Little Fires Everywhere

[@AdventuresofZachandB]

Thanks Helix for sponsoring. Go to Helixsleep.com/zachandb for up to $200 off your mattress and two free pillows!

[@Erin-Thor]

@@Yeu-p9t what about Alistair? LOL! They make a great couple you home wrecker you! 🤣

[@jimmylewis5628]

I'm balling it sounds like not you 2 are gonna spend together at all. You 2are a great thing. I want you 2 to work at you 2stay tog

[@jimmylewis5628]

That video made me ball my ass off. I took it that you are not going to spend with each other like having you working on your selves but you never said anything on about you ,2 still being together and the troubles Stuff should end at the doors when you walk through the door all should your troubles at the door. But to me you made sound to like you 2 are not even in the same bed together. This video really up set me. Really hope that you guys work it out Lete know if maybe. I'm taking it The wrong way some body let me know. Please? Please

[@lloyddavida]

Thought you meant Helix Studios for a minute 😉

[@thepowersproject8659]

May I suggest you both read a book together called "Women are from Venus, Men are from Mars", while originally written for male/female relationships the advice given works for same sex relationships as well. You both communicate differently at times and helping each other to understand that difference and what you need from each other will be of great help. I wish you both continued success.

[@mwaters5134]

Zach: When you listen to Alastair talk through things, you are making it better. Listening is helping.

[@sonnybellotte9061]

Exactly what I was thinking, too.

[@bertfurioli2183]

This is so real. My mate and I have been together for 40 years and we still have these types of conversations. You're going to live and love and struggle until the end. That's life.

[@jamesthompson248]

Beautiful words!!! ❤️

[@Trey79nc]

My Husband & I Will Celebrate 20 Years Together On November 30th! Legally Married Since 6/21/2013

[@jimmyhector6287]

This is such a refreshing conversation and unique content. A lot of comments saying this is tmi for KZbin but it’s so nice to see two men in a relationship have an open and frank discussion about mental health. As men it is often difficult to deal with and talk about our emotions and mental health, even with our partners. I can see in this video that both of you sometimes struggle with verbalizing feelings but eventually understand each other stronger at the end. You are wonderful role models.

[@IHeartBigBlueBubbles]

Literally all you tubers have mental health issues. Maybe turning off the camera and living their lives would be much more beneficial.

[@Sonar_125]

You got a point . That is the very problem why men rarely find real love but only continue to meet random guys for sex and fun. Most of the unrequited love we feel are not because the other person doesnt like you but because of lack of emotions and expressivesness as compared to women. But also i believe that when two people equally feel for each other the emotions and everything automatically floods in.

[@danielhelton4814]

It is so refreshing to see two young, married gay men that can have such an open and honest conversation with each other about emotions. Both their feelings and, of course, how they see their partners feelings as well. We, as men, do want to solve every problem. Always! Lol Especially for the ones we love, and when we can’t, we take it upon ourselves to make it a personal failing. I guess it’s in our DNA 🤷🏻‍♂️ Focusing on ourselves feels selfish when it’s actually the best thing possible to help our husband by proxy ❤️ Thank you for showing such an honest, real world example of what it takes to truly love another man. Thank you 🙏🏼

[@kd8199]

@@IHeartBigBlueBubbles - it’s all people.

[@tallactordude]

Real talk with Alistair and Zach. Being in a relationship is a complex thing, and there are countless issues to work out on a daily basis (he says, as though he had any experience with being in a relationship). Finding balance can take a lot of work, but ultimately the work is worth it, I would think. And when that journey is based in love, it’s even more worth it.

[@JosephCompnotta]

The best fulltime job you will ever do

[@MrErmielynn]

I love how when he says he loves Dude's excitement the Dude yawns right at that moment. 🤣

[@rjedwards7428]

"Sometimes people just need to vent" is a lesson I had to learn in my own relationship. I'm a "fixer" too, and when my partner just needs to vent I have to rely on my knowledge of how smart and skilled he is to remind myself that he's not asking for me to fix something for him, he's just sharing. Since figuring that out, and talking about it like you two did, we've gotten into the habit of prefacing the conversation with "I think I just need to vent about this..." When that happens, we know the other doesn't need solutions, they just need an ear. Without being super introspective, though, it's not easy to know when you need to say that, which is where knowing your partner's abilities and trusting that they'll instead preface the conversation with "I could use your help on something..." enables you to better be there for each other. I may just be projecting a bit, but it seemed like you guys were having that same lightbulb moment my partner and I had, and maybe I just kinda felt like venting about it ;)

[@ryanblack2986]

Makes perfect sense. I'm the fixer too.😁

[@calblue8694]

same

[@111_23]

was going to comment exactly this! excellent advice

[@pauloesteves4380]

@@calblue8694 6

[@pauloesteves4380]

@@ryanblack2986 h

[@Druidh31]

🤣🤣🤣 A- “I like how excited you get about things…” Z- yawns.

