The Funeral Concert Where the Body Performed

[@lailinshale]

I love her phrasing, "this was a person, and they left a hole." I think that's all any of us are looking for, when we talk about how we honor our dead. My grandmother recently passed, and she was a quilter. She made a quilt for every marriage, a baby quilt for every new grandbaby. At her funeral, the church pews were all covered in her quilts. People brought them from home, some of them were ragged from being loved on for years. That was such a powerful image of her lie spent loving and giving to her family. It meant so much to me.

[@spiritmatter1553]

That’s beautiful, thanks for sharing. I can envision it.

[@jaspermartin7444]

well er... they filled that "hole" by putting a broomstick up his butt to prop him up... This is just the playtime of a psychopath who enjoys positioning dead bodies, and all the other psychopaths who want to play with a dead body.

[@kaithdvd]

Did your family cry? I'm already tearing up after reading this. Your grandma was obviously such a well-loved member and I wish her everlasting peace and happiness in her afterlife (if your family believes in it)

[@dansetteameliawilson3227]

Wow...that's amazing!

[@Mia-es1rp]

Aww thats amazing. I just lost my grandmother , her funeral was last week she was 91 . She made everyone afagans and quilts too.Before any grand babies were born they had a blanket.Im still crying through out the day , My mother is having panic attacks and my 15yr old has been sad and lost some weight. Her passing has been so hard on everyone. Hope your family is well.

[@pisces3121]

I"m a 5th generation embalmer. Having the body at the club is no less sanitary than at a church or funeral with the casket open.

[@dsimon33871]

Yeah... I was kind of wondering about that point when a big deal was made about it lol.

[@dawnmidnightsun2521]

@@dsimon33871 Caitlin has gone over it a bunch of times on the channel already. So she was more focused on the other aspects.

[@morganmore6]

And yet it still gross and I been thought all my life dead body should not be in church it's is dead what comes decop

[@janeysiegrist5061]

I'd like to be composted, so I can't be embalmed or have a fancy party with me as the guest of honor, but I have all the love for how his family honored him..I think there was a show about these kinds of funerals at one point..I'll Google it after I finish this video 😆

[@dsimon33871]

@@morganmore6 your always going to get a plurality of views in a pluralistic culture. I tend to feel like you do lol... I don't want any association with a dead body when I am gone.

[@marilynmiller5605]

This story reminded me of something that happened 24 years ago. my son, Jon, died suddenly and unexpectedly. I lived in Hawai’i and Jon lived in California. As soon as I could get to CA I told the funeral director that I needed to sit with my son for a short while before his cremation. Upon hearing me say this my Mother began pleading with me ( she even tried bribing me!) to not see Jon. I knew I needed to sit with him- after all I was there when he was born… even the funeral director told me that his injuries would make it impossible for me to see him! I told him to put Jon on a stainless steel table and throw a sheet or blanket over him. I just NEEDED TO SIT WITH MY CHILD! I did it. I sat with my first- born and shared space with him! And I am SO Glad I did. There would never be another chance! For the love of Pete- let people do what they need to do!!!

[@thayerwilliams905]

I understand this. Mines only a toddler right now but if he goes before I do, I cannot imagine a world or circumstance in which I don't have one more chance to be alone with him. I'm so sorry for your loss, and so happy you persevered and got what you needed.

[@BlondieG63]

I’m so sorry for your tremendous loss. I too lost my son. He died in a car accident the day before his 16th birthday. He was buried in his favorite jersey, along with his cellphone in his hand. His friends put mementos around him and I had his girlfriend stand with me in the receiving line. I also put her in his obituary. On a table off to the side, we had fun pictures of family and friends with him and we left blank pages for his friends to write their messages. My only complaint was that the funeral director appeared to not want me to touch my child. I only wanted to touch his cheek for the last time. He would be 33 years old. I don’t find anything wrong with having the type of services that reflect the individual who has passed. Personally, I feel no bias, neither good nor bad, toward any person or their family, regarding the style in which they celebrate their loved ones life and mourn their loss.

[@marilynmiller5605]

@@OctoBear88 my son was shot in the head. Most of face was gone…. The funeral home wrapped his entire head in gauze… mummy-like. It was fine.

[@marilynmiller5605]

@@OctoBear88 he was shot in the head. Most of his face was missing. They wrapped his head (mummy like). It was perfect in a very weird way, but OK .

[@DagmarDollmaier]

Really beautiful. My mom had a similar experience with my baby brother. She could NOT have seen him but she needed to. Everyone grieves in their own way.

[@carlaroberts8979]

I'm a grieving mother I had to look at my babygirl in a casket on her 20th birthday. I absolutely love this young kings send off. Please please please let his mother grieve in peace. It was absolutely perfect. The energy in that place was probably off the charts and his mama felt it and I hope it in some way helps her carry this unbearable pain a little easier.

[@SewardWriter]

(HUG) May your daughter's memory be a blessing. 💖

[@myishacherry7242]

😢❤🙏💔

[@laprincesadelacocina]

Plus his mom knew her son didn't want a traditional funeral and her respecting her sons wishes was sweet

[@NKdidit.24]

He wasn't a king. He was a rapper with a criminal record as long as my leg

[@Jellybeansatdusk]

also his mother’s sentiment of “you’re not gonna look down on my son” really touched me

[@FilosophicalPharmer]

Not gonna look down on him literally or figuratively! Yes, I loved that too.

[@retard_activated]

She's a strong woman... I can't fathom what losing a child is like, but I think she's a real badass for setting up her son's home going this way. Unique, fitting and very powerful. I'd like to think he'd be really proud of this and her. 💖

[@Jellybeansatdusk]

Definitely! To me it proves that a funeral or celebration of life or whatever you want to call it is the most respectful when it’s done in a way that honors the person’s CHOICES. So people who don’t know him looking on and calling it disrespectful or wrong aren’t actually taking into consideration his skills and interests and more importantly the choices he made. If it’s going to be a celebration of his life, make it personal to him. It’s a great sentiment.

[@byproductofcheese]

I mean he's in the ground now yes?

[@Jellybeansatdusk]

@@byproductofcheese not necessarily. Most people get cremated, so his remains could be anywhere, and depending on her spiritual beliefs his soul could also be somewhere else. The point she is making is that he deserves the same love and respect he brought into their lives, so they gave him a funeral to respect his personality and the choices and things he worked hard for in his life.

[@claireeebee]

You know, just because something isn't for me doesn't mean I can't appreciate it's for someone else. This family doesn't deserve the harassment. RIP to Goonew and condolences to his family and friends. They know what they wanted to do to celebrate his life and I'm all for it! It was perfect!

[@teijaflink2226]

Disgusting people where harassing a grieving family, even if this might not be for you they obviously loved him and just did what he would have wanted. People should be more enranged that a talanted, young man was robbed and murdered than harash his family.

[@claireeebee]

@@teijaflink2226 It's wild to me how hateful people were to the family. This was a perfect celebration of his life.

[@allenorganist2011]

I totally agree Claire Bee, this isn’t for me or anyone in my family, but I believe the family should be able to grieve anyway that is going to help them heal. Condolences to his family and friends.

[@amberlinmchugh8115]

Agreed, if everyone there was cool with it who the eff cares

[@claireeebee]

@@allenorganist2011 Exactly! I don't know anyone that would want to do this (maybe my dad lol. He's a character) but I think it can be the right thing for other people and help them heal/celebrate the life of someone they love. It's weird some people are so bothered about stuff that isn't their business.

[@kimjoshuadano3580]

When my friend, who was a teacher and a cheer dancer during his college years, died, his funeral service included a cheer dance routine by his former members, an almost stand up comedy show, and many other pumped up performances. Although there is still an opportunity to mourn and pay a silent tribute, I guess it was the most unique but the realest paying of respect to the dead I have witnessed.

[@jaspermartin7444]

there's a huge distinction between any kind of performative show you want to have at the funeral parlor; and dragging a corpse all around town, shoving a broomstick up his butt to prop him up, dressing him up, then playing with his dead body to pose him. Of course people were walking up to him, putting his arm around their shoulders then taking selfies. Of course they would, what else would you expect at a freak show like that? This is literally the most disgusting thing I have heard in a looooong while, I am totally entitled to feel this way and I am totally entitled to express contempt to any lowlife scum who thinks this is "beautiful". YUCK.

[@uyagraph]

@@jaspermartin7444 "i am totally entitled to call you a bunch of names while also disrespecting your opinion" that's what i get from your comment. Yes you are entitled to your feelings about this but that's it. This doesn't hurt anyone, and you seem to have a very sad life.

[@electrictroy2010]

THE ENTITLEMENT GENERATION in a nutshell. They don’t understand the concept of freedom (letting people live their lives as they choose)

[@tammybagwell1741]

But was his body propped up on display???? Probably not because that is what is considered by most to be disrespectful here and seems to scream of "me me me I want attention too" by the family

[@tamarrajames3590]

@@tammybagwell1741 This was much like a typical Irish Wake from an earlier time in our history. The dead was the guest of honour at a party (often in their local pub), where the body was seated in a chair, and people told stories of times they shared with the departed. Sometimes they bought a drink for their friend, or paid back a debt, or just said goodbye, forgiving unkept promises. We didn’t used to be so distanced from death and the dead, it was an accepted part of life. I’m sorry you can’t see the beauty in how this family chose to say goodbye, it isn’t what I would want (I prefer to be composted and given back to the land), but it hurt no one.🖤🇨🇦

[@marcywaldenville862]

My beloved husband, Kenny, died in 2017. It was sudden and completely unexpected. But I knew he hated funerals. So, we opted for cremation and a picnic celebration in his honor. He had attended my cousins life party years earlier and said that was what he wanted. Hundreds of our friends came, we ate, laughed, talked, and remembered. It was so perfectly Kenny. Thank you for normalizing grief and speaking out for what the family needs. ❤

[@missmissy5170]

Very respectful

[@nrsrchd]

I went to a funeral where the dead man had already presung the songs for his funeral. He had an awesome voice and the moment the first note was sung the whole church was crying and sobbing joy to hear his voice again.

