Police Interceptor - What Made Me Reach My BREAKING POINT?

[@loopyloujuggler]

I haven't encountered anything like the horrific things that you have, but I can completely relate with what you were saying at the end. I'm in a very stressful relationship with a narcissist, who's, over time, managed to imprint those same narcissistic traits into my teenager. Life is very draining. My rucksack is overflowing. Most days I feel exhausted, unmotivated, I don't sleep well, I don't eat properly. I've got no interest in socialising (I used to be very sociable), and I constantly doubt myself. The last 20yrs I've been belittled, taken for granted, unappreciated, manipulated, lied to, and verbally abused, by my partner and my child. I'm barely holding things together. Your explanations and analogies really help - as it shows me that I'm not going mad - and that my lack of memory, problems getting my words out, saying the wrong things, clumsiness, etc are probably all down to the stress I'm under at home.

[@danpaul4975]

In most jobs you're just a statistic, a name on a piece of paper and completely dispensable. Organisations claim to have a "duty of care" but no matter what happens they want you to be better to do the job, rather than better because they care. While we're paid to do stuff it matters to be told in words by superiors that you're valued for your work.

[@miamiglia]

Couldn’t agree more 👌👍

[@theotheo6587]

Unfortunately a few bad apples

[@tobypickering921]

My story is literally 99% same as yours Ben, 16 years service and earlier this year I was diagnosed with complex PTSD. I was in a right mess and if it wasn't for my wife and daughter I wouldn't be here. My Occupational Health department and senior management were all crap, I was put under pressure on numerous occasions to come back to work. They had no understanding of what I was going through, and it felt like they couldn't care less. I have a light at the end of the tunnel now, as yesterday I passed my class 1 HGV test and already have a new job to go to. I handed in my notice earlier today and said the reason for leaving was because the organisation had let me down. No body from senior management contacted me! So that's it. . I'm off. I take comfort in your channel knowing that I'm not alone, and for that I thank you for being so open and honest, it really does help.

[@MB-wk5lc]

Toby I am so sorry you got such shit “support”. I hope your CPTSD reduces over time. It is horrible and such an invisible pain. the hostility the police get is so cruel I think it forms a huge part of why so many officers get traumatised. Please know many people are massively grateful for the countless times you put others first and many will wish you peace and happiness and in time I truly hope you get this.

[@tobypickering921]

@@MB-wk5lc thanks M B for your kind words, it is very much appreciated. I'm on the long road to 'recovery ' but I am feeling positive about the future now, really looking forward to my new job, leading a normal life and having more time with family!

[@barneypaws4883]

I work for the civil service and they are the same. When you're off sick it's "when are you coming back", they want you to come back to work. I've had mental health problems with regards to work. I lost it one day in the house, I was so upset I sat down crying then I started throwing up. My problems were both home and work issue's, I was off work for a few months suffering from depression and my work gave me the opportunity to change my job. The best move I made. I still have issue's with depression and anxiety but I am in control of it with medication thank God. I never thought I would ever suffer from mental health problems but I know it's nothing to be ashamed of and talking really helps. I agree with what you say, I come first not my job

[@MalcolmCrabbe]

Ben, you are truly an ambassador for enlightening people on the subject of mental health. I've had two big mental breakdowns, the first was in front of my GP as I wanted to know why I was shaking so much and felt so anxious over a situation I found my self in. The sub-conscious worrying over what may happen caused that switch to go... the second time funny enough was whilst been assessed for ESA following a leg injury (my lovely ex employer terminated the contract because the hospital signed me off work - like you there was no real compassion from my employer). I've been at a station at 2am waiting for a freight train to help me end things.... something pulled me back - as it did you... like you, medication helps...but so does talking, and the fact you are talking to us through the channel helps... we're here for you, and listening to your stories helps make people more aware of mental health issues. Stay strong Ben, apparently time is a good healer

[@maxcullen3427]

Great comment hope I getting through it

[@violettheorgangrinder]

No one cares

[@Yxnglz49]

@@violettheorgangrinder whos laughing

[@justwannaridemabike]

5:33 STOP RIGHT THERE! You DO still help people. These videos DO help people. They are excellent for bringing awareness to mental health issues and you are an ambassador to for mental health. Don’t stop.

