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@tomfaulkner2055
@tomfaulkner2055 2 күн бұрын
A very logical and recognisable explanation of BSS. Tends to get subsumed by other problems so its good to pin it down.
@omygod9062
@omygod9062 13 күн бұрын
Children need safety and familiarity and the physical response to affection and love, if lucky.
@streaming5332
@streaming5332 2 ай бұрын
I lived at home and it was very damaging. I always thought the boarders at my school had it good. No punitive mother hanging around. Also the boarders made lifelong friends with other boarders.
@peterloup2302
@peterloup2302 2 ай бұрын
Anyone would think you are suggesting they have been sent to prison !! They are not alone and are surrounded by similar children. Life today in schools is quite different, weekly boarding also helps with fees. Please stop calling them prisons - state pupils wear uniform!! Many boarding schools are now co-ed and girls develop more quickly than boys. Another factor which affects the number of children going to a Boarding School these days is a result of both parents having careers - possibly to be able to pay the school fees!!
@tintingengen5601
@tintingengen5601 3 ай бұрын
I now say that I was in an orphanage with well meaning guardians. There from 8-12 - prep school.
@chowmein12
@chowmein12 3 ай бұрын
what a horendous horrendous human
@pappamojovcheroes2442
@pappamojovcheroes2442 3 ай бұрын
Didn't she lecture on whiteness being a problem of our time? 3 middle class people preaching again
@orchideeimperiale9670
@orchideeimperiale9670 3 ай бұрын
you are mentally derailed amoral hypocrites you destroyed peoples life
@chrisyemenijian6039
@chrisyemenijian6039 4 ай бұрын
bss stays with you forever.. will hunt you down in everywhere in good days or bad, lucky or unlucky, happy or sad, the list goes on.. my journey began with age of 2 until teenager years. I have given up on many things in life but i still have my jesus in faith.. i remember crying every single day, waiting for my mother.. there is no cure and there is no peace with you or with your family, it leaves in a way of saying like a moment of your Immune is down you get sick from something and thats you, it is always inside you. i have heard many of your comments, stories and journey. Mine is totally similar but in a different system which it it was a orphanage, kids who didnt have mother or father or neither but yet i had both. the punishments on daily basis, the work, the way of living and nutrition. i have escaped almost everytime but yet, the policeman, fire fighters, teachers, rescue mission and neighbors always found me eventually... i hated it.. my prayers from God were never answered that was more sad to me than everything else that was ongoing. I beat every kid in the school younger and older, teachers, co workers, bichops, priests, archbishops and many more due to my anger management. i was angry almost everyday that how my mother and father would do this to me and leave me here. it was a prison cell but then i saw and met table tennis and that became my one way ticket out of it. p,s, no medications or therapies would and will ever help this. sociology 101 mother and her son/daughter relationship then to the world.
@Me_ThatsWho
@Me_ThatsWho 6 ай бұрын
This is brilliant. Thank you !
@Youve-Got-This
@Youve-Got-This 6 ай бұрын
Very interesting insights
@marcusevans2541
@marcusevans2541 7 ай бұрын
Thanks to the @BritPsyFound for having me and posting this video on my first book ‘Making Room for Madness in Mental Health' @BritPsyCouncil @BPApsychUK @theIoPA @rcpsych
@furiousfolly
@furiousfolly 8 ай бұрын
I was sent to boarding school as a young girl just turned 8, it was 1969. My older brother was with me but we were segregated almost immediately. Something fractured inside me that day and kept on breaking. Joy Schaverian describes the trauma brilliantly and succinctly. I put it down to my own resilience and deep love of my partner , and the joy of 3 grown up children that I do not think about the horror and fear of it all every day, not every day.We lived in Borneo so because of costs I only saw my parents twice a year, which meant visiting expats we were farmed ut to other people or had the crushing shame of behind left in the dining hall when everyone else had gone. My parents are still alive at 95 and have never been open to talking about what it did to me. I love them but I hate them so much too. They adopted us soon after birth, why do that just to send your children away? Never understood or forgave that one. My older brother died in a car crash at age 21 , he ran away 3 times with nowhere to go. I never knew why but I wonder now. I would have walked away from my parents then if he had not died but I am not an unkind person and my younger brother was busy building his own brick wall around himself so I stayed not realising the feeling I had of drowning inside in future years was my childhood. I have been to hours and hours of therapy, it helps at the time - to dampen it all down a bit , but its always there and it always comes back.To anyone out there who feels like me, and I know there are many, even though you feel alone in your grief, betrayal and rage - you are not, I hope that helps a little.
@yoya4766
@yoya4766 8 ай бұрын
The woman on the left is so awful I'd never have confidence in her. Too school teacherish.
