Barista Sim: LUKE & ELLEN VS CUSTOMERS

[@abydosianchulac2]

Starts at 2:02. Luke didn't sit in the back and cry at any point, so this isn't a realistic food service sim

[@JachAnen]

Thanks my dude

[@namechanged2053]

Luke did indeed cry at 1:02:20 and various other points in the video

[@masonrenne7190]

+

[@abydosianchulac2]

@@namechanged2053 Mmm, not much in the way of crying, but some vague distress I can see

[@akmal94ibrahim]

That's only because he can beat the living cr*p out of the customers. In reality, we can't, so the next best thing is to cry in the back room.

[@MinniMaster]

The mental image of a truck zooming past the cafe I'm in and throwing a package at the front door, followed by my barista running outside the cafe and coming back in with ingredients for the drink I just ordered is absolutely hilarious

[@masonbucior9227]

I keep coming back to watch this. Something about Luke's defeatism and Ellen trying to softly coach him up is really entertaining over and over again

[@frickerjohn]

KZbin is doing the right thing and recommending it again every few months. Couldn't agree more 😂❤

[@jaymulls5426]

It's Luke's dark souls academy

[@s.s.3982]

Ellen distancing herself from this business venture from minute ONE by letting Luke put his name on it is how you know she's taken a marketing course at some point in her life also not sure why "I turned all the electricity off when I was sad" sent me, but oh boy did it ever

[@emmabyrne9274]

I mean she fully has a business degree

[@rosem5062]

55:00 When he beats the first customer in line with a baseball bat, then the next guy just immediately steps forward like "I guess that means I'm next!" I'm home sick from work today, so thank you so much for the laughs.

[@dee...]

I love how Ellen is sweetly and patiently encouraging Luke step by step when his hope and enthusiasm are as depleted as his beans.

[@IntroDuktionZ]

Let us all consider that Luke decided to close the shop after precisely one week of operating. In that time, he took out a predatory loan, assaulted multiple people with a baseball bat, and couldn’t even complete a cappuccino. Well played, sir.

[@dexterpearson8689]

Got a feeling the next time Luke opens another business, he'll go see Marcus Lemonis first!

[@hiatusinc]

Luke: *puts the recipe book on the stove that is on* Also Luke: "Why are there so many fire trucks?"

[@gwts1171]

Mom: "Video Games Journalist?!? Why don't you get a real job - like a barista?" Luke & Ellen: "OK..."

[@teraacc1574]

Porque no los dos mi amigo

[@LightningfistCal]

“That felt like ‘cancelling plans’ good” is such a relatable statement. XD

[@crankycat3026]

This has all the elements of an Outside Xtra stream classic. Oh wow, some bits in this stream really hit me hard, like looking at your bank account and realising you can't afford to pay your bills and loan repayments, then shutting everything down and sleeping for 72 hours straight, waking up to the same reality. Feels so real it hurts.

[@thebpphantom]

Luke: Let's buy some chairs! Me: No Luke! Then they'll STAY!!

[@CodaBlair]

Just like Johnny playing Ravenous Devils and buying a table

[@pinkcowqueen]

@@CodaBlair Exactly what I was thinking!

[@Brasc]

*_"I said, do you have Oat Milk?!"_* _-Ordering Coffee. Simpler. Easier. Loudr._

[@bezerkoid]

*Baby Westaway awakens*

[@markross6817]

"All the money I just made I spent on milk" is such a 2023 statement.

[@ledumpsterfire6474]

He should just be thankful he isn't a baker. Seen the price of eggs lately? lol

[@markross6817]

@@ledumpsterfire6474 if we cross fictional universes, he just needs to get Lionel Spinel from Adventure Skeletons/Oxventure to come over and scream the eggs out of people. :P

[@masondeross]

I hate that I desperately want to play this after watching Luke and Ellen play it. It just looks so satisfying to fill those orders all without having to actually endure the heat, physical fatigue, and emotional distress from customer's yelling at you.

[@AngelBeatYunara]

Barista? I barely knowa. Milk stream froths at 2:02! (The discord is not sorry.)

[@MichaelBrown-tv6qx]

Luke stood outside waiting for his router is me waiting for every single package I’ve ever ordered 😂

[@ledumpsterfire6474]

>Ordered five minutes ago >Checks tracking

[@Retr0Whiskey]

Only gets worse when it gives you however many stops away they are...

