Betraying Yourself?

[@m.sunday3852]

It's such a good character trait when you are able to change your views after being presented new information!

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

Absolutely! That applies to so many things in life and you can really grow so much and learn more about the world and yourself if you allow it to happen. Thank you so much for watching!

[@ItsRadishTime]

This is me, about everything, about every six months. Probably the most notable example is that I started my channel as an art channel. I did time-lapse drawings (they were awful and all privated now) but I had all these grand plans for an Art Channel and then 3 or 4 other different things before i landed on the stuff I do now.

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

ItsRadishTime It's so interesting how what we want to do changes with what we enjoy for sure!

[@SuperSamStuff]

*This rocks.* Seriously! I wanted to talk about these ideas a little more, but honestly I don't think I need to. You hit the nail on the head. Part of changing and growing is not being resistant to losing things that you thought defined you. That's something I'm still certainly learning myself, and it's great to see other people talking about it. We assign ourselves identities on here quite quickly, which isn't necessarily a bad thing, but it's important to be honest about our own fluidity. Thanks again (also shout out to video responses one time)

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

Thank you so much Sam! That means a lot! Yeah I think it's so easily done on KZbin for sure, especially when you try and brand yourself and realise it doesn't fit anymore. A great example of that is Louise Pentland who broke out of the old mould she had for herself and accepted the change and allowed the space it deserved. We're always learning more for sure because our attachment to different things is always slightly different and what it means to let it go is different too. You're most welcome! It was my pleasure :D

[@GemmaYM]

I feel like this kind of works with people too. Like, I was so used to having my select group of friends, they were safe, secure and familiar. My first year of university, I was afraid of socialising for a few reasons, one of them being that I wouldn't find friends like the ones back home. But, now I'm in my second year and I've met so many wonderful people who are so astonishingly different from my home friends. We talk about different things and find other things relatable, especially since I'm studying film, I've found people I can talk about it passionately with without sounding snobbish or overtly passionate, because we think about it in a similar way! So, yes! Embrace changes and remember that there are often new and better things out there!

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

This is completely and utterly fantastic Gemma! I have to say I think I reacted in much a similar way and it can be astonishing who you find yourself getting along with at university. For me, I think uni has taught me to break barriers between who *I* think I can and can't be friends with, particularly because I wasn't that close to people outside of my friendship group at high school. But it's so brilliant to be able to talk passionately about topics that you love and not fear making the other person feel small. Thank you so much for sharing this insight, it's so awesome to see the topic resonates with other people!

[@CuriouslyJustMegan]

Ayyyy! This was lovely, and I genially jumped thinking the sirens in the video were outside my window :) I feel like I'd heavily associate this feeling of 'betraying myself' to movies and books I put on pedestals when I was younger, and this includes the likes of Twilight, Hush Hush series, About Time and more. I liked them at the time as they were good stories and fun stories. I appreciated them for their random escapism qualities, but now I nostalgically link them to my development. I see multiple problems or issues within them, that make me turn away (but still enjoy if I return to them, with these problems in my mind- it's so strange!) and I accept that as okay, still say I'm glad I was there for these things to shape me and then lead me to other stories I currently find captivating, for new and completely different reasons!

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

I'm sorry to have made you jump ahaha, it felt like something I should acknowledge which I'm glad I now did xD Awh Hush Hush, a series I never finished xD That's such an interesting point! Seeing the problems and yet knowing that those stories shaped you and yet still being able to enjoy them! I think it's probably the most nostalgic when you can't enjoy them anymore or see them much more differently and yet knowing there was a time when it was the perfect thing. And so awesome that now there's something else to fill the void! If you have any recommendations I would always love to hear them :D Thank you so so much for watching Megan, it's such a joy seeing you here!

[@GarrettRobinson]

I get this way on books all the time. I decide I MUST love this book for the rest of my life. Then years later I reread it and realize I don't actually like it any more, and there's so many books I love so much more. It's weirdly disheartening!

