219 - Dodeca | An Unfinished Cry

[@hueitor1748]

Danixks upload: day saved Now it's time to read a little while listening to a beautiful song Thanks me boi, luv ya

[@Numbskill]

I understand how it feels to be consumed by dread, and the stuff you’ve written connects with me. I wish you the best of luck.

[@LazyCatAnims]

I just read the description. This music is some of the most beautiful things I have ever heard. I also really hope that you are able to enjoy life again soon. Try not to worry about the past or the future. Just focus on yourself right now. Let yourself relax. Remember that there are people out there who genuinely care for you. I would recommend seeing a therapist. I can't guarantee that all this would help, but I genuinely hope that you get better.

[@hueitor1748]

You said what was in my mind

[@LazyCatAnims]

@@DaniXks I'm glad to hear that you are seeking help instead of giving up. Keep going!

[@utazor]

@@DaniXks Friend, I'm still waiting for the finale of Ghost and Dodeca, I wish you to overcome your depression :3

[@utazor]

@@DaniXks What caused the depression?

[@DaniXks]

​@@utazor Wouldn't it be great if there was a simple answer to that? It's not one particular thing. I'm not even sure if I really have "depression". Maybe come back in around 10 years, if you want, to read my descriptions. Don't worry now, it's ok.

[@KFCjanitor740]

My favourite piece so far!

[@rafail_vsk]

The complete pack is to read the description while you listening the music. Amazing 🎶 🙌🙌

[@tarkkh9787]

the stills are beautiful, the song is marvelous

[@endyx2708]

I listen to it almost every day since it's in my daily playlist

[@MrLag]

Welcome to a world where internal minds wage war. I have learned that a work of art does not need to be perfect to be appreciated. An author's mind can be lost in the mist of its creation, seeking and repairing any imperfection they encounter. However, they fall into a mind-working dilemma. Either work on it until perfection is achieved, but this will only grind the working will to its driest. Or either release the work, for everyone to see, for everybody to embark on a journey the artist proposed, even with its defects. But a perfect work does not exist. How many mistakes do I see on the works I released ? The regret and the pain to show the world an imperfect object, not shaped how I always wanted. But at the same time, why does it seem that I left, that I am creation-less, that I did not produce anything ? This is what can be seen from an exterior's eye. I truly sit on a mountain of ideas, of representations of my feelings and my emotions, of the sentiments and scenes I want to share. The reason is the lack of motivation, because I know that it will not be perfect, that mistakes will be introduces by my only fault. This is not how I should be reasoning and this is not how you do either. You did overcome this fallacy, this dilemma and released it, for everyone to hear, read and see. I will not tell you how you should feel about it, this is the role of nobody but you. However, I can tell that proud is how I feel. That a deeply emotional piece built by you has been heard, read and seen by someone else than you. And that takes effort, courage and motivation that I lack but you do not. I am not here to understand you, that is the role of friends, family and those close to you, which I am not. I am however here to follow you, you are the guide of your own work, sending emotions and feelings through the best medium, sharing a sentiment of loneliness and solitude, of a seemingly love-lacking life. An internal and mental pain you might want the world to know and to acknowledge. I am also not here to give you solutions. Although mental wellness is something that I deeply care to the ones I know, I never found a magic wand and spell to fix that. There are no magic solutions, but there are supports and aids that might slow down the drop and even help you slowly recover. One of them, is sharing words, that you do through the works you provide. These works represent your mental state (and you know that better than I) and it is the role of others to understand the ramifications of what you produced, of the war you wage. The mental battles are common yet uncommon at the same time. I, too, have a troubled mind, fighting for a meaning to life against other unworldly wits, but these battles are for sure different to yours. From battles ensues casualties that needs to be extracted using a way or another. Producing medias is a method. Producing works of art is the following. Art is a way to externalize one's troubled state, that is how I see it. This is what you did and will probably keep doing. Your work, your pieces, your "Dodeca", is a representation of your mental wellness. It is your do-decadence. And you can care about it.

[@MrLag]

@@DaniXks First, I am glad that you sought help. Therapists will be more useful than a lost mind on the internet ! Then, I'll be brief but I will try to show you what I feel inside, because having a comment by a somewhat related mind might give you some new view points, like you do on me. I've said it, I also have a troubled mind but, unlike you, I was not aware of that for the longest time. I have kept those anxious thoughts inside me, hiding them to the world and myself without realizing it and that worsen my mental state. Step by step, I headed to the conclusion that people appreciated me for the works I produced, mostly academic, rather than what I am. I always sought validation for the way I act with others, for my morals and values, but never got the response. So I felt (and still feel) like nobody truly understands me, that I was on a makeshift raft that could collapse at any moment. And then it did and only have some planks to keep me afloat. It broke because of me, because I do not know how to properly communicate, to properly share my feelings and emotions, to properly show my true self. That is when I started to be more open emotionally to others, and it is still fresh as I hit the ground only some weeks ago. And I am also truly sorry to the ones who genuinely try to help me, to no avail. It seems like, both of us, were defined by what we produced. You fell into a vicious loop of producing work for your seemingly own good but only worsen yourself. I did not but still fell into a vicious loop of being unable to produce anything by fear of being misinterpreted or misunderstood. You have anxiety when you are not working, I have anxiety when I am. Because I know that I will not be able to finish it, and that will dawn on me. These are the failures of my own corruption, of my own doing and I do not know how to escape. That is why I will always tell you what I was lacking and the pitfalls to avoid. I might not escape but I can give you the tools to avoid the hole. Finally, I will just add that "motivation" is the right word in my eyes. The piece might not be like you wanted it to be but you still worked on it and produced a finished work. And finally published it. Not for validation, not even for the enjoyment of the people, but for your own wellness and to share a hidden feeling. You put your energy on the music, the stills and the story, but this is not the most important thing here. The most important is the description you have given, because it is probably the only thing you produced without a constraint or a hindrance. It is, I think, what you always wanted to share and show. I might not have the best wording, the best metaphors or the best artistic touch. But I will always be there, silently checking if everything is fine. Take care, you deserve it !

[@endyx2708]

Masterpiece

[@rickardrocks2160]

It is very nice!

[@rickardrocks2160]

KZbin algorythm brought me back today, not dissapointed. Very nice!

[@blu3kill3er]

Is there any chance to have a link for a HQ download ? This piece of music resonate a lot with me

[@DaniXks]

Yes, I've uploaded my released music on my bandcamp page. Here is the link: danixks.bandcamp.com/

[@blu3kill3er]

@@DaniXks Thanks a lot but 1k€ seems like a steep price

[@DaniXks]

@@blu3kill3er Haha, I will make it 0 till midnight then.

[@blu3kill3er]

@@DaniXks That's very nice of you unfortunatly I missed it because I didnt get the notification. I'm still willing to purchase it but is the price of 1000€ a mistake or is it voluntary ? As much as I love it I dont have this amount to buy music ...

[@DaniXks]

​@@blu3kill3er Well...it was voluntary, I wanted the price to kind of reflect the value of this piece for me. If I could I would go above 1K. It was more like a funny little thing... I will set it again on 0 till you tell me you have downloaded it.

[@jakkaj]