Ashley's Multiple Stillbirth Story- Don't Talk About the Baby Documentary

This was filmed at our first public filming event in Minnesota, in partnership with the Star Legacy Foundation.
Visit our website to watch the documentary now! Miscarriage, stillbirth and infertility shouldn't be shrouded in secrecy. Learn how to #ShatterTheStigma
www.donttalkaboutthebaby.com
dtatbfilm

[@alicelouiise7620]

i cannot believe they let you loose 3 children before somebody finally figured out what was going on . im so outraged for you. your amazing to have made it through that and still be standing . heroic . your babies would be so proud of their mumma 💕

[@3saphires1garnet15]

This is heartbreaking. A doctor should have diagnosed this before three losses! Your ex husband doesn’t deserve you, so much for vows. I wish you happiness in the future. 💔❤️

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you for the future happiness and listening to my story.

[@anayapapaya4943]

I'm so sorry for her loss. No one deserves to go through something like this. She's so strong for having the courage to talk about this online. I hope this helped her through her grieving process. Also, Her ex husband is a horrible human being for leaving her after something like this because of something she couldn't control. She deserves so much better.

[@HealingSpectrumIntuition]

I would leave my husband if he ever implied that our relationship was that fragile, baby or not...

[@BecD1983]

Jack Manning piece of crap man hey?

[@sunnyb85]

I agree. I just lost my baby on 09/24/20 at 21 weeks but we're not sure why. I feel very low right now as a woman because I feel like I failed. But God says I am valuable therefore I am. She is valuable and so special. She deserved better than her ex husband. She's beautiful and so sweet 💗 God will definitely give her children.

[@FruitBasketyay]

I can't imagine the depths of pain from all your loss, your babies, your husband, I think most of us can't make it through half of that list. You are truly brave and I admire you. I hope you are able to start over and find happiness again.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much. I have found happiness with my life and God. Although I haven't found anyone else to be with but I know God will bring me the person that I'm meant to be with soon.

[@FruitBasketyay]

Ashley Londroche I'm sure you will ! Thanks so much for replying. It makes me truly happy that you are ok.

[@utoobjunkie4902]

you will ! You are a beautiful, caring, intelligent young woman ! The right future husband is out there waiting on a wonderful woman and future wife that is YOU !

[@mommyallred]

Girl, you let it ALL out. I hope you don’t let what others say get to you. I had a stillborn daughter in 2004 and I still think about her daily. I have a healthy (thank God) son that is 12 but one baby does not replace another. Break the silence. I know I do. ❤️❤️❤️ My heart is with you always.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

I am so sorry that you had to go through that. My heart is with you too and thank you.

[@utoobjunkie4902]

hugs and prayers sweetheart....I'm an old labor an delivery nurse from the 80s and 90s and I immediately said it out myself after your first baby that I would bet it was an incompetent cervix I cannot believe Dr's this day in age didn't grasp that the first time so that precautions could be taken. Here I am just a nurse and I KNEW. Shame on them and shame on your husband.......I love you sweetheart, hugs and prayers.....{{{hugs}}} 💔💔💔

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much. It is tough when ppl don't think like that but I'm glad to hear there are ppl who do. I appreciate the kind words and love

[@Saphie420]

@@ashleylondroche3044 many thoughts and love & light be with you !

[@TheSaltySiren]

The frustrating thing is that this is typical of military hospitals. I had a hunch that it was your cervix, and when you lost your third, I knew that’s what had to be the culprit. 😢🙏🏻❤️🙏🏻❤️🙏🏻❤️

[@maryeli9297]

I have an 8yr old but lost my 2nd baby at 25weeks (stillborn). They also said it was an infection. This is the biggest pain I’ve ever been through. I can’t imagine how she went through this 3 times and to top it off have such a heartless man as a husband 💔. Question to the nurse-can your cervix become incompetent after having a child? Now I’m questioning if it was really an infection 🥺

[@barbiecrocker7420]

You are not JUST a nurse. The 90s doesn’t make you old either 😉. You probably won’t see this but you are fantastic and I wish I had you as a nurse.🥰 Ashley, bless you 💙💗. I’m so very sorry! 🙏🏼

[@TheDreamerBelle]

"And although people thought it was crazy, I did it anyway." You have so much courage, so much. I am so sorry for your loss, so sorry that you had doctors who didn't care to look for a cause behind the miscarriages, and I am just so angry at your ex-husband, who in no way ever deserved to share his life with a person so gracious as you. You are not better off without him- you are just bigger than him, too much for him, too shining and bright. Ashley, there's this story that everyone knows- you are a child, you grow up, you find someone to marry, you marry them, you have children, you raise them in love, you grow old, you die. It's a story, it's a dream, and you and your husband shared it, tried to fulfill it together, but here is where your husband fails utterly, where he broke his vows to you, because he promised to stand beside you, he said 'In sickness and in health' and he lied, he didn't weather the storm, he left you in that maelstrom. He didn't change the shape of his dream to walk beside you, because blindly following along our culture's LifeScript was more important to him than his love for you or his concern for your mental health. No, instead he just tossed you aside like a television with no picture or a car without wheels. Like some broken thing unable to fulfill its purpose. You are not broken, Ashley. You are so, so, so strong. There is nothing wrong with you. Nothing.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much for watching and for your comments. I appreciate it so much. Such a loss can be hard on people, which is why you have to truly keep those who stand by you close. Your kind words are so encouraging, thank you.

[@meganmendez839]

😭im so sorry😭 you dont need a man like him. U deserve the world.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you.

