7 Things “Nice Guys” Say That Turn Women Off

[@shadowtango]

Overall: 1. If you think you deserve something because you're nice is entitlement - Don't. Be yourself, be kind remove the sense of entitlement and live. 2. Don't be a constant yes man. Communication is clear, don't be combative/argumentative. 3. Don't overload on the excessive compliments - example 5:49 - 6:00. Be yourself, be kind and of course give compliments that are genuine like the looking good in with their hair, clothing, etc. Find balance 4. Over-apologising - example: 7:32 to 7:40 apparently gives a sense of insecurity of being unsure, etc. helpful tips 8:45 on wards 5. Putting yourself beneath her - Easy fix personally, you're human, everyone is human, we are flawed beings its how we are. Own it and understand that there will be people who deem themselves better out of ego never give them that satisfaction. of course listen to Courtney's advise as well treat each other as equals. 6. Overtexting/overinvesting too soon - with a new relationship go with cruising speed, don't spam texts/calls let things evolve naturally, live your own lives as well and be respectful as we are all busy. 7. Claiming you're not like other guys - kinda relates to the first point. it focuses more on the past relationship than the present relationship. Have your actions represent who are you as a person. Be YOU. 8. Be a Good Man your actions and words should be the same don't give yourself a title - like nice guy, alpha, etc. A Knight doesn't call himself a knight others do due to that persons mastery of ones self. You are welcome. (I did add my own input and definitely watch the video as i just did a generalised version)

[@Joshua.Carrasco]

Thank you

[@wcg19891]

I don’t think that guys who are complaining that women date jerks feel any more entitled to a relationship than a jerk does. They simply are frustrated. Frustrated that women go for qualities they don’t have It’s perfectly okay to feel that frustration. And it can be dealt with in a number of ways including walking away or just becoming a jerk too. But what is the key point is that you don’t show to a woman that you feel that frustration. Women don’t want honesty. They want strength and confidence.

[@directorchris2]

if Yoyr R Bysy Don T Sent Billz Over

[@DavidZ4-gg3dm]

Will that get you same-day lays?

[@garypierce7380]

Now I feel like I wasted my time watching the video....except for Courtney's hot sweater.

[@Edu-Mau]

"To attract women, do this or that".. am I the only one who gets tired just by reading this?

[@LordVader5738]

Yup. And have you noticed its always us [men] that need to change something? Like damn, I can't even be me anymore if I want to date lol legit, that is a big reason why I stay single.

[@charlesmerritt52]

Eff-em.

[@TheyCallMeSledge]

@@Edu-Mau I gave up on that guidebook the moment I hit 30. I just do what I feel like and funny enough I've gotten more attention from women by being unapologetic and selfish. I would say it's weird how they're wired but I personally don't give a damn.

[@brandonbennett4615]

Its a fish teaching you how to fish. All of this is subjective.

[@Littletime839]

Yes because you are genuine and don't want to pretend to be something else

[@TheColtonStreeter]

Its not that i expect something from kindness, but the lack of appreciation is frustrating

[@danjenkins21]

Yes. Exactly. If there's no appreciation coming from the other person your being kind to then it does get pretty frustrated and makes feel like not doing anything more for them.

[@Ronniezim]

You shouldn’t expect appreciation for doing what is expected/required. Do you expect appreciation for getting out of bed in the morning? I hope not…it’s just what you do

[@davidkevin03]

Reason 6. Fellas, if someone consistently takes more than 24 hours to respond to your messages without a valid reason or effort to explain, it’s often a sign of low interest. Most people check their phones regularly, even during busy times, and someone who values you will likely prioritize replying or at least communicate delays. While occasional late replies can happen due to life circumstances, consistent lack of effort or engagement usually means they’re not interested. If you notice this pattern, it’s a good idea to move on instead of chasing someone who isn’t reciprocating your energy

[@elijahtipping4802]

EVERYONE needs to read this. Even those that are in a "relationship"

[@RealCourtneyRyan_OnT-elegrem]

I would prefer if we have private discu-ssion.

[@iunnor]

Not necessarily true. Sometimes you just have rough/busy days where you don’t feel like having a topical conversation with someone you’re getting to know. A better sign is to evaluate what kind of energy they respond with and how considerate are they when they do respond. But i agree, if they text incredibly slow all the time, expectations should be tempered.

[@davidkevin03]

@@iunnor I agree. At that point they’d communicate with you about it.

[@ZWarrior89]

Or replying to you with only one word answer.

[@bigsauce1116]

No.1: be attractive and she'll thow all her standards out the window

[@nat_wiled]

I have tried this.. posted by beach and gym photos and suddenly...

[@MrLamontSanford]

Bingo! That's all!

[@Rider-hh9it]

100% right on. Courtney is talking about the 5% of sincere women out there, the women like her. The remaining 95% of single women are do not care if a man is hard working, loyal, trustworthy etc.. Show up with a indifferent attitude and in shape and you’ll be kicking women out of your bed.

[@Asana25]

Bingo. I am willing to bet that 75% of her viewers are sub5s that don't know (who don't know it yet) they're cooked unless they get much needed plastic surgery (assuming the flaws are beneath the skin)

[@benster5]

Bonus points if you're at least 6 feet tall and even more bonus points if you make a lot of money.

[@anthonyjordanmoviesandmore2470]

Over apologizing comes from a prolonged living experience where you're treated like a screw-up you're always living on pins and needles waiting to just get the blame for something and the apology is a defense mechanism

[@TomPlantagenet]

And dealing with people who aren’t graceful

[@djntu2964]

Exactly. She’s is wrong about that. It’s not an insecurity.

[@aaronkelley3865]

Just don’t give a f*ck. Problem solved. She’s not wrong. Quit apologizing all the damn time.

[@ianpage2509]

@@djntu2964I think it’s both.

[@nykia31]

“You’re so nice.” Often isn’t a compliment. What they really want to say is that you are not attractive, you’re not interesting and something about you feels “off”

[@neutechnica]

As a former nice guy, I'm of the mind that it doesn't need to be a complement. It's a neutral way of communicating a boundary. While I never acted out on it, more than once my human rug, willing to do anything for her thoughts and feelings, quickly turned to bitterness when rejected. While I personally used it as feedback to grow, many women have experienced things turning incredibly ugly.

