BOLANLE CANADA TU ASIRI AWON DIASPORA MARRIAGE - AUNTY ADUNNI LIVE

[@patriciareindorf8380]

Both parties must respect and understand each other all round.

[@toerabeatrixkeni3262]

My husband was a very big support to my study during my nursing school. He helped me with whatever i want to do. he is a good good man

[@Adelajaking]

@@toerabeatrixkeni3262 God bless your home . I am sure that your man is not a angel , he has his shortcomings but you manage the home and the family . God bless you and angels will always be kind to you. Not your own making really, it's the way you were brought up, you look carefully before you married and you have a set mind to make the marriage work and the blessed husband always have the same feeling, making him to do all he can to make you glow. For coming here to celebrate your man ,God will bless you, his fountain of mercy will envelope you.

[@adebusayoaladegbola7063]

Aunty, that man that said the man must be responsible for the family upkeep 100% in USA lives in Nigeria. He has never been abroad all his life and l want to tell you that he is a man that is not even 10% responsible.

[@oliviayoung5393]

Yes, no wife-beating is allowed here like they do in the third world. I was assaulted in Nigeria, then here again, he wanted to continue his mess. I first separated my finances from his, then moved away wh when he traveled, got him to pay child support for years! He is being heavily chastised by God, even now! Wife mistreatment is of the devil! Thank God for these civilized countries!

[@Adelajaking]

@@oliviayoung5393 I don't support abusive situation but why don't you find way to manage his anger or whatever that is triggering such violence (if that is the truth). Why do you follow him abroad? Why not divorce him and find your level in Africa. How do u manage him back at home. You mean that the problem you are having in Africa, that you can manage ,that you can't help him to solve ,the best way to do it is to pretend that all is now well and start to speak grammar abroad. Olorun a Sanu wa

[@AmosIdris-x3o]

Church. Is. Another. Problems

[@patriciareindorf8380]

Brothers please listen to wise counsel. Women are complicated

[@opeolojo5978]

The man asking questions just kept on talking without giving aunty the chance to reply. Please listen & learn.

[@patriciareindorf8380]

The gentleman seems to be in shock.

[@toerabeatrixkeni3262]

Hello Aunty, in Europe they teaches during integrating program in schools and even in every social offices. The buttomline is to forgive each other no matter what. My husband brought me to Europe, there are some mistakes here and there but we chose to look Jesus on every situation.

[@nikkyjackson6500]

I respect the third caller.…. She is realistic and straight forward. Women over 40s should never marry down her points are valid 💯👌🏽

[@christianaholaleye7091]

It is not a pretense. It is called enduring. They fight it at abroad because they can thrive and survived unlike back in Nigeria that they see it as a taboo and they will take the children from her as children belongs to men back home or they abandoned the children with her to suffer together. There is always lemesis even back home.

[@Mummytiobad55]

Very good!!! No man should maltreat his wife! They chase everything in skirts and expect their wives to behave?

[@temitopeogunyemi6008]

Thank you mama for this program.

[@lizjohnson5998]

Women takes care of food and takes care of the children’s needs. I support the man who says he should take full responsibility.

[@Sam_Glaba]

This man is truly a good man. Men should not relie on their wife's money but the woman will support her husband in anyway and shape.... Any man that expect money from his wife will loose respect, the wife will definitely support his husband. That is a good man and a good home. Men should not expect much from their wifes, allow her to support you in any way she can but not expect her to support you 50/50...

[@anthoniaehikwe128]

Thanks, ma. Very well presented and factual 💯 💶 ❤❤❤🎉🎉🎉🎉

[@lizjohnson5998]

I disagree with Aunty for saying the commentator is wrong for taking full responsibility for his home. It has nothing to do with a woman is bad. If the woman has a better job and the man cannot carry it all, it is just reasonable for the woman to support fully.