[@Anastashya]

Ashley, you have been through way too much pain; more than anyone should ever have to suffer. I’m so very sorry 💔 and so very sorry for the loss of your sweet babies. 🕊🕊🕊 I know of a girl who suffers the very same condition as you, and after one lost baby she was diagnosed correctly. Two years ago she fell pregnant again and received a cervical stitch. She carried her baby to 38 weeks and was induced just to be on the safe side, so please don’t ever think you can’t have a baby again. You ARE a mother currently of angels, but one day your arms will be full ♥️🙏🏼♥️ x

[@ashleylondroche3044]

🥰 That is so sweet for you to say and encouraging. It’s good to know the stitch worked for others.

[@princesspippy7]

I lost 2 to the same thing at around the same gestation too. I don't think I could've talked to openly like you did. you're incredibly strong.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much for the kind words. I'm so sorry for your loss and hope you continue to have healing. Thank you for watching

[@AdvantageousAngie]

I can't even imagine, that is so terrible what you went through. I'm sorry you had to go through it, and without the proper support you needed. You are such an incredibly strong woman.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much. I appreciate the wonderful comment.

[@erinstuffer85]

Ashley Londroche

[@caragh87]

I am so sorry for the losses you suffered. I am also sorry for the lack of compassion and empathy you suffered.

[@ejadep123]

When she started the third story I couldn’t believe it. How awful. Just a nightmare.

[@VictoriaisaDiamond]

I cannot share her pain, even though I lost a baby also, but I send all the strength, a million hugs, and a million rays of sunshine to you. Keeping you and your stillborn babies in my prayers!

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much.

[@VictoriaisaDiamond]

+Ashley Londroche Dearest Ashley thank you so much for finding the time to respond! Ever since hearing your story (thanks so much for sharing this intimare tragedy) you've crossed my thoughts again and again! How are you today? Have you been able to stabelize yourself, with help of your family and friends? You also deserve a much more sincere husband/partner at your side, hoping and praying that you found someone! Please let me know if you need a shoulder or anything, as I'd be glad to exchange E-mail adresses with you! Hugs from across the ocean, in Europe!

[@VictoriaisaDiamond]

+Ashley Londroche Add: in a few weeks it is an anniversary of my mother who passed on way too early! As I have a mass read for her at that time, I will gladly include your sweet departed babies also! Love you dear, Hugs!

[@ashleylondroche3044]

I'm doing quite well and have had some amazing love and support from my family and close friends. I've been able to truly rely on my love for God which has brought me peace throughout The years. I appreciate the kind words and know that God will bring me continuous happiness. The prayers are always welcome and thank you for the support. That would be great to exchange email addresses. Hugs to you!

[@ashleylondroche3044]

I appreciate the well thoughts. I'm doing well and one day will have the husband that will love me more than I can think. Thanks for the hugs and love from across the ocean. We can certainly exchange email addresses. :)

[@ScousersWife]

I experienced a miscarriage at 11.5 weeks, and that was devastating. I can't even imagine how horrible this must have been and must still be. And to have your husband leave after all that loss. I like to imagine myself holding my baby in Heaven. You have three beautiful babies to hold for all eternity. That doesn't stop the pain in this life, though, and my heart hurts so much for what you've been through. Thank you for sharing your story. It must have been so tough to do that.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you for sharing part of your story with me. I am so appreciative of your love and support. It is nice to know that they felt no pain and are in heaven. ❤

[@judyholiday1794]

My beautiful mother experienced two full term still births before she was finally blessed with me..After she gave birth to me they decided not to try again..I lost my mother when I was 16 so I never really got to talk to her about her loss and to be honest I never heard her talk about it..Being an only did make me interested and I asked my auntie about them and she told me their names and that both were home births and she remembered my mother holding my brother and she said that both babies weighed over 9 lbs and had a head full of thick black hair .I am so sorry for your loss and I wish you years of happiness and health..After listening to your story it took me back to my mother and how heartbroken she must have been..😢 Stay strong your story will and has touched others ..

[@ashleylondroche3044]

❤❤ I’m so sorry for your mother’s loss. I’m sure it was hard on her. Thank you so much for the encouragement. ❤❤

[@sleepingbaby927]

i lost my beautiful baby boy at 42 weeks on the 24th February 2019 i miss him with every breath i take and i love him with every broken pieces of my heart

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Oh my, I'm so sorry for your loss. You are so strong for sharing and being open to talk about it. You will always miss him. We (this community is there for you) are there for you any time.

[@laurasinfield2431]

42 weeks?? why did the hospital let you go that long..that is dreadful..so sad x

[@sleepingbaby927]

@@laurasinfield2431 i have no idea why they let me go 2 weeks overdue

[@cherylleaman2930]

So sorry 😢the birthday party is a great idea and it's about you and your babies and know one els .I had 4 miscarriages due to a rupture appendix and scar tissue God was so Grace full I have a daughter of 22 she finish her honors in fine art .She painted 2 canvases canvases like a puzzle one is me and my four babies I lost and never seen. 4 Babies with wings she call it the garden of pain and the other canvase its her the garden of healing when she bought it home from varsity I cried I realize my babies is in heaven and one day I will see them cause no one understand if they did not go through The paintings hang on the signature wall for her to remember her brothers and sister I feel your pain and I'm praying that God of comfort be.with you You so brave❤

[@DreuThomas-tf2ts]

😢 I'm so sorry for your loss of your sweet boy

[@ktfoote88]

I am so very sorry for the loss of your sweet babies. I cannot imagine your pain. I don't think I will ever forget about your story. Prayers and love to you, and I pray you find healing in sharing your stories.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much. I was able to find healing but I'm glad you could watch it. I appreciate your love and prayers.

