3 SHOCKING Love Tips For the Perfect Relationship | Relationship Theory

[@RadoslawMichalak]

If we could all talk as openly and honestly as you two, the world would be a better place.

[@ap-1818]

These videos are crazy educational for people that truly want to have a stable and healthy relationship with their partner. Thank you for being real and just laying it all out on the table.

[@aimbig5616]

1. The importance of being selfish 2. Base assumption+ insecurities . Go beyond the 'tea' n discuss the real shit . Plus distrusting yourself n opting for the hard truth really helps 3.let go of all expectations ... You can ofcourse have your limits but no expations of what a perfect relationship is

[@bageshwaradhamanubhavreact12]

@kzbin.info/www/bejne/iqKudYyVZ6ubjbc

[@ilsea.4258]

Thanks for listing them, I like writing down the bases of each video on my journal to remind myself 😅

[@pirahna1548]

Even being single this is good stuff to know

[@bageshwaradhamanubhavreact12]

@kzbin.info/www/bejne/iqKudYyVZ6ubjbc

[@Godisfirst21]

This makes me so HAPPY I am single. I wouldn't trade my single life for any of this crap, lol.

[@Godisfirst21]

@Edwoods Philosophy It's the best;)

[@jayaom4946]

Oh, definitely, much better if you're looking at it while you're single. It will help you to be ready for a healthy relationship and look for a partner who wants a healthy relationship as well.

[@TinaLeder]

Miscommunication in arguments comes from: 1) Base assumption 2) Insecurity

[@XZ858XZ]

....And much more, like differences in culture, upbringing, personal expectations, values, personality differences, and also, things can be misconstrued when one or both have weak communication/listening skills And even after that there are still tons more reasons. I don’t understand why people love coming around and dropping these reductions as though they’re such deep love gurus who have relationships all figured out

[@yabe1496]

Manipulation Having hidden agendas

[@cindyf1946]

I love how ambitious and open Lisa & Tom are about their relationship, and how much thoughtfulness they bring to analyzing the challenges and commitments that have brought them closer and made their union so strong.

[@LovelyDecrie]

Caring for yourself FIRST is the absolute most important step in cultivating any relationship. The better you care for yourself, the better you’re able to care for others, and the stronger that relationship has the potential to be. ❤️

[@natachaimi3334]

That's right ! Be happy with ur self can lead to a happy couple💓

[@cherylm.6448]

Love listening to your raw, deep, vulnerable conversations. Such a lovely couple having an amazing impact on the collective ♡

[@LisaBilyeu]

❤️

[@alyseconnors]

I am extremly grateful for you both.. Years ago when I first watched/listened to relationship theory I hadn't grown enough to understand. I was really like "I don't get it, they talk like they're a business partnership" I really couldn't appreciate your insight. After a bunch of self reflection, reading some of the book recommendations and therapy work, I now can appreciate and even model how you guys communicate within my own relationship and with my children. Self awareness and honesty are hella dope lol. Thank you for teaching me how to be better.

[@bageshwaradhamanubhavreact12]

@kzbin.info/www/bejne/iqKudYyVZ6ubjbc

[@melvinsalvador]

Tom and Lisa undeniably have one of the strongest public-facing relationships found on the internet - period. Their candid, yet vulnerable conversations condense YEARS of hard-earned wisdom and its incredible to see how TO THIS DAY they’re still trying to figure this stuff out like the rest of us. I’ve learned far more from a handful of Relationship Theory episodes than I have in years of blindly fumbling through relationships. What’s more amazing is how applicable this stuff is to business relationships, family, friends, etc. By far some of the most transformative content on the internet. It will change you if you let it.

[@elvinacheah]

I really hope that there’s another episode like this but on friendship.

[@BeneaththesurfaceNo]

I highly agree!!! You have given me an idea. ♥️🍀

[@fabiosuccess2895]

To be fair, these rules still apply even in a friendship.

