Classic Kermode: Charles Dickens's England

[@TulseLuper]

Nearly a decade later and this is still one of my favorite rants. If you can find it, watch a video called something like “Top 25 Moments of Derek Jacobi in Charles Dickens’s England.” I don’t think it’s still on KZbin but it’s hysterical. The two moments Kermode described are 100% accurate and they aren’t even the funniest bits. You almost feel sorry for Jacobi because it looks like the director didn’t know what he was doing. Half the time, Jacobi just wanders off camera awkwardly once he’s done speaking.

[@jamestaylor1541]

Thank you for recommending the top 25 moments video, absolutely hilarious

[@deepzepp4176]

@Ewan Callister So many rants to chose from, but my favourites have to be - Seven Pounds, Sex and the City 2, Bride Wars, Charles Dickens's England and Pimp.

[@pocketsteve]

I remember listening to this review on their podcast a week after it aired and I could not stop laughing. The funniest review I think he's ever done, and even surpasses Danny Dyer and Pirates. 14 years late, but thank you for posting this!

[@somanytakennames]

TWO HOURS! TWO HOURS! How long? TWO HOURS!

[@PauLtus_B]

+somanytakennames It sounds exactly the same all 3 times.

[@ZuluRomeo]

Somebody needs to make a YT loop of that over (yes) TWO HOURS

[@SevenEllen]

At one point At one point At one point

[@oliraceking]

@@ZuluRomeo There you go kzbin.info/www/bejne/nXOYm2qVbLR7aKM

[@ZuluRomeo]

I have only myself to blame. 😜 kzbin.info/www/bejne/nXOYm2qVbLR7aKM

[@51yourtimeisup]

at one point, at one point, at one point.

[@Onmysheet]

Brilliant rant. I was outside today trying to stop laughing because i couldn't stop thinking about it.

[@obscureentertainment8303]

I was like that this morning. I kept scratching and rubbing my face to try and hide my giggles.

[@TulseLuper]

Onmysheet There's a compilation of Charles Dickens's England on Vimeo. Oh man, Kermode wasn't kidding!

[@dvg87]

+Onmysheet one of his best rants undoubtedly

[@vanessaheine8093]

It’s the “drrry white wine” that did me in.

[@RockBottomRiser21]

"I can't think what he would have made of it now!" "What does that even MEAN???"

[@MatthiasAletharch]

An absolutely classic review. I've found myself using Mark's high-pitched "What does that even MEAN?!" as a general expression of exasperation more than once since I first heard it.

[@PixelatedHarry]

Let's watch Charles Dickens's's's's's Englandland! Brilliant.

[@antoinepetrov]

4:16

[@W00DSMAN]

I'd pay good money to have Kermode do an audio book reading just about anything in his Derek Jacobi impression. This shit cracks me up every time.

[@wormswithteeth]

Malthusian Epoch Gotta light?

[@BobChillison]

@@wormswithteeth this is the waterrr

[@declancochran2882]

mark kermode shoehorning the concept of tax returns into his reviews is a pleasure i hold in the same esteem as peanut butter on toast, or a nice walk through a copse on a sunny day

[@QuietBatperson96]

You can hear the tone of annoyance in his voice when he says "Dorrit".

[@alanwakeish]

Mark Kermode and Simon Mayo, the best double act of the 21st century.

[@HangTheDJ16]

I've just looked up 'Derek Jacobi's 25 Best Moments from 'Charles Dickens's England'' on Vimeo and I nearly died from laughter just having watched this amazing rant!

[@RockBottomRiser21]

My absolute favorite Kermodean rant. Thanks for uploading!

[@fizzywack]

Absolutely hilarious!! Definitely one of my favourite Kermode rants!

[@TheKamikazenaz]

We know what Derek means.. #casual

[@alanwakeish]

Maybe there will be a big multimillion action blockbuster remake of Charles Dickens's's's's's's's's's's's's's's's Engerland to be announced at next year's comic con.

[@ThisCharmingMan1984]

Stephen Robinson Directed by Michael Bay, and starring Danny Dyer as Derek Jacobi...for TWO HOURS!!!

[@Sapphonouveau]

I can't believe I've now listened to this three times in a row. I think it's the way he says "TWO HOURS" in *exactly* the same tone THREE times.

[@rowanc88]

I got the DVD from my local charity shop yesterday. Pray for my soul.

[@jondellar]

I miss the more combative, slightly anarchic feel that these earlier Kermode/Mayo reviews had.

[@B1ggu5]

"How long?"

[@Peadar2000]

Simon Mayo is a criminal for incessantly interrupting Mark in one of his best rants ever.

[@B1ggu5]

I can feel the waft from the flappy hands coming off my laptop!

[@TulseLuper]

I vote this as the greatest Kermodian rant of the year.

[@DanCookMovieReviews]

The mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmost incompetent presenter. My favourite ever Kermodian Rant

[@raisedonpopcornwithgrant9670]

top 10 greatest dr. kermode rants ever!!! the derek jacobi impression 😂

[@seanch782]

Oi, leave Look East out of this

[@Prolix8]

MINUS FIFTEEN

[@Onmysheet]

He said fifty.

[@Prolix8]

You are correct indeed. My bad.

[@wormswithteeth]

Here is a correction that Hugo Malim requires. Who knows who will correct him next.

[@jhwalsh93]

This review is just genius

[@ZuluRomeo]

One wonders if Simon Callow, himself a huge Dickens devotee and scholar, might have been a better choice of presenter.

[@orkavorn]

This is definitely one of his best!

