Right on! Seems to be all that we can find is talk therapist who know very little about ASD..Unfortunatly finding someone who iactually is has been next to impossible for us, even out of network or out of pocket.. Hell it took us 17yrs and 9 other privious professionals who all dropped the ball at seeing my husband could be Neurodivergent ..Rather just sent us away with comunication handbooks by "John Gottman" .. 17 years it has taken us to finally get a diagnosis..In fact it was Mark Hutton 's youtube clips that actuallt opened our eyes to it possibly being ASD..and since have test as being just that .Thank you Mark! Were exhausted and now trying to find someone who is familuar with Neurodivergent & Neurotypical couple is turning out to be another huge up hill battle..The mental health community has really dropped the ball with us.

I want to ask questions but fear it will seem I am challenging. Im so confused.

The male partner will also benefit from this bc there will be an actual partnership and peace and contentment in his home. A good woman who feels loved and valued and like you’re trying will do anything for you and wants you to be happy too.

Dear Mark, We have a granddaughter like this. Now 5 and a half. Shalom from Jerusalem, ISRAEL. Lowell

I found this, trying to figure out when to use logic and when to use emotion. And I knew the obvious (such as your/his examples) but I never thought to really combine the two any more or any less than 50 50 I guess, idk but definitely something to think about 🙏

Is it it normal for partners of someone with ASD level 1 to think that THEY themselves are also ASD level 1? Like with narcissistic relationships, the partner wonders if they are the narcissist. @markhutten

Downloadable programs: --- Interpersonal Relationship Skills: eBook and Audio Instruction for Male Partners with ASD- www.neurodiversemarriage.org/2023/09/resolving-neurodiverse-marital-problems.html --- Living with ASD: eBook and Audio Instruction for Neurodiverse Couples- www.livingwithaspergerspartner.com/ Coaching services for autistic male partners: --- Skype Group for ASD Men Struggling in Their Relationship with an NT Spouse: www.adultaspergerschat.com/2020/11/group-for-asd-men-struggling-in-their.html --- Skype Group: ASD Men’s Master Class: www.asdmasterclass.com/2022/02/asd-mens-masterclass.html Coaching services for neurotypical female partners: --- Skype Group for Neurotypical Women Struggling in Their Relationship with an ASD Spouse: www.adultaspergerschat.com/2020/11/group-for-nt-women-struggling-in-their.html --- Skype Group: Recovery from Cassandra Syndrome for Neurotypical Spouses: www.cassandrasyndromerecovery.com/2021/08/recovery-from-emotional-deprivation-for.html Coaching services for the ASD + NT couple: --- Skype Group for Neurodiverse Couples Affected by Autism Spectrum Disorder: www.adultaspergerschat.com/2020/10/mark-hutten-m.html Individual coaching services: --- One-on-One Sessions for Struggling Individuals and Couples Affected by ASD: www.adultaspergerschat.com/2019/07/skype-counseling-for-struggling-couples.html Access to “Members-Only” videos: --- Get your perks here: kzbin.info/door/UZG9TJ9LHwSfmHb4ogQmxAjoin Parenting resources: --- Parenting System that Reduces Problematic Behavior in Children and Teens with ASD Level 1: www.myaspergerschild.com/2019/07/parenting-system-that-reduces.html --- Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: www.high-functioningautism.com/2016/10/parenting-children-and-teens-with-high_9.html --- Discipline for Defiant Teens on the Autism Spectrum: www.myaspergersteen.com/ --- Preventing Meltdowns and Tantrums in Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder: www.autism-meltdowns.com/ --- Launching Adult Children with ASD Level 1: How to Promote Self-Reliance: www.launchingadultchildren.com/ --- Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Kids on the Spectrum: www.social-skills-emotion-management.com/ --- Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: aspergers-mystery.blogspot.com/

How many times have you, someone with ASD, been accused of being a sociopath? Does your NT spouse even know what that is? Well, let's take a look: A sociopath is a term used to describe an individual with antisocial personality disorder. This disorder is characterized by a persistent disregard for the rights of others, as well as a lack of empathy and remorse. Sociopaths often display a pattern of deceitfulness, impulsivity, irritability, and aggressive behavior. They may also have a history of legal problems, dishonesty, and reckless disregard for their own safety and the safety of others. It's important to note that while sociopaths may not always engage in criminal behavior, their inability to form meaningful emotional connections and their manipulative tendencies can have a significant impact on their relationships and interactions with others.

