CATS is a Disturbing Nightmare and I hate it

[@orvilleredenpiller338]

“95 million dollars” I recently saw a meme that said “Opera is made by rich people for rich people, theatre is made by poor people for rich people, movies are made by rich people for poor people and memes are made by poor people for poor people.” I honestly think the moment the greenlit this for 95 million was the moment it was doomed.

[@ppsarrakis]

95 isnt that much for todays standards...

[@julianburr2750]

Nastassia Musicals are theatre productions.

[@michaelatanasio223]

Good quote.

[@michaelatanasio223]

@Nastassia musicals are for the insane. Case in point...

[@shawncolarusso5516]

Who is the modern day Aristotle who graced my ears with this quote?

[@CervantesVI]

You didn't even mention the worst part, where Rebel Wilson sings a song about how she trains and raises rats and cockroaches to perform for her before she eats them, then proceeds to eat several cockroaches with very terrified human faces, all the while very upbeat, jazzy music is playing and all the other cats are staring in amazement.

[@AmandaTheJedi]

I literally had an entire section of my notes dedicated to the cockroaches and mice and my brain decided to save me from acknowledging it again

[@CervantesVI]

@@AmandaTheJedi That's reasonable.

[@ericjames6501]

This is the part deterring me from seeing it out of morbid curiosity.

[@alexismaynor9528]

CervantesVI In the original musical it’s weird, but it’s literally the cats but they’ve got the cockroach costumes on top of the cat costumes. The musical is...weird. But I’m not sure about the movie.

[@manbearpig7521]

Brilliant!

[@rachaelmatthews4196]

CATS was just a foreshadowing for how 2020 was going to be... Weird, uncomfortable, terrible and everyone just wants their time back

[@sleepysartorialist]

I am looking for the lie. I can't find it. Yikes

[@danielsweet858]

🤣 but true 🎃

[@txaggievet]

Pet Semetary: I’m the scariest cat movie of the year Cats: Hold my beer

[@mekastayfabsteele5989]

True

[@dandy-dani]

Pet semetary was boring

[@cybertek3188]

@@dandy-dani The original was more interesting than the remake.

[@ericthered2963]

@@cybertek3188 The book is always better.

[@Ektalon]

Keith French Cats: “Hold my beer. Wait, you can’t! Because you don’t have human hands like we do! Ahaha haha haha!”

[@user-ew2sd7vl5m]

The actors look like they’ve been put through a full body snapchat filter

[@noemistephanie93]

True lol

[@KoriMasho]

You mean...they weren't?

[@SaraBethCox]

Does that what catra looks like from she ra?

[@sleepysartorialist]

Faaaaacts

[@Langley_Ackerman19]

😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@YourPrivateNightmare]

0/10, Jason Derulo didn't even yell out his own name everytime he came on screen, how am I supposed to immerse myself?

[@bookofdust]

So it is porn?

[@DriscolDevil]

Who? I have no idea who you are talking about because he never shouted his own name.

[@blackphillip8486]

Omg he's in this shit show too?

[@TheMouseAvenger]

LOL! XD

[@Xehanort10]

@@DriscolDevil He says his name at the beginning of every song he sings.

[@sharkpansoup]

Guys the first rule of horror is that you don’t show too much of the monsters, not base an entire movie around them

[@galacticwarlock2271]

Golf clap...

[@Hellswarmglow]

Rob Zombie says you should also have a disgusting backstory about the monster. Honestly, I would see a Rob Zombie Cats movie.

[@analicious94]

Hellswarmglow holy shit someone call him right fucking now, we’re doing this

[@Xehanort10]

@@Hellswarmglow If you've seen one Rob Zombie movie you've seen them all. Every male actor in his films is long haired and bearded, every character has the cliche "abused as a kid and bullied at school" backstory, Zombie thinks making every other character around the killers an evil prick will make the killer or killers the lesser of 2 evils but actually makes it so you can't sympathise with or root for anybody. There's rape scenes for the sake of having them and they have nothing to do with the plot. And even though his wife can't act he keeps putting her in his films out of nepotism.

[@EmillyOrr]

And remember: they went to CAT SCHOOL for this film. CAT. SCHOOL. They were INSTRUCTED to act in these ways. OFFICIALLY.

[@EmillyOrr]

@Charles Bronson Hand to God. There are articles on the special training. And I think one of Corden's interviews goes into it.

[@rickrollrizal2364]

I feel like... The cat school was made and run by cat furry fetishists... No wonder it's awkward.

[@rhys7877]

To be fair - the stage production of Cats is much different. The dancing and movements are meant to look good on stage, not in a realistic setting. Plus I think the "cat school" was sort of a thing that the studio did, not associated with the actual broadway production.

[@ericthered2963]

You gotta be making this up. That's where all of their money went?

[@TheGoofy1932]

@Emily Orr A cat school run by cats, perhaps? Watching as the stupid humans did "cat tricks " for them, maybe? Cats are sociopaths. 😂

[@angelspiritfoxx]

CATS should have been a 2d animated movie, like it was originally planned. The designs looked so much better. Plus, I believe the 2d version also had a different script.

[@sana143bana]

Ooh where can I see the concepts for that idea?

[@darianstarfrog]

@@sana143bana totally! Hell yea! :p

[@kinagrill]

with anthropomorphic-esque cats... not these uncanny valley 'fevernightmare' creatures they decided to go with XI

[@cayreet5992]

I mean, the "Felidae" movie has a musical number of a sort and it works. That could have worked for Cats, too. Plus, they wouldn't have had to worry about the actors moving like cats and suchlike. Animation can make cats do anything...

