Ustadh Asim Khan | Masculinity, Ghayra For Women & Working Wives | BB #77

In this no holds barred episode of the Blood Brothers Podcast, Dilly and Aki Hussain speak with author, lecturer and the imam of Redbridge Islamic Centre, Ustadh Asim Khan. #BloodBrothersPodcast #UstadhAsimKhan #Masculinity
Topics of discussion include:
- Understanding masculinity and femininity from a Quranic perspective: 00:00:20 - 00:25:02
- Avoiding unIslamic sources and role models to define ourselves: 00:25:03 - 00:29:24
- Selectively following Islam and turning to Allah: 00:25:25 - 00:35:16
- What is meant by having ‘ghayra’ for your womenfolk? 00:35:19 - 00:49:17
- Having ghayra in the age of social media: 00:49:18 - 00:55:51
- Gender priorities and responsibilities in marriages, and working wives: 00:55:52 - 01:05:20
- Asking prospective spouses the right questions before marriage: 01:05:21 - 01:14:09
- Being productive with your time and Ustadh Asim Khan authoring books: 01:14:10 - 01:29:48
Order ‘The Simple Seerah’ Part 1: www.amazon.co.uk/dp/173990950X/
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[@5Pillars]

As salaamu alaykum brothers, sisters, friends and foes. Please like, share and comment on this video, as well as subscribing to the 5Pillars KZbin channel! Jazakallah khayran.

[@NGabriel88]

Wa aleykum salam. What was the name of the female scholar you mentioned @ 54:17 min?

[@CoachZubair]

@@NGabriel88 Dr farhat hashmi

[@SA-pk8lg]

This is my favourite podcast to date and I’m saying this as a Muslim woman. Ustadh Asim explains this concept in an uncompromising manner ma sha Allah. We need more content like this!

[@GWLPodcast]

Brilliant episode with Ustadh Asim. May Allah bless him.

[@hibatuadam2777]

Aaameeen

[@saahirkhan7994]

Brother Dilly's random use of urdu/bengali words is podcast gold! Even though I don't understand the word itself, the meaning's not lost!

[@NabeelKhan-ci8gw]

allah humma baarik, I feel every youth needs to hear this. A few points 1) I feel boys learn to be men by watching , listening and encompassing their elders/fathers etc as opposed to explicitly told how to be a man. 2) I feel experience for boys is essential so being exposed to difficult times in order to be "tough" and aim for perfection of character when under fitnah 3) I feel some men want to live a 'balanced life' where they can go on holidays etc so aren't willing to work enough so that their wives don't have to work, or maybe not willing to relocate/travel to not force women to work. Given the right education and work ethic, it is possible to work and have a business/side income to live comfortably. (not that I'm against women working). The other thing is, there is always pressure from parents/society to have luxuries which forces people to want to have more income. I also think a lot of Muslim women want to work as this has be ingrained in them from a very young age. so at least for a few years (before they have children) will want to work. 5) You'd be surprised how may times I've told students to "be patient" "persevere" "don't react", not saying that this is what it is to be a man but simply you should show excellence of character at all times. Also if you ask muslim girls what success is, the overwhelming majority will say a career/job etc and think there is no honour in motherhood... just ranting sorry

[@SK-rt8yn]

I’m very glad you guys are talking about this topic, it’s very important!💪🏾

[@hibatuadam2777]

I love the part about Asiya and Maryam. Highlighting the most important pillars of womanhood, Taqwa,chastity. And nurturing the next generation. Which has being sidelined in today's definitions of womanhood. If u ask someone to name the best women they know today, they will name some doctor,lawyer,businesswoman, actress,pharmacist, scientist,politician etc etc.....its just bills down to some rich woman or popular woman by virtue of her education...and not Taqwa or being a mother. They are even now telling us 30 is the new 20, leave marriage,leave childbirth ,chase the bag,the PhDs because they are the most important then now think of the secondary ones like marriage and childbirth........We are being pushed into madness...and after chasing all that,we are not happy, depression is on the rise,suicide is on the rise. .. and we think we are wiser than our grandparents. ....Haha jokes.

[@Sarararara.]

