Being Taken Advantage By Your Own Parent

[@herbwitt7710]

Hi Shay❤.. A table of beautiful ladies 😊 Thanks for sharing. I never realized that was expected like that from the children.

[@reflections_with_Shay]

You are so welcome

[@IanCrouse]

The only way the government can help is to remove my taxes. Then, I can use that money to assist in caring for my mother. That's the extent of government involvement for me.

[@williambreeze2659]

I do like how you ladies aren't relying on having your kids support you in the future. Of course if your sick, old, or disabled that's to be expected. But if your going out of your way to make sure your kids take care you that's messed up. I can't imagine doing the bare minimum and expecting my future kids to pay my way. I should have built up my own life and made theirs easier!

[@brianbaxter3913]

Hi Shay. Great interview. It is very refreshing to see so many Filipina's saying that people should be saving for their retirement and not depend on the children to support them. There was a comment about parents that are in their 40's depending on the children when they are quite capable to work and that is just being lazy. I have seen many Filipino's working well into the 60's and beyond. Most don't make a lot but they are doing their best to survive. Financial planning is something banks have been doing in the west for a very long time. So it should be the banks education people more than the government. Most western countries have retirement pensions for retired people. I have heard that is the case here but not a big pension. Maybe the government could help in that direction for those who stuggle. Learning how to save instead of spending your whole pay once you get it will save a lot of grief for people. I understand it is part of the culture but giving to your parents should be something you volunteer to do not be obligated to do. Most in the west don't rely on their children but some will help their parents when help is needed. Keep smiling and stay safe

[@reflections_with_Shay]

So true Brian! Thank you!

[@Jerry92128]

Excellent video. Basic financial education is also needed in the United States public school system. Many Americans (young and old) like to use plastic instead of cash, not realizing they actually have to pay the credit card companies usually with an interest rate of 24% annual or more.

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Thank you Jerry!

[@stevengonyaw1617]

These girls speak very good English !

[@davidkarl5192]

how intelligent and capable the 3 of you are, you are already changing culture just by talking about it. bravo ladies. so many good points were spoken in this video

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Thank you for this thoughtful comment David! 😌

[@Revfredtravels]

Wow, thank you Shay for the fantastic content as a man who wants to move to the Philippine and find himself a Beautiful/Wonderful/Intelligent woman Like yourself. It is good information for me to have to know how to start conversations.

[@Brian-Future]

Sign of the times..generations are changing, and modern thinking. Parents today are instilling in the next generation this new mindset. Change takes time, resistance fades.. and traditions adjust. Great video!

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Thank you so much!

[@dwaynekeith156]

Number 1 is for everyone in a family to have a work ethic .

[@reflections_with_Shay]

😌

[@marcprobin1659]

Sorry to hear that you have so many problems with your mom Maya! You are right, you don't have to support, especially if they try to make you feel guilty

[@ianshields-ml6sl]

well spoken ladies you are very sensible as well as beautiful love you all xx🤔🤔🤔🌹🌹🌹

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Thank you so much Ian! 😌

[@philipmasie]

Good 😊 video Shay and important message! ❤

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Thank you Philip!

[@jspice-kl2wc]

Great video packed with some priceless information, also you can lead by example, the kids will see you. Thank you.

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Exactly Joe! We teach by example.

[@miketrahan777]

Another good video, topic Shay, Salamat.😊💓👍🙏🌟

[@__Craig__]

Such meaningful and mindful dialog. Thank you all.

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Glad you enjoyed it, Craig!

[@expatguideph]

Thank you sooo much Shay for having us

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Thank you Leah! I really appreciate you all! 😌

[@RobertG.Wishing_you_Good_Karma]

Hello ladies, looking great

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Thank you Robert 😌

[@beatmueller5119]

Thanks for this interesting educational video. But keep in mind , your parents Hadn’t had the same education and possibilities as you have now and hopefully your kids too. 👍👍👍🤞🤞🤞👏🇨🇭

[@garyjohn]

Good morning Shay from Edina, Minnesota USA very early there. Family first (one of the many things I like about the Philippines).