[@x-man5056]

Often, women will not know the difference in Nice and Kind in the dating context. They are synonyms for each other, just like Chase and Pursue. Don't be the guy she views as supplicant. Often, if she says “You’re so nice", there will be..."the way you helped the waitress to clean the spill" or 'the way you treated that homeless man with respect" (good). VS "the way you treat me like a queen" (bad).

[@Alazar654]

Alexander grace, a pick-up artist, finally realized that women need to be held responsible for the way they treat men and that the game is whack.

[@marfav123]

It’s like when guys describe a girl as having a “great personality”. It’s the exact same thing

[@Jazzmaster1992]

I wouldn't read that much into it. You may not be attractive to some particular people but being nice or kind is not inhrently a bad thing.

[@DannyLanders-k7z]

Nice guys usually end up in the friend zone. Not a good place to be

[@CaseyFloridian]

Don't accept the friendzone 99% of the time as a guy you literally become a tool. I'm not saying the majority of women do this on purpose, but it's just how it goes. At best you become the reliable simp for favors she'll never return. Move on, don't waste your time

[@Asana25]

As a bottom 5%er in facial looks, I'd be lucky to get even _that_ privilege. I once posted my face onto the amiugly subreddit and got laughed at, which is hilarious considering they at times coddle unattractive people.

[@Gaming_Antics]

Nowadays, when women call me a nice guy, I get turn off and get kind of offended by them, because the way things are for a nice guy, those women basically called me a loser.

[@garypierce7380]

I would say thank you. There’s a lot more to a relationship than a one-liner.

[@matthewnanes]

Why be offended? You were paid a compliment. Say thanks and confidently ask them out on a date. If they don't agree to it, move on. It's not complicated.

[@MrLamontSanford]

its the equivalent to telling a woman "you're not fat you're just big-boned" or "well you have 'inner beauty' " Yes, its a back-handed compliment to a man...I get it all the time, it stings.

[@JAREDGRAF8181]

@@MrLamontSanford Im curious what exactly youre doing that makes them say youre a nice guy?

[@MrLamontSanford]

@@JAREDGRAF8181For starters... I go to mass on Sundays and holy days (like today). I have been told this a HUGE turn-off to most if not all women...including by a woman who is very religious and goes to mass every Sunday as well. She told me women, especially Latin women, loathe that and long for men or call them "whore" "slut" and "bitch" and who beat them and abuse them. I do none of that to anyone and never would or could. So I have that strike against me. I generally don't curse...specifically I don't toss around the F bomb every other sentence. I've been told by women that, too, is a huge turnoff...told I am extremely abnormal in that regard. Never get drunk or high and apparently that too makes me bizarre. I took care of a badly disabled family for decades, sacrificed a career, freedom to do this or that etc. women have danced around that one delicately "you're a really nice (nice!) brother...but.." and then find a circuitous way to tell me that makes me weak or a pushover whatever. Let's see...what else...oh I can't dance...don't like it...and don't car that I cannot dance (I can do other things like throw a ball etc. better than anyone)...been told by countless women...including my mother...that is seriously abnormal and, as my mother told me "you'll never win a girl or get married they will want nothing to do with you" because I don't shake it at wedding receptions (I then also took car of her...and dad...in their old age and disabilities). Let's see.....hmmm...no tattoos...I'm an athletic man...6'2", broad shoulders, strong legs...was a good runner but some injuries have halted that (I'm 55 now)...but i don't do muscle shirts like "gym guys" (I go to the gym but I'm not a "gym guy") those guys have their arms turned inward, sort of like apes...not sure if that is hypertrophy rom being obsessed with the bench press or more likely a "look" like "dude...I'm fuckin' ripped!" I don't have that look my arms are normal. I have a great sense of humor...high I.Q. and know lots of interesting things...I think they are turned off by that? Who knows...Let's see...let me think of mor things that make me puke "nice guy" to women...hmmm...

[@namelesswalaby]

BetterHelp ain't the one. They hire therapists that aren't certified and sell your data, including that collected in therapy sessions, to third parties.

[@Manhattan_Heretic]

Also expensive as well.

[@BruceJC75]

I’ve had a bad feeling about them from the beginning. They’re all about the trans agenda nonsense.

[@nuclearwhale]

BetterHelp is awful and that's why they advertise so much. There are better options that will actually accept your health insurance. Obviously in person is always better, but as far as remote therapy goes there are way better options.

[@SanVic]

And yet @CourtneyRyan keeps shilling for BetterHelp for the $$$$$. Remember that the next time she lectures on "integrity and morals."

[@BruceJC75]

@@SanVic Everyone shills for them, cause everyone has their price.

[@nicholasmosley8707]

While I certainly agree that most of these behaviors are not going to get you anywhere with anyone and are pretty annoying it is extremely evident that women are absolutely awful judges of character and 90 percent of it comes down to your attractiveness

[@TheyCallMeSledge]

Not exactly true. Either that or I've been pretty lucky. I'm neither a casanova or a ladies man but I've been in 3 long term relationships averaging about 3 years (Late teens - Young adult, Mid 20's & Early 30's) Not to say looks aren't a factor but most women favor how you make them feel over how you look to their eyes. The reason that women would tend to favor the "bad boy" is because he knows how to talk a good game which derives from confidence. You'll never know how far you'll get not just with women but society as a whole if you don't approach with confidence and charm (or wit if charm isn't your thing).

[@nicholasmosley8707]

Yea I’d agree somewhat, I’ve been in good relationships with women my whole life, currently in a long relationship and I’m not good looking. But in my observation I’ve found women are very bad at discerning confidence and competence from arrogance and just full on douche baggery and that error usually stems from the attractiveness of the counterpart. Not that men are any different in that regard but men don’t pretend they are good at caring or discerning in that realm the way women do

[@AIRJAC33]

They are. And they face no societal consequences for their laughably bad judge of character. And people will defend their behavior because it’s their “nature”.