Why can't u be both though? I mean I understand that a lot of females nowadays do push aside being a mother as being not as valuable but why cant they both be valuable. The ustadh cites only two examples but there are other examples such as Khadija Ra who was not just a mother but also a business woman and the wife of the prophet pbuh. So I don't see the issue of having an education, educating others, and also being someone who holds family as being valuable. And I don't think people should be bringing age into it either. Because people mature and are ready for marriage at different ages, and the reality is, just because you are 20 it does not mean you are ready for marriage. Likewise, just because you are 30 it does not mean you are ready for marriage.

[@hibatuadam2777]

@@Sarararara. no one said u can't blend the two. Am saying don't mock or attack domesticity. Modern feminist narratives attack motherhood, make it seem not worthy ...... And sometimes u have to make a choice between career and abandoning your kids....we are being programmed to care more of our careers and fame and popularity and being out there

[@Sarararara.]

@@hibatuadam2777 Yeah what I am saying is that a lot of the narratives that we come across when this topic comes up is usually from two extremes when we should just be focusing on valuing both as important. So the reason why a lot of Muslims out there are being fooled into extreme feminist narratives is because the views presented to them is of the other extreme. This other extreme comes from people not understanding their religion and following culture instead to understand gender roles. Also its not as black and white as having a career means abandoning your future or present kids. Different people just have different aspirations. So some women prefer to not work while others would. It's also not always true either that just because a female wants or has a career that she doesn't want a family. There are many females with careers who do have successful families.

[@hibatuadam2777]

@@Sarararara. yh true.

[@mehmet20003]

@@Sarararara. most cant thats why. Most wont marry while goint to university or something else bc it would be to much so they push marriage away for the time being. Then when they have their degree which should be around 22-25 they wanna work as well so it woundnt have been for nothing. Pushing marriage away like that is gonna reduce the pool you have for potential partners since women at the end of thekr 20s are less desirable for men bc of their fertility declining. And being a Mother is Islamically more valuable than working and studiying in universitys. Also kadija inhereted a lot and let the men deal with the Business a lot as well its like a business women you would immahine today

[@islamonlywayout]

The best book you can read about the prophet. The simple seerah books. Thanks to ustad Asim khan started readinf again after nearlt half my life doing nothing but chillin. Such a good read. Very good podcast brothers. Keep it up. Good tips too. JazakAllah khairan

[@farhan00]

"You need to do this to your Quran" - ends fraying That was incredible.

[@NA-bb3bq]

Another brilliant podcast, Jazakumallahu khairan. May Allah reward you all immensely

[@zarifmuhtasim]

the only podcast that i watched entirely and also added to watch later

[@lilakhalila6002]

Subhanallah, may Allah SWT reward the goodness you spread for the ummah and the sake of His pleasure. 🤲🏻

[@UmmI943]

This was a great episode mashallah, definitely one of the best, jazakallah khair. The only thing I'd like to have asked/discussed is whether men are providing for their wives generously so they don't feel the need to work.

[@zee8382]

May Allah bless you all & preserve Ustadh Asim. What an amazing & beneficial podcast الْحَمْدُ للِهِ.

[@valiantwisdom4521]

Maa sha Allah, much needed topic. PS. Dilly Hussein, keep up the good work!!!

[@trur0mant1c]

Subhan'Allah......So grateful to God for you brothers.....my own brothers and father wish the worst things on me and I have been on my own since I was 21 through no fault of my own, God is my witness....so although God gave me brothers....and a father and uncles and grandparents.....none of them were/are there for me........ Masculinity is so important to me.....Im looking for nothing like any of the male relatives I ever had...... they're cowards running behind money and control. I so look forward to seeing more of you Masha'Allah

[@richardvanheeswyk7142]

Both husband and wife working to pay for the home is required due to the totally dis functional state of house prices and our collective attitude towards that - regarding homes as investments rather than a basic human need which should be fulfilled as simply as possible.

[@mehmet20003]

Not really you can survive with just the husband working. Sure its harder but its much better for the kids and the family in generell. Also it could also be worse if both work since now you could actually need to pay since you woudnt get state support since you earn a lot more and need to bring your kids to kindergarten

[@h.malik.s]

Excellent choice of guest

[@hodanabdulkadir9019]

Asc thanks dill and aki I really like this ustad I always benefited from him asim khan. You guys always brought the besties never disappointed thank you brothers.