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

It is! I think with stories it's so much more bizarre because you find reasons to like them and then suddenly, they aren't such good reasons anymore. There are better reasons for a story to be loved. Thank you so much for watching Garrett! :D

[@ReadHeadPat]

Totally understand! As someone else says in the comments, I used to be a huge bookworm but have since started reading less and less each year just because I don't have as much time and I've found other hobbies. Sad to say that youtube has also been placed on the backburner in my life :( But again, I have loads to do and my channel isn't going anywhere so I always have the chance to create more whenever I can and want to :)

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

Freeeeedom to do what you wish and be grateful for it all! It is sad to leave things on the back burner but it's so awesome to know that you can still come back to it whenever ^_^ Thank you so much for watching my wonderful friend, I hope all is swimming along with you :D

[@paleghosty]

when i was about 9 years old my parents asked me 'will u still like spongebob this much when ur an adult?' n i promised them that i would. some of the earliest videos on my channel r about spongebob or feature shots of my huge collection of merchandise. but sure enough as time went on i started 2 like other things, new cartoons, bands, movies etc. n for a while it did feel like i was losing a huge part of my personality but then i realised that it's okay 2 change!! this video was so well articulated, nice 2 c u back here as well!!

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

I'm so glad that you found a way to gracefully move past Spongebob in all his greatness, it's so awesome to be able to appreciate everything somehow :D Yay for change and loving new things! Thank you so much! It means a lot! Hopefully you'll see more of me sooner ^_^

[@thathoopy]

I loved this video, Z! One thing I really thought about after watching Sam's video was how other people often get attached to fluid facets of my personality. Im sure I do this as well, but I really notice when others do it to me. Someone will get upset or whatever when I say I dont really like something that I used to and have a hard time getting used to my new tastes or interests or whatever.

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

Ahhhh yes that's so true! It's quite sad when you once shared a favourite thing with others and then come back to realise that you don't all think the same of it anymore though that's not to say you still can't have an awesome friendship with differing opinions! Thank you so much for watching and sharing your experience! It hadn't occurred to me!

[@ambereenk]

When I was younger, I was convinced that Maths was the thing I wanted to do for the rest of my life, at like 9 I was convinced I was going to study it at university. A few years later, I learned about animation and VFX and couldn't imagine doing anything else, and started focusing my subject choices on that. I got to university 2 years agoand part way through my first year realised that my favourite part of the course was lighting and filming, an how much I loved photography, and that, realistically, I want to be a cinematographer. I still love Maths, and animation and VFX, but cinematography is something that feels so much more who I am now. Its weirdly sad to think about the future I imagined for myself when I was younger and knowing that its not going to happen, but its also so exciting to think about this potential future I have now. That was a long ramble, oops.

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

Ambereen Khan I loved the ramble Ambereen! Thank you for taking the time to share your journey, I've had a similar tumble but I have to say I'm glad that we have both in our own ways found what our younger selves couldn't have known about what we thought we loved. There were gaps in our knowledge and I'm sure that our younger selves would be quite happy with our choices had they known 😊 thank you so much for watching!

[@MewWolf5]

I agree. I don't think it's a betrayal if you've changed opinions because you've learned more about what is out there and find that you prefer that thing. As for what I've been up to, I have been continuing my university education and the extracurricular activities that have been going along with that. I have five essays to write at the moment.

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

Indeed ^_^ Thank you so much for watching, as always! Wowza! That is quite the amount to have going on! I'm glad I've moved away from the pressure of essays though I'm sure it's something everyone adapts to somehow! I hope you've been able to balance it all and enjoy all the things!

[@MewWolf5]

Thanks. I've been gradually getting things under control. I don't mind writing essays, once I get going. Getting started is the hardest part.

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

MewWolf5 Ahhhh I think that's the case with many a thing! Get going and then you're off!