[@sehuunsky8798]

A thought of loosing one baby is unbearable... Experiencing that nightmare 3 times is unimaginable... I'm truly sorry it happened to you & your husband left you during this awful time! He showed you his true character. He didn't deserve you. Look at the big picture. Seems to me you are better off without him. I don't understand why some people compare loss of their parents, grandparents etc with loss of stillborn babies that did not even have a chance to begin with. It seems so inappropriate. I hope you find strength to move on with your life, find peace & love... Don't give up!

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much for the kind words and love and support. I did eventually find a way better man and grouper of people who are supportive.

[@CatchRainFertility]

It felt like such an intimate privilege to hear your story. What a lot it must have taken to talk it all the way through. I am so sad and sorry that it took them so long to realise about your cervix. I work with ladies who have been through similar experiences, and with each of your pregnancy stories I hoped I would hear that they checked your cervix. I believe that you are their spiritual mum and have brought them as far as their little souls were ready to go. I wish you so much love and peace for the future and I really hope that if you are ever able and ready that you have a chance to have a baby and are properly looked after in the future. Xxx

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much for such a beautiful comment. I appreciate you watching and I hope this story can help many other women you know out there. I believe that God will provide a wonderful new guy in my life and that I will have a child one day. But I'm so grateful for your comment.

[@BPrine915]

I just want to crawl through the screen and give you a hug. Thank you for sharing your story. For being so brave. I hope you find peace in the future.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much. I have found lots of peace with Gods love. I appreciate your kind words and watching.

[@Nihonrabu]

There are no words for what you had to go through. I'm sitting here bawling my eyes out thinking how unfair this world is. I really wish you all the best and that you find ways to deal with all this pain you didn't deserve ❤️❤️❤️

[@lexicab7197]

I'm a RN but I'm not even a labor and delivery nurse. I'm not done watching the video. However I am absolutely enraged at the medical care you have received. There's blatant incompetence. I am so sorry that you have been through the hardest thingbabkother can go through. 3 times. Your ex-husband is definitely someone you are better off without. I am so sorry. You don't deserve any of what you've been through. Pain and grief like this doesn't ever go completely away. I pray God's grace, peace, and understanding find you. You deserve peace, happiness, and wholeness. I'm so sorry.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

🥰 Thank you so much for your kind words, love, support and prayers.

[@brides91]

This is such a strong woman. I can't even imagine all she's been through xx

[@cindymaun8952]

Oh my dear, I'm so very sorry for your incomprehensible losses. Your ex and the doctors who waited for the third loss to figure out the issue is unbelievable. Bless you. Hugs.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you ❤

[@sroutlaw1]

Ashley, I don't know if you read the comments here, but I appreciate that you showed the pictures and the urns, and that you were so honest about the reactions that others had about this. You have really educated me about how I need to be more sensitive even still to look those pictures over as they are babies, truly loved and wanted. I went into hospital at 19 weeks, in ER, with contractions and bleeding, and was told to go home to miscarry, at age 39. With some unknown and total random luck, I did not miscarry, but the contractions came back at week 21 and I was hospitalized for three weeks, with 16 weeks of bedrest. My child, my miracle, was born three weeks shy of my fortieth birthday. Your stories about the early bleeding and contracting hit home with me so very hard. Honey, I am so sorry. If I could give you a hug I would. Your babies were beautiful and they will always always be your babies. Your ex-husband couldn't handle the stress as well as you have - believe it or not, you truly have been amazing in all of this, and I truly believe your rainbow baby is out there at the end of a successful cerclage. Mama bear prayers for you.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Stephanie, thank you so much for telling me your story and listening to mine. I'm so happy for you that you got your wonderful baby but I do know the pain and the fear that comes with all of this. I appreciate your comment about my babies and the encouraging words. I also truly believe I will have a rainbow baby some day. Thanks for the prayers too. :)

[@polkaroo69]

Wow... to the woman in this video: watching you tell us your story was so heartbreaking. I just wanted to give you a hug the whole time. After recently having experienced loss myself, though not nearly to the degree that you have... my heart pours out to you. The wounds heal, but the scars are forever

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much for your comment and watching.

[@biancapiek6943]

You are an inspiration You are strong You are amazing Never have i ever even heard of a story close to yours And yet you are strong through the tears I pray for u And im so very extremely sorry for you’re loss Please forgive me if thats the wrong thing to say as im sure you have heard it a million times over but i fail to get any other words to say Please know that every woman out there that has lost a child is holding ur hand and sending you hugs My dear you inspire me To get up Be strong and carry on As im writing this im hoping to be pregnant as i had a miscarriage 2 months ago U made me have courage and believe that it happens as it should The way God intended it I don’t know u But i admire love and find you an inspiration Hope to get read this BIANCA from SOUTH AFRICA🤗😘

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Bianca, Thank you so much for the kind words. I'm so glad I'm able to help you and encourage you through this journey. I'm so sorry for your loss but know you are not alone and we are truly here for you. You have so much courage to not only watch my video and reply, but to truly try again. I'm so grateful that I'm able to inspire you to keep trying and that God's love is truly surrounding you. Thanks- Ashley

[@nicole9107]

Ashley, I literally just want to give you a hug. Thank you, so much for being such a amazing, inspirational person. I really do wish you happiness and peace in your future.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you Nicole. I'm glad I can inspire others.

