HFY Story :They have edge cases & And then there were the Americans |2403~Deathworld, War and Humans

[@FallenKnightXIII]

Xenos: Humans are weak. USA: You talk a lot of shit for someone in freedom distance.

[@lloydkeith3061]

Hahaha!!!

[@Volvodian]

Second story doesn't even mention our space-born F-22. The kid is getting upgrades. "Would you intercept me.....I'd intercept me."

[@nightkil13r]

The Kid, Now AI Powered. Edit: the more i think about it, the more terrifying it is.

[@pieceofschmidtgamer]

@@nightkil13r Oh dear god! What have we done?!

[@VadulTharys]

LOL seems someone else likes Habitual Line crosser.

[@TransbianOwl]

You have earned the like Also lets not forget inbound Grandpa Buff with his new warp engines... he started the last major conflicts, he's gonna start this one too.

[@Volvodian]

@@TransbianOwl The Buff is forever. He'll see us through. Proton torpedoes as well.

[@tknier88]

Just remember, Don't f with our boats

[@homoerectus6953]

Dad's proud son, the boats are life..... England Probably.

[@tristanbentz224]

Hello fellow HLC fan but the big question is would you intercept me id intercept me

[@KouuToriProductions]

Quackbang, out.

[@Twokeeshonds]

Epic!

[@furiouskaiser9914]

​@@tristanbentz224 For the love of all that is holy, LET THE KID EAT!

[@KaiHenningsen]

2nd story: they were afraid of the guns. They _should_ have been afraid of the political concepts.

[@brentmartin6833]

I think they were, but enough beings already understood what that would mean for them & their families and hightailed it to claim asylum. The guns were secondary but worrisome because if the alien rulers couldn't contain America/Humans they'd have to contend with the ideals within all of our various governments.

[@awsomegaming9009]

I would give you a like, but it would ruin the 69

[@JosephYeet-t4x]

I love how one of the first comments I see is “DONT TOUCH THE BOATS” 😂

[@tarrantwolf]

'Merica, feck yeah, traveling the stars to bring freedom to everyone!

[@Nicmadis]

"Please help, they have enslaved us and even now force my family to work on a planet made almost entirely of oil!"

[@Banthisyoutube-zs6sx]

​@@Nicmadisfreedom doesn't run on giod intentions alone......keep drilling and collecting that overtime pay.

[@europademon]

Don't touch, the boats.

[@MrClarissacain]

And F22 never gets to play ..

[@europademon]

@@MrClarissacain just the 🦬💩 vegan air to air diet of balloons and ufos.

[@elriccrim]

@@MrClarissacain Someday he will get an interception.

[@markfergerson2145]

Perfect pairing of stories- in many ways America itself is an edge case…

[@loganshaw4527]

England is so proud. England:That is my boy!

[@darwinskeeper421]

I was shocked to learn that the term "White Water Navy" was a real thing. Apparently these aren't naval forces trained to operate on fast running rivers, particularly those with something called "rapids". They are meant for operation in the Arctic Ocean.

[@NerdLife4Life]

TIL, I guess?

[@jon-paulfilkins7820]

How to make the rest of the world facepalm so hard that they get concussion, a news report starts with "A man in florida". Hell even half the USA starts going "Oh FFS, this ain't gonna make us look good". 😜

[@goldengryphon]

@poiujnbvcxdswq It's the rogue iguanas falling from trees in a freeze that always get to me. I remember (old person voice) the days when there weren't rogue iguanas.

[@supremecaffeine2633]

​@poiujnbvcxdswq Something insane?

[@KaiHenningsen]

@poiujnbvcxdswq "A New Yorker in Florida has once again failed to pay his lawyers."

[@Wastelandman7000]

From Florida, yep, pretty much LOL

[@GeorgeOrwell-yz6zx]

At least FL has real police. FAFO in FL at your own risk.

[@Tiewaz]

First story makes sense. Of course we have edge cases. On both ends of the spectrum. The ones on the right end are just as dangerous as the ones on the left if left to their own devices. Second story. It'd be dangerous to try to prevent humans gaining any particular technology by force. It just makes us figure it out on our own, and then we'd have a grudge and justification for being the nightmare they feared to begin with.

[@Wastelandman7000]

Yeah, we humans got here by rando geniuses and even the non geniuses are good at reverse engineering.

[@n7honeybadger103]

Don't. Touch. The. Boats. That is all.

[@malesaelisheva5417]

japan know this

[@markshasteen4579]

You mean they volunteered to be an example of why you don't touch our boats​@@malesaelisheva5417

[@owenthompson4071]

So the only question is was she rechristened Enterprise or Constitution

[@goldengryphon]

Enterprise is a research vessel. Constitution is the new, renamed trader. The first American designed ship in the new class is Enterprise.

