You've had a missed miscarriage - now what? / how to pick between the 3 options

[@anujabhide1788]

I am crying as I’m reading through the comments. I lost my baby at 6w, my heart sank when I was told there was no heartbeat. I hope and pray all the women going through this get all the necessary help and support.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Sending you love 🙏🏻💜

[@AccidentallyAwesome1]

Same. Baby sb 8w and measured at 5w no heartbeat and show hCG growth. Heartbroken.

[@mariav.3020]

My baby stopped growing at 5w5d when I was supposed to be 11 weeks…I’ve felt so lost and this video and comments have made me feel like I’m not alone. Thank you so much for sharing this❤

[@BettinaRae]

Maria I’m so sorry for your loss. You are definitely not alone. Sending you love 💜🙏🏻

[@juliat9211]

Did you have an ultrasound before your baby stopped growing?

[@mariav.3020]

@@juliat9211 The first ultrasound was at what was supposed to be 7.5 weeks. I was bleeding a little for a few days and I went to get checked at the ER. The baby was measuring 5 weeks. So I had to get another one the following week to make sure I had the correct dates. But again measured 5 weeks. Waited another week to do another and there was no heartbeat and my HCG levels had gone down. At this point I was told it wasn’t viable.

[@juliat9211]

@@mariav.3020 I’m sorry for your loss and thank you for your response.

[@eramirezsw]

I’m really sorry Maria V. Your not alone. This happened to us as well. I just got my second ultrasound, they sent me to radiology and did another. I was then called with the results that it was a miscarriage. It’s soo hard to be a woman. We go through so many body changes and traumatic experiences. Hang in there. I know exactly how you are feeling.

[@elvirahernandez1306]

Thank you you get it! I was 12 weeks pregnant and the baby's heart just stopped my Dr told me my baby passed two days before because their was a heart beat at my last ultrasound me and my husband were crushed . Now I'm not bleeding I'm not cramping the Dr says my body doesn't know my baby has passed. I pray healing over all the moms having to go through this ❤

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss. Sending you love and hope that this next part is over for your quickly, please reach out if you need support 🙏🏻💜

[@mbetubom8539]

I'm just coming back from a ultrasound, which shows my baby of 8 weeks is gone, they say I should go for evacuation, but I'm scared

[@100milechallenge7]

My daughter went for her 12 week appt yesterday and they couldn’t find the heartbeat. The ultrasound showed the baby stopped growing at 8w5d. This is so heartbreaking. We had already started to get onesies and swaddles. She chose the meds and will be taking them tomorrow and I’ll be by her side through it all. I wish she would have chosen the D&C just so she wouldn’t have to go through more pain and see it all. Prayers for all the mommas going through the same ❤

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your daughters (and your) loss. What a gift you are to sit beside her in this heartbreaking time. Sending love that it is a fast and uncomplicated process for her now. 🙏🏻💜

[@100milechallenge7]

@@BettinaRae her body started the process before she can take the medication and then she took the medication to help things along and the pain of all we ended up in the hospital for a D&C 😞

[@natalier4859]

i’m so sorry for the loss🤍currently going through this & im going to have to get a d&c :(, hope all is well now

[@samualgoodrick-cs9kx]

Did you experience no pregnancy symptoms when her heartbeat stopped?

[@ginawilgar5859]

I see how hard this was for you to do and talk about. But I thank you so so much. My daughter had 2nd miscarriage yesterday. She is devastated. I'll have her watch your videos and hopefully not feel so alone. I'm sorry for your losses. Thank you for sharing and know this will help so many other woman.

[@kenyakeoni]

It's been three years, and I still feel sadness after losing my baby. God bless any family experiencing a loss so heavy.

[@BettinaRae]

The grief never really leaves. You just get better at carrying it. 💜

[@imnotlikeothergirls5]

Best video I have found addressing this topic. I’m at the tail end of my natural miscarriage after a missed miscarriage. Most traumatic physical experience of my life so far. I’m saving your video to share with others in the future. Thank you for making this.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss. Sending you love 🙏🏻💜

[@MoralesGirl4]

I had a pre- NIPT test ultrasound at 11 weeks a few days ago where the sonographer told me there was no heartbeat. It’s unbelievable, it died at 9 weeks but I still feel so many pregnancy symptoms. My first pregnancy and I am devastated, I am grieving not only the baby but my hopes and dreams for the future. I am now waiting for the hospital to contact me for a D&C, just wish my body understood it’s over now.

[@BettinaRae]

It’s so hard to understand why our bodies do that. Let yourself grieve. Sending you love and hope 🙏🏻💜

[@amberprescott6157]

Same thing is going on with me. All the symptoms still and not bleeding. It’s a very confusing sad time.

[@sduyck1327]

Thank you so much for making this. I am currently in the waiting phase of miscarriage and was looking for some helping words. I appreciate you sharing.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss. Sending you love for healing 🙏🏻💜

[@MarcieJ2000]

I went through this a few years ago and am listening now bc I still feel like I’m healing from it. Thanks for making this video 💕

[@BettinaRae]

You are welcome Marcelle. Sending you love and hope for your healing. 🙏🏻💜

[@dutchmenot698]

I am teary-eyed watching your video. 😭 I am having missed miscarriage now. Still waiting that if will come out naturally but I've waited for a week and a day now.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss. I hope it is resolved quickly for you and you can begin healing. 💜

[@jennyme007]

Thank you for sharing your story. I was 9 weeks and 1 day when i found out my baby's heart has stopped beating. My baby was measuring 6 weeks and 5 days. Now I am booked for my D&C next week. I know that I will be more heartbroken knowing that my baby is no longer in my womb. But with your story, i know that I am not alone.❤

[@BettinaRae]

Hi Jenny. I’m so sorry to hear your baby has died. Look after yourself over the coming weeks. Please reach out if you need. I’ll be sending love 🙏🏻💜

[@USALifeDiaries]

How is the experience with d&c? How long did it take to recover?

[@ashleyevespa]

Thank you for making this video. I just found out about our loss today and you've answered so many of my questions. To have the perspective of someone who's gone through a similar loss is much more valuable to me at this moment than all the information the doctor can throw at me.

[@BettinaRae]

Im so sorry you’re going through this Ashley. But I’m happy that my work has helped in some small way. Sending you love. Please reach out if you need 🙏🏻💜

[@ouachay]

This. The sad reality is that early miscarriages done naturally often result in you flushing tissue or just watching whatever comes out of your body go down the drain. It’s a really heartbreaking experience, I cried in the shower not knowing if I just passed it. Every time a clot came out in the toilet, I sobbed. Was I just going to…flush it? It’s the sad reality that no one talks about. And often, yes-you just watch it go down. Nothing gets wrapped up in a box with a bow on top.

[@BettinaRae]

It is a heartbreaking experience. I’m sorry you too had to go through this. 🙏🏻💜

[@chal813]

I did the same thing. I cried every time I felt the pressure of clots coming out. I wanted to do it naturally and when the baby came out, it was the most scary thing I had ever experienced. I still can’t believe they went down the toilet like nothing. 😞😞😞💔

[@tamtai5824]

Same feeling 😢and on top of it all there's the fear of doing a number 2 at the same time....u don't want to mix the fetus with anything messy...its just a mess , that's the best way to describe this all. There's no way to prepare for this...