[@angiep10]

Ashley Londroche sending you love

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you

[@stevenblackden4363]

Ashley Londroche have you had successful pregnancy and live birth yet

[@BethOnoffrey]

Ashley, no mom should have to bury one child let alone 3. I just want to hug you and hold you in my arms and let you cry. To your family who said basically get over it forget it that you can't have birth announcements for those babies they need to get over it. Those babies had a life they lived inside of you. You have every right to have those birth announcements and to send them to everybody. I am so sorry for your loss. Words can't even describe how sorry I am. Big hugs hun. Lots of prayers.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much.

[@ODAATaaangie]

thankyou for telling us your story, my heart breaks for you. All of your babies are beautiful and I am so truly sorry for your loss. My daughter has been through a similar situation and when she wants to talk about her baby we just do! No matter how much time passes I hope you'll always have someone to talk to about your much loved babies xxx

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much. I'm so sorry for your loss as that can be tough but it's good to hear that your there and allow her to talk. I do have some friends and family who will do just that. Thank you for watching

[@jamiebluemel3186]

this poor poor woman. im so so sorry for your losses. you will see your sweet babies again. xoxo

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Jamie Bluemel thank you

[@dianakidd5688]

Such a heart breaking series of loses ~ My heart goes out to you & your family. I had 4 miscarriages & found, as you did, that people just don’t know what to say…they prefer we don’t speak of the lose, but we Need to. Thank you for sharing her grief and your story.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you for sharing your story, the little that you did share. Talking about it brings awareness and connectivity to others. Thank you for the love and support.

[@rozeerustic5477]

BTW, I PITY your ex husband. He lost a wonderful, beautiful woman, inside and out, when he pulled his roots up. He is nothing less than a very weak man.

[@norahabdulsathaar4243]

@Helen Hines just. Wow.

[@alin6322]

Helen Hines I had lost a child at 23 weeks due to an incompetent cervix. I’ve had one healthy pregnancy since thankfully to a cerclage. Both pregnancies were c sections. Now with my current boyfriend, he has no biological children, and we want a child together. Because of my previous c sections and other health conditions we could potentially have complications during the pregnancy. I understand what you have wrote, when you look at it that way however the first thing my boyfriend told me was if we don’t have a child together I want you to know that I’m not going anywhere, I love you and I love Leo (my son from a previous relationship) he’s my boy and I will give my all to him because that’s what A MAN does. They don’t run, they stay through the thickest. Us women who have trouble carrying our babies are the ones that are the toughest and most strongest and are the ones who would do absolutely anything for our babies. We are also the ones who have endured the most hurt but we stand up tall in the end and we keep trying knowing there could be more hurting for us. You don’t think we fight with ourselves everyday, how we feel we have failed as women. So evolution, science, biology whatever, is bullshit! Primal instinct?! Men date men, women date women, biologically they can not make babies, isn’t our “natural” instinct to fiend for the opposite sex and procreate? You can kiss my toes with your whole speech and shame on you.

[@catherinegee2741]

Im so sorry. I have lost 2. One at 21 and one at 24 weeks. It still hurts years later. God bless you.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

I am so sorry. The pain will never go away but you are strong as well to keep moving forward. God bless you as well.

[@sarajeandesroshers1860]

I cannot believe you hospital and dr and nurses treated you like that. I can't not believe that professional people did not help you with your situation. I am so sorry for your losses. You have a beautiful light and glow in your face when you talk about those precious babies. I am so glad you chose to tell your story and know that you are not alone. Thank you. ✨⭐️✨

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much for watching and the kind words.

[@yuurih92]

I cant even imagine how you feel. I mean, the loss of your third child and your husband wanting a divorce would make me feel like I wasn't good enough. You are INCREDIBLY strong. I am actually in shock. I don't know if I could go through all that myself and still try to live normally. I am so sorry for your loss and I sincerely hope you have/find people you can share your story with that are going to support you. I will try my best if someone close to me goes through something similar. Thank you for sharing your story ❤

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you for watching. I truly appreciate it and the kind words.

[@olivedog1880]

how can people be so mean! this woman is so strong, how could people say she just wanted sympathy?! wow, there are no words

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much for your kind words.

[@ViolinTreble]

This one got me the most. This poor sweet beautiful mama. I knew right away after the first is was IC. Shame on these doctors and shame on the husband and family. She said it best that you just can't imagine losing three children. I hope you are blessed with a beautiful baby and they will take all of your pain away. Sweet mama I think of you

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Aww thank you so much. I truly appreciate it.

[@snailbrozMC]

I’m so sorry you lost your three precious babies. I lost two babies in 11 months. No one ever talks about the PTSD and extreme grief you go through when this happens. It’s been 22 years and I was lucky enough to have my son after losing my son and daughter and the pain of loss is still with me. My only comfort is that they will be waiting for me when I pass over. I’m so sorry your husband abandoned you - you deserved better than that and my heart and prayers are with you.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you for your support. I'm so sorry for your losses, that must have been extra hard to lose them so close together. There is so much PTSD and mental health issues that really happen after such losses. I've come to realize that the pain and remembrance of my babies will always be with me no matter what. Thank you for the kind words and prayers.

[@amberwestfall720]

This is so sad! I was the same when people kept saying “maybe god has a plan for you”, “maybe it wasn’t meant to be”, or “just be happy she’s in a better place and not suffering”. Everyone kept telling me “good thing you didn’t go further along in pregnancy cause your beautiful tattoo on your stomach would look weird plus that god you didn’t get stretch marks! At that point everyone who spoke to me that I stopped talking to them because those are words you don’t say! I distant myself from everyone only talk to a few who understood what I was going through. Those people and even group chats of losing you baby helped me a lot

[@ashleylondroche3044]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I can see the distance from friends but I'm glad you have people in your life to help you. I agree the people in group chats are very supportive.