[@mrkeogh]

When Kermode goes into triple repetitions...

[@glycerine139]

his imitation of Derek Jacobi is his best yet.

[@ChrisLitzenberg]

TWO HOURS! TWO HOURS how long? TWO HOURS! hilarious!

[@QuietBatperson96]

The title is actually grammatically correct. The single apostrophe with no “s” is only used to denote a possession if the word ending in “s” is a plural. There is only one of Charles Dickens, hence “Charles Dickens’s England”.

[@MsDormy]

Hilarious!! Love it!!

[@joshdaws1151]

Dickens's is the grammatically correct way of spelling it. You put an apostrophe at the end for plurals, e.g. the dog's bone (for one dog) or the dogs' bone (for multiple dogs). Therefore Charles Dickens' England would imply there's more than one Dicken, which isn't a thing.

[@Goochbot]

Directed by Gore Verbinski

[@TheGava4]

02:52??😡😡 Mayo stops a genius rant to got to “John Pindar” about David Cameron..l?? WTF?

[@TulseLuper]

For some reason, they didn't edit that bit out of the podcast. I remember listening live at the time, and there was some bullshit going on with David Cameron and the BBC had to cut away. This time at least, it wasn't Mayo's fault.

[@anthonybradley1555]

i thought mayo said john pienaar which would make sense as he is deputy political editor for bbc news right now, so it seems highly likely back then he was at the bbc.

[@LisssRose]

Whuddawhat does that even MEAN?

[@TulseLuper]

How did this not make Kermode's Top 10 rants of 2009? I put it above Transformers 2.

[@wormswithteeth]

Mark Kermode/Mark Wahlberg at the end. 😂😂😂

[@neilevans8204]

TWO HOURS!!!

[@bartmann81]

How long?

[@kennethmccrindle8886]

TWO HOURS!!!!

[@SkinnyEMedia]

Quintessentially and stereotypically British as you can get. And not necessarily the most flattering depiction of Britain with its income inequality and look at dire conditions.

[@lizziebooth5397]

One day I'll stop watching this. Today is not that day.

[@lizziebooth5397]

Not today, either 😉

[@shugaroony]

@@lizziebooth5397 Still watching? ;)

[@lizziebooth5397]

@@shugaroony oh yes

[@bartmann81]

How long?

[@TheNegativeOptimist1]

'WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN!?'

[@TulseLuper]

Because he's a critic and it's his job to see everything on general release. I don't think he has any biases against Dickens (or Derek Jacobi for that matter), he just really didn't like it.

[@TulseLuper]

You're not the only one.

[@TulseLuper]

@MorticeUK Kermode can be closed-minded but I don't think that's the issue here. Dickens was indeed an interesting figure but watching a Shakespearean actor wander around London isn't my idea of enlightening.

[@orkavorn]

Somebody gag Mayo.

[@adamtzsch]

Brilliant

[@krisj827]

Written by Zack Snyder.

[@randomisraelite]

watch pain and gain review

[@dullroar2673]

and HEYUH

[@dvg87]

hmmm is Helen Mirren LOL

[@kohaylan]

@TulseLuper It's a shame he hasn't yet grasped English grammar.

[@TulseLuper]

Haha maybe it's because it's one of his only impressions that actually sounds like the subject.

[@felyxmillicent6538]

Way too funny.

[@Raymint]

@derami100 At one point! At one point! At one point, right ...

[@gman8471]

@glycerine139 It sounds more like Simon Callow in Four Weddings and a Funeral.

[@MagikGimp]

And then they made loads of stuff like this for the cinema. :/

[@PurushaDesa]

Mm. His impressions are... impressionistic as opposed to naturalistic.

[@RockBottomRiser21]

3:42

[@jacklawrence2212]

Mayo's witless wind-ups... I wish he'd just shut up.

[@TheLightofAniu]

I find this sort of criticism in very bad taste, of course, two hours in a cinema would be tiring to watch a television program, but don't forget that they sometimes host the Rugby Union in the cinema, in 3D, but come on, this is hardly fair. I don't know if this gentleman likes Dickens' life or his experiences, but for heaven's sake, why go to it, if you think it was going to be boring in your mind?

[@mataphysicalclub]

I enjoyed it so much so I hired it from the local (librairy) I thought did a great job,whats this chaps problem, i don't understand his real point. I say old boy could you of done this better clown!

[@adoculos4521]

THANK YOU. The main point is though, that most of the posters are kiddies and haven't even watched the DVD. I HAVE. Yes, it's a bit slow sometimes but is not a minus -50 or anything like it. Kermode, just like his fan base, is a child. So much so, he's embarrassing.

[@JD-uu3xm]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/hZmpkIiAoK15npo A Joy.

[@nomoreheroes93]

This hatred of "TV movies" makes you wonder how Kermit is coping with the advent of Netflix made productions

[@TulseLuper]

Does he still hate TV? I don't listen much anymore. Lately, Kermode seems to go where the current tells him, so he's probably eased up on his dogmatic stance on TV. It helped that his Spinal Tap hero Harry Shearer apparently made him look like a fool on the subject live on air.

[@gman8471]

It's so funny how petulant he gets at having to watch something that isn't a film. Never mind it maybe being a chance to broaden his horizons by learning something about Dickens - no it's not a film, it's a TV program, I'm a film critic, no good!

[@MorticeUK]

one word comes to mind here "Narrowmindedness" another is "shallow" Methinks that Mr Kermode stopped learning at about age 15 and gets on in life by just being forcefull in his rants in an overpowering way.

[@bartmann81]

How long?