[@robertagilbert12345]

@Nrsrchd I also went to our Pastors funeral and he to had already recorded himself singing the songs he wanted played. It was so sweet to still hear his voice even though he was gone. And yea everyone was in tears 😭. It was a beautiful funeral. Hope you have a blessed day. 🙏💕🙏💕🙏

[@Amandavg]

I absolutely love this idea. I’m only 26 so I don’t plan on going anywhere soon, but as a singer myself I think I’ll do this for my celebration of life!

[@dianeaishamonday9125]

​@@Amandavg yes!! 🌹🌹

[@Jenn-ie5vf]

That makes sense. Charging admission to the funeral of a life taken way too soon seems inappropriate to me however

[@jenelaina5665]

@@Jenn-ie5vf so let's just go back to that Video For Another Time about the cost of such a process. If they had the funeral in a church he never went to, how many of his mourners would've felt obligated to drop $ on church funeral appropriate clothes because they didn't have any? Or flowers because that's what you do? I doubt any kin blood or bond the family knew would've been turned away if they didn't have $40. In any case, the whole point of this video and the Mom's message was... Don't like it, you don't have to talk about it.

[@heathermason9311]

When the world needed her the most…she returned. Always a great day when Caitlin post!

[@johnpatterson4816]

I guess they never heard the 1990 country song "Prop Me Up Beside The Jukebox When I Die".

[@rainblaze.]

Funerals are for the sake, and what works for the living, not the dead. They are no longer there, there.

[@kelvinriach4573]

She always puts a smile on my face welcome back C xxx

[@janetflier6192]

Thanks for coming back, Caitlin!! Great info!

[@angelaneethling7008]

Amen to that

[@angelsinthewindow]

I fully love the idea of the middle finger to the killers saying that he was going to be celebrated and loved even in death while they will be nothing still. Because that is completely true. I'm so sure he was smiling watching all his family and friends having a blast at his celebration. His mother is a very beautiful and caring person to want to have his ideal funeral and not care what others would want. Much love to her and support.

[@kaweenis]

it makes me sad that so many people felt the need to judge a memorial for someone they didnt even know. i hope the mother got the support she deserved

[@angelsinthewindow]

@@StrokerAce78 Excuse me, but I believe you are the one who is very close minded if you think that there is no way someone isn't able to be able to go to heaven just because of a earthly label like 'gangster'. If his heart was good and he at least tried to do good by the people around him, then I believe that their is still a opening within those clouds for him. Something tells me you don't know him, you only see the word gangster or that he is black with tattoos on his face and you think he is a bad person but not everyone who looks like that or has that label is a bad person. Even then, who are we to say good and bad when there are shades of gray in the world? Nothing is ever cut and dry. Edit: Also had to rewatch the video to see but I didn't see at any point they called him a Gangster. He is a rapper, not a gangster. a Musician who does a certain type of music. Not sure where you got Gangster from now.

[@judithgrace9850]

You kill the bodies but the souls are released and will haunt you forever

[@aprilMichelleXJRL]

Yea I was thinking this to. He's also from my city so I represent to the fullest. I think it was different, I'd had never thought of this, but dang it looks really cool.

[@barbarabarnes-coleman1446]

When it's your own money then you can celebrate a FUNERAL the way 💯 you see fit and it's not to please the world but you know what life lived of your loved one

[@smontone]

“You’re not going to look down on my son” I got full body chills.

[@lisaerl]

Oh please. Was the killer.caught and where is he/she now? Hopefully, 10 feet under. What was this killing about? Drugs or what? Why are so many young black rappers killed by other blacks? Is it due to drugs or competition, why? I've been noticing that more and more seem to be losing their lives.

[@anekababy2720]

​@@lisaerlhate nobody want to see u happy rich eating

[@MsAchampion]

​@@lisaerlHe got kicked because he was actually being robbed. 😢

[@enriqueromero8376]

Bro ur corny asf 😭😭😂😂 wat are we 12 nobody “looks down” on anyone at their funeral

[@Nikki_with_the_blikki]

I agree! That was such a powerful statement! And goes to show how much she loves her baby and wanted to send him off with the highest regards 🥹

[@AntheaRutherford]

In 1992, a writer I knew died, and I attended his pre-cremation wake at the Neptune Society's neo-Classical San Francisco columbarium, along with hundreds of others. The body was embalmed and in a casket, but rather than the middle of the floor, it was propped to almost upright in a corner where people could have a more private moment if they wished. He was well known for 'holding court', whether at his home or when he attended conventions. He was always happy to talk with fans at length and was a sort of father figure to many. He'd be sitting in the most comfortable chair, his long legs crossed, invariably with a drink in one hand and gesturing with a cigarette in the other. When I and a few others went to pay our respects after all the remembrances, the thing we all agreed on was that he didn't look right without a glass of whisky and a smoke. So someone provided the drink, and I provided the cigarette. It was an act of love, not disrespect: we were remembering the man we knew and loved, and making it seem more as if he were with us.

[@meandkitty8387]

"You're not gonna look down on my son" that's all we need to hear as outsiders, it's powerful and moving enough. I'm glad they got to have this and I hope people leave them alone soon

[@bevsims1982]

A true mamma bear. The strength she had to give him the send off fitting of him is wonderful and all I saw was someone who was loved. Rest Peaceful Goonew.

[@eliotdaoust3765]

My eyes waterd real bad when i heard the sentence!!! It was so power full! She knew what he wanted!

[@HikinCatfish]

@@bevsims1982 yes! And the fact that they honored *his beliefs and life rather than something family may have wanted. That's ultimate respect and homage.

[@anaz5918]

As a long they were his death wishes I’m fine with it . It upsets me when people don’t honor peoples dead wishes.

[@fthurman]

May we all have someone in our lives, as well as our deaths, that respects, loves, and fights for us so much.

[@kyleenhurtado9570]

"Because we have such non-existent help for low income people in the death care system." This hit hard, but in the most grateful way! I lost my mom during COVID(not to COVID), but I had discovered this channel months before. Your mortuary took care of, cremated, and divided her ashes for my sister and myself without nickel and diming. Honestly, it was fate that I fell upon your channel months before she passed because I would have never found anyone that I'd be so comfortable with handling my mom. Thank you Caitlin for everything! 🖤 (And for reference, I'd love my kids to be able to keep whatever tattoos of mine they may want and then throw my remains into nature to decompose naturally and feed the Earth.)

[@urmamasmamasmama]

💜

[@natsinthebelfry]

I could tell it would probably be a very respectful and comforting experience, but I don't think I've seen someone talk about actually using Caitlin's mortuary services in all the years I've been watching her videos. My family is potentially moving somewhere very close to her practice and it's possible that we'll need her services someday, so I really appreciate your comment. I hope your family is doing well!

[@kes9612]

@Nix Ward I was thinking the exact same!!! I'm nowhere near her area and probably never will be but out of all the years I've been watching her (since her early days) I have yet to see a comment where the poster spoke on doing business with her funeral home (no doubt their are probably thousands but in the grand scheme of YT they can be downright impossible to view unless you scroll through 1k comments). I was delighted to see feedback on her services and if me or mine are ever in the area and in need, I can honestly say her funeral home would be my first call. I'm actually a bit jelly that my state (let alone locally) doesn't have many funeral homes or directors with the "options" that Caitlin offers. She has inspired me to think outside the box, plan ahead and actually research while I'm still here to make sure the me and mine have "the good death" experience in life!

[@myswanktrendz]

Her blunt reply was so true. Funerals can wipe out a family with little cash, and they may get talked into paying on credit for years, etc. Sad and frustrating.

[@jamesbrown-wt1cc]

You're a hard core naturalist Kyleen✊✊✊✊

[@danielleschiazza6172]

There is a 2 year old girl in italy named rosalia lombardo who died from pneumonia and ger parents were so grief stricken that they took her to a local embalmer who prepared her body so incredibly well that she is still on display in a glass coffin today over 100 years later! She looks like she is just a sleeping little 2 year old. She is kept in the catacombs in palermo sicily. My family in sicily have gone to visit her, she is like the daughter of sicily, everyone loves her. Trust me! Losing a loved one, especially a child, is so devastating that u will do some extreme things to memorialize ir hold on to them.

[@mangalover0149]

I've seen pictures of it. She just looks like she's sleeping. I think Caitlin has mentioned her in some of her older videos.

[@PoundCakeDiva]

It amazes me how people feel so entitled to tell other people how to grieve THEIR loved ones. Please go have several seats and hope when it’s your time somebody loves you enough to grieve and miss you.

[@natisharoberts6505]

💯💯💯

[@Chrissy85308]

When my son was murdered we had him dressed in his favorite skateboarding pants, shirt and shoes. We had people stick skateboard stickiers on his coffin and had them write personal messages on it. He looked like he was in a big funky skateboard. We played one of his favorite songs. It was him through and through. I pray for this man's family. They did what he would have wanted them to do. Good for them.

