I think the most insightful statement among many insightful statements by Antoinette which resonated most to me was that though an introvert may enjoy deep conversations they likely may not reveal personal details about themselves. Subscribed~

Great video! God bless you!

I go to this small gathering twice a year and the first time he was there, this huge narcissist shows up at dinner with a birthday cake...for HIMSELF! I was shocked at the gall of someone expecting 40 strangers to sing "happy birthday" to himself, but I have to admit, to a certain extent I admired it too!

There's a certain species of person that has almost a kind of...Deafness, where it seems like they can't hear what you are saying unless they..."plug in" by laying a hand on your arm! In Introvertese, this triggers the "INTRUDER ALERT" alarm!

Hi ma'am

Introvert Perspective: "Body language to avoid when you don't want people to talk to you".

All of this is true. I can't stand unnecessary drama, and nothing angers me more than when someone tries to force me to make an immediate decision.

"What good is sitting Alone in your room? Come hear the music play! Life is a cabaret, old chum…" Now hold on there! It depends on the music! Sometimes sitting alone in your room really IS better!

"You don't reveal a lot about yourself, but I'm figuring you out!"

"My distant cousin (whom you have NEVER met) is getting married next month. WE are invited!"

The common misperception about introverts is we're socially awkward and have trouble with interactions. We can, but constant interaction is draining and we periodically need to recharge. As for the personality types: Drama: Just don't care, want to avoid gossip, backbiting, or just someone's need for attention Boundaries: This can be hard for some people to understand, or make them think you don't want to be their friend, but you honestly have to build up to going out and doing things. This is a perpetual pain point, as you don't want that but also get very stressed trying to go along. Intrusive: Oversharing, other times wanting to be your pal/buddy because they want someone and see you keeping to yourself. Had a very ugly episode with at work several years with someone who may have been autistic and didn't want to accept a few conversations about hobbies didn't mean we were best friends and I didn't want him getting into my cubicle all the time or snooping what I was doing on my computer. Pushy or Aggressive: This is a mixed bag. Big decisions about job or life, if you have to make it you can. It's not being indecisive, it is the salesman talk when for the most part you already know the pitch and the ending. In work it's sometimes flipped, "in meetings you always get to the point." Some people I think honestly get a buzz from small talk and rely on that with customers--who cares if we don't remember what we agreed on, they felt good about it. Shallow: Yes, some people tend to enjoy conversations about nothing as it seems to make them feel connected but also not expose themselves. We'd prefer an emotional or meaningful interaction or nothing. Non-Stop Talking: Compulsive talkers are probably the hardest for me to deal with. Just....stop. I think it's either an insecurity problem--never wanting any dead space, but also not separating their inner and outer world. So you have to hear every thought running through their head while your eyes glaze over. One thing I've found is singing and music doesn't faze me at all, but I have to focus to keep up with conversations, speeches, and TV shows, which is very hard when someone keeps running their mouth interrupting it. Critical of being an introvert: As a youth, especially a male, it was very hard. Being called a queer, wimp, a whole host of things because people clued in on your introversion and thought it fun to pick on you. I grew up in the South with a lot of blunt Appalachians, who took my quiet as being aloof or thinking I was better than them--in high school and college I spent most of my free time at the library. Dating was also difficult--your idea of a fulfilling life is enough money to live comfortably and a happy routine, not big houses or cars. But when you do get emotionally invested in someone it's sincere. As you get older and have more life experience you realize that while you may not want to hear what everyone is thinking, they don't know what you're thinking either, and you need to say enough so they don't see you as this creepy strange person who never talks. You also get better at diffusing or dissuading situations where someone wants to start a problem with you. I can add, not a gift but an insight to being an introvert. A lot of extrovert's social bluster and emotional tactility goes right over our heads, we don't see what they tell us, just what's there. And several times now I'd get a bad feeling about someone and people would wonder why I didn't like them or interact with them.....only to later have their star fall and it come out they were bad people, to the point a couple of them went to prison on serious charges.

"You're very quiet!"

"Since we're all new here, let's break up into groups."

"I'm going to take a walk." "I'll come with you!"

"You're sitting here all by yourself!" "...yeahh?"

These people make me switch on 'combat mode'.