[@ntabonyamoita8881]

​@@chal813 so painful

[@chelseapike3493]

This was the most helpful, informative, and thoughtful video. I needed advice on my options after bad news at my ultrasound apt, and this video made me feel so seen. I’ve never felt so connected to someone through a screen. Thank you for sharing the info, but also for sharing your heart. I felt it and needed it ❤

[@BettinaRae]

I’m glad this was helpful for you Chelsea. I’m sorry you’re in the position to need it though. Sending you love. 🙏🏻💜

[@rebeccastevens2903]

Thank you so much for sharing your personal story and details. I have never had a miscarriage and am 35/36 weeks pregnant with my second child. Learning more about miscarriage makes me very grateful for what I have. A couple of months or so before this current pregnancy I did have what seemed to be a failed attempted pregnancy or failed implantation (without IVF). It seemed like my body was going attempting to conceive, but something didn't go right. My doctor had me get an ultrasound because she agreed with my suspicions, but nothing was found. I suppose it all passed out before the ultrasound. It was an emotional experience for me, I remember crying when I felt the cramping because I didn't think it was a normal period. Fortunately, I didn't go through the process of getting a positive pregnancy test or telling friends/family I thought I was pregnant because it happened so early. Ironically, my older sister ended up having an actual miscarriage around the same time and had to experience pushing out a baby. I can only imagine how deeply life changing a full-on miscarriage can be. My heart goes out to everyone who has had to endure such a thing. Thanks again for sharing this powerful information.

[@jessicakelley0]

I’m in the middle of my 2nd miscarriage this year. The 1st I was 11weeks along &it was extremely painful &I saw the baby come out.😢 This time it’s very early on, so it feels more like moderate cramps right now. I actually think that something went wrong during implantation &the rest is just coming out now…idk because I haven’t seen the Doctor yet, but I bled a lot more than usual during the implantation, which was only 3weeks ago. The thing is, I had all of the normal pregnancy symptoms up until this morning- so I was very hopeful until I woke up bleeding. I feel so disappointed &sad because I want to have a baby SOOO badly! Anyways, your videos are very comforting to me,& I just wish that I could give you an actual hug right now! Since I can’t, I’m going to continue to do your guided meditations- which are so healing! Thank you for caring so much!❤

[@BettinaRae]

Jessica, I am sending you a virtual hug. I’m so sorry to hear of your losses. Look after yourself, please reach out if you need 🙏🏻💜

[@sammie88]

I have just had my 12 week scan today and found out I had a mmc and baby died at around 7-8 weeks 😢 i’m completely devastated and heartbroken and have not stopped crying all day. I’m now deciding what to do and thinning of doing the surgical route. Thank you for this video. It’s been very helpful ❤

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry Sammie. It is devastating and so heartbreaking. Sending you love and I hope the process is uncomplicated for you. 🙏🏻💜

[@_destinylanae]

Thank you for sharing. I just had my first miscarriage at almost 15 weeks a week ago and it’s been a very heavy loss to bear. You described all the emotions I’ve endured perfectly even down to the D&C procedure i chose to have because i didn’t want to draw out the trauma i experienced from the miscarriage. It’s been tough. You’re story is very much appreciated and i hope you are healing well ❤

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss Destiny. Sending you love and strength for healing 🙏🏻💜

[@JessicaKing-r3r]

Thank you for sharing this video. I am currently experiencing this. I had a silent miscarriage at 16 weeks and just like you had to be induced into labor and pass the baby, it was traumatic. I did this while living abroad and navigating a different healthcare system and it made it even that much harder. Praying for the strength to make these days easier. And praying for others who are going through this. It is not easy.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry you’re going through this Jessica. Sending you love 🙏🏻💜

[@marisaruettimann6021]

I found out yesterday and I have to wait till Wednesday to be seen at the hospital, but the midwives warned me it’s likely to happen before then. I’m absolutely terrified and I’m so sorry you’ve experienced this more than twice. I was briefly explained the methods over the phone, but it was important and helpful for me to hear about the emotional side of things by watching this video. Thank you x

[@BettinaRae]

Oh Marisa, I am so sorry you are in this position. I’m glad this video was helpful for you. Sending you love and healing. 🙏🏻💜✨

[@stephanieramirez9365]

Thank you for showing raw emotion.. cursing that’s how I feel right now. I just had my first miscarriage.. this was my first pregnancy 💔

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss Stephanie. Reach out if you need 💜

[@JCQue]

I went for my 12 week ultrasound on Monday and was told that my baby had stopped growing at around 5 weeks. My world collapsed in that very second. I begged the sonographer to check again and tell me she was wrong. I have to go back into hospital on Monday to discuss my options. I am crushed beyond belief and feel like my world has ended 💔💔

[@BettinaRae]

JC. I’m so sorry that you’re in this situation. I understand that heartbreak too well. Sending you love and hope that the next part of the process is over for you soon. Please reach out if you need. 💜

[@MarisaKaeb]

My baby stopped growing at 6w2d. Went in for my 8 wk ultrasound and received the news, my baby had died. I tried the medication, didn't work. I was just in for a D&C this morning and recovering. Finally able to heal and move on. Thank you for this video, it was affirming and I am thankful to know I am not alone, even though I just feel so empty right now.

[@BettinaRae]

Marisa I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Be gentle with yourself now. Please reach out if you need support 🙏🏻💜

[@iamisa6163]

Thank you so so much for making this. I’m currently waiting for a miscarriage at home and i feel so hopeless. 😞Your video means so much right now. Thank you

[@BettinaRae]

I’m glad this was helpful. So sorry to hear you are in this position now.

[@rachele676]

I’m also currently waiting at home for my own missed miscarriage. This is the most agonizing experience 😢. I wish we weren’t having to go through this awful experience

[@jessicamartin8701]

Thank you for sharing this and showing raw emotion. It’s exactly how I feel right now and exactly what I needed. I have no idea which of the 3 options to do but I know I need to make a decision. Found out last week at first ultrasound there was no heartbeat . I’m just so lost, scared and not sure what to do right now 💔

[@samanthadwyer4131]

I had a slightly different experience because mine was due to severe abnormalities, but I had a d and E at 18 weeks after a loss and it was horrible, I’m almost 3 months out and this is the worst event I’ve ever had of my life, knowing that other women are here is so helpful ❤ I am anticipating my period tomorrow even though we ttc last month and it’s making it so much harder because I had a negative test today

[@samanthadwyer4131]

This was my first baby and only pregnancy ever and I really want to have a good experience being pregnant and having it work

[@BettinaRae]

Hi Samantha. I am so so sorry for your loss. It is heartbreaking however it happens. Please reach out if you need support 🙏🏻💜

[@raisa4281]

Thank you so much for your generosity in sharing such difficult experiences in order to help others through their own turmoil. It means a lot and I feel so seen even though we don't know each other.

