CALLOUS MAN - A Parody of Piano Man | David Cohen & Don Caron

Parody of Piano Man by Billy Joel - Lyrics provided by David Cohen - Performance by Don Caron | Executive Producers Don Caron and Jerry Pender
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LYRICS
by David Cohen
It's nine o'clock at his hideaway
The burgers and fries are flown in
There's a con man pacing nervously
Watching Fox and re-tweeting their spin
He says, "Sean can you air some chicanery?”
“I’m not really sure of the prose.”
“Then I'll send out some tweets, to help gin up the heat,”
“Before I am forced to depose.”
La, la-la, did-e-da
La-la did-e-da-da dumb
He strings them along, he's a callous man
Strings them along for spite
'Cause, they're all in the mood for debauchery
And he gets them amped up to fight
His lawyers by far are caught in a bind
They give him advice for a fee
And they're quick with a poke, or to send up some smoke
For paychecks that they'll never see
He says, “Hey, I believe they'll be grilling me"
As he pleads for more help from his base
"Well I'm sure that I could be a Russian Czar”
“If the Feds would get out of my face"
Oh, la, la-la, did-e-da
La-la did-e-da da dumb
Now he thinks he's a bona-fide populist
Who seems to have split from his wife
And he's hiding like crazy, some loans that are hazy
We hope that he gets ten to life
And his minions are practicing dirty tricks
As most if not all have been cloned
Yes, they're sharing concerns for their "Holiness"
And are scared to just stand on their own
Strings them along, he's a callous man
Strings them along for spite
'Cause, they're all in the mood for debauchery
And he gets them amped up to fight
It's a pretty sparse crowd for a Saturday
As he spews out more hatred that's vile
'Cause he knows those who came all want someone to blame
So he picks a new group to defile
And his words, they all stick like a barnacle
As his pulpit is used to spread fear
Yet they stand by this fraud with a view that is flawed
And say, “Man, we're so glad you are here.”
Oh, la, la-la, did-e-da
La-la did-e-da da dumb
Strings them along, he's a callous man
Strings them along for spite
'Cause, they're all in the mood for debauchery
And he gets them amped up to fight
ABOUT THE ORIGINAL SONG
"Piano Man" is a song written and performed by American singer-songwriter Billy Joel. As his first single in North America, it was included on Joel's 1973 album of the same name and later released as a single on November 2, 1973. The song is sung from Joel's point of view as a piano player at a bar, reminiscing about his experiences there and the people he encountered. "Piano Man" is based on Joel's real-life experiences as a lounge musician in Los Angeles from 1972 to 1973, which he had decided to pursue in an effort to escape his contracted New York City-based record company at the time, Family Productions, following the poor commercial performance of the album Cold Spring Harbor. Joel describes various characters, including a bartender named John and a "real estate novelist" named Paul, all based on real-life individuals.
Joel's first major hit and his signature song, "Piano Man" peaked at #25 on the Billboard Hot 100 chart in April 1974. Following Joel's breakthrough as a popular musician with the release of The Stranger, it became one of his most well-known songs. It is now a highlight of Joel's live shows, where he usually encourages the audience to sing the chorus. In 2015, the Library of Congress selected "Piano Man" for preservation in the National Recording Registry for its "cultural, historic, or artistic significance".

[@philipr1567]

Congratulations to David Cohen for the lyrics. And Don Caron's performance is outstanding.

[@davidcohen1044]

Philip, THANK YOU!

[@simonmultiverse6349]

Very good Callous Man. Here's something in the same vein: Kiss The Orange Goodbye ----------------------- A long, long, time ago I can still remember when the Donald used to make me cry. And I knew if I had my way, that he would soon be locked away To suffer and eventually ... die. Election season made me shiver Donald had to weep and quiver Bad news at the polling Would stop his campaign rolling As presidential hopes were bashed His tears upon the ground he splashed In agony his teeth he gnashed The day his hopes were dashed AND WE WERE SINGING... Bye, Bye, kiss the Orange goodbye His supporters really taught us he's a horrible guy And his followers won't look you right in the eye They're in league with the FBI

[@raishaferreira8099]

Lovely 💕 Thanks u

[@jim-se5xc]

Too good. Marvellous.

[@TaraLyon8]

I don't know which is which between David and Don. They work well in representing the current state of politics 👏.