[@armpitfuzz]

We all have a breaking point, for some it changes on a daily basis. So glad Ben has his family and others support to see him through.

[@01cthompson]

I have said this before in comments on your videos. But, I still have to say thank you for writing your first book. It helped me immensely seeing that someone else had experienced the same feelings I have in the past.

[@venusadventures66]

Hi Ben am currently watching you on 5action dealing with drunk dad who assaulted wife on motorway and left her on hard shoulder. In you summing up of things I saw the hurt in your face for the children . I needed to say I've got Immense respect for you and what you dealt with in your job . Well done buddy

[@richardcasado6107]

so glad you can talk about it so many people are at breaking point proud of you for being a voice

[@novaadventures5758]

Totally get this I broke and stripped myself to the core to start my recovery. I nearly hung my self but some switch flicked the other way. I always talk to people about you and use your backpack analogy. It’s great knowing we aren’t alone in this and I’m medication free now, talk about things more, share my story on social media and thank all those that helped me

[@mariagunnarsQ17]

My kids are the only thing that have kept me here too, I feel what you are saying 100% Thank you for being an amazing male role model.

[@DmitryLivchak]

Thank you so much for all your openness and support. I've even struggling depression and anxiety for years. It takes courage to step forward and speak like you do. Myself being an IT leader, you've inspired me to do the same for myself, my colleagues and my team. Thank you, man!

[@rickschell7874]

Another good one Ben. As a person that has panic and anxiety attacks, I see where your coming from. Keep fighting everyday. I do.

[@stendecstretcher5678]

I hear you. I did 35 years as an ambo. Retired two years ago. Apart from my bad back I'm ok.

[@hannahsmithy9750]

you are doing so well you have nothing to be ashamed off you seem like a nice guy who is trying his best you are an inspiration

[@jimg492]

Ben I don't comment on vids often but I just wanted to say, hats off to you! I'm proud of you for what you have done and continue to do. Keep it up 👍

[@TestGearJunkie.]

I can't compare my situation to yours Ben, but I've been very depressed before in my life and I'm still not 100% back from it, I don't suppose I ever will be. I'm on a minor dose of medication, but the one thing that keeps me going is the love of my partner, she is absolutely amazing and I couldn't live for a moment if she weren't by my side 🥰

[@carlrobson5745]

Been that person to break never thought I would yep thiniking I was a failure not necessarly the job but the people around you dragging you under water with lead boots. Thanks for thos vlog Ben.

[@jannybroekman-vanheiningen85]

How honest can you be, how vulnerbable, it is the way it is, and it's awful. Every day is a survival, that's how it feels and that's how it is. And yet i tell you dear Ben, you have helped so many people with your books, your video's, merchandising and so on. May i say, that i find you a wonderful man. And i wish you so much love and please, be proud!!!👊🙏💪

[@NDWMONEY]

Never let work get to you.....it's just a job...if you don't do it then someone else will.....always put yourself first !!

[@BiGjD20]

Absolute massive respect to you. I was in West Yorks 09-14 and I did see you knocking round, although we never spoke. I moved to another force before coming out Jan this year. I can echo many of your observations. You have clearly worked through so very much and I sincerely hope you feel a massive sense of pride for getting to the stage you are at now. Just know the vast majority of people appreciate your service and sacrifice. Fair play to you mate, I wish you the very best

[@bouncycastles1214]

Ben could you do a video on interceptor training you went through? Where was it held, on the public road? How do you catch significantly more powerful cars etc?