[@1ShySister]

Very beneficial video May Allah reward all of you ameen

[@bilalshaban2432]

Asalam o aliykom Habibi Thank you for that duaa you made for me last night JAK

[@Sadiq00]

Excellent podcast as usual brother's keep up the good work

[@sara17007]

GREAT GREAT GREAT EPISODE

[@Mixedblood82]

Very nice episode

[@AN-fn5ft]

The asl of manliness is the sunnah of Rasulullah saaws, simple. alhamdulillah for the hidayah in Islam.

[@alberxenos]

السَّلاَمُ عَلَيْكُمْ وَرَحْمَةُ اللهِ وَبَرَكَاتُهُ As-Salaamu `Alaykum wa Rahmatullaahi wa Barakaatuhu

[@fishmorecatchmore2787]

My sylheti bros, get this translated inshaAllah so that our people back home may benefit from it. These traits usually come from our hindu past. Please make an effort inshaAllah and jazakAllah khair for the video.

[@az9324]

Jazakallah

[@nailfelagund7508]

Masha'Allah

[@QasimKhan-cb7ou]

Subscribed 👌

[@nasernazamyar9783]

Good topic

[@aali8874]

Wa'alaikum assalaam wa rehmatu'LLAHI wa barakatuh

[@GokuBlack-sn5dr]

sisters won't be happy about this podcast may allah protect you guys and reward you with samosas

[@kemchy3838]

😂

[@Llama-DelRey]

I'm a sister and I've no problem with it. That being said, I am not from the West where the feminist movement is taking over and corrupting the minds of our Muslim sisters. But sometimes, you will find households where it is the husband who requires the wife to work, mainly because of high living costs. I know of some sisters in this position.

[@GokuBlack-sn5dr]

@@Llama-DelRey specifically sisters in the west won't be happy you are right. May allah keep you on the right path

[@hewav9319]

@@Llama-DelRey I am a sister from the West and I have no problem with the video. Don’t generalize…

[@GokuBlack-sn5dr]

@@hewav9319 only feminists

[@AlomM]

Salaams -- There is a weird buzzing sound on the audio track to this episode. Tried other videos and its fine

[@nizal9388]

Hamza tzortsis made a video about it being forbidden to ask her explicitly about her virginity. As a man you can state early while talking to a prospective wife that you are looking for a virgin only without asking her if she is. That gives her the choice to end the thing while maintaining her dignity of not having to answer any question.

[@Neutrino-xw6jl]

Is somebody going to be a legend and timepoint the video?

[@lost_poet_]

0:01 Podcast starts 1:31:30 Podcast Ends You're welcome 🙂

[@jamesawesome5872]

😂😂😂

[@SK-rt8yn]

@@lost_poet_ lol

[@zarifmuhtasim]

@@lost_poet_ truely a legend

[@Itz_HFA]

0:01

[@hibatuadam2777]

15:20 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂

[@jamdoughnut1873]

Regarding the goal of putting women in work being taxation. There is now less children wouldn’t it make more sense to have more people(children) allowing fore more taxation?

[@Abul_kutub]

Children are not definite and are possible where as women are always given

[@ImmiSuccess]

Are the two brothers twins ? They look the same to me

[@KR-rs2wk]

I think they are twins, brother dilly looks 5 minutes younger maybe

[@hamzahr6838]

@@KR-rs2wk "5 mins younger" lol 😂

[@z.3hra908]

we should be treating our cousins like anthor stranger on the street, if their the opposite gender. We have plenty of other family memebers to care for, and to talk to,etc. We wont lose out just from not having relaships with our oppoiste gender cousins. We must treat them like a stranger.

[@Syed_12]

