a loud where all the Great Powerful Men and Leaders.. the Official has gathered before Me.. and I am also watching the Poor People.. the Ones WHO all came from the Garden.. mostly Homeless people.. and they are all standing hearing the Letter as I am reading before you.. I would fall on my two Knees.. and it states that the King is passing his throne to YOU.. the CROWN PRINCESS shall NOT be PRINCESS any More but to be CROWNED to be the QUEEN KING.. the Highest seat ever to be taken as the RULER and I would be shouting Out.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and I would turn to YOU.. and my hands let goes the Letter.. and I am Looking UP.. my two eyes filled with Tears.. just like my Dreams I had last night.. I never knew that It would happen this Fast.. but WHY so fast.. and I would hear.. all of the People great and small.. they all fall on their two knees.. lowering the Bodies to touch to the ground and say.. To the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. YOU are the new RULER for this Nation.. and I am thinking.. what is going to happen to your Mother.. is she Not the QUEEN and I am LOOKING at your Mother.. she also lowers and her head touches to the ground.. But that is YOUR MOTHER.. and I look.. Your MOTHER pulls the crown Off her Head.. the Messenger Comes with the King's Crown and it unites together as ONE BIGGEST crown.. and GOSH.. my Heart just keeps on beating fast.. the Messenger holding the Biggest Crown and He is walking with tears in his Eyes and I am looking.. all the people.. faces to the ground.. and the Seven of my friends comes out of the tent and they are all looking.. the Biggest Crown goes On top of your Head as the QUEEN of the Nation.. and they all fall on two knees.. heads touching the Ground as YOU are Pronounce to be the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH MANSAE.. I would hear the Little Boys.. all raising UP their hands.. Little Girls too.. raising UP their arms and Hands.. MANSAE to the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and I would hear all of the voices shout OUT.. MANSAE.. HOORAY to the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MANSAE.. and all of the heads are touching the Ground.. I am LOOKING at the ground.. Just could not help the celebration.. that You have become the true new RULER.. I have never stopped Loved YOU.. but kept on loving YOU till I get to see this and hear this.. I never imagined even the Poor people WHO I grew UP with me.. they are together all in ONE watching this Happening.. witnessing something that just can't happen but did Happen going down in the History of what it means to become a TRUE RULER.. there is Another Messenger on the TOP of and he blows the trumpet and it is Loud.. I am wondering.. this sound of the trumpet does not sound good.. it means someone in the royal family just died.. and NO.. and every one starts to Cry.. and I am thinking.. is it PEH HA!.. is it your Father the King who just died and the Messenger shouts Out who is on the top of the palace wall.. the KING.. PEH HA just died.. and everyone starts to Mourn as I am hearing this News.. and I see you just crying Loud and loud for Your Father.. and My Heart.. I know what it means to have a Broken Heart.. and I just can't say a word to YOU.. but.. I know that YOUR Father truly loved YOU.. and YOU would cry loud and it grew louder as YOU kept on mourning for me.. it makes me cry more as I am watching YOU cry for your Father.. the King.. but why is my Heart breaking it more.. and I would think about How he promised that the King is going to be fair when He finds the Successor.. Not because He loved YOU more or Less but to rule is the Most difficult seat to be In.. Only the Strongest and the Wisest can take His place and can rule.. giving all of the six Sons too a chance to prove that they can be on the spot.. but.. YOU are the One chosen.. the Little One.. youngest from the men but as the daughter Only.. and I would just mourn because I remember YOU would be sharing about this One point.. I remember when YOU became the CROWN PRINCESS.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. YOU told me One night about How your Father wanted to give it all fair to His Blood Lines.. but Only ONE can be seated in the Highest seat.. and it is Not that He loved YOU so much.. He saw the People.. He heard about what YOU have done even for the smallest.. the poorest people.. and I know and believe YOUR father believed that the people who was at the garden all came to support YOU.. I remember.. the People from the garden came to me.. and asking me where the King Stayed.. His Chamber.. I would lead the People of the garden to the King's Chamber.. the Servant for the King shares the Message.. and the King.. PEH HA comes and He would be seated on the Outer courts.. I was there.. by the gates just standing to guard the Post.. the Parents of the Children falls on their Knees before the King.. and they shared about what YOU have done when YOU were Young.. the Crown Princess.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. How much you cared and shared the Love for the People.. and they would cry before the King.. PEH HA.. to make YOU the RULER.. that they will serve YOU as servants of the QUEEN.. to Make you the Next to RULE and would be begging the KING.. PEH HA.. never letting the King go until your Father the KING made and keep the Promise to make YOU the RULER for this NATION.. as I would watch the People of the Poor crying Out in a Loud voice.. they have come and travelled long ways away from the Garden just to tell this TO your Father.. the King.. that the People of the Garden will give UP their CHILDREN for the King's services.. I saw Little Boys and girls.. and they would come forward and fall before the KING.. PEH HA.. to Let YOU.. CROWN PRINCESS.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH to rule over them.. as I would watch by the gates of the door.. the Little girls and Boys would fall begging and they started to cry.. how the CROWN PRINCESS.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH saved their parents Lived when NO ONE else cared if they lived or NOT.. that because of the Parents able to stand and live through it.. NOW they are here.. the Little children has come to help the CROWN PRINCESS and I would stand there crying.. watching.. the Guards had to push the Little Boys trying to go cling to the King's leg.. I just could not believe what I be seeing.. just my Heart.. My Heart as I am beating with my hand.. and I would fall on two knees and I started to cry with the Little CHILDREN.. and I would think about my own situation.. the Chance that the CROWN PRINCESS.