[@jemmmmyeah]

Something a lot of people don’t talk about/understand with mental health and medicine is those side effects you mentioned at the end. Constantly lethargic and tired, the no memory is the worst thing; I’ve been mid sentence and forgotten what I was talking about as I’m talking about it. Your brain can’t (as you’d say) work for toffee. This series is so important Ben, you are such an amazing guy. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about your video from a few weeks ago about the role of police nowadays, how they are more like social workers, rarely have the opportunity to actually deal with crime because of all the other bollox you have to do. You, your team and any member of the police force have my utmost respect and if I ever hear someone calling a police officer pig or whatever, i’ma shout at them!

[@JackAaronOestergaardChurchill]

So so so much respect. I can’t begin to imagine now tough it would be in those depths without knowing what is happening, but being able to look back and pick it apart for what it was is totally amazing. Big love and respect

[@donnajohnson8035]

Totally understand the mental exhaustion, social anxiety, not being able to think. It’s a tough daily battle. Take care x

[@wendybrindleystokes5050]

Total respect Ben, I think it’s true that those of us with these mental health issues hit a wall💥. Bang and everything and everyone can just eff off. You fall down a sink hole and don’t care if you can get out. There is only so much that we can all deal with and you were bombarded with shit after shit. I feel so sad that the police get no respect anymore, especially for all that you do to help and protect us. The world we live in seems to have no respect for anyone let alone the police. It’s so good that you can express yourself and help others going through the same thing. Keep smiling, keep talking and thank you 🙏 ❤

[@OwenB98]

Keep up the videos ben, love watching. Looking forward to this episode, keep moving forward you're an inspiration to so many!

[@CJsGamingAndLife]

Ben, I've been there in my own mind about 6 years ago, This is brilliant that you can speak freely about it in public. I saw no way out and I did hide from the world for roughly a month, hard to say exact as it's just a bit of a blur. Mine stems from a neglected upbringing and being made homeless at 16, when I was running with the problem I was fine, but as soon as I became settled to a regular life it all came to me at once and it took me years to learn the balance of life and medication. Keep going mate, you're doing great 👍👍

[@DianeSmith67]

Thank you ! ive never known anyone who has said it all perfectly as you just did ! its hard to think 5 minutes ahead when you cant think at all, and with no friends or family to help and no funds for medical help some are stuck out and end up in very bad places and its not our fault, we simply cant get the help we need, you are loved Ben by more people than you know, are you perfect? no but noone is ! you are you and you stand for whats right and you help people in more ways than you know, im in tears now because someone "you" has said perfectly how i feel and what im going through when noone else gives a damn.

[@PieMan001]

Thank you Ben for your openness and honesty. Hopefully there are people that view your videos, who can now see that it is ok to talk about mental health and not hold everything inside. There are people who can help and they don’t have to face what they’re going through alone!!!

[@clairehill408]

You deserve the very best in life, some of us feel you did a fantastic job with so little thanks. Glad you are making a new life and being with your family. Much love from oz

[@atlantaaxo8126]

You are truly amazing. I can sympathise with you on medication. Even 3 days without my tablets I feel like I’m back to square one again. Luckily I’m back on them and got them back into my system. Your videos are amazing honestly. Your amazing. Never give up on being you

[@sandocheese45]

Take my hat off to you Ben Sir, respect mate. I'd like to shake your hand ✋ 👍🥇

[@elliotttalksf1825]

Loved Ben in interceptors and love him on KZbin. Such a great person.

[@dravengraves86]

Thankyou for your service and dedication and I'm sorry you had to go through horrible things. Wish you all the love, health and happiness 🌹

[@lucythemoggy1970]

sorry to hear you got to that point ben, but i'm glad your still here with us, proud of us buddy x

[@TheRealXira]

Love you Ben, You give me some strength to be a better version of myself. Take care n be safe Brother. 🫂❤

[@danielmarshall4587]

Glad you are here now and telling us about this... piss pour you went through what you went through. HOWEVER may you continue with this message, hopefully people are listening. All the best and as always THANK YOU.