[@BettinaRae]

Thank you for these kind words Raisa. I’m so glad that my work has been able to help you 🙏🏻💜

[@candykanex3]

I found out over the weekend (I was supposed to be 10 weeks) that our baby's heart stopped just a few days prior. It's the worst experience ever. We did IVF and even tested the embryos but there will never be answers on what went wrong. Thank you for this video. I'm sorry you have also experienced such horrible loss.

[@BettinaRae]

Oh I am so so sorry for your loss. It’s just heartbreaking and so hard to understand why. Please reach out if you need support. Sending love 🙏🏻💜

[@chiquititag786]

Thank you sooo much for your honesty and sharing everything you know. I miscarried a few days ago due to no cardiac activity 😢 baby stopped growing at 9 weeks I am still heartbroken 💔 devastated I should say. Didn’t know what to expect. Emotions are still all over the place. I leave everything to the lord above 🙏🕊️

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry you are going through this. Sending you love 🙏🏻💜

[@chiquititag786]

@@BettinaRae thank you sooo much greatly appreciated ♥️

[@sarahhawkinsrusk8462]

Thank you for this. Just received word yesterday, and feeling quite lost. I appreciate your guidance in our next steps.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry to hear you’re going through this Sarah. Sending you love. Please reach out if you need. 🙏🏻💜

[@poprocks9176]

i needed this video of just the emotional support i have no one no friends or family the father was abusive and i escaped him BECAUSE i was protecting the baby. Losing it was a win in an awful package and im still grieving what couldve been and i feel so alone.

[@BettinaRae]

Oh gosh. That is so hard. I’m so sorry for your loss. Sending you love 🙏🏻💜

[@sarahmonohon7131]

Thank you so much for making this. Your tears make it clear that you understand. I was leaning towards medication but I was still worried that I would be subjecting myself to unnecessary pain and trauma vs. the D&C. Your point about getting to be home, with childcare arranged and a support person with you, and then expecting a flood of emotional pain during the process….this feels like the right path for me. I need to release this pain.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry you’re going through this Sarah. Sending you love. Please reach out if you need 🙏🏻💜

[@amarpreetsangha4605]

Hi Bettina, Thank you so much for making this video and thank you for being transparent and building the courage and strength to talk about this sensitive topic. You have really helped me in choosing my options for managing miscarriage. We lost our baby and it was heart breaking. It's difficult dealing with the loss. I am still coming to terms with it. I wish you the very best for the future and hope that God blesses you with a child very soon.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m sorry you’re going through this but I’m glad I was able to help you.

[@marthaoana]

Thank you Betina. I can't believe that I am watching this 😭 I just found out that by baby's heart stopped beating at 8 weeks, just a few days ago. I can't get over the loss, but it is even harder and scary that I have to go through the physical pain to. I feel broke.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Please reach out if you need. Sending love 🙏🏻💜

[@krutikapatel6728]

It was my 1st pregnancy and just had my 12 week scan yesterday and found out that i had a missed miscarraige , there was no heartbeat and was being told that my baby stopped growing at 8 weeks. It was so shocking and heartwrenching for us. Cant get over the fact that i am not pregnant anymore. It has been really tough journey for me as it was my 2nd time IVF pregnancy as the 1st one dint succed. And i was on rhe top of the world as i was pregnant with twins this time but unfortunately at 6 weeks we lost the heartbeat of 1 twin , it broke my heart but managed anyhow thinking atleast we had one and was superexcited thinking i made through my 1st trimester and soon in few weeks will be feeling my baby moving. I still cant believe what has happened. Its really hard and can understand how every women who goes through this feels. Sending love to all those beautiful to be mom’s❤️

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so so sorry to hear this news. Sending you so much love, it’s devastating. Please reach out if you need. 🙏🏻💜

[@magentavonkleist]

I'm currently waiting for my miscarriage to happen naturally... My baby has died a good month ago now and I'm so tired of waiting ... My obgyn told me that's the best option, but it's kind of difficult to wait and to prepare everyday to release the baby today ... Thanks for your video !

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss Elise. It’s such a heartbreaking experience to have to wait. Sending you love 💜

[@sarinsarit9034]

So sorry for your loss Heartbreaking thank you 🙏 For Your story

[@MrsXx]

I chose the d&c for a silent miscarriage I had at 8 weeks & 4 days, they were measuring at 8 weeks & 1 day. As I had a complete miscarriage that was traumatic previously, I didn't want a repeat of it as I do have PTSD surrounding that experience. Thank you for sharing this video, you explain them in such a relative way, from inner-standing. It's healing for me to watch after the fact. I hope you are healing from your difficult losses. 🤍

[@BettinaRae]

I’m glad to hear this was healing for you. I have, thank you 🙏🏻💜

[@lifuue]

Thank you for that video. Im currently goin thrue natural miscarriage, not informed very well and my most sad part of it is I am feeling completely alone with it. My partner doesn't care and doesn't want to put much interest in this process, can't count with my family and plus the fact that I am abroad, with my other kid and cant take good care for myself.. Writing this here feels a lil better. And finding woman like you sharing their experience helps. Sending lots of love to you all brave woman

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry you are going through this and feel alone Monika. Please reach out if you need support 🙏🏻💜

[@niyeliscoplin7017]

I found out at 9 weeks that my baby stopped growing at 6 weeks. By far the most heartbroken ive ever felt. Mamas, you will get through… bless you all and your journey

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss. Sending you love 🙏🏻💜

[@heinatapesar8912]

Thank you for this video. I've never felt more connected to someone , everything you said im feeling right now. 💔. First pregnancy and my baby stopped growing at 6 weeks.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss Heina. Sending you love and healing 🙏🏻💜

[@tas2031]

Same exact situation, my bf and I thought we were 10 weeks pregnant and we went for the ultrasound and our baby stopped growing at 6 weeks. The only peace I’m able to get is knowing that I’m not alone. I’m so sorry for your loss, for both of our losses. This is brutal, hang in there 💕

[@andrewjhoond5218]

Did u manage to get pregnant again?

[@ruthgilissen]

Thank you so much for the video. I have miscarried and i am super scared for what gonna happen, the midwife didn’t tell me this detail.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry you’re going through this Ruth. Please reach out if you need 💜

[@spaceballsthechannel4153]

I had my first ultrasound 2 days ago in 9th week. My precious stopped growing 2 weeks ago, no heartbeat and no blood flow. Scanning again in 3 days but there's literally no hope left... Probably choosing surgery because I can't bare the thought of my body still holding on to my dead child. Im devastated since it's my very first pregnancy and I have no kids to hug and be thankful for. I feel so alone. If it wasn't for my partner I don't know where I'd be. This is awful and nobody should be forced to go through this.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry to hear you are going through this. You’re right. It is just so awful and unfair. Sending love for healing 💜

[@USALifeDiaries]

How is the experience with d&c? How long did it take to recover?

[@spaceballsthechannel4153]

@@USALifeDiaries I chose not to get a d&c. Instead I stayed in hospital for one day and they gave me pills that started the miscarriage process. The doctors said this is the best of ways if you want to get pregnant again right after, which worked out well, I'm currently 5 months pregnant.