[@robertchuter884]

Love Alastair, what a kind, genuine and thoughtful person.

[@neilmurray6943]

A sweet sweet man!

[@bonnetlid]

He is perfect

[@AdventuresofZachandB]

Should be putting out videos each week over the next month. I promise they wont all be this long haha

[@adzgee7]

Thats good Zach mate. Look forward to it.

[@joelbuchanan471]

That was a little heart wrenching, I wish only the best for you guys. I know it can't be easy, but try to take some of the pressure off yourselves. It's plenty rough out here right now, we have to just believe it will be better. Zach and Alastair, you guys are so good for each other. There is real love there. Does Alastair get counseling benefits through work? It might be good to have a few visits and see if that helps. With much love!!!

[@awfrancis1967]

This was upsetting! I’m hearing one person say that the other has mental issues when you both do. So sad. Please don’t open your relationship I feel like Zach is heading there.

[@momo-bc6zb]

I love long video! They are the best for me

[@MiJoOc76]

Couples Therapy #4 … #5? 😄👍🏽

[@Jermbuf14]

This is what a loving marriage looks like. To love someone is to want to take away their pain, but also learning to let them take care of themselves in the dark times. It's a hard balance, because love gets in the way and makes you want to fix and for your partner to be happy and healthy, not realizing that you can't do that for them unless they can for themselves. Then that causes even more stress because the stress is shared. They will be fine. Communication is honestly key.

[@josepsanroma7881]

Two men having a real conversation. That’s all. Simple and difficult and rare at the same time. Keep talking because that makes you stronger! Hugs from Barcelona!

[@AdventuresofZachandB]

I guess maybe I see it different because I put it together, but I’m so confused how some of y’all see this and get seriously concerned this is pointing to the end. Like, what? Remember this is real life please. We got married. I HOPE something like this wouldn’t be the end of our relationship haha. Our foundation wouldn’t be too strong, would it?

[@chasekittles9055]

Couples disagree, couples fight, couples get cold sometimes. It is when all of this stuff stops happening that you need to worry.

[@billlee536]

Zach, your facial expressions looked sad and mad at the same time…..just concerned, I am sure you both will work through your communication issues. The key is to keep on communicating and listening

[@stephaniewenzlick1044]

You guys are in a unique position because you do give us the privilege of seeing some of your personal thoughts and feelings. Keep talking, venting, supporting and loving each other not for us, but for yourselves as individuals and as a team.....

[@dugald56]

This is normal in a real marriage. Especially in the first decade as you work your relationship out. It’s a long term project not a happy ever after fix. You ‘feel’ good in your videos. After 42 of marriage and further time living together, we are STILL figuring stuff out. Given what you’ve had to deal with in the last 18 months or so, Zach - and heaven knows what Alastair has to deal with about which your public know nothing. Plus deployment issues. You guys are incredible. And, most importantly, you’re talking! I’m crap at that; my wife is the wise one. Showing this is very brave - but great for others who’ve been seduced by the shit purveyed by Hollywood to see a real loving couple working through the mess that is a real marriage. Love and hugs to you both. ❤️

[@sa12wi]

Married 24 years. This conversation is respectful, healthy and shows the love between you. Thank you for sharing your real life ❤️

[@garyhinton1609]

How ironic that you guys are bumping along on the road. This is a perfect metaphor for what every couple goes through. You are always building to make the union stronger. Love you guys

[@RyanRuark]

Change the verb “help” to “support.” Support comes in many forms - sometimes it *is* idle conversation that doesn’t go anywhere. I’ve been through some of my own stuff with mental health recently and a very good friend (who sent me your channel 💕) was there for me in that way. For me, it helped me explore the ‘terrain’ in my mind so I *could* come up with a plan for getting better that I felt *ownership* of. I was a cartographer trying to come up with a map - talking in circles actually helped me spot the peaks and valleys.

[@AdventuresofZachandB]

I think you’re the first one to say this, but I’ve seen a couple others say that too. One of the better comments. “Support” not “help,” got it

[@carloslodoza9931]

There’s a home like feeling in your videos that sometimes I don’t even realize that 20 odd minutes have passed by. They feel raw and true in the sense that y’all talk about real issues like mental health and relationship issues and keeping the topics as honest as y’all can with your audience. Also the scenery and the way you capture moments takes me back home in New Mexico in terms of tone and the ambiance. And weather the subject matter is something serious or just another day in the life, it’s always something to be enjoyed. Thanks guys!