[@GeorgeThoughts]

As someone struggling with anxiety in my job as a videographer right now, but secretly nursing a huuuuge desire to join the Police, hearing these stories from officers. Important, critical, authentic, brave stories from the job. I must admit it keeps me in two minds about wanting to join. All I ever hear are negative stories about the Job and working life. And i'm not critisising the officers or Ben here, it's so important we are candid and open about the truth of the job. But yeah, why should I leave my higher paying office job, however boring it is, to join the Police and be paid less to be attacked and ignored by everyone until I have a breakdown and quit?

[@lucythemoggy1970]

ben ur an amazing man to be upfront and honest about ur struggles. keep at it mate, super humbled by you fella

[@josephwillis7587]

The strongest people express their emotions. You are doing awesome Ben, I bet you’re family are very proud of you and so are the fans. Keep going, it’s a long road but there’s always light at the end of the tunnel 👍

[@shanebarnett2530]

I agree with you fella it's a hard world be we need to plod on

[@heidicash4772]

Love u Ben ,so honest about your mental health .your right people don't see you when your at your worst feeling absolutely crap,just because someone looks alright doesnt mean they aint suffering inside ,I've suffered with mental health since i was 19 in now 47 on and off meds all my life ,recently back on Sertraline for my anxiety ,doing ok but like yourself i have the odd day here and there where i cry ,i know i will get there. Wishing you all the best x

[@billsinwillson7438]

One of the hardest jobs to do.. mentally.. Thanks for ya service Ben 💚.

[@techtitanuk5609]

You were my favourite copper and people love you and your messages.

[@jackfindleton1162]

high five ben,,, i know how it feels i am all those symptons i have those now ,,, your wonderful hounest guy ,, certainly a credit to the police force stay cool dude 😊

[@PhilsWorkshop1953]

That was one of the most honest videos I’ve ever seen

[@emmadudley-smith6165]

Thank you for speaking out about mental health ❤ I wish you the best xxx

[@vickitaylor2065]

I know the ‘switch’ you’re talking about. I hate it when people say ‘it’s for attention.’ I tried to take my own life in 2014 and I can’t tell you how scary that switch is and how quickly it can happen. I remember just wanting the pain and upset to stop. Thankfully I’m here, I survived. I will reiterate what you have said, please talk. To anyone. It helps massively ❤

[@W0LFscot]

Hi Ben had a comment or two on a couple of videos of yours now and having dealt with some issues in the past on what you have went through, thank you so much for making it more well known cause as you said a person can only take so much before anough is enough and you begin to break and that is one of the reasons i still watch what you put on there from day to day because you keep fighting no matter what and you keep projecting strength and thank you for that, i really wanna get in the job with Police Scotland and your stories have really made me sit back and think is this definitely the same job i thought it was going to be when i was 16/17 about 4 years ago. thank you so much m8 keep strong and keep going, love from Scotland :)

[@joemorris4275]

The most genuine video . Thank you for sharing Ben .

[@hannah50353]

Well done, Ben ❤ You did a Sterling job in the police, but your life always comes first. You are resilience personified 🏆

[@thebaldone7453]

I got to the last stage of the interview process and I didn't study for it because I had last minute doubts whether I wanted it or not. I ended up not passing the last stage but listening to this; I wouldn't have been a great fit.

[@Bella_Deer7504]

Have alot love and appreciation for Ben

[@The.Doctor.149]

Very brave, and very true words Ben. One step at a time my friend - you’re far from alone, and have come so far already - but don’t feel obligated to this new role - you decide what your priorities are now; you owe nobody anything except what *you* decide - all the best brother. 😉💙

[@northernninjarunner5506]

Great evening at Skipton last night. Mrs Miggins is very proud of you big hugs mate 👊

[@BenPearson1965]

Cheers pal

[@notrab]

Massive respect for you Ben. Love listening to what you have to say ❤

[@beesnestna9544]