I see it in retrospect, that I added fuel to the raging fire by arguing back trying to make him hear my point. Fatal mistake. Now I know, don’t do that, walk away, or softly respond like you said. Geez this is so hard. Thank you for explaining.

Even My Kids say ‘ I feel like Dad doesn’t like Me’ …. My response ‘ look I ask Myself that all the time’ We have talks about this at times. They’re adults now which makes it easier. I only wish I’d been better educated when I was a young woman. It would’ve made our lives less confusing 💁‍♀️

Bro I got startled at the grocery store today over nothing. I don’t think I have PTSD even though I could point out experiences within each bullet point - but if you posted this because it is linked with Casandra then I wouldn’t be surprised if I do have it. Not trying to self diagnose ever but I’m not fool to the trash my brain has gone through over the years any more either. Feel like the ghost rider driving my truck lately lol just a skeleton not looking left or right only dead ahead my mission is clear I am determined.. hmm

Good info. Thank you.

Long before I realised he was potentially Aspie, I couldnt wrap my head around why i always forgave his innocence. Little did I realise that the innocence I saw was actually potentially a different brain.

Yes! And say thank you when she gives you a nice compliment or hands you the salt. Simple.

It hit me the other day that being angry at an autistic person for not trying harder to see your feelings is like being angry at a colorblind person for not trying harder to help you pick out a house paint. He's had the disorder a long time and he probably doesn't want to spend the day trying to do something he can't do.

My husband has a lot of autistic traits but highly intelligent is not one of them. Can someone have low IQ and be autistic as well?

Yeah the Dr ego is butt hurt easy when somone else has an opinion. Some lay people have really good insight. Bet you'll never admit that tho.

Just because someone displays narcissistic behavior does not mean they are narcissistic

Add control to the mix and you get 4 Cs.

Can’t listen to video because of sound of voice

Downloadable programs: --- Interpersonal Relationship Skills: eBook and Audio Instruction for Male Partners with ASD- www.neurodiversemarriage.org/2023/09/resolving-neurodiverse-marital-problems.html --- Living with ASD: eBook and Audio Instruction for Neurodiverse Couples- www.livingwithaspergerspartner.com/ Coaching services for autistic male partners: --- Skype Group for ASD Men Struggling in Their Relationship with an NT Spouse: www.adultaspergerschat.com/2020/11/group-for-asd-men-struggling-in-their.html --- Skype Group: ASD Men’s Master Class: www.asdmasterclass.com/2022/02/asd-mens-masterclass.html Coaching services for neurotypical female partners: --- Skype Group for Neurotypical Women Struggling in Their Relationship with an ASD Spouse: www.adultaspergerschat.com/2020/11/group-for-nt-women-struggling-in-their.html --- Skype Group: Recovery from Cassandra Syndrome for Neurotypical Spouses: www.cassandrasyndromerecovery.com/2021/08/recovery-from-emotional-deprivation-for.html Coaching services for the ASD + NT couple: --- Skype Group for Neurodiverse Couples Affected by Autism Spectrum Disorder: www.adultaspergerschat.com/2020/10/mark-hutten-m.html Individual coaching services: --- One-on-One Sessions for Struggling Individuals and Couples Affected by ASD: www.adultaspergerschat.com/2019/07/skype-counseling-for-struggling-couples.html Access to “Members-Only” videos: --- Get your perks here: kzbin.info/door/UZG9TJ9LHwSfmHb4ogQmxAjoin Parenting resources: --- Parenting System that Reduces Problematic Behavior in Children and Teens with ASD Level 1: www.myaspergerschild.com/2019/07/parenting-system-that-reduces.html --- Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: www.high-functioningautism.com/2016/10/parenting-children-and-teens-with-high_9.html --- Discipline for Defiant Teens on the Autism Spectrum: www.myaspergersteen.com/ --- Preventing Meltdowns and Tantrums in Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder: www.autism-meltdowns.com/ --- Launching Adult Children with ASD Level 1: How to Promote Self-Reliance: www.launchingadultchildren.com/ --- Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Kids on the Spectrum: www.social-skills-emotion-management.com/ --- Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: aspergers-mystery.blogspot.com/

