hello! Thank you for posting this. I wondered when do we upload the civil documents? Will it be prombted once its approved? I have the documents that include my spouses records.

Arrived in the US 6 months ago and I am starting to plan my exit strategy. The drain and emotional torture is real. So many calls and emails about guys wanting to come..it's simple just come decided what you want and have backup money...sometimes things go haywire and it only takes a missed paycheck to be homeless 😢

It’s easier if the parents stay together. That’s the core problem. Mom and dad, do it all together!!

There is a very old saying in Europe... In Europe you work to live, in America you live to work...no therapy needed, except the reality of free enterprise The American dream is real, with a successful plan and HARD WORK, you can go from rags to riches quicker and more freely than anywhere else, sadly a few will achieve it, the rest of us will just live freely but WORK HARD til older age...sorry, no therapy required to see truth

We are in the same boat.

Hang in there sis dont give up be positive about life and opportunities you have, try to live one day at a time, look for support system it will ease your burden. Here in kenya things are hard no jobs and we still have bills to pay its crazy.. plan well before relocating....if you have relatives in kenya you can trust with your children you can bring them in kenya and be able to plan well...

I'm sorry that's happening to you. But that is the system. We (AAs) are used to it. But if I could, I would move to motherland. Problem is, I don't know where to go or who my relatives are. Its been 15-20 generations. The chain is broken.

It's just a dream.... it's not real... The problem is, is that we're still asleep.... And until we come together as one and unite nothing will get better... And that's 💯 PCT ✌️😎

Nice neighborhood. Well-planned, neat and clean. I like the side walk.

You must overcome the FEAR of being thought of as a FAILURE. And it’s okay to FAIL but have a PEACEFUL LIFESTYLE.

As a Kenyan man, we come from a shaming society and the stigma of going back home is incredibly real. Many of us who came to the US by way of Harambee from the entire village the EXPECTATION from the village is depressing. We feel indebted to help and it is also expected to help the village. Going back and the only thing you have done in your village is dig a borehole you will be seen as a failure. Either way they will see you as a FAILURE. It doesn’t matter what achievements you’ve attained unless the locals can see tangible achievements they don’t count. Example, they will guilt trip you into owning a home in Kenya even when you don’t want to or need it. Let’s talk more

The US dream is nothing but a dream. When you wake up you realize it was just a dream. Be intentional and don’t chase a dream.

FINALLY, someone being real about the US depressing life. First, about kids… do you feel obligated to raise your kids in the US and give them the US lifestyle and its demands? They want Jordan shoes, swimming, ballet, gymnastics lessons etc. Latest gadgets or toys. I’ve seen we immigrants struggling to live up to the US standards of living. It’s hard and thanks for opening up about it.

Sending love your way. Keep focussed on doing your best for you and the kids. It’s a journey that only you can win as hard as it is. The good thing is that life isn’t static. The kids will grow up and you will get a breather. Run your own race. Your dreams will come true when the time is ripe. Get the professional help you need and keep looking ahead. Get professional support for the kids too. Early intervention is key. Above all pray and keep the faith that it is and it will be well. Your story resonates with many. I included. 🤗

Courage... courage. Just try to take one step at a time

Wen wee week is the only way wen Jesus Pouer code reweel if wee alow Him sou Hes powe and pees can reveel gife Him the opechunety and Hes GRASE

Jesus Christ whating He wont send you n wai

Gifet it to the Lord Jesus and ascke His advise Stay in there Get pees and rest atthe Lord Jesus INBRAS IT KEEP GOING

I hear you mama. ❤ I’m glad you’re getting support through therapy. I never had anxiety until I became a mom here in the US. Things hit you from left and right. It’s not easy…

Your learned communication and media skills from jamhuri are are coming out, so don’t give up. Great insight. My pops would say life is reviewed backwards but lived forward. All the best.

Hello Lucy, I'm not an immigrant however I'm a Black American we have also faced Mutiple challenges, for me personally it stemmed from my family I grew up in a dysfunctional family my uncle was abusive physically to me and my aunt and he was an alcoholic, that affected me growing up even until my adult life it wasn't until I realized it wasn't my fault that I had a family that was dysfunctional, some children have parents who are drug dealers some fathers molest their daughters some fathers are serial killers that isn't our fault just the hand we are dealt in life so I decided to seek counseling also to pray and ask god to help me overcome these obstacles. Also, I learned about Dave Ramsey Peace University 7 baby steps, I am currently on baby step number 6 paying off my home in 2 more years I have no credit card debt or car debt, so I guess what I'm trying to say is stay in your lane live within your means don't worry about what others are doing because not having debt gives me such peace. If you look at the gov't, they are so in debt giving trillions away to Ukraine people who attended Ivy League colleges but can't even do a budget Crazy !!

If you're ever in the LA, CA area come visit Revelation Church. Propher Lovy is from your country. True man of God sent from God.