[@hannahaboobaker3036]

I’m so glad to have found you and really sorry for your losses and hope u will one day fully heal because I can see the emotion you’re still feeling and I’m feeling it too with u …..I have my own detailed and abit gruesome story if u would like to read ….(I was 16 weeks pregnant )….. I just found out two days ago as I went for an emergency scan coz I was bleeding for 3 days ( what they call spotting ) at first it was like ground coffee so I searched it up and it said that it’s quite normal for pregnant women to get some bleeding but baby is usually fine after 10 weeks of pregnancy …so I didn’t think much of it then second day it was like brownish mucus like early period then the third day the toilet water was light red and I could see some flattish red tissue like a period so that’s when I told my husband that I was bleeding ( didn’t tell him Before coz I didn’t want him to worry ) Anyway he took me for an emergency scan which was a waiting of 4 hrs and loads of questions and in n out of rooms and blood pressure tests n checks . Finally got in the scanning room and the lady told me that the baby’s heartbeat had stopped at 11 weeks and they were really sympathetic and sorry but I was just in shock and disbelief so I never really had a reaction and just sat there saying it was meant to be and I couldn’t do anything now but was also very confused as it was my first ever miscarriage and didn’t know how to react or what to expect ! I think my emotions froze but deep inside I was sad but couldn’t really express it … I called my husband and told him ( he wasn’t allowed in with me due to safely precautions ) he was equally shocked and didn’t expect that so I got up and went to a room where then they allowed my husband to come in …..they made us nice hot drinks called someone in to talk to us and as u said … all three options were scary and none of them sounded easier than the other and ofcourse because they have to be safe on their part they mention everything dwn to the worst scenarios so that was kind of confusing … I asked a few questions about if I came in earlier maybe something else could have been done and they said there’s nothing that would have changed the outcome and I asked if there has ever been a time where babies heartbeat could come back or maybe is a mistake n they said nope so I was like ok I’m just throwing anything that pops in my head coz u really dint want to believe what you’re hearing but it wasn’t really getting better to be fair ….. Anyway I was given three leaflets with the 3 options that u mentioned and they told Me that I could go home and take up to a week to decide what option I wanted to go for and that it’ll take a few weeks of cramping and everything to come out like heavy periods - maybe for some but for me was a complete different experience ! After the scan they gave me a huge pad and a disposable pants to wear so I kept it on n after the whole hospital experience and options which sounded like a slow process and I could take my time to get back to them I wasn’t expecting much so I got home and told my children That were not having any baby anymore and just sat in my local park till evening for fresh air. Came home and went to bed still wearing the pad n pants coz I was too tired to be honest to do anything and at 2am I’m Having proper contractions that we’re getting closer n closer n the pain was like when you’re in proper labour and u stay at home till u feel like ok now it’s time to go coz they’re getting stronger and closer like few minutes apart (I’ve have children before so I’m experienced but for new mothers I’ll tell u it’s like really really bad period cramping n back pain n tummy contractions! So make sure your partner is rubbing your back n tummy n supporting you. After two hrs or so I heard something pop inside but it wasn’t painful but it’s like waters breaking feeling so I rushed to the bathroom n sat on the loo and I’m happy that I had that pad coz it was soaked ! Water wee I don’t know but I was coming out and then plop slipped out a clean fully formed baby ! I caught it in my hand and I was in shock and instantly started crying and a heap of emotions came out because I wasn’t expecting a whole fully formed tiny jelly baby coming out ! My husband was shocked and the umbilical cord was still stuck inside me so I slowly tried pulling it n it broke so here in my hand is a baby n then I’m sitting on the loo and 5-10 mins later I just put a new pad on n oh my !!! Big clots n blood were coming out so I sat back on the toilet and chucked the pad n pants away n then again this happened to me like 4 times with more blood and heavy clots that were the size of my hand n looked like raw liver coming out , I think up to 5 or 6 huge clots came out n probably the placenta but I didnt see that . I filled like 4 huge fat hospital Pads of blood and started feeling dizzy so asked my husband to get me some water and honey …. Had two spoons and felt better. By the way after the fourth time I just stayed out on the toilet coz I was tired of running back n forth till I felt after 20 mins that nothing was coming out like clots then I changed into a new pair of pants n pad. Also after the initial baby coming out part I had contractions for another 1.5 hrs till all the clots were out n heavy bleeding … a proper traumatic experience and I wished the nurses would have told me that so I knew what to expect ( I mean maybe others may not go through the same experience but I feel that it should be mentioned and that’s why I’m really happy to have seen this video and I felt so strongly of sharing my experience so others could be aware of what they could expect. Your video is great . So to carry on further …. After I cleaned up I couldn’t part from a baby n got attached but I knew I had to do something so after a few hrs and also not being able to sleep and researching of what to do ….I wrapped it in a little tissue and buried it in my large plant with more soil and cried because it was the toughest thing I ever did … it was in the palm of my hand n very tiny. I really was t expecting a full clean baby but it is what it is , then I slept fir an hr and then woke up emotional n guilty and seriously was looking at others experiences and also articles of what leads to miscarriages and in a way I was feeling may coz I was dehydrated coz I wasn’t drinking enough water at one stage ( I get really bad sickness in pregnancies ) I was kind of blaming myself and also feeling guilty but then I spoke to my sister who made me tap out (EFT) the image of the baby with all my guilty feelings and seuoisky it helped me so much with healing even though it’s after one day … the emotion connected with the picture in my head if the baby n the trauma got a lot easier to deal with , so now I can type it out to help others too that there is a quick way of healing from traumatic experiences but it will always be with me and my baby is my baby .. I hope all of you heal and know that it’s ok and it’s not your fault … it was meant to be and only god knows the reason ( maybe it had some complications that u wouldn’t have been able to bear or abnormalities or death later !)only God knows the true reason but He is the Most kind and knows what u can and cannot bear . So be kind to yourself and do not blame yourself for any of it. Take care and all the best to you all. I only wrote all this because I was so angry and upset I wasn’t told clearly and didn’t know what to expect . My sister found out at 13 weeks she had a miscarriage but she had to wait till 15/16 weeks and she said she just had heavy periods and clots so each person is different but I dint think she realised there’s a baby n just flushed the toilet … I saw the baby and didn’t expect that … I thought I’d just see blood clots n stuff. So just warning u. My other sister had a miscarriage but it was at 7 weeks and she experiences heavy periods and she took the medicine but she said that naturally is best and my mum just told me she had a miscarriage and they didn’t give her an option but straight surgery but it was harder for her to heal from the surgery so natural is a hood option if U could wait but again she’s on point in the video … Thankyou again for making this video , it really is s great help Wow I just realised I’ve typed alot !