[@nicholasmosley8707]

I don’t know why everyone assumes that if a man has an opinion that is unflattering to how women perceive themselves he hasn’t had luck or experience with women. I’ve been with women my whole life. I have experience observing them and have concluded that they cannot tell the difference between competence/confidence and douche baggery. And the reason they are often blinded is the same reason men are fooled, attractiveness. I just really have a problem with women constantly making themselves into deities, they don’t have special god like discernment, they are just plain people

[@nicholasmosley8707]

I don’t know why everyone assumes that if a man has an opinion that is unflattering to how women perceive themselves he hasn’t had luck or experience with women. I’ve been with women my whole life. I have experience observing them and have concluded that they cannot tell the difference between competence/confidence and douche baggery. And the reason they are often blinded is the same reason men are fooled, attractiveness. I just really have a problem with women constantly making themselves into deities, they don’t have special god like discernment, they are just plain people

[@Harikejn]

Important things: 1:02 First Thing ÷ Acting Entitled Because You're "Nice"; 2:08 Second Thing ÷ Agreeing With Everything That She Says; 5:31 Third Thing ÷ Overloading Her With Compliments; 7.24 Fourth Thing ÷ Over-Apologizing; 9:24 Fifth Thing ÷ Putting Yourself Beneath Her; 11:08 Sixth Thing ÷ Overtexting Or Overinvesting Too Soon; 12:19 Seventh Thing ÷ Claiming That You're Not Like Other Guys; and 14:47 to summarize all the told here. The additional things to all told here are these things: Eighth Thing ÷ Lack Of Boundaries Or Showing No Boundaries At All; Ninth Thing ÷ Talking Too Much About The Ex People; Tenth Thing ÷ Don't Knowing To Say Word NO When It's Needed (partly can be used at the second thing what you have told there Courtney); Eleventh Thing ÷ Joking Too Much Whole Time, And Not Being Serious (or better told not having balance when being serious, or when to be relaxed). What you have told here, it can also be used not just by men, but also by women as well, and also to be used in every life situations (for example talking with new people, doing a job interview, etc). I think that the thing such as "Nice Guy" I wouldn't call it that. I would rather call it a people pleaser or a person with no dignity at all. I also agree that it's not to be too nice person (either we talk about men, or women). Cause the too nice persons do attend to be that way so they can achieve their interest in some things and some life segments. But this is a very different topic that we can make a discussion about it. All in all, you have to be a Normal Person (either is a man or is a woman), cause being a Normal Person shows the following things: understanding, trust, support, respect, dignity and acceptance. These six thing are very important in whole life generally. The makeup goes well with the pattern of the sweater 👏👏👏👏👏👏. La perfection madam.

[@sirraymondluxuryyacht8131]

By entitled, she means men expect to be treated nice in return - how dare they!

[@Harikejn]

@@sirraymondluxuryyacht8131 Well, it was more that you read between the lines, what is the meaning of the video.

[@PRdude]

I've learned at a pretty early age that I'm not for everyone. I'd even had people tell me that I'm so nice and they can't believe I'm still single. Of course I knew deep down that being nice isn't enough, and you definitely don't want to take being nice too far.

[@OneFreeMan17]

There’s no such thing as taking being “nice too far” The world would be a better place if people a lot nicer to each other.

[@PRdude]

@@OneFreeMan17 Well there's being nice, and then there's being a doormat. The latter is definitely what you don't want to do.

[@OneFreeMan17]

@@PRdude Victim blaming.

[@CatGamer-wc2ij]

@@OneFreeMan17 Lol okay buddy. So let a homeless man move into your house, eat your food, and do illegal substances in your house around your kids. That is nice to give him a safe environment, food in his belly, but it took things way to far.

[@CatGamer-wc2ij]

Depends on when you do it. Never do it in your 20s, only when women start losing their shine. Then fake it. Get in and get out.

[@Front-Toward-Enemy]

I have to disagree with the first statement. The idea that a person is being “entitled” by stating “women prefer bad boys” is absurd. Especially since it’s a well documented fact at this point.

[@SanVic]

Thank you, voice of reason. Courtney is gaslighting for women... again.

[@bojanatube]

You just don't understand it.

[@qvxcswqr]

but it’s hardwired in women they can’t help it so there’s no point being upset about it

[@AIRJAC33]

Women don’t have to abide by the social contract anymore. Imagine thinking going to work and getting paid is entitled behavior. Or not breaking the law and expecting a safe neighborhood to live in is entitled.

[@lopa-u9f]

stereotypes and generalizations are a problem women are not a collective group this is called bigotry

[@GameStonk-d5r]

Being a doormat, you’re also shielding yourself from any potential red flags. When I disagreed with my ex on a political opinion, she completely shut down on me, refused to hear my viewpoint and gave me the silent treatment for a whole day. When I called my ex out on her being rude to a waiter, she dug deep into the past and randomly threw the fact that I had counselling when I was 15 in my face. Anyway, be assertive.. it’ll save you so much hassle in the long run.

[@User-fo8yx]

Women go level after level. Once you see, you can not unsee and learn to defuse (stay stoic) at the entry point. After that phase there is usually great opportunity for intimacy

[@Florida_gyrl]

Agreed! Goes for both men and women!

[@harryreese]

Same! I had a similar experience w/my ex almost 4 years ago when we were discussing our political opinions. All I said was, "I'm visiting the capital on the 6th, I'll be back in a few days" and I never heard from her again!

[@ichigokurosaki8661]

​@@harryreeseAre you referring to the white house storming ?

[@TomPlantagenet]

@@ichigokurosaki8661who stormed the White House?

[@dj_gzero]

I remember mentioning to my crush that her skin looks clearer. Her face LIT up as she mentioned how she’s been trying to focus on skincare more so you’re right in the specifics compliment part 😊

[@maxwillson]

I agree with all the points except the texting one. Women are on the extreme ends with texting. They either hate it or are obsessed with it. Men are genuinely confused with the texting rules. It's either not enough texting or too much texting. It's probably the worse form of communication in human history. I've given up on texting.

[@blakeharrison3972]

People pleaser are beyond frustrating, sometimes you don’t have a strong opinion, but never having one seems fake, it’s okay to say what you want

[@467076]

Never having an opinion one seems fake? Or do you mean agreeing with everybody? Not having an actual opinion on a subject that you know nothing about and stating that is much better than agreeing solely to agree or take a side. That's weak af.