I feel exactly the same natamani nirudi kenya i live like i used to

After spending 36yrs I went to my original country and am here almost 2yrs I see America is like being in hell for shure.i don't want to come back in that shit hole.

Surely the IRS ain't your friend...they want them dollars only

Thank you for sharing. Also an immigrant came here in my very early 20s, i was naive and ambitious. Now I have 3 children and i am contemplating relocating back to africa because i dont want this anymore.

Sometimes I wish I was born in an African country. As a Black American, it's really hard to find my identity. I am learning more about my family origin. But, sometimes, I wish I can just say I am going back home (to another country). Thanks for sharing! I enjoy understanding things from someone of a different background from me. I have a friend who is from Haiti and seems to feel the same as you. I told my friend, even though we were born different places, we still face the struggle in America.

Raising well adjusted black children in the United States is TOUGH. The negative influences are really fierce. You have to do BATTLE!!! If I had to do it again, I would have sent them to boarding school in the Caribbean. Around grade 11, I would have brought them up for university, but the formative years would have occurred OUTSIDE of the U.S.

God does everything for a reason...so if you're in the USA its not a mistake God Has a glorious purpose for you there...but yes Africa is a goldmine...life is spiritual...and there's a solution...I've DMed you on Instagram...patiently waiting for your feedback

Thank you Kenny. First off, let me just say I love that people are taking their time to leave these long and detailed messages chipping in to the conversation. I truly appreciate that. I like the points you raised - especially having American papers. It would not be wise if you completely abandon the US before you get proper documentation- unless of course you have no intentions of returning. Owning investments back home is important as well. Everyone’s definition of happiness is different. There are very many people who live a minimalist lifestyle and are very happy. Thank you for this- I know it will help many who are struggling with making the decision of whether to leave the US or stay

This is a great conversation. My opinion is - if you have something going there - even if you are just making it - you are better off being there. If you came home you have to have the money - or land - otherwise it is just as bad here. If you managed to buy a home in the US you can sell and bring the money home but buy land and build a home immediately. Sometimes it works for people returning. It's home and even if it's tough you do not feel like a visitor. But sometimes it does not work. There are things that work better in the US. Sense of self is higher - a particular sense of your rights as a human being is more or less respected - except of course - you are black in America! (😂). I have friends who came back after twenty five years with children - and they are doing very well. I have friends who came back - and could not make it - and had to go back to the US - and if they did not leave matters well, they find themselves having to start all over again - on food stamps and social security. Whatever you do, COME BACK WITH a U.S. PASSPORT! You can have duel citizenship now. Don't cut off your road back to the States even if just to visit. And then for those of you in your fifties or approaching - remember much of this is just mid life crises - we are going through the same here - and you will just carry it back with you and find the same. If you are settled in the US, make peace with being there. If you are feeling depressed, home will not take it away. If however - you are struggling - and life has lost its meaning - get your kids to University - they are American now - and then come home. You have one life. You can be rich and miserable. Or on a farm at home, eating your own food - poor - but happy. The question of happiness you have to answer for yourself. But poverty - and I mean where you cannot even eat your own food - is just as depressing here, as it is in the US. I came home and I am very, very happy. I travel freely, with my own money - I feel like I'm a Kenyan - I stand for Kenya - I argue my corner anywhere in the world as though I am a full human being from somewhere on this Earth - and I live and die with our political situation, whatever it is - because I am Kenyan and I fight for it, and it matters and I vote. These things make me happy. I was in the US and the UK for a long time but never got papers and was always an outsider. But. I had land here. Without land things may have turned out very different. Now I'm like my parents (deceased) - and I've sent my daughter abroad for her education - and she can decide her own life. I am happy here. One thing - for people like you Lucy - I'll just generalize - you have integrity and we miss people like you here at home - we used to all be like this twenty years ago - hard working, honest and educted - and our passport was the weightiest Black African Passport abroad. For you all - become American. You are there. If you have papers, you are American. It will alleviate your depression. Be American, and work on being the America you want to see. Be proud of the constitution - and raise your voice where you see America is going wrong - and it is on a long path on the wrong side at the moment - unaware completely of what itself America stands for - freedom, and the rights and dignities of human beings, simply because they are human. America has a high calling. Be that America. Remind them. You are American. You will always be Kenyan - come for holiday, extended - and then go back. You have done well. And you can speak to us from there about what we need to be doing here - to respect people, to respect democracy, to demand Government policy on minimum provisions of health, education, housing, water and access to Law - afterall - we forget - ideally WE are government, looking after ourselves - but here in Kenya we still have a colonised mind-set - and so Government is something other than us - something foreign - to be abused by corrupt politicians and feared by ordinary wanainchi. I think - more than anything - the freedom to be who you are in this world - determines whether or not you are happy. And then we die. Die happy. I've really enjoyed these videos - thank you - and I wish you well.

sunk cost fallacy. people feel theyve invested heavily and are more reluctant to abandon course. even though in some cases up and leaving is more beneficial unfortunately people dont realize atleast not on time that the current costs (not limited to monetary values) far outweigh the benefits of hustling throughout

Hey Lucy, I feel you and hope you get through this. You are tough as it is as you've managed to come this far. Pray for your kids, I undestand your child as I went through that feeling in KENYA myself as a kid, but now I see things differently. Don't give up praying for your children and yourself as God has all the answers. It helps. Thank you for always painting the real US image for us. I truly hope you get through this quickly.