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH gave me.. I am here Now.. I was at the garden too.. I am looking at the Little children.. they are crying.. heads on the ground to the King because of what YOU have done.. even I was there.. I was there too at the Garden as the Little Boy.. these Parents many that I know has grown UP.. but they too were once like Me little BOYS and Little Girls in the garden and It broke me Down because I was reminded.. It was hard living in the garden as being broke and Poor.. had NO chance.. NO ONE did care about Us.. I started to Hit my Chest as I would cry thinking about what happened to the Garden the day YOU came.. the parents would be in tears as they are watching their children crying before the King.. PEH HA.. I am in the Back.. my Heart.. this Heart thinking about what I saw that day with the Parents when they too was a child.. I saw the King Looking.. YOUR Father was looking at all these People coming from the Garden and together crying Out because of what YOU have done as the Princess.. as the ROYAL BLOOD LINE and I saw Your Father.. the KING.. PEH HA.. his Heart was moved.. was touched by all these people coming together asking for YOU to be the Next Leader.. the QUEEN who can only rule for this Nation.. ONE BOY stands UP before the King.. your Father and tells Your Father that He is going to fight in the war.. even though he was Only a child.. I would watch a Girl stands up saying She will to enter the war to fight for this Nation and I begin to watch all the hands.. with the parents wanting to join in the Battle to fight in the war.. and I just could not believe they are going to give up their own Lived for this Nation.. for this Country.. for YOU HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH

I just can't take my off of the Two Baby Teddy Bears.. Son and Daughter who came into my House.. of course I never thought that I would ever meet your Children.. they are the two most beautiful children.. looking at the Son and looking at the daughter.. both are in the second room where it is suppose to be Only for the Guests to spend the night.. I am looking at the two.. holding hands and both are looking at the Art Sketch paper.. I drew a Picture of YOU looking at a picture that YOU gave me.. I would sit alone in the room.. while the two children were in the Guest room sleeping.. I just couldn't sleep.. I feel like even though YOU are far in a distant.. YOU had to go to a Business meeting and of course it is YOUR work.. as I would peek at the Door.. at the Guest room.. it is the room where the Two baby Teddy Bears would fall asleep.. and I told them both.. that YOU are going to be coming Home very SOON.. MOMMA is coming soon so be a Good Little boy.. Be a Good little Girl because YOUR MOMMA told me that she is going to give you something that YOU will Love forever and will enjoy to keep.. and I saw them Both sleeping.. as I would sit by the Desk.. picking UP an Art pencil and I bought the Art Sketch Book.. your Picture.. I put and it lean on the back of the desk where I can see your Whole Face.. it was a Nice peaceful time I had because I had the time to THINK for myself.. I had the Time to LOOK at your Picture.. which makes me Heart fall even deeper in Love with YOU.. changing the Diapers of the Two baby Teddy Bears.. putting on the T - shirt for the Boy and for the Girl.. your SON and Daughter.. I would have to call YOU which I know you are so Busy working and just the business meetings YOU have to spend for the company is NOT easy for YOU to get calls.. But.. of course YOU are so Kind.. YOU are so gentle with Care because your Children comes first.. I would watch YOU on the Face Time.. and the two baby Teddy bears.. the SON and Daughter.. when the Boy starts to cry for his MOMMA.. for YOU.. I would watch his Sister.. your Daughter starts to cry.. both holding hands and crying Loud for MOMMA.. and wanting to see YOU.. so I would have to pick Up my Phone.. call.. dial your Number just to see if it can reach YOU at this POINT of time.. which I would ask YOU.. your children are crying for YOU.. asking where is MOMMA.. I want to see My MOMMA and the cry grows louder.. My Heart would pound Heart as I would watch the two Holding hands.. sitting next to each Other.. asking for MOMMA.. of course it feels like the first day when they both came into the House.. it was the Most Hardest day I had to go through.. they just did Not stop crying.. I had to put the two BABY TEDDY BEARS.. SON and Daughter.. and they would sit on the couch or can be the sofa.. crying through the Night.. I just could not sleep.. they are so loud but when Both cries together.. I can feel the walls in the House be shaking.. so I had to just sit on the sofa.. if they two were on the couch.. if they both.. SON and Daughter were sitting on the SOFA.. I be sitting on the couch.. just wondering when would they stop crying.. Until I would call YOU.. and when YOU told me that it has to be a Face Time.. the two always wanted to see Your Face.. their MOMMA'S face.. I remember why did I not think of this SOONER.. but of course.. when I find that Out.. and I would walk up to the two Baby Teddy Bears.. the Son.. he grabs the Phone with two hands.. I see the Daughter his sister next to HIM and wipes the tears off his face.. the care and Love.. which touches my Heart and the Daughter.. I see her hugging her Brother and both cries together in each Other's shoulder asking for MOMMA.. I am thinking.. why do I have to see all these things to HIT my Heart.. feels like someone Hit me hard on my stomach and knock the wind off of Me when I see something like this.. and It was very hard to get through the first day.. I wanted to cry because I just did Not know what to do when the two Baby Teddy Bears feel so Scared.. and feels like they have lost their MOMMA.. just made me realize that I had to do something so that the two Baby Teddy Bears.. the Son and the Daughter feels more closer to YOU.. that is when I would pick UP the Phone and dial your Number and wait for YOU to pick UP on the Other Line.. and Yes.. right when I needed you the Most.. at the Most Hard moment.. I see you pick Up and asking me that YOU wanted to speak to your Children.. and I do remember YOU told me one thing.. a secret that the Children Loves.. the two baby Teddy Bears are so In to and to get their attention.. to read the two Baby Teddy Bears.. they have favorite BOOK that YOU would always read and start to choose books to read for them.. they.. the two BABY TEDDY BEARS.. the SON and the DAUGHTER.. they both loves to listen to stories.. a children's book is the best choice.. when I look at the two Baby Teddy Bears.. the SON and the Daughter.. it seems like they would NOT like to hear or will not want me to read them any Books.. it is just they don't want to listen right.. but.. the right Book stories.. they will.. so I would try to find Books in the House.. wondering.. which BOOK should I read to these two baby Teddy Bears.. what would the SON and the Daughter would enjoy to hear stories.. I know that They are NOT going to like what I like right.. So I would be spending some time on the Internet.. trying to find BOOKS that is very Popular for the children's Book.. and it shows just too many Books.. I would order it online and I would be waiting for the Next day shipping to come.. so that I can start to read Books to these Little Ones.. the Two Baby Teddy Bears.. I would hear the Knock.. and I would Open the Door to find a Box.. the Two baby Teddy Bears has been into the coloring Books.. I would buy crayons and thin books where it is Black and white which the two baby Teddy Bears.. the Son and the Daughter would love to color