@TreadLightly777
@TreadLightly777 3 ай бұрын
she's a really bad person
@yoya4766
@yoya4766 8 ай бұрын
I can't imagine who would choose Jungian therapy. Maybe navel gazing idle rich? I don't think it's practical, but a self indulgent trip.
@LouiseHernandez-xd1xh
@LouiseHernandez-xd1xh 9 ай бұрын
Not females ladies girls no vaginas sexual reproduction organs no sperm no dad's friends or family are not human or have children or White skin tag wannabes Black females ladies girls 👭 women 🚺 blue balls no vocabulary words or skin tag wannabes men 🚹 no mercy no father's in-laws siblings were born or skin tag wannabes Jeff Goldberg Garbage Dumpsters white skin tag wannabes me too..Disease is rampant in the ignorant 2 face Black females ladies girls no gender or married 👰 or in-laws siblings were born or existed no property owners or use MY LANDLORD STATUS GLOBE 🌐 utilities are cellular phones Disease and giving lethal harshest chemicals to Genocidal lesions 💡 for malicious malignant parasites forged my illegal name to endorse liars is the Armageddon Holocaust is a abomination to assimilate the use MY LANDLORD STATUS GLOBE 🌐..
@rubyerinl4287
@rubyerinl4287 9 ай бұрын
these people seem like the absolute worst human beings on the planet
@RobWalker1
@RobWalker1 10 ай бұрын
Really helpful to help me think about the route I might want to take, thank you!
@ejenkins4711
@ejenkins4711 Жыл бұрын
In my humble opinion jung built the engine in his mind to dive beyond freud. Freud pushed the rule but forgot about how to measure
@lruss5050
@lruss5050 Жыл бұрын
We don’t have many boarding schools in Canada. The concept is foreign to most of us. It’s endlessly fascinating as a fictional world!
@christianayme7316
@christianayme7316 9 ай бұрын
Absolutely.
@kunalsingh7732
@kunalsingh7732 Жыл бұрын
I was sent to a "not so privileged" boarding school at the age of 8 and it has some upsides in terms of tweaking your surviving skills to the max but the downside is that now you are a dead man walking with no soul because you disassociate yourself for so long as a kid to avoid the pain of the sheer trauma that you cant feel anything anymore. Its sad.
@zenzeleluckymtshali8433
@zenzeleluckymtshali8433 Жыл бұрын
if i was your husband...i dont know...
@maddielakeland5314
@maddielakeland5314 2 ай бұрын
What a bizarre and unnecessary comment
@zenzeleluckymtshali8433
@zenzeleluckymtshali8433 Жыл бұрын
CAN I BRING MY TOOL BOX ON A SCHEDULED COVID 19 PROTOCOL IN A EXPLAINED SIGHTING OF A DEGREE PERSON IN A ROOM FULL OF PEOPLE LESS THAN YOUR CEILING UNDERSTANDING..PROPABILTY IN A TRAIN full of japannese people or a gardener turneed butler home sitter if family is abroad in finance today shortages not food but a brain power push..yes that happened not rare we were alone like in jack nicholson movie with that italian lady no middle..and i was 41yrs as o 28*-24yrs or 22 yrs from 21yrs.well if i was you i wont make a slave story and nbecome doctor for covid19 with a// www target crd in america like a movie can close shops as on today sceeening in new york as in my movie back to the future...you tube youre not a brave doctor..
@bigcrackerpants
@bigcrackerpants Жыл бұрын
I went to boarding school from 7 years old. I'm 46 now. I've had therapy since i was 30 but am only just beginning feel settled and understand the impact the trauma of boarding school had on my development and ability to relate to others. Thank you Joy, your work has really helped me.
@summerlake356
@summerlake356 Жыл бұрын
Ex boarding school pupil here... Sweden. I feel like I got away from a very difficult home situation. Would it have been better to stay? Not sure! I was 12, I guess it's more harmful at a younger age. But it changed my personality for life.
@izzymeadows1748
@izzymeadows1748 Жыл бұрын
My boy went to boarding school and is in therapy for boarding school syndrome. It plays havoc with his ability to maintain and connect in relationships. He’s avoidant in many ways and because of the captivity craves his freedom and defo puts friends before family. He struggles with deep connections with female but wants them. He shuts down easily and has to fill his time constantly
@DPK12
@DPK12 Жыл бұрын
This is shocking. The language has not changed in 40 years. White middle class and insulting to any service user.
@ShesABitBored
@ShesABitBored Жыл бұрын
I went to boarding school from 11 - 18 years old, as a gay woman I had to hide and it made me hide every part of myself away. All I did was study. They took our phones away for the first week so that we wouldn't talk to our parents in order to break emotional bonds. This really hit me hard.
