Ass Pennies - Upright Citizens Brigade

[@HamburgerMolester]

I like how he says "and then you spend them" like that statement alone is supposed to clear up any and all confusion.

[@sunsguide6624]

😂 me to I also like when he says "Now here's where the Magic comes in" lol he believes the whole concept is Magical 😂😂😂😂😂😂.

[@johntompkins9282]

😂😂😂😂😅

[@growthtoglory6111]

@@johntompkins9282ooo

[@Atodaso]

I mean... Does it not? ;)

[@slandon1977]

I had to watch it a second time to confirm... yup. All done in one unbroken take. Even more respect.

[@Willtur1]

never paid attention to that but good job pointing it out.

[@TheAnantaSesa]

Southern Fun; the "children of men" movie had super long single camera scenes. But I never realized this was one take til just now. UCB was legendary!

[@arock99]

Southern Fun well sure they could. This is sketch comedy. Are you implying that good sketch actors faded away in the mid 90’s?

[@arock99]

AnantaSesaDas so did “snake eyes” starring Nick Cage, watch the beginning of that movie. It’s cute and all but a good actor it doesn’t make...

[@TheAnantaSesa]

arock99, I don't like UCB because they were good actors but because their scripts are just so funny. I do like the long cut scenes though. And they've gotta be more difficult for bad actors to do well.

[@VideoAmericanStyle]

The best line: “One at a time, of course!”

[@Margar02]

Hahaha I'm like $30 a day in pennies? That's 3000 pennies a day! One at a time?? How much time that guy got??

[@mikefallopian3191]

I gotta go with 1:38 .

[@ellisdtrails420]

To this day, if someone effs up in anything, I will say, "SUCK."

[@jewfroDZak]

I'm partial to "Suck" right at the start.

[@IWubYooz]

@@Margar02 I think “One at at a time” was just advice for him as a newbie. If it takes 10 seconds per penny on average, that’s 8 hours a day. Do people making 8 figures a year have that kind of time? Once you get good at it, you can probably handle all $30 worth at a time no problem.

[@dvents4363]

I watched this when it first aired 20 years, 1 month, and 10 days ago and I have been following his method since. That is 22,035,000 pennies to this day. Was it worth it? Check your pockets and you tell me.

[@briana9854]

Lol everyone uses debit/credit cards now so there's no poi-H MY GOD I HAVE $23.16 IN PENNIES IN MY MOUTH.

[@VinnieBagofDonuts]

I started doing it with quarters due to inflation.

[@69mickswagg]

@@VinnieBagofDonuts i go straight to the source. Ive been putting 30 pounds of Mexican plastic in my ass for 20 years. If you own a debit card, you've probably handled my ass plastic.

[@scammann30]

Good god that's nearly 11 times the population of Nebraska.

[@JerimiahGentry]

"hey Jimmy, I'm trying to be more confident with my comedic improv, any tips?"

[@mikewatkinson1996]

Ill never forget this sketch. I watched it over and over in the early 2000s.....its literally one of my favorite sketches of all time. The concept, the deliveries, the argument, the math....omfg ill never not laugh at this....or pick up a penny ever again.

[@saltysergeant4284]

It's not just pennies, dude. Dimes are smaller...

[@ltopomcfly5583]

And the fact its one continuous shot

[@andrewkelly6828]

I liked how in some sketches after this, like in stores and stuff, there'd be signs like "No Ass Pennies." Classic.

[@mshef140]

I forgot all about that! Haha

[@romulusnr]

They put up a fake website advertising an "ass penny detector" after this episode

[@chouseification]

a dude in my fraternity REALLY REALLY loved the concept of an ass-penny. I never ever took anything he tried to hand to me, as he was exactly the type of guy to actually "bless" all his pennies but possibly not wash his hands after? :D

[@righteousdivine]

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@GBart]

That's what I love about this show - they do that with a lot of jokes

[@kornsin]

The cinematography alone is amazing but the line "one at a time of course" paints the greatest picture ever.

[@punksofnewengland]

All filmed in one shot, so awesome

[@fizgak]

The steady escalation is near-perfect - one of the best 5 minute sketches in comedy history!