[@Ryvaken]

Neither. Absent a very specific set of political maneuvers there's no way the name Enterprise isn't in service as a carrier when the first space warship comes online. And, Star Trek fans notwithstanding, the name Enterprise should always belong to a carrier in honor of CV-6. I will never forgive the men that sent her to the breakers before I was even born. That was a tragic waste. As for Constitution, she's not being decommissioned by anything short of radioactive mutant napalm termites that are also on fire.

[@goldengryphon]

@@Ryvaken Wait. The Big E? The nuclear carrier? She's been decommed? Damn. I figured that, by the time we actually made it into space, there would probably be giant, glowing, radioactive metal-eating, mutant termites somewhere on the planet.

[@Norbrookc]

Soon to be followed by the Space Battleship Iowa class...

[@ironwolfF1]

Since the America described appears tp be 'Post-Great Awakening'...I'd guess it's the USSS Columbia.

[@shadowskill111]

Still brings a tear to my eye when I was at the US Embassy in Iraq during the last war there and the state department had a Team America World Police movie poster on its door.

[@718EngrCo]

Brother I can’t tell you how much I appreciate that you read the stories yourself instead of using an automated system.

[@joshuacross3599]

I like that the second story subverts expectations. I thought it was going to be the typical "america bad" stuff but it turned into the best of what America is.

[@derekbroestler7687]

@joshuacross3599 As an American, we are both the worst and best of humanity.

[@billyclyde5129]

A fairly accurate description of what the future will probably look like. A pleasant thought.

[@Twokeeshonds]

I have been binge watching all of your narrations for the last couple of weeks. AG, you are an exceptional narrator, sir. I have enjoyed your energy, voice inflections, and the wonderful writings of your authors. Fantastic job, my friend. Simply fantastic!

[@AgroSquerril]

Glad you are enjoying it

[@kurtismiller9544]

For DA SKWERL and his Nest, may they always prosper

[@proudamerican183]

625th like, for AMERICA 🇺🇸

[@caderiddle5996]

God Bless America 🇺🇸

[@deussalt4479]

'merica! For the Agro-rythm!

[@SirWhiteRabbit-gr5so]

That most feared of navies, the Cajun Navy.

[@Uzzgub]

A Interaction for the Interaction God, a Comment for the Comment Throne, for the Almighty Algorithm

[@markthurst9751]

FOR THE ALGORITHM!!!!

[@RedRipperDragon]

I kinda like the idea that our weapons tech is already on par if not a step behind, or in some cases a step above. Many stories either have us under gunned or over gunned.

[@lawrencespruyt5053]

"They can't have anything to compare to our muskets!"

[@ThePamastymui]

Do you have any ideas? 😉

[@steelsquire2153]

Aliens: “I touched the boat” America: American national anthem playing in the distance intensely with murderous intent. “MURICA!!!”

[@loganshaw4527]

Next song "for the red white blue"

[@mackenziedrake]

I love a good story about the power of diversity. It gives me hope. The second one made me laugh. Many thanks.

[@Ryvaken]

The problem with "diversity" is the other end of the bell curve. "Diversity" tends to lead to employment quotas and the like which damage the integrity of the whole by trying to force "diversity" to manifest as an end unto itself.

[@mackenziedrake]

@@Ryvaken The overall effect is still to increase the available minds and bodies that can be brought to bear on a problem.

[@SpiritWolf1966]

I enjoy all of Agro Squirrel Narrates videos

[@voltprime209]

United States of America has evolved it is now the United planets of America

[@caderiddle5996]

Manifest Destiny, phase two has begun. Let none stand in our way!

[@shadowskill111]

The fun part is guessing which planets outlaw abortion and books at any one time.

[@loganshaw4527]

​@@shadowskill111 Lol when the south raises again it is in space. The south: now how did that happen? Reading reports of it being the south on human territories. The south: o that was not how I thought it would happen.

[@gorasul12]

"The government was accountable" 😆😂🤣

[@cybercifrado]

America: "These are our boats now. DONT. TOUCH. OUR. BOATS."

[@vergilsparda80]

The beauty of a war time economy

[@samcodeforsam7315]

Good job AgroSquirrel

[@archersfriend5900]

Inside every alien is an American waiting to come out.

[@Shadow.Dragon]

Great stories; Excellent narration! Got a LOL listening to both stories!!!

[@johns9652]

The first story surprised me a bit, thought it was going to be about Humans having scabbards or something, but no, it was about Bell Curves. Sorta.

[@danarose2677]

High hopes from the thumbnail alone 😂

[@conradshtock3039]

2nd story: *FREEDOM DELIVERY!!!!!*

[@xunheilvsnipezx3324]

Howdy howdy from Tucson

[@donaldscholand4617]

People stay where they are content. The discontent move west. When there's no more land to move into, they start looking up.