[@snailbrozMC]

I was shocked when I had people say maybe it was for the best. No mother should go through losing their child it is heartbreaking.

[@carolnygaard136]

Ashley, I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope and pray that you find some happiness and love in your life. You deserve it. My sister had the same type of problem. She had one child delivered prematurely. Thank heavens she lived. The next pregnancy, they sewed her cervix up until right before her next baby was born. I wish that you had gotten the same care that she did. There is no excuse for having to go through it three times like you did. Please know that hugs and prayers are coming your way!!

[@ashleylondroche3044]

🥰 Thank you so much for the prayers and hugs.

[@carolnygaard136]

@@ashleylondroche3044 Ashley, After all you've been through, you deserve so much. May God continue to Bless You and your family. You're doing such a good thing by sharing your story. I know that it must be very hard for you even now.

[@amyleclerc3238]

Ohhh my sweetest girl, your beautiful and God has been preparing you for the important assignment He has called you to. Going through the most incredible loss we can endure as a mother. I don't know just what God's plan will be to bring goodness through all you have walked through but what I am so completely sure of is that whatever God chooses to bring you through He already knew you were chosen to go through because He knew your heart was pure and humble and you are now able to have a true empathy for others in a way you could have only received by actually experiencing this type of devastating and deep heartache where your heart actually hurts. Your kindness and compassion and acceptance in your heart for God is going to bless so many because you will be able to comfort and share with them your own story and as God heals and restores all that has been remembered as tragic, will in time with God's love, become a part of your life and each time you're able to share about your babies, who opened their little eyes in Heaven, and you will see as you carry on moving forward in your life, you will see how each time you share that you are able to see more of the love of Christ fill you with a newfound joy even through the pain. So keep speaking about your 1 Daughter and 2 precious sons and soon you will have the blessing bestowed on you and by God's grace.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

❤ thank you so much. I really appreciate it.

[@elwi1670]

Ashley, I just wanted to say thank you so much for being courageous enough to share your story and your pain. It is so helpful to those of us trying to get through stillbirth and better understand it for our loved ones. The love you have for your children and the effort you put in trying for them is obvious. So is your devastation at their loss. You have experienced tragedy and used it to bless others. What a remarkable example! Sending hugs, peace and comfort!

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Elizabeth Willian thank you

[@bex_gemini]

My heart aches so bad for you. I lost a baby and you never forget them. I was so angry with God. "why would you do this to a woman who wanted a child so bad? " It gets easier with time, but you'll never be the same again. Hugs to you Ashley.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much. It is tough but God definitely brought me peace.

[@marys2382]

Ashley, I just want to cry with you. There's a big lump in my throat. I'm a maternity nurse and have done those footprints and photos. It's hard on our end too, but nothing like what you're going through. We try so hard to give you as many memories as possible. It's a confirmation of the life of that child. I lost my first baby. I cried everyday for two months.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much for the love and support. Those footprints and photos were all I had and o cherish them all the time. Thank you for doing that for so many others. The pain is great but I know God has given me strength to continue. Thank you for watching and for continuing to love on all the mothers at the maternity ward.

[@sushilover40]

What a heart wrenching story. I'm so very sorry for your loss darling. I cannot even imagine the hollow feeling inside.... You're in my thoughts. Sending love and vibes of peace and comfort. ❤

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much

[@divrana4653]

What a courageous woman you are.....I have lost my first born from life snatching illness “Sepsis” .... I really feel the agony of you going through multiple stillbirth....my broken heart goes out to you and sends you love..... you are an inspiration and a marvellous woman.... we will always be the “Special” mothers of this world as our babies live in heaven.. x

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much Div. I'm so sorry that you had to lose a baby, what pain you must have endured and I give you virtual hugs for that. Yes, I agree we are the "special" mothers of this world and I appreciate the kind and uplifting words.

[@adrianaguillen2116]

Ashely I am very sorry for your losses! You are very brave to come and tell your story. Your ex husband is just a pathetic man, he lost a great woman, he does not deserve you. May God bring peace, courage and love to your life and I wish I could come and give you a big hug and become your friend. Do not lose your faith!

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much. I wouldn't have gotten through this without God.

[@adrianaguillen2116]

Amen sister! Remember that one day you will reunite with your angels for eternity!🙏❤

[@barbarahall7776]

I am SO sorry. And I wish this organization didn't need to have their info plastered across the screen tje entire video.💗

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you

[@Lee-lg7mz]

I just lost my baby girl at 32 weeks I delivered her stillborn on 7/29/18 my heart goes out to you...thanks for sharing your story

[@ashleylondroche3044]

I am so sorry! This is such a hard loss. Please know you are not alone. You have a wonderful baby and she is beautiful. I hope that this can help you in anyway.

[@biancadistefano4909]

Thank you for being vocal about it. I'm sorry that people don't know how to deal with hard things. You are lovely.

[@nealam100]

So incredibly sorry for the loss of your beautiful children. The lack of compassion from everyone around you...especially your husband is so very sad. I'm so so sorry you have had to experience all this pain. May God provide you with peace and comfort as only he can. Your story is so powerful and I pray God blesses you abundantly in the future. Your children will never be forgotten and I thank you for sharing your story.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much for watching and your sympathy. It means so much for you to comment and I hope it helps others understand and grieve as well. God has continued to bless me and help me find comfort and love in Him.