[@Failedprodegy42]

When my oldest daughter turned 21, she asked me to tell her a gross story while we were drinking beer. I showed her this video instead. She laughed so hard beer came out her nose. Every year at Christmas when Grandpa gives the kids change out of his pocket we both start giggling and have to leave the room.

[@ws4jb]

Vanger48912 you sound like an awesome dad. Serious.

[@Exilis]

But only you know that some of that change, at some point, has been inside your ass.

[@TrouvatkiDePercusion]

@Sorcerer of Death's Construction Now THAT is how you bond with your child!

[@iusegentoobtw]

p sure your name is a King Crimson reference. Nice

[@naturaljoe759]

@@iusegentoobtw “War Pigs” by Black Sabbath

[@eXiLe824]

My favorite part of how psychotic his advice is, is that it's so much work yet completely falls apart if Bellamy simply pays with a card.

[@Sam-qc2hi]

You think you're better than me?

[@thegreatnoldini]

Back then cash was still king

[@freelance_commie]

Hey I mean placebo or psychosomatic or whatever still gives the confidence probably lol

[@jeremiahaticf]

Back then cash was still used a loy

[@flashypork]

He's not even gonna get change at a restaurant lol. You're always gonna pay extra with the tip

[@stevenspenneberg7407]

I saw this when it first aired. I’ve thought of it EVERY time I’ve seen pennies since. As I watch it now, I’m impressed that it’s shot in ONE take. The Cameraman gets on a golf cart. Gets off follows them. Pans to other golfers and faces right on time. Very impressive

[@saltysergeant4284]

This is the most brilliant thing, ever. What subtle devious dominance over a pocket of society. "You throw my pennies into fountains and make wishes on them. You handle my pennies everyday. ALL of you! You _ALL_ handle my pennies!!" How terrifying. Edit: _you_ _think_ _you're_ _better_ _than_ _me_ ???

[@BillAngelos]

So glad there is finally a decent version on yt so I don't need to try and find it on some other site and have it be super low quality. Thanks comedy central.

[@jfreddy9370]

This was an amazing sketch. I saw this the night it aired and I have never forgotten about it.

[@alistairproductions]

It’s gotta be one of the best ever

[@Temple_of_An00bis]

Same. What is it about this sketch? It's got something special.

[@rockitmorton]

When he starts bringing the math into it. Long term strategy Lol

[@saltysergeant4284]

You can see the mild disgust turn into absolute horror as he goes further along the eleven years. Do you think you're better than me?? You handle my pennies every day.

[@MapexMiata]

I could totally see this being a scene with Dennis in It's Always Sunny

[@marleyschwartz8004]

Oh, he would.

[@JohnDoe-ni3bt]

I guarantee someones been doing this since they saw this

[@timkayjr2958]

I dont look at penny's anymore

[@eidolor]

Dimes instead of pennies, ever since summer of 98’

[@ianjay4596]

Right here

[@cerealkiller195]

then they have the upper hand.you going to let some guy ass penny you?

[@Moridorable]

I did one afternoon. Acid was involved.

[@ws4jb]

FINALLY! I’ve been having to recite this thing off memory for 15 damn years

[@MrJobelp]

Jared bLUThES when did this come out?!

[@ws4jb]

11dark Knight11 actually it was 1998, I had the whole series on DVD at one point but lost them in college.

[@ws4jb]

Also just realizing I should not have been watching this at 12....

[@vicmclaglen1631]

I got lucky and by chance recorded it on VHS back around '98. It has remained "ASS PENNIES" in my VHS catalog.

[@vicmclaglen1631]

Yeah this same episode also included the I've got a New Brain seminar and the Ultra Minimalist office building in the forest. In the end each skit mixes together and they all end up running through the forest. Loved how they would do that at the end, where all the characters get thrown into one single skit.

[@ghadrackpotato960]

Possibly the single funniest skit in the history of sketch comedy. I laugh till I cry every time I see it still 25 years later. "You throw my ass pennies in fountains and make wishes on them, You give my ass pennies to your little daughter to buy gumballs"

[@arethur]

yo, im here 2 years after you saying the same thing

[@ContentWizard]

I have actually stated this to some of my friends (that this may be the best comedy sketch in history). Gold standard (make that diamond standard)! If I were to pick another at least at the same flying altitude, I would say have a look at Key and Peele's ""Prepared for Terris!""

