Yes... fear of success, because of the trials it will put you through, because you know that you will have to give everything in you to reach it. Leaving the warm bed and venturing into the cold. Those who never had the warm bed are lucky, for the hardest prerequisite to success (leaving the bed, the comfort, the easy option) was done for them by circumstance. Luv you Sophul

Nec minute I've watched 10 minutes. Nice one Sophie

thank you. idk how this video was recommended to me but i struggle so much with decision making. i’m so fucking paralyzed all the time

People do not listen to what they know, they listen to the unexpected, the creative, the new possibilities. If you try to adapt, you will end up alone, but if you are genuine, they will find you, offer their company, and enjoy together with you what you have to offer. 🌹

I would like to add important peer review information about "toxic shame" not found in self-help books: Toxic shame stems from ACoA childhood where we learn that our job is to feel responsible for angry people, that whatever they attack about us is absolute truth, that we have no rights, that we are inept while in the same time angry people are absolutely correct and superior and we must be obedient to their rage. When we experience toxic shame in adulthood - we are actually being transported to childhood of emotional neglect - where we never learned to understand that we are valuable and that we are validated just as we are. Toxic shame in adulthood is emotional flashback - it is regression. But it appears as reality to us. Because we are not being aware that we are experiencing emotional flashback. What does that mean? It means that any kind of logic, CBT analysis - won't work. Amygdala hijacking is going on - our cortex brain is offline - no amount of talking and convincing can help us - because when we suffer from toxic shame - we are being in emotional state of a child. A child does not understand psychology - and scared and abused child in state of abuse cannot learn anything. In fact - any information and logic will appear as abuse and pontification, as toxic shame itself. This is why CBT does not work with toxic shame or any kind of mental illness. Instead of analysis which leads to paralysis - when we struggle with toxic shame - we need to have education about Complex Trauma - so that we snap back to our adult body. So that we know what is going on to us. Without information and education how trauma works - we will go along with emotional flashback. Another term for emotional flashback is Emotional dysregulation. When we are dysregulated - our task is to reach Ventral Vagal (psychological safety). Which means seeking long term normal and healthy people around us and removing toxic ones and learning red flags how to recognize toxic people and corrupt countries/places. In real life - all the things that TRIGGER us into toxic shame (emotional flashback) are really out of our control. WE cannot fix it. We cannot achieve some super magical secret improvement where we are resilient to abuse and psychopaths acting like psychopaths. Psychiatry and CBT are giving us false hope, Salvation Fantasy - that all we need to do is nitpick and discipline and dog train our brain - and then magically we will become strong and nothing bad will ever happen to us ever in life. This is a lie. This is another thing that CBT gets wrong and why psychiatry is bad for mental health: psychiatry cannot help us with real life problems like Gaza, Ukraine, narcissistic abuse, mobbing. Exactly those things that harm our mental health and why we seek psychological help in the first place - CBT can't help us. This is similar to Wizard of Oz and trying to find solutions from magical Oz - which is nothing but a snakeoil salesmen masked as powerful figure that supposedly solves problems. Things that trigger us into toxic shame are totally outside of our control - and we cannot fix it. Psychology can only help us that we do not self abuse ourselves when we are inside ambient outside of our control (such as racism, homophobia, any kind of stigmatization, in-group, bullying). When we go through abuse which is totally outside of our control - our only psychological help - is that we do not self abuse. We will tend to self abuse ourselves (harsh inner critic, negative narrative) due to exposure to narcissistic abuse, ACoA in childhood where we were conditioned to respond to problems in life in self harming way. That is all that psychology can actually help us with toxic shame. Ideas that we discipline our thoughts, that we are brining awareness - won't help us. We need to know how to ground ourselves and snap back to our adult body - and the only way it detailed and through education how complex PTSD works. We cannot heal from toxic shame - it is permanent. Each time when something bad happens to us, when people abuse us - we will be flashbacked to childhood when we experienced chronic neglect and when we were conditioned to believe that we are inferior and unworthy. The damage is done, as Sam Vaknin says. It is misleading to claim that we can heal toxic shame. We can heal trauma - by not abusing ourselves. John Bradshaw book never explained that trauma does not have to be incest and rape - as he defined trauma in his book. Trauma is also exposure to childhood emotional neglect and chronic contempt.

Very enlightening to see your unshaved armpits

Very impressive with your unshaved armpits

Thank you! ❤ You're beautiful human being

You have such a comforting encouraging energy! I love your perspective that we can get pulled by the big dream forwards and out of the pain body ❤

I loved the Abundance mindset reframing when discussing our creative endeavors, so needed in today's toxic competitive shitfight! 🫂😉

I so agree with this about 10 mins short of finishing, but as a mid-late teen this has been something of concerns and it is so nagging n annoying. Its funny because with the whole split of neurodiversity, i myself just came to the conclusion that we are all quite literally operating/acting on masks.

One tip tho. Keeping your mask down might get other people to put it down too. Rn my authenticity looks like a black metallic pearl. Maybe somehow like a cannonball that want's to hit a lot of stuff and smash trough them... (Edit: oh wth, I cried a bit before so my walls are down, but somehow it's like I can feel this marbel..? Gotta go un-meditate) And to elaborate maybe, I feel like my true self want so radical, so big and unknown things to happen, that I would break every damn thin in my current self. I've been taught to not quit and turn around with decisions. To try try and try to make them work even tho they feel like shit. So I'm tied. Tied down with these chains to this place in life.

Muy bien! 😁⭐️💀🎉

I really want to be more authentic. Because I think that sometimes as a people pleaser, I was being fake. I was „nice“, just for people to like me and not because I wanted to genuinely help people out, that don’t really need help and are just using people.

I loved this video💗🌸

I love this! Been working in an environment where I don't exactly fit in. At first I really tried, and even dimmed my own personality to try to make them like me more. But honestly, it was too draining to be someone I wasn't. I can succeed the way I am, and it's okay to not click with everyone! I am loved by my friends and family, and even then I love myself! I lost myself for a while, but this video helped me back on track and be okay with being who I am! I'm tired of hiding who I am so I can be liked. I hate faking being confident and forcing myself to me liked by everyone. I'll do what feels right to me! I also loved the part where the mask comes off!

Strong De-Masking! 🎭

U r so cute 🥹

Thank you for your insight! I’ve been on a journey of building my self love and this has helped me think through my motivations in all the acts I do for myself! ❤

Shhhhh

💙🖤🤍

No black and white thinking. Only mexican and asian.

Thank you for this video

Fantastic points, deeply passionate, good job!

🙌🏼

Great Question Quest! 😊

A lot of insightful information to digest, lately I’ve been working on nurturing my creative side. It has definitely helped me stay more inspired and motivated. Thanks for sharing useful tips

Best Yet! 🫶🏼

🎉❤😊❤🎉

Awesome. Thanks for this.

🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

this was absolutely beautiful, thank you ❤

SB love the honesty

Great sharing Demian

Passionate guy

Fantastic points here Sophie!

Seriously loved this chat!

Amen!

Turn it all around!

Totally it's protective mechanisms to stop perceived failure! Makes sense; we're in our own way!

Fantastic vibe!

:)

Alrighty!

You're really stepping into your power! 🐉 Keep sharing your beautiful gift of presence with this world! 🔮 Yeww! 🪄

More content! 👍 Loving the vulnerable and super real sharing! Pure Fire! 🔥

This is great Sophie, keep sharing your thoughts ✨ so relatable. Much love ! ❤️

Thank you So!