[@bookbwitched6823]

🌿 I no longer can watch your vids, Don, without tears. I hear your voice & I'm immediately verklempt. Your lyrics assure me that you see & as the adult in the room, get it & stand for America. Don, I dont know why but you heal me. Blessings Music Man.

[@ParodyProject]

Thank you for the beautiful message.

[@bookbwitched6823]

@@ParodyProject 💋Impossible to thank one who gently comforts, affirms, & strengthens strangers. I am so grateful. Blessings to you, dear friend 🎈🇺🇸🎈

[@amelia1trekkie]

Thank you for the comfort these bring!. You are amazing

[@allenlovell1604]

Brilliant as usual! Can you take Roger & Hammerstein's classic " The Mikado " ? I think a parody would be perfect ! My apologies if it's already been done .

[@joyceroberts3886]

I don't know if lyrics choose the song, or if the song chooses the lyrics, but this marriage was fantastic.

[@davidcohen1044]

THANK YOU! Your comment is very much appreciated.

[@joyceroberts3886]

@@davidcohen1044 My pleasure

[@HelenaWilliams8696]

D. Cohen's lyrics convey poetic beauty full of expression. D. Caron executes a pristine and grandiose voice, with a beautiful tone, great diction, volume, timbre, and does a magnificent performance.

[@davidcohen1044]

Helena, thank you so much for your comments. I particularly agree with your take about Don's voice. It always has a smooth and soothing quality that help make the parodies he does so easy and fun to listen to.

[@JootjeJ]

Gorgeous song, brilliant adaptation! From our side of the world we really don't understand why he's still not in jail.

[@froglady7491]

He may never actually go to jail. How can the Secret Service protect him there. But if we can prevent him from ever holding office again, we have a win. If he has to declare bankruptcy, even better.

[@melissalittle4369]

@@froglady7491 - Guantanamo. His family could also be incarcerated there - we are a compassionate people. Melania can join them, too. What a crappy assignment for the Secret Service. Maybe send the guys who support IQ45. Let their families come, too, and send home-schooling materials from a liberal state.

[@Washougalite1]

​@@melissalittle4369 Alcatraz is empty, and they just recently stopped doing public tours. Enough room for everyone. Let them roam free. Where are they gonna go? 😂😂😂

[@melissalittle4369]

@@Washougalite1 - 🤣🤣🤣 - And wouldn’t they love being (sort of) San Franciscans! Maybe Gavin Newsom and Nancy Pelosi can visit them in prison, or just wave from the mainland.

[@froglady7491]

You all have great ideas, but I don’t think I would support Melanie going, unless she wants to. Seems like isolation would be good for him.

[@marianlincoln9008]

I've always loved the ORIGANAL...And this is a Phenomenal Appropriate Rendition for today's Political Malfeasance perpetrated on the American people... Thank You for sharing your INCOMPARABLE talent GETTING the TRUTH ACROSS....

[@lavielemond]

Haha, all of this from a person who is unable to even spell the word "original" correctly...nice one, Marian!! Do you also cackle madly like your hero, Commie-la, perchance?!

[@ernestheau9146]

Beautiful parody of a beautiful original. Don Caron's singing both baritone and tenor was great.

[@froglady7491]

Without naming any names , he gets his point across.

[@emilywong4064]

He is right on the Money

[@patriciavyce7942]

❤️🌎🕊…

[@revolution51]

The poor brainwashed man.

[@faithhope310]

I love is so we’ll done; this is a genius lyrics ; we Al get the messages without names, the evidence’s are so clear. The Amazing piano and the lyrics doesn’t divided us an American 🇺🇸 only makes us to reflect in that importance that hate and divisions is not the pathway to rebuild the DEMOCRACY IN THIS WONDER COUNTY TO STAND FOR FREEDOM A DEMOCRACY TO LEAD THE WORL❤

[@sharonbiddle2344]

He sure does!!

[@georgelayton6641]

"La-la did-e-da-da dumb" LOL

[@davidcohen1044]

George, thanks for noticing the "b"

[@jeannedouglas9912]

Thank you for taking the time to expose the crime and not even asking for a dime.🎉🎉🎉

[@LazyIRanch]

There have been great songwriting duos throughout the ages; Rodgers and Hammerstein, Lennon & McCartney, Simon & Garfunkel... "Cohen and Caron" are carrying on great musical tradition! 💕😍♩♪♩♬ ♬♩♪♩

[@bjspeck4337]

Lord, I'm going to sleep well after that. Big smile on my face.