[@skurbadurba]

yaaaas

[@bageshwaradhamanubhavreact12]

@kzbin.info/www/bejne/iqKudYyVZ6ubjbc

[@imonmyway317]

I agree with à previous reply in that these would apply also to friendships

[@TakeBackYourMind997]

"Put your mask on before you put on someone else's." I'm fully with Lisa on this one, that is one of the biggest fundamentals of my relationship and my life! How can you give to others if you yourself don't have enough.

[@dilaudum1075]

Berne Brown uses the statement "The story I'm telling myself is..." when arguing with her husband. That's a way of distrusting yourself AND communicating your base assumptions.

[@InfiniteTriztan1111]

Her husband or her wife? she has a wife btw.

[@amberbracken7172]

@@InfiniteTriztan1111 Brené Brown? She has a husband.

[@TinaSotis]

Brene Brown's use of the phrase "the story in my head..." immediately takes away the sense of threat to the other person. It places the focus of the issue onto your OWN and possibly flawed interpretation of the other person's actions and intent, if you know what I mean. The use of the word "story" also conjures a bit of needed lightness at a tense time. It takes away blame, forces you to own your feelings, and makes room for other interpretations. I use that trick a lot, and it helps.

[@LisaBilyeu]

Powerful!! 🔥

[@reinaldomartinez13]

the level of communication and articulation to say your thoughts with one another is what I strive for with my future partner, goddamn yall are monsters

[@brittneylyon6884]

First off thank you guys for all the podcasts/ channels you do. You’ve helped my marriage in so many ways and watching your videos has become a routine for my husband and I. I have a lot to say, but I’ll leave it short for now lol you guys are just a great inspiration. Thank you!

[@bageshwaradhamanubhavreact12]

@kzbin.info/www/bejne/iqKudYyVZ6ubjbc

[@elizabethjwiegner2198]

One thing I love about you both and your relationship is how you aren't afraid to do and say what works for your relationship. Too many people have in their head what they expect relationships to be or what they traditionally are or what worked for their so-and-so, but aren't brave enough to take the time to dig down into what actually makes a relationship (a strong, deep, meaningful relationship) work -- and then put in the work to make it happen. You both are awesome 😍

[@amigobuddy2009]

Loved that. I love how expressive Tom is when he's impressed by what Lisa is saying. It's a personality trait that I'd love to pick up.

[@meet_thefreemans]

Also love the comment on “distrusting yourself.” I think it’s a balance of owning your truth and also challenging your own beliefs. So many people abandon their truth in relationships and end up resenting the partner. One thing we love about your partnership, is that you two have a strong relationship with “self” and really respect yourselves.

[@leahannwhite1111]