[@danielminutilli5372]

I thot the theatre cleaning people might find me dead in my chair by the time the movie ended. I need a shirt that says "I survived CATS"

[@bigmike9128]

Thought ??

[@elisabethenglisch3835]

Please add "The Movie". The Musical deserves better

[@joeannchaney1219]

I got all the way up to the Macavity intro. It was so terrible.

[@SleepySloth2705]

They should have either.... A: just used makeup like the Broadway show Or B: made the movie fully animated and cartoony

[@quisea]

3rd choice: Don't make it!

[@ToddHowardWithAGun]

All they had to do was give Taylor Swift a pair of cat ears and a tail and nothing else. Instant hit.

[@EmilyGloeggler7984]

Agreed.

[@saltshaker2861]

Emilio Hidalgo i’m very disappointed cats wasn’t fully animated because just thinking about how decent it would look is depressing

[@KittyKatt_Luna80s]

If it had been a fully animated feature with the actors chosen doing voices, it may have worked. They could have still had Victoria the White Kitten doing her ballet - watch The Cat Returns (a.k.a. The Cat's Repayment) by Studio Ghibli - THAT is how you animate cats acting and dancing like humans! Victoria would be the spit of Yuki (the soon to be Cat Princess) from that film!

[@MojiBeau]

This is the closest thing to a legitimate cinematic existential crisis I’ve ever seen.

[@ilznidiotic]

Check out Black Nerd Comedy's review. It broke him so bad, he ended up giving it his highest recommendation.

[@MojiBeau]

Ilznidiotic I saw that lol. I’ve been watching everyone’s CATS reviews and I swear this film is turning everyone into a poet. It’s the only way they can express the horror 😂

[@peterfrank3365]

"Existential crisis" is also how Folding Ideas described it.

[@dumpygoodness4086]

CATS was one of the MOST REFRESHING FILMS EVER. No one could PREDICT how the film would unfold (which you can't say about most films, which all have the same copycat script and cliches). It was WEIRD and FUN. (It does wear thin half way thru.)

[@kiwiangeldust6912]

@@dumpygoodness4086 this movie was stinkier than 2 septic tanks colliding and erupting into a volcano of 💩

[@mtoffo2275]

y'all say "movie idea gone wrong", I say "money laundering scheme gone right"

[@LibraGamesUnlimited]

I hadn't thought of that but apparently, Euw Ball has been doing that his whole career.

[@jessicabuntz8668]

CORNY ANALOGY, VERY CORNY. BUT CATS WAS AN AMAZING MOVIE. AND EVERYBODY KNOWS IT.

[@EtherDais]

Like Adam Sandler and that twin movie

[@LibraGamesUnlimited]

@@EtherDais I suspect he did that just to line his own pockets. Wouldn't be surprised he got paid double for playing two parts. Oh, and why weren't feminists pissed off that he took a role from a female actor?

[@EtherDais]

@@LibraGamesUnlimited Agreed, I credit Red letter media with this idea, for the record

[@DiscClub6]

I feel bad for the actors who put their trust in this project. But also... cats? You.. you thought cats was the way to go?

[@ericthered2963]

Because of money. They thought: "Hey, this is one of the highest selling musicals. Let's make a movie out of it, to make even more money!"

[@kjs.gab.]

True I mean the musical DOESNT HAVE A STORY LINE what were you thinking???

[@TheaTheGenius]

@@ericthered2963 plus, it was directed by Tom Hooper. So it was money +the potential of another oscar (I think they even planned to petition the academy for the best effects category 🤣🤣🤣)

[@TF2Fan101]

The Mandalorian: This is not the way.

[@SymphoniaFly]

@@kjs.gab. Ummmm, many musicals have story lines, dud.

[@jaelebaldassini8876]

"Cats" was the last movie i saw at cinema before lockdown. I'm still crying

[@darianstarfrog]

Lol..that sucks! :| there's nothing I can say to make it suck less.. not until you make that new memory for on top this one.. tick tock.. .

[@Lach141]

The stage production of Cats is currently touring so I had the privilege of seeing it when it came through my city. While it wasn’t exactly my favorite musical, it was an enjoyable and memorable experience that had me and my friends leaving the theater happier than I had anticipated. I haven’t seen the movie (and I don’t know if I will...) but while I enjoyed the stage play it’s no surprise to me that the film would be nothing more than a monstrosity. Cats is really an experience. Between the set, the costumes, the choreo, the actors, etc. the show will blow you away if you see it live. It’s clear to the audience that the musical is more about spectacle and showmanship than it is about a narrative, because the narrative is virtually nonexistent. But the problem is the movie has none of that. The “sets” and “costumes” are all computers, most the actors have little to no experience in musical theatre or even acting at all. And the sense of wonder that comes from seeing the show live is nonexistent because we know movies can do just about anything now. So the audience is left with nothing to cling to other than the story, and while it seems the movie tried to make the story stronger, it ultimately fails because Cats, at its core, is not centered on it’s narrative. I wrote all this so that people would know that Cats, while not for everyone, is not an inherently “bad” musical. It works very well for a lot of people as a stage play. There’s a reason it holds it’s place as a classic not only in Andrew Lloyd Webber’s repertoire, or even the world of musical theatre. but also in pop culture as a whole. So for anyone who took the time to read this thank you for your time and please don’t needlessly shit on Cats altogether just because the movie is a nightmare (unless of course you’ve seen it live and still hated it. You are allowed to fork your own opinion). Just shit on the movie.

[@juno_likes_stars3085]

I've seen Cats on Broadway and I loved it. I don't usually like things without a plot but the performers were amazing; they were so fascinating to watch and lose myself in the music.