[@zolau7702]

Sorry for your loss. 🙏🏼

[@Suga29838]

My condolences to you and your family ❤️

[@ms.mystique4388]

Sorry for your loss.💛 I also applaud you & your family for giving your baby the send off he deserved & was all about him. 💛💛💛

[@Chrissy85308]

@@zolau7702 Thank you so much.

[@Chrissy85308]

@@Suga29838 Thank you so much.

[@wjbluv]

This is like a song I grew up with, “Prop me up beside the Jukebox if I die.” I liked that she took her son’s life into account on how to send him away. I’m an atheist but my family would have a religious ceremony against my wishes. It was respectful for him and to him and that’s the important thing.

[@thepalettewhispererasmr1227]

A nurse i work with started singing this with a drunk patient recently lol

[@kesakary]

I started singing this song when the artist , Joe Diffie died. Bless his sole.

[@CoasterMan13Official]

I wouldn't mind my family celebrating my life in the form of a traditional funeral. Just don't sing gospel music and don't be talking about God. What they did for him was just disrespectful of a corpse.

[@OpenKeith]

@@CoasterMan13Official Disrespectful according to whom? You're entitled to your own opinion, but don't act like you know what Goonew would have considered disrespectful better than *his own family*; your opinions and cultural differences are not the only ones that have a right to exist.

[@shannonEGBOK]

That makes me think of "roll me up and smoke me when I die" lol

[@kevinkelley3657]

I wise man once said "there is no wrong way to do a wedding, or a funeral". I agree with this statement with my whole heart. If the family liked what they did, I love it. May he rest in peace.

[@flameepidemic4839]

I semi disagree with the wedding because technically it is a religious thing. Decorate and do how you want and wherever but you still need a preacher and to mean it when you say your vows 😊

[@craigjenkins5434]

​@@flameepidemic4839Ok, but if people want to veer from the "tradition" of a huge, expensive party and a white dress and the family giving one spouse away, a little white church, etc, they should absolutely be allowed to do that. Unfortunately, often people who are not getting married think they have the right to involve themselves in the planning of an event that has nothing to do with them. The government does have guidelines you must hit, other than that, I say do whatever you'd like to do.

[@Nikki_with_the_blikki]

​​​​@@flameepidemic4839not all weddings are religious. My husband and I are atheists and my mom married us (she's not a preacher. You can actually apply online to be certified in officiating weddings, in NJ at least). There was no mention of God in our vows, just promises to love each other forever🤷🏾‍♀ ️

[@FIRING_BLIND]

I only disagree in certain circumstances, like if their identity is erased in the process. Plenty of trans ppl have their family dress them in their assigned gender when they die because their family never actually accepted them for who they are-they do this against the dead persons wishes

[@knifefght]

​@@flameepidemic4839no??? Legally a wedding is an acknowledgement of a relationship by the state. Any religious aspects are a personal add-on

[@_fiberjunkie]

He's not the first corpse in a night club, and he won't be the last. My condolences to the family, and good for them to honor him how they saw fit. 💕

[@MD-cu6tx]

👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@AK-fr5zv]

You know, as a recovering addict, this hits different. Or maybe exactly as you'd meant.

[@_fiberjunkie]

@@AK-fr5zv Recovery can be a long and lonely road. I haven't been in a nightclub in over a decade. Stay strong. 💕

[@MD-cu6tx]

@@AK-fr5zv you're not the first addict you won't be the last let that hit different 🧐🍻🥃

[@AK-fr5zv]

@@MD-cu6tx I'm more than aware...

[@tiffanyholman4028]

In my grief and widows humor, and to my mother's horror, I asked the funeral director if we could take my husband around like Weekend at Bernie's. To my absolute SHOCK, he said that in Arizona as long as they're embalmed and accompanied by a licensed funeral director we totally could!! It would be almost $75,000 though. I chose cremation. My mom got me a good therapist.

[@neecie9075]

Love the fact that this is legal in Arizona. I would love to be "sent" off in a similar fashion. I see nothing wrong with what this family did. It's their choice. Period. If they find it respectful, I find it respectful. Who am I to judge. Sending love & condolences to his family and friends.

[@elizabethwilliams6612]

I share your type of humor. I know it can be a bit much for most people, but I got a good giggle.

[@linerasmussen4788]

I just have to say I love your thinking but at a price but this is legit something I would NEVER have thought. My condolences to you and his family

[@neecie9075]

I agree. Your humor is much appreciated. How'd that therapist work out? In all seriousness, sorry for your loss.

[@lindadepew7652]

🤣🤣🤣

[@robindreweslaino9385]

When my dad died the eulogy given by my brothers was more of a comedy routine. They told stories of the things we had done while dad was alive. It was amusing to watch the expression on the attendees. Some thought it was disrespectful but obviously they didn’t know dad that well. This was a celebration of dad’s life. He was a funny man and loved to laugh. My funeral will include handouts of Jim Beam and having one hit wonders playing in the background

[@myparceltape1169]

A beautifully forceful woman died. A simple, loving description was spoken to explain her sensitively. There was no awkward tension among the congregation. Instead there was laughter. It might have been something that they all suspected but were afraid to admit. Copies of the script were asked for by a few people who said they had not heard everything properly. Having said that, I still think everything is done for the living and not the dead.

[@noname-jh3bd]

That's great that you did that for your dad... and on an additional lighter note, one of my friends played the song Purple People Eater at her mom's funeral.. her mom absolutely loved that song

[@rocksiirose4536]

That sounds really 😎 cool

[@dwaynetrainer2901]

Race is such a sensitive topic as we all know. The way you covered this story was very respectful to Goonew and his family. I applaud you for how you covered this story. I learned a lot. Salute to you. RIP Goonew

[@wednesdayaddams7066]

You can't say ANYTHING nowadays without offending someone. As a woman of color myself, I'm SOOOOOO sick of this race card being pulled for EVERYTHING. It needs to stop.

[@Beaneabean]

Wait, what does race have ti do with this story?

[@daniellevera3020]

@@Beaneabeandid you watch the video?

[@Beaneabean]

@@daniellevera3020 No but I know about the funeral outside of this video

[@theon3pieceisreal]

@@wednesdayaddams7066 you're a woman of color but fail to realize that almost EVERYTHING is connected to race in some way.

[@solgato5186]

Aren't wakes with bodies done normally in various cultures? When we buried my kitty, my friend had me spend time placing wildflowers in the box with him, and that time saying goodbye, slowly surrounding him with flowers with the wind in the line of trees nearby, I think made the difference between me having a breakdown from the grief or not. It's the first time I've ever handled death close to me sanely and I got to grow up a little bit and accept the mortality of love a little more than I had before.

[@melissashiels7838]

I, too, recently waked my kitty before burying her. Laid her out in the sitting room overnight, covered her in a shirt of mine, placed her toys and snacks around her, and buried her with them. I totally get why people need the time post- death, with the body. I talked to her while my husband dug the grave (crap, now I'm crying again). It would have been even more awful without that time with her, to say goodbye.

[@janedoex1398]

It's totally safe if the passed one didn't die from a easily transmitted disease and very close contact with blood/ bodily fluids. Like it happened in one of the first Ebola outbreaks - where the family would wash the body complete, clothed them etc and so of course came in contact with all the blood leaking from the dead relative and all the ones other bodily fluids without any protection, because they didn't know how it was transmitted or that in this case it sadly was not safe to follow their practises. And so more people got sick, died and so on. It took the doctors a bit to figure it out when it first occured and in addition people didn't want to follow the restrictions of burning their loved ones and some secretly held on to " like it was always done". But except from some specific circumstances, it's totally safe to touch a dead body.

[@sonja_jade]

When my dog needed to be put to rest, he was so big that we couldn't fit him in our car to take him to a vet, so we called someone to euthanize him at home. He was a huge mastiff, and I laid in the floor behind him, cuddling him while the vet (who did not rush things at all, thankfully) prepped him for the shots. I felt him relax and go into that deep sleep, snoring and everything, drooling on my arm that he used as a pillow, and I felt when he sighed his last. Of course I was overcome with tears, but I knew he didn't leave stressed out and in an unfamiliar place. He was surrounded by family and love, the rest of our pets, and when it came time to remove his body, we all helped get him onto a stretcher and load him into the vet's van. The whole process was death in a way I'd never experienced before. I felt at peace knowing he was sent so gently to rest. It's that pause where you care for something you love even after they're no longer living. It kept me from falling into a deep grief. The process of caring for the body afterward was a bond I'll always cherish. If having this young man sent home in this way gives his family and friends that kind of peace then I see NOTHING wrong with it.

[@nunpho]

What a beautiful thread of comments, it definitely made me tear up. Our pets truly deserve this honour too and by doing these things it also helps us grieve in the healthiest way. 💓

[@jeffjousnaus3529]

we catholics bring thr body home for a week or so deping on thr sevice

[@bethroesch2156]

I may not make the same choices but I applaud his Mom for staying true to her child. Funerals, homecomings, whatever you believe, it's a personal choice and all families are different. She feels like she honored her child and stayed true to who he was, she deserves to be left to grieve in her own way and time. No mother should have to bury her child to begin with. No one has the right to tell her how to do that.

[@Condesamontes]

I’m a funeral industry manager, I always tell my families that it’s their day, their grief and they must grieve in their own way. If Mom is good with it, I’m not saying anything. 💙

[@HauntedDocumentaries]

Funerals are so important for the living. It truly allows the family to not just move on, but to truly understand the new timeline. It's a sad but beautful process, it's hard to explain.