[@angstbringer2992]

I worked as a barista for 1 year, a year ago, and I legit had to think twice about whether to watch this because I still get flashbacks 😂 Edit: 1:02:32 when I tell you I *feel* that

[@micahnewby7964]

2:23 it's time to prove...that running a coffee shop is easy Me, having come in in the last 20-30 of the Livestream: oh, hunny, hunny

[@not_a_frog]

43:58 - "I know I'm not doing a great job of running this coffee shop. I'll be the first to admit that." 🤣🤣

[@ryadinstormblessed8308]

16:25 Ellen, thank you for giggling when Luke said "you need to clean my spout" 🤣

[@SmallGreenPlanetoid]

I do like how the same disgruntled customer keeps coming back after Luke whacked him the first time. Some real considerate continuity from the programmers.

[@ThunderRuins]

Luke's descent into madness is the perfect background noise I need after a stress-filled day. I put this on whenever I need a pick-me-up.

[@GriffinWolf]

Had a rough day today, and went from semi-comatose to crying with laughter as Luke batted a guy through the front wall of his coffee shop. Retail might be a nicer experience for workers if they were allowed to use baseball bats when necessary.

[@mediarare2386]

Luke - the man who played Doom with a song on his lips gets crushed by coffee beans and milk.

[@riksweeney]

After watching this stream I have nothing but respect for Baristas, their job must be an absolute nightmare!

[@aimeeg4809]

My parents run a coffee shop and I help out occasionally when they have big events on. I can confirm it's way harder than it looks.

[@oozingtulip1534]

it's a lot more physical of a job than people give credit for, remember to just be nice if they seem like they're "standing around doing nothing" they probably just got done running 13 garbage bags lol

[@aimeeg4809]

@@oozingtulip1534 Yep, and good coffee takes time (about 45 seconds for one espresso shot, any faster and it would be too weak) so people should be patient. I think a lot of people assume baristas just press buttons but you have to know a lot about how to calibrate the grinder and machine to get the best flavour.

[@yennefer440]

Ex barista. Can attest to that.

[@liamross340]

service workers are not paid enough or respected enough in any way shape or form

[@shane5898]

"How ya been keeping? Your hair looks pretty horrible." -Luke "Glad to not be working with the public" Westaway

[@UrvineSpiegel]

12:15 I just instantly pictured Luke and Ellen looking through the window with the "It stare"

[@jonathanhope3672]

Truly hilarious. Ellen’s calm was a perfect foil for Luke’s distress

[@robertwilsonjr.1384]

I love how Luke ultimately just wakes up and chooses violence.

[@Tldk109]

Huh, it's like the sequel to Black Books set in a coffee shop that I never knew I needed.

[@eleanorsmith7152]

Luke, I speak for all of us when I say: thank you for your sacrifice

[@kujakojoe]

Every morning I go through this while half asleep... amazing I've not exploded the espresso machine yet.

[@gamehunter88]

This is everything I had hoped in a barista simulator video from Luke and Ellen.

[@tildessmoo]

I love how this went from actually running a coffee shop to the Paranoia Agent video game.

[@caraelizabeth7307]

This feels like payback for Ellen’s Fear Academy. 😂

[@starminoui]

This is Luke’s Fear Academy: Customer Service Edition

[@stvpett]

There was an indie game a couple of years ago called Coffee Talk. It was a late night coffee shop in a Seattle where there are supernatural creatures in addition to humans. I found it oddly calming and enjoyable. (Note that it apparently takes fantasy creatures to get me interested in being a barista.😅)

[@fallenaasimar3878]

I loved playing Coffee talk, I found it so relaxing, especially since I’d usually play it at night after long stressful days. It was nice getting to meet all the regular customers and hearing how their days went. I was, however, terrible at latte art. 😂

[@kendoyle]

In case you don't know there's a sequel coming this spring.

[@ledumpsterfire6474]

Being a barista fucking sucks, even though it seems like a job that should be fun. But like any other service job, about 1:3 people are assholes, so..

[@mattmott9002]

Review for: Lukes the Diner fromGilmore Girls. 10/10 on the name alone. Every drink was handcrafted and at times learned on the spot. The owner really goes above and beyond for his customers. Even maintaining the shops cleanliness and keeping away the riff-raff with his bat while serving orders.5 stars.

[@nickking2839]

This was like watching the entire arc of the first season of "Severance"

[@neversleep02]

Old ex girlfriend used to ba a barista and the stories I heard! So at the start when Luke said “this is easy, I got this” I smirked and raised an eyebrow. My ex would have laughed herself silly seeing Luke at the end 😅

[@Stoneysilence]

1:09:45 How is your shop not burned down? Your recipe book has been sitting on your hot plate this entire time?!?

[@nightmarethrenody8232]

It’s hot off the press!

[@ledumpsterfire6474]

It's just a gimmick so they can excite customers by saying, "These recipes are HOT."

[@gwishart]

For safety reasons, the recipe book is made from 100% asbestos.