[@juno_likes_stars3085]

@Sabrina Owens It kind of has a plot if you think about it the right way. It could be interpreted as a handful of eligible cats competing to be reincarnated with the small subplot of Old Duteronemy disappearing and the Magical Mr. Mistoffullies (I probably didn't spell that right) bringing him back. That's the way I thought of it when I saw it but the original source material, some random poems about different kinds of cats, didn't have a plot. Cats has a plot kind of like America's got Talent has a plot, existent if you really want it to but not terribly obvious to the casual viewer. So, yes, Cats can have a plot if you interpret it that way but most people think it's plot-less. I hope that makes sense :)

[@Crisjola]

I've seen the recorded/"""movie""" version of the Broadway play, and loved it, along with the sound track and read (repeatedly) "Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats" to the point where I've had to fix my paperback. So I love "Cats" the play. I've refused to watch this dumpster fire of a movie. And while I 100% recognize that there is a difference from watching dumpster fire shows (mostly trash/hastily thrown together anime tbh) is movie is more of a time sink I feel than any of those shows could ever be. I absolutely refuse to expose anyone to this movie (including myself and I'm usually all down for a hate watch) and will sit people down with the original recorded stage play and OST. None of this BS. Cats deserved better as a conceptual play and not a narrative driven one. :/

[@markromine5103]

"If I suffer, you suffer!" should be the title of this movie. Just a thought.

[@brandoncolon3047]

Her descriptions and feels are so accurate she should be getting paid for her reviews

[@ElijahSinclair1220]

@@brandoncolon3047 her feels? Wtf

[@williamsapong81]

The weird thing is, I feel that this could work if A. The movie was fully animated B. The cats were actual cats instead of people in cat suits C. The sexual tension was toned down 110%

[@thereseo6008]

gmu_alum08 but it was that way in the stage play too. It’s just a weird musical.

[@ifeeldead463]

A. What they should've gone with B. Nah, would never work. Actual cats would never listen lol C. I guess??? Though, I heard the OG play was horny to begin with :/

[@ambrosiadreamer]

Therese O'Brien But for a PG movie it should’ve been turned down 110%. If they had put it at PG-13 or older, leaving it in would’ve been more.... justified? I guess?

[@gatsbyvalentine]

I wonder if animation would’ve worked? Like Aristocats

[@filipatanasovski584]

D. Not making the movie

[@cherryb0mb86]

I’ve watched the 1998 cats a lot, and went to go and see the musical in 2013 I was so disappointed with this movie. The characters were terrible and the casting was too, bustopher Jones (the cat played by James) was made a mockery of, in the musical he’s a respectable cat that everyone adores or looks up to whereas in the movie they just thought “ah yes he’s fat we needed comic relief” the same with jennyanydots (rebel wilson) her cat is also respectable in the musical as she is an adult cat but in the movie all she made was unnecessary jokes. The scene with the cockroaches and mice was disturbing and should never have existed. Bombalurina and rumple teaser were made as the bad guys, rumpleteazer was one of the kittens and was just a mischievous cat and was not working for Macavity, bombalurina was also not a bad guy sure she sang his song but she was basically a protector of the tribe. Grizabella was way too young and was a terrible choice to have Jennifer cast as her, you couldn’t decifer the characters from each other and they all looked the same, Mistoffelees was seen as just clumsy and weak in the movie which was terrible. The relationship between Victoria and Mistoffelees was weird, the rum tum tugger was terrible and wasn’t as good as the musical. And there was just too much dialogue. That’s a lot to read sorry, the only plus was munkustrap.

[@rotisseriepossum]

god imagine if they included that superhero cat. I haven’t seen the ‘98 version in years but I remember he creeped me out for some reason

[@ashleyallensworth5646]

They'd have to change the lines in the Rumpus Cat song because that one's racist, so it's understandable they didn't include it.

[@jennaheiser625]

I was devastated when I learned that they changed the actual roles of a lot of the cats. Bombularina was a big one, because the musical has her supporting a lot of other cats during songs (especially Demeter) and basically being the younger, sexy, still protective aunt of the kittens. And don’t talk to me about Jemima, because THEY CUT HER OUT.

[@Skrill99]

And Skimbleshanks! (well in my opinion he and his song were a plus) Also Jennifer Hudson (39) was older in the 2019 movie than elaine paige (33) was when she was originally casted as Grizabella in 1981(well as an understudy but yeah) So in my opinion it wasn't the age of the actor that was the problem, maybe if the designs were improved that would help immensely

[@TheBonsaiZone]

I dread seeing the preview, I can't imagine watching the whole movie, you are brave!

[@Undefinedde]

Yeah

[@robk.6591]

Cats (2019) seems like one of the movies that Alex from A Clockwork Orange would be forced to watch as part of his behavior modification therapy. 😟

[@ahardworker2154]

Ha

[@Qwertzalcoatl]

LOL Best comment! I hope you beat Seth Everman's one day!

[@rahul327]

Not even the Ludovico Technique is this traumatic

[@pixiniarts]

I think it would be counter productive to behavior modification... Unless you wanted a patient who wakes up screaming and can't stop crying and projectile vomiting.

[@IPA300]

Disagree. This movie would make him MORE homicidal.

[@MrStevenWolfe]

I grew up with the original musical, and it wasn't that bad. But tomorrow, for a family members birthday, we're going to the theater to see it... Pray for me, for I go into the abyss with my eyes wide...

[@oldoutlet6946]

You can make a game out of it. When watching the movie, eat only one piece of popcorn everytime you felt a scene made you uncomfortable. Though you'll probably be done the bag on the 40 minute mark.