[@williampowell2078]

I stopped the video at 2:12. Much of what you said is true, and I have to disagree on just as much of it. Kindness at the baseline is certainly good. That said, any person has a reasonable expectation of being well met. Dismissing this as transactional is an excuse for takers to justify selfishness and lack of self discipline. How is there to be balance and an avoidance of future resentment without reciprocity?

[@TheyCallMeSledge]

Whether or not you agree with it doesn't matter. Courtney spoke how many women operate within society, especially with the supposed "nice guy" trope because she's a woman herself expressing that point of view. You just gotta be a man and learn to disqualify and not entertain women who have an awkward view of you for having kindness. To me, those women are doing me a favor (even though I'm not exactly a nice guy but a straightforward one). If she doesn't seem like she's going to be into you, walk away. You'll find a woman who will take a liking to your personality, don't settle for less.

[@bojanatube]

What would a reciprocity be in your opinion? "I was nice to her, and I expect her to sleep with me" is not a reciprocity

[@williampowell2078]

@@bojanatube What do the words 'well met' mean to you? Bear in mind that I did not even remotely bring up any kind of transaction for sex. You did.

[@L4zyC47]

The video is to show how twisted women logics are. Being nice is the baseline of a moral person, but women will twist it into something being bad, therefore, they have zero respect for it. It is simply that. If you do care and love someone (being man or woman), you just simply be nice. But most women loves the dark fantasy and twisting that "nice" into boring, losing interest, instead of appreciate of how you treat her because you love her. And most "nice guy" will be confused and blame themselves for making mistakes when the woman walks away. It was just...they didnt know the true nature of the women.

[@kjhuang]

​@@bojanatubeHow about "I was nice to her; I expect her to be nice to me". Asking for too much?

[@exseraphim]

The unspoken thing about why good men (not the entitled "nice guys," but the ones that strike the balance that Courtney's talking about) is the "spark" that women expect to feel when meeting a partner. You're in the friendzone because she didn't feel the "spark" with you. However, the bigger problem with that is that the men who are the best at making a gal feel the "spark" are often malignant personalities - narcissists, sociopaths, etc. To that end, I think there's a case that female-centric media like romance novels, rom-coms, etc. have contributed to skewing female expectations of relationships the same way that porn has skewed male expectations of sex. They've begotten an expectation to feel a "spark" when they meet their "prince." Generations of women have been eating that up since watching Disney Princesses as toddlers, with nobody questioning possible negative effects, or stating that real life dating won't be like that.

[@jjberg83]

Bingo. It's spark over everything. And they expect the spark to last FOREVER. And that is not realistic in a lifelong partnership. It has to be about a deeper connection, which most people (not just the women) don't have the patience to develop.

[@1samc]

the last point reminds me of a quote from margaret thatcher on leadership, “being powerful is like being a lady, if you have to say you are, you’re not.”

[@michealcormier2555]

That was borrowed in Game of Thrones when Lord Tywen said, "If you have to say you are the king, then you're not" to Joffrey. Or something close to that.

[@pervezh]

Before you blame yourself as if there is something wrong with you, just make sure you are not just surrounded by assholes or messed up people

[@RealCourtneyRyan_OnT-elegrem]

I would prefer if we have private discu-ssion

[@MrLamontSanford]

Amen...its what I've learned...I'm a "nice guy" if there ever was one...finally realized its not being the problem its the insane modern tattooed women all around me who want a hole men because they want to be abused (it makes them feel real and they can gossip about it) I'm not changing me for T & A. Not worth it. I'm at peace now.

[@zakariyajama8004]

If a woman calls you a "nice guy" or a "good boy" or say how "good" of a guy you are just know that means she has 0 respect for you

[@RealCourtneyRyan_OnT-elegrem]

I would prefer if we have private discu-ssion

[@zakariyajama8004]

@RealCourtneyRyan_OnT-elegrem about this topic?

[@qvxcswqr]

Women want a guy who is CAPABLE of being a bad boy, doesn’t mean you have to be one 24/7 for her to be attracted to you. I feel like guys make it more complicated than it really is.

[@TheyCallMeSledge]

@@qvxcswqr It's honestly easier not to give a sh*t about what they prefer and just move how you move. I used to overthink the nice guy vs. bad boy concept during my younger years but I stopped caring, leading to be a bit more blunt and critically honest and that actually improved my chances with a wider range of women. Most women prefer a guy to just be masculine and straightforward and that doesn't necessarily mean being a bad boy, it means not kissing her ass and having a backbone, not being afraid to disagree with her, have some self respect, stuff like that.

[@Mistah_Boombastic_BiggieCheese]

@@TheyCallMeSledgedo you think they find being condescended to attractive?

[@TheDavidiscoolified]

I don’t think anybody should be entitled from anything from another person (save for maybe basic human decency), and “nice guys” (genuinely nice or transactionally nice) shouldn’t be entitled to a girl’s feelings. However, I do think it is more of a statement of truth to say that girls prefer men/boys who create more romantic or dramatic friction; are high in back-bone/self-respect and pride; and are either good risk-takers or incredibly reckless - than to men/boys who are overall agreeable, genuinely loving, kind, polite, giving, selfless, pursuant, etc. Again, those traits aren’t to be confused with transactional/fake “niceness”. But it’s a sad story when so many girls prefer to choose the guy who can give some quasi-experience of being in a romance novel who’ll more than likely screw her over in the end than the guy (someone who is a TRUE friend) who has the genuine qualifiers of a good, sustainable, long-lasting marriage, simply for the fact that those traits are too “boring”, “predictable”, and not like a romance novel. In other words, if a relationship is like a house, the foundations of a house can be built on that “romantic flame”. But wanna know what happens with flames? They either burn out or burn the whole house down. The relationship’s spark dies or it becomes utter ash and ruin. But if the foundations of a house are built on stone - the strength, dependability, and solid foundation of a true friendship - then a house can stand. And then, once the house is built, there is room to create a safe fireplace, where that romantic spark never has to die, can always be refueled, and will sustain warmth for the two. But what’s sad is that the girl will almost always choose the flame that dies out than the stone that lasts forever. And though there is no entitlement for the girl to choose otherwise, I think that is a legitimate reason to grieve - and I think men have the right to complain that the genuinely good guy (“the stone” - who has no entitlement) still loses to “the bad boy” (“the flame”).