[@raishaferreira8099]

Lovely! 🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷💙

[@i_am_a_freespirit]

Wonderful lyrics, thank you so much.🥰

[@MBihon2000]

Such a great musical lyrics and composition, "The Con Man"! Bravo! More talented people coming out, thanks Lil Donnie!

[@PhineasPhule]

Once more, a home run; Don, your performances are up there with Mark Russell ( this is a definite compliment). Kudos and props to all involved.

[@TampaDave]

And up there with Tom Russell.

[@eliseh.7474]

'Tis true, 'tis very, very true. Superb, as always, Don. Thank you. ❤

[@philippapay4352]

This is perfection in defining the "call and response" of our next 18 months or more from these impotentates & their wastrels.

[@azambresonia5056]

He did get his point across....Bravo! Greetings from Hamburg Germany

[@raishaferreira8099]

🌎🌎🌎🇱🇷🇱🇷💙💙

[@tamarrajames3590]

This is absolutely sublime Don…and David, it sits among your best. Viciously sharp and pointed…and delivered with a gentle tune. Bravo!🖤🇨🇦

[@davidcohen1044]

Tamarra, THANK YOU for the kind words. Very much appreciated.

[@tamarrajames3590]

@@davidcohen1044 You are most welcome, your collaborations with Don are brilliant…satire at its best. Wishing you much success.🖤🇨🇦

[@leoniekutsch5375]

To the point but always decent 😊

[@EmilyWilkie-323]

I never tire of listening to your great songs !! Thank you again !!

[@daleigou943]

Encore! Please do this again and again!

[@WooWooGirl]

Brilliant as ALWAYS! I adore Parody Project. Incredibly brilliant troubadours.

[@tajhayes7841]

THIS guy IS a TRUE GENIUS!

[@rogerstanton8192]

Just bloody brilliant !! get the blimp !!

[@bcshelby4926]

...bloody spot on.

[@mrbillmacneill]

epic version of a classic old son!

[@rondusseau8802]

Again and again, I really enjoy listening! Thanks for expressing the feelings that so many of us have.

[@judithchiasson8554]

perfect song! beautiful singing voice! amen!!

[@Old52Guy]

BRILLIANT! Up until this moment the day has been crappy. You just turned this around. Thanks!

[@richjones5432]

Stunning piece of wordsmithing.

[@davidcohen1044]

THANK YOU!

[@Carol120454]

One of my favorite songs, and I love your parody!

[@tonitouchberry6257]

😂😂😂 I wasn't expecting this in the mix, but a big "ok 👍" from me!

[@marshagoldstein2434]

Thoughtful, provocative, and as always, on point!

[@themousethatroared3371]

Everything you do is brilliant but this.. this is STELLAR! ❤❤❤❤

[@bobbermichaels8067]

AMEN !

[@ProgressiveDemLib]

Ultra talent on full display❤❤❤ Always spot on about what we are enduring. Vote blue everyone 🗳️🗳️🗳️🗳️🗳️🗳️💙💙💙🎉🎉🎉Thank you!

[@hannaleppala9630]

Thank you Don, excellent, as always. And the same to David for unbeatable lyrics. Your cooperation with him is so fruitful.

[@davidcohen1044]

Hanna, THANK YOU! Your kind words are very much appreciated.

[@dbeard359]

Brilliant and cover as usual. Never stop. These parody’s are a highlight for me. Thank you Don

[@deborahmitnick]

Not too subtle and just wonderful. ❤️❤️

[@jochesson2312]

One word - brilliant. 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

[@impunitythebagpuss]

Good on! Thanks!

[@VioletBunny1]

Excellent rendition of this Billy Joel song, kudos to the lyricist!

[@hieroglyphictributes6795]

Thank you for the captions 😁. I joyfully sing along. 😉

[@jeanengstrom1267]

Best parody of Agent Orange thus far, for the rhyme proximations and ferociously funny & appropriate lyrics. 💖🎶💖🤣👍

[@rridderbusch518]

My new favorite! :-*

[@arcar66]

Don....You are a National Treasure. BRAVO!! and thank you...

[@elibedard6373]

Thank you so much for this!

[@andrewskinner8560]

You're the man Don brilliant job.

[@loyi-kyong]

Yet another great rendition of superb lyrics to a familar song. You guys are impressive and so on point! 👏👏

[@Salieri47]

Another homerun, thanks & congrats to everyone involved!