[@unouni2548]

I'd like an update from someone who saw the musical and thought it was ok. If you don't mind, that is. 😊

[@MrStevenWolfe]

@@unouni2548 I'll absolutely make the time for it!

[@TheRexTera]

If the ticket is a birthday gift or a Christmas present this would be the last time you will ever get invited to that person again. She\he will just be too embarrassed...

[@MrStevenWolfe]

@@TheRexTera It's from my mother, for my Dad's birthday. Had to postpone, but if it's shit, we can always just rewatch the original!

[@owainratcliffe5908]

"I am almost certain Jason Derulo is having sex with 2 cats in a GARBAGE CAN at one point!" if there was ever a quote to get as a tattoo..

[@moratalks6122]

Yeah....i was pretty sure that's what they were implying and I was like...why??

[@colleen4ever]

THE HELL?!?! The musical itself is FAMILY FRIENDLY!!

[@amiedaniel1591]

I wish i could like this more than once 😆😊

[@brycerichardson3687]

@@colleen4ever in the original the cats are implied to be in heat. Not to mention the girls staring at the Rum tum tuggers midsection and I doubt you watched the original.

[@TheMrSarcastic]

Maybe that’s why he was so disappointed with size of his penis in cats.

[@QuikVidGuy]

"THEY SPENT ENOUGH MONEY. TO FUND A QUARTER OF A SPACE SHUTTLE. AND THEY COULDN'T GET THEIR DANCERS TO DANCE TO A BEAT."

[@jennaheiser625]

Well hello, fellow Sideways subscriber! 😆

[@Skrill99]

SIDEWAYS GANG!!!

[@lizabethhampton4537]

@@Skrill99 SIDEWAYS GANG!!!

[@HappiiWheels]

"They were all plenty horned up before catnip started falling from Taylor Swift." Lmaoooo

[@ronstoppable5659]

Can’t wait for this movie’s ironic midnight screenings 10 years from now

[@AmandaTheJedi]

it would have to be interesting to justify that

[@mynameisnotcory]

On halloween*

[@orvilleredenpiller338]

Just around the time God decides to flood the world again for our degeneracy.

[@transamination]

Ironic midnight HALLOWEEN screening would be most appropriate I think.

[@kitirena_koneko]

Totally not happening. Rocky Horror Picture Show is fun and silly, Plan 9 from Outer Space and Attack of the Killer Tomatoes were both so awful as to be fun, but this is just horrible and deserves to be buried in a litterbox somewhere, and I'm a fan of the Broadway musical saying this.

[@megamegaO]

Be an actor Be an actor who got a role for quick cash Be an actor who's not worried about anything in the movie, but his own bulge. Be Jason Derulo

[@shadowwolf6205]

I read this in the way how he sings it in his songs

[@randomaster101]

Cats 2019 is the type of film you would need to watch drunk with a bunch of friends. Never watch this film alone or sober.

[@alexander5207]

Never watch this film. Fixed that for you.

[@vintagearisen]

I actually watched it alone and sober in a filthy movie theater at five o'clock on a Thursday night and that was perfect because I laughed my ass off between prolonged screeches of "WHAT THE FUCK"

[@Dragondude16]

Or take some shrooms

[@flegmon618]

I’m sorry, I will do just that.

[@caitlinbrewer4843]

I watched it high with a friend at a local $3 theater. We made it 45 minutes.

[@TheCityCatYT]

The Cats movie is the end of culture. Culture’s over everybody. We lost.

[@sleepysartorialist]

*American culture; thus my obsessive focus on my own actual very rich ethnic cultures

[@ashlabelle]

I just went to the movie's IMDb and the top review right now says "This is what the people in Birdbox saw".

[@ronstoppable5659]

Can someone please explain to me why The first Matrix is rated R but this is PG?

[@1997residente]

dead security guards and a lot of cursing va horrifying humanoid cats

[@ronstoppable5659]

@1997residente There are PG 13 movies that have a lot more cursing and violence though and there isn’t a single F bomb in it

[@ckline5486]

Because cat erotica isn't "real" erotica...maybe.🐱

[@MagicAggros]

Because Keanu is dangerously sexy.

[@MeetMeatMo]

Charles Kline CATROTICA

[@raymond-reviews]

I’ve had nightmares that made more sense than this shit.

[@mikevaughnchannel]

God, this woman is funny! 🤗

[@colleen4ever]

STATLER: Well, how did you like the film? WALDORF: I've seen detergents that leave a better film than this! BOTH: Doh-ho-ho-ho!!

[@theoz-zone7470]

Most comical comment so far! 😆

[@deviceology9251]

Catshit

[@asheer9114]

Shyamalan's The Last Airbender - "I'm the worst movie adaptation of the last five years" (2019) Cats - 'Hold our catnip" 😹

[@taylorslade8080]

Asheer at least Shyamalan puts his heart into his works, I can’t tell what happened with this film

[@magalimizuki3752]

Erm...Okay Ung (Ang).

[@StarlingofAzerath]

Nahhh Shyamalan did Avatar dirty. That cannot be forgiven

[@Carabas72]

The Last Airbender is a lot older than 5 years.

[@TF2Fan101]

Taylor Slade That can’t be said for Avatar, unfortunately.

[@jtoland2333]

I wish the reviewers who have reviewed the movie, Cats, would take the time to watch either the live play or the 1998 DVD. Its just not fair to judge what used to be a wonderful theater experience against this turd.

[@Miss_Myth]

@Gabriel White While I agree that the quality of the film should absolutely stand and be judged on its own, I would hate for the sentiment to go the other way, where other forms of the media (in this case, the play) are judged or not experienced at all because this left a bad taste in their mouth. If someone saw the (in my mind non-existent) Shyamalan A:TLA movie, and decided based on that to never watch the show, it would be a compete tragedy.