[@edju9968]

I often realize I feel like I'm in the room with them, they get so personal and are just being themselves and authentic so I have to remember OH yeah, I'm watching this on the computer and not in the same room.

[@dalmatianluvr]

Very well said, Carlos! Thanks.

[@KT-xl8bw]

Alastair :"I like how you get excited about things" Zach: ....yawn.... LOL!

[@jettstap]

I was laughing at that to

[@phezd6937]

The underlying message from your channel has always been LOVE and I believe that will carry you to the next happy place. 😎💚🔥

[@AdventuresofZachandB]

Love that

[@jvperry2162]

Love fuels your relationship "vehicle" on life's bumpy road. Keep checking the tire pressure ?

[@jimmylewis5628]

When you get set settled let us know.. would love things where you are going through a vlog when you can

[@jimmylewis5628]

Oops sorry about that. We love all love you am and want you to be okay we are all concerned about yourself and where you want

[@jimmylewis5628]

We are all Loving you whit all of what you and have your beautiful and looking forward to seeing you XOXo

[@jt2844]

Love the honesty and communication between you two. It's great that you both are able to talk about yourselves and each other in such a raw, frank manner.

[@donpM.A.D.4412]

Love you both. Wish I could have been there years ago ! Keep up your talking together!! I'm 67 God 🙏 bless u BOTH. Never loose one another!!.

[@Nat-kg8gd]

This is so honest and nice to see. In my own life, I have found that asking or being asked "do you want to vent or do you want advice/problem-solving?" really helps set the stage for the conversation.

[@Yngpblo]

To be this vulnerable and transparent and communicate so well with one another the way you two did in this video was everything!!! and then to share it with your youtube fam is amazing.. I just know you two will be together for a very long time.. Love you guys so much .

[@ImaginaryMdA]

Oh my god, this is so real! The emotion is so true and pure. It's amazing honestly.

[@steverdms]

All I hear in the noise of the details is how much they really do love and care for each other.

[@AdventuresofZachandB]

Of course. Having difficult talks and working on issues doesn’t point to love lost or an impending breakup. I wish other people commenting would see this haha.

[@tonyanderson6235]

Stay open and talk and listen don’t always have to have a plan for everything

[@sherrysmith2681]

You’re experiencing the reality of sharing your lives. As a couple, you share everything..you share your social life, your financial life, your intimate life, your laundry, your chores, your vehicles, your pups, your families, your food, your furniture…everything. There’s no way to do that and not get to each other at times. It’s the love that keeps you grounded and moving past those days. All the best to you both ❤️

[@mjohnson9563]

great example of effective communications between two individuals in a committed relationship based on love. No screaming or shouting, just talk and a chance to get to know each other better.

[@ronaldminks2031]

This is what happens when you have honest conversations with your partner,I was with my partner for 43 years, we never fought we talked our problems out and truly loved each other until the day he died, the last woods he said to me was that he loved me. Life is short so enjoy it all with each other

[@thomasgriffith2953]

How awesome is that. You guys talk ... really talk to each other. That's what keeps a marriage strong. To share what you're feeling even when it's difficult instead of letting it get pent up. Learning about each other is a constant process. With that sharing comes learning and with that learning comes a greater understanding and a deeper love. Never stop learning. Never stop sharing. 👍😉

[@anthonydalton9383]

Serious conversation that all couples need. You'll get through it you love each other it's obvious ❤️

[@nghtguy13]

I love these so much. They make me think I'm watching an in-depth documentary. So so good. 🤗🥰🥰🥰🥰

[@brianjdillon9262]

you guys are an inspiration. I love listening to you guys talk to each other. Zach's voice is so soothing.

[@corytito5097]

Its Alastair's heartfelt genuity & Zach's brutal authenticity I like about your personalities. This was excellent - as tough as it was. Thank you guys 💚

[@tonys.7712]

Hey guys thank you for sharing your lives I really appreciate your sincerity. Always keep communication open and never go to bed upset with each other you both are my favorite couple

[@Joe-fi2ok]

Seeing two people go through the same thing that my partner and I struggle with is comforting. It sounds weird but I appreciate the honesty and have been on both sides of your conversations. Love to you both.

[@waynesmith3908]

Zach looked a little too tired to be driving. I really love that you talk out and communicate how you are feeling with each other. That is a recipe for a long and loving marriage. But yes at the same time couples are individuals as well and they really do need some time apart from each other to think about stuff and resolve issues. Absence really does make the heart grow fonder.