HERE'S THE. MOST. PROFOUND Relationship advice you'll ever hear: It Only Takes One to Have a Happy Marriage It doesn't take two people to end war in a marriage; it takes only one. And if two people have ended it, life can be twice as beautiful. * Defense is the first act of war. When people used to say, "Katie, you don't listen," I would immediately bristle and respond, "Of course I listen! How dare you say that! Who do you think you are? I listen!" I didn't realize that I was the one making war by defending myself. And I was the one who could end it. It doesn't take two people to end war; it takes only one. The ego hates criticism and loves agreement. Actually, for the ego, love is nothing more than agreement. A relationship is two people who agree with each other's stories. If I agree with you, you love me. And the minute I don't agree with you, the moment I question one of your sacred beliefs, I become your enemy; you divorce me in your mind. Then you start looking for all the reasons why you're right, and you stay focused outside yourself. When you're focused outside and believe that your problem is caused by someone else, rather than by your attachment to the story you're believing in the moment, you are your own victim, and the situation appears to be hopeless. Your partner is your mirror. Except for the way you perceive him, he doesn't even exist for you. He is who you see he is, and ultimately it's just you again, thinking. It's just you, over and over and over, and in this way you remain blind to yourself and feel justified and lost. To think that your partner is anything but a mirror of you is painful. So when you see him as flawed in any way, you can be sure that that's where your own flaw is. The flaw has to be in your thinking, because you're the one projecting it. You are always what you judge us to be in the moment. There's no exception. You are your own suffering; you are your own happiness. There's no way to truly join your partner except by getting free of your belief that you need something from him that he's not giving. Nothing can cost you someone you love. There's nothing your husband can possibly do to keep you from loving him. The only way you can lose him is by believing what you think. You're one with your husband until you believe that he should look a certain way, he should give you something, he should be something other than what he is. That's how you divorce him. Right then and there, you have lost your marriage. Of course, sometimes it's best to physically leave. If your husband is abusive, question your thoughts about why you stay. As you enlighten yourself to what's true, you may come to see that the only sane choice is to leave him. You may love him with all your heart and simply know not to live with him. We don't have to be fearful, bitter, or angry to end a marriage. Or, if you're not ready to leave, you may stay in the marriage, but with a greater awareness of how you're abusing yourself by allowing him to abuse you. It's like a yard with a big sign on the gate: THIS DOG BITES. If you walk into the yard once and are bitten, the dog has bitten you. If you walk into the yard a second time and are bitten, you have bitten you. This very awareness can change everything. By questioning your mind, you begin to realize that ultimately no one can hurt you--only you can. You see that you are 100 percent responsible for your own happiness. This is very good news. If my husband were to have an affair and that were not okay with me, I would say, "Sweetheart, I understand that you're having an affair, and I notice that when you do that, something inside me tends to move away from you. I don't know what that is, I only know that it's so; it mirrors your movement away from me, and I want you to know that." And then if he were to continue his affair, to prefer to spend his time with another woman, I might notice that I was moving away, but I wouldn't have to leave him in anger. There is nothing I can do to stay with him, and there is nothing I can do to divorce him. I'm not running this show. I might stay with him, or I might divorce him in a state of total love, and think, This is fascinating; we promised we would be together always, and I'm divorcing him now, and I would probably laugh, love that he has what he wants, and move on, because there is no war in me. It doesn't take two people to end war in a marriage; it takes only one. And if two people have ended it, life can be twice as beautiful. Byron Katie ❤ Founder of The Work, Author of Loving What Is and A Thousand Names for Joy

[@gabrielasuarez8553]

Hi Lisa and Tom! I’m Gaby from Mexico. I want to tell you that I love your channels, the content you share and the amazing interviews you make. You are the best teachers ever. Love from Mexico.

[@JAYl97]

This is why it's very vital to hear a women's perspective and man's perspective. Love this.! ❤ ✊🏽

[@kellitudisco9928]

Can't convey in words how much value my husband and I have gained from following your work and taking in content from the both of you, thank you x1000000000000

[@senorzepeda]

My girlfriend and I have utilized some of the tools your share to have a happy relationship and they have worked. Our favorite is discussing hard things with each when we are both “emotionally sober”

[@dianas1324]

Her smile when he says "the love of my life" 😁❤ so cute

[@Godisfirst21]

That was actually the ONLY thing I loved that he said to her.

[@AhmetKaan]

*“The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be.”* ―Ralph Waldo Emerson The chances of you seeing this comment is pretty low, but if you did, *I hope you have an amazing day...* 🖤

[@alen-commentnazi8774]

Irrelevant comment to get clout for ur channel

[@alonsogomez1015]

I really think the importance of selfishness is wildly overlooked on a relationship.

[@sssoumiya]

Heyo, I’m Soumiya, 17, focused in neurotech x femtech and built brainwave-directed prosthetic/games/keyboards and now an infradian rhythm-centric productivity app! Takeaways: - How to find the fine line between preserving your identity + making necessary sacrifices for the relationship? - Someone upsets us when an insecurity/something you’re already worried about is highlighted (when someone doesn’t behave the way you expect them to) - How to actively counter rationalization bias: take a second to distinguish between fact and perception to determine the root of the issue to be addressed

[@catalinadowney927]

Self care first before caring for the other person.

[@lilly4321]

Lisa, I’m so happy you let Tom talk most of the time. Men need to unburden, open up, listen to themselves to realize that’s a way to become truly to themselves. Lisa you are a truly inspiration ✨🙌🏻💞❤️🌷🌸💐

[@brunomouraleite]

Trust in each other and open conversation. I value this sooooo much. Thank you Lisa and Tom for the amazing value you bring your community.