@terrypaterson1889
@terrypaterson1889 Жыл бұрын
What is the BPF position in gender affirming therapy and the MoU?
@Spinnkles
@Spinnkles Жыл бұрын
Indoctrination. Unmet need at formative years. Dorms and rooms mirroring barracks. Violence daily. Solitude. Feral bullies. Lord of the flies. That’s Boarding school.
@terrypaterson1889
@terrypaterson1889 Жыл бұрын
Please stop projecting your middle class guilt onto all white people! Working class white people are not guilty for the behaviour of our past masters, we were as oppressed as black people, enslaved and kept in poverty and ignorance! You are spouting critical race theory as fact when it’s a very contentious issue and has very many critics, and negative divisive outcomes! Disappointed to see a so called psychoanalytic organisation going down the woke route!
@antoniafiorenza
@antoniafiorenza 2 жыл бұрын
Joy speaks with knowledge, sensitivity and awareness of this trauma. I was scarred for life by my first boarding school (sent aged 11 in the 1960s/70s) - had lifelong related anxiety issues. If you are a sensitive child the experience is a form of torture. I recognise so well the ABCD. From my arrival at prison I was numb: I spent the whole first term in a state of weird , anguished detachment : I couldn't return to the "me" my little self knew. Now I understand that I was traumatised. There was a lot of nastiness at that all-girls school. One incident I will never forget was being sick in my dormitory-struggling to reach the bathroom, but throwing up repeatedly all over the dormitory floor. The other girls thought it wildly funny, and teased and humiliated me.. Later a cartoon of me throwing up was passed around the school to the amusement of many. i was ill because of petit mal epilepsy brought on by stress. This was mild bullying compared to some events at the school. I was taken away eventually. Luckily my second school was progressive: far kinder, creative and more relaxed.
@danmosley4387
@danmosley4387 2 жыл бұрын
Clown show
@adamlakeman7240
@adamlakeman7240 2 жыл бұрын
Oh, so Helen Morgan has stopped complaining about how all whitoids are evil and need to die huh?
@glee_again2594
@glee_again2594 2 жыл бұрын
My husband was at British boarding school for elementary and middle school in Zambia, Africa. America parents were bush missionaries. I’m finally realizing after 23 years of marriage how it has likely affected him and our communication. Interestingly we together chose home education for our children. When I watch him with our children, I think of how he didn’t have that during the school year as a child & how hard that must have been.
@geralldus
@geralldus 2 жыл бұрын
What people espouse within a social group, where social acceptance is significant, is often very different from their depth belief. There is often a powerful need within the human mind for a vehicle that carries the repressed and unknown aspects of the psyche and racism seems to serve this function. Simple changing the conscious architecture may actually have little effect without a better knowledge, exploration and integration of the hidden and repressed aspects of the psyche. This process of discovery is unavailable to most people who have neither the resources, interest or aptitude to pursue it. The explosion and popularity of extremist political movements only too clearly illustrates that we are not, in many ways, owners but simple passing tourists in our own internal psychic landscape who marvel at the natural beauty of the countryside but do not see the hidden poverty, squalor and violence. Having said that, change and growth are always possible but there are also many paths open to enlightenment. Unfortunately the great majority are dead ends or paths that terminate with mirrors giving the illusion of depth but actually benefiting the few who are willing to learn from their own reflection......so life is certainly never dull!
@chris77777777ify
@chris77777777ify 2 жыл бұрын
Both my parents went to Boarding School Both Alcoholics & idiots. Both very weak emotional people
@lambd01d
@lambd01d 2 жыл бұрын
The thing I remember most about my first day of boarding school was a whole dorm full of boys crying. My mum said I could go back home if I didn't like it after half term, but I was sent back. I felt so betrayed. It has had a long term effect on my ability to form normal adult relationships and I have had a lot of quite severe mental health issues which definitely started at boarding school..
@arnicepernice8656
@arnicepernice8656 2 жыл бұрын
@shelbyvillerules9962
@shelbyvillerules9962 2 жыл бұрын
I went to boarding school in the 1990s and only now am I starting to realise how damaging my time there may have been and how it potentially could be at the root of many of the psychological and emotional problems I currently have in my life. So much of what Joy Schaverien discusses in this video feels so personal and true to my own experience it's almost frightening.
@Biggles2498
@Biggles2498 2 жыл бұрын
I actually enjoyed Boarding School on the edge of The New Forest Hampshire in some ways but the bullying and sexual assaults spoiled everything. It was no different to the Film "Scum" except your Parents paid the School for your Boarding Fees and it was survival of the fittest. Some Boarders ended up in same-sex Marriages(and before you shoot me down in flames I have nothing against Gay Men or Women) but I am talking about boys who would otherwise would have been straight, we were forbidden to even talk to girls outside of school and there was no such thing as "free time" ! Sundays included Church and Prep ,Sport being the only escape from this routine. The School even seem "shocked" that nobody wanted to have any contact with the Boarding School when we started our illustrious careers Officer Training in The Armed Services or Merchant Marine as we were often "badgered" to give "pep" talks to pupils especially the Sixth Form. Thankfully these days Boarding Schools are much more regulated and zero tolerance on bullying and sexual assaults by Staff !