[@KarolaTea]

Yay you made a video :D :D :D Elliott also said he preferred smaller lamps to one big light. Which seemed funny to me, I never really thought about that at all ^^ He said, it's because he works doing fancy light shiz, and several smaller lamps create a more dynamic atmosphere or something. Cool though that other people also think about that stuff :D Great message :) We all change over time, and that's good. Otherwise we'd all forever be stuck in pre-school. I can't really think of a time where I felt like I 'betrayed' myself, but I can imagine that when I was younger I thought I'd always be a big reader. Last year I didn't read a single book. But that's ok, I did a lot of other things I enjoyed :)

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

Truuue! I just like how much warmer the light is and the shadows and how homely it makes me feel? Cool to know other people think into it in different ways! All stuck in pre-school is such a great way to look at it! Doing things you enjoy is probably the part that's really the most important at the end of the day and knowing that you can't predict the future. That's great too! ^_^ Thank you so much for watching Karola! :D

[@KarolaTea]

Ah yes, smaller lamps are more cosy indeed ^_^ Always do the things you enjoy doing! :D (as long as they don't harm anyone including yourself, obvs) Thank you so much for the video

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

KarolaTea Why obviously indeed ;) My pleasure!

[@joolzzenda]

When I was a teenager I placed so much of my identity on being a bookworm. I read several books a week and it was a huge part of my life. But as I got older I got busier and prioritised reading less and less. I'm now at the point where I read maybe 5 books in a year. Things may change in the future of course but I've finally accepted I'm no longer a bookworm and that's ok. I haven't failed at something, I've just found other hobbies :) That seriously took me about 6 years to accept!

[@MyNilebo]

joolzzenda yes! this is me too. I've transitioned from hardcore book reader to almost exclusively listening to audiobooks. this has been great for me since i still want to experience new stories and revisit old worlds that i read previously. i just do not have the patience/time to sit still and just read anymore. :p

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

Hey, thank you so much for watching! I've got to say I really agree with you, I don't think I based so much of my identity in other people's eyes with being a bookworm but I certainly felt somewhat sad not finding time to read. For me that's transformed from listening to audiobooks to straight out reading a book a week again which has been wonderfully refreshing but I entirely agree! Placing reading above other things is quite harmful sometimes, I think society can do that and not just ourselves. I'm so glad you've accepted it and I do hope you enjoy whatever you're doing :D Have a wonderful day!

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

I'm glad to hear that you've found a different way to read, I in recent times reread all the Harry Potter books almost exclusively through Stephen Fry's audiobooks and it was *awesome*. Audiobooks are a different and awesome experience! Thank you so much for watching!

[@lazyperfectionist1]

I received the notification for this video in my email _yesterday,_ and forgot all about it. I suspect your view-count would be a bit higher, right now, if this did not have a tendency to happen. But anyhow, yes, I've experienced this with books I've read way back in the early years of high school that, at the time, I absolutely loved (all Star Trek novels, mainly) that now I think are pretty tame. At the time, I was _sure_ I would _never_ see them differently, but of course, this perception is _never_ accurate. The way you see the world at _one_ point in your life is _bound_ to be different from the way you see it ten years later.

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

Yeah, that's a fair point. Ahh well It really is but we forget that just because the future isn't in front of us now doesn't mean it won't look vastly different when we get there. Thank you so much for watching!

[@elishasummers9517]

Well I've always been a MASSIVE language lover, when I was vary little I had my heart set on learning Italian, now I don't even remember when or why I picked it up, it was so long ago, I started learning French, with which I am utterly in be with as a nearly fluent speaker, but I always remember never wanting to learn Spanish, not as a racist or xenophobic thing, I just never really liked the language it just didn't look or sound very good. But where I live, most people speak English and/or Spanish, and I really want to enjoy Spanish with my friends who speak it, and must admit Spanish has grown in me alot in the past year.. :( not regretting learning French at all but, now I wish I knew Spanish

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

That's so interesting! It's important I think to remember that some things you can't prepare for, even though you may wish so ardently that you had and languages are definitely something I can relate to! With languages it can also be easier said than done, they require lots of practice and time and you can't do it all. Always nice to appreciate what you have done though and why and not to demean that with respect to your past self. That was definitely something I hadn't thought of, thank you so much for watching and sharing your experiences!

[@elishasummers9517]

ZainabLaLaLa No problem, thanks for replying. :)

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

My pleasure ^_^

[@oopsgirl44]

a wonderful video!

[@ZainabLaLaLa]

danceloverupu Ahhhh thank you very much! :D