[@sambroughton2912]

Thank you for posting vlogs again, never apologise for the length the longer the better IMO. I hold my hands up to you both for including your car therapy, I feel for you both and hope you can keep talking and continue loving. Zachery you have such sad eyes like a puppy I just wanna hug you both. Alastair I can’t wait to see new content on your channel, also I can’t believe how much your nephew has grown 💜

[@Craiger62]

One thing I know for SURE out of this car convo IS that you two LOVE each other SO MUCH! This is true love

[@JW-ev3em]

He's wanting you to just listen and nod without thinking you have to try to fix the situation. Just listen and agree with him. ❤️

[@rayusa685]

"Really the best way that I could take care of you is to take care of myself." This is a very true statement and I agree to it 💯%. We have to take good care of our physical, psychological, mental, and emotional health so we could take good care of others. I love and enjoy your serious talk. Posted from Los Angeles, California🇺🇲

[@stpu22]

Your dog is very cute watching you pick up the fluff! Love how honest you guys are with each other. Thank you for sharing your life.

[@jaykoda2188]

It’s good to talk to each other and to just support each other when each one of you guys or down or something. Communication and listening is the key in a relationship

[@MiguelPlata26]

Thank you for sharing this deep personal conversation with your SO. I loved it 💕.

[@anthonydalton9383]

Thank you to the heavens, a new video of the two of you being real. Two of the most real people on Social Media. I've missed seeing you guys, had withdrawals 🤣!

[@jorgereveron8142]

Such a relatable video as I can see traits of myself in you two. Thanks for being vulnerable and raw with us. Thanks for talking about mental health. Definitely support counseling for everyone, especially after the year and a half we've been through. Hope you guys are doing well, listen to each other, and take time to focus on your individual selves.

[@tikettle]

This car ride convo reminds me so much of my wife and I. I’m a “doer” and my love language is Acts of Service. I get paranoid and anxious when I think she’s unfulfilled or “bored” and unstimulated with life - I get riled up and it activates my fight or flight reaction. I also overthink like, EVERYTHING. I am also learning to just listen and absorb without getting anxious or starting to plan. I don’t know how to do that either, Zach. We started couples counseling like, the first year of marriage because I knew stuff would come up to place a wall between us. It’s helped immensely. I think our relationships are also similar because the foundation is love and a lot of care for each other. It’s important to remember that when we are in the throes of anxiety after a circular conversation where both are getting more and more frustrated. Hang in there and remember/focus on the moments where you simultaneously think “we are meant for each other.” Much love from Michigan xoxo

[@augustviolin]

wow, i'm also all about acts of service, you described exactly how i feel. i also relate so much to zach, they're such good guys

[@crc4339]

Love how REAL y’all are. A genuine and loving relationship.💕

[@ismaaeldieng7912]

I very much appreciate all the videos you do like this. It's rare that people/couples are willing to be completely raw on camera like this and truly dive into their thoughts and feelings as if we're right there as the fly on the wall. Not only does it give a lot of perspective, but it's a good reminder and example of why it's good to put all the "little things" or even just how your feeling all out on the table. So thank you.

[@stephaniewenzlick1044]

I have been following you guys for several months and this is the most raw, open and honest video that I have seen you post. Marriage and self worth is hard, especially being a military family. You need to realize that you are both strong individuals for yourself, but as a team and family you are stronger. Take a bit of time for individual interests,!to work on your mental health, and regroup to talk, vent and discuss. Realize that each of you can bend a little to be flexible and supportive for each other, but continue to be a source of comfort and strength when needed. It’s growing as an individual and a couple, and I have faith that you will both find your right path, and that gives me hope for a more peaceful life for you both.

[@sameppink9401]

I know exactly what you guys are talking about with that spiral. It’s like you want to be proactive in helping the other but being on the receiving end of that is actually really stressful and demoralizing. My boyfriend used to constantly try to tell me what I should be doing to improve my mood and it always just felt like he was constantly telling me what I was doing wrong.

[@MG-er3co]

Are you guys still together.

[@Dimank0]

Adding those more serious parts to your videos makes both you and Allistair come across as a lot more genuine than any of the other "KZbin couples". You're still weird for sharing your life with strangers though, but then again so am I for watching it.

[@danieljwilkerson1]

Now this is the type content everyone needs! You two are helping so many others while you're helping yourselves! These kind of candid conversations free others to be conscious and aware in their relationships. It also shows that youtubers are human too and everyday isn't lollipops and rainbows (haha)! During this video, I found myself thinking about my own relationship and the need for similar conversations. Thank you for this!! Please keep convos like this coming!! Love you guys and THANK YOU!