[@RealCourtneyRyan_OnT-elegrem]

Thanks for being here and for the kind comment! I would prefer if we have private discu-ssion

[@TomPlantagenet]

There was a reason for most of history that fathers picked their daughters husbands

[@EdisZloma]

I agree, I got a recommendation from your video hidden techniques for manifesting women zorlest I had a bit of knowledge, now I have a good piece.

[@Denis1988Y]

i also got this recomendation from my best girl friend

[@kskslslslsoooao]

No, no, no, the ultimate goal is not 'being confident'. Confidence is the most overrated feature in people. A lot of confident people are confident for all the wrong reasons. Lack of knowledge and/or self-knowledge is a big one. The ultimate goal is being a good person.

[@SanVic]

Good post. In the US, confidence = arrogance. That's exactly how the world views Americans.

[@TheyCallMeSledge]

You are aware that being a good person is also a part of confidence as well because it shows consistency of character. Let's not be disingenuous and deem confidence to be a bad trait. Confidence and knowledge come hand in hand. There is no such thing as confidence without knowledge because that's known as vanity and arrogance. Learn the difference.

[@kskslslslsoooao]

@@TheyCallMeSledge No. Confidence and being a good person are totally separated things. You can be a good person without being self-confident, 100%. And vice versa. Take lectures (and I know it is a silly example, but at least it's concrete). You can be a good person (and do the right thing) by offering a high quality lecture, that consists of accurate, non-biased, let's call it wholesome, information, and present all that in an accessible way. At the same time you can visibly suffer from stage fright, and be highly self-conscious and anxious about how you will be perceived by an audience. As for knowledge, you could even argue that in this particular example the speaker suffers from an abundance of knowledge. Knowledge of his inappropriate body language, knowing how whimsical and easily bored people in the audience can be, etc.

[@TheyCallMeSledge]

@@kskslslslsoooao So are you saying that a good person can't be confident? I still refuse to disrespect the notion of having confidence as a bad trait.

[@Littletime839]

You are unquestionably right but simultaneously wrong because women are attracted to confidence regardless of whether its misguided

[@sanjeevgig8918]

WOMEN: You should BUY. US. DINNER. and be nice to us BUT do not expect anything from us. . SAME WOMEN: That guy was "being nice" ... he must want something from me. LOLZ

[@Riwillion]

So... Just wave and smile, boys :)

[@jessehowell1972]

I wish I would have heard the things in this video during my Teenage and 20's ages. I mistaked being way too nice as being the perfect gentleman. Boy, was I wrong, and friend zoned alot.

[@MrLamontSanford]

Don't change "you" for them....the hell with them...let them have their "bad boys" in the end they are all addmittedly miserable.

[@balancer182]

I don't think questioning why women go for bad boys when they could go for someone nice is entitlement. It is genuine curiosity, women constantly complain about guys who treat them badly, but why are you with them then? It doesn't make any sense. If you don't like men who treat you badly, then go for men for treat you nice.

[@L4zyC47]

The true nature of women is to seek for powerful men who can protect them. So they prefer the men who can carry out bad acts (as it signals power) Which is why most young women into bad boys, but later on, they wanted to settle down with "nice guys." It just hard to figure that out as you grow up for most. So suggestion is to be fake bad boys. It is not the "nice guy" being the problem, it is the "dark fantasy" of women that twisted the perception of being nice out of love or being nice due to other motives.

[@thomasparg1981]

I made the "I don't want to be like your ex" mistake. After I said it, she told me, "I don't care about that, I want you to be you." We are no longer together, but I always remember that.

[@AngelofJustice412]

Not only does that tip her off to the fact that you’re a nice guy, which we all know women don’t like, it also implies that you’re stupid and don’t know any better because when they disparage their exes they’re almost always just lying to make themselves look good.

[@thomasparg1981]

@RealCourtneyRyan-OnTe-legrem you got to be kidding me. I see enough of you people over in crypto.

[@Jimfrenchde]

I would get nervous if my date complained about her ex because I have my faults too.

[@matthewnanes]

This is probably one of the best comments I've seen. She's 100% correct. Being confidently yourself with no expectation, genuinely being interested in the other person, and acknowledging confidently that you're definitely not for everyone will get dudes much farther than they think.

[@DarenHoekstra]

I created a riddle which says it all in a few words. Question: "What do women want?" Answer: Who cares!" While it sounds rude, the reality is that women want a man who doesn't care what they want. She wants a man who does what he wants as long as what he wants aligns somewhat with what she wants.

[@anonemaus159]

Why does everybody claim "stage 5 clinger?" What are the other stages? Are they less intimidated by a stage 3, If you don't cling with at least a stage 1, is she insulted? We kneed to know!!!

[@MrAumbra]

Great tips. One of my sons apologizes too much for simple things and Icorrect him all the time. I’m going to send this to him. Thank you.

[@BALHAM69]

Lowkey Courtney us guys all want is a woman who won’t embarrass us in front of our family.😮 Happy Sunday.😅

[@CourtneyRyan]

Lol it sounds like you might have a good story to tell 😂 happy Sunday!

[@frosinon]

Yep this came up clutch ! Thank u

[@jkaugust3586]

Being nice is like giving a gift. A true gift is never transactional -- expecting something back -- that's manipulative. A true gift is from the heart and never expects anything as payment, in return

[@RealCourtneyRyan_OnT-elegrem]

I would prefer if we have private discu-ssion

[@soichirohonda267]

👍

[@CoachSteveJandS]

Dr Robert Glover wrote a book years ago called "no More Mr Nice Guy "which is a very deep dive on this topic

[@ironman1518.]

MY experience as a nice guy, has been most ladies I liked dropped me liked a POS and they went with losers that abused them.

[@Emilyportmon]

Why would you want a woman who likes that

[@AIRJAC33]

@@Emilyportmonthey all do. He just has to adapt to it.

[@Emilyportmon]

@ oh yeah because you met every woman you don’t see me saying All men this and that that’s stupid

[@MrLamontSanford]

You are not alone. Its rampant. Women are insane and want insane men/ "bad boys" etc. They WANT to be abused...it makes them feel 'real' or something...and I have been told that ...by women. They LOVE abuse!!

[@Asana25]

As if women would be willing to choose a sub5 "Bad boy" or a "nice guy" chad

[@xfxrxmxt1981]

After listening to these tips,….. I concluded…. It’s not worth it. I’ll try and continue to enjoy my life alone.