on the pages of these thin coloring Book.. I would peek open the Guest Door.. I would see the two Baby Teddy Bears sitting next to each Other.. holding crayons in the hands.. My Heart.. the SON is looking at the Sister.. the daughter.. she has the Little Princess coloring BOOK.. and the SON.. it is Ninja Turtles and transformers which I loved when I was a small Boy.. wondering will this SON.. the baby Boy love this too.. but I am looking at the SON looking at this Sisters colors.. the crayons and coloring over.. copying the same color as his sister.. of course.. I wanted to show this to YOU.. so I would call and dial up your Number.. of course I hope that I am not bothering you at this TIME of the day because it can be your Meeting at work.. and YOU pick UP and I would put on face time.. I would see you through the screen on this Phone.. in my heart.. I am missing YOU.. I am looking at your Children.. and I am watching your Children love colors.. they love to color on the Book on the pages.. and I wanted to show YOU what YOUR SON and your Daughter is doing.. I would give them the same Crayon Box and it has the crayon pencils and chalks.. as I open the guest door wide.. and I walk into the second room and I would sit in the middle of the two baby Teddy Bears.. and I would say to the children.. YOUR MOMMA on the Phone.. the two will stop coloring and turn to LOOK at YOU on the Phone.. the SON.. He grabs the Phone first and LOOKS at YOU.. and the shirt is dirty with colors all over.. and smiles looking at YOU.. I can hear your voice and you are asking your SON.. show MOMMA the Picture you color.. the SON.. the baby Teddy Bear turns to look at the Coloring BOOK on the Floor and picks UP to show YOU the Picture he is coloring.. my tears.. I just can't stop crying because I have never seen this SON being so Happy showing YOU he has an ART.. and the SON gives the Phone which is on FACE TIME to his Sister.. your Daughter.. and YOU say the same thing to your Daughter.. and the color are the Same with her Brother so I would see the Daughter.. the baby Teddy Bear smiles looking at you through the Face time on the Phone and I can hear your voice.. your Brother is copying YOU HUH and I hear both smiling.. and I am just sitting watch the SON.. He smiles real Big.. saying he loves to color and follow his sister.. I put my hand on my chest.. it touches my Heart.. why does it touch my Heart so bad right Now.. and the Daughter looks at Me and gives me the Phone and I am LOOKING at YOU.. and I see you smile real Big.. and I would say to YOU.. the Two baby Teddy Bears has come a long ways.. because.. I see the two baby Teddy Bears.. your SON and Daughter has a change of Heart.. when I came as the stranger who they did not even Know.. the two children would cry because they were afraid.. they were frighten.. they were both.. your Son and your Daughter were scared.. they did Not even look at me.. both holding hands.. and all they did was cry because I was a stranger to them.. I thought for a Long time.. the two Baby Teddy Bears will not accept Me.. I don't think they both.. your SON and Daughter would not give me a chance to get Close and will TEDDY BEARS.. SON and Daughter.. and they would sit on the couch or can be the sofa.. crying through the Night.. I just could not sleep.. they are so loud but when Both cries together.. I can feel the walls in the House be shaking.. so I had to just sit on the sofa.. if they two were on the couch.. if they both.. SON and Daughter were sitting on the SOFA.. I be sitting on the couch.. just wondering when would they stop crying.. Until I would call YOU.. and when YOU told me that it.. Has to be a Face Time.. the two always wanted to see Your Face.. their MOMMA'S face.. I remember why did I not think of this SOONER.. but of course.. when I find that Out.. and

I would walk up to the two Baby Teddy Bears.. the Son.. he grabs the Phone with two hands.. I see the Daughter his sister next to HIM and wipes the tears off his face.. the care and Love.. which touches my Heart and the Daughter.. I see her hugging her Brother and both cries together in each Other's shoulder asking for MOMMA.. I am thinking.. why do I have to see all these things to HIT my Heart.. feels like someone Hit me hard on my stomach and knock the wind off of Me when I see something like this.. and It was very hard to get through the first day.. I wanted to cry because I just did Not know what to do when the two Baby Teddy Bears feel so Scared.. and feels like they have lost their MOMMA.. just made me realize that I had to do something so that the two Baby Teddy Bears.. the Son and the Daughter feels more closer to YOU.. that is when I would pick UP the Phone and dial your Number and wait for YOU to pick UP on the Other Line.. and Yes.. right when I needed you the Most.. at the Most Hard moment.. I see you pick Up and asking me that YOU wanted to speak to your Children.. and I do remember YOU told me one thing.. a secret that the Children Loves.. the two baby Teddy Bears are so In to and to get their attention.. to read the two Baby Teddy Bears.. they have favorite BOOK that YOU would always read and start to choose books to read for them.. they.. the two BABY TEDDY BEARS.. the SON and the DAUGHTER.. they both loves to listen to stories.. a children's book is the best choice.. when I look at the two Baby Teddy Bears.. the SON and the Daughter.. it seems like they would NOT like to hear or will not want me to read them any Books.. it is just they don't want to listen right.. but.. the right Book stories.. they will.. so I would try to find Books in the House.. wondering.. which BOOK should I read to these two baby Teddy Bears.. what would the SON and the Daughter would enjoy to hear stories.. I know that They are NOT going to like what I like right.. So I would be spending some time on the Internet.. trying to find BOOKS that is very Popular for the children's Book.. and it shows just too many Books.. I would order it online and I would be waiting for the Next day shipping to come.. so that I can start to read Books to these Little Ones.. the Two Baby Teddy Bears.. I would hear the Knock.. and I would Open the Door to find a Box.. the Two baby Teddy Bears has been into the coloring Books.. I would buy crayons and thin books where it is Black and white which the two baby Teddy Bears.. the Son and the Daughter would love to color on the pages of these thin coloring Book.. I would peek open the Guest Door.. I would see the two Baby Teddy Bears sitting next to each Other.. holding crayons in the hands.. My Heart.. the SON is looking at the Sister.. the daughter.. she has the Little Princess coloring BOOK.. and the SON.. it is Ninja Turtles and transformers which I loved when I was a small Boy.. wondering will this SON.. the baby Boy love this too.. but I am looking at the SON looking at this Sisters colors.. the crayons and coloring over.. copying the same color as his sister.. of course.. I wanted to show this to YOU.. so I would call and dial up your Number.. of course I hope that I am not bothering you at this TIME of the day because it can be your Meeting at work.. and YOU pick UP and I would put on face time.. I