[@yomogami4561]

thanks for the stories and narration

[@tootiredtostop1606]

He's a real man. Real men don't learn lessons, because they're never wrong. It's so inspiring watching him steadfastly refuse to learn from his own experiences. Even if it takes him the rest of his life in custody, he should stand firm. One question: if the food he's receiving is for Mr. Pollard, but he isnt Mr. Pollard, isn't he stealing? The jail staff should look into that. Mr. Pollard must be hungry, having missed so many meals.

[@victortahlor4038]

Thank you for the reading

[@Ryu_D]

Thank you for the video.

[@KwaterbugBUTCHER]

For the Algorithm ,For the Author(s), For the Disembodied voice!

[@bluefalconssuck5881]

If they touch our boats, they'll get a "proportional' measure of FAFO education, as well as an immediate registration in our Unhealthcare Programs.

[@caderiddle5996]

I’m actually quite glad for that second story. It actually made me feel a bit of pride, and I just so happened to be driving past the court house which had the flags out for Memorial Day. In these times it’s hard to feel a lot of pride for this once great nation. May God restore us soon.

[@feldamar2]

Funnily enough. USA only does about 3-5% of GDP to military(Depending on exact year. Wiki shows 3.4% for 2023). Which, historically speaking, is par the course or even a touch low. It's actually abnormal how LITTLE that (Most) of the rest of the world puts into their military compared to historical norms. The USA just has such a large economy that 3.4% of it is still a large amount. That, and lots of media attention. As context, Up to 44% was used during Total Warfare in WW2 and height of the Cold War was 14% So really. 3.4% is almost nothing.

[@NobodyDungeons]

I fully expect humanity to enter the galaxy as 12ft tall absolute units with indestructible skin.

[@MrGunBunny13]

Unleash the Foridians!

[@michaellewis3226]

So long as the galactic community doesn't mess with US ships, they may be alright.

[@nco_gets_it]

25% of the DISCRETIONARY budget...which is only one third of the total budget. So 25% of 33%. It is important to understand how little of the US total budget actually goes into defense for the military that buys...in fact, welfare payments are double the military budget.

[@warrathblacktiger5566]

LMAO the title of this is exactly same as the name of our guild in ARK OF WAR I had stop and look thought one of our KZbinrs did a review and didn't bother to tell me as I'm the boss of the guild lol

[@Daehawk]

His way of reading makes me playing this at X2 speed like I do all these slow ass videos hard to understand

[@genericuser984]

oh boy

[@t.p.3456]

For the algorithm 👽👾🤖🌌🛰🚀🛸🌠

[@loganshaw4527]

This is a line between genius and insane. Sometimes the rewriting of how the brain functions acts as a intelligence upgrade of the software for the hardware of the brain. How they see the world is different from the start so they are already thinking outside of the box and they are just going farther away from the box over time. Like a mutation in evolution.

[@zimattack9994]

Yes the final boss of planet earth America

[@nordknotwork]

Ship shows up over Glactic council HQ. "Heard yall might have some SPACE OIL in need of some democracy over here"

[@Jeff55369]

lol.. when i saw the title, i thought the two story titles were one

[@pheonixblue01]

Even just hearing the second title made me cackle.

[@cheesetonk]

if you so smart, then why we were the first to make it and use it? - story no. 1 in simple terms

[@Crowbars357]

*”America, Feck Yeah!” intensifies*

[@rosebloodwater13]

I automatically laughed reading the title 🤣

[@pieceofschmidtgamer]

AMERICA, FUCK YEAH! DON'T MESS WITH TEXAS!

[@shadowskill111]

Yeah! Let their power grid continue to fail every year!

[@pieceofschmidtgamer]

@@shadowskill111 Because they've been trying to implement wind and solar...

[@civosborne]

I saw the title card and got a chubb.

[@erushi5503]

Story 1: Other Xeno: OOHH Humanity made space railroad, nice, lets trade Traxic: *Random former classroom genuis noises Story 2: "DONT TOUCH MY BOATS!" "I'LL BRING OUT THE CHECKLIST!"

[@el3g3le]

🇺🇸

[@AgroSquerril]

Thank you for the dono , it is very much appreciated

[@earmunchermuncher7639]

Lollllll name confused me

[@loganshaw4527]

​@@earmunchermuncher7639 the name eagle was taken already.

[@earmunchermuncher7639]

@@loganshaw4527 I figured as much lul. I'm earmuncher1 because younger me used earmuncher and lost the password lol

[@drunkendevil6960]

I haven't watched the video as of this comment. But reading the title, it got me thinking. What would aliens think of the customs of each country on earth?