[@CGMedia2023]

Being a decent person isn't the same as being a "nice guy". We need to normalize the concept of decent people.

[@stu713]

These are all spot on. I was a borderline “nice guy” back in the day but as I aged I stopped caring and just went with the flow. Especially the first point. Being nice should just be basic human decency. Being nice should not be transactional. The second point goes both ways. I dated a really nice girl once (no pun intended) but she literally agreed with everything f I said. I’d even contradict myself and still got the same thing. If anything it was boring, like talking to a mirror and there was no challenge. Compliments are also a big thing. The current woman I’m seeing is gorgeous, but most of my compliments are about her character beyond the looks. She even told me how much she appreciates that because she knows she’s “hot” and complimenting her looks are nothing new, but also boring and tiresome to her. I never put myself beneath her and even jokingly (at the right moment) act cocky, but like a joking cocky and she knows that. But really you’re two different people with different strengths so highlight your strengths without coming off arrogant. As for texting, it’s ping pong, I’ll text she responds, I’ll reply. But if I’m in the middle of something, I’ll text her later when I’m free. I don’t play games, but I also don’t reply immediately if the text doesn’t require and immediate reply or I’m busy. Super simple stuff

[@krumplethemal8831]

Did she just blame the nice guy? @ 0:18 lol hilarious..

[@wulliecochrane]

No, she didn't.

[@joncokejones9318]

No she’s being honest. Being a good guy and being the “Nice Guy” Stereotype are two different things

[@RedRoyce]

Very good Courtney. I'm an older guy and have younger men ask me questions and this was spot on. It's more about when, what and how you deliver something. Worst thing to do is try to say something when you don't feel it. She will pick up on this before you get done saying whatever it is your trying saying.

[@michaelaustin310]

I think you are over generalizing point 1. Yes, there are guys that are entitled. Many guys, including myself, were told that we were supposed to act like nice guys with women. That was what was proper and respectful. Women were looking for those traits. I was someone who said "why is she only going out with a bad guy" more out of bewilderment than entitlement. As far as when Courtney ties in back with this point later. I think this is a prime example of how most men and women think differently. Many times when a guy says he would be better or wouldn't do x to her he is trying to be logical, straightforward. He is seeing a problem and is trying to fix it.

[@jamesgallagher2434]

Being nice is not the same thing ad being a good person. Being nice is fake, and women are creeped out by fake.

[@michaelaustin310]

If you automatically assume that a guy being nice is fake, you're creating a no-win situation for everyone. A good person would be nice. Says more about you than the person if that is all you are going on.

[@jeff503pdx]

Great video. I'm a reformed nice guy. No, not the silly toxic KZbin "alpha" male but a good guy with strong boundaries.

[@DannyLanders-k7z]

BINGO

[@williamgoldenvi8150]

I don’t have the attitude that I deserve something just because I’m nice. That’s not how the world works. But it is definitely frustrating as a man to hear from girls that they’ve never been treated so kindly in a relationship just to leave you eventually and continue to date assholes. I think there are some girls out there for sure that don’t know how to deal with being treated with respect and kindness.

[@SanVic]

Exactly. @CourtneyRyan is simply gaslighting for women.'s bad choices.. again.

[@TheyCallMeSledge]

I don't get pressed at that, if anything she's doing me a favor because she has shown she's not ready to be in a mature, stable relationship. I refuse to have any more of my time wasted on an insecure woman.

[@williamgoldenvi8150]

@@TheyCallMeSledge I feel you. Just wish we didn’t have to learn the hard way a few times. But that’s all part of growing as a man I guess and learning about what you need in a partner. Now I know better.

[@qvxcswqr]

It’s hardwired in women for them to be attracted to that and they can’t help it so there is no point being upset about it.

[@MrLamontSanford]

@@SanVic good way to put it...yep its us good men who need to change because women are insane and want Assholes for lovers.

[@robertlequang3409]

“I’m sorry for breathing” lol! 😂 I love it. Great video!

[@RealCourtneyRyan_OnT-elegrem]

I would prefer if we have private discu-ssion.

[@dontokoi1]

Niceness isn't an entitled transaction, but women will bend over backwards and break all of their rules to seek the approval of a push-pull badboy who isn't nice, kind, polite, or intelligent at all.

[@jaymose1146]

I've found that when I don't try to impress or pursue a woman, it is easier to find out who's got attraction towards me. All of the tips and topics covered in this video can be linked towards how a person grew up and the habits or tendencies develop over daily living experience. Fear of the unknown is unpredictable but living with that fear will spread out from your mindset to the interactions on any social level. Thanks for posting.

[@1bosstv]

So just talk to women that talk to you first? Works if you're attractive.

[@jaymose1146]

@1bosstv being attractive is a subjective take on people. Some prefer certain aspects of a person's features and others don't like those same features. People only tell themselves they aren't attractive and believe it. Some don't understand that social interactions don't need a motive or a purpose, that conversing can be open ended without intent.

[@willverschneider1102]

Her: "You're such a nice guy, you're like a brother to me!" Him: "Don't say that! I'm actually a very selfish guy! I forget your birthday, I leave the toilet seat up, I flirt with your girl friends. Oh, and I think you really do look fat in that dress!" Her: "Stop right there. You had me at toilet seat! 😍"

[@SylvesterAshcroft88]

The first point hit pretty close to home, i used to think like this, and i also used to know women who acted like this, but they'd turn on a dime as soon as they didn't get their way, so i tried to gain some self confidence, and assert more control over my own life, before trying to be as someone else's.

[@paulsmith5611]

In modern society, at least living in a big city in the US, it doesn't pay to "be nice" to strangers. I might give a nod and "hello" to someone as I'm walking past them but other than that I don't care about people that I have nothing in common with and will never know personally. I don't hate them and I'm not rude but I'm indifferent. So if I do go out of my way to be nice to a woman that I don't know or just know a little bit it is because I'm interested. I do want something in return. Most people do. If you do too many kind/nice things and get nothing in return you will eventually quit doing them. Same thing with people at work. Do you help your coworkers because you personally care about them? Or do you do it so the job gets done as a group which will make your job easier? Or do you help them knowing you might need help in the future and you want them to return the favor or so your boss will notice and you will get a promotion/raise/recognition? The answer is obvious for most everyone.

