Baby It's Certified

Looking for something to do this holiday season, data teams?
Why not fire up the karaoke machine and sing your heart out to a Christmas classic: Baby, It's Certified!
Lyrics: Will Robins
The data’s weird today
But baby, it’s certified
The trendline’s astray
It’s got 10 checks applied
This data has been
Perfect and clean
Wonky all month
No way! This pipeline’s a triumph
The bosses will start to doubt
They’re always first to pout
Users will be banging the door
Look at that row count soar
So, really we’d better pause
They’ll demand to know a root cause
I can’t use this till I’m sure
Can we wait a single batch more?
The dashboards will stink
Maybe they won’t think twice
Their trust will all sink!
No way, they’re all too nice
I wish you knew how
The queue is clearing now
They’ll chew me up
C’mon, it’s barely a hiccup!
I gotta say “no, no, no”
Do you have bugs to show?
Yes, here’s 6 I verified
There you go hurting my pride!
The users should be
Oh boy, here it comes
Proactively notified
We’re in this together, you know?
Well, what do you think we should do?
We simply must go…
Maybe we build from scratch
No, that’s way too slow!
Maybe we test each batch
We’ll toil for days
Then propose some better ways
Well how about this…
And deliver us to data bliss
I read a blog about this thing
Well what value does it bring
Called observability
The thing with the lineage tree?
To set it up is no lift
That would sure be a gift
It tells us when pipelines miss
Now I think I get the gist
We’ll have peace of mind
Maybe I’ll take PTO
We won’t feel behind!
It’s been months on the go
It’s uses ML
Wishing old ways farewell
Bright future I see
Data observability
I’ll set a zoom for today
Your support will carry sway
And slot it in for next sprint
I’ll sketch out an early blueprint
I really can say
I’m excited to ship
Data that’s trustworthy