would see you through the screen on this Phone.. in my heart.. I am missing YOU.. I am looking at your Children.. and I am watching your Children love colors.. they love to color on the Book on the pages.. and I wanted to show YOU what YOUR SON and your Daughter is doing.. I would give them the same Crayon Box and it has the crayon pencils and chalks.. as I open the guest door wide.. and I walk into the second room and I would sit in the middle of the two baby Teddy Bears.. and I would say to the children.. YOUR MOMMA on the Phone.. the two will stop coloring and turn to LOOK at YOU on the Phone.. the SON.. He grabs the Phone first and LOOKS at YOU.. and the shirt is dirty with colors all over.. and smiles looking at YOU.. I can hear your voice and you are asking your SON.. show MOMMA the Picture you color.. the SON.. the baby Teddy Bear turns to look at the Coloring BOOK on the Floor and picks UP to show YOU the Picture he is coloring.. my tears.. I just can't stop crying because I have never seen this SON being so Happy showing YOU he has an ART.. and the SON gives the Phone which is on FACE TIME to his Sister.. your Daughter.. and YOU say the same thing to your Daughter.. and the color are the Same with her Brother so I would see the Daughter.. the baby Teddy Bear smiles looking at you through the Face time on the Phone and I can hear your voice.. your Brother is copying YOU HUH and I hear both smiling.. and I am just sitting watch the SON.. He smiles real Big.. saying he loves to color and follow his sister.. I put my hand on my chest.. it touches my Heart.. why does it touch my Heart so bad right Now.. and the Daughter looks at Me and gives me the Phone and I am LOOKING at YOU.. and I see you smile real Big.. and I would say to YOU.. the Two baby Teddy Bears has come a long ways.. because.. I see the two baby Teddy Bears.. your SON and Daughter has a change of Heart.. when I came as the stranger who they did not even Know.. the two children would cry because they were afraid.. they were frighten.. they were both.. your Son and your Daughter were scared.. they did Not even look at me.. both holding hands.. and all they did was cry because I was a stranger to them.. I thought for a Long time.. the two Baby Teddy Bears will not accept Me.. I don't think they both.. your SON and Daughter would not give me a chance to get Close and will Not open their Hearts to Me at all.. but I remember you are the ONE who told Me.. that the two baby Teddy Bears.. both your SON and your Daughter.. all they needed was some TIME and patient and just give them LOVE.. share kindness and be gentle to them.. the Hearts will open UP as long as I am waiting and being patient but always go to them first.. and Love the two Children.. I would be asking.. what if it takes a Long time but.. your Words reassured me that the Two children.. the SON and the DAUGHTER will open UP.. just give time.. when I heard those words from YOU and How you told Me.. know what the two Children.. your SON and your Daughter Loves.. and I am trying to think.. and YOU told me.. when I look into the bag you brought to Me.. when I search and seek into It.. I will find OUT what they love and enjoy the Most. I remember opening the Bag.. I would find the crayons.. two Boxes and the coloring BOOK.. and I would find even the children's BOOK.. and that is when I started to work with Them.. and I would watch the tears turn into smiles as they would sit into the Guest ROOM.. the minds be so busy coloring.. I remember when the BOOKS of the children came.. I was able to go into the Guest ROOM.. and I would ask the SON and the Daughter.. can I read you a Children's BOOK to YOU.. will you please give me your TIME so that I can share you some stories.. and I was truly amazed how the Two baby Teddy Bears.. the SON and the DAUGHTER both drops what they were doing.. which is coloring on the coloring Books.. and they would sit next to each other holding Hands.. and it was time for the two Baby Teddy Bears to listen to stories and for me to read from the Book.. I would hear the Phone be ringing because it was that time.. the Hour has come and of course.. YOU would also listen to the Book.. the Children's BOOK as I would answer your CALL and put on the Face TIME.. I would be charging the PHONE as I would switch to Face time.. and I would give the Phone on face TIME.. the SON would grab the Phone first looking at you on face time.. and the Daughter sitting next to her Brother and Both are staring on to the screen of the Phone ON face time looking at YOU.. I would open the BOOK.. the children's Book and from the chapter One.. I would read from the first page and I would turn to the next page.. and I can see The two Baby Teddy Bears listening.. and I would hear your voice on the Other line.. asking the two Children about the page I was reading.. to share their thoughts to YOU.. and I would sit there and I would paused.. the SON would Look at you on the Phone confused.. I would hear the daughter able to share her thoughts to YOU looking at you on Daughter I ever seen.. and I saw the smile.. grabbing the SPOON.. putting a RICE and the beef.. the Mouth opens wide and I put the spoon into her mouth.. as I see her chew and eat.. I just could NOT hold my tears in.. I just could Not believe that finally I am able to feed this Little Daughter.. in the hand.. there is a Picture.. I would open her Hand and to look at what Picture and it is a Picture of YOU.. and I would look at YOU through this Picture.. my hand touches My Chest and I would say.. WHY do you Burn my Heart.. WHY do you do this TO ME and even bringing the Twins.. the Little SON and the Little Daughter.. my Heart beat faster as I spend the time with Them.. they are so Adorable and so Cute.. never imagined in my Life that I could even fall more harder for YOU because I feel like I am a part of something Bigger now.. I remember when YOU first called me on the Phone.. and asking ME that YOU had to go somewhere.. and YOU had a problem.. that YOU could Not take your Children with YOU.. and needed them to be place by somewhere safe and secure and wanted to ask me a Favor if I could baby sit your children while YOU are away on this Business journey.. I remember I paused for a few minutes.. trying to think straight because I was Not sure if it was the right THING to bring your Two Children