[@minwellitsanicknamebegrate2531]

I loved the 1998 vhs movie version so much as a kid that later I was gifted it as an adult. I saw the trailer for this and decided on the spot I wasn’t going to ruin my memory of it by watching this. I mean even the costumes were better then whatever cgi bullshit they pulled, it’s based on a collection of poems that was then made into a play I know it’s supposed to be open to interpretation but damn did they screw it up , I feel bad for the author of the original play, I have to say the 1998’s movie/ play was the best in my opinion and I still cry actual tears when grisabella sings Jennifer is a great singer but Elaine Paige killed that part.

[@Pooky1991]

If anything it does some favors to the the play, because I remember it being polarizing to some people even back then for coming off horny, being odd with its story structure, and being uncanny valley for some people (though the remake took the nightmare fuel up to 11). If anything this remake made people soften up and/or appreciate what the original screen play was doing because it's no where as bad as this movie.

[@TheCityCatYT]

Cats is not a movie. Cats is a puzzle, it’s like a Rubik’s cube but all the colours got replaced with ants and you have to solve it, that’s the movie.

[@florencedoucet4974]

For a second I thought you were going to reference the Lament Configuration.

[@mirandastewart3544]

@@florencedoucet4974 Hellriser reference.

[@HeartofFlame]

With fire ants. And they keep biting you.

[@oldoutlet6946]

If anyone wants a good movie to counteract this *cat* -astrophic nightmare, I recommend Isle of Dogs by Wes Anderson.

[@LibraGamesUnlimited]

It doesn't have a bunch of actors CGI'ed into dogs does it?

[@oldoutlet6946]

@@LibraGamesUnlimited If by CGI you mean beautiful stop-motion animation with a chilling and heartfelt story, then yes.

[@LibraGamesUnlimited]

@@oldoutlet6946 I don't think that was what I meant but I will go with it. :)

[@thesweetembraceofnonexiste3740]

To be fair the original format of the singing and dancing cats worked far better in its original show form; as a movie, with a typical movie three-act structure and horrible costuming(?), it collapses.

[@tinyblonde]

I really wanna see this movie now after everyone’s said how bad it is.

[@lutube7897]

Me too!!!!!!

[@LibraGamesUnlimited]

I've sat through some real turkeys in my time, like Ed Wood minus the charm kind of crap but I don't know. This might be one step too far. Maybe I am getting too old for this watching bad movies thing.

[@tajcee]

I got 5 AMC gift cards this Christmas and I still wouldn’t use ‘em on this shit.

[@LibraGamesUnlimited]

@gmu_alum08 I think I can live without ever seeing any of this nightmare movie.

[@alejandroojeda1572]

I think i'm going to keep It as a possible torture device

[@certs743]

It is crazy how someone can manage to take one of the most famous pieces of musical theatre and turn it into a dumpster fire.

[@TMMReznor]

I first read "Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats" when I was a kid and having a dull stay at an aunt's house in London. I fell in love with the poems in the book and by extension, the stage show. I knew that this movie was going to be a garish and nauseating insult though.

[@mikigameplays]

all we wanted is ppl in catsuits just like in theatres and we ended up getting nightmare fuel no one asked for

[@uyagraph]

Let's be honest no one wants this movie to exist in the first place.

[@raztipnoirtip]

MikiGameplays there is a filmed version of the 1998 stage show recreated. I think you can buy it on Vudu streaming for $9.99

[@dillonohlemiller9027]

Lonesome Kiddo I wanted a movie version, but not like this

[@colleen4ever]

@@dillonohlemiller9027 Exactly. And one that follows the actual plot and is something you can take the family too. In other words..LIKE THE BROADWAY SHOW!

[@silentmomentum3598]

Do yourselves a favor and spend your money adopting and raising a real cat instead of seeing fake cats from this accident of a movie.

[@trawlins396]

Good idea.

[@CC-fd5qx]

Adopting a real cat is like 90 bucks! Ill just pick up a stray

[@williamgeorgefraser]

@@CC-fd5qx A family of strays adopted me and moved in. Not expensive designer cats, just ordinary little moggies. They are the most beautiful and loving cats one could ever wish to meet.

[@eatsand1440]

one furry on the art team could've prevented this

[@poli_zgaming3616]

I dont think any furries were even on the art team.

[@alexandresobreiramartins9461]

@@poli_zgaming3616 That's what he said.

[@Obiwone1234]

Giving Cats a half a star?? Dang, you're really generous...I would give it the "stab my eyes and ears out" star lol

[@ginger3467]

I would of gave it ZERO stars

[@luuuuux_]

@@ginger3467 that’s generous. I would give it negative infinity

[@acecosmonaut5559]

If Hollywood ever plans to make a remake of Cats, they should just make it animated. Like that Klaus movie from Netflix.

[@certified_mandy]

But klaus is a good movie i just watched it with my grandma last night lol

[@clarinamascarenhas7499]

Don’t know why they didn’t just make it a cartoon

[@p.z.arnott2329]

Interesting enough, back in the early 90s, there was talk about turning it into a cartoon

[@artemisfowldragon]

Because people don’t take traditional animation seriously. Disney’s whole shtick basically put the idea into people’s heads of animation=children

[@TF2Fan101]

alpha reaperion Considering some of Disney’s animated movies can be pretty scary, I wouldn’t say Disney is primarily responsible for that. I’d say it’s more the fault of animation studios who made movies like Ice Age 5, Free Birds, and probably a few others.