[@ambermarie7204]

Thank you for braving the camera and sharing your story.. I’m sure you don’t feel strong but wow does your strength come across on the screen like a beacon. May you find someone who can respect and admire your strength, grieve with you your children, and be brave enough to stand with you whatever you choose to do in your life, especially if you choose to put your heart on the line and try again.. God be with you

[@HeavenOnEarth.Animals]

We have been torched by infertility for many years. Thought how unfair the life had been to us. BUT just now my eyes had opened. Infertility is walk through the park compare to stillbirth. THANK YOU FOR SHARING!!!

[@ashleylondroche3044]

I'm glad I could help in anyway.

[@Familyman329]

Thank you for sharing. It's so painful. I'm sorry you have suffered so much. My wife and I are waiting to see if she's miscarried again... waiting is hard. Thank you for sharing your vulnerable story. There's such a taboo of this loss. It's not as lonely to hear other's experiences.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you. I’m sorry you had to go through such a loss. There is very much a taboo as we don’t talk about it. I’m glad I can hell you and your wife know you are not alone.

[@zelahfines6535]

Your then husband sounds absolutely dreadful. The fact you had to go through losing 3 children with such an unsupportive partner makes me so sad. I’m so sorry for the loss of your beautiful babies 💕

[@ashleylondroche3044]

❤ thank you for watching and your love.

[@cindygarwood109]

I'm so sorry about the loss of your precious babies. I can't begin to imagine the pain and grief you must feel. I'm sad that you have to deal with the ignorance of people who don't realize (or care) when they say hurtful and insensitive things . Thank you for making this video. I hope people will realize that losing a baby is Not just a "Passing phase that you will get over soon". Most people really don't know what to say (or not say) to allow others to express feelings after any death, especially a baby or a child. I'm so sorry about your marriage ending too... You deserve to have been treated so much better! God's Blessings!

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much for watching. And yes many people don't understand but I'm glad people can see this and grasp a better concept of what to say. I appreciate your kind words and support.

[@lainey7427]

Omgosh this is probably one of the cruelest life stories I’ve ever heard. I am so so sorry mama. I hope you have found some healing and peace. ❤

[@ashleylondroche3044]

❤❤ thank you so much. I have been able to find healing and peace and love again.

[@rozeerustic5477]

Thank you so much for allowing us the privilege of listening to your story. You've graced us with this video, and insight. You grieved as an individual without a "script", in your own way, perhaps helping others in their grief through yours. Be PROUD of that. I pray for nothing less than a miracle in your life. I'm old enough to be your grandmother, but you have taught ME, grace, and empathy. Your past and future children are so proud of you! ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Rozee Rustic thank you so much.

[@kathyhellard9816]

In 1980 and 1981 I had two beautiful baby boys at 25 and 28 weeks. One lived one hour the second lived two days. I was then diagnosed as a DES daughter and required a cerclage with my next two pregnancies. I have a 37 year old son and a 35 year old daughter and now I’m a grandmother. I’m so sorry for your losses but there is hope. I truly know your pain except for the part of your husband. He is inexcusable!

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much for the hope. It is encouraging to know that someone has gone through it and it’s been successful.

[@leset8604]

Not sure how I stumbled across this video...but I watched from beginning to end. My thoughts and prayers are with you as you continue to journey through life. You showed incredible strength, and your faith in God is pure. I know He has great things in store for your life. Be blessed!

[@libbimeade6944]

Sweet lady. You were way too good for such a cruel husband. I hope you have found the happiness you deserve.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you. I have found great happiness after such a tragedy.

[@garthfd]

Thank you for sharing. A true woman in all her power. Thank you

[@CatchRainFertility]

I am so sad to hear your story. What feels so hard is that they never gave you answers. Why did nobody check your cervix? You must feel so many things... My heart goes out to you and I really cannot believe anyone can go through so much. Thank you for sharing your story. Was a privilege to listen. X

[@naturallycorry4159]

I'm very sorry for your losses... I also lost a baby I was 38weeks pregnant, I didn't have any answers of her death, I know the pain of losing a child it's indescribable... It's been almost 2years already and still hurting like it happens yesterday... May God remember you and bless you. Hugs!!!

[@olivedog1880]

so sorry for your loss, I've also been in the same boat, and it sucks. I hope u went on to have a healthy baby, God bless

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Oh I'm so sorry for your loss losing a child is not easy at all. No matter how long they've been gone it will hurt and will alway miss them. I hope you continue to find Gods love and blessings and you are string for going through this loss. Hugs to you too.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you for watching and I'm sorry you were in the same boat. I hope you had a healthy baby too

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much. It is tough but I'm sure God has wonderful plans for me.

[@biomammy]

Ashley you were so brave in telling your story! I am very sorry for your losses! I wish you lots of happiness! A big big hug from me!

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much and I'm glad you were able to watch it. I appreciate the hug

[@JOXGIRL1]

I’m sorry for your loss. It’s a stupid comment and I no longer know what to say to a person, who is grieving. Going through my losses actually strengthen me. I accepted anything people said as long as it felt that were doing their part to care about me. Hoping that you have been able to move forward, Never forgetting but holding on to those precious babies in your heart.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much for the love and support. ❤️❤️

[@mercedeslove6130]

You are amazing, and we all think you should NEVER feel bad talking about your beautiful children. they were here, and are with you still. we love and support you!

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Mercedes Love thank you so much. :)

[@MahasSaham79]

There are no words for the pain and loss you have suffered and continue to suffer💖 Soul ties will always keep your children with you, and though they are not here physically, their spirits are still with you and they continue to grow on the other side. The man that was your husband...is a selfish sob and your a beautiful Momma - Always 💖

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much.