[@sbritton1313]

*starts singing* "I'm proud to be an American, were at least I know I'm free"

[@KroMagnum4]

Merica "F" yeah!

[@whirlwwind]

🎉

[@Dragoon_Duma]

🐿

[@COCCOMOJOE]

They should of know that as long as there is not oil The Americans will just send them money.

[@666stonewall]

Don't mess with a Yank's boat!

[@RealArcalian]

Greetings, Mentlegent! For the Rhyhtm that is Algo Story 1: Clearly these aliens never heard of bell curves, or black swans. Story 2: Defnitely HFY, and funny to this American. But where this story fails is in saying aliens have no military because it "isn't worth it". Uh, no. Any species thinking that way wouldn't survive.

[@MidnightSmoke]

yep, leave it to the good ole USA to muck the rest of the rest of the galaxy. Here is a like and comment for the story, for entertaining me, to help your channel grow, to appease the great and powerful KZbin algorithm demon, and get you the recognition you deserve.

[@tylerboone6584]

This story is called "Don't tread on me". That's like a big finger in Galaxy's face that says "Kiss my American ass." - General Theodore Nugent, Cmdr: Damn Yankees Legion

[@seanbolster7603]

Murica.

[@merlinwizard1000]

4th, 22 May 2024

[@roberthodson8645]

💪😁👍

[@iaaf_nw2367]

🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

[@davidhenderson3400]

"They have edge cases" What does that mean?

[@zhivkodanev3695]

Why there isn't any new series like second part of " The New Spices "?

[@AgroSquerril]

I am still recovering from voice surgery , its taking longer than expected

[@loganshaw4527]

​@@AgroSquerril I hope you are feeling better. I heard about why it is taking so long to recover those infections are no joke and are difficult to recover from if they get to severe. Even now having said issues my self. Make sure you are hydrated and taking water or soothing drink breaks while you recover or do any light voice work.

[@bohicagaming4462]

Humanity - Extinct Cause : obsession with plastic effected reproduction

[@AmbroseBoaBowie]

🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🏴‍☠️

[@Marrok48]

USA USA USA 🇺🇸

[@yrm1594]

I have a strange feeling the second story was written by an American

[@Darkwintre]

In a few months this might change…

[@ericwahl733]

USA! USA! USA!

[@riverraven7359]

America thinking it can take on the universe. If it wasn't for the fact we live in the same atmosphere id almost like to watch them try....

[@loganshaw4527]

Lol watch out if Canada joins America out there.

[@TheRealInscrutable]

200K

[@SiegeTF]

Space God help those xenos if one of those serf races happen to resemble otters!

[@tabithachastain6999]

As a USian...no.

[@goldengryphon]

I'd love to see the sub-sub-sub genre of 'MFY. I think it'd be a fun road map of where to go from here.

[@rodrigorubio8918]

They forgot texas

[@Wastelandman7000]

There are always Americans. LOL

[@mikemcmahon3118]

dragonsoup coldwarboomaboofin seven cerberus casper arnholt lord azracul

[@oldbutnotdead1]

snik snik snik

[@Darksoulpoetry]

[@iron_side5674]

Man, you can totally tell this was written by an american, can´t you. "Highest living Standards"

[@Subliminalsapper]

"Highest living standards in the known galaxy. Only behind their allies. Who's combined military forces could take on the combined armies in the galaxy." Did you miss that part?

[@JRRodriguez-nu7po]

These stories are related. Because America values individuals above community, genius flocks here. Between 1st to 4th grade in Cuba I had to pretend to be stupid so the Government would not take me to a boarding school by force. Socialism punishes the excellent. The furl of communism, the end goal of socialism, is envy. I actually am a genius, on the lower end. Trust me, there's a price to pay. Think if a basic Toyota vs a Ferrari. Sure the Toyota is slower, but it is FAR more reliable. That's why at 21 I asked my parents to find me a young wife who (18) who had zero career or intellectual interests. She and God keep me grounded. Unlike my uncle who required ⚡ to his brain, I stayed with my feet on the ground. 110 is roughly peak IQ for success and happiness. Also, while average IQ is roughly equal, there's FAR more dumb and genius men than women.

[@scoterf]

lol, wtf is this?

[@laststand6420]

Very true, communism is a nice bit of wrapping paper around a core of envy. Also, I believe you are correct about intelligence not being all it is cracked up to be. It's quite lonely when nobody else understands the concepts you are interested in talking about.

[@JesusRodriguez-zy3wj]

@@laststand6420 Fortunately I am a man. My wife of 40 years may not understand me but she admires that. For those few women in the genius range it is far more difficult because of female mammalian hypergamy (excluding the spotted hyena and the naked mole rat).