[@artemisfowldragon]

TF2Fan101 i think it might be because of the lack of funding given to adult animation in the west, along with studio intervention. The CEOs and boards of the studios want to gentrify people, thus they split it into ‘animation=children’ and ‘live action=adult’. But stuff like Illumination and Blue Sky are also to blame, admittedly. They also started the ‘kids movies get 50000 sequels to sell more toys, we don’t have to try, the little brats will love the bright pictures’. Fucking boomers

[@shadylady2955]

Even the trailer made me cringe. Its like they shoved amazing singer and actors into a movie and hoped people would take it seriously because its them.

[@harshchoudhary9623]

as high as a kite..this was the worst movie of the year but damn was i entertained

[@AmandaTheJedi]

Harsh Choudhary proud of you because could not find an ounce of entertainment

[@MatameVideos]

Sounds like a nice idea. Pot, booze and this shit.

[@tonydv9260]

What a waste of good drugs

[@joaquindonoso5481]

@@AmandaTheJedi It's like The Room but 2019. I'll give this movie credit... in an era were most movies play it safe, they went all out with this one XD.

[@masechababekebeke]

That's how I want to watch this movie, as high as a kite. There's no way I'm watching it sober

[@chrissie627]

I literally cried "oh no not Ian McKellen please no" 😂😭

[@MisterRandom2]

All I have to say is that when the Skeksis from the "Dark Crystal" look LESS scary than your CGI cat characters... you've got a problem.

[@TF2Fan101]

At least the Skeksis were tangible creations, not CGI abominations (Although apparently parts of the Skeksis were CGI).

[@hibikiotonokojishslvocalis7550]

I play DnD, the Skeksis look like a really dramatic bunch of Kenkus in my eyes.

[@MisterRandom2]

​@@hibikiotonokojishslvocalis7550 You should also take a look at the Nagpa. They're A LOT like the Skeksis. Not just in terms of appearance, but also in backstory.

[@hibikiotonokojishslvocalis7550]

@@MisterRandom2 I pull up the Nagpa and I see "level 15 spellcaster" I know what I'm doing for a penultimate boss!

[@DitisEmile]

A lot of the musical theatre production of CATS are ... amazing, but also super intense. And hearing that someone watched a movie based on it and was BORED makes me really worried. I'm probably not going to see it in the cinema, but might give it a look once it's on a streaming service, just so I know what all the fuzz is about.

[@baronblackdragon9078]

Yeah cats actually has really good choreography but yeah. This ain’t it

[@wingedmarauder8011]

It’s like Hamilton but bad and I’m allergic to the characters

[@ladyrest8455]

Hahahaahahah ...ho Lee shiet Ahhahah ahhahah ahhhh hahahaha 😜🤪😶

[@luuuuux_]

Lol

[@masterstuffing]

Cats should be an alternative to serving prison time

[@NJGuy1973]

No, serving prison time should be an alternative to watching Cats.

[@kaiwood7359]

I'll rather go to prison good food TV work out in the yard your not a gang member or nonce it's all gravy

[@leipzigergnom]

I think that would makes felons more dangerous.

[@Pimp-Master]

Epstein was waiting for this film to come out. That's why he didn't commit suicide.

[@kateemma22]

Torture is illegal.

[@draverraj]

"I can assure you, no one needs catnip!" (Laughs so hard, coughs up hairball)

[@leodouskyron5671]

Got to see Andre the Black Nerd’s review. These are two best reviews ever on this disaster!

[@PaulMcElligott]

i haven’t seen this. I thought I had. It turns out I just dropped acid.

[@johngutierrez9277]

Jason Derulo cat isn’t real! He can’t hurt you!

[@mazimadu]

It exist, therefore it's real!

[@bogboyz]

keep telling yourself that.... he waits for you to let down your guard.....

[@HeliRy]

Just be glad they didn’t decide to do this with Starlight Express. If you don’t know, it’s basically Cats.... but everyone is a train. Yup. Trains.

[@elizabethtrudgill9900]

That would end up like Transformers.

[@ppsarrakis]

@@elizabethtrudgill9900 Trainformers i will show myself out..

[@elizabethtrudgill9900]

@@ppsarrakis That's pretty good.

[@madeleine.exists9207]

So it was either horny cats or horny trains😕

[@colleen4ever]

@@madeleine.exists9207 The Cats weren;t horney in the Broadway show.

[@heralddinkldorf2608]

I watched this movie on a plane and I dropped my phone between the seats someone picked up my phone and gave it to me. I’ve never been so embarrassed.

[@scrambled5948]

Nothing good has happened since this movie was made. That can’t be a coincidence.

[@luuuuux_]

It was the beginning of the end

[@TimcastNews]

i want to see it more than ever now

[@fiorefiore9910]

I'm not the #1 fan of the original musical but I like and think that it's enjoyable (even if it's not for everyone). The problem is that this should have just STAYED A THEATRE PRODUCTION. Cats is not fit to be a movie. In the theatre the dance moves and the makeup look amazing, the show really puts emphasis on how good the actors/dancers are. In this movie everything looks confusing and weird, you don't know where the body of the actors ends and the cgi starts. If they wanted to make a movie about Cats with an all star casting they should have just put the cast on a stage like a normal theatre production and filmed it.

[@unouni2548]

I still don't know why they didn't make it an animated film. It would have had the same script issues because it's not really made to be a movie with introduction, conflict and resolution; but at least it wouldn't have been so disturbing as this 'production'... One thing is to have critics say the writing is subpar, but this one is getting universally panned by critics and people who don't know anything about movies alike.