[@pjh2331]

This show was way ahead of it's time

[@kattc7149]

I have thought of this sketch at least once a month since this aired in the '90s. I still hate touching pennies; you know someone did this after watching this.

[@DLTA5]

I'm so thankful for the internet. This is one of my favorite sketches of all time.

[@andrewroberts7428]

EIGHT TIMES THE POPULATION OF NEBRASKA!!!

[@robm5031]

It was hilarious the first time I saw this as a kid, and this is still hilarious years later

[@mcbillygoat2413]

I wasn’t intimidated by this guy until I realized that I have been handling his ass pennies.

[@drewpowers7236]

The dark villainous delivery of "oh my...you got a few pennies in there don't you" kills me lol

[@mchoffner8497]

One of my all-time favorites. Love Ian, would like to see more of him. Consider myself exceptionally lucky to go to the old theater to see the great originals of UCB -Matt, Matt, Ian, Amy, and so many others they molded, especially Andy Daly. They were free and $5 shows. Priceless time. IMPROV 4 HUMANS!

[@vitamin3076]

One at a time of course!

[@mr.techaky7655]

Only real men stick an entire roll up there... saves time.

[@GingerHead.]

@@mr.techaky7655 only a roll?

[@lalalaLaFlex]

This is a one shot! This is not only brilliant comedy, but also cinematography.

[@idavid24]

I use this strategy with nickels. Had to adjust for inflation.

[@BlindErephon]

I never once forgot this sketch since it first aired.

[@DaveKap]

I've never forgotten this skit since it first aired but coming back to it and seeing that it's just one long take is phenomenal. No wonder it has such a visceral effect.

[@Christstuffer]

This is my first time watching this skit since it first aired and never forgot about it. That's just how memorable it was.

[@anthonylijovic6227]

Same!

[@sammyscurse4518]

Knew u were alive

[@Christstuffer]

@@sammyscurse4518 Thank you brother. I believe you are alive too!

[@ellisdtrails420]

This brings me great joy. Even as a middle schooler all those years ago. I plan being able to recite this word for word the next time an asshole thinks he's better than me. Yes, he'll probably beat my ass, but he'll never forget those words. PTSD can go both ways my friend.....

[@letolethe3344]

Yeah, you need better goals, my man.

[@darinbasile6754]

I come back to this once in a while. Such brilliance.

[@macdeus2601]

Finally this is on KZbin again. This show was really hit or miss, but when it hit it was fucking brilliant.

[@pjh2331]

I remember seeing this when I was in my early teens and thinking it was just weird. I'm 35 now and I think it's brilliant and hysterical. Not sure what that says about me haha...

[@johnjames9728]

I thought I was the only one who did this. Time to move up to quarters.

[@kirbygholson1135]

John James you can break a quarter but nothing breaks a penny

[@sdfkjgh]

Kirby Gholson: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Half_cent_(United_States_coin)

[@d1amondd52]

I just discovered this rare gem of a video and I can't stop laughing

[@saltysergeant4284]

Until you realize it was made WELL over 11 years ago....

[@dontpaniciceland]

All in one, single, uninterrupted Steadicam shot. This sketch is brilliantly-done for many reasons.

[@dimitrifernando7909]

Greatest single take since Children of Men?

[@crystaliss]

lol! Yes.

[@TheAnantaSesa]

This first aired in 1998.

[@AdhamOhm]

Wow, I've watched this skit so many times over the years and it never occurred to me that it was all done in one take. Another reason Ass Pennies is one of the best routines in TV history.

[@markuskildemaa2351]

How about Birdman?

[@Magitek85]

There are hidden cuts in that Children of Men scene.

[@ImJeanGaming]

1 take for this is insanely well done

[@chrisp2481]

I was 12 when I saw this. Just showed my 17-year-old and she loved it. God bless whoever finally posted this.

[@udayandwivedii]

Chris P this show came out in 1998. Your daughter is 17. Did you have her when you were 14!!?

[@mtsr555]

Bullshitter

[@venusinblurs9430]

Chris P What a weird thing to lie about.