[@taimai7148]

The point is, 95% of Nigerians don’t truly understand what marriage is about. How can couples not discuss finances either before or during marriage? This is just one of the many issues we face as a society. For example, in many Western cultures, a man might cook while the woman handles the cleaning, and they openly discuss how to manage shared expenses-like a $2,000 monthly bill-together. Marriage is about teamwork. Until Nigerians embrace this mindset, there will be no lasting peace. Couples need to sit down, establish a sense of dignity and belonging, and address these issues honestly. Lastly, it’s worth noting that many Nigerians don’t marry for love, which only adds to the challenges.

[@Kantz1]

@@taimai7148 When people quickly launch into comparing African lifestyle to the Western, it irks me. The African man or woman was born into an African family whereas from the onset, whites have been told to look after themselves. Dem nor get uncle, father, sister, or nieces in endless numbers that the married African woman or man has in her or his head and the houses back home to be built-that’s another level. How can you compare?! It’s just simple, mindless talk. Even common travelling back to see family, you think a white couple are thinking about that every now and then? No. Even your children born in America end up speaking your Igbo dialect. How?! But you fail to factor those things in, thinking you just land in America and automatically start being Onye Bekee?!

[@Adelajaking]

@@taimai7148 God bless you, God bless you ,God bless you again. The reason is always finance, the mentality of wastages, the mentality of living a fake life, the stupidity of trying to belong and maintain unafrican social status is the problem. Lots of Nigeria women don't understand or believe in Marriage . That is a fact that Nigeria men should admit and allow to pilot their life. They believe marriage is an orphanage institution to be taken care for wholesale especially when you have the police to call and mess up decades of hard work of your husband to collect welfare and social security . Nigeria men should have a rethink about the attitude of an average woman in Marriage . I think the Northerners are about fair , I may be wrong

[@akinsoladickson6284]

How did you arrive at your calculation that resulted in 95%

[@busayofadoju995]

You are 100percent right ma'am

[@mamaosun3587]

Not every woman pretends. It’s usually the treatment they get overseas that scatters every thing. Some men abuse their wife in Africa. She endures and forgives because he begs her, her parents will not allow her to divorce plus she cannot afford to care for the children by herself if she leaves. Overseas, she works, she can afford to care for the kids plus the government will help, the man can’t abandon the kids, he will pay child support. The police will arrest the man, if the man beats her up. Of course, if you insult her, she will give you back because she knows you can’t beat her up and not get into trouble. Some men don’t even give the woman money, and she knows if she divorces the man, the government will give her money that her husband is not giving her to look after the kids.

[@deborahemmanuel2381]

Well stated ❤

[@TrueTalkeTV]

Wise words....couples must be intentional about making marriages successful. Abusive/insensitive men get full payback when they relocate abroad

[@ProfSmith112]

If given MONEY'S is the foundation of love, why did women's not give to men in reciprocal.

[@saadatudaily]

That’s first man you hosted seems like a difficult man😂. I imagine myself having a quarrel with him

[@akibank2604]

The second caller made a good point at the beginning. His second point about sharing of household bills was completely wrong and l am happy the host didnt agree with him. One has to be very careful on the social media with the kind of advise one listen too.

[@olaoni4651]

Aunty , I just love your program, by balancing things

[@akibank2604]

The second caller made a good point at the beginning. His second point about sharing of household bill was completeltmy wrong and l am the host didnt agree with him. One has to be very careful on the social media with the kind of advise one listen too.

[@temitopeogunyemi6008]

The thing is we should love ourselves sincerely and be ready to be committed in our marriages; that is the only way we can be together forever.

[@nikkyjackson6500]

The second caller is right! You need to have the mindset of a provider if you want to be a successful husband. I am also based in the U.S. Your wife can help you financially to complete projects you both can work on future projects together but I believe A man should provide for his family. He is right 💯 I have so much respect for this caller

[@akibank2604]

The women should also provide financially in the western world. U go pay bills with me oo. I will never allow any woman to emotionally manipulate me.