[@nonyabusiness3619]

@@unouni2548 Thank you! I have been saying that CATS should've been animated since the first trailer came out. But people told me that it would be a bad idea because CATS is meant to show off the human body dancing. Making this into an animated film would ruin the dance aspect. Well now the movie is out, and people are complaining about the creepy human/cat bodies.

[@unouni2548]

@@nonyabusiness3619 An animated movie with this exact plot and tone would have still been strange, though probably less cringy... Had it been a comedy (and animated) it would have been SO much better. You can justify almost everything saying it was meant for comedic purposes... They just spent all their money in the cast and a (not so)new technology and thought Broadway fans would jump to their defense for the sake of nostalgia or something of the sort.

[@Princessshamanarta]

I repeat - this musical isn't meant to All the AUDIENCES!

[@attlee2010]

Fiore Fiore it was a rubbish musical too. It’s should have stayed as one good song.

[@ericpode6095]

Cats 2: The Spaying......

[@reverland735]

Eric Pode we. need. this

[@gatorcroc7212]

Between Tommy Wiseau "The Room" and Tom Hoopers "Cats". I'd rather watch "The Room" again.

[@TF2Fan101]

Tommy Wiseau: ‘You are TEARING ME APART, CATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!’

[@MrBiggles53]

What a great story.

[@Xehanort10]

"Ha ha ha. What a story Croc."

[@queer-ios3155]

I would gladly watch The Room every day for the rest of my life until I could quote every single line in the movie and perform it for my school talent show than watch the trailer for this movie again.

[@kora4185]

I love how everyone who watched this is absolutely traumatized for life 🤣🤣🤣

[@IsaacV24]

Worst movie of the decade? Clearly, you haven’t seen The Nutcracker in 3D.

[@DrGregoryHouseIT]

I had ALMOST forgotten that, thanks!

[@IsaacV24]

Skyler Lowe it came out in November 2010 on a limited release.

[@agooddaytorespawn57]

They're on par, easily

[@IsaacV24]

AGoodDayToRespawn Yeah except Cats didn’t come out as neo-nazi propaganda.

[@lorielovesbooks7315]

There can be a tie for worst.

[@campbellsoup93]

So long story short, ignore this movie and go rewatch Cats Don't Dance and the Aristocats.

[@lisah8438]

Or the original Cats

[@NonsenseWithGlasses]

And maybe rescue an actual living cat in the meantime

[@goodwitch87]

God forbid they adapt "Cats Don't Dance" to live action!

[@ghouliegoo]

I love the musical, mainly for the dancing because it has even less of a plot. For some reason the movie has much less impressive dancing, and its ungodly creepy, even compared to the already creepy musical

[@metallica1fan1]

The Island of Dr. Moreau: The Musical

[@sophro9302]

Holy shit

[@nightmarishcompositions4536]

This must be how Guts felt when he was forced to watch the Eclipse.

[@OneToxicPixel]

Honestly, from what little I have seen about the movie, I wouldn't have blamed you if you just sat in front of your camera, holding up your middle finger, giving us the most pissed off look ever for a solid ten minutes for making you watch this garbage monster movie.

[@fourthdrawerdown6297]

My cat hasn’t even seen this movie and he looks pissed.

[@Tidusace07]

I can see this movie gaining a cult following... like Showgirls 😖

[@ericpode6095]

Or Plan 9 from Outer Space! 😸

[@someone5631]

"Jeson Derulo is over party" you predication is amazing.

[@KM-xy4ed]

This is the second video of yours I’ve watched, so far you’re batting a thousand. It’s so enjoying to watch these videos... keep it up!

[@thevigilante5623]

“I was nineteen years old when the musical Cats came to our town. I couldn't wait to see it. After the show I was asked if I wanted to go meet some of the performers backstage. Man, I was thrilled. But when I got back there, they were drunk and out of control. Rumpus Cat and Macavity kept feeling up my leg. I tried to leave, but, Rumpleteazer held me down, and... I was raped by Mr. Mistoffelees.”-Chris, Team America: World Police

[@melobski4]

What

[@haileyturner3309]

What did I just read?

[@ingeborgsvensson4896]

We were so glad we got rid of James Corden when he went to Hollywood. He is now your problem, we don't want him back.

[@johnnyskinwalker4095]

your talk show hosts seem to be all annoying, just like ours

[@mbut123]

James Corden: Britain's loss is also America's loss.

[@mbut123]

I actually liked him in "cruise of the gods". His later work I've not been exposed to...except the excruciating singing in the car stuff.

[@fromthehaven94]

Just curious, did he ever piss people off in a way that isn't related to his onscreen work? Legal troubles? Being a narcissist? I don't get the grief this guy gets- on either side of the Atlantic.

[@TF2Fan101]

Christopher C I don’t get it either. From what I’ve seen of him, he seems like a pretty chill guy. Certainly better than Steven Colbert.

[@anthonysmurthwaite6258]

I genuinely don't know how it was made, did nobody in the huge star-studded cast question what they were doing

[@generalblade7504]

Was everyone drugged and woke up to a legally binding contract?

[@zacharyhawley1693]

The deal with the devil came due. Just saying it clicks like damn.

[@LibraGamesUnlimited]

Seriously, I think actors have stopped asking questions. Seriously, after stories about Sean Connery turning down "Matrix" and "Lord of RIngs" because he didn't understand them or various actors saying they didn't know what the hell to make of movies they starred in and which were successful I think a lot of them just go with it and hope for the best. I guess a lot of them don't want to pass on movies and feel foolish later only now they didn't and probably still feel foolish.

[@Picnicl]

Particularly when Les Miserables won several awards despite some mediocre singing, Chris. Cats' sets will have looked like Chicago meets Moulin Rouge too, both movies that a lot of people like. Cats needed some really great singing and acrobatic/dancing performances and they're just not there enough.