[@CINTERPOL]

Lmao

[@chrisp2481]

Udayan Dwivedi thought i replied to this. If 1998, then I was 16 when I saw it. i'm 19 years older than my oldest.

[@RygorMortis]

Never again will there be a sketch as utterly brilliant as this one. UCB should be proud.

[@tmcnairbledsoe]

Oh man I keep coming back to this. Great skit.

[@vitaminB36476]

I almost forgot to watch this today

[@slowpoke6743]

It's been 37,768 days since I first saw this bit. That's alotta ass pennies out there my friend

[@undercolor6110]

There are 365 days in a year. You said it's been 37,768 days since you saw this. That would mean that it's been at least 103 years since you've seen this. Either you're from the future and have an incredibly lucky health streak, or you're just bad at math. It's only been around 7,000 days since the skit even aired back in 1998.

[@slowpoke6743]

Professor Buttersticks I'm getting the feeling you aren't living your life to its fullest potential. Are you going through hard times? Depression can affect anyone. You're not superman. Its ok to ask for help. People are naturally kind and empathetic. They will surprise you if you just let down your guard. We all need help now and again. Here, take this💰bag full of pennies and go toss them in a wishing well one at a time. I promise, by the time they're gone, you'll be feeling better.

[@undercolor6110]

Called him out on a little math error and he tries to call me depressed. Yep, I sure am. I also graduated basic math classes. I would go toss those pennies one at a time but I don't want to take more from you than you may want to give me, you'd best let someone else count them first. We all gotta pinch our pennies at some points.

[@slowpoke6743]

Professor Buttersticks maybe you can learn to add a sense of humor with them basic math chops.

[@undercolor6110]

Oh I have one, it's just being used in a different light.

[@harrysapienn7911]

Wow, the creativity to come up with something like this, all shot in one take (if I'm not mistaken). Truly remarkable!!!! Too effing funny...

[@mr.serious9538]

This is my favorite comedy sketch of all time.

[@mrbungel22]

Yes!

[@WilliamHaisch]

As a Nebraskan, the line “8 times the population of Nebraska” (3:30) always makes me laugh! 😂

[@jaywood5831]

That "oh my" gets me every single time

[@everettmw]

I cant believe this was all done in one take

[@893loses]

this is a very effective life hack. I got drunk one night a decade ago and pissed all over the door handles of my abusive owner's restaurant. After that I floated through every shift as though riding a cloud

[@g0ezle0nard96]

Dylan Crosson you sir gained the “upper hand” in the situation, well played.

[@TBBucYou]

Sheeeeit, I'll piss on someone's door handle that parks too close to my car!

[@colinhale7378]

This is the most wholesome thing ever.

[@ironman4122]

Anyone else here cuz of AJ Hawk? For the Brand!

[@EmmettLBrown2015]

I miss this show so much, I never missed an episode on Comedy Central

[@kitchenasmr6876]

This is the Citizen Kane of sketch comedy.

[@fortyoz.4350]

I remember seeing this on TV when I was a kid. still hilarious

[@g0ezle0nard96]

golgus 84 me too was burned into my subconscious with the ASS pennies. Looked upon the red cent with disgust almost laughing at those who handle them.

[@SharktopusMilk]

Greatest series of all time! Three seasons of glory: bucket of truth, supercool, thunderball

[@chaosmastermind]

This is just pure art. Here it is 30 years later and I still remember this.

[@davidlee4903]

24 years but yes, here we are.

[@CraigWhargoul]

My Favorite comedy skit of all time.

[@doctorimpossible74]

The camera work in this was excellent.

[@droogie76]

A true masterpiece of sketch comedy.

[@brotherivy7694]

This never gets old.

[@alexanderklimek9354]

Who else ended up here after AJ Hawk mentioned this on Pat McAfee show lol

[@DemoniteBL]

Just saw this for the first time. This is from 1998? Then the joke is as old as I am. lol

[@analyrical]

I still laugh hysterically every time "You think you're better than me? Oh, you're not better than me. " "Oh my...looks like youve got some pennies in there." " one at a time, of course." 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@jerodwilson]

This clip has lived in my head since ‘98 or whenever it was on

[@manueljuarez3626]

Just came from the pat McAfee and AJ hawk show

[@agentham]

I still think of this ever single time a penny passes through my custody.