[@michaeljeffery7466]

Average Northerner.

[@soichirohonda267]

Yes, typicall alienated capitalist western individual.

[@mikem3593]

Great messages, especially the end of the video about how growth takes time and is a process. Great video Courtney!

[@gregc247]

I kinda stopped watching her channel, listening to women speak at all on these topics anymore is a waste of time, dating period is a gigantic waste of time

[@donaldleider7382]

Just be true to yourself. If she likes you fine, if not the hell with her. My father told me there are always better fish in the sea.

[@matthewsaltzman5573]

Every one of these vids always leads to the same thought for me now. Look at how much effort a guy has to put in, how much he is forced to play games, to most likely end up with a female who will only ever be 10% of the woman her grandmother was. Is there good women out there? Sure there is. But there are so few, that unless you're making 300-500k per year, you have no chance. Unless you get lucky and nab one when you're both young. Any guy over 40 you better be swimming in cash.

[@RealCourtneyRyan_OnT-elegrem]

I would prefer if we have private discu-ssion

[@Asana25]

*"But there are so few, that unless you're making 300-500k per year, you have no chance."* Not needed if ur a 7 or above in looks (Chad). Becomes irrelevant if you're facially sub5 (I have a neighbour who's a living example of this)

[@sburns2421]

There is a great book called "No More Mr. Nice Guy". Basically the "nice guy" is subconsciously manipulative trading his kindness for what he wants from a woman (love, s*x, relationship etc). If you are honest with yourself and have the courage to change this small book can be very helpful.

[@sirraymondluxuryyacht8131]

Typical propoganda to villify guys for being nice. Women use this as a tactic to justify chasing losers.

[@krmakole8456]

8th thing -"America is a Nation that can be defined in a single word...Iwuzindfutmhmafut"

[@derekkwok1869]

Thank goodness I've developed myself enough to no longer be guilty of any of these. I'll never forget what one of my friends said during his wedding. He and his wife were saying a few words to each other before saying "I do" and my friend legit started tearing up and said "I don't deserve you. Before I met you, I had no direction in life, and now you're my purpose"... like no lie...I can only wonder what his now-wife was thinking in that moment... but they're still happily married...so yea haha

[@dongordo63]

Courtney.....I've watched many of your videos, and I have to say this one seems overly formulaic. The 'don't say this, say that'....and 'don't do this, do that' approach is just laying down more 'rules', and it just seems overwhelming to deal with and exhausting to think about. I'm not saying that nothing you say makes sense. The types of guys who would watch a video like this in hopes of improving his chances with women will be even more confused by trying to implement your suggestions. People are more complex than this. Men and women like or dislike each other for myriads of reasons, and just saying the right thing is not going to make someone like you. You seem to be saying....'if you play the game correctly, then you will win', when that's not really true. I'm an older guy with much experience with lots of types of women, and you are a younger woman. We all don't fit into a box. I did better with women that I really didn't care one way or the other. Those I worked hard to attract barely noticed. I became completely disallusioned by trying to 'play the game' and it got me nowhere. Now I just don't care anymore. My advice: make something of yourself, be yourself, the person you really are, and I think more will like you for your genuineness. Stop tap dancing around because you think this what you're 'supposed to be'.

[@RealCourtneyRyan_OnT-elegrem]

I would prefer if we have private discu-ssion

[@theredlens]

I’m going to try the compliment thing on you “I’m really impressed with your overly dark shade of hair dye ” “It really brings out your contacts”

[@larsf.4756]

Another thing that I've seen a lot with nice guys is that they continue to pursue a woman, long after they were rejected, misinterpreting politeness as interest, instead of moving on.

[@Florida_gyrl]

YES!

[@RealCourtneyRyan_OnT-elegrem]

Thanks for being here and for the kind comment! I would prefer if we have private discu-ssion

[@TheyCallMeSledge]

That's the sad truth that majority of men today know nothing about. Women are masters of telling a man "No" without ever actually saying it. It's also usually a lesson learned the hard way. People can say what they want about the Red Pill but this is a very elemental lesson learned in that space and it's very helpful.

[@stefanofarella9877]

As an Italian, that now live in the US. I like americans people really 😊 But yeah especially in the beginning i had to much "sorry" that sometimes make me think why?! 😂 Instead of using sorry it could be better use a Thanks Esemple: - Thank you, for had the patience to wait - I'll try to do it better next time, i appreciate that you bringing this to my attention.

[@Arturo_Zepe]

Those guys who really think that one day “bad” women are gonna disappear… they gonna wait 100 years, we’ll see what happen.

[@FitzkeithFitzhugh]

That's naive if guys are waiting for that to happen. Good and bad is forever.

[@garysandberg3259]

Stupid thing is why not just approach talking/interacting with another human being!!!!

[@carza355]

The reality is in this world some people will be able to date with success and quite a lot will not be able to, I have spent 20 years being the person I am and have got nowhere. I could probably date if I simply settled and tried to be with people I have no attraction to and no interest in. In my mind that is not dating at all. Oddly enough I have never come across people who are superficially attractive have zero dating success but I have come across good people who know nothing but rejection.

[@1bosstv]

Just become a multimillionaire. Then buy the good looks and fame and clout.

[@Courtney-Alice-Gargani]

A generally nice person never expect anything in return

[@MotorheadForever7]

And what does that do for you?

[@jeremyfuller7730]

Women have been conditioned to label any genuinely nice person has an ulterior motive of expecting sex. There's no such thing as being a genuinely nice person when it comes to dating in women's minds

[@bojanatube]

Amen.

[@rdthaprariedawg]

Here’s where I throw the flag - people who are “generally nice” or polite DO expect something in return. What? That people return that same treatment to them. You know - the ol’ “treat others the way you want to be treated” thing. Somewhere along the way, we have decided that’s fine - except for the lone area of men interacting with women. That adage that mostly everyone in the world has heard makes sense to everyone in theory except for today’s woman. Okay… “Women don’t owe you to be nice (or anything)…” Fine. But if you lean on that, you better not lean on “Nice is the baseline/bare minimum” at the same time because no one owes anyone anything.