I'm retired PD (25+ years on the job) formerly from a small town in the state of New Jersey (USA). I hear quite a number of similarities between your overall experiences with the job and my own. I'm retired almost 11 years now, having retired a little early after suffering physical injuries while trying to wrestle handcuffs onto a suspect. Most all cops (assuredly) will suffer from PTSD for the rest of their lives, though most will go undiagnosed. The problem here in the USA is that we carry guns, and a PTSD diagnosis is almost a sure ticket out of a law enforcement job, since it means you cannot be issued a firearm and without a firearm you cannot safely perform your duties. Maybe big cities are a bit different, but the department I worked at would've certainly confiscated my firearm until (if ever) I would be deemed fit to return to duty. Hence, most of us here go undiagnosed and untreated. I know I have most of the symptoms myself, so I deal with it. I just discovered your channel, so I think I'll end up being a regular. That being said, I'll "Like" every video (after all, you're a cop) but I generally don't subscribe to any channels due to my email setup. Question: Do you feel like you cannot trust, or talk to, anyone anymore unless they're a cop? Maybe it's just me, but that's the point I've reached. Oh, I'll make general small talk with members of the public, but I don't socialize with anyone who hasn't done the same job. Peace brother. Cops are cops the world over.🕊👮‍♂

[@eddiewism]

Hi Ben. I was a special with wyp… worked worked with you a couple of times our of Bradford…… Agree with you fully!

[@craystonj]

Incredible honesty. Thank you very much for sharing!

[@jamesa6720]

Sending much love from a fellow sufferer.

[@maxcullen3427]

Major respect too you Ben defo been through it the way u champion MENTAL HEALTH is great thank best for future 🚔

[@Simon-ui6db]

Having been on the wrong side of the law back in the day, one thing I NEVER did was slag off a cop. If they nicked me I was polite, did as asked, and talked to them (mainly met) with respect. But hearing people who just give police shit for having a bite to eat when on shift wtf!! How would they like it?! Thanks for the videos Ben, I know how bad mental health is personally with 3 suicide attempts. I hope there are loads of serving officers who see all these videos and seek help before it gets too much for them.

[@spaced270]

Keep going Ben. You're an inspiration

[@Smartsparky]

I really feel for you, seriously. I hope this video reaches millions of people who think it’s ok to abuse a police officer. It disgusts me every time I see it happen on a street. The government has caused this, absolutely no respect whatsoever these days and no decent punishment.

[@alatchford]

Hi Ben love the videos, I went through a similar ish thing while at a completely different job (not police) but it got to the point where I was feeling ill and run down and not right and after months went to the doctor and was diagnosed with depression and was prescribed medication but decided at that point to not get the prescription and to change job and leave what was causing the issues and have been so much happier ever since, for anyone going through a similar thing go and see a medical professional and if you can change the situation you are in do it.

[@baff6923]

Ben I could relate to what you're saying was in the same situation myself I was in a very dark place my partner phoned me at work saying I've got a doctors appointment for you after work she met me at doctors. When I went through to see the doctor I just cried my eyes out couldn't even speak everything she told the doctor wasn't me I just wanted to curl up in a ball. She saved me my best friend 💓

[@Jon_Doh]

1 Day at a time ben. Thats all you can do. God bless you for saying it as it is.

[@Life_Of_AL]

It’s awful how bad it gets before you do eventually snap. I’ve had times before where I’ve felt my mind had gone but nothing prepared me for how much of a turn it took in July. It just went and all I wanted to do was drive as far away as possible and end it. Just didn’t care, felt that I had lost everything and nothing mattered anymore. Kids, wife, work, family…..didn’t even register anymore. Employer was(is) a FTSE 100 company, proclaim to care about their staff but it made everything 10x worse. The way they treated me is what tipped me over the edge and ultimately resulted in an attempt on my life.

[@mrpeterson1481]

It might sound wrong to some people but like a lot of people i learnt the hard way to put my mental and physical health before any job. I have no loyalty to a job and if it comes to it i will just walk. They will replace you tommorow if needed. Your loved ones can never replace you.

[@daihatsudave6332]

What a video . Keep pushing through !!!!!!!