The end got me 😅

Good answer!!😂

Downloadable programs: --- Interpersonal Relationship Skills: eBook and Audio Instruction for Male Partners with ASD- www.neurodiversemarriage.org/2023/09/resolving-neurodiverse-marital-problems.html --- Living with ASD: eBook and Audio Instruction for Neurodiverse Couples- www.livingwithaspergerspartner.com/ Coaching services for autistic male partners: --- Skype Group for ASD Men Struggling in Their Relationship with an NT Spouse: www.adultaspergerschat.com/2020/11/group-for-asd-men-struggling-in-their.html --- Skype Group: ASD Men’s Master Class: www.asdmasterclass.com/2022/02/asd-mens-masterclass.html Coaching services for neurotypical female partners: --- Skype Group for Neurotypical Women Struggling in Their Relationship with an ASD Spouse: www.adultaspergerschat.com/2020/11/group-for-nt-women-struggling-in-their.html --- Skype Group: Recovery from Cassandra Syndrome for Neurotypical Spouses: www.cassandrasyndromerecovery.com/2021/08/recovery-from-emotional-deprivation-for.html Coaching services for the ASD + NT couple: --- Skype Group for Neurodiverse Couples Affected by Autism Spectrum Disorder: www.adultaspergerschat.com/2020/10/mark-hutten-m.html Individual coaching services: --- One-on-One Sessions for Struggling Individuals and Couples Affected by ASD: www.adultaspergerschat.com/2019/07/skype-counseling-for-struggling-couples.html Access to “Members-Only” videos: --- Get your perks here: kzbin.info/door/UZG9TJ9LHwSfmHb4ogQmxAjoin

Dunning-Krüger at work, right there…😂

As somebody with aspergers syndrome i get enough of people telling me i use autism as a crutch from mostly neurotypical people and family members and people who have no idea how emotionally difficult it is to even make eye contact and then to be crushed when someone i express intrest in casually mentions having a boyfriend as though it comes naturally to them. It REALLY hurt when someone mentioned me not being that special just bwcause i had autism because it was nothing new which they must have been neurotypical obviously so why would i want someone demanding i make changes to make them happy when they barely put in the effort to understand me and do the same?

I really enjoy your videos!!! ❤

I was pretty much the only one that vacuumed growing up and I didn't like how others vacuumed because they missed spots and around the baseboards so I still do the vacuuming LoL And im somewhat organized and clean I still don't know where to put all of my womans stuff And if she moves my things i get a little irritated and am liking hunny where is this where is that why you move my stuff Like i was saying somewhat organized but it probably still looks a little cluttered at the same time but I know where it's at...

I don't like getting loud and into name calling. I don't like being called names so I don't do it either. It gets you nowhere being mean to each other. I've said some things that I wasn't thinking about that might have been somewhat hurtful just by not being considerate of what was going on at the moment. I have trouble when it’s appropriate to speak or when someone needs quiet. So that can make her upset also some boundary issues. Conversation and social cues Pretty much what defines an inconsiderate person I just looked up and read is like asd But I try to not get like that Sometimes i do talk about myself and get preoccupied by myself and that isn't nice for her if I get stuck in that so try harder to communicate and think of her and include her thoughts

The importance of being authentic in relationships cannot be overstated. When we are authentic, we are true to ourselves and others, which allows for genuine connection, trust, and understanding between individuals. Authenticity in relationships means being genuine, transparent, and honest in our interactions. It involves expressing our true thoughts, feelings, and values, and being open to understanding and accepting the same from others. This level of authenticity paves the way for deeper connections, mutual respect, and the building of strong, meaningful relationships.