[@mateimanolescu3478]

Distrusting/questioning your initial thoughts and reactions is such a great advice! Thank you for everything, Tom and Lisa!

[@jenniekrist5792]

SoSO good- exploring another’s inner world with genuine curiosity, compassion, and non-judgement as we do with ourselves. Be radically responsible for your own fulfillment don’t wait for them to bring it to you. “I love you and this relationship more than being right”

[@meet_thefreemans]

Tom and Lisa, you have NO idea how aligned we are with your content. It’s not about the tea, it’s not about the socks, it’s not about the dishes. It’s about what it MEANS to you. You guys, it would be a dream come true, literally, for us to win the 30 minute hangout session with you two. Like you have no idea how much it would fulfill a dream on our manifestation list. Our missions so align with yours and we would make that 30 minutes turn into a decade of momentum and IMPACT. Love you guys!!

[@JAYl97]

More women need to speak like this keep it real and grounded in reality. And we can communicate! ❤

[@fortunakaleci1218]

The whole thing about distrusting yourself is so amazing and humble but also so exhausting when it’s only coming one way in the relationship. You guys are amazing!!!!

[@n.m6249]

This couple is an example of marrying your best friend. They are literally like friends Woooow I can fully relate to the fact of relocating and leaving family, we not married yet and I have lots of doubts

[@danielle7729]

This was amazing! I love it! You two are so awesome for telling these things to people. Letting go of expectations and being selfish are 2 things I had to learn in my marriage as well. So powerful. Once I learned to be selfish, with my kids too, my life improved dramatically

[@Momentum88]

These are such great conversations. Thank you!

[@maryanafernandez9201]

OMG that was mindblown ! 100% of all my arguments with my ex bf till these days (cause he is the father of my son) is due to a different way of describing feelings and attitude. Whatever I say is disrespectful he says back "it's not disrespectful" or I say "I just want you to respect me" he'd be like "but I do.. for me you are the best mother our son can have" then I say, it's a sort of admiration not respect.. and jeez I could go on here for hours! I just wish I could win this 30 min with you guys so maybe I would get some more insights in how to handle our differences in a way that would avoid any type of argument resulting in us being able to offer a good example for our son to have and obviously make our family time (whenever we are all together) happy and memorable for our little one! Thank you for sharing these stories about your marriage! Take care guys x

[@Wc3dragon]

Hey Tom, I’ve been listening to you almost daily for about 4 months and I gotta say it’s helped a ton. I love your open mindset in Impact theory and in this channel as well. Thank you!

[@janicenagao7409]

"Fell in love" with you two. Because you fought to have this vibrant, healthy, transformative relationship where you become one.

[@meganparducho7756]

Love this and agree completely. Just wanted to say that I was in a really rough place in my relationship last year and I started listening to a lot of both of your videos, about relationships but also about life in general. I realized I needed to get out of that toxic relationship and work on my dreams even if they scared me. I've grown exponentially since then. Thank you for the messages you share!

[@ToddMcClain7777]

[30-min. convo entry] Amazing to hear the openness and vulnerability of your relationship to help others make great relationships.

[@eshelchardon861]

We are a young couple who adore you guys and would love to have a two vs two conversation about how to improve our relationship and life!

[@nadialucia9038]

Incredibly brilliant conversation! DEFINITELY giving this channel a follow

[@EmpoweredMindBodyBreath]

"The need to define terms..." - SO IMPORTANT!!! My husband and I struggle with miscommunication and communication in general. We actually just got into a heated debate over this today. We are both very reactive and I'm quite passionate that it interferes. The cup of tea argument is WAY too relatable. It's never about the thing you're arguing about. #truth Hubs and I absolutely need to win the chat with y'all 🤣

[@nicj5354]

We fought over cheese - specifically EXACTLY how long it took to melt said cheese.

[@zinzivimbani518]

This is the best segment of relationship theory I've watched. Very insightful, detailed and well articulated. Love it!