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Good morning Gary!

[@Jerry92128]

I volunteer my services to teach those classes in the Philippines. Just cover my travel and lodging costs. 😊

[@reflections_with_Shay]

That's great Jerry!

[@marcprobin1659]

Sexual and financing education should be a must, and this how the government can help for sure!

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Yes, education! 😌

[@rorybellamy2533]

parents in former times suffered hard times and poverty and no opportunity except to work work work, Times and Minds are changing with a change in improved circumstances, i love to see Shay put a roof on the house of the peanut brittle man. Kind care will continue to be needed during the changing, Jesus said "You will always have the poor with you " if a person smokes cigarettes they must have money to burn, when they quit harmful habits then we can share some help.

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Thank you Rory! So happy some of you remember Elmer! 😌

[@bg2244]

There is no secret, to have more solidarity at the national level, we need more taxes. As a Frenchman, the problem of financial support is the responsibility of my government. As a Frenchman, it is the system of my country to tax heavily (the biggest taxer among rich countries) and to redistribute. The first problem comes from multinationals or billionaires who avoid taxes because of countries offering lower tax levels. Even within my country, the least educated people do not understand that national solidarity must be financed. Strong solidarity leads to abuse and here again the least educated do not understand that limits must be set. The second problem comes from foreigners. It is not normal to pay 1 billion to treat illegal immigrants for free, nor to have an additional 1 billion in unpaid bills in our hospitals due to foreigners. It is not normal to have lots of foreigners in our prisons or psychiatric hospitals. If some foreigners bring in money, the number of parasites is significant and foreign countries refuse to take back the undesirables: it is an enormous financial burden. 75% of asylum seekers make unfounded requests. Through these two problems, globalization is gradually killing the French model of national solidarity. We need laws at the global level, we need to force the most liberal countries to finance at least their own national solidarity without compromising that of others.

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Thank you!

[@coffeebotography]

Maybe some social services will help

[@IanCrouse]

Shay, what is the brand of the center camera? Is it a filter that gives it a more subdued image?

[@reflections_with_Shay]

It's Sony EV, Ian. I color graded the footage so it looks darker.

[@MichaelBuck]

FYI: Incorrect Links in BIO, missing "@", here are the corrections: Maya - www.youtube.com/@MayaLifeInThePhilippines Leah - www.youtube.com/@expatguideph

[@coffeebotography]

I’ve been teaching my gf how to invest

[@frank5436]

I'm a firm believer that if you GIVE a person a fish you feed them for a day. If you TEACH a person to fish you feed them for life. 😮

[@reflections_with_Shay]

😌

[@albraun-sq6rg]

This is a very important conversation between 3 beautiful and wise young women. It’s great that you all recognize that your children should be able to have their own lives. You were responsible for them, but they are responsible for their own lives, not yours. But the government should have a SS program so that seniors can be able to retire. I remember Elmer and his wife who Shay and her team built the roof for. I think they were 75 and they are so poor that they would never be able to retire. A SS program based on income levels would solve a lot of that. Thank you all for having the courage to talk about this so openly.

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Exactly Al. The elderly deserve better. Thank you for this thoughtful comment! 😌

[@frosty3693]

