Breaking Down Expectations Placed on Hmong Dating and Marriage

[@Mints101]

In January I went to Thailand for the first time in 36 years. Met all of my aunt's and uncles, visited my grand parents graves. I went to my birthplace of Ban Vinai. It was so important for me find out where I was born. As soon as got to the entrance, I was going through my bag trying to get my camera out and the tears started rolling down. This is completely off topic, but you're going in April. Would love to see it.

[@clp480]

Just a thought: All my life, ever since I was a little girl, my mother voiced that she had to succumb to her life partner because of clan connections, family reputation, economic issues, bride kidnapping, etc. There were times where she remained with their abuser, all for the sake of saving face. Even now many of our aunties, sisters, mothers tell us to continue on this tradition. To marry the perfect Hmong guy/girl who understands Hmong culture, comes from a well established clan, and softly speaks to elders. But at the end of the day, is that all that matters? Marry someone who has the perfect public image for everyone to look up to and display your life for others to yearn even though behind closed doors things are not what they appear? Are we meant to fall into this same cycle decades later? What are our sons/daughters made for? Is this all that I was made for? This isn’t to hate on anyone who idolizes this lifestyle. I don’t blame anyone who does because it’s what we’ve been taught all our lives. At one point I did too. 44:00-48:00 “Just once, I want to be selfish in this area of my life. I want to madly fall in love with someone whoever that person is”. -Chef Yia Vang Couldn’t be more true.

[@nothing2lose428]

Follow your heart I agree with Pahoua marry someone who respects you, is supportive and appreciates you, Hmong or not whoever has the same values as you

[@takenname8053]

I remember my dad asking me if there were any girls I liked at school, black, white, etc. This was in elementary lol. Love my dad being an understanding OG

[@xia3]

Hi Hmonglish! I just found your podcast not too long ago and I wanted to let you know that I enjoy listening to every topic. You and your team are doing a great job! Although, 1 hour never feels long enough. I hope you revisit this topic and have the opportunity to delve deeper into issues that arise for Interracial Dating and Marriages in the Hmong Culture. One idea I thought that would be great in a future episode, juxtaposed to this topic, is the expectations or non-expectations on Married Hmong Couples in modern time. It will be interesting to hear different perspectives of what couples thought being married in the culture would entail and what it really feels like and if anything is as it was expected or not.

[@paulyang748]

Preserving Hmong Food is hard. Most of the younger crowd doesn't really eat it much. Rice Patties, boil pork, pickled mustard greens are the only few true Hmong food. Everything else has been adopted from other ethnicities.

[@paulyang748]

Relationships are hard. Same ethnicity of not. It really depends on your core values. I've seen other ethnicities who marry a Hmong person & doesn't have the same family values as their own. I've also seen Hmong couples who dnt have values aligned. Hmong ppl have big families & a ton of events. Just make sure your significant other share your own core values. With Hmong ppl, you marry their families also, not just the person.

[@iluvjdm2]

Brian Hoffman,man I believe this my school teacher back then. If this is you,Thank you for all you do! Wow I'm speechless,I cross path with you again except through social media haha. Wow I'm shock in so many ways! It great to see you again Mr. Hoffman!

[@ChristianGuy7000]

I'd not waste 1hrs watching this. They talk are so randomly, pick a subject and talk straight about it.

[@rosesakura6604]

As much as I’m a fan of Yia, I have to agree, this talk show is boring. I like when Hmong being more Hmong, than being too much white wash, while talking. Lol Sorry, not sorry.

[@ChristianGuy7000]

@@rosesakura6604 Yeah, as hmong they shall speak in hmong.