[@yukimurasanada524]

I missed the stream bcoz of work but hilarious and I LOVE IT. I feel like we need more simulations from Luke and Ellen. LOVE you all and Thanks for all you do

[@Gledster]

I agree. I wonder if they've played Viscera: Cleanup Detail? I think they could make that VERY fun. :D

[@dizzyroseblade]

I never thought I'd hear Luke talk about his big milk so much, but 2023 is off to a heck of a start.

[@darryldekeyser]

35:11 perfect time to actually use the newfound bat

[@HobiWan01]

I feel like "Luke's Largely Legal Lattes" would have gone over nicely.

[@jdspetersgaming]

Zak dropped the cigarette out of nervousness seeing Luke with the baseball bat out.

[@reagannikolakakos8358]

I literally just bought this game and I've played it for 3 hours already- its do addicting and satisfying! Seeing that my favorite KZbinrs played I'm so so so exciting and can't wait to watch!

[@holliswilliams8426]

''I'll never order a latté again, I had no idea what an inconvenience it is'' lmao

[@CriticalSooz]

As a real life barista, I feel very seen by Luke crying at too many tasks and getting angry at terrible customers

[@ledumpsterfire6474]

>Tons of jobs opening up in the service industry >Mostly paying minimum wage >Customer is always right policies and mentality >"WHY DOESN'T ANYONE WANT TO WORK?"

[@PhobosDynami]

I wish we could have seen the reviews at the end. A lot of people he was hitting with bats left reviews.

[@LexusLFA554]

The shop sign is so golden xD

[@MarrokDracul]

Having watched this I think you should have called your coffee shop "Luck's Frothing at the Mouth".

[@hollyhartwick3832]

The "explosive lattes" gave me an idea. In The Sims 4, I think I'll make a café and call it "Boom Brew".

[@GeriatricMillennialGamerDude]

This is SO stressful watching Luke try to do this. I'm sorry and thank you for your service, sir.

[@pinkwolf2020]

At 1:12:00 when the woman with the cigarette comes in, it bounces off her head and falls to the floor. Luke's silent rage is comedy gold.

[@redshirtpunk8592]

I worked as a barista for years and I had stress dreams about it that felt EXACTLY like this stream…

[@ledumpsterfire6474]

Baseball bat and all?

[@flytowerstandingby]

58:05 Depleted beans, or as I like to call them, has beans

[@vanillanoxfleuret]

Luke’s passion for chaos is inspirational

[@jerrygonzalez4178]

Things we learned from this stream: -Ellen would make a fantastic manager -Luke has a promising new career in baseball and/or security

[@brandonclay428]

Seeing the fire behind Luke's eyes is the best part of this

[@SamSeedTheShaggyDog]

You should have named the shop Luke’s Warm Coffee.

[@lukasbeck4421]

Latte in German means bar like the one made of wood or metal, but it also is a word for a man's erection. So the name finding process and Luke's explosive lattes had me laughing very hard😂

[@Exile_Whiskey]

The panic in Luke is great. Play Food Truck Sim and have to do 2+ orders at once, while working a grill, fryer, pizza oven and cutting buns, tomatoes and God knows what needing to keep an eye on your gas level. Oh you also have a timer to fill as many orders as you can. Luke, this is calm but I would love to see you do Food Truck Sim

[@babyspace2758]

Watching this as I get ready for my job as a barista... sweet escapism

[@stuartbrann9699]

As a former manager of a Cosa Coffee, this hit so close to home!

[@Jraice]

I like to imagine the NPC behind the tripplio guy saw him got killed and quietly changed his order.

[@Kingkiller_Azoth]

I’m going to play this game then put it on my resume and apply for a general manager position at a coffee shop

[@ledumpsterfire6474]

The only position marginally worse than being a barista in those places is being a manager. Get ready for the "I let my coffee sit and it got cold, make this right" complaints.

[@Kingkiller_Azoth]

@@ledumpsterfire6474 one of my policies will be there will be an easily accessible bat

[@kansei84]

@1:25:44 Absolutely no f's given by Luke XD

[@theduckcompany]

6:33 Of course they cant afford two brooms, all the money went into the holographic street sign!

[@Jade-St28]

Ah yes, the true horror of customer service jobs...the customers

[@ledumpsterfire6474]

The worst in people comes out in force when they're dealing with service workers. Nobody is more petty than a customer.

[@typacsk]

I've worked at a coffee-and-bagel joint for the last four years, and I'd be lying if I said I'd never thought about knifing a customer. (We're outside one of the more heavily trafficked national parks too, so there's the tourist factor to deal with.) Edit: *not* the place in Cody, Wyoming, where the barista dumped hot coffee on a guy who took his dick out while ordering. But that story did make the news here, and it was the subject of much conversation among the staff.