[@nikitaharper7154]

this is the most heart breaking thing ever, you are truely an inspiration for being so brave to tell your story. such a devastating thing especially 3 times!! I had a miscarriage last year at 12 weeks and it broke me in two, never mind this you are such a strong person and i hope one day you'll find someone who loves you for who you are. x

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Nikita Harper thank you and I'm sorry for your loss

[@bonnienash8585]

Watching this the empathy I feel for you is overwhelming you are such a strong wonderful women. Are you getting any support now? Do not listen to people trying to stop you from talking you have every right and healing will only happen when you are allowed to grieve for your babies. How dare anyone tell you not to express your emotions. Honestly I wish I could take all your pain away , I pray life changes for you and you find someone special. All my love to you x

[@pamowen3452]

I wept while you spoke, I lost my first child at 25 weeks so I get you!❤

[@robertivers4200]

I had a full term stillbirth and I understand the loneliness one has to endure. The father also bailed. Excruciating pain. But 3??? God bless you for what you endured

[@user-sn7od9nn4t]

My first baby was stillborn at 34 weeks due to placental abruption. I was very ill from blood loss. This was in the 60s and you didn't see or hold your babies. My husband, mom and sister buried my so who we named Paul. My daughter was born that following year and she was fine. When my daughter was 2, I was again 34 weeks pregnant and hemorrhaged again from placental abruption. My baby boy Jeremy died 4 hours after birth. Again I never saw him and my family had to bury him. Two years later I had a lovely baby boy and he was fine. My sister had suffered the same problem and her baby Dawn also died. Back then we never got to see our babies! 😢

[@DeadlyRoses91]

Your story is totally heartbreaking. I am so sorry you had to go through all of that pain and heartache.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you Bri.

[@akk6363]

Ashley, You look like such a decent young woman and you handled this sad situation like a very brave person. May God bless you and your babies.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much

[@janariks-kull4]

I watched your story and cried. I am so very sorry for the loss of your babies. May them rest in heavenly peace. 😢

[@fernviking7909]

I’m so sorry you had to go thru this & that it ended your marriage. I hope you have a great life now! Bless you sweetie!

[@ashleylondroche3044]

❤thank you!

[@kaitlyndobson3281]

Many prays for you. I have only had one baby lost at 18 weeks.You are so brave to have gone through this. My marriage ended in divorce too shortly after. Stay strong. You will find happiness again!

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much. I am so sorry that you lost such a beautiful baby. Remember you are not alone. We both are brave. I'm sorry your marriage went bad, it is such a hard thing to explain to spouse and understand how to help them.

[@howlingwolf899]

Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep should be available at all hospitals. They are trained in what to/what not to do/say & their photographs (they also edit the pics to remove any signs of death as well doing a stupendous job w something so hard) are the absolute best. I believe they have many resources for parents/entire family as well

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you! I delivered once in a military base and after that I wasn’t aware till months after my third loss about them nor did the doctors tell me about Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep. I have heard they are amazing though.

[@kellyb8659]

My heart broke for you...I could not stop crying...all I wanted to do was give you a hug. Your strength is amazing. I am so sorry for the loss of your little ones

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much for watching and empthizing. All my strength has come from God and I'm glad it can show and help others. Thanks.

[@nataliaomelchenko397]

The scariest and most heartbreaking story I have ever seen on youtube. Hugs, kisses, I hope you found the happiness and love! You are strong, smart, caring. I hope you are in a good place of your life now.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you for watching and the kind words. I am in a good place of my life now.

[@standup2982]

I'm so incredibly sorry for the loss of your darling babies 💔❤

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you

[@Tanja060100]

I am so very sorry for your loss!

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you

[@hayleyfuffypants99]

I'm so sorry you had to go through something so horrific, so many times. And I'm also disappointed that your ex-husband wasn't there to support you afterwards. Shows what kind of a man he really is. I hope one day you are blessed with a healthy, full term baby and find the strength to cope with your losses.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much. That is my hope as well. I've had lots of other ppl in my life who have helped me and given me strength along with my faith in God. Thank you for the well wishes.

[@crustyrash]

Ashley, Thank you for having the courage to share your story. I remember being with my grandmother after my aunt (her daughter) died, and her talking about how your child is not supposed to die before you. I think no one but a mother can know what this is like. As hard as it is and with all your pain and sorrow, I hope you can get some small comfort in knowing that so many people may be touched by your story, I know I am.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much for watching and reaching out. It does bring me lots of comfort to hear others are comforted and uplifted by my story.

[@sueal2191]

I lost 3 babies due to miscarriges around 8 weeks , I was devasted everytime. I think about them all the time. God bless you , you are a strong women .

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you. I'm so sorry for your loss as that is a pain that never goes away. You are strong too for going through such a loss too.