( Do Christians And Jews and "OTHER" non-Muslims go to Heaven? ) Quran 2:62 '' Those who believe (in the Quran) and those who follow the Jewish (scriptures) and the Christians and the Sabians->ANYAllah< Is The Protector Of Monasteries, Churches, Synagogues And The Mosques ) Quran 22:40 [They are] those who have been evicted from their homes without right - only because they say, " Our Lord is God " And were it not that God checks the people, some by means of others, there would have been demolished monasteries, churches, synagogues, and mosques in which the name of God is much mentioned. And God will surely support those who support Him. Indeed, God is Powerful and Exalted in Might. Note: Why did Allah protected Churches and Synagogues if they worship false Allah ? ( Why Are There So Many Different Religions In The World ? ) Quran 5 48 ''...... If God wanted He could have made all of you a single nation.( ie single religion ) But He willed otherwise in order to test you in what He has given you (ie Scriptures) therefore try to excel one another in good deeds. Ultimately you all shall return to God then He will show you the truth of those matters in which you '' >DISPUTE verb < not noun like other religions Islam mean "submission" to God ( The above verse saying is that God will not accept a religion from the >MUSLIM< and the Non-Muslims but total "submission" to God ) Question: How Can Muslim And the Non-Muslim "submit" to the God? Answer: Be kind to other human beings and Do not lie, Do not steal, Do not cheat, Do not hurt others, Do not be prideful and Do the charity work. Note: If you obeyed all the ABOVE Allah-God's moral laws "YOU" submitted to God.( ie Islam mean "submission" to God ) The only people who will enter Paradise those who '' Submitted to God '' ( ie by good deeds ) God does NOT accept your religion of birth but only ''Your Total'' Submission to Him. ( God Allows Interfaith Marriages And Eat Food From the Christian And Jew And Vice Versa ) Quran 5:5 ''This day [all] good foods have been made lawful, and the food of those who were given the Scripture (ie Christian and Jew) is lawful for you and your food is lawful for them. And [lawful in marriage are] chaste women from among the believers (ie Muslim ) and chaste women from among those who were given the Scripture (ie Christian and Jew) before you, when you have given them their due compensation, desiring chastity not unlawful sexual intercourse or taking [secret] lovers. And whoever denies the faith - his work has become worthless and he in the Hereafter will be among the losers.'' Note: > Only < Islam allows interfaith marriages (>14 hundredsSame God< but They are >ALL Corrupt< more or less, some more than others from their original foundational teaching. The older religion are MORE corrupted than newer religion. Question to Muslim and Christian: Does God / Allah only answer your pray ? And God / Allah does not answer non Muslim / non Christian pray? Did Allah '' Canceled '' all other religions Judaism and Christianity? Quran 5:48 '' And We have revealed to you [O Muhammad] the Book in truth, confirming that which preceded it of the Scripture ( ie New and old Testament ) and as a criterion over it. So judge between them by what Allah has revealed and do not follow their inclinations away from what has come to you of the truth. >>>TO EACH OF YOU WE PRESCRIBED A LAW AND A METHODone nation>differ qualified < for to enter Paradise ) On the day of judgement God will ''NOT'' judge humanity bases on Sunni Muslim sect VS Shia Muslim sect ''NOR'' by Muslim VS non-Muslim >but< Doer of Goods VS Doer of Evils. '' YOUR " birth in the Muslim's family is NOT a > qualification < for to enter the Paradise. '' YOUR " religion / sect / foot long beard is NOT a > qualification < for to enter the Paradise. The > qualification < to enter Paradise is > Faith in God and Good Work

[@aba4729]

I cant read all of this, what is the point you are trying to make. Can you summarise in a few words please?

[@hibatuadam2777]

@@aba4729 he is a troll.he is in all Muslim vids comments. Dont mind him

[@Inayahinam]

Again concerning on how this conversation around women and the workplace is romanticised in the language of paternalism, brotherly or husband-ly care and concern - baffled on the level of ignorance all these men have - what a sexist conversation, as if women "need" the permission of men to work!! Also why don't you involve a woman in the discussion? So sexist and frankly unsurprising - DO BETTER

[@Mixedblood82]

14mins. A man should be the provider and the wife should focus o beg. Other. If living in London like me) means one can't afford to do so, then (like me) move north away from my family and friends to (Bradford) where I can live a better and more stress free life and fulfil our duties as living in London is a rip off. If my wife wants to work, her duties as a mother and wife must be the main focus and her work is either a hobbie or whatever allowed reason as long as the work and environment meets Sharia. Due to the reality of free mixing and how men and work environments are not good this has to be taken into consideration where we allow our women to be exposed. My advise for such women is to wear niqab strictly and make sure they are comfortable in submitting to Allah and obeying His commands on how to engage with non mahram men. No giggling nonsense and nice convos etc.

[@hibatuadam2777]

Niqab isn't compulsory

[@mehmet20003]

@@hibatuadam2777 comes down to the opinion and its mostly recomended