Downloadable programs: --- Interpersonal Relationship Skills: eBook and Audio Instruction for Male Partners with ASD- www.neurodiversemarriage.org/2023/09/resolving-neurodiverse-marital-problems.html --- Living with ASD: eBook and Audio Instruction for Neurodiverse Couples- www.livingwithaspergerspartner.com/ Coaching services for autistic male partners: --- Skype Group for ASD Men Struggling in Their Relationship with an NT Spouse: www.adultaspergerschat.com/2020/11/group-for-asd-men-struggling-in-their.html --- Skype Group: ASD Men’s Master Class: www.asdmasterclass.com/2022/02/asd-mens-masterclass.html Coaching services for neurotypical female partners: --- Skype Group for Neurotypical Women Struggling in Their Relationship with an ASD Spouse: www.adultaspergerschat.com/2020/11/group-for-nt-women-struggling-in-their.html --- Skype Group: Recovery from Cassandra Syndrome for Neurotypical Spouses: www.cassandrasyndromerecovery.com/2021/08/recovery-from-emotional-deprivation-for.html Coaching services for the ASD + NT couple: --- Skype Group for Neurodiverse Couples Affected by Autism Spectrum Disorder: www.adultaspergerschat.com/2020/10/mark-hutten-m.html Individual coaching services: --- One-on-One Sessions for Struggling Individuals and Couples Affected by ASD: www.adultaspergerschat.com/2019/07/skype-counseling-for-struggling-couples.html Access to “Members-Only” videos: --- Get your perks here: kzbin.info/door/UZG9TJ9LHwSfmHb4ogQmxAjoin Parenting resources: --- Parenting System that Reduces Problematic Behavior in Children and Teens with ASD Level 1: www.myaspergerschild.com/2019/07/parenting-system-that-reduces.html --- Parenting Children and Teens with High-Functioning Autism: www.high-functioningautism.com/2016/10/parenting-children-and-teens-with-high_9.html --- Discipline for Defiant Teens on the Autism Spectrum: www.myaspergersteen.com/ --- Preventing Meltdowns and Tantrums in Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder: www.autism-meltdowns.com/ --- Launching Adult Children with ASD Level 1: How to Promote Self-Reliance: www.launchingadultchildren.com/ --- Teaching Social Skills and Emotion Management to Kids on the Spectrum: www.social-skills-emotion-management.com/ --- Unraveling The Mystery Behind Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism: aspergers-mystery.blogspot.com/

I WAS ABOUT TO SAY THE SAME THING 😂 The people who throw that word around loosely are typically the narcissist from my point of view lol

Hey, who needs med school or years it takes to get a psychology degree if you have WiFi!? I hate armchair doctors and psychs. I am a psychologist and my friend is always trying to get me to diagnose people based on her own descriptions. People I’ve never met and goes on Facebook to find sayings that match these people. She doesn’t seem to grasp it takes sitting down with someone over a period of sessions to get an understanding of whether they even have a mental illness or personality disorder. Even being somewhat trained in autism, had everyone telling me I was autistic because they had relatives who were and even after my official formal diagnosis, I still question it. Narcissism is thrown around like an “uber cool” term for scorned Karen’s to call their exes or husbands when they don’t cater to their every demand.

And it’s always directly after they tell you how you think or feel and will not allow you to explain their misunderstanding

--- www.asdrelationshipsolutions.com Autism and narcissism are two distinct conditions with differing characteristics. Autism is a complex neurodevelopmental disorder that significantly impacts social interaction, communication, and behavior. Individuals with autism may experience challenges in understanding social cues, engaging in repetitive behaviors, and exhibiting heightened sensitivities to sensory stimuli. In contrast, narcissism is a personality disorder characterized by an inflated sense of self-importance, a lack of empathy, and an insatiable need for admiration and validation. Those with narcissistic traits often display an exaggerated perception of their own abilities, a constant craving for attention, and a tendency to exploit others for personal gain. Though both conditions can affect social interactions, it is crucial to recognize their distinct origins and manifestations. Understanding these differences can help in providing appropriate support and interventions for individuals affected by these conditions.