[@LibraGamesUnlimited]

@@Picnicl Yeah, I just think actors have no idea what makes a movie anymore (not that I think anyone else in Hollywood does either) so they pretty much take anything they get offered. That said some don't seem to care and will still turn down something if they don't get it or whatever (typically the ones who have been around the block and have established themselves). I can only image Dame Judy Dench thought since the show was successful the movie would be too even if she didn't understand what she was doing at the time. I have actually heard actors say they had no clue what they were doing, at the time, but it came out fine. I know some of the "Lord of the Rings" actors later said they had no clue what was going on in most of their scenes, they just trusted the production people to make it work.

[@davidkonevky7372]

Fun fact: the catnip thing came from Taylor Swift's dad, so we can all blame her dad for pitching the idea of using the catnip.

[@drg8687]

"What human looking hands I have!" That made me lol

[@NoisyButters]

this video is fantastic thank u for watchin the movie

[@glamcouturequeen]

I love this musical I liked the movie too but maybe because I was high af

[@LibraGamesUnlimited]

That might be the only way to get anything out it. The studio should start passing out drugs at showings.

[@paluxyl.8682]

@Sabrina Owens I love the Cats musical (90s DVD) and I love the Cats movie too , it's my favorite movie of 2019 . Sure the movie is not perfect , I wish some dance scences was longer and I don't like the jokes and the singing of Jennifer Hudson and Ian McKellen was not so good , the role of Taylor Swift was chopped - over 80% of Bombalurina's parts was changed to Jemina ..... but I love the movie . I remember before seen the film my thought was ... this can't be good , but after just 5 minutes everything has changed ..... believe it or not but I have screamed loud : "I love it !" ^^

[@emilyb.8219]

@@paluxyl.8682 ...weird comment

[@paluxyl.8682]

@@emilyb.8219 What is weird with the comment ?

[@Namastephie]

I loved that she kept saying “Mistophoklees” and I laughed every time! 😂

[@charline8531]

"it's like humans wearing meat coats" 😂

[@starbugmechanic5236]

“Cats is the worst thing to happen to cats since dogs”. LMAO!!

[@DokkaChapman]

It's the kind of film that if released 10 years ago you know FOR SURE South Park would do an episode on this weird flick!

[@CrackerJackd]

No one: Not a single soul: Cats: Your name is Grizabella. Because only humans give animals regular names.

[@jeniferdiamond7723]

And yet every dam cat in the movie has a single name, Deuteronomy or Neiteronomy I forget, to Macavity. Why why whyyyyyyyyyy

[@jeniferdiamond7723]

My dogs name is Happy, because I know better then to have a cat that keeps a litter box full up for me to clean.

[@CrackerJackd]

@@jeniferdiamond7723 I have both a cat and multiple dogs. They each have unique challenges, but I've found that cats are pretty self-sustaining aside from the litter box.

[@jeniferdiamond7723]

@@CrackerJackd The problem with internet commenting is that too many people think everything said is about them. They take everything personal. And have to snap back. I don't care if you have a cat or dog or cockroaches that you line up in your kitchen and torment. I was not directing my reply directly at you, but was being a smart ass about why having a cat is not as good as having a dog.

[@CrackerJackd]

@@jeniferdiamond7723 What? Who took something personal?

[@damiendarko9411]

“Ok let’s see what good old Porn Hub’s got going on...” “Wait... Mr. Bigglsworth?” “What have they done to you!”

[@Persepholeigh]

I worked at a cinema while this was playing, and just looking at it was such a nightmare for my autonomationphobia that I refused to go into any of the theatres it was playing in.

[@SebastianAceFawkes]

FOODFIGHT: "I am the Scariest Horror movie of the last decade" CATS: "Hold my Poison"

[@Uptomyknees]

damn i wish movies could still make me this mad

[@gromester1092]

I liked this movie the first time, when it was called The Island of Dr. Moreau

[@aliciaz6224]

the 'In The Heights' trailer is the only thing currently giving me hope for the future of movie musicals...

[@Jehannum2000]

The best advert for this film that I could ever imagine.

[@keylae7412]

Y'all wouldn't do dogs this bad...my chinchilla persian is offended. 😤

[@davemeyers6474]

Maybe Daddy Derek should have been brought in as an adviser.

[@ckline5486]

I think he would have kept trying to get in on the cat orgies.

[@slartibartfast3041]

Thanks for the review. As a Brit, how James Corden can get in anything. He’s as funny as a kick to the private’s.

[@Qwertzalcoatl]

I hate James Corden! He comes off to me as a pretentious asswipe

[@josh44026]

He is in the Illuminati

[@SnozBerryQueen]

Its the accent....

[@Jehannum2000]

@@SnozBerryQueen I've got the same accent, yet I wasn't in Cats. Or fuck all else.

[@josh44026]

he has connections with famous people and companies.

[@ambiguoussarcasm]

As a fan of the musical, I can confirm: that one musical number IS an orgy and the Heavyside Lair is cat heaven/reincarnation.

[@KittyKatt_Luna80s]

Yeah. Literally Grizabella is put through Hell for trying to be different. The Heaviside Layer gives her a chance to restart life anew - hopefully her next life will be abuse and cruelty-free.

[@colleen4ever]

NO it is NOT an orgy!! It's a really fun family friendly musical! It's a group of Cats auditioning for their leader to be the one chosen to have a new life. NOTHING offensive in it AT ALL! Unlike THIS!

[@lokischild5170]

I adored the musical, but dear GOD I HATED THIS MOVIE!!