[@keeferbeach]

Thank you BOTH for always being so real. Kudos

[@kennethkauzlaric8948]

I think I just went through marriage counseling. You two are the most honest couple on YT. Sometimes, I feel like I'm interrupting a conversation between you two. I love that you are so open, it truly reflects a caring relationship. Love you two.

[@brownjoseph415]

I have so much respect for you guys after watching this video. So many times we see fluff videos from couples that makes it appear that life is always good and you are in always in some lovey/dovey state of mind 24/7. But the truth is loving someone and caring about someone isn’t always the fluff you see on youtube a lot of times and that you are going to fight you’re going to feel whatever you feel. You are both individuals who experience the world differently even though you are a couple and even though you are in love with each other. Everyone has mental health issues and some of us handle our issues better than others. And when two people combine lives they carry over the baggage of their mental issues and those are the things that can break or make a couple. You guys don’t know how much you have helped so many people just by letting us take a small glimpse into your very personal life with this video.I thank you and God bless and God keep you.

[@amandadevereux1911]

This was really nice to hear in the sense of just kind of going through similar things. My husband just got out of the army this past April. I moved out with him where he was stationed for all of last year. We've been together for almost 7 years and married for almost 2 this year. Going from military life to civilian life that we are learning has been rough. We loved the life of the military in the sense that it was an experience. It has shaped us. We've had good moments and some rough moments during the time. We both miss our group of friends where we were and the life. But we are trying to find the parts of us before he joined per say and try and combine them both I guess lol. Thank you guys for this. Love watching your videos.

[@jankinzett5847]

The love you two share will get you through this. Leaving your current posting will be a new start as well.

[@barrybarry5305]

Hang in. This pandemic has been hard on everyone. Stronger together

[@Aaron-px3op]

Love is love! I love to sleep so mattresses are important to me. Alastair let the puppies sleep with you! I can’t sleep with out my pups in my bed haha 🐾🐾

[@ScottJohnson-bh8hv]

I just want to say thank you to you both, and for a couple different reasons. A: for just sharing so much of your lives and your relationship online. We have no right or entitlement to your lives, but you still share it and that’s so special and vulnerable. B: for sharing both the good and “bad”. I think too often people idolize media couples and only see the good. Being able to see such a beautiful couple truly communicate, and work through difficult things while still loving and respecting each other is so amazing and sadly so rare. Love you both

[@joesphsimmons335]

I'm glad that y'all show some of the rough conversations instead of being fake and just showing the good times. Thank y'all for being your real and authentic selves.

[@joefinley-z3e]

I learn a lot about life watching u 2 talk! Thank you so much for sharing your relationship with the world, I feel u help me be a better me. Thank you and God bless!

[@gotrojansfighton]

Y'all. I think we can appreciate Zach and Alistair sharing some of the arguments they have been having, but I don't think it's our place to weigh in. Appreciate you two.

[@cj2565]

Most couples that didn't/don't make it is b/c they didn't have the courage, the strength, the trust in their relationship or love to have these gut level, honest conversations and communications. May God continue to Bless y'alls Marriage & Love! You two are so good together & for each other. Thank you for being willing to share such a part of your relationship with us. Thank you!

[@timothywhite9992]

I just want y’all to be happy. We all have stuff and I truly believe y’all are better together. Stop over analyzing everything ❤️😘🌈

[@antonioizquierdo5818]

Communication is the key to any relationship. You guys seem to have a good grasp on that. ❤️y’all

[@wandaaustinjones6293]

I Love the honesty in your videos. Communication is the key so keep working on it.

[@jerrystone9013]

thank you both for not sugar coating a relationship and informing others about the other side of a relationship that people do not talk about and they really need to talk about more god bless

[@baruchavraham1939]

I love how "real" y'all are. Honestly. If all soulmates could communicate they way you guys do, more relationships would survive and thrive. What ya all have together is a real gift. Every couple reaches the "5 year stretch / 7 year stretch" and these types of things always pass. Y'all will definitely make it. Keep the faith guys!

[@simont9833]

Another dose of reality conversations. Amazed how much you share but appreciative of the honest conversation.

[@shanarayfield3028]

I almost cried. Please stay together!! I’m praying for y’all! Good luck on your next move. Xoxoxoxo

[@COTBNFT]

Thank you so much for sharing your lives. Life can be difficult in and of itself, the addition of mental health issues makes the journey more complicated. Keeping the lines of communication open and having honest dialog about your struggles both individually and as a couple serves to make your relationship stronger. I do so love tuning in and catching a glimpse into your story - you two are so adorable together, and I wish you a long, happy and fulfilled life together!