I have tried this approach many times. Unfortunately, the response is often "Just say it now" and when I say it, I get "Yuo always bring things up when I'm already pissed off about something". So, I can't win with it.

Any resources for ADHD (F) and ASD (M) relationships? Thanks!

I love my partner of 7 years dearly. I love all the things he does, mostly. The cute little routines, the way he is so black and white, the sweetness of him. I value his routines and all his ways. After years I learned to see the beautiful side to it and appreciate his kind and sweet character. BUT....... I just feel abit dead. Like, a huge part of me has to die in order for him to be happy and peaceful. Like I have to be good and quite, adhere to his routines and just be nice and quiet and polite, not too noisey, not too exciteable, not too emotional, not too sexual.... etc etc otherwise it overwhelms him. So over the years we have found our peaceful spot. Where he does his thing, and I just accept. No intimacy for 5 years but I have accepted that. My personality changed. I became more understanding, gentle, sensible and quiet, but the fun, happy and excitable part kind of faded as it had to.... now I’m questioning if I can go on..... it’s starting to become unbearable. This part of me that has died, the true happy me. I miss her. She comes out sometimes, but only in small doses. I’m so tired of having to hold back in wanting intimacy, cuddles and kisses and fun and playfulness..... 😢

I'm so glad he doesn't sugar coat the truth about these relationships and how they affect the neurotypical partner.

Hell that's not even an NT thing, that's just common courtesy

Yes!! I've been working on this with my husband and he's getting better at it. But he also works over so often that I'm shocked when he's home "early" (on time lol)

😂 I am so used to my ASD husband never checking in at all that I find it weird when my friends spouces call them "just to talk" or check in. It's weird. Lol! It would be nice to know that when dinner is ready at 6:00, it will be sitting for another hour or we will be eating without him. But... I guess that's hard.

--- www.asdrelationshipsolutions.com

I think I use the old hurtful memories as my personal reminder that he can’t and won’t get “it” not matter how much I may need or want that from him.

Im dating a woman now with ASD. What a rollercoaster

Ive been following you for a year now. Just wondering, if autistic people have an emotional inteligens of a 14 year old. How do they know the depth of their feelings? And when they are in love or just liking someone..

nope when it turns violent when they are mind blind to someone's intentions, its a wrap!

To all those that are still with the person you are dealing with - even though they may be all you have- as you are probably isolated at this point (all part of the game), I caution you not to look to them for acceptance or validation for what you do- say, your writing as you may feel temped to share it- they will not ‘get it’ and if they do- they will not give you that understanding you’re looking for- which may send you back to more ‘hurt’ feelings and/or isolation- try not to lean on them for your worth or even those small bits of understanding/acceptance- it is the continuation of the collection of power that someone who doesn’t understand emotions does - maybe unaware- to manipulate the relationship.

And it is totally grieving, makes so much sense, it’s complicated though. He’s not coming back, that’s hard to accept especially when I see his ghost every day in my house. Maybe one day he can at least be a friendly ghost… Thank you for this advice. I am really struggling and that helped a lot, helped me “get it.”

--- www.cassandrasyndromerecovery.com/ Robin's story: "As I sat alone at the kitchen table, I couldn't help but notice the way the morning sunlight filtered through the window, casting a warm glow on the worn wooden surface. The silence in the house felt suffocating, each tick of the clock echoing in the stillness. It wasn't always like this. When we first got married, I felt like my husband and I were a team, facing the world together. But as the years went by, something changed. We grew apart, and it felt like I was living with a stranger. I tried to reach out to him, to bridge the gap that seemed to be widening between us, but it was like talking to a wall. He was physically present, but emotionally distant. I longed for the deep conversations we used to have, for the laughter that had once filled our home. I found myself yearning for connection, for someone who truly understood me. But the thought of confiding in someone else felt like a betrayal. I was torn between the loneliness of staying in a hollow marriage and the guilt of seeking companionship elsewhere. As I looked at the empty chair across from me, I couldn't shake off the feeling of isolation. I wondered if he felt it too, or if I was the only one struggling in this marriage. I wanted to believe that we could find our way back to each other, but the fear of being alone in my marriage was becoming harder to ignore."