[@DMurphysLore]

What sort of dystopian future does this take place in where a triple shot of espresso costs $90?

[@michaelmarcus509]

Merilwins moon bean 🫘 ☕️

[@sufjams]

How funny. I say the same things at work. I'm at a craft beer and fine wine bar with an espresso machine. "Can we just charge double for coffee during happy hour?" And my friendly customer service face goes immediately into a frown when someone orders something obnoxious. A half calf white chocolate mocha with an extra shot? Yeah... sure.

[@beesforbreakfast]

These games always oddly remind me of playing Minecraft for the first time. I was digging a hole in a mountain and caught myself thinking, “this is actually quite soothing and satisfying! Wonder if there are any jobs like this?…Oh. Wait. Yeah. Mining.”

[@carriethepink1034]

Ahh when luke was talking to 'Carrie' customer I felt like he was talking to me :)

[@katfromthekong414]

Thank god they didn't use "Luke's Grind Shack" ..... the gates of euphemism hell are creaking shut again

[@nightmarethrenody8232]

Grind shack, baby grind shack~

[@katfromthekong414]

@@nightmarethrenody8232 🤣

[@typacsk]

Or "Luke's Pump 'n' Grind"

[@katfromthekong414]

@@typacsk yes that too 🤣

[@melvinkachere8782]

Is it bad that depressed Luke on streams is extremely hilarious 😂😂

[@notthatcreativewithnames]

Would definitely show this stream to my colleagues should they say that they want to just quit the job to open a coffee shop and "chill".

[@Cyrus_T_Laserpunch]

Ellen trying so hard early in the stream to not give away that many of the names Luke was thinking up were also innuendos.

[@domonkoskiraly]

James Hoffmann would have a field day with this.

[@oliversdouglas]

Would be such a good video

[@Borderlines]

Lmao Luke slowly devolced into insanity like all retail employees

[@colemanoke]

The Goodnight Sweetheart reference was a deep cut and i'm here for it

[@zombieham904]

This was beautifully chaotic. Sad I couldn't watch live, but I would LOVE to see more streams/VoDs with this kind of energy :D

[@TsiolkovskySportingLocks]

Absolutely loved this stream but no way I'm ever going to go into a coffee shop again, because there might be a Luke with a lump of 4 by 2

[@MrPJParker1]

You should've called the shop "Luke's Lucious Lattes"! And when Luke ordered the milk frother it unlocked several other coffees, that's why they suddenly appeared in the menu. And at 1:50:00 you gave the customer a mini caramel macchiato when she ordered a small!!!!!

[@codmanout9861]

Wait one gosh darn minute!! $30 for a coffee that only filled 1/8 of a cup!? Highway robbery!!!

[@KayDeeMac]

I understand why Merilwen is the treasurer now

[@typacsk]

Good thing there wasn't a lake out back, to "deposit" money in

[@tzovlask]

Not sure if Ellen is an undercover boss or if Luke is an undercover employee..

[@ginger_cryptid]

When it came to naming, I'm disappointed you didn't go for StarbOX. Not angry, just disappointed.

[@michaelgrafham9570]

I love seeing you both playing games, seeing Ellen laughing makes me laugh, such a great vibe

[@FictionWriter95]

1:59:13 has a real "torch it for the insurance money" vibe

[@Lightning1998JBD]

The milk is usually steamed using a steaming wand which is normally attached to the coffee machine this both heats and froths the milk for the coffees These coffees would all be too cold as the game doesn’t appear to let you heat any milk

[@Lightning1998JBD]

Also fun fact most baristas end up making the same coffee for both late and cappuccino as most people don’t actually know or care that there is a difference Only if they’re serving coffee in super fancy places with glass mugs do they actually have to make them differently I trained to make a latte properly like actually layering it in a glass but in practice I’ve never had to do this while working

[@Lightning1998JBD]

Also also for a triple they’ll likely just use the same coffee grounds by pressing the two shot and then one shot without removing the coffee handle

[@sheridanwilde]

$30 for an espresso? I'm in the wrong business!

[@frodoshaggins]

Very much appreciate Ellen cracking out the Goodnight Sweetheart reference

[@loceelen]

So the most difficult thing about being a barista is that people forget how to use a bin.

[@pinkcowqueen]

57:40 Luke becomes a toddler, and Ellen becomes his exhausted caretaker

[@griffinraynor8425]

this is exactly what being a barista is like. source: was barista for three years.

[@nobledonkey17]

When they play these type of games my anxiety always peaks a bit lol

[@scaryclownproductions-musi7968]

We need more of these two! They’re fantastic

[@javierce8594]

"MANUEL hand coffee grinder"? As a Spanish speaker this confuses me