And YOU told me that they are two.. One is a Boy and the Other is a girl.. and they are Twins.. Little SON and the Little Daughter.. and it is a hard decision for YOU to leave them behind but this trip was very important for YOU.. of course I did Not want to say NO.. I had NO experience of How to deal with kids.. I never had any children on my own so I am Not sure what I am suppose to DO.. but.. of course I know that THIS IS a very Important business meeting.. this trip YOU must take and YOU MUST go so I told YOU.. Yes.. it is because I love YOU.. it is because It is YOU and as long as it is YOU WHO I LOVE the Most.. it does Not matter.. because I will try to be a GOOD baby sitter.. I remember when the DOOR knocked on the Front Door.. did Not expected much.. opening the DOOR.. I saw the Two crying.. I was Not sure.. How am I suppose to handle both be crying.. holding unto MOMMA.. and when YOU try to bring the LITTLE SON closer.. and He was in your Arm and the Little Daughter.. You were holding her hands.. and I saw your steps closer asking me to hold and Carry the Little SON.. he started to Cry Louder as He came into my Arms.. and the Little Daughter started to cry louder and sat on the Floor.. did Not want to come into the House.. and as I would look at this.. My Heart started to feel cracking inside.. started to feel this breaking deep within me.. WHY.. they do not understand why YOU have to leave them with Me.. and when I went inside the House holding the Baby Teddy Bear.. the Little SON.. He is looking at YOU from the back.. arms stretching to YOU.. and Made me stop.. My Heart just could Not handle this pain of hearing this ONE cry and asking for YOU.. asking for His MOMMA and WHY you had to leave HIM with me.. and I would stand still thinking.. what am I suppose to do if they keep on crying.. asking for YOU.. and what do I do when they keep crying over and over.. and I turn around to ask YOU this Question.. I see you walk into this House.. YOU were holding the Other Little BABY Teddy Bear.. the Little Daughter.. and YOU went over to the Couch and Put the Little Daughter to sit still and I would come over to Place and sit the Little SON next to her.. both crying.. and hands be rubbing the eyes looking at YOU and Looking at me.. and I would say.. and YOU would give a Phone to the Little Daughter.. and Placing the Hand of the Little SON.. telling the Two YOU be coming Home soon.. and that I am a BABY Sitter for few days so Don't cry.. and I see the two Stop crying when YOU tell them that.. and I see YOU with Your Other Phone and YOU dial the Number.. and the Phone would ring.. the Little Daughter looks at the Phone.. the Little SON looks at the Phone and presses.. and It is the Face Time.. and the two looks at the Face Time.. I see YOU walking back.. and YOU are talking to the two Little BABY TEDDY BEARS and I would watch them smile.. hands be waving looking at YOU through the Phone and giving them two Pictures.. One for the Little SON and the Other for the Little Daughter.. so that YOU are near and YOU gave me One too.. and as I would look at YOU.. I would watch YOU say good bye and Left the Front Door.. I remember the first Night.. I just could Not sleep at all.. and the two Would Not sleep either.. both sitting on the Couch and would be crying.. asking for YOU.. for MOMMA.. of course every one Hour I would hear the Phone ringing and the Two siting next to each Other.. they would fight for the Phone.. pushing the Button for the Face TIME.. I see them showing Teeth and growling that One of them has to talk and the Other.. as I would watch still on the corner.. I did Not want to bother any of them because of how the two.. the Little BABY TEDDY bears kept on crying crying after YOU would hang UP the Phone.. pushing and shoving who is going to answer next.. after a long period of time crying.. I would hear silence.. and when I look at the Couch.. the two be sleeping next to each other.. and I would walk into the ROOM.. and the Picture YOU gave me.. I would go over to the desk and sit alone.. looking at your Picture.. I would be thinking.. they been crying all through the day after you left.. and the two do Not want to eat either.. they do NOT want to drink any waters.. sits on that couch.. LOOKS at your Pictures crying and looks at the Phone to see it rings.. and I am looking at your Picture.. but YOU are so Beautiful.. why did YOU have to bring those two into my House and I know that I have NO experience with children.. what if they keep on crying asking for YOU.. I hear where is MOMMA.. why isn't MOMMA calling the Phone.. and Keeps on crying for YOU.. and Now there is Peace and silence as I am sitting in this ROOM alone.. of course if the Two Little Ones are crying Out for YOU.. asking and missing YOU.. I know that my Heart truly feels the same.. that I do want to see YOU SOON too and that I know what the two Little TEDDY BEARS are feeling.. that they want to see YOU SOON.. how about me.. How about My Heart.. what would you do if I cry like the two Little Ones.. the Teddy Bears missing their MOMMA.. what would you do if I showed you my tears and telling you that my Heart is being shattered.. it is this Pain.. this sharp pain I feel inside because I miss YOU.. that I want to be near YOU and to tell YOU how much I love YOU.. would you let me show YOU my Tears because what My Heart truly feels for YOU.. that I want to say I love YOU.. why can't I say it to YOU and tell you how much I do.. I want to tell YOU to let YOU know to say it and to say I love you hurts me the Most because that is when I misses YOU the Most.. I wish that YOU knew.. I wish that YOU know right Now.. the Two baby Teddy bears are sleeping right Now which NOW I am able to speak to YOU.. but I know that Heart.. I know this Heart.. I know How it feels to be broken and missing.. wanting to see YOU over and over again.. this Cry.. it cries and cries.. My Heart cries OUT loud the way the two Baby Teddy Bears be crying Out.. wiping the Tears.. grabbing unto the Phone.. pushing each Other for the Next to LOOK at YOU.. saying It is Mine turn to see.. and cries after the Hanging UP on the Phone and looking at YOU.. LOOKING at your Picture crying of these sorrows in the Hearts.. I would watch the Two Little BABY Teddy bears.. sitting on that Couch.. I know that Heart.. I can feel that Pain in the Heart because that is HOW I feel to when YOU are Gone.. when YOU are far away which leaves me to be more lonely than ever.. just to be with YOU.. just to tell YOU.. but my Words can't say it.. I see the two., saying I MISS YOU.. and I love YOU.. LOOKING at you when the Two looks at YOU through the Face Time.. but I stand still.. it kills me the Most.. it eats me at it inside because I wish that I can be like the two TEDDY BEARS.. your Children who is able to say it and tell It the way it just feels inside but I just cannot.. and I would watch them cry.. I cry with the Two watching on the SIDELINE because.. I want to go over to the Phone.. looking at you on the Face TIME and when I look at you through the PHONE on FACE TIME.. just to tell YOU with my tears in my eyes to say it with Means.. I miss YOU and I love YOU.. why can't you be here so that I don't needs to cry any more and watch the Children to cry along with me.. it burns My Heart into pieces.. it burns because it hurts so much.. this PAIN of loving YOU.. I may become sick.. sick inside because I am Loving you just too much just for too long.. that IS how much I love YOU..I am sitting on the Couch.. on my Lap is the Little Son.. the Baby Teddy Bear.. Next to me sitting is the Other baby Teddy Bear.. the Daughter.. I am smiling.. looking at the Picture.. and on my Lap.. the Little Son.. the baby Teddy Bear is looking at YOU.. and I am missing YOU.. asking when YOU are coming.. I want to show you the Two Little Ones.. the children are.. YOU to me.. and tells me I love YOU.. and I miss MOMMA.. I am sitting on the couch.. they are expressing what I am feeling all of the Time.. I know that I can truly relate