[@hannahaboobaker3036]

Also I am now feeling just like I’ve given birth at 9 months where I’m keeping warm and drinking warm barley and millet flour woth jaggery ( molasses sugar) drinks and everything that’s “heating/hot foods for the body to heal and also to let anything n everthing out of the body . Stay safe and keep warm and rest well - u deserve the peace and rest Also burning frankinsece and staring over it is very good fir the uterus and any infections so that’s great too

[@BettinaRae]

Thank you so much for sharing this Hannah. I’m so sorry for your loss. I think we underestimate how much a miscarriage is like a birth. They are the same process for the body really. I’m glad you are treating yourself kindly and am sending you love 🙏🏻💜

[@rekha8919]

Thank u for sharing .. right now i m carrying my dead child inside me crying in washroom... Thinking what to do next... 😢 Hugs to u with all the pain u just posted for ppl like me who are going through this pain. ❤🎉 Thank you stay strong i am trying to be

[@BettinaRae]

Rekha, I’m so sorry to hear you’re going through this. Sending you love and strength. 🙏🏻💜

[@ayoungkim212]

Just lost my second baby at 4weeks and 3 days… lost my first one at 8 weeks but I think I miscarried earlier back in October.. your videos are helpful! Thank you!

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your losses. Sending you love 🙏🏻💜

[@danielaa506]

Sending you so much love I've lost one baby @ 6 weeks (Oct 2020) and a missed miscarriage of identical twins in May of 2022. (no heartbeat detected at 8 weeks) I chose to naturally pass the twins because I felt it was the best option for me was to let nature take its course and I wanted to feel the experience so I could heal emotionally. It's still so hard though...🕊🕊🕊

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your losses Daniela. Sending you love 🙏🏻💜

[@maramay7295]

How long did it take for your body to start miscarrying naturally? Going through this. Saw heart beats at 5 weeks and 6 weeks. Went in on Friday when I should have been 8 weeks and the babies were still measuring at 6 weeks with no heart beats. I still feel pregnant, this is so hard but I would like deal with it naturally but I’m not sure how long I can wait emotionally.

[@BettinaRae]

@@maramay7295 It's a super tricky one to answer because each one has been different. It might be over in a couple of days, or you could wait weeks. Choose what feels right for you and your heart. Sending you love.

[@alysiawilsonx288]

Thank you for this video. Ive just had my first miscarriage and the feeling is like no other. I can relate to this video so much and really needed it. xx

[@BettinaRae]

I’m sorry you’re going through this. Reach out if you need. 🙏🏻💜

[@leelapeterson6703]

The best video ever. I'm going through this right now.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry you’re going through this Leela. Sending you love 💜

[@kielahstone7016]

I’m going through this now and the grieving process is real. I’m crying everyday, and can’t control it, even during an exam yesterday. My baby girl had a heartbeat at 11w3d but at 12w4d she did not. I could tell by the techs reaction, but still asked for the ultrasound pic for memory but find it difficult to look at because to know what position she’s laying in no longer alive is triggering me. My fear with passing her naturally is seeing her, did you for your 10 week miscarriage? Sorry for your losses, it’s sooo painful

[@BettinaRae]

Kielah, I am so so sorry you are going through this. I’ve seen the sac during a 12 week loss but didn’t go looking for the baby (if that makes sense). Either way, it devastating. Do what feels right for you. Sending you love and strength 🙏🏻💜

[@misssamhain4334]

I’m currently going through this right now.. I lost one baby Monday and the other 1 has no heartbeat & has stopped growing. I feel so lost.

[@BettinaRae]

@@misssamhain4334 I'm so sorry this is heartbreaking. Sending you love.

[@misssamhain4334]

@@BettinaRae I found a lot of comfort in your video .. I’m just not sure what to do yet.. I have started having cramps in my pelvis/legs /back so I’m sure it’s coming but I haven’t started bleeding yet

[@BettinaRae]

@@misssamhain4334 It can be a long process sometimes. Look after you x

[@shannonhazlitt5625]

Thank you so much for this video ♥ This is full of so much valuable information and I feel like I found it at the perfect time. I also really appreciate how honest it is about each option as I just found out I need to consider them after hearing some unfortunate news after a second ultrasound appointment at 8 weeks, 6 days with my first pregnancy.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss. Sending you love 💜

[@chiarab4925]

I cried Watchung thus 😢 i feel for you. I see your pain and feel your pain I'm going with the D&C I'm 19 weeks baby passed at 15 and 4 .... I had to wait 6 days my surgery is after tomorrow

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Sending you love and strength for healing 🙏🏻💜

[@jessikabulli2027]

I had a pregnancy loss early August. Then I had to get the d&c surgery I just felt like life couldn’t get any worse. Luckily my job is understanding, took some time off. I almost need to clock in now just to distract myself for a few hours. I cry..idk..My period just started so I guess that’s a good sign my body is back to normal but if you are not ok, I’m telling you.. I wasn’t either and I hope you feel better ❤

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss Jessi. Sending you love 🙏🏻💜

[@LitKAW303]

Thank you for this video making the difficult decision about what route to take. Found out about our 8 week loss at our first ultrasound which was crushing. Now to make the decision before doctor calls tomorrow.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry you’re in this position. Sending you love. 🙏🏻💜 Please feel free to reach out for support if you need.

[@Magnate1992]

So sorry for your loss ♡

[@BettinaRae]

💜💜💜

[@shchetinina]

Where I live, they don't offer you the option to wait for it to happen naturally, they send you to the hospital immediately, saying that the fact that the fetus has not been developing for a while is dangerous for you, as the inflamation process has started in your uterus. For me, it has been really traumatic. Not only did I loose a pregnancy, but I also felt that I'm in danger somehow. I've just had a surgery after my second missed miscarriage and honestly I'm so lost and scared and sad. This time aroud I made to my 12 weeks scan only to find out the baby stopped developing at around 9 week. Thanks for your video!

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss, and also for the trauma of it. Sending you love for healing. 🙏🏻💜

[@shchetinina]

@@BettinaRae thank you so much! 🙏

[@kathrynrene3649]

Thank you for this had 11 weeks and 6 day ultrasound and no heartbeat or growth was measuring 8 weeks and 5 days and trying to figure out what to do. Thank you for sharing ❤

[@BettinaRae]

I'm so sorry for your loss Kathryn. Sending you love.

[@AccidentallyAwesome1]

Thank you so much for this video. It is truly horrible and this helps so much. Thank you so much!

[@BettinaRae]

It is so horrible. I’m glad this video was helpful for you though. 🙏🏻💜

[@Rachel-pp6mn]

Im going through this right now.😢😢 i lost mine at 8 weeks yesterday. I’m so done with pregnancy.

[@BettinaRae]

Rachel I’m so sorry to hear you are going through this. Take the time you need to heal. You will get through this. 💜

[@haileyeatspaperclip]

I'm so broken I don't know what to do

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry you are feeling this way. Please reach out if you need support.

[@jamesdigriz5449]

Thank you so much for this video! We were told about the missed miscarriage today... In your opinion what's the best way a husband can support his wife who just experienced it? Both devastated, but my wife must be suffering way more than me, and I want to support her the best I can. For me it's "just" pain and shock I still can't fully comprehend, but for her it's like a blackhole opened inside her heart, she is walking around like an empty shell. I want to be there for her, yet it's hard to pick up the right words.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss James. It’s so hard for her because her whole future as she imagined it has just disappeared. You can’t fix it, and there is no right way to support her. My advice would be - Don’t close up on your own pain. It’s different to hers but she will want to know you’re feeling it too. Hold each other tenderly and start to slowly look forward together.