[@jayonkfire8541]

Faccz

[@dovie2blue]

Is there anything that you couldn't do with an embalmed body? Are there any limitations to this type of extreme embalming?

[@Condesamontes]

@@dovie2blue we have never had a family ask for this, we have had families ask to embalm them so well that they will still look good 10 days out. We are in a tourist state, accidents happen here and often times we care for the decedents and the funeral home in their home state picks them up. Many times reconstructive prep is needed. We do whatever we can so the family can view their loved ones, we treat each person as if it’s our own family.

[@mr.alldaaay2791]

April 20th 77, We're transformers of Our lifetime. Gracias Amiga 🙌🏽

[@jfew1847]

Too many people are so afraid of death and all it entails, and that's sad. I'm Native. I believe in honoring those who pass. This was an amazing way to honor their loved one, to be able to say good bye their way.

[@vaginettamcsnapper]

Scientifically speaking, death is just the absence of life. It's no great mystery. It means that a body will no longer function, a brain will no longer think, a heart will no longer beat, and cells and tissue will begin to break down and decay. Death comes for everyone, so there's no point spending an entire lifetime fearing it - especially if there are no do-overs and the life we're living now turns out to be the only life we get. I personally would prefer not to die any time soon - and I certainly don't want to die a slow, painful death - but there are a lot of things I fear more than dying. For a lot of people - myself included - the scariest thing is not knowing what comes after death - or if there even is an "after". Is there really such thing as an essence - or a "soul"? If souls don't exist, then that means every person's consciousness will disappear forever and they will cease to exist after taking a final breath. It means we'll all just return to the same state of nothingness we were in for countless eons before we were born. But if we do have souls, what becomes of them? Where do they go when they are no longer tethered to a living body? Is there a creator of the universe? If so, will I get to meet them? Will they provide the answers to every existential question I ever had? Is this creator kind and benevolent? Or is it a petty, vengeful, bloodthirsty asshole like the creator that the believers of the Abrahamic religions worship? I have so many questions, but knowing the answers is just as scary and overwhelming as not knowing them!

[@swbigfan1]

I can't help but think that the thing distribution people is the lack of a barrier. In a tableau, in a glass casket, in a coffin, or wherever - you are separated from the body, you are just watching, you are safe. The people at his home going were interacting with the dead, they weren't just "spectators" viewing a body, they were right there with him to see him off and show his family that they cared for him. Also, I've gotta love the guy who pointed out this was a giant FU to the person who killed him.

[@sandraweiss4412]

I had to unpack why this made me uncomfortable, and to me I think it was about the intentions behind the funeral plan. I think Goonew's family did the right thing and honored his memory and life, but this seems different to me than Billy Standley (buried on his motorcycle). Billy planned his funeral to be a show, and planned his own honoring where Goonew wasn't able to do that, his life was ripped away from him and that makes me question if his final show is something he would of wanted for himself. BUT I'm not his family, I didn't know him and I believe the family did everything in their power to make the night something that he would of been proud of. I just hope the family is able to grieve with all of this attention brought on them.

[@swbigfan1]

@@sandraweiss4412 I agree that it's have been better if he was able to plan his own service. However being a young man that wasn't likely something he thought about, and our culture in America has so commercialized and confused the issue of death traditions that most families can either fall back on the commercialized tradition or do their best to guess what their family member would have wanted need on their life. It sounds like they did their best so more power to them. In many ways tends like this make me envy many of the other cultures around the world that have much more invested and connected death traditions. BTW, if you've never read Caitlin's books I recommend them - especially "From Here to Eternity" (which is like a 5.5 hour video if you get it on audible as she reads it herself) where she talks about going around the world and experiencing the varied ways that people treat their dead.

[@LotusesGalaxyOcean]

Lack of barrier is probably a big part. With that lack there is an implied requirement to interact which is not comfortable for many people. Also, let's consider that although he was a rapper the family specifically took this to a night club. Night clubs are often unsavory, unsanitary and rude or unsafe places generically. If they had set this up in another music venue that was not a night club I think the public response would have been significantly different. Choosing a night club is rather tasteless because it lacks respect when celebrating his life and treats it as just another party. They could have chosen another venue with a stage and done basically the same things just bring a smoke machine and lights. They didn't do so. The lack of any clear sacred ritual or space present makes this uncomfortable because it feels like denigration.

[@swbigfan1]

@@LotusesGalaxyOcean What sort of alternate venue would you suggest? I can't think of another setting that would both have a stage and allow for the sort of interacting that most folks do at a funeral. Also, if that's the sort of venue he performed at wouldn't that be the place to honor his life? And who are we to tell his family they made the wrong choice? It might not feel right for you and your family, but this is about his family. You suggest they should have setup a sacred space, whereas the family mentioned not wanting to use a church as he didn't go to church. Now I realize that a sacred space doesn't have to involve a church, or a temple, or a mosque - but if they specifically called out the fact that he didn't go to church I don't think it's a stretch to say religion may not have played a large part in his life. So a sacred space may be right for you but if they decided it wasn't right for them then that's their choice. Would I honor my family in this way, no. But it's not about my family, or your family, it's about their family. It's about allowing them to express their grief in their own way.

[@ashleys6942]

It’s just another way to display a body at a funeral. Instead of laying down in repose, he’s standing onstage, in front of everyone, in glory. His body wasn’t disrespected or desecrated. It was honored and celebrated. I think it’s moving for the family to want to recreate his legacy with one last party. RIP Goonew👑

[@stevedeleon8775]

My Grandmother passed away in 1985...She wanted No Sadness..No Crying..Her funeral was a Mexican Fiesta with Live Mariachi Music..Dancing & Food..It was what she wanted NOT what the CATHOLIC CHURCH & Some family members wanted!!

[@sokawai5]

yeah I want my funeral to be like that xd with the hampster dance song playing & everyone getting lit, maann I'll be dancing in my casket with them😎

[@melissamartinez3593]

My sister is married to a Mexican guy and I’ve only attended funerals for his family .. they r a party !

[@Phoenix-mh5eo]

As a white American who had never heard of this kind of extreme embalming, I found Goonews funeral honestly enchanting. His mother's reasoning behind it, the fact that he got to perform one last time even after he died. I think it's really beautiful. I personally want a more natural burial or funeral, but I think this is really awesome. His fans got one last chance to see him even after he was taken from them with no warning. His family got to see him being respected instead of looked down on. I love it.

[@Chich8058]

My Caucasian friend went to a black funeral for the 1st time and she was shocked at the outburst of people crying. She said she’s never been to a funeral like this 😂. I said girl this is my norm. We do nothing quiet, I’m Puerto Rican.

[@e.t.2230]

European American*

[@oakmaiden2133]

Just American

[@danielleschiazza6172]

Embalming?? 😂 it's not an Embalming it's a going home or celebration of life service. Embalming is a procedure done for many deceased people regardless of how their viewing is done.

[@DanielAppleton-lr9eq]

@@Chich8058 Richard Pryor did a thing about African - American & Caucasian funerals. It was funny yet VERY ENLIGHTENING & instructive on a *TON* of levels.

[@Logitah]

"It's like having the last word" made me smirk. Showing the world that he will never leave entirely was the perfect way to send him off!

[@jefferyneedham1581]

I'm a disabled Marine from a small town in Michigan and I think what this family did was amazing and a beautiful celebration of a life that was ended too soon through a tragedy and I wish the family of this young man many blessings and I hope their final moments with their loved one brought happy memories in such a trying time. God bless you and anyone who is reading this.

[@croninn]

Thank you for the blessing Jeffery. And thank you for your service to your, our, Country

[@jefferyneedham1581]

Thank you I wasn't anyone special just a leather neck trying to do my best. God bless and thank you for your kindness.

[@croninn]

Jeffrey, you're a special man. You've earned it.

[@jefferyneedham1581]

Thank you again for your kindness and wishing you a beautiful Christmas

[@sharis6986]

I agree Jeffery.and I thank you also.i bet my michigan town is smaller than yours tho!!.... MESICK MI..the moral mushroom capital.lol

[@junobarbosa4179]

I lost my dad almost a year ago. He was many different things - an activist, a deeply caring and loving man who struggled through life and still left a positive impact behind. One of the things he loved doing the most was dressing up as Santa Claus and giving away donated gifts for children whose family couldn't afford to buy it for them. When the time came to lay him to rest, my family agreed we could never say our last goodbye to him in a suit and a traditional cerimony. Instead, in his viewing he was wearing a Santa Claus costume, and I made a playlist with our favorite songs that we listened together. It was a small and intimate cerimony that still comforts me to this day. My point is, I'm all for families coping with the grief of their loved ones in the way that feels right, and I have so much respect for Goonew's family for their decision in the way they honored their loved one's memory and legacy.

[@centerpiecefloralrachelw.8844]

I lost my dad too, july of last year. The way you chose to say goodbye to him brought tears to my eyes. And honestly, I’ll now think of this beautiful story of how you honored your father when I see a man dressed at Santa. Sending you so much love, losing yoir father isn’t easy.

[@Sssssssslf]

This is absolutely amazing I ❤️ that you dressed him in his Santa suit that’s awesome!🎅 beautiful tribute ❤️

[@dompbrown5293]

Amen and God Bless you and your family! Thank you for sharing such a heartbreakingly beautiful moment with us!🫶🏾🙏🏾🕊

[@helenide8085]

I am so sorry for your loss.

