BPD Relationships and Trauma with Skye Fitzpatrick

[@jesuschristthesecond]

talk starts 8:42

[@joejones4296]

Thank you for the presentation. I am surprised (maybe not) that there is little research on the impact that living with a BPD has on a loved one. I have been married to a BPD female for 30 years. About 15 years ago my wife went from being very emotional, but not mean, to being very emotionally, verbally, and sometimes physically abusive. I had to move out of our bedroom almost 2 years ago because she would wake me up at night to rage at me, and sometimes hit me. I have all four of the symptoms of CPTSD. She blames me for all of her problems and refuses to go to counselling again after walking out in a rage with two different counsellors. Interestingly she does not remember either of those events, but can remember every time I ever offended her and can recount them to the slightest detail. She is now divorcing me, which actually gives me some hope that I might live a normal life. I am currently attending a "Men's Distress Tolerance Group", via Zoom, with 6 other men who are married to, or are in a divorce situation with a BPD wife. Our therapist says that all of our stories of being abused are so similar that he cannot keep them straight. I go from feeling sorry for my wife and wishing she could get help, to wishing she would disappear so that my pain could stop. Living with a BPD is exhausting, frustrating, and painful. Any happiness is long gone. I don't recognize my wife compared to how she was the first 10-15 years together. She is cruel to me, but nice to everyone else. When I go to the forums on BPDFamily, I see similar stories. I will look for your research.

[@utubeJunkie3]

Thank you for your comments

[@spencercasen5037]

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[@nicholastitan2881]

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[@landrymark6427]

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[@pebblebrookbooks4852]

I'm ADHD and I have close friends with BPD. I like a lot of the BPD material it helps with Executive Function and Rejection Sensitivity. I wonder if we are Traits Of? Like we could benefit from some of the DBT modules too, huh? Ppl w/BPD are f*cking geniuses sometimes, you just have to ask them the right questions. 💖😎🙏