but the problem is there is Nothing I can do.. what am I suppose to say when YOU Miss.. and has NO answers to what I am feeling because I know How it is hurting me More.. I feel like for myself.. but when YOU can the children involve.. I feel like I am taking more loads on my Heart.. why can't you come Home.. why cant you come sooner.. the two are always missing YOU.. asking me where are YOU.. and they sit on the floor.. LOOKING at the front Door.. and I know if I try to pick the two UP.. One will cry because.. and I have to hear the other One cry too.. and it can get to YOU sometimes.. I wish I can find a way that NO ONE gets hurt and I just don't have to be hearing more cries.. as I walk out of the room.. I would watch the two Baby Teddy Bears falls asleep.. I had to give the two a Bath.. putting the Bubbles into the bath tub.. the two enjoyed taking a Bath in the bubble.. I had to put them into the Crib because It was the bed Time.. I grab a Book and started to read them and I saw the two baby Teddy Bears.. the Little SON and the Daughter.. they both started to sleep while I was reading a children's book.. as I watch the two sleeping.. I would smile looking at the two children.. they are so Beautiful.. of course they are Your Babies so it makes it more beautiful for me to see.. as I would walk out of the room.. I go into my room and sit on the chair.. with the desk.. I am looking at Your Picture.. and it is the Picture of YOU and the two Baby Teddy Bears.. the Little SON sitting on your Lap.. and the Daughter.. she is sitting on the couch next to YOU.. with a Yellow Bow on top of the Head.. My Heart moves.. LOOKING at this picture.. My Heart screams from the Inside.. and

I have bought an Art.. the GIANT SKETCH BOOK.. and I would sit.. wanting to draw the Picture of YOU.. with the two Children.. am I loving YOU more.. I can't stop looking at Your Picture.. with the two children.. the Little SON and the Daughter.. why did you have to come and introduce me to the two.. when ever I look at the two.. I am only seeing YOU more but my Heart just loves YOU more.. when the two sits next with me.. and I watch them smile.. it kills me inside because they make me smile.. my heart lights UP on fire when I see the two.. I am holding the hands of the Little SON.. I try to get him to walk.. but He sits and cries instead.. trying to teach the BABY TEDDY BEAR.. the Little SON to walk.. I remember I called YOU on the Phone.. and I wanted to face time.. and I saw YOU on the Phone.. with my two hands.. I held the two hands of the Little SON.. the Baby Teddy Bear.. trying to get two legs to get UP.. and through the Face time YOU saw your SON.. and he falls and starts to cry.. and the Daughter starts to cry with her Brother.. and I had to let you go on the Face time.. and I am sitting on the chair.. looking at the Picture and thinking of these little flashbacks.. and I grab the Pencil.. which it is use to draw.. but I just could not draw.. I know that YOU be coming soon.. when YOU come.. I know the two Little Ones.. the Two Baby Teddy Bears are going to go with you.. that Means.. it is going to break my Heart.. not just going to be missing YOU but also the two Little ones you brought.. I know that I needs to do this.. so I would look at the Picture of YOU.. Looking at the Little SON sitting on top of Your lap and LOOKING at the Daughter who is sitting next to YOU.. OH MY HEART.. these precious Little Ones.. MY Heart.. what are you doing to this Heart of Mine.. why did YOU have to bring them to Me.. so that YOU can Punish me for doing you a good thing.. but Look what is going to happen to My Heart.. and I grab the Pencil.. the Art pencil and starts to draw on the Piece of Ark sketch Paper.. what if I just can't finish because of My Heart.. LOOK at the Precious Little Ones.. the Little SON.. and the Daughter.. and I would think about.. Holding the Book.. and I am sitting on the floor.. the Two baby Teddy Bears.. the brother and sister.. the children.. they are holding hands and I am reading the children story.. and I be reading Out loud so the two can hear the stories.. and I asked the two.. the Little SON and the Daughter.. do YOU like stories.. and I see the heads goes UP and down telling me Yes.. they love stories.. and I would say to the two children.. I love stories too.. and I would hear the Phone ring.. and On face time it is YOU who was calling.. at this Hour.. before going to Bed.. YOU would tell me that the two Needs to be read.. that I needs to pick a children's book and starts to read or they will Not go to sleep.. so I would look at the Phone.. and I would see YOU.. and the two baby Teddy Bears.. they know it is MOMMA on the Other side.. and I would give the Daughter the Phone.. and I see her looking at YOU and with a Big SMILE.. waving hand at YOU.. and I would open the Book.. and I would start to read the sentences.. paragraphs it becomes.. and I can hear YOU on the Phone telling the Two LITTLE ONES.. and the Daughter would hand to the LITTLE SON.. and Looks at YOU.. Looking at MOMMA.. and I can hear YOU on the Other side asking the two Children.. what is the story about and to explain to YOU.. as I would read and Pause.. I hear answers coming out trying to answer the questions.. and I sit still.. the two Baby Teddy Bears.. both looking at YOU through the Face TIME of the Phone.. trying to tell YOU the answers.. Fussing and bumping into each other.. of course.. after a time.. I would watch the two Letting YOU go on the Other side.. and I would look at the two Little Ones looking at me.. and I would continue to read the Children's Book.. open my mouth loud and clear.. and I would watch the two.. the eyes would get heavy and both sleeps on the Floor.. One at a time.. I would pick UP.. with the Daughter first.. putting Her into her crib and then I would go and pick UP the Little SON.. which I would stand still.. Holding Him in my arms like he is my SON.. and I would slowly put him into his crib.. and turning Off the Light.. I would leave the room.. I am sitting in my room.. just thinking about the day.. I would love to draw the sketch.. but I know that I am not that good in drawing at all.. I am truly terrible at it.. I am not sure why I grab me the Art Pencil when I know that I just can't finish it.. but deep in my heart.. I do want to draw YOU.. and looking at the Picture.. the two Baby Teddy Bears.. Not just YOU but with the two children on the Picture.. but My Heart just won't let me do it.. because I know it will shatter inside because I love YOU.. My Heart will shatter into pieces because I know that the two will be leaving soon.. of course I wish that the two Little Children can stay more longer.. but the More longer they are with me.. More I feel like it is Hurting me instead.. what if I would say to YOU.. don't let the children leave me.. I would be crazy before Your Eyes and I know that they belong.. they came with YOU and that is why I know they must go with YOU.. My Heart just can't accept that the two Baby Teddy Bears be leaving me soon.. and it is hurting me right Now because I know this.. of course they must go with YOU.. as I sit still in the silent.. I receive a Message from YOU.. and