[@jenmarks6594]

So incredibly sweet that you chose to honor him in a way that was befitting for him. A giving man with a big heart. May he rest in the sweetest of peace.

[@jaseniaflores1111]

This is common in Puerto Rico, and his families explanation “you’re not going to look down on my son.” Was touching and heartfelt.

[@Divataster]

Fandango Diablo

[@DaytimeNightmare]

? That ahhh Get-toe and primitive...

[@RandomVidsforthought]

​@@DaytimeNightmare What a stupid reply

[@dawnjuliooo]

@@DaytimeNightmare your spelling is ghetto and cringe

[@danielleschiazza6172]

Not only Puerto Rico but plenty of other countries too. Also it is catching on here, although not much but it has been done here. They actually showed one that happened here in the US on this video. It was the black women playing cards at the table with her feather boa and sunglasses on and her glass of wine. It is kind of sweet how the family puts a lot of attention to detail into it u know? Like it is a moment taken straight out of the person's life. Either way it is the family's choice! Why do people get all worked up over things that do not concern them?? Mind the damn business that pays u! 😂😂

[@pommiebears]

My nephew was recently found dead in his home. He was young, and autopsy results show undetermined. He just….died. No embalming, no church, his mother buried him under the most beautiful trees. Having him standing at his funeral would not be our way of saying goodbye, but people need to grieve and say goodbye in their OWN ways.

[@daveo8259]

I seen one tonight where the guy was buried, while on his motorcycle,in a plexi-glass coffin.

[@YoungDymisty]

@@daveo8259 so the one in the video 😂.

[@fthurman]

@@daveo8259 it's literally in the video you clearly didn't watch.

[@ae1586]

Was he vaccinated?

[@KrisD007]

@@ae1586 he had plexiglass, didn’t need it

[@charliefrid4559]

I feel so sorry that not only have the family had to deal with him dying at such a young age and in such an abrupt way, but, on top of that, the backlash from people that just do not know when to keep their opinions to themselves. Id like to just put out my deepest condolences to them, and I hope they are able to continue to celebrate his life in any way they find comfort. 🖤💜🖤

[@haileys5224]

7:00 yes she said exactly what I was thinking. How can somebody lack the compassion to criticize the way people respond and deal with their grief? If They aren’t harming other people they aren’t harming themselves, let them grieve!

[@johnpatterson4816]

If I could I'd like for my corpse sent home by Train. When Bush the Elder died the Union Pacific had a special train to carry his body from Houston to College Station where he was buried on the TexasA&M campus.

[@jill7717]

And then to think about that so many people don’t even talk to there family about what kind of funeral they want?

[@MitchellBay]

I don’t know how I stumbled upon this video but I just want to say that seeing all of these positive comments about Goonew are super comforting even just as a fan. Listened to his music for years and always felt he was very influential and underrated as a rapper, and thought the celebration of life was really cool but seeing all the hate and criticism made me sad for his family and just sad in general. Seeing a space where so many people from so many different backgrounds are saying positive things about it is so awesome. Cheers.

[@1onelyone]

This was a stellar posting of a family unapologetically having a memorial service like the young man lived, and you handled it with sensitivity and grace Caitlin..BRAVO! 👏👏

[@turkicnomad5632]

On first glance, knowing that he died suddenly, my immediate revulsion came from the fear that he did not necessarily want this and never had a choice. And also my general distaste for embalming having grown up in a Muslim middle eastern household. But knowing the love and care that went into this assuages all of my concerns. I’m happy that he was loved so dearly and respected by his family so deeply. Even though I don’t think we will definitively know that this is exactly what he wanted, I think the intention of his community and the comfort it brought to them is worth it.

[@emilyberry1985]

One of my favorite stories is about a woman who had terminal cancer, and she decided to end her life on her own terms, with the help of a doctor and medication. On the day she decided to go, her family got together, and had a celebration of life with her, and she died later that night. I remember hearing people criticize how it’s morbid to throw a death party for yourself 🙄. This man’s family clearly loves him, and this event is possibly one of the coolest celebrations of life I’ve ever seen. I think he would have loved his last performance.

[@myswanktrendz]

I am all for this approach to the end. I have a feeling it happens more often than we know especially when dealing with a terminal illness. Why waste away slowly. Have a party, and say goodbye. Leave everyone with a heartfelt personal goodbye.

[@racheldavis531]

Oprah did a similar thing recently for her father. There was big celebration right before he died

[@butterbeanqueen8148]

I’m a white person and I found this funeral very beautiful. It was a celebration of his life. How he lived and how his family wanted him to be remembered. I hope that people come to support and embrace different types of funerals. ❤

[@SolSkinn]

I'm 2 minutes in and I already feel like it's just none of my business how grieving families conduct a funeral. As long as it isn't hurting anyone.

[@lazyhomebody1356]

I think we have a right to have an opinion, but I don't understand why so many people feel the family needs to hear it!

[@junglekutz5625]

Right! Folk that don't have real business of their own usually be the only ones pressed to get all up in other peoples lives and decisions. I don't even get where such interests come from. The minute I ex out the video, I scratch whatever I've heard.

[@Pandagurl218]

Thank goodness most are naïve to world tradition and have no idea of the Toraja tribe and their cultural practices of the dead 😏 I agree people should just mind their own business. I hope his family heals from that tragedy

[@hpierce21]

If that's his final wish, everyone's opinion is irrelevant.

[@registrard1076]

Amen to that I never understood the picture taking of the person that passed but who am I to say that’s wrong?

[@adiel7618]

Funerals are for the living. This is what his mom wanted and that's all that should matter. Sorry for their loss. Thank you for showing this side of it for those who don't seem to understand it.

[@HauntedDocumentaries]

I agree, I've been saying that forever. Most people dont realize that. Funerals are for the living.

[@VibeRite]

“Funerals are for the living.” You are exactly right!

[@mamamoon65]

Truth! The deaf no longer have a care in this world. Wtg Mom....s good bye to your son!

[@dovie2blue]

My stepmom didn't want a viewing but I wanted to say goodbye and her best friend told me that she was glad I asked for it. She was the one who took care of Mom and found her after she was dead, and the funeral home did an amazing job and Mom really looked like she could just sit up and walk away. And her friend was left with a better memory.

[@anonymousanonymous-tw3wm]

Nah, the patrons of the club should have had an option of rather they wanted to party with the deceased. And im from the DMV so stop

[@kimberlypatton205]

I salute the family for celebrating the life of their loved one in the way that made his life meaningful to him.. He was honored for his contribution to the world of music he loved.A funeral can mean whatever joy life meant to the deceased and the family. Rest in musical peace Goonew!

[@Irisarc1]

My husband had colon cancer , already stage 4 when it was first discovered. He valiantly fought the disease for 4 years, 2 more than expected. We were lucky enough to have a bit of time for Gil to decide what he wanted done with his remains. It turned out to be very fair and appropriate, satisfying both our friends and family near us and his family several states away. Gil wanted to be cremated, so we needed something to keep his ashes in. He was a lifelong lover of comicbooks and superheros; I mean frim back when it was definitely _not_ cool. We had quite a few items of memorabilia. My dad was also an avid Superman collector with an extensive collection. We picked out 2 items to use for Gil's ashes, a small metal Superman lunch box, which was actually the container a salt & pepper set, and a metal Superman cookie tin/musicbox. When he passed, we had some of his remains sealed into the mini lunchbox and the rest in the tin. I kept the smaller container at home, and took the larger tin to his family, where they had a lovely funeral with it as the centerpiece. They decided he should rest near his older sister who was killed years earlier in a car accident. They buried the tin near the head her gravestone, which they later had etched with his name and dates also. Back at home, we had a very nice memorial party with all our friends and my family - everyone here who loved Gil. We had a little bit of his remains there with us, but it was his memory that was important to us. Everybody who wanted to talked about their favorite memories of Gil. It was very informal, and just the kind of send-off he would have enjoyed had he been there.

[@Shan-lp2iu]

I come from England where it's basically cremation or casket. I think the different cultures ways of homouring their dead is beautiful. the tribes with their death chairs felt so moving to me. Goonew got a damn good send off and im really sorry to the family that they had to defend themselves. Full support and love to them. You did amazing for your boy

[@Ebrill_Owen]

Eugene’s story made me so angry and upset. At least it was Goonew’s wish to have a final party. Eugene was given no consideration at all after nobody claimed him. Being used for prank fodder without consent is absolutely disrespectful and disgusting. I’ve been loving the themes of your most recent videos, Caitlin! Been making me contemplate even more on mortality and the ethics of death.

[@myswanktrendz]

Eugene's.story upset me as well. I'm.sorry, but the lack of respect shown to this unknown black man's corpse screams racism as I can't imagine everyone would laugh at black students staging a white corpse in public.

[@harmonymoxham1719]

I totally agree. I was so upset hearing about Eugene. At least Goonew's funeral was what he would have wanted, and he was surrounded by people who loved him.

[@Ebrill_Owen]

@@harmonymoxham1719 that’s totally the vibe I got from Goonew’s wake, it was a party and a celebration and he was surrounded by love and light. Eugene on the other hand was treated like a toy by people who didn’t even care about him.

[@m.l.t.6568]

Who is Eugene? I feel like I've missed something... EDIT: Nevermind. Didn't watch the video far enough. 🤦‍♀️

[@adrianjanssens7116]

@@Ebrill_Owen He didn't benefit at all. He was dead. No feelings, no nothing. His body did not need to appear at the party Just a publicity stunt that even this channel covered. Creepy all around.

