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All people come to terms on their own time. Love one another. If your mature enough to see your more mature than your parents, your mature enough to love others unconditionally.

First class

Yep we have DID and it can get messy because it was born from trauma and so yeah you can’t make everyone happy. When you do fuse at least with us we let it happen naturally but we are doing the functional multiple thing you can say. Good video.

“…that deep, best friend, mate level…” - I don’t think I exist at that level

Yes. In my family emotions were not to be talked about. And if so you were shunned

my face when she started talking about the feeling of loneliness and hostility about my inner world: 😦 i bought her book on Amazon before i even got halfway through this video.

I really like Dr Gibbons’ in-a-nutshell explanation at the beginning of what EIPs are. I thought I had come to a point of acceptance and was managing my relationship with my mom really well until I had my baby. Every time I’ve seen her since I gave birth I’ve felt anger and I also end up getting physically sick somehow. Cutting ties is probably what I should do, but that’s not something I can do easily for various reasons so I really don’t know what to do other than to look for an energy coach because I’m starting to wonder if my mom’s just so toxic that her mere presence in my proximity makes me sick. If anyone has the same experience please share any suggestions 🙏🏻

I’m surprised there’s no comments yet, this story is so relatable. It’s not been my exact experience but I know someone very similar to this man, and everyone has reacted so similar when I tried to confront him. Thanks for helping us feel less alone and for confirming we’re not crazy 😅😂 Looking forward to more of your content 💖

Woman in pink doesn’t need to say mmhmm and yeah every second.

Both my mother and father unfortunately act like teenagers… the arguments, reactions to everything.. Now I’m in my 30s with my own kids I just shake my head.

“The more internalizing person might feel rude when they change the direction of the conversation.” Could this mean, in some cases it is okay to interrupt -- an off topic, “helps me feel” annoyed - monologue, to get back to the subject of the meeting?😅

“The more internalizing person might feel rude when they change the direction of the conversation.” Could this mean, in some cases it is okay to interrupt -- an off topic, “helps me feel” annoyed - monologue, to get back to the subject of the meeting?😅

It all gets rather complex. In my experience, when the child is placed in multiple roles (parent, abused child, ...) there is splitting that goes on, resulting in personas that come forward as adults under different emotional conditions (normal, stressed, weak, ...)

I know this kind of evil first hand. Because of the father figure they PLAY we believed The evil resided in itself! That it was not that bad The contrast is too big, not possible! Well, a small innocence child things this way and many therapists thing this way, too! Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.

A problem I'd notice was they could identify and empathize with fictional characters well. But when that same or similar situation was happening in their very lives, there would be no empathy.

Hi thank you for this. I actually checked out few times while listening Looking for some help!

I’m 62 years old and I don’t have finances to be able to afford any resources to help me. I’m lost??

I suppose as children we find ways to “hide” from our dangerous emotional reality.Survival comes first. They are all time frozen trances or ego defence. A safe place.

I just read the book and it is so helpful

I think of my mum as a 'scaregiver'

How do we make ourselves feel safe if we’re alone have one or more people exploiting us? I’m not convinced that feeling safe is the only way to move forward.

Very Great And exactly hits home!!

YEAH. YEAH YEAH. Most spoken word. Nice discussion....

Brilliant!

Person minimizing her experience as though it is a big joke. Healing is not indicated when person still resorts to embarrassed giggling about what is demonic and tragic. Lots of self-blame here.

Love your podcast!

I went no contact with my emotionally immature mother because I was tired of being an afterthought. Everything is about her, and she doesn’t give two sh*ts about my inner world. Not to mention her emotional outbursts are just plain crazy. Of course she painted herself as the victim and made it look like I’m just making a mountain of a mole hill. She has zero capacity to look at her own actions critically. Everything is always someone else’s fault.

I have a question in mind:..when the child needs a hug from me do i imagine myself giving her a hug in the memory or if not what should i do ?

This is excellent! Such wonderful and valuable information!!

Williams Robert Lopez Jessica Moore Christopher

Be everything for yourself… screw other people… they can’t fill you

Yeah this is like the child that becomes king they sit there and everyone plays the game with them isn't it

I see my mother as a spoiled first born who was supposed to be a boy and took charge of her parents and then my father also took charge of the deaf parents

In the 1970s my mother denied any changes going on in culture that her children were smoking pot or drinking too much just look the other way and my father was a police officer and he could have helped them it was normal you could have been upset but she just minimizes everything into a childish review

I am delighted to find you on my YT feed with this interview. I just purchased the book the day before and it is so good. Will check out your library to see what else you have shared.

We always have to look at ourselves when we are emotionally triggered and see why.

Can anyone admit to becoming the emotionally immature parent?? I see these videos and just see finger pointing and no one admitting that they too had to heal the wounds that were passed on down the line. I’m not perfect and sometimes I have to admit that and stop blaming my parents for the skills that they did not have, and take the load that was given to me and heal it because I’m strong. I have messed up royally in life and that pain has been the reason for my healing journey. My parents were not perfect and they were adult children. I too became that adult child because I did not have the skills.

Dr. Gibson is such a blessing ❤

It is important to recognize that every parent does the best they can with whatever resources they have - whether internal or external. Parents often parent through their own childhood trauma. I’ve worked with children and families for over ten years and the majority of my work has been with the parents. Making the parents feel understood and heard is always crucial to assisting them with seeing how their own behaviors are negatively impacting their child’s behaviors. These are typically parents who felt neglected, abused, and devalued as children themselves. So whenever there is conflict, they revert back to that hurt child and lash out.

I think being lied to about your past intentionally and being told how you are supposed to feel happy and grateful with no acknowledgement of possible trauma is what rubbed me the wrong way most. Once I realized that there is a good reason why I don't feel like I fit in or don't know who I am I can start to heal. Without honesty how do you expect us to become our full potental

This is the best explanation I have ever heard. I have learned so much.

That segment - from 2 minutes to 10 minutes - should be its own video. That was an excellent overview of the whole dynamic.

So narcissists are just emotionally immature adults?

Thank you for sharing❤. I went through almost two decades of wrong and harmful treatment, now at 45 I have received the correct diagnosis.

So cool that you had Lindsay on your show. Btw her website NEW isn't working

OMG OMG you got Dr Lindsay Gibson on a podcast. Very nice.

Brilliant understanding of this subject. I'm clearly the internalizer. This is a lifelong cross.

This is an important conversation. Not only should we date someone for a long time before becoming exclusive or intermingling lives, but we should avoid sexual relationships because sex releases oxytocin, and other chemicals that make it seem like a connection exist when it may not be able to exist in reality due to the level of emotional maturity, or the level of values similarity, which can only be known over time and through many vulnerable discussions.

I followed along and tried to connect with my vulnerable self at 5 years old. But she was completely shut down with no idea about how the world worked. She was too far gone to trust anyone. It was too late. I couldn't access any earlier events. I do know from years of therapy and insights from relatives that my very early life was violent and chaotic. Now I feel very sad that I sat with my young self and witnessed a little girl who appeared dead inside. By 5 years old, ot was already too late.