[@RocaNation365]

This was such a great video capturing what real relationship conversations look like and how to articulate your concerns and things to work on together. Love this and God bless yall!

[@KarmaSP568]

i am single but ur conversation makes total sense.. the constant burden of taking responsibilty of someone u love and the will to help them but dnt know how to do that.. its a very scary cycle ending up affecting both parties lil by lil.. So thankful for being a part of this conversation..And the talk on Mental health is very important.. thanks guys... reli thankkssss

[@KarmaSP568]

commenting the second time cuz after that deep conversation,,u guys transitioned into a more happier tones like you two are influencers and about feet and touchier... now thats what i love sm abt u guys,, cuz at the end of the day..with all ups and downs,, u two are strong partners and it just shows lovee...damn.. u two are wonderful

[@tncannon30]

Guys, I'm sorry you're both in pain. About ten years ago I came across a quote by Denis Waitley. My family was going through a lot with a cancer diagnosis for my wife and we had two small kids at home. I took the quote and applied it like a filter to every part of my life. The quote helped me to compartmentalize the things going on and spend my limited energy on the things I could change, and leave the other things to work themselves out. The quote is this; "Change the changeable. Accept the unchangeable. Remove yourself from the unacceptable." One of you mentioned making a list to tackle things one at a time so you don't feel overwhelmed, which I think is great. Once you make your list, apply the three mantras from the quote to what you've written down, and start working on the changeable, knock those out and mark them off your list. You'll feel good because you're making your list smaller, plus it's a natural way to get a release of endorphins (bonus). There are many things in our lives that we can't change, no matter how much we want or need them to. So, accept the unchangeable. Don't spend anymore of your time and energy on the things that can't or won't change. Give yourself permission to not dwell on these things. Then there are those things that we can't tolerate, remove them or yourself from the situation. I've watched your channel off and on over the past several years and I've witnessed the depth of love you have for each other. Commutation is key as you both commented in this video. I'll tell you that early in my marriage, my wife would tell me about things that were bothering her or problems she was having at work and I wanted to fix them immediately. I couldn't understand why my wife would get so worked up when I would try to fix those things. Finally, I realized she just needed to 'vent' or talk things out. I asked her to preface these needed talking sessions with 'I need to tell you something, but I don't need you to do anything about it. I just need to talk it out.' That statement let me off the hook for fixing things and allowed me to be present in listening and offering supportive comments. She felt better after these 'talks' and I didn't feel the stress of needing to fix anything. Blah, blah, blah. I hope my lengthy message finds its way to you and that it helps to clear some of those conversations that feel like landmines for you both. Good luck! Anything worth having is worth the hard work to keep, and as a stranger looking in from the outside, you have something together that escapes most people their whole lives!!

[@ZJ-kl4hu]

I screenshotted that quote you shared. Powerful. Thank you!

[@latewbowthomas]

the way I have the same exact problems at home with the people I live with has my jaw on the floor. if you read this and I really hope you do, this session really helped me understand the other points of view in my life. Definitely taking a lot of things from this video so thank you!

[@atomzero29]

Love you guys - thanks for sharing. I’m not married, but I have a close friend and have the SAME issues. It’s extremely difficult sometimes, but the enduring friendship is worth it. Thanks again for sharing.

[@keithlucas8865]

The issues you have are the same for many. Me and my husband go through the same things and we learned long ago to give each other space to work through our issues by ourselves when needed and together when needed. It's all about balance between control issues and self care!

[@chanlon1368]

Admitting you don’t know is the first step. Being able to communicate and listen are powerful tools in a relationship. Much love to you both amd thank you for being real and honest.

[@matthewmichaelmoschella9548]

This is raw and real and i am here for it my dudes! It takes some balls to do this on camera but the best lessons we learn in life are through the lens and perspectives of others. That was like one giant internet therapy session. I guarantee you that this video will be helping others in their relationships with their partners as well. Life is messy. And you gotta dance with the devil before you can see heaven. Keep communicating and talking it out. There are millions of couples out there that can’t even get to that point. All the best to ya!

[@apocalypseplague67]

I really appreciate how open and honest you are with your videos. It's helped me interact in my own relationships a lot and I always walk away thinking about the stuff you guys talked about.

[@robsutherland5744]

The quality and consistency of these videos absorb me almost to the point of mild hallucination. Thank you for the honesty and intimacy.