[@MAGICKALSHANTE888]

Initially I was taken aback. However as I’m learning more about life and in preparation for death one day I think this is amazing and everyone should certainly have the freedom to celebrate their loved ones how they want.❤

[@janiemaitland2076]

I remember seeing this when it was all over social media, obviously for a lot of us it was shocking! But when I read his story I understood it better. Such a tragic loss of life, and I love what his mom said, “you will not look down on my son.” Also that last photo with him smiling with his family made me tear up ❤️ I’m glad his family was able to celebrate his life the way they know he would want them to.

[@maritzacaruth9283]

I agree, that last photo reminded me of his mom saying that. He towered over everybody in that picture and he/they looked so happy❣

[@trudy-annsmall9600]

And the fact that they murdered him give her even more right to feel that way about not looking down on her son...she was letting his killers know also they cannot dim her son light even in death...thats just the way I see it and it's quiet fine her way.

[@freakygardener8033]

A funeral is SUPPOSED to be a celebration of ones life. He was a musician, and an entertainer, and although it was different than a "traditional" funeral, it sounds to me like it was exactly PERFECT for a celebration of this young man's life! If you don't like it, then move along, and let his loved ones and friends mourn in their own way! My respect to the family!!!

[@casselc9]

They used him as a meal ticket and nothing more they didn’t give a fuck about him

[@jbm_120]

I guess nowadays people accept this poor taste as acceptable and normal

[@i.l6916]

I like how people are defending this weird sht and expecting 99% of people not to call it out as weird 😂 get over it. People call out weird things. It’ll never change.

[@yungsavniyah4383]

@@jbm_120 it’s nun of your damn business ITS HIS BODY

[@danielflanard8274]

@@jbm_120 Normal, definitely not. Acceptable, sure why not. Nowadays isn't so different from the past, many people actually believe that their opinions matter in regards to how other folks live their lives.

[@soniadawson6876]

I'm from Baltimore and this is not that uncommon. We also have a funeral home with drive thru viewings. This only received a lot of attention because it was posted all over social media and he was a rapper. I love the idea personally. Celebrate the person the way they would want to be celebrated.

[@HikinCatfish]

Seriously! I'm really trying to figure out how this is any different than an old Irish wake?

[@soldiaz7261]

@@HikinCatfish its DIFFERENT because hes BLACK 😱 oh the HORROR of anyone with a skin tone darker than the irish displaying their dead

[@CatMomMarina]

This was such a beautiful concept! It's clear that his family truly knew him well and respected the work he did in life, this is why different de@th options should be more readily available!

[@breckbusha5291]

I don't care what anyone says, I found his family's way of honoring him beautiful. My family used to take the time to mourn our loved ones. It used to be 3 day's of stories and food and saying goodbye. Somewhere in the past 5 years that all changed. Now they skip the viewings/stories/food and it's just a race to get them in the ground and to the bar before happy hour ends. There's no celebration of a life lived. People deserve to be celebrated, they deserve to be remembered.

[@bupekabamba6017]

In Zambia, our funerals traditionally take three days of family and friends gathering and keeping vigil at the deceased home.

[@dreamdiva9200]

Exactly 💯 💯 💯

[@AuthorLHollingsworth]

👏👏👏👏👏👏👏💯💯💯💯💯

[@kachi2782]

Where are you from and what is your family's religious belief ?

[@JamaicanemeraldQueen]

Aretha Franklin's funeral was an epic celebration, she had a change of clothes and was viewed over multiple days. I dont see what was wrong here. Let the family send him how they see fit. There was a guy inTrinidad that was paraded and music blasting. There is a funeral home in ATL that has a drive through veiwing. Nothing wrong there either. They made us pause. That was so dam true.

[@heather8518]

I'd never heard of a drive thru viewing, but I like the idea!

[@jessegunn5529]

There many in Chicago

[@ms.mystique4388]

@@heather8518 they have em in L.A., Chicago…a lot of the funeral homes that do this implemented this type of viewing bc of funerals being shot up..sad but, having that option still gives ppl a way to pull through & pay their respects

[@ChimplaGoober]

Very different from a public setting like a night club rather than a more closed off viewings

[@LechLecha893]

It’s called “a casket”, and the viewing was in a funeral home- & no one charged for a viewing.

[@itsjosegurl]

As an artist and performer myself, I am so grateful and in awe of the way Goonew's family paid respect to him. This is so tremendously beautiful and such an amazing and deeply passionate and connected way to honor his lived experience in an authentic way.

[@bryncheeze8970]

I love how she was so respectful and admiring, and then immediately "Because it was a corpse at a nightclub!!!" A living ideal for "I don't understand, but I respect your right."

[@todorstojanov3100]

But she very clearly does understand, she provided a perfect explanation for it. She's simply sensible enough to be able to see it from both perspectives

[@shanameekafrank2545]

She spoke very diligently 💟 My Condolences to the family 🙏 SleepInPeace Goonew 🕊💙

[@TinyScorpion44]

This is honestly kinda like what my daughter wants! Being a death positive family, we've discussed options for our bodies and my 6 year old daughter hilariously requested "nothing." As in just let her lay on the floor dead in the middle of everything. Goonew was basically just dead in the middle of everything and that is pretty rad. He got to attend his final party and that's very cool. And really, it's none of anybody's business if they aren't family. I hope his family are able to enjoy his memory in peace

[@kenkaniff8428]

Lol. That's great and typical what your 6 year old said. I'm born and bred old fashoined English and my mother is born and bred Irish and (even when I was 5 or so) we have always been VERY open and practical about death also. It's a reality and it's going to hapoen. Why have any doubts of whether you're doing the right thing for that family member? Discuss is openly. It's not unheard of but its not so common among Americans tho

[@urmamasmamasmama]

@@kenkaniff8428 I tell my kids when I die don't waste money on anything special. get me cremated and put me in a coffee can. and don't cry over me being gone, share a laugh or two with each other.

[@yonna254]

That’s awesome you talk to your 6 yo it give me the idea to ask my 5yo. We’re very death positive as well and we talk about it all the time, but I never considered asking him. I feel he may be In the same boat as your daughter he likes attention!

[@kenkaniff8428]

@@yonna254 oh yea that could be a fun conversation. I bet he loves the camera as well. "From the mouths of babes"😂

[@camilapais2904]

"You're not going to look down at my son" broke me, I'm here crying over my coffee, lol

[@jazziebaby31688]

Me too, saddest situation ever😭

[@nunyanope4988]

The entrance fee is what bothered me.

[@ms.shemacooley3122]

Yea that was a deep comment, I felt that 💙

[@dreamkitty]

fake deep moment, everybody has to pass away. how you decide to dispose of the body doesn’t matter cause… well you’re already dead

[@montagne5825]

"lol" ? weirdo

[@revengefullobster4524]

when my wife died in June after a failed heart transplant, we had a celebration of life service at our house. no church or anything just a party in our backyard, admiring the garden, yard, and house that she worked hard to make her own. we laughed, drank and had a good time remembering her and the difference she made to so many people. 😢 definitely not traditional, but I'm sure she would have loved it.

[@glitteryfaery]

My condolences :( It sounds lovely though, I'd love for my loved ones to do the same for me

[@adrianwalden9788]

my condolences as well :( I haven't thought much on these types of things, but it sounds really beautiful, and full of meaning, I hope it helped the healing process a bit?

[@lisawhereisthecultjam]

Much love to you and your family. That sounds like a beautiful send off.

[@uyagraph]

That's wholesome! So sorry for your loss

[@catmomjewett]

My father was a pastor, did lots of funerals between 1947 and about 1988. He advised me not to go to his father’s bcs it’s too late to do anything meaningful. That was late 70s. He died in 2016. Made it clear he wanted no service. Donated his body to EVMS, came back ashes. My mother had a service. I didn’t go. He was unaware of the movement away from 20th C death responses. But, he obviously had a heart toward these developments that so excite me. I am REALLY enjoying you, my girl. 💛

[@happyzombiikitti]

I really resonated with the thought expressed by Caitlin and Dr.Fletcher “Goonew made us pause” My indigenous culture in Mexico has a whole holiday known as “day of the dead” in fact, we decorate our home with colorful fake skulls surrounded by flowers and adorn in huichol or embroidery. We keep these things in our home and home altars residing beside our relatives and loved ones pictures everyday as a reminder of how thin the veil between life and death truly is. We recognize death is all around us, and honor it and our loved ones spirit and memories/legacies once they are gone on day of the dead. White supremacy is not allowing indigenous and black communities to embrace grief in their own collective way.

[@JP2GiannaT]

I dunno, no one likes traditional living room Irish wakes anymore either, or charnel houses. Both of those are European, so melianan deficient individuals. I blame it on the vestiges of Puritan or repressed Victorian/WASP culture. I don't think saying "white supremcy" is fair when a lot of traditional European (other than those originating in Britain) expressions of grief are taboo as well.

[@sekedad4819]

@@JP2GiannaT suggestion: if you’re white, and a person of color is discussing how white supremacy affects their life, and you get the urge to say “nuh uh that’s not white supremacy,” just don’t. Just don’t do it. Very simple suggestion.

[@nicolecollins3931]

Give me a break with the whole white supremacy thing. It's getting super old

[@sekedad4819]

@@nicolecollins3931 sure, when you stop propping up white people over everyone else by denying any attempts to even marginally improve equity. Until then, nah.