[@Adelajaking]

Why is the case only about Nigeria women . We have other women from other tribes and Africa countries and they find a way to maintain their home. If you know you are having deep seated hatred against your husband , you don’t have to follow your husband . Don’t destroy the man and indirectly the home. Women gain better abroad than men . Look, it’s a loose loose game for Naija women. Nigeria man now travel, to settle down with other Africa countries ladies and abandon the wife in Nigeria. So many men even enjoy their life as single Dad rather than bringing a woman overseas. You can’t change an African man to European lifestyle especially in marriage. Thank God other ethnic tribes are benefiting from this adeko dere groups. It’s just pity that they block ways for responsible women to get or join husband abroad. No wahala . Men , enjoy your life jare. Don’t let anyone destroy you

[@temitopeogunyemi6008]

African women too are enjoying other men from other countries who are not proud, like Nigerian men, and they care for them sincerely. Secondly, taking women abroad is not by your making. If you don't take her, she will move herself. Women now are getting empowered and have more sense of reasoning.

[@Adelajaking]

@@temitopeogunyemi6008 I can see , Nigeria men are proud abi? . O kare, omo dada ni e.

[@tundeolateju2747]

God bless that nurse

[@adeolaawe2361]

"MUTUAL RESPECT" in Nigerian marriages? A big joke. Mostly, d husband is d boss, n d wife must be "SUBMISSIVE" The measure of d "SUBMISSINESS" of d wife is how much she can endure abuse n disrepect. She must look d other way as d "boss" cheats, bc its d right of d "boss" to cheat.

[@TrueTalkeTV]

Deduction from the male caller's words - he has a savior mentality and classic african patriarchal memtality where he believes in 'my way or the highway' He does not seem like the type who would be willing to bend a bit to show love and support to his wife. He is fixated on pain and grievance

[@adenikeadebiyi7768]

Ma you are talking , hundred percent correct

[@kennybankole4068]

Not necessarily that women are misled by friends. Some of the problems are escalated by the selfish family members back home. I have seen a father-in-law who told his daughter to leave her marriage after the father-in-law was invited to the USA, thinking his daughter is the one feeding the husband.

[@AmosIdris-x3o]

She. Is. 100. Right

[@adesolafalade3678]

Mrs Bolanle she telling the true.i had a friend from nigeria he brought his wife to USA he sent to school for nursing after graduated she changed .she called a police for her husband that she been her which lied the third times police finds out she lied.at end she was deported to nigeria and stayed abuja.Nigerian woman are changed whenever they got to Amrrica.i loves marrying America woman instead of marying to Nigerian woman.nigerian woman disobeyed our culture in abroad.

[@TrueTalkeTV]

Something is off about that caller..he is focused on grievance

[@nikkyjackson6500]

The second Man is highly intelligent! I love his mindset that women will lose respect for you if you can't provide. The presenter should understand that it's not a flex that a woman is taking full responsibility for her home. Being financially independent shouldn’t control your femininity.

[@joelawoyomi9102]

Hello Ma, the second caller was absolutely wrong, in fact he was the exception and not you. If takes two to tango, a good and virtuous woman would never allow her man to shoulder 100 percent responsibility of the household. And in any event, for the fact that you as a man has the mindset of doing everything doesn’t make your woman to be 100 percent faithful or loyal to you. It takes the grace of God to have a successful relationship between man and woman. No definite route to it. Please stick to your principles and beliefs Ma, these social media commentators most times see issues one way and consider them in that direction whilst not minding the possibilities of other views that are contrary to theirs. Keep up the good work and remain blessed.

[@lizjohnson5998]

Aunty please allow responsible men take their responsibilities and not make them feel their wives are bad for not fully supporting. Some husbands don’t even want their wife to work depending on how much they earn. If the man is earning well, they don’t even look at their wives money. But like I said, if they are both struggling, then they both work together in mutual agreement.