Connecting with people on a deeper level often times feels like solving a complicated crossword puzzle. They tend to stay stuck in that small talk shallow phase. And the ones who talk way too much, for the most part they don't say anything meaningful. The voice of those types can be annoying to listen too. Layers upon layers of noise. Please be quiet for a minute.

These are absolutely on point!

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Thanks, Antoinette -- nicely explained

At work phonecalls became my number 1 source of stress and frustration for the following reasons : - the call interrupts me in the middle of something - I feel the person waits for me and it makes me feel pressure from it - Sometimes the subject could've been dealt with in a few seconds in a quick message or email - it leaves no trace and I tend to forget stuff said over the phone. Some people at my job have a higher preference for phonecalls so they tend to abuse my availability even tho I told them to message me if they need so now I greatly reduced my stress and mental load by ignoring calls on purpose and pretending to have a meeting it works like a charm. On my office phone there is an option for incoming calls names "ignore" which mutes the ringing but doesn't end the call so I can trick the person into thinking I was busy but when they message me I instantly answer with a really precise reply so well that they usually don't need to ask questions afterward. The most infiuriating calls are the one that are just before taking a break (like mid morning or mid afternoon coffee break with coworkers or just before the lunch break). I either ignore or just say that I have a meeting coming up. Sometimes I wish I could display a big middle finger emote on the person's phone screen with a big "NO" marked

(from DK) I am not introvert, but I hate phonecalls, because I can´t sea/read The people 🧐

Just got home from one of those parties... Hated every minute of it and did NOT want to be there. Had no choice though as was strongle 'advised' by my partner to go, it was one of their colleague's birthday party - I've never met even before but they heard a lot about me through my partner apparently. Firstly I wasn't told the full details: only found out that it is not a dinner like celebration but a booked out hired venue in the middle of nowhere we had to be taken by partner's friends' car (not easy to escape or just come home if I wanted I thought!). Also it turned out to be a 70-80s themed disco party well we didn't wear any costumes anyway. Arrived, had a drink, made the small talk but lost voice after about 40 minutes as the bloody music was so loud it was very annoying. Then was invited for dancing but I didn't feel like it so rejected and just stayed at the table. I don't really feel comfortable around these people, only saw them in party setting usually when they drink lots and therefore very little meaningful conversations are made. I don't feel the urge to build a connection with them either, they're not my colleagues and a couple of them I don't necessarily symphatise with either. So when the dancing started my partner joined the stage and I was just sitting there, wanting to go home already, really triggering my overthinking too: argh everyone must think I'm such a lemon. But why am I feeling this way and so on so fourth in my head... Also then the masking became too exhausting and remembered that I can be who I want to be so why pretend I'm so cool and having the time of my life when in fact the opposite is true... Went on my phone to avoid looking just purely miserable. To my luck I think the friend who gave us the ride could sense my struggle/may have had experience with introverts and she kindly offered that she's happy to leave by the way whenever me and my partner wants to. Said to her let's wait for the cake cutting then probably we can go. A few times I was invited to join the dancefloor by these other colleagues of my partner but said I'm tired so I'm OK and stayed at the table. I guess in my head was still spinning around that I don't even know these people to be fair, I don't enjoy this situation at all and if I don't feel like joining then why join just because of peer pressure and then make a fool of myself or get judged on how I can dance.. Complete nightmare basically. Finally we were ready to leave and got home. Sat down with partner as they could tell I was uncomfortable and we talked through everything. They understand I feel I was dragged into going and that it is what it is, it's my childhood trauma potentially that causes my social anxiety and introvertedness as otherwise I have no issue one to one, I'm someone who worked in hospitality serving guests in five star hotels and doing so with a smile on my face but when it comes to public speaking/interaction with a crowd/many people AND unknown/less favoured/not very connected people then I really really struggle. Therefore watching your 6 tips, some I agree with and some I disagree: such as the masking advice. Because the other thing is why is it me that needs to put the effort in? If I see a shy person I always try to comfort them by initiating the conversation or the small talk but I hardly ever get that support even if I try (avoid going on the phone, etc.) so in the end I just get too tiried to bother caring much about it,

I'm extremely extrovert outside of my home, social settings etc. and extremely introvert inside my home. Would that be considered ambivert? There's no middle, it's like all the way on each end of the spectrum depending on if I'm at home or not.