[@tracybarrack]

Thanks!

[@marshahowes8756]

Love Piano Man as well as your parody. You NEVER disappoint. BRAVO❤👏👏👏👏👏

[@paulcliffe395]

BRILLIANT!!!

[@wiredcoffee9347]

This video is a great beginning of any day.

[@loritracy1385]

Beautiful. Thank you🌺

[@dennisbeaver5958]

Just Too much! This is terrific!

[@carolynmeinung1286]

Just perfect.

[@drnancysjohnson3844]

This one is a home run hit out of the park. This is one of your very best & you hit all the right points perfectly. Thank you so much. You give solace to our weary souls re Mr. Trumps endless blather about himself 24/7.

[@pbrn1729]

This is so fantastic 🎉🎉😂

[@RebeccaTreeseed]

CNN oughta put this on for 90 minutes.

[@harrietharlow9929]

Absolutely fabulous, David and Don!🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@buddyneher9359]

Might even inspire Billy Joel to write something new! Thanks 💕🎶

[@OhioDemocrat]

Outstanding, Thank you!

[@crowredrose]

Beautiful.

[@Leon-ym9qm]

This is low key brilliant! Well done.

[@sheilawinston4739]

Brilliant!😊💙💙💙💙💙💙

[@sudcciv6443]

Awesome lyrics as per usual! I sure Billy Joel appreciates this "upgrade" of one of his first songs! ;)

[@Ishmael_Maria]

Waaaww beautiful.What a voice❤❤❤❤❤

[@joanhyde1745]

On point!

[@MichaelSperry-v5s]

I admire and enjoy your genius. Thank you 😊

[@fr57ujf]

Great lyrics!

[@jntlfurystoan8304]

❤ you are awesome! Ty

[@marionmorgan5972]

You hit the nail on the head!

[@2FollowHim777]

So true. Put well. The excellence is astounding.

[@charlescanzater]

Excellent ! So well done sir thank you from Stjohn Virgin Islands

[@c.sc.9353]

Just listened to this again - brilliant!!!

[@joancairns9846]

Great job. Excellent lyrics, David. A lot of cleverness in this song. I did smile at the 'b' in 'da da dumb'.

[@davidcohen1044]

Thanks Joan, I really appreciate your words and also the fact that you noticed the "b" added to the end of dum.

[@katnap9189]

Excellent!! You combine great songs, with truth lyrics, and great singing. BRAVO!!

[@gwencrockford3848]

"We hope he gets 10 to life" 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 At least 10 to life, LOCK HIM UP! KICK HIM UP!!!

[@VooV830]

Excellent 👏 🤓

[@delythdavies5194]

Spot on!

[@glennjarvis2672]

Once again a performance and the lyrics are well done! Thanks Don!

[@izzaduck8896]

Brilliant! Love the lyrics and rendition - bravo!

[@aninasalerno873]

Great job!

[@Northcountry1926]

It’s Nine O’clock and the Ketchup covers the Walls 😂

[@plantlord3266]

another brilliant and truthful song-genius keep up great work

[@Jpudgy5]

Beautiful song!! 😍

[@laidman2007]

Musician and lyrics are terrific.

[@charleshiggie7034]

Excellent, great job!

[@lbrowning2543]

What a great parody, and piano! Thanks for the words. I doubt the callous man understands many of them.

[@PatriciaReyes-tf2mq]

Thank you. The beat is certainly a great way to start the day! Wonderful, 😊 and I love all of your performance.

[@Dalekzilla]

Just fantastic! You are a huge talent.

[@justsittingherethinking2530]

I'm loving all of these songs! Really well done, I'm sharing these. Thank you!!

[@nanacheese9135]

From a Canadian fan,I thank you for your mastery and ability to keep us laughing while we all await the results of Nov 5.💙

[@emilywilkie390]

Great song !! The hits keep coming for our enjoyment !!

[@denisemcdougal6445]

Perfection. Thank you !!!!!

[@lauradentonbday7750]

Another brilliant take down, love your work 🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺

[@MsKScreations]

Such great parodies, thank you! Well sung too!

[@zeldamudd]

You've done it again°!! Thank you!

[@Opinionated181]

I know that the song Piano Man is before my time, but I have always been a fan of Billy Joel's music and this is an excellent parody of a classic!

[@dejapoo5508]

Spot on as always , we love to see " President Turd " roasted on this side of the Atlantic as well .