[@nicolecollins3931]

@@sekedad4819 what??? Get over yourself

[@lindsayerin2738]

I went to a funeral a couple weeks ago for my husband's grandmother, where a pastor that never knew her preached a fill-in-the-blank with the deceased's name sermon. It was so unpersonal and formal to the point it felt insincere. By contrast, a friend of mine died when I was 17 and he was 19. His parents played pop music and invited exotic dancers to his wake, and he was presented in the casket in cargo shorts, his favorite Raybans, holding a coke can and an Xbox controller. His parents walked in to the chapel to the Halo 3 theme when the funeral started, and the casket left to the tune of Smile by Uncle Cracker. No one was allowed to wear black. His wake and funeral felt like a big party. It felt personal, and it felt like we sent him off the way he would have wanted. My point is if what it takes for you to celebrate someone's life in a way for you to feel like actually honors the person and feels personal is to prop the body up on stage and have a big dance party with it, DO IT. Celebrate their life as you grieve, because it will mean more to you in the years to come than the unpersonal sermon you've forgotten two weeks later.

[@roxannemacias2626]

That was a truly heartbreaking yet most beautiful end to a trajedy, I've ever heard. My condolences yet Good for you and your friends and his parents to send him off right!

[@jonesfamilyfarms9325]

My husband is a pastor and we both HATE the fill in the blank preachers, it’s so informal and misses the mark entirely. I hate that y’all went through that!

[@35jfg35]

what the fck is going on here lol

[@jaiyabyrd4177]

If we look at a funerary celebration from New Orleans the body is in a casket being moved to it final resting place to Jazz music 🎵🎶

[@carlabarrick8538]

I wholeheartedly agree with you. 💜

[@blugreen123]

The guy on the motorcycle was encased in a glass box. Gooknew was out in the open at a club. That might be part of why people reacted so differently.

[@macgyversmacbook1861]

THIS. Someone might go into anaphylactic shock because they’re allergic to formaldehyde, the body being exposed could very well lead to that. My brother is deathly allergic to formaldehyde, we only found out because our father is a mortician and we lived above a funeral home. It was horrific when my brother had a reaction, he went into full on seizures

[@Got2BarrelRace4Life]

What a great way to start the morning! Mourn your dead how you want to mourn your dead. I think this is unconventional but beautiful. He’s probably up there proud and pleased that his family didn’t want him to conform to social norms and sent him out with a bang. His family gave him the ultimate send off and showed their loyalty to him by thinking of what he would’ve wanted even after he had moved on from this world. There is no status quo for grieving our dead!

[@dawn7818]

Goonew’s final performance was a beautiful tribute! It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks…it gave his family comfort and celebrated his life. Blessings to his family, friends and community, and may he rest peacefully knowing all he meant to the world, and how much he will always be loved.

[@19thunder63]

I have been watching you for about 2 weeks now and I really enjoy your stories. This one is really close to home. I was born and raised in Sabina, Ohio. I never got to see Eugene because I was born after he was buried but he is a legend around here. This is a small town where everybody knows everybody. Thanks for mentioning him.

[@griffin1155]

my mother didn’t get the death care she wanted and i’ll never forgive my family for it. she had told me multiple times over the course of her terminal illness that she wanted to be donated to science (to a body farm specifically) and i know she only talked to me about this because no one else would have understood her. she was in the medical field and was interested in true crime. but in the end she told my father she wanted to be cremated despite having always told me she hated the idea. she set aside her choice for what would be easiest for her relatives to stomach.

[@spiritmatter1553]

How sad. But in life she had probably contributed to science more than the usual Body Farm resident. It was selfless of her to choose cremation for the comfort of her family although it didn’t appeal to her personally. Just my opinion. It’s hard to lose your Mom. I know. ☮️

[@thomasdye6424]

I remember Nipsey Hussle's funeral where they drove his coffin through the streets of South and Central LA, home to his rap fans. I never heard of him, but watching that procession and seeing all those thousands of kids in the streets celebrating his life was glorious, and I really admired that choice.

[@spiritmatter1553]

The flowers were amazing, shades of purple, very artistic.

[@onemillionpercent]

what an important concept. memento mori!

[@MsJimmysgirl]

that is different than propping a body up in a bar.... Biggy Smalls mother did the same thing when bringing him back to New York with the hurce driving through the streets with his music playing.

[@onemillionpercent]

@@MsJimmysgirl why are you differentiating them like this, aside from arbitrary personal standards of comfort though?

[@Arlothed1no]

I think this is such a powerful service. We are supposed to have a socially acceptable form of grieving regardless of how it's done. The family chose this because they know their son and that is a beautiful thing. If this brings the family peace after the loss of their son, then the event did its job.

[@brandybrooks8363]

Both my parents are passed. I had a memorial service for them that was considered very non traditional in the American south. We shared stories. We sang. We sat together and remembered them. In the good times. I had the privilege of being able to sit with them at the funeral. I’m very luck that the last thing I said to them both is I Love You. Brought me comfort

[@kiki29073]

That's normal in the South. I've never been to a memorial or funeral in the South that wasn't like this.

[@MaddHeather]

@@kiki29073 I came to say the same thing.. also I live in Ohio and all the funerals I have been to has been this way🤷‍♀️

[@SwearMY]

Sounds like a wonderful way to send off the young man in accordance with his life and his families' wishes. Similar to an old fashioned Irish wake. Rest in Power Goonew.

[@princeapoopoo5787]

If anything is proof that I heeded Caitlin's warning in the intro, it is that I did not even know this man existed, let alone had his body propped up in a nightclub. I won't lie, if I came across this out of context, I probably would have been put off for reasons mentioned in the video, but in the end, as long as no one is being hurt ... who cares? Ain't no business of mine.

[@michellerobin5461]

I had no idea either! So I too came in with an open mind, and I’m glad I did!

[@ElysetheEevee]

I'd not heard of this as well. I probably would've questioned it a bit just seeing the clip of him posted there. However, once they pan out to crowd, and everyone is dancing and whatnot, I would've likely looked up background info on it, providing someone commented who it was or it was in the description somewhere. I'd always prefer to know the intent behind something first. That's usually the most important component to a situation like this.

[@JaimeMesChiens]

Markelle was talented and such a sweet young man. I think his home-going event was wonderful. What a beautiful family. They honoured Goonew in such a unique way that reflects his short-and beautiful life. If this helps the family cope with such a tragic loss, good for them. Why is this different from a wake, when everyone walks by and stares at a dead body? I find nothing wrong with this lovely tribute. ❤ May his memory be a blessing.

[@mothnightingale7004]

i’m always appreciative of dr. fletcher’s insight. i am not black, but i am indigenous. i know our funeral and mourning traditions. i understand and love them. to the white people in my life they may seem bizarre or maybe don’t make a lot of sense, but to us it’s right. to us it’s the best way to give ourselves back to the Creator. to be “sent home,” in the words of goonew’s mother. i think knowing my traditional funeral practices has allowed me to be more open to the idea of other culture’s funeral practices. i think it’s truly beautiful that they were able to celebrate his life the way he lived, onstage being adored by the people who loved him and who he loved. i hope when i die, even if i don’t have a traditional funeral, it’s the way i would have wanted to be sent home to the Creator.

[@zuzuspetals9281]

As someone who descended from Vikings, I understand ceremonies that aren’t traditional now but I’d prefer, such as being on a wooden boat that’s lit on fire as it floats out to sea. Even white people have cool ways to return naturally to the Creator with dignity.

[@GreebleClown]

@@zuzuspetals9281 that’s not quite what the Norse did traditionally, that’s a modern interpretation, but if that’s what you want I think that’s a beautiful way to go. :)

[@TheMeloettaful]

Even though I myself wouldn't want a traditional/extreme funeral service I wholeheartedly respect and honor Goonew's family decision on this. And kudos to them for sticking to their guns & not apologize for how they choose to send their loved one off! If he never went to church or wore a suit then heck having the service at a nightclub is freakin perfect especially since the deceased was a rapper in life. And like Caitlin I'm also dubious about the club owners' "limited" knowledge on what was going on in their own establishment 🤔. I would like to hope someday my family will do what I want done to my mortal remains instead of just doing what everyone else expects to be done. Unless the deceased left a WILL stating otherwise what's to be done let the family do what they got to do to send their loved one off and to mourn in their own way! You may not understand it or like it, but at least respect the family's decision 🙂🙏. Sorry for my rambling this whole thing with Goonew's family and certain people being scandalized by this nightclub service has me feeling some type of way 😡😤😕.

[@Khenfu_Cake]

@@GreebleClown Indeed, they most certainly did not. Not only wouldn't a ship burn down to the waterline that easily those longships were also not something people would "waste" like that. Old Norse longship construction took time.

[@unicornL]

@@zuzuspetals9281 I hope you get that and if you do- I'm not gonna lie, I'm a wee bit jealous

[@hootax8980]

This is fascinating even if its unconventional. So long as the family is happy, I'd say it's nobody else's business how memorials/funerals are held. Much love to his family.

[@othersbyuri]

I’m glad they touched on the history of what’s conventional in terms of history and how we demonize based on how we perceive judgment. It’s so much deeper. ✌🏽 to the family

[@d.burton6889]

That would be true if they didn't post it. People are posting everything. I thought the thing was 3 to 5 years ago. Nobody wanted government spying on them. They don't have to today, people are giving the information freely.