We LOVE other people. Our colleagues (including subordinates) are people that we respect and like working with. Just because we need a lot of time to ourselves doesn't mean that we don't want to spend the time to work with you and develop our professional relationship. "Public" speaking can be very intimidating, especially if it's to strangers, or it can be almost nothing if it's over a walkie to coworkers (or vice versa - I tend to have a stammer over a walkie that I don't have in-person). Thank you for representing us thoughtfully!

First one is also big with women.

Got to see your vid because my workmates are invalidating my claim that i am an introvert because i am talkative in the office. I feel offended because i hate it when people tend to act like they know me 100% and they tend to go overboard with their expectation so I tend to drain my social battery faster.

I work together with my aunt and she's exactly like this. Honestly, i can't take it anymore. Sometimes we are adressing to patients and she always finds a way to make everything about her. Once, a patience was talking about her cancer and she find a way to bring everything about her and how she was afraid of getting cancer and stuff. Honestly, It's so annoying that ouside of work, i just ignore and run away from her. She's always asking me favors too, imagine how it is when someone cannot see you without asking you something.

Early on, I listened to this engaging woman speaker as she taught, 'The ART of LISTENING'. One technique is to have a pen and paper handy, so when an idea pops into your brain, you can quickly write it down. That way, you don't 'lose' your thought, and can continue to Really Listen to what someone else is saying - which respects, and benefits, both parties. Stephen Covey said, “The biggest communication problem is that we do not listen to understand. We listen to reply.” Ponder that! 🙂

More great nuggets!

As a Leo..... deal with it!! 😅

We are just learning the truth about the society we all live in today. We all look for love in our hearts, that’s natural. We all need a reason to explain why life exists. For what reason? It’s. hard, because it’s made hard. Life is love. There is a severe lack of it. 1 Corinthians 13 seems to me like the best explanation.

I’m an Ambivert and I hate small talk too. I prefer deep conversations.

Great tips Antoinette. Thank you and Happy New Year!

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I'm gonna start eye rolling EVERYBODY! And for no reason, it's going to be fun!

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Great video

4) find relatable topics to talk about 5) have a long one to one conversation not small talk

Wow, this is so spot on, specially number 4 and 5. In the restaurant, the bar, the movie theater, the cafe, the mall, a long walk, on the train, being alone just feels better. I feel like when I'm alone I get to be myself. Around people I might feel like I'm acting out a script. It's worst if they have a long social battery that never seems to die out. I can't match that energy.

Totally true. I have a smile on my face every time you announce a secret and explain what is happening in our head. Personally I still don't like invitations. I just want everybody to leave me alone 🥲 It's really nice to know when someone likes you though, i just not interested in all those meaningless social events because people cannot be trusted and i just fear them. Apart from that people are used to drink as fun and I despite alcohol so one more point to being a black sheep. In a long run I understand that i'm gonna need to "lick my wounds" and recover for some time after any meeting and besides I will feel sad for being sad. I just feel I don't fit. Like you are the last of your kind. Prefer not to bring this thought up in my mind.

Totally different to Ireland

today i was waiting infront of the general physicians building, because the place was absolutely CRAMPED. i saw some grandpa getting out of his car and when i nodded to him to greet him, he just threw hatred towards me with his face. after he went into his apartment i realized he didnt shut the car door. i kept watching the car but since he didnt return in 10 minutes i decided to close his stupid door, even though he was a total bit**. 15 years single, cheated on twice, recently got laid off from a job i held for 12 years, fell into severe depression - i will be that man in 30 years maybe 10 being kind is absolutely useless

Thank you!!❤

Kind!

Such a beautiful and thought-provoking video! 🌟 It’s a powerful reminder that kindness often carries more weight than winning an argument. The world could use more of this message. Thank you for spreading positivity and wisdom! 🙌💛

Yes, I learned to just let'em have it. Escalating the debate for what. Whether we debate politics, religion, sports, Merry Christmas or Happy holiday. Either way, life as we know it goes on.

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You didn’t talk about the consequences

This was very helpful! Thank you