[@mykallincoln8761]

Dude I absolutely love your mindset and your content. Everything you talk about validates all the things I said to myself when I was young and let others convince me I was crazy to think. Thank you

[@eduardoreyes2449]

(30 min zoom hangout entry) I love listening to both of you and how you went more in depth into the cup of tea story. I have heard it a couple of times in your interviews on Impact Theory. Which is something that has helped me realized that sometimes an argument with my girlfriend went further than it should over some petty thing but it was only because there was something deeper there. I don’t know why your cup of tea story has such a big impact in my life but it truly has. I have applied it not just in my relationship with my partner but I have implemented the cup of tea theory in all of my relationships with friends, family and even strangers. Came to realize that many times we as humans get triggered over little things which explode to something out of proportion because there is a deeper issue not being addressed. When you are able to realize why that particular thing set you off you are better able to have control of the outcome of that conversation. Hope both you and Lisa have a great weekend! and if given the chance would appreciate to get to hangout with both of you.

[@hsdeeksha]

This is profound.. I only wish someone had told me this a while ago.

[@harjitwalia1577]

I relate with Lisa in so many ways, I too had gut issues growing up and realized too late about what was going on. My illness was the reason I discovered Impact theory and you guys. Your guys provide super quality content through all your channels Impact, relationships & Health theory. I watch most of the videos you guys put out and they have helped me a lot in the past years. If you end up selecting me for the 1 on 1 session, I would be truly greatful. Thanks for the work and effort you both put into everything you do, I really appreciate it and wish you guys the best. Please keep up the great work😊

[@Conceptsexplainedsimply]

The thing that just stood out to me was when Tom said that you guys can mention that something is triggering you and you NEVER WEAPONIZE it. I was in a very abusive relationship with a covert narcissist and still deal with her because I had a son with her, but she would weaponize my insecurities or sensitive areas a ton. It was BRUTAL to go through having someone who I loved at the time attack me so deeply.

[@valerielow4572]

I have so much respect for you guys. Thank you for the discussion!! ❤️

[@jennysanchez822]

Wow! Yes! Let go of all expectations

[@nicoletoni3176]

Even though there can be a negative connotation to the word selfish, I love how you explained it in this context, Lisa. It’s really about the responsibility of loving and taking care of yourself so that you can show up fully in the relationship as yourself - because a healthy relationship is two whole people in relationship with each other, not two people coming together to complete each other.

[@TinaLeder]

I already commented on this when it published, but I'm going to comment again. Honestly, this episode was so good, I sent it to my man to watch together on v-day.❤️

[@x0utthei]

Brought me to tears. Thank you. Cant wait to show my partner

[@gloriavela9221]

Hello I can recommend you to a great powerful spell caster, who helped me to get my ex boyfriend back in 6 hours without delays ........

[@daniellesholly8400]

It’s amazing how the smallest things can cause such huge fights! It’s never ‘about the tea’. Thank you both for opening up your relationship challenges for all the world to see and learn from. You two are definitely #relationshipgoals ✨💪🏻 I would be honored to spend 30minutes in the presence of greatness ❤️ This Valentine’s I am focusing on deep self love and respect for leaving an emotionally abusive relationship in October. Building myself up to love again and I hope to attract in a partner who is growth mindset like you guys! We all have baggage, find someone who loves you enough to help you unpack 😊 Cheers!

[@goddessrenee]

I have always struggled to go deeper in marriage. Im excellent at doing this on my own after the fact. But in the moment I freeze up. Im now on my third marriage. I do know the few times when I have asked deeper questions I get “ I don’t know” types of responses. I love how you two are able to communicate.

[@goddessdepanama7431]

I’ve watched a few of the relationship theory videos and I am in awe of how you guys flow. It’s more than a marriage. I’m gonna need to manifest this immediately!

[@honestappraisal217]

I’m new to this channel of yours, but safe to say mind blown & sitting watching going “yes”, “yes”, “uh ha!”, “yes!” So cool, so well done guys and thank you - we need more honesty, vulnerability and intelligence in relationship advice! Keep it up, please!