YOU have sent me something.. it is a New Picture of YOU.. and YOU are showing me.. telling me where YOU are.. and as I would look on the Phone to take a look at the New Picture of YOU.. and I know that the Children.. the two Baby Teddy Bears will love this Picture of YOU.. of their MOMMA.. which YOU are smiling in this One.. that YOU are doing so GOOD.. this is what I wanted to see.. what I wanted to hear.. and I hear the phone ringing.. and I picked UP the Phone to hear Your Voice.. and I would tell YOU.. after the face time.. I know that the children.. the two Baby TEDDY BEARS would be arguing and they would fuss at each other because they wanted to give YOU the answers.. and Yes.. I had to let YOU go to get this issue solved.. did I finish reading the children's BOOK.. while I was reading the stories to them.. I saw the eyes.. the Daughter first.. the eyes grew tired and I saw the two eyes would close and She lay on the floor sleeping.. I would keep on reading the Children's book and I would look at the eyes of the Little SON.. which he grew tired too.. both eyes started to close and He lays on the floor sleeping next to his sister.. I would keep on reading for at least 30 more minutes.. as I close the Children's Book.. I would pick UP the Daughter first and Put her in the Crib.. and I would go over to the Little SON and Pick Him up next.. Putting HIM into his crib.. and I stood watching the two sleeping.. holding the Daughter.. the BABY TEDDY BEAR in my arms.. I hear I miss MOMMA.. as I would walk out of the room where the two are sleeping.. I would be thinking of YOU and I go into my room.. sitting on the chair next to the desk.. I would LOOK at the Picture of YOU with the two Little ONES.. BABY TEDDY BEARS.. the Daughter and the Little Son.. the Little SON sitting on your Lap and the Daughter sitting next to YOU with the Little Yellow Bow on top of I am just.. my Heart.. My Chest.. My Heart.. How much these two are missing their MOMMA.. wanting to see.. I see both ears.. trying to listen to the Voice of their MOMMA.. and I would look at the two.. they are so Beautiful.. both.. the twins.. the Baby Teddy Bears.. both so Cute but so Beautiful.. I would turn around.. and I do remember.. I was sitting down on the chair.. by the desk.. Looking at your Picture.. I would look and say to Your Picture.. when can I see YOU.. will you let me hold YOU.. will you let me love YOU.. I know I can love you the way YOU want to be held and want to be loved.. I know that I can love you in a way you would never felt before.. I can tell YOU.. tell YOU how much I miss YOU.. How Much I love YOU.. but.. YOU have to give me the permission.. allow me to tell YOU that I love YOU.. and I would be looking at your Picture.. when will you come around so that I can see YOU.. My hand grabbing unto the Pencil.. looking at a sketch of paper.. My hand starts to trace.. using the pencil to draw.. and I am looking at your picture.. to draw you on this sketch paper.. and right when I was about to go deeper.. I hear a knock on the door.. DOK DOK DOK.. and I am wondering.. who be knocking at the front door at this time of hour.. it is getting late.. and I am thinking.. maybe I am just too tired that I am hearing things.. so I would begin to use my hand to draw.. I hear another Knocking at the Door.. DOK DOK DOK.. and I know this time I heard it right.. so I put the Pencil down.. on top of the Desk and I get UP.. pull out of the chair and I would walk to the front door.. I hear another knocking.. DOK DOK DOK.. I would unlock and Open the Door.. I see you standing there.. and I see you have brought companies.. it is the Twins.. two Baby Teddy Bears.. and I am wondering.. why would you bring the two Babies here late at night.. is something wrong.. but.. YOU be telling me you are leaving on a vacation.. and wanted me to baby sit the two Baby Teddy Bears.. but I have No children.. and I have NO experiences with kids.. or babies.. why would you bring them over to my House.. and YOU are asking me that it be for few days.. but looking at the two Baby Teddy Bears.. they are the most cute and you have brought what I can use for the two.. what do I do if the two Baby Teddy Bears starts to cry.. asking for MOMMA.. and if they start to miss their MOMMA.. what am I suppose to do then.. because I have No experiences at all.. and I see you get closer.. trying to hand me over the Little SON.. and as I would hold on with my arms

The Baby Teddy Bear.. the Little Son starts to cry.. and I see the Little SON.. Arms stretching out to YOU.. because He does not want to come to me.. the Cry gets louder and louder.. and arms stretching out to YOU.. wanting to Go to YOU instead of Me.. and His cry so Loud.. hurting my ears.. and I am not sure.. It is so hard for me to control.. and I would ask YOU to come inside.. I see the Other Baby Teddy Bear.. the Daughter starts to cry too.. both being very loud cries.. I just don't know what to do.. why are you leaving them with Me.. they are both crying loud for YOU.. asking to take them with YOU.. My Heart hurts.. it hurts because I know How it feels to be in a pain when YOU leave.. as YOU would try to give me the Other Teddy Bear.. the Daughter.. She is even more worst.. YOU had to hold Her close.. and She would sleep in your arms.. Would not even come to me.. kicking and screaming when YOU try to get her close to me.. and what happens when the Other Baby Teddy Bear wakes UP and knows YOU are not in the House.. but has left her with Me.. the Other Baby Teddy Bear will find Out that YOU are gone.. but for now.. she may sleep.. if the Other Baby Teddy Bear.. the Daughter did not come to me when YOU were here.. I know she is Not going to come to me when I am alone with Her.. I feel so Bad.. My Heart breaks as I would watch the Little SON.. He sees you walking.. the BABY TEDDY Bear starts to crawl after you.. I am watching.. my eyes.. I feel my tears going to pour out.. as I see you walking fast.. going to the front DOOR and the Little SON.. the Baby Teddy Bear crawls crying after you.. as I watch YOU leave the front door.. and the door closes behind.. the Little Son.. baby Teddy Bear sits and cries.. and sits by the door waiting for YOU as He keeps on crying for his MOMMA.. I am standing behind.. just wiping my tears.. It hurts.. this Pain.. it feels like a sharp pain has entered in me.. It hurts watching the Little Son.. hurting.. crying for his Momma.. and turn to look at me crying.. tears hitting the floor.. and turns to look at the door.. what do I do.. tell me.. what am I suppose to do when It hurts me just watching One breaking Heart.. what do I do.. I wanted to go.. Open that front Door and run after YOU.. grab Your Arm and pull and to let YOU see.. LOOK at the Little SON.. look at HIM crying.. why do I have to be the one to watch His tears run down like this.. WHY do you have to break my Heart when I have done nothing to YOU.. why come over and look at the Heart pieces falling apart.. WHY do I have to be the one with the Broken Heart.. it hurts me more than It hurts YOU.. as I would walk.. closer to the Baby Teddy Bear.. the Little Son.. keeps on crying.. pointing to the Door.. wanting to go with