My comments are based on my little knowledge and experiance. I know the poverty in the Philippines is a big issue of which I know little. There is no offense meant in anything I wrote. It is very hard to not let my own experiance and condition color my views and assumptions. There may be a difference between helping your parents and being exploited by them. Even in the USA, many decades ago (the great drepression years especially) children worked to support the family. And even today when the parents get old the children help with their care, if they can. (elder care can be very expensive in the US so, depending on the children's situation, it can be better if the children do that.) It is best not to look for the government to help. They will look after themselves and waste money and often make the problem worse. Do not expect the government to teach about finances. If they did too many people would look at government finances and see how poorly they are looking after the people's intrests. If parents have any influence with the schools individual economics should be taught. (the higher economics can become more political indoctrination than useful) The culture of spending what you have a let tomorrow take care of itself needs to be changed, but difficult when you barely make enought to feed yourself and family. (I hear many expats get into agruments with their filipinas over that, though filipina frugality is legendary) Maybe the government needs to have better ways for it's people to save and invest their money where it is more profitable. A modern investment system, an example in the US is the Vanguard (not the only one just the biggest)online investments where people can invest in stock, bonds and other things as part of a group. Something geared for very small amounts. You say the Philippines does not teach children/young people how to money works, how to budjet, how to save and stay out of debt. This is a huge problem in the USA young people, and older people too, have no idea how money works, particularly debt and credit. (look at the student loan scandals) A book of amortization tables is a valuable tool to see the cost of debt. (it is a boring read as a literary work but can be scary) But I don't think there is much credit avilability there. Many problems are linked to the economy of the country and the population can form culture. An an advisor (Peter Zeihan) keeps talking about the world demographic colapse (with some exceptions) is linked to industrial development, urbanization and modernization. I hope, the Philippines is developing, in a good way, so that increased economic growth will spread in the islands and things learned by other nations will lead to fewer mistakes being made. Maybe I should have put this at the top. You say parents should not exploit their children and maybe goverment can help. I suggest looking into what some say the US government has done to the children in the US. Not individually but as a whole. By increasing government debt turning government savings/retirement programs (Social Security) into ponzi schemes and other programs they may have robbed the children of the future just as surely as the bad parents there but they will not see the results for years. I am by no means an expert in money Just someone who has been lucky and can live within my means. You ladies have benefited from the internet and a world economy not possible some years ago. I wish you continued success.

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Thank you for your thoughtful comment!

[@gotaplay]

There is no real answer here I think Everything depends on so many factors . all three of you ladies have unique experiences , support comes from love I think hard to budget when your eating only rice and salt ...

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Yes Paul!

[@sillybilly8028]

I thought it was a law in Ph that you had to take care of your parents?

[@lanec5672]

That was my impression as well.. probably selectively enforced, if enforced at all.

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Yes, there is a family code law, but it's usually not enforced.

[@FilCanGil]

Maya is correct, teaching finance to children at a young age will provide great benefits for their future. If you have a loving Mother, the bond between you will be inseparable and you would consider it an honour to help her in her old age. If you have a Mother that’s controlling, manipulative and likes to play mind games, then you may not be as willing to have anything to do with her. If she wields her money like a weapon (according to my ex-wife) then no one would want to be around her……I digress. The moral of this ranting is, be kind to your kids, develop a long lasting and loving relationship with them and everything else should fall into place🙏🏼

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Thank you for this comment!

[@aaronkirwan1547]

You wonderful ladies live in a culture that was unfortunately corrupted by American capitalism during WWII. Politicians simply want more for themselves, and less for their people. Check on Skid Row in Los Angeles, USA, and you will see that America is just as impoverished as the Philippines. As a citizen of the USA, I hate the fact that we have the resources to help these people, yet our government chooses to allocate billions of dollars on other useless projects. We, as a people also have an unwritten "obligation" to provide for our parents when they age. I commend you wonderful ladies for realizing the problem, and taking strides to make your children stronger and better, by teaching them the virtues of financial responsibility.

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Thank you so much Aaron for such a thoughtful comment!

[@Gregory-keror]

To solve this issue there's alot of things that need to be taken into consideration.first the out of control teenage pregnancy. That needs to be considered. Then like shay said able body persons who can go out and get a job. Because no matter how you try to deny it. It's gonna affect your life in more ways than one.like for instance a man who comes into your life who's financial responsible that should be a bonus. Not him coming in and before you know it he has to shoulder responsibility of taking care of your family. If your together you should be his priority and the future and any kids your gonna have. Not your family been a financial burning. And parents need to learn that your kids isn't supposed to be your retirement plan. If that's your purpose for having kids then your sadly mistaking and that's selfish

[@reflections_with_Shay]

Thank you for watching!