[@augustviolin]

that's so well said... mild hallucination

[@ninaarias1891]

Hi, i wish for both of you to be able to thesame where are youtwo in 10 years? Pleade be happy and work the small problem yours seem to have great communication before,i am a old lady been married for the last 37 yeard and we all go to those phases,at best you both know what the problem is,fix or i will haunt you !!!! Be happy

[@adzgee7]

Love it when you upload. Couple goals right there 😁 2 nice lads.

[@AdventuresofZachandB]

Appreciate the support!

[@adzgee7]

@@AdventuresofZachandB your welcome

[@mtjsrc1]

The hardest part of a relationship under stress, is truly articulating feelings and then deciding just how big the issues really are. Blurry, confusing and poorly understood issues can only blow up into an unfixable situation. This sounded more like two guys just growing tired of each other, I hope you guys can find neutral ground to be happy together.

[@johniii8147]

It's definitely not heading in the right direction right now.They are now dealing with the reality of actually dealing with each other on a daily basis vs remote. Real life has kicked in .

[@tallen3057]

I dont think they're tired of each other; I think it's more that they want the best for each other so much that they're not considering whatever for their relationship. They need to balance personal time with relationship time. Being in a relationship doesn't mean you need to be together 24/7, and it doesnt mean you need to always be apart. It doesnt mean you should always be focusing on your S.O., or that you should only focus on yourself. Marriage is finding that balance. It's a thing that's meant to add to your life, not to strip away your time and energy.

[@johniii8147]

@@tallen3057 Agreed like I said they on now dealing with the reality of it on daily basis and have issues. It’s actually pretty serious. The need to get some serious counseling on both of their parts or this is going to spiral downhill pretty quickly

[@winterkyomoon7096]

@@johniii8147 You've seen less than 30 minutes of a slice of their life without a lot of context and you're all doomey about it. Relax, the fact that they were able to have that conversation, learn some things about how the other is feeling, and see where they might need to adjust how they approach each other. It shows how they are working on things just like everyone is. That wasn't a fight or even an argument it was some talking out of some things they both needed to say and didn't know how. They are communicating that's more than a lot of people can manage. Just remember we see what they share and we don't see most of their lives, the good and the bad. They are not characters on a TV show.

[@johniii8147]

@@winterkyomoon7096 Actually they have made many videos. They just got issues to sort out if the marriage is going to last. That's obvious. And i know how these things can go in general watching relationships. Why do you think so many fail? But agreed discussing it helps that chances.

[@dooby562]

Not too long at all, thank you for sharing. Try to be gentle on yourselves and with each other. You are both amazing people.

[@allanabiva1557]

I love your videos, both of you are very good in expressing your thoughts and feeling enough. And the things you talk about for some reason gives me so much peace that puts me to sleep at night. It fills my days when I feel empty and unfulfilled with how my day went. I concur with one of the comments below… it just feels home.

[@h.l.silets6893]

This was so real and fresh and raw. This is a GREAT video!! It shows everyone how couples need to really talk things out and LISTEN to what the other is trying to say.

[@dontravis5657]

Simply put, I love your love for each other; it is so evident always. You guys were blessed to find your soulmate in this crazy and challenging world. I wish you two the best the world can offer, always.

[@henniesenekal8210]

By lending an ear and being a sound board for a partner, is a great start is helping. Getting anything off the chest is liberating and a great start to healing from any type off issue. Your lives are like a hand woven carpet. Individually a thread does not mean much but when you look at the whole carpet, it not only looks great but it also serves a great purpose. I love you both and please keep the camera rolling.

[@Je1St2]

Wow. Thank you for sharing. It’s great seeing two people in love, willing to talk through the tough issues, and work on your relationship together with mutual respect and support. It’s not an easy thing to do. Kudos to you both for working together to figure it out. 👍

[@Mirrigold]

The fact you even acknowledge the need for this type of conversation puts you already ahead of the game. So many people just clam up and don't accept there's reasons to discuss issues or work out what's going on in your own headspace as an individual before working on the different space as a couple. Someone else mentioned it in the comments, but SUPPORT each other rather than trying to HELP because you're on the outside. The only person who knows what help an individual needs most is that individual. Other people can help support them to find it, but can't or shouldn't imho, try to do it for them. You guys will do good because you do talk and you do acknowledge that you're both flawed, as is everyone. Also gorgeous editing as usual :)

[@OliviaRehrig]

I love the way you two talk about things together. Just listen to each other and take some time to yourselves as needed. And in the end all of these talks will lead to a much stronger relationship and marriage between you two many years down the road❤️

[@1967sfoman]

A partner and I had a similar dynamic and what I found helped was when one of us would vent the other one wouldn't immediately offer suggestions or opinions. But later the one doing the listening would write down how they felt about what they heard and offer suggestions on paper. It helped us immensely. ✌and💜 from Oakland,California

[@kenkalstein9424]

Worth more than words can say...the conversation you guys had in the truck...the conversation, in all honesty is the one I never had with my ex. You guys, and your videos, are so on target. Love you.