Happy to see you laughing, have a great day

❤❤❤

We humans are emotional beings and it's natural that what people say might get to you. In that case, don't settle in areas too close to your family or you can have a house or settle in other African countries as well and do business there where nobody knows you. I understand and knows the pressure of family members or close ones. Sometimes they will pull you down especially when you're successful. So keep out of sight and live life to the fullest.

Hi how do i cancel an appointment? i was given to a far date

The most important advice as a west african immigrant in the US who spent 15+ years there and moved back to live in East Africa: Invest in your education, get a college degree either you're a blue/white collar. BUT! Do it in skills that are transferrable to the continent. For example, an economics/business degree will get you hired both in the states and in Afric -- the job market is getting up throughout Africa (think big corps relocating and offshoring) altho the salary ranges aren't on par with the US. However, this education will be your parachute when things go wrong while on the continent and managing your businesses you invested in.

Been in Sweden 26 yrs. Healthcare, university and many other things are free. While in America i know a lot of people are in debt because of healthcare. My sister lives in UK and has been a stay at home mom for 3 yrs because daycare is so expensive. I can only Imagine what it costs in the states. With regards to parenting, i think its difficult to raise kids if you are not present. I know a lot of people work 2 jobs (not saying you do) so i don’t know when they have time for their kids. As for comparing how you were raised and how to raise your kids now, i would say forget about how you were raised because thats another time and environment with different norms. I have 3 kids that i am raising here where kids call grown-ups with their first names. As a kid, it was Mrs so and so or Mr so and so. I still struggle with that 😂 Imagine everything else. I guess my advice would be to love your kid and let him or her follow his or hers dream. Be the support when the child falls and don’t be one of those parents who wants to live their dreams through their children🙏🏿

Hi Lucy what state do you reside in?

It's called the American Dream because you gotta be asleep to believe it

Take heart. We're in the same situaton. When it comes to raising kids you i believe we have to adopt the change in current culture. My take is some of our parents came from the country to the city. They worked in the farm during their days as kids. They took looked after the cattel and such but when they moved to they city and started their familis, they never had us leave the same lifestyle as they did. They incorporated just a few things from their past lives as kids. You have to embrass the current cultures incorporated with a bit from your past while growing up, too. All in all, keep on directing your kids in the right direction irrigardless if they are doing the rightbor wrong. Sooner or later they will embrace all your teachings. When it comes to the grind...self employment is they 🗝️ to unlocking the American dream. This is where i am, trying to figure out the right bizz rro start.. Always solidify all these with PRAYERS, FAITH AND HOPE.

America is draining

I have lived in America for over fifty years, but now retired and living in another country, this one thing i heard as a new comer to America, an elderly lady in whose house i was diong some remodeling, the old lady sai to my son who was only about fourteen years, she said to my son,Dont ever get old in America, because it takes back everything that you ever worrked for. People that statement never left my memory bank,and even when i say to people what that elderly lady said to my son, people would always ask me to repeat it, because its true. People you may think you own a lot, but become ill and not work for one year,i guarantee that you would loose everything that you thought you own, medical bills would reveal your true wealth, plan an exit strategy my people, live minimally, plan on returning to your humble beginning in whatever country you came from,you dont need a mansion in your home country,you have no one to impress,live simple in order to enjoy your life,i feel this lady's pain, its a pain of the walls closing in,stay strong and plan an exit strategy, bless you my sister.

Good conversation! Live twitter forum would be ideal so that there is a back and forth! - Healthcare - Financial Security - Safety and security - Lifestyle adjustments (takes 5-7 years to readjust) - Familiy ties- some have already established families in the diaspora These are just the surface variables, and a tip of the iceberg!

I am going back home to Africa in the next few months. Came here as a Teenager and enjoying Africa each time I visit. So will retire in Africa after retiring in a few months and 40 years

Hi Lucy. Don’t worry about what people will say if you wonna go back home, it’s will be your decision and nobody else. ‘Webare planning to go back in a few years but I don’t wonna cut ties here, I can come 2-3 months and work to keep my license. It can be very tough to go back home if you have not prepared. Just start planning now. You look good btw.

There is no economic nor financial freedom in Africa for the most part.

Good work

I have concluded going back home is a personal decision.........how you do it is upto every individual person