[@jamesdigriz5449]

@@BettinaRae Thank you so much, Bettina!! We live in Japan, where from week 10 a pregnancy is considered "safe", so parents are given a health/medication book for the new baby, the baby is officially considered alive and has to be registered at a public hall correspondingly. With a miscarriage at week 12 we have to go through ALL the procedures as if some (born) person passed away, including funeral/cremation, the surgical miscarriage procedure considered to be an "official birth-giving". As if losingan unborn child with several week lasting heartbeat, 10 cm long, etc. is not hard enough on parents, so these stupid laws are making it much harder. We opted for cremation with other unborn babies instead of a family member cremation. In Japan, such cremated unborn babies are usually placed in special shrines, where souls of all unborn babies "rest together". There is a special day in August in Japan to honor ansestors, and it's also considered the day for parents to visit their miscarried "resting" babies in those shrines to pray.

[@BettinaRae]

@@jamesdigriz5449 that sounds hard to go through but also beautiful. I’m glad your baby is acknowledged as real and given a resting place you can go visit.

[@BDG_98xo]

Thankyou for this video I feel like no one gives you an explanation of what is going to happen especially if you don’t have family or friends to ask . Started yesterday morning and bleeding more heavily today I wasn’t aware there was options I was just told to let my body take its course so I’m home on bed rest losing my baby I never saw or heard at 6 weeks is so hard .

[@BettinaRae]

Hi Brandy. I’m sorry you need this video but I’m glad it has been helpful info for you. Sending you love and healing 🙏🏻💜

[@EbereCindy-b8y]

Same😢😢😢

[@lori.046]

This is what I am experiencing right now. Contractions, still waiting for the tissue to come out. 😭

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Sending you love and strength. 🙏🏻💜

[@carolinekashuck4225]

Thank you for this. I went through a MMC last week. I chose the pill option. I am completely traumatized. I went it at 10 weeks and baby had no heartbeat and was 7 weeks 3 days 🥺. I go back next week to see if I passed everything and I am so scared I’ll have to have a D&C. 😭😭😭 I’m so mad at my body.

[@BettinaRae]

I felt like that too. Let yourself feel it all. Sending you love and healing 🙏🏻💜

[@SandraTu-qe1kw]

Could you share any updates on your situation? I know it happened a year ago. I am in the same place now. After. A week of natural management, I was offered pills but after 16 hours there are no signs of clots or tissue passing. I am dreading what's next...

[@USALifeDiaries]

How is the experience with d&c? How long did it take to recover?

[@manda1433]

Thanks for this. I had my ten week appointment this week, but the baby was measuring six weeks and no heartbeat. I go back in a couple of weeks for a second scan, but the outlook is not good. I'm trying to prepare myself for all the options.

[@BettinaRae]

Oh Manda. I’m so sorry to hear this. Sending you love 💜

[@helengarner6100]

Thank you, thank you, thank you. Going through this for the second time. Trying to make a decision is so so hard.

[@BettinaRae]

You’re welcome Helen. I wish more than anything you didn’t have to make it. Sending you love 🙏🏻💜

[@kingdomtruth7773]

I can certainly relate. I’m a wife and mother of a 7 1/2 year old, whom I had naturally and miraculously at age 46. The 2nd time I became pregnant I 52 and I was of course wonderfully surprised. Yes, and it natural without any help from man, but God was the one did it, who allowed me to conceive. However, sadly experienced a miscarriage Dec. 10 into 11 of 2021. I cried and cried 😢 wishing, hoping, praying there was a way I could stop it. But the Lord knows why. However, even in my pain I asked the Lord to heal my mind, my heart. He did in a very short period of time. As a Word of encouragement the Lord Scripture says the following for us women, Verse: 13 “For thou hast possessed my reins: thou hast covered me in my mother's womb. Verse:14 I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well. Verse:15 My substance was not hid from thee, when I was made in secret, and curiously wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Verse:16 Thine eyes did see my substance, yet being unperfect; and in thy book all my members were written, which in continuance were fashioned, when as yet there was none of them.” (Psalm 139:13-16). Yes, the Lord can do the impossible, “He maketh the barren woman) to keep house, and to (be a joyful mother of children). Praise ye the LORD.” (Psalm 113:9). Next, “Lo, (children are an heritage) of the LORD: and (the fruit of the womb) is his reward.” (Psalm 127:3). Also, for those already have at least one child or several children“ Train up a (child) in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” (Proverbs 22:6). “And that from a child thou hast known the holy scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus.” (2 Timothy 3:15). Finally, for, the youth or young adults, “Remember now thy Creator in the days of thy (youth),…” (Ecclesiastes 12:1). Also, when they need Godly counsel to keep them on the right path, “Wherewithal shall a (young man) cleanse his way? by taking heed thereto according to thy word.” (Psalm 119:6) ❤ May the Lord continue to give grace and comfort the many women who may never have had a child before, including those who became mothers, but who are experiencing fertility issues or who have had miscarriages, making it difficult to have another child. When it happened to me, I never would have believed it to happen to me, but God knows. We live in a sinful world and due the Eve’s original sin at creation, we all suffer because of it. However, God’s grace will see us through, especially for those who receive Christ as Lord and Savior. God is still doing great things, in spite of test, trials and disappointments in this life. God is still good and has blessed us even though we experience this misfortune. He has better things in store for all His believing children in the earth made new. Read (Isaiah 65:17-19) and Revelation 21:1-4). See R E K L A M A T I O N online.

[@Paperclipx]

I had a missed miscarriage 3 weeks ago tomorrow and I hate how the doctor just told me I have three options and sat there like I knew what I wanted. I had to ask her for some time to think about it. I’m in the US and chose the pull option and they didn’t prepare me for what would happen next. I wish I would have seen your video before.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry this has happened to you. Perhaps my work can help you now as you heal. Sending you love 💜🙏🏻

[@lindagudre7477]

Thank you for being that honest 🧡🧡🤗

[@BettinaRae]

You’re welcome Linda. I hope it was helpful 🙏🏻💜

[@mojcham]

❤ thank you so much for this..lost my baby at 8 weeks,it's been 3 weeks since and I can't seem to go on..I am 41 and I am losing hope of holding a baby in my arms 🥺

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss. Please reach out if you need. 🙏🏻💜

[@sheilahernandez8197]

Love this video ❤ thank you very much ‼️I'm currently going through a missed miscarriage at 11 weeks , baby stopped growing at 7 weeks💔

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss. Please reach out if you need 🙏🏻💜

[@roxywells7875]

Same here. I should be 11 weeks but just been told baby’s heart stopped around 7 weeks and 3 days 😢 having a D&C on Thursday 😢

[@nativetruther1847]

Same here, I was 11weeks 2 days when I got the ultrasound. My baby stopped growing at 7 weeks 4 days. I am waiting for my body to go into labor. I am very sad. I've been waiting almost 2 weeks now.