[@Shewas-kathybates]

Well if it’s a hazard I would hope someone would say something. That would be the right thing to do.

[@ars0ni150]

He could have had a cemetery funeral, they could have sang Boyz 2 Men. But whatever I don't want them to shoot me sooo

[@ars0ni150]

They want publicity and parties and attention off of him even after death. Terrible.

[@BMarie774]

While I don’t really think I’d ever do it THIS way..we have lost the meaning of “celebration of life”. There’s only been two I’ve gone to where it was an actual celebration of someone’s life. I can vividly hear the mother still saying “praise god we got 19 years, I’d have loved more but praise god for 19”, and people truly CELEBRATED their life and accomplishments. People spoke on their strong points, and told funny stories. The atmosphere was so….just supportive of one another. But also truly celebrating the life of this young person gone far too soon.

[@MultiSoulcollector]

Catlin only you could have given the family this type of voice, You take a traditionally taboo subject an make it real an passionate, You always keep it 100%. with your wit an humor. THANK YOU

[@tashajackson1905]

My friend was sitting up in his wheelchair with his phone and cigarettes sitting on his lap where it would usually be and a Corona sitting beside him at his funeral he always said that's what he wanted and his mom actually did it for him he was on the news but didn't get no backlash

[@alexanderboyer7720]

Dude in the wheelchair is more relatable than a rapper. Looking up at someone because “you won’t look down on my son” feels weird. Some women go overboard for their children.

[@Hack_The_Planet_]

This is pretty different

[@tashajackson1905]

@@Hack_The_Planet_ yeah I'm just saying give people their wish

[@PinkyPuff69]

Also, I really respect the way you presented the story of this young man's life and his death. You always educate us and give the utmost regard to the subject of death, dying and the dead.

[@brownavatar8]

This is my first time seeing your content and I really appreciate how well and respectfully you covered this young man's funeral and the controversy about it.

[@charamia9402]

I loved this. This was - clearly - the right way for Goonews loved ones to say farewell. It wouldn't be right for me (i want to be buried unembalmed to decompose), but that does not give me the right to dismiss their way. The first time I heard of extreme embalming like this, was the jazz musician Lionel Batistes passing in 2012. He was standing up, in a proper New Orleans jazz fest. Celebrating his life. I hope my funeral will be a celebration of my life rather than a sombre farewell.

[@hellothere702]

Same, religious rules mandate that I not be embalmed and buried within a few days of my death but even I can see the strange beauty of embalming. He looked amazing and I can't imagine the feeling of being a mother and still being able to see your son as he was in life after death, I would've cried of joy.

[@charamia9402]

@@hellothere702 Yes, it's just different strokes for different folks, as they say. For me it's a logical thing - I've been using the earths resources in life, it's only fair to give back whatever's left. That doesn't make embalming wrong - it's just about personal preference. And I would argue the same goes for you - your personal preference is to follow your religions mandate. That's what's right for you.

[@NuclearOctopusXx]

Goonew's family, friends, and community knew him best. I'm absolutely sure...just by seeing them stand by their decision for his celebration of life, that he would have loved his service more than anything. It's beautiful to see people do something so personalized and intimate with their lost loved ones.

[@Joemnc]

I saw a funeral online and the deceased young woman’s casket was almost upright because her mother did not want people looking down at her child’s body and I truly understood her.

[@Lowdermoomoo]

“Because it was a corpse in a nightclub” the way I screamed 🤣 that was so direct I love it.

[@sinverrette9803]

Right 😆

[@Shivaugnn]

Look if I would have walked in a club looking for a good time and walked in to see a corpse yes i am getting the hell outta dodge 🥴

[@karabokgoleng7952]

I love this channel. Black South African death rituals and experiences are remarkably similar except the funeral at a club is yet to come I love Dr Fletcher!

[@Kim-pg6hh]

When I was a little girl, we had our dead in our sitting room. My great granny was in her rocking chair, and my uncle's took her, her chair out on our porch. She had her lemonade and pie at her little table. No one thought it was improper! Folks need to deal with thier own life. Leave this family alone!

[@carolecampbell8813]

I am a 68 year old "white lady" who thinks this was a fantastic send-off! When younger I worried if I had a child die what I would do. Thought people would think I was crazy as I didn't want a regular funeral but find a way to stay as long as possible with them. Today, parents are being allowed to spend days with their newborn after they pass. They aren't embalmed I don't think as they have little cooling beds to have them in when not holding them. Not that long ago parents were encouraged to not see, or name these babies. I live in Ohio and my dad took us to see EUGENE about 1960. He was in a little enclosure it seems out near front of property. At that time all we knew was respectful and sympathy towards him. People still wondered what his family or who he was going to see thought happened to him. Just recently I was just thinking about the possibility of them having anything that could have DNA on it to try testing for relatives. Wouldn't it be great to find his family today? I don't believe the funeral home did anything out of disrespectful thoughts of him. It's still sad to know that people could leave their home to travel for whatever reason and then never hear from them again. Wish I could go out in some fantastic unusual way myself!! 🎆

[@banrap9369]

Lmao u celebrating a male that likley exploited & objectified ur own kind!! a misogynist cringe

[@Iris-zq5mq]

Every time period / culture has their own way of having wake/celebration of life ceremonies. I remember going to see my grandmother in her casket in her own home back in the late 70s with family members sleeping in the same house during the wake. I didn’t find it strange. Nowadays that would be considered creepy yet some cultures still practice it. Americans used to pose and get pictures taken with their passed loved ones in the turn of the century too. Funny how perceptions changed through the years.

[@mridgafwytowell1210]

I love this channel when I saw you laying on that table I thought to myself this is got to be one of the best persons in the whole wide world you are amazing thank you for what you do

[@JoAnnaQuincey]

I think its awesome that Goonew's family gave him the service he wanted and in a way to allow the community and fans to say goodbye

[@nikkij4873]

Let families grieve their loved ones in their own way. Sounds like such an obvious statement yet here we are. Great video!!

[@venusfive2102]

I really loved this episode, as this was a heavy topic in the local DMV area.

[@MrVintageRestoration]

As a guy with a fascination with the business of death (almost double majored in Mortuary science, but decided I have an aversion to the gritty side of the business) I personally feel the family did him a perfect and fitting final memorial. Every one is different and as such, how we get our final send off should be as unique as the individual.

[@taniaABal]

At first I thought the club and the funeral home did this behind the family's back, but as I started to see the family's interviews I thought they were doing what was best for them. Props to the family for now letting the public change their view.

[@jameslipke354]

What an amazing Homegoing and Celebration of Life!!! Well done! Well done indeed! Respect. The self appointed self righteous are afraid of anything they don't personally umderstand as well as their own shadows. They need to get a hobby and stop being so precocious. Good grief. Aa a child, I sat up with the dead one night laying in state at their home. I'm originally from Georgia and my Mom was born and raised in Tennessee. I'll be 57 next month, and even though I've lived in the Midwest since I was 8 years old, I still observe the old ways I was raised with when someone passes away in their home as my parents did. Stopping the clock, draping the mirrors in black, etc. Those traditions exist for a reason. Families have every right to grieve in the way that honors and respects the love for their family member. As in this case, outside approval is not required, desired or needed. My parents were cremated with no Memorial Service and only the standard death notice printed in the local newspaper per their requests. As my Dad said, "I know who I love. I know who loves me. I know who I am and what I've done in my life. That's no one else's damned business." I agree wholeheartedly. After Dad passed away, one of my Aunt's, his sister, said to me, "Well, I don't go for that scattering of the ashes business, so your Dad's urn can be interred with the large brass military "stone" at the cemetery." I calmly replied, I respect how you feel, however, the ONLY PERSONS WISHES THAT MATTERED WERE DAD'S. He knew I would, to the very best of ny ability, to a "T", see that his wishes were the ONLY ones honored. That included specific instructions on how, where and who would be present when his ashes are/were scattered. You don't have to like it, but you will respect it." I am my Dad's daughter and my Dad was a US Marine. My Mom told me to make sure when she was cremated that the song Disco Inferno by The Trampps be played because it was a celebration for her 'New Smokin' Hot Body'; and it was. My Mom was 74 when she passed. 😂 The funeral home that handled Dad's cremation, and then handled my Mom's 2 years and 11 months after Dad's, has been family owned for going on 4 generations now. The founders were my parents generation, their kids and I are the same generation and grew up knowing each other, and the two grandsons we dealt with, well, let me just say their family business couldn't be in any better hands than those two boys, young men, that take care of the business now. Thanks for sharing Caitlin! ❤ ~ APRIL LIPKE

[@RedPanda79]

A mother lost her child, let her do it her way and the way she knew it would have wanted to leave. I really love how all these videos are respectful of the topics and cover all the bases.

[@dolinaj1]

“It?”

[@RedPanda79]

@@dolinaj1 this is a shocker I know but....people make typos. And we can use common sense to figure out what the person was trying to say or point out an 8 month old mistake.

[@bethrogers5553]

Everything that woman who was being interviewed said was bull. No one cares what anyone else does. I could care less how other people carry out funeral arrangements.

[@Nikki_with_the_blikki]

​@@bethrogers5553are you black?

[@brendab.5111]

A beautiful way to celebrate a loved one’s life. I like it. ❤

[@reno.corona]

There is a massive difference between exploitation and presentation. Obviously the family knew him well and did what was appropriate for him in death, and I respect them greatly for that. I hope I have such a great support system when I die!