[@sodp]

Thanks so much Ben so open and vulnerable, jings

[@BipoIarbear]

Every video u make confirms you are a hero more an more let's call you "captain A650"

[@lindaramage3090]

Been a sub since beginning, read your first book. Your insight is inspiring. Thank you.

[@STEVIEBHOY]

"Baby Ben" always cracks me up 🤣

[@deanstockton-beesley3835]

Iv been through the exact same Ben, obviously different circumstances but I felt the exact same, sadly I took it abit further and tried to commit suicide but its 2 years later now my wife and kids keep me going and therapy and medication keep me sane. Keep doing what your doing, love the channel.

[@willrickards413]

Cracking video Ben, wishing you all the best mate😊

[@Kevxmed]

You did great work Ben thank you for your service!! Love you

[@imaner76]

Well done Ben. Thanks.

[@DavidHh1969]

Every chief on down to the local bobby should listen to this.

[@edwoodcostin]

Well done Ben

[@SkynetDrone12]

Keep up the good fight mate

[@UmvimvaniT]

I look forward to every episode. This must have been a little of a hard one to relate.

[@marchynds1445]

You've succeeded because you wanted too Ben. I've said before it takes everything to pick yourself up. Keep pushing. Health is wealth bud.

[@JellyLancelot]

Love ya Ben, thanks for the vids!

[@Rockhopper1]

Post Traumatic Growth, get yourself to Hidden Valley Bushcraft, tell Nick I sent you. He and I have been through exactly the same as you, I think he can help you, not cure you. Its time away and time well spent. There is a way back, and there is light at the end of the tunnel. My breakdown was in 2015, slowly catching up again with life. Please look after yourself and you are not alone, Rich.

[@sean-wh3it]

And the spineless seniors with the you do what you think is right attitude who wouldn't dream of backing you

[@la-saint1798]

Such an honest vid.

[@Ztandard32]

Well said.

[@RamsayGamer02]

Love the video

[@islam-ui8bc]

God bless u health wisdom tranquillity happiness 💕💕💕

[@natnisanijchin7477]

please react Reno 911! the funniest cop series ever. It would cheer you up. Love You Ben

[@jasonmarkwell7820]

How you help people with mental health issues. X

[@DARKSLIDEHLL]

ey up. will you ever do any shout outs? id quite like one if ya do lol

[@Adventures_with_Sog]

Brother 🤜🤛💚

[@lightfoot.2000]

😑🙏💖💕 from New Zealand ✌😎

[@theotheo6587]

Sorry!!!!! As I was writing I went to live and work in England,,,,,, I got a job in a restaurant. We had a lot of police coming for coffee and some times a snack (this was before they had patrol cars ) They were days we had 3,,,,,4at one time in the back when it rained it was like a police station One night we had one who spent his sfitt eating and drinking coffee,,,,,, when it was time to go in he went outback and gave the owner a parking ticket So when an other cop came the owner told him about the ticket and asked him to go

[@Stylishman3378]

Nice one Ben. So I take it you got ill health retired it being ptsd?

[@gingeginge6435]

My mental health problems and yours ain’t the same but I think I sort of get what you’re on about but I keep myself here to care for the people who need me I’ve got my mates in Ubers and I’ve cooked my mate a stake put him to bed and I’m finishing my other mates beer then a baby Guinness as a night cap then bed for me lol love the content keep it up love the content your a lovely man I’m 24 so our stages of life aren’t the same but I’m at a turning point in my life let the young lads know they have a choice even if there 30 or whatever they can make the hard decisions if they need too I’ve almost committed self die at 11 and 19 and there’s a gole for everyone you just need to find it and figure out how to get there and make a plan to achieve your gole and workout the steps to get there and make a plan love you your a honist mah and I appreciate your message keep it up and they’ll baby Ben he’s got it too I see a bit of myself in him as wired as that sounds cos I was on the other side of the law as you and him but still I’m getting myself in the right palace so as I said love the content and I see your point of view love the channel hope you’re ok now and doing right bye your mrs kids and family ❤