[@zeytuna3240]

This is Exactly what happened to me now yesterday I heard this sad news and I still can’t process it and can’t believe 😢

[@kirbysiravo8478]

Thank you so much for this. Deciding between the 3 now for my 2nd miscarriage this year trying for our 3rd child. It’s such a hard decision

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry to hear of your losses Kirby. Take the time you need to heal. 🙏🏻💜

[@harjotkaur6352]

Lost my baby at 8.5weeks. It shattered me. I still can’t get over it

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss. I don’t think you’re meant to get over losing your baby. You just become strong enough to hold the pain and the love at the same time. 🙏🏻💜

[@mbc4823]

Thank you for this vídeo, I’m going through this right now, I shouldn’t feel so devastated because I’ve been through this, this will be the 6th time. I have a 7 year old boy, and I now I am so lucky but knowing that I’m already 39 and feeling this will be the last time I’ll be pregnant makes me want to wait for my body to react somehow… I’ve done dnc and cytotec, cytotec I find it brutal but I don’t know how long can I wait… All the love and thank you once again ❤

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry you’ve had to go through this so many times. It certainly doesn’t get easier. Sending you love and healing 🙏🏻💜

[@muengenkwanyuo4358]

So sorry

[@kaitlinjulieallport]

currently going through this now. Went on Friday to a&e as had some spotting and cramps. They done an ultrasound scan and could not see anything. So, they done an internal scan and said the baby was only measuring at 6 weeks although i was meant to be 10-11 weeks and that there was no heartbeat. I am devastated, this was my first ever pregnancy and i am struggling. They said i have to come back next Friday however i have been bleeding quite heavily and had pains for 2 days now. 😭😭

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss Kaitlin. It is heartbreaking. Please reach out if you need. Sending you love 💜🙏🏻

[@EbereCindy-b8y]

Same here I went to scan Nd they said z missed miscarriage I was told to come back with in two weeks To go to another scan

[@kaitlinjulieallport]

@@EbereCindy-b8y so I ended up going back and having to take misoprostol , the baby/sac did pass but then I ended up bleeding for weeks after. I found out I had an infection, their was black stuff coming out of me and horrible smell! I was put on antibiotics, went back a few weeks later due to still bleeding & they found out I had some retained product/tissue inside me, so I then had to have a d&c! I stopped bleeding a week after the procedure. So all in all, my missed miscarriage lasted from sept to 5th November, it was horrible. Definitely go and get scanned to make sure all is out, as I now have something called Hydrosalpinx (a blocked and inflamed left fallopian tube) from the infection I had caused by missed miscarriage

[@chidimmamandy7438]

Thank you so much ma ..had miscarriage on 25th of September bleeding lasted for 2weeks went for scan and it said no trace of pregnancy again and my doctor prescribed misoprostol i took the first two pills and it comes with so much cramps and no bleeding.......

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss. Sending you love 💜 Please reach out if you need 🙏🏻💜

[@syedaafshairfan5076]

My baby didn't got heart beat last week n doc said it's a missed abortion iam waiting for to get naturally out but I still have pregnancy symptoms

[@GurpreetKaur-en3vx]

Going through this 4th time…it’s soo painful emotionally more that physically

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry you are going through this again. The emotional pain is far worse. Sending you love 💜

[@GurpreetKaur-en3vx]

@@BettinaRae can u please tell me the basic reasons of missed miscarriage and how can I cope it up if I want to get pregnant again

[@ReginaOC]

Thank you for this video. Last time it passed naturally, today I’ve chosen medication. Happy to be at home and just breathing through it. This is shit, that’s for saying that! X

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry you’re going through this Regina. Please reach out if you need 🙏🏻💜

[@genevievejohnson1504]

Thank you so much for sharing this.

[@BettinaRae]

Sending you love 💜

[@hawa8880]

Going into the EPAS clinic tomorrow for consultation on my options. My doctor suggested D&C but I’m really scared. My heart is stuttered to pieces whet for my 8 weeks scan last week (Wednesday) and baby had no heartbeat I went of & did 2 more ultrasounds & still no miracle. I’m so broken to pieces I just can’t comprehend the pain..💔😰😰

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss Hawa. You are not alone. Sending love 💜

[@hawa8880]

Thank you so much.. God bless you for your compassion & for this informative video. What did it feel like to be under the anaesthesia? I’m really scared of what it might feel like. Does it feel like you’re asleep or do you feel self aware at the time?

[@BettinaRae]

@@hawa8880 Just like I went to sleep and then work up again.

[@Melanin360Studio]

. In June I had no period, took pregnancy test-negative. July I had a “period” and two weeks later had a “period”. Went to doctor in August for ultrasound, nurse didn’t say anything. Doctor didn’t say anything just scheduled me for a Hysteroscopy with D&C to get rid of loose tissue. Now period came a week earlier than expected and it’s HEAVY. Still not sure if I was pregnant 😢.

[@BettinaRae]

It can be very confusing. Sending 💜

[@flower18777]

Ive had recurrent losses, most recen was last month. I feel so inadequate and sort of ashamed. I might be developing anxiety now as I feel so empty.

[@BettinaRae]

I know that feeling too well. You are not inadequate. Spend some time now healing your heart 🙏🏻💜

[@san8431]

I'm currently going through this today. I found out at 11 weeks that my baby had stopped growing with no heartbeat at 8 weeks. I was given the option of medication and a d&c I chose the meds. This has been incredibly painful. A little question... I hade taken the pills vaginally at 9pm and cramped super bad at 1am then passed a huge clot at 9am. After I've had no bleeding is this normal?

[@BettinaRae]

It happens differently for everyone. Call your dr or midwife if you are concerned. Usually they will get you to come in for an ultrasound to check everything has passed. I’m sorry this has happened to you. Sending you love 💜🙏🏻

[@ashleighhudson9504]

Just had a missed miscarriage, I've already miscarriaged before. I'm 33 and I just feel so sad and that I don't want to go through this again :(

[@BettinaRae]

I am so sorry to hear you’re going through this Ashleigh. Please reach out if you need support. Sending love 🙏🏻💜

[@karmahleone1196]

D&C is the best option because it makes sure that everything is out

[@BettinaRae]

It doesn’t guarantee that but it is the most likely to yes.

[@vickiehawkins2930]

I’d be interested to hear your thoughts on the options I’ve been presented which are (the only difference being) d and c under LOCAL anaesthetic. Injecting the cervix with local repeatedly. I was/am astounded this is an option. Thankyou for your video x

[@BettinaRae]

It certainly happens. I feel this process might be more mentally / emotionally traumatic, although I understand why you may want to be conscious for the process. It is an intensely personal decision, but a d&c with local anaesthetic is one option I haven’t experienced so I can’t give you more specific information sorry.