[@lswinea224]

You can see the love you guys have for each other is genuine and marriage has its ups and downs. You will work things out and both be the better for it. Take time for yourself and learn abd grow from it. Love you guys.

[@bobtuckey2409]

Hey guys I really admire how well you communicate with each other. Keep it up and your relationship will endure.

[@michaelcolman722]

I just discovered your channel and wowza this convo landed deep in my heart. Very recently, I left my partner of two years (and the first and only person I have ever loved) because of exactly what you two are talking about. When Alistair was talking about energy... oof... I related so much. I felt like I would use just slightly more energy everyday than I recovered until I had absolutely no reserves left. When anxiety or depression would seep in, I didn’t have any ability to usher those destructive thoughts away anymore. But I refused to be a burden to my partner (who was also struggling with mental health) in any way whatsoever. And telling him that I wasn’t doing well made him stressed and sad with a touch of that “what can I do to fix it?!” reaction... because he loved me. And I loved him very, very much. I just wanted him to be happy. Eventually, I knew I would need to find a way to recover or I wasn’t going to... continue. I wish everyday I could have successfully figured out how to do that together with him. I couldn’t. And I left. He didn’t understand. I don’t either, I suppose. I don’t get to talk to him anymore. Love is not all you need, I guess. Or at least it wasn’t for us. Thanks for letting me vent. Your video made me feel some feelings. All that to say, you two obviously love each other very much and don’t want to be a burden when you know that the other may already be struggling... just don’t let it simmer. Don’t keep digging into those energy/fortitude reserves day after day. Eventually they will run out and it may be hard to tell how close you are to the bottom of the barrel. A therapist has helped me so much (and my pretty crappy insurance still only charges me $10 a session, so don’t let that fear stop you from looking into it). Having a trained professional to communicate stuff like “I feel like I am slowly running out of life force” or “I don’t know how to NOT make a plan to fix an obvious problem. It’s like he doesn’t even WANT to be better” can be life (and relationship) changing. I can’t imagine how much work this channel is. Thank you for doing it. It has come to mean a lot to me in a very short period of time. I wish you both joy, peace, and fulfillment as you press on together.

[@MrGodlyone]

Love you guys and Thanks for being open and honest and sharing your life with us. 🤠

[@Kiwi_2001]

First, awesome storytelling (as always); love the format change when the music kicks in. Second, whoa... fly-on-the-wall honesty is real brave! Third, common complaint in so many relationships: "I don't want you to fix it, just listen." Fourth, when all is said and done, you can only 'fix' yourself.

[@eddieindallas]

There is never going to be an end to “stuff” happening in your life, it’s life and what makes you know you’re alive. Thinking you know how to solve every issue that comes up in your husband’s or your life is self defeating because it sets you up for unrealistic expectations. Seeking couples counseling is not a red flag for a failed relationship; it just helps nudges you back on the road that you have veered off. If you truly love each other and I believe that you do, the work is hard but the reward is so worth it.

[@egalitarian-rex]

You’re having the right conversation and each of you is genuinely attempting to communicate honestly and clearly. As individuals and as a couple you would benefit from couples counseling. Therapist’s can help you improve communication and avoid the frustration that comes with circular thinking.

[@blueboi5000]

Hey... Take time n don't stress the small stuff.. it's great your both so open to us... Relationships are hard work let alone having it in the public eye. Maybe ya can try this.... "Alone time every day or once a week." Just one or two hours alone time. Take care n don't stress.

[@johnlepine9337]

I really appreciate you guys sharing this. It was extremely raw and honest. Several things you both said resonated with me. VERY helpful. You’re both awesome men.

[@mjspringer80]

Love the raw, genuineness of their conversation! I think sometimes you have to stop and think about each other’s feelings and when conversations is needed, like “venting” that sometimes you don’t need a solution for every problem or situations that arises. It’s just knowing that you have that other person that will just listen and not be like, “oh I need to do something to fix this! The reaction will always be, “I want to help!” Trying to help can and will make it worse. When all that person wants is to “just talk” or “let it out” It does get easier over time! Remember, there’s always going to be challenges, disagreements and etc…that there, will make the relationship grow stronger, knowing you have each to listen. 😊🙂