@ZenAndPsychedelicHealingCenter
@ZenAndPsychedelicHealingCenter Жыл бұрын
That's not how being gay works.
@samo917
@samo917 2 жыл бұрын
Inspiring stuff
@drchaand
@drchaand 2 жыл бұрын
Hello! I'm working on a paper on remote therapy experiences. Is there any way I could get in touch with any of the psychologists in this panel? It would be really helpful and would make the work richer with words of such great psychotherapists.
@JM-xk3xs
@JM-xk3xs 2 жыл бұрын
Wonderful that this is available here, for those of us who were unable to attend the live event. Thank you.
@tomfaulkner6616
@tomfaulkner6616 3 жыл бұрын
Interesting to come back to this and to recognise the ABCD of boarding school experience. I have to say that I did not have specific abuse to deal with during my time at a largely boys public school but there was still a considerable amount of psychological trauma maybe short of bullying that has taken me over 40 years to try and recognise and even start to deal with. Despite all the years of therapy I have had I have only come across boarding school syndrome very recently and I seem to have glossed over the traumas connected to those teenage years and the subsequent fall out in the intervening years. My siblings and me all went to the same school, I was the eldest, but have not talked much about it except in passing and matter of factly. My parents did not board and took widely differing views on sending us there which didnt help.
@Saftaspoetryhour
@Saftaspoetryhour 3 жыл бұрын
I was sent to boarding school 3 months short of my 4th birthday after my mother passed. Its only decades later that I realize how searing the experience was.
@Susan-ol4ys
@Susan-ol4ys 3 ай бұрын
Love to you ❤
@tomfaulkner2055
@tomfaulkner2055 2 күн бұрын
thats far too young
@daisybuttercup6801
@daisybuttercup6801 3 жыл бұрын
Putting a child in a boarding school is abuse. This practice should be stopped. If the parents are unable to look after their children they should be put up for adoption for new parents to care and nurture them in a loving home.
@h3arty
@h3arty 3 жыл бұрын
you're 100% right. total abandonment into an abusive orphanage prison!
@simonthornton5344
@simonthornton5344 2 жыл бұрын
I attended a state run and mostly funded co educational boarding school from 1981 to 1986 and mostly loved the experience as did, so it seems the majority of my peers. Comments like yours are unnecessary and would no doubt be very hurtful to many loving parents. My elder brother did not want to attend the local comprehensive so my parents sought other options for him, it was his choice. I followed 3 years later having listened to his many tales of the general day to day of a boarding school and apart from the initial homesickness of the first year absolutely adored my time there, time I would not swap for anything. Am I affected? Possibly, although I generally consider myself to be fairly normal, do I feel abandoned? Not at all. Some people weren't suited to the life and quickly left, if others were made to remain then I guess they need to look to their parents.
@strengthandlove_
@strengthandlove_ 3 жыл бұрын
one thing didnt make sense, was the lady said they dont offer classical jungian training, but then she also said it was bilingual and that we have to live in two worlds. so was confused is it taught or it is not taught?
@ntatemohlomi2884
@ntatemohlomi2884 3 жыл бұрын
I was sent away aged 10. I'm 45 now and still can't get the whole thing out of my head. And I know and speak to several people from similar backgrounds who are so severely stunted they are just plain not coping. *One just wakes up only to go fishing *Another wanks himself all day *Yet another says consist only of leaving the house for work and straight back, can't bear to be seperated from his children. *Another is a 50 year old bachelor who just can't make the next step but hopes to soon. * Should I go on? And we suffer alone in silence.
@glee_again2594
@glee_again2594 2 жыл бұрын
May this video show there are people who care. I’m here because my 62 year old husband was at boarding school for several elementary years into middle school and then sent from parents to live with a grandparent to finish high school. I’m trying to understand the communication issues we are having 23 years into marriage. I’ve just now at 47 realized I bet his years at boarding school and abandonment (even though it wasn’t the intention of parents) have greatly affected his psyche. He seemed to have an overall positive relationship with his parents. But I only saw it with him as an independent adult. Not as a child.
@fatgoit
@fatgoit 3 жыл бұрын
As a weekly boarder from 13 to 16. I am in my 40s now and found answers to my mental health issues from learning about this recently.
@glee_again2594
@glee_again2594 2 жыл бұрын
That’s so great! I wish my husband could seek out help.