[@Vanessa-jr9mg]

We love watching your videos! Always so insightful, honest and raw. ❤️

[@BlackR0seField]

Been listening to Relationship Theory since its first edition. I was so sad when you discontinued it, and HYPED when you brought it back! ❤️❤️

[@charlielawson2001]

All I can say is Lisa and Tom, you have changed my life! 😄 I watch all of your content and It would take a lifetime to express what your story means to me and my own journey. I would love to meet you both and aspire to achieve at a level that earns me that space. I write stories, and want to use the power of storytelling to help people (as I know you do) No matter what, keep it up you two. Thank you

[@amp35203]

Thank you for sharing your thoughtful and realistic approach to relationships. Every aspect of my life is better because of the two of you. I especially appreciated Tom's perspective on distrusting yourself when you're going through something emotional and Lisa's tip for letting go of expectations in relationships.

[@kamaya_444]

I am so excited to watch these and learn more before I get into a relationship. I have been celibate and out of all relationships for 2 & 1/2 years, to become whole. I’m still a work in progress and I am so grateful that y’all are being so transparent about your relationship to help others! Blessings to you both!!!

[@pop_kitinka]

I wish my partner would listen to your videos (he does not speak English). He is too stubborn and stuck in his world where he does not ackowledge that happy relationship requires two partners who are happy alone... I love your dialogues and your views, I admire how real you are with each other.

[@TheFreedPerspective]

{hangout entry please!} I swear, I just love you both! My partner/boyfriend/soulmate/person😁 and I are doing the long-distance thing and your videos have been immensely helpful on being intentional AF. Getting down to the nitty gritty has been our aim and it’s so much fun to be able to kind of follow along with the topics of your episodes.💚

[@aracelyfernandez345]

The being selfish and the expectation sections of the video really helped me gain a new perspective of being in a relationship. Thank you so much for this video! Please keep them coming! 💕✨

[@thekatesaga]

"PEACE!" Omg I freaking love you two. This. Was. AMAZING. Each of those were so powerful! The importance of selfishness and of letting go of preconceived expectations?! Can I get a hell yeah?? And I actually applied the "tea" story to an argument with my sister about a screwdriver - which wasn't about the screwdriver! Lol and because I distrusted myself and my reaction, we were able to calm down and hash it out... this sh*t saves relationships!!

[@nadiag366]

Tom you're so incredibly wise and eloquent 🙆‍♀️ I get so impressed when ever I listen to you. I hope the man I end up with has even a bit of your mentality and perspective. 🌺

[@mrsiz218]

Communication is key! Been with my guy for 22 years. We rarely fight anymore because you choose your battles. It is not necessary to get all up in arms over minor things, but it’s important that you both have the same definition of minor. Lol when we do fight we make sure to talk it out and clear the air. More often the not, it’s usually just a misunderstanding or misinterpretation. It works for us and I couldn’t imagine spending my life with anyone else!

[@masterassassin2222]

Grown so much relationship wise from this. Some of the few Og’s that keep it 100% thank you

[@cocoazen]

"people are mistaking an emotion for objective truth" - this happens all the time

[@lilithjesus7718]

Watching on mute in the beginning - kinda random, normally I'd have the volume up for this- watching your guys' body language and facial expressions say it all for me about the quality of your connection. I'm in 🤟 Relationship Theory ! Love is a lifelong personal passion of mine. I'm excited to learn what is your wisdom that has emerged from 20 years together and interacting like this 😌 🙏 💗

[@colbyherrington4923]

Would love to share 30 minutes with Tom & Lisa! Happy Valentine’s Day and thank you for the opportunity

[@mayrabravo4637]

I hope my SO watches this video as well. I would really appreciate it.

[@vetlevist3897]

So glad I came across you guys! First impact theory, then health theory and now relationship theory. Keep delivering huuge value!