[@maxtew6521]

Still thrillingly demented and hilarious after all these years.

[@tedbayham1849]

🗣 THANK YOU AJ

[@dankafuba]

This was recorded in one take this is impressive quality joke quality acting

[@TheFlyingHeart]

This is the quintessential UCB sketch. It’s the only one I remember. I think of it every time I see a penny.

[@namelesswalaby]

"and then spend it" *tees off*

[@deathground7766]

One of the best skits of all time...hands down.

[@yeskev]

I switched to dollar bills and ink pens. Gotta give the pens away at restaurants and banks. Not as effective as the old days but every bit of an edge helps.

[@alexoblivion9295]

Henry the Eighth had a chamberpot made of solid gold. He only ever used it once. Then he had it melted down into gold coins and distributed.

[@FeydTheRonin]

I have remembered this my entire life ever since I saw it on TV like 20 years ago. I only now realize it was done in a single continuous shot.

[@Moss-z7c]

crazy how smooth they got the golf cart shot

[@testtube173]

Nobody seems to realize this is all 1 single shot and take. They get through the entire skit without breaking or smiling or stuttering. Its delivered perfectly and has to be one of the most insane premises for a comedy skit.

[@man_mojack]

This is the best sketch ever made, bar none. You know it’s true.

[@gavinf28]

Captain sparklez on Pokays channel anyone?

[@mason500]

Gavin F asspenis 8

[@lukasstrandberg5145]

Yup

[@mejai2604]

I wonder if The Cap does this...

[@stabbdd]

yea

[@rapheleven]

Tatoo yikes

[@arsxxmoriendi]

Greatest sketch of all time. To this day, I can barely get through a job interview without having this run through my head and trying not to laugh. Interviewer: what's so funny? Me: You really wanna know?

[@randomsimpson]

"Penny for your thoughts?"

[@MarkB-vp9ki]

Glad to see I'm not the only one who did this.

[@jevicci]

Love the "Oh my" at 3:10

[@ContentWizard]

DIAMOND-LEVEL!! If I were to pick another at least at the same flying altitude, I would say have a look at Key and Peele's "Prepared for Terris!"

[@SchmuckMartin]

This makes me cry every time I watch it.

[@OliverUnderTheMoon]

This guy's delivery reminds me of how Jeff Anderson plays Randal in Clerks.

[@mariahrocks4050]

A version of this is running on tiktok. New to a new generation. 🧐🤗💫

[@mariahrocks4050]

The tiktok is more to say Physical $$$ is disgusting & 🫣 who knows where it's been. 🤔🤪👍. Paper & coins r a nope. ;)

[@Adamisgood24]

Every Monday night, me and my friend, watched Upright Citizens Brigade, while smoking weed! It is still so funny!

[@princeofcats6883]

This, little donnie, "in bed" fortune cookie game, the poo stick, the titular line... ALL look like they would be SO fun to act out on stage...

[@richardhutchison3123]

Wow this monologue had to be done several times to keep the actors from breaking in to uncontrollable fits of laughter!

[@Cosumik]

This is such a Dennis Reynolds move

[@hugogirardisking]

The blocking and cinematography are phenomenal in this sketch.

[@ProducerSurvivalHandbook]

One of the best skits ever from one of the best comedy teams ever.

[@Jwheelz86]

2 years later and we have a coin shortage...federal reserve my ass

[@PlayWaves1]

Ha!

[@Mortuary_Gaming]

The writer of this episode might as well have been writing this scene for Dante and Randall from Clerks 😂 the dialogue style and character dynamic is identical.

[@Threaopolieze]

This is my favorite skit from this show... I still mention this to people.😊

[@alleyviper95]

How does this skit not have millions of views?

[@ModernDayMagus]

This is the natural evolution of the mallrats stink hand joke.

[@goparetraitors4156]

Best comedy show ever!!!! Also best way to know if someone is cool if they know about ass pennies.

[@g0ezle0nard96]

Shane Archuleta rest assured it’s a small sample who truly experienced this skit and hold it near and dear.