[@lizjohnson5998]

If the man is making up to $250k per annum, he should be able to take full responsibility for his family. The woman should support but not mandatorily.

[@Kantz1]

The man who said the man has to do 100% responsibility in the home lives on another planet!!! If I have to buy my wife’s respect, then that is not love. He’s a dreamer. I’m not in relationship to be a slave na. Obinrin tó jẹ́ pé kóo tó kú gan an, ó ti ń eye ẹlòmíì. Nonsense!!! Big time nonsense!!!

[@delefalusi5950]

There is nothing called 50/50 madame.The man is the head weather in Us/Nigeria .

[@toksjones7214]

Not true! You can buy house in both UK and US as long as you have job!

[@isaiah43100]

That is a real man talking! For you to avoid unnecessary drama in the home, don’t depend on your wife’s salary, and take at least 90% of the expenses in the home.

[@lizjohnson5998]

Do you see that our children who were raised here and married here are not having this problem?

[@akinsoladickson6284]

If both of you don’t have hidden agenda, the family won’t have any problem. What ever each of them has belongs to both of them. No one should be hiding things from the other, if there is true love.

[@akinsoladickson6284]

Please don’t use percentages in this discussion because you never know the number of married Nigerian couples in the USA. So, to say 75%of anything concerning marriages is wrong.

[@olajumokeaworeni5882]

True talk.

[@abelolasupo8722]

It's important for couples to discuss and possibly agree on what to take up in family finances to avoid unnecessary financial wastage. Once this is done, each party can do whatever he/she likes with the balance...he/she who works to make money should be able to spend!

[@adekoyaemmanuel7744]

God bless you Adunni ade. More wisdom. That man is talking rubbish.

[@hadexsunwealth6791]

Am sorry for this man

[@abiodunbabata8463]

Ni Boni Auntie Adunni ti ri Suru teni. yi o am surprised 😤😤Wahala okunri yi tipo ju ooh Jo bole nbe jare

[@phummzy]

My husband earns more than I do & we pay 50/50 towards rent & bills every other thing that comes up is on me. If we argue, it is always about money. He will say that money his is for him to spend alone & he's not his responsibility to take care of his wife. How do u expect such a woman to respect him. He prefers to give people back home money rather than dropping extra money for the house.

[@insidelife4554]

Take 💯 responsibility, while your wife is sending money to the boyfriend. Ds happened in Houston. The woman have a huge saving and the man has nothing. The woman still walk away.

[@tundeolateju2747]

The man should prepare for 100%, madam forgot in America you keep saying...you will create problem and you got to understand the journey of marriage

[@saadatudaily]

I see nothing wrong in ending a marriage that is not favorable. African culture does not support maltreatment of spouses

[@abimbolaabiodun9505]

Please either go abroad or do not treat your wife as you would like to be treated.

[@toerabeatrixkeni3262]

The mutual respect is to honor each other and don't ever think she is low or not equal, not being a dictator

[@adebello17]

Joint account will solve everything

[@blkwada]

This is an important discussion. I do not think the man hears himself. Talking over the moderator is a typical culture of some African men. That's why it always resulted in a shouting match. Very sad indeed!

[@tundeolateju2747]

Family structure of Africa is different from none African family.

[@tundeolateju2747]

Not maltreating. Nobody maltreat no one. It's total misused of opportunities, laziness, greediness and usual not thinking through consequences of the action. Women are carefully created by God...they are too emotional without thinking through consequences. Not all of them.

[@abimbolaabiodun9505]

If the man is biting up the woman physically and emotionally, how do you want the woman to respond, if not to call for help and calling for help means calling the police aboard. You can not keep calling your neighbor's all the time for assistance.

[@femimichael220]

lol I love this woman she must be from ondo kind of stubborn

[@abdelfataimohammed4793]

Honestly, this man is seriously in pain with the way these women are mal treating their spouses.