[@nancy-katharynmcgraw2669]

As former NICU RN and Bereavement Support Counselor, I hear your pain. In some hospitals, there are programs that are designed for support of parents, grandparents, surviving siblings & other relatives. When I was working in this field, the programs were only hospital based if an RN had gone to further training, usually not paid for by the employer in the early 1980's. The he/she had to put a proposal before the OB/GYN division at the hospital to support this hospital wide training for Bereaved parents. I received my training through a group out of LaCrosse, Wisconsin. The general idea was to affix a purple ribbon on the outside of the hospital room door. The entire hospital staff went through training, so it would be known that a baby had died to the Mom in the room; before each staff person entered the room. We also learned ways to photograph these precious babies, including using size-appropriate bear, or other another animal. Also to use a tiny blanket & to not show this precious baby as a "specimen on a green surgical towel". I remember all of the babies & families for whom I was their primary care nurse. I, when appropriate, took photos with family and friends available, as many families do when generational photos are taken for memories. I have read about some programs, where a special crib is provided for the baby to stay in the room with Mom & other family members, for bonding, sharing moments & family time, before their baby is rzken to the morgue, waiting for the funeral home to pick up the baby, if as old or older than the state laws allow for a funeral home staff to care for the baby or for pregnancy loss remains. Some groups have support meetings through the delivering hospital. As in your xase, you were in a high risk hospital, farther away from home, and many parents stated that they did not want to go back to that hospital where their baby died. When I was working in a small (7800-ish people) town hospital, I was running a parent support group & for as long as the need met the hospital criteria, was able to provide comfort, teaching and allow connections between attending families, as they wanted &/or needed to. At one time, I was able to also have a Dad's only support group, per this group's request, as many resluze , men & women most often grieve differently & have much less support once returning to work. So many parents see themselves going through this grief alone, as it is one of several topics that usually is NOT publicly spoken aloud.

[@nancy-katharynmcgraw2669]

Sorry for the mispellings. Eventually the hospital disbanded the support group as the room we used was "needed for a larger group", even though I had usually more than 1 family attend. I then moved the group to my local United Methodist church with the consent of the minister (& wife had also gone through the grieving process of a stillborn son, 20+ years earlier) and the congregation. There were quit a few women & couples who came to me throughout the next few years I ran this support group, sharing their stories from 20-60 years ago; many sharing stories of babies whom had died as they were growing up in the late 1800's and 1900's. I was once told a Mom never forgets & the older Moms shared how they wish the had pictures, or even footprints or even the blanket the baby was wrapped in. Some even shared that they wished they had been awake enough to see that baby. While in that small town hospitsl & the one prior, I can remember making trips to & from the morgue, to bring back the baby's body in a warmed blanket for the parent(s) to hold "one last tim", before tha funeral home took possession of their baby for preparation of burial or cremation. When the baby had obvious birth defects, it seemed the parents' focus was on the perfect areas - hands, feet, the nose or ears; something they could touch & remember. When I last held the support group, we put together a Remembering Service. We designed this celebration of memories that included music choices, used a pine tree from which to hang hearts (of purple construction paper) with handwritten names of these babies, or the family's name, or the Mom's name, or unnamed baby; the families then took those hearts home. We encouraged the grieving family to design and use a Memory box, in which to keep these items in adding to them sympathy & birthday cards, footprints, blanket pieces, etc. I kept in contact with those parents for 13 months after their baby's birth. There were several family with a surviving twin or multiple whom also came to this support group. I grew up knowing g babies died: my father's father's first wife & baby died in childbirth in 1923. In 1981, I married my husband whose 1st Mom died in childbirth as did the baby boy, in 1965. I feel God's PEACE when I have shared these types of stories with others and I felt supported when in 1986, I, too, had a miscarriage and found myself moving through & back & forth through the grief steps as shared by Kubler-Ross.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

What amazing training that you had in regards to these losses. The pictures and other items I got from the hospital were all I had of my children and I cherish them. Thank you for doing this for families like mine as well as leading a support group for the mothers and the dads. It really isn't something that is publicly spoken aloud and is so taboo that people don't even want to speak of it. You have a great heart to want to help the families of miscarriages and stillborns. It is so true that a mother never forgets, we get scared we will but ultimately we never will. I'm sorry for your miscarriage and the miscarriage of your family, although I know there are so many women and men out there so grateful for your help and ability to help them through their grief process. I'm not sure if you are still in nursing but I hope that you are able to cherish the wonderful memories you provided to parents who really needed them. Thank you so much for your insight and sharing your story.

[@karenberhow7483]

I just want to hug her! I know there is nothing I can do or say to make it better so I won't even try. Just sending you hugs and praying for your future.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Karen Berhow thank you for watching and the virtual hug.

[@dvsdawl]

The doctors absolutely let you down. I’m so so sorry.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you

[@hpowe1]

I just want to hug this young woman.

[@ka1luna]

I am sorry for your loss and grateful for your courage and strength. Thank you for this video. I wish you all the best in the future.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much for watching. I appreciate you'd kind words well wishes.

[@TheEnglandknp]

Heartbreaking. Just heartbreaking. I am so sorry for your losses. My daughter lost her first born and it is so awful. You sound like an amazing person.

[@rubia218]

Your such a brave woman. I lost two babies back to back. It so horrible. Im glad you spoke about your experience because it made me feel that I am not alone. You are an amazing women.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you so much and I'm glad you don't feel alone. It is a tough thing to go through, but we made it and can through God. Thank you and you are a great woman too.

[@melissa63881]

This story is so heartbreaking, I am so sorry for all of your loss.

[@ashleylondroche3044]

Thank you!

[@lisagunn4915]

I feel so so bad for u.You've been through so much and top it all off with EXTREMELY RUDE AND CRUEL AND IGNORANT PEOPLE It dumbfounds me that ADULTS act that way.Good luck and God bless you, Dear heart.Elise Gunn

[@ashleylondroche3044]

💚💚 Thank you so much.

[@tashie1982]

I am sorry for your losses and I'm sorry that your husband had such a hard time dealing with this and I am sorry that he left you at a time you needed support the most :-(

[@brilliantbutblue]

Ashley never ever say "lm sorry" we are all so so sorry for what you have been through🤍🤍🤍🙏

[@ashleylondroche3044]

❤️ thank you