[@vickiehawkins2930]

@@BettinaRae don’t be sorry! I think this is new since Covid at some hospitals. I agree I think the idea sounds very traumatic. But I really related when you said that someone might be thinking.. all the options are crap so shove them all. I’m definitely still in that camp so it was so nice to hear someone else might’ve thought the same xxx

[@reecaroach2269]

I am currently going through this. I choose to let my body pass it naturally. Losing my baby hurts so much

[@BettinaRae]

It does. I’m so so sorry you’re going through this. Sending love. Please reach out for support if you need 🙏🏻💜

[@lealopp]

I live in Estonia, and the system here is not so good. You do not have the option to choose. You are forced to do the medical way. But the sad part is you can not choose when. I got to know that my pregnancy had stopped developing on Thursday. I wanted to get it done, as it was too much to still feel pregnant but at the same time not be. But how it works here is that it is just counted as abortion. So, you have to sign an abortion form. They give you the first pill to stop the development of the pregnancy (yes, even if it doesn't develop anymore, you still have to take it). Then you have to wait 2 days, and then you have to go to the doctor, give the forms that you agree to pregnancy, and then you get the second medication. But when you get to know on Thursday, the next doctor's appointment is on Monday. So you have to wait 2 days before you can take the pill to "kill the pregnancy". And then wait another 2 days to go to the doctor and get the next set of pills. And here, you get 2 doses. You take the first one, and it starts the process. And after 4 hours, you have to take more and do it to yourself again. It was devastating. And doctors talk with you, "Well, the pregnancy was no longer developing, but even if it was, the first medication made it stop." It killed me mentally. The best part: you get off 1 day, the day you take the second medication. If you want to get 2 days off, you have to call another doctor, tell the whole story, and then you get 2 days, the one when you take the medication and the one after. So no time to process the info, no time to heal. I was lucky to be allowed to work from home and to heal, but the pressure to be back "functioning normal" is enormous. I just had to get it out. As you can't talk about it here. It is a taboo topic, and you are not encouraged to discuss it.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry that this was the experience for you. It’s my understanding that the medication is the same here too but there is no reason for them to talk about it to you in the same way as they would for someone choosing an abortion. I hope you’ve found someone to help you work through all the hurt this has caused. Please reach out if you need support. Sending love 🙏🏻💜

[@ishadhaliwal7886]

I am 8 weeks pregnant got to know my baby s heart beat stopped after 6 weeks sometimes I chose for d&C it’s on Thursday I don’t know where life is taking me . 😢

[@BettinaRae]

I’m sorry to hear this Isha. It’s a heartbreaking situation. Sending you love as you prepare for your procedure 🙏🏻💜

[@EbereCindy-b8y]

D &c is it surgery

[@USALifeDiaries]

How is the experience with d&c? How long did it take to recover?

[@ricksha0434]

I am 9 weeks pregnant but the baby measures only 6weeks since 2 transvaginal scans. Its my first pregnancy and very devastating, my husband is not talking to me, i can't discuss this with his unsupportive family, and i have only my mom to talk to. I am jobless and lost my baby, very traumatic. 😢

[@BettinaRae]

I am so sorry you’re going through this. Talk to your Mum as much as you can. Sending you love for healing 🙏🏻💜

[@Homemaker-eg2he]

i found out via an emergency ultrasound at 12 weeks the loss was at 8 weeks... this was number 4... im currently miscarrying i want to do it naturally at home...

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so so sorry for your losses. I hope it is over quickly for you. Sending love 🙏🏻💜

[@sammymallia]

I just went to a doctor to check if I was pregnant then had my ultrasound and there was no heart beat

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry to hear this. Sending you love 🙏🏻💜

[@FRANCESCA01234]

Had my 12 weeks scan and my baby stopped living at 8 weeks 😓

[@BettinaRae]

Oh hun. I’m so so sorry. Sending you love for healing. Please reach out if you need. 💜

[@FRANCESCA01234]

@@BettinaRae thank you 💐💕

[@BettinaRae]

@@FRANCESCA01234 You're welcome

[@USALifeDiaries]

What did u choose to do? 😢 How is the experience with d&c? How long did it take to recover?

[@FRANCESCA01234]

@@USALifeDiaries i hardly had any bleeding and no pain or infection, thank God. No issues at all. But emotionally it was very hard.

[@Rashonye]

Thank you so much for sharing ❤️

[@BettinaRae]

You’re welcome. Sending you love. 💜

[@josephinenelan4204]

I just found out yesterday, when I would have been 15 weeks… that sometime after my last ultrasound midway through 11 weeks… my baby stopped developing and was completely still, no heartbeat. I saw it sometime right before it passed, alive. And went 3.5 half weeks not having any idea. But very light bleeding the last three days. Was assured by nurses and the ultrasound tech that it’s most likely just from post mommy/daddy fun, and to not stress myself out. Well, I have two other children and this never happened to me with them, so for me it didn’t seem normal and I wanted to make sure. Aaaand, no heart beat, no movement, sized in the 11 week range. For me, with the size, I was given all three options but with an additional caveat that because of getting close to twelve weeks there’s a much higher risk for D&C no matter what. I just don’t want to wait for an actual month, and others around me are telling me naturally I would have more closure. It’s so hard.

[@missxtinabdbl]

So sorry to be sharing this experience with you, Josephine. I just found out Tuesday that our baby’s heart also stopped. My first experience after having a healthy pregnancy. Currently choosing to wait but have scheduled a vacuum for next Friday just in case it doesn’t happen naturally and just can’t wait anymore. Sending you a big hug and so sorry we’re both going through such a horrible time.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry to hear of your loss. There really is no “right” decision. Only right for you. Sending you love and healing 🙏🏻💜

[@josephinenelan4204]

@@BettinaRae nature made it for me, I passed my baby yesterday afternoon, was able to catch it. It’s a boy. But I still needed the D&C because I began hemorrhaging. So to the emergency room I went that evening. I got the best of both worlds. My bleeding and cramping are almost non existent today and I still have my baby to say my goodbyes to 💔

[@BettinaRae]

@@josephinenelan4204 I'm glad it is over for you now. Look after yourself now. Sending love.

[@MourineKerandi]

I lost my baby yesterday it was 8w4d its very painful i can't stop crying 😭😭😭😭i feel like i am not important anymore

[@BettinaRae]

I know that feeling but it is not true. You are so important. Sending you love and healing. Please reach out if you need 🙏🏻💜

[@rr12766]

Thanks for this video, im currently having my 6th miscarriage, usually i miscarry naturally, but this ones really hanging on so i have to decide which option to do. I think i will go for the vaccume /D&C

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your losses. Sending you love and healing 🙏🏻💜

[@rr12766]

@@BettinaRae thank you ❤️

[@USALifeDiaries]

How is the experience with d&c? How long did it take to recover?

[@syedaafshairfan5076]

It's very heart breaking. is pregnancy symptoms still b there when we are waiting for natural way to come out (expected management)?

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss Syeda. Yes it’s heartbreaking to still feel pregnant while knowing your baby is gone. Sometimes it takes a while for your body to realise. Sending you love and healing 🙏🏻💜

[@prettydiva595]

I had transvaginal ultrasound scan at 7weeks and was told it's just the gestational sac and it contains no fetal pole ...I waited 2weeks and did another scan ... same report of no embryo...empty...only to go for a dnc and the doctor saw the embryo ...the guilt ...I don't even know if it stopped developing or how it never showed up in the scan. I'm so depressed.

[@BettinaRae]

Ohh I’m so sorry to hear this. That sounds very confusing. Can you talk to your doctor and ask some more questions to help you understand?

[@sydneyfabxoxo1266]

Just found out I am having an early miscarriage. I am heartbroken. I wanted this so bad.

[@BettinaRae]

I’m so sorry for your loss. Please reach out if you need. Sending love 🙏🏻💜