[@gabrielasalguero4488]

You guys are amazing. My boyfriend and I with your guys tips have been able to grow our relationship to space! Just want it to thank you and show my gratefulness to you! Respect ✊! ❤️

[@elizabethcowie2069]

After having been on my own for 10 years after a 20 year marriage, I am looking at your podcasts and finding a great resource for how to build my road map for my next relationship.

[@NewMavericks]

3 great takeaways from a great couple! Looking at yourself first and making the adjustments is much better than arguing about it.

[@nomsayolisa1804]

Love you guys . You have helped me navigate my relationship with so much ease, we so happy

[@HavenatLee]

“Bring home an emotion for me to feel”… Good stuff!

[@jajibashiroluwatobiloba7767]

Be patient with yourself

[@AhmetKaan]

“Be patient with yourself. Self-growth is tender; it’s holy ground. There’s no greater investment.” ―Stephen Covey

[@pejic7]

Thank you both for energy that you put into making your videos. I must say that when I "logicly" think about thing that you talk about, I get everything. But putting things into practica... That is a big chalange 😁 so again, thank you both!

[@sanaghafoor84]

I love Tom's advice about identifying rules of engagement. Seems like a simple advice but oh so powerful and probably one of the biggest reasons why most marriages end up in divorce.

[@tinakulojevic2592]

Me and my partner love listening to your videos and discuss how it relates to our relationship. I think we have common personality traits and differences between each other like you guys do so we would benefit a lot from a zoom call with you :) and even if we don't get it, keep up the good work, we appreciate what you do! ❤️

[@jamesjensengrace3819]

These discussions you two have been having on this show have been amazing. It has helped me go deeper with myself and deeper in my relationship. Thank you, thank you!

[@RealStaceyCopas]

“It’s not about the tea!” You’re so spot on. I’ve got a wonderful relationship, still early days and we’d love a zoom with you! I spent an hour talking about some of the things you both talked about on Clubhouse through the week (which led me here 🙏🏻❤️).

[@stevepoythress4678]

Thank you both for sharing - biggest takeaway that strikes me is the level of mutual respect. PROPS.

[@InternetLiJo]

Great episode all. Being selfish is critical to growing the self and interdependence.

[@YaminiKalluri98]

An ardent fan of yours! 🙏

[@kiwicracka]

Faaaantastic conversation! 💝 This stuff is what gets me going ⚡ Thank you for sharing your wisdom 🙏🏼

[@laheil3373]

Assume good intentions. Recognize old patterns and apologize for your part. We’ve been married 27 years now. After the first 10 and thinking of leaving, I told my husband: I want the great marriage, in fact, I love myself and you enough to demand that for each other. But we had to do the work. It began with brutal honesty without judgement- we both spilled our emotions and feelings out to each other- with no judgement of whether they were valid or not. It gave us the chance to understand the perspective of the other and perceptions that we had. Once we understood each other’s view of the world, we could recognize patterns and respect triggers. After my husband became permanently disabled and I have been his care taker for 10 years, I learned about being ‘selfish’ so that I could be present in his care, making sure that he felt loved and had dignity. To do that, if I ever felt the slightest sense of resentment, I knew it was a signal to recharge myself and change my thought processes towards gratitude so that I could care for him with love. In turn, he treats me with profound adoration and tenderness. To me, we have the greatest bond on earth, worth every bit of the effort.

[@miljanaplamenac1284]

Two mindful humans. Thank you 🙂

[@peterpapaioannou98]

WOW!!! What an amazing video and advice! I listened to this with my wife while having breakfast and it was mind blowing. Thanks guys!!

[@ekaterinakatzarova6211]

This video was so enlightening, thank you! It is definitely important to feel whole before you start a relationship because depending on someone will only hurt you. That is one my takeaway, but the video was wonderful! Congrats on 20 years of marriage, wishing you 100 more to come! ♥️🙏 I would love to win the zoom session with both of you. This year is all about my spiritual journey and this will bring me so much joy and insight about what a healthy relationship is.

[@LeahWriter]

Lisa saved money by making tea at home🤣 Great talk guys. 💜 Happy Valentine's Day I totally agree with distrusting yourself. I do that too when I'm in conflict.