[@uchedome7853]

I know a lady in Houston who brought her husband in from Nigeria but now the husband is showing her sege. He is treating her like a slave and making her life hell and also cheating with other women.

[@oliviayoung5393]

I even got police to arrest the idiot two or three timed but he begged so I withdrew the case. But he continued to run his mouth and lack self-control. My patience finally ran out. I do not blame any woman who divorces the idiotic ones.

[@AmosIdris-x3o]

100. True

[@adebusayoaladegbola7063]

Hello ma, this man must have broken a lot of homes with his misleading contribution on your program this morning. I have never heard it anywhere that a man must be 100% responsible for family upkeep abroad. A lot of women that heard this will start putting up attitude at home. Please aunty, STOP allowing the egocentric type of man like this on your platform. All he wanted to tell the world is that he is making good money and who cares about whatever he is making? His information is seriously misleading and home breaking.

[@richman9116]

In this conversations, I really respect the youtuber Woman, she's very wise and knows better, good Job ma'

[@joelawoyomi9102]

Precisely, that second caller is a home breaker, views from people like him should not be aired regardless.

[@oluwakemiomobolaji8284]

It is good for this man when de get to abroad they are dated woman promise to marry her but later they will bring another woman After 5years marriage pafuka There are so many woman who want to marry But they will not go for it

[@femimichael220]

Madam you’re an African so you know what is African culture and if you don’t know take a look at Indian even abroad doesn’t change them

[@nexusfashion661]

They too divorce their husband. I know of couple of them in USA.

[@bomaoshunma5463]

O ga na true oh

[@femimichael220]

In abroad no body can carry whole things

[@tundeolateju2747]

Stop in abroad madam. You are not getting the levels at which the man talking about 100% is. Don't discuss division with your wife...she will naturally do more than 50%.

[@oliviayoung5393]

He did not bring me! We got our visas as individuals and came together, but the hypocrite never changed into a decent Christian man after we got here!

[@daveltn]

This man doesn’t understand women 😅! Naiive. The woman is giving valuable information and he is arguing… 😂

[@oliviayoung5393]

She doesn't need to hear from friends. She will be well informed from mass media, TV, school literature, education, etc. She will soon imbibe the western way of seeing respect for women in marriage.

[@tundeolateju2747]

That's not marriage...nobody is perfect, what about what women do to men too? Should they be carrying that mind of revenge? No Now. Don't marry wrongly...period

[@dorothyadeeko4996]

This man should learn to listen

[@lizjohnson5998]

No average woman will not put a dime like you said aunty. I don’t agree with you.

[@tundeolateju2747]

She will end up spending the money on the family.

[@frankfranklyn.o1447]

This guy is spreying rubbish

[@eyesofmedicineallaboutultr7837]

The woman wants to use her past marriage to deal with her present. Guess no man with her apparently... Well that's a sign of remaining single

[@labake1679]

Adunni learn to listen carefully to others views.

[@Olubunmi-l2b]

This your caller’s mind is messed up. He is very bitter.

[@tundeolateju2747]

Don't listen to this madam if you want a healthy marriage

[@tundeolateju2747]

Mind set...not really carrying 100%. This woman doing this program is far behind

[@ritchpoint]

This WOMAN, you narrated your story here when you got to America. I am surprised to hear from you that you don't believe in MUTUAL RESPECT because you're in America. ASIANS here still keep their CULTURE and they have a very low DIVORCE rate . You as a Yoruba woman is online to condemn CULTURE. Hmmm na waa for you!!

[@nikkyjackson6500]

The second caller is right! You need to have the mindset of a provider if you want to be a successful husband. I am also based in the U.S. Your wife can help you financially to complete projects you both can work on future projects together but I believe A man should provide for his family. He is right 💯 I have so much respect for this caller

[@MrRudesaint]

I love this as it will bring back polygamy! Because the truth is that many men today cannot provide for their families especially in this economy when there is no one to share the financial burdens with

[@joelawoyomi9102]

Rubbish contribution and submission!