YOU.. but.. I know that I can't take this Little ONE to YOU.. and I am just standing here.. I am not sure what am I suppose to do at this Point.. because I can't help this Little Son.. even though I want too.. but.. YOU be telling me you wanted to be time alone.. you just wanted so time off.. to refresh Your Head and that is why YOU are leaving and has made me to be the Baby sitter for the Two Baby Teddy Bears.. I know you have brought all that is needed for them.. so that part I am ready to do what I was told me to do.. but.. I just can't take the pains of the two baby Teddy Bears be crying.. Now.. I am looking at the two Baby Teddy Bears.. both sitting on the top of the Bed.. with the Phone in their Ears listening to Your Voice.. Both looks at each other and smiles knowing that They are hearing their MOMMA on the Other side.. so I am getting closer.. and I am wondering.. few days.. but when is that the few days end.. so that I can focus on drawing picture of you on the New Sketch Paper Book I just bought from an Art Shop.. I want to draw a picture of YOU and to show YOU when it is all completed.. I be drawing YOU.. for a long time I wanted to draw a picture of YOU.. I know that I am Not good in drawing.. but I do want to try so that I can tell YOU.. I can show YOU this is My Heart.. Not Just My Heart.. but it is My Love.. this is a way I want to tell YOU how much I love YOU.. but I need a time alone.. I need my own time.. if the two Baby Teddy Bears are here.. I know that I can't draw anything.. so I would get close to the Two baby Teddy Bears.. I am asking if I can have the phone Back.. so that I can talk to YOU.. but it seems like the two Baby Teddy Bears does Not want to give me the Phone.. they want to hear their Momma speak on the Other side.. I see the smiles and giggles together.. it look so beautiful.. how the two are so Beautiful when they smile.. just like their MOMMA.. YOU are the most Beautiful when YOU smile.. as I would watch the Phone being hung UP.. and the two sitting on the Bed.. looking at me.. I am not sure what am I suppose to do now.. they just looks at me.. and both starts to cry.. crying loud wanting to see their MOMMA..I am sitting by the desk.. I am looking at the shot glass.. and grabbed the Bottle of whiskey and poured into the Shot glass.. placing the whiskey down.. picked up the shot glass.. opened my mouth and take a shot.. I am trying to forget YOU.. but I just can't.. I have placed your picture on the top of the desk.. I keep on looking at this picture.. I tell myself I needs to stop.. but I feel like I needs to keep on looking.. I would look at your picture and say.. why are you doing this to me.. why do I have to keep on looking at you.. of course I have a pencil and a clean white sheet of paper.. I want to draw.. looking at your picture.. I want to draw the picture of you.. but I know that I am not that good in drawing at all.. but I can feel.. this whiskey starts to kick my head.. I feel light headed and buzzing.. I know I drank so that I can forget you.. but why is it that I am missing you more now.. I just can't take my eyes off of you.. as I am looking at your picture.. why can't your picture talk back to me.. I want to hear something from you.. but no matter how many times I am going to tell you looking at your picture.. I will not hear anything from the Other side.. but I want to hear from you.. Please.. tell me something so that I don't feel the light headed I am feeling at this point right now.. YOU know that I love you.. I can tell you many times that I love YOU.. can you tell me something.. can you hear me say the words to YOU.. I love you.. and I grab the pencil.. starts to trace and starts to draw.. of course I am looking at your picture.. as I stopped.. putting the pencil down.. I have drawn a picture of a Heart.. I know that I am missing your Heart.. and I am looking at this pieces of paper.. looking at the Heart.. this is suppose to be your Heart.. so that I can touch it.. as my hand Teddy Bear.. a Son.. who is crying for YOU.. asking me where is MOMMA.. how am I suppose to answer the Baby Teddy Bear's question.. I want to know where YOU are.. but only thing I have is your picture.. I want to hear from you as much as this SON in the room.. crying and crying.. I thought that something was wrong with me.. I thought that My Heart was crying.. crying because I miss YOU.. that I love YOU.. that I want to see YOU and that I want to be close to YOU.. I heard this cry.. but it is Loud cry.. and I turn to look at the bed.. the baby Teddy Bear looks at me.. and I see the tears keeps on dropping.. wetting the bed.. and starts to cry and cry.. I am getting more emotional.. I am trying to get drunk.. but this Baby Teddy Bear is not helping me at at.. and I go over to the Bed and I sit.. I show the Baby Teddy Bear.. this Picture.. is it your Momma and the head moves up and down.. and I give the baby Teddy Bear the picture.. He wraps his arms around your picture and says MOMMA.. and I ask him.. where is your Momma.. please tell me.. and I would say.. I will take you to her.. I would wrap my arms around the baby Teddy Bear and I would lift him up and I get up out of the bed.. Tell me where is Your Momma.. so I can take you to her.. the Baby Teddy bear does not answer.. and I would walk out of the room.. and I am walking down the hall way and I stop.. I see you Holding the Other Teddy Bear.. the Daughter and I see you turn around and you looking at me.. and I am holding the Baby Teddy Bear.. my arms wrapped around.. and I look at you.. I think you have left this.. He is looking for Momma.. and I would see you placing the Other Teddy Bear.. wearing a pink shirt.. and she starts to cry.. Arms stretching out towards you.. and I see you walking closer to me.. and I hear.. MOMMA.. and I look down.. the Baby teddy Bear.. arms are around your picture.. I see you kneel and arms stretches out.. and I would lower myself.. opens my arm.. the Baby Teddy Bear walks slowly.. arms around your picture.. and falls.. starts to cry loud.. and I am thinking.. this Baby Teddy Bear.. I see you get up and I see your arms around the Baby Teddy Bear.. arms around and Lift him up.. I see you holding the Baby Teddy Bear close in your arms.. I see the picture falling and hits the floor.. as you are stand up walking.. the Baby Teddy Bear falls asleep in your arms.. I am looking.. and you go over to the Other Teddy Bear.. the Daughter and you are looking at the two.. my hand grabs your picture and I am looking at Your Picture.. looking at you with two children.. and I see smiles with the Daughter.. the Other Teddy bear as you are touching.. am I suppose to fall in love with this.. what am I suppose to do at this point.. and how about me.. can I be a part of that circle.. I want to hold YOU.. and I want to be held by you the way you are holding the two Teddy Bears.. I see smiles and giggles.. but I want to be a part.. I want to smile and giggle along side.. holding YOU close in my arms.. and holding the baby Teddy Bear.. and Holding YOU to tell you that I love you.. as I am sitting on the floor.. I just want to be with YOU.. I want to be a part so that I can feel the love.. loving YOU