[@bojanatube]

​@@rdthaprariedawg nice IS a bare minimum for any kind of relationship. At the same time, nobody owes you their time, body, etc. if you are nice, e.g. people can choose not to have a relationship with you. Nice is still a bare minimum though, and if you really just are being nice you deserve to be rejected in a respectful way. That is being nice. Another story is if you are trying to push your niceness onto others (in which case you actually aren't nice)

[@MarkusSsZ]

I do none of these 7 things and I'm apparently still considered too nice :D

[@rawthe]

Problem with all this is, once a man masters all these tips, his compatible dating pool shrinks. He starts hearing things like "You're too perfect..." which is ironic because women aren't comfortable knowing they're the ones needing to work on themselves. Those who overcome that are never single for long.

[@RealCourtneyRyan_OnT-elegrem]

Thanks for being here and for the kind comment! I would prefer if we have private discu-ssion

[@geoffl]

all these are symptoms of a lack of options. You automatically shed these behaviors when you have interest from a few women. So go get that.

[@AngelValdovinos]

🤡

[@kenrickbautista6141]

I'm a genuinely nice person who's heart is always in the right place and the one thing I always try to avoid is being an insecure, desperate and holier-than-thou individual. I also never want to come across as fake, since I was never disingenuous.

[@Imhotep397]

One thing I’ve done in one relationship was that tried to understand more about her likes in music, which were different than mine, but I liked that I was learning new things. Having said that I almost feel like being open to agreeing while learning new things is a cardinal sin, because it makes you too much of a nice guy. Alternatively, some women feel like they can change their mind, change their life, move on and not say anything until you discover “all this change” happened months ago unbeknownst to you and now there’s no going back to what seemed solid yesterday.

[@hyugahyuga3761]

Magnet for Women’ by CrypticLore isn’t just about attraction-it’s about building genuine connections. This book helped me understand things I never thought about before

[@samweirich5973]

It's not about what you say, or how you say it, or your body language, or any of that... It just comes down to looks. A goodlooking guy can say whatever he wants and women will sill fawn over him.

[@RealCourtneyRyan_OnT-elegrem]

I would prefer if we have private discu-ssion.

[@austinmcnair612]

I used to be all of those things but have grown so much over time. I've been on more dates this year than my whole life just because I change my mindset, my approach, and became more self-reflective in a healthy way. Dating has brought more clarity on what I still need to improve upon: 1) Knowing myself, what I like, my hobbies, my life goals, and evidence of making progress. 2) Being more social with other people in general (not just for a date, but normal conversation). 3) My wardrobe (thanks a million times Courtney! 😁) 4) Spending less time online and more time enjoying things in real life. 5) Investing in friendship with others (isolation or "I don't have any friends" can be a red flag to some women).

[@RealCourtneyRyan_OnT-elegrem]

I would prefer if we have private discu-ssion

[@MrLamontSanford]

So you were not true to yourself and changed "you" and find women now like the false version of "you" great

[@lawrence31415]

Hey Courtney, I remember you once said to date with the purpose of getting to know someone. That piece of advice has been extremely helpful during the last three dates I've had with the woman I've been talking to in the past month. I can honestly say that approach made dating more enjoyable, and it also gave me more insight in what I value in a romantic relationship. I don't think I will be pursuing anything serious with this woman, and I'm definitely not going to play any games because that's just cruel. But, I do believe I did make a new friend along my dating journey, and I'm ready to try again!

[@offtherealm5438]

I think that "Humble Bragging" is bad too. Along with announcing your weaknesses and short comings constantly....i learned that in college "Oral Communication" class.

[@Ichigamaru]

It's very sad that a video like this is needed. It's about people who don't have no idea how to be themselves without being afraid. Thanks for making a good thing.

[@jetuber]

You say that, but if I were still daying, trying to keep all of these things in mind would make me even MORE afraid. It's as if dating is like walking in a minefield, and at any moment, one can put a foot wrong and . . . kaput. How could one enjoy a date if one were policing oneself all evening?

[@Ichigamaru]

@jetuber After some time, things like this becomes intuitive. You begin to observe positive reactions from others and i guess your mind just learns what works and what not. The hard part is taking out the bullshit that your upbringing planted in your head.

[@TheyCallMeSledge]

@@jetuber Your problem is you care too damn much. Why you gotta police yourself for? You are who you are and you gotta stand ten toes down on that. If she has a problem with that, she's free to leave. Don't be scared of losing out on a date, because if she takes an issue with anything you do, it was already a wrap from the get go.

[@SThamavong2177]

excellent video esp the later points. Great advice Courtney. Wish I would have known these things when I was younger

[@sharkoh]

No way, one of the top first viewers here!! 😮 thanks Court for your advice though the years. I APPRECIATE your work

[@CourtneyRyan]

It’s my pleasure! Thank you so much for being here 🥹

[@burntoburn42]

It's true, I can remember all 3 of the compliments I've received in my life and boy were they potent!

[@kevinbradshaw6127]

Give her a nice genuine compliment when your in her company, then stay away from her, no social media contact , nothing , then she'll eventually seek you out one way or the other if she likes you, then start from there

[@guilhermedamiao13]

Unfortunately, it's a very good and realistic strategy 😂

[@NexWalkthrough]

This isn't a movie man.. As a man, we're probably going to have to do a lot more than that to get the woman we want. That's just how it is. Ask how many men in your life if they've ever used your tactic and see what the results are

[@kevinbradshaw6127]

@guilhermedamiao13 it works buddy !

[@joshliam1967]

All of these points are well said and a few are things I'm working on as a recovering "nice guy", thank you Courtney.

[@Herozonex200]

Over texting is something I agreed with.

[@tommiller7177]

Yes

[@reeseseater12]

Pretty much just treat women like people rather than sex objects and have self respect, don’t put up with boundary crossing or disrespect, is what guys have to do. Even though some may think putting a woman above their own needs show dedication it doesn’t, women don’t respect simps and they won’t love someone they don’t respect

[@chengliu872]

I feel like there is a fine line between being entitled and expecting gratitude.

[@RealCourtneyRyan_OnT-elegrem]

I would prefer if we have private discu-ssion

[@jamesgallagher2434]

It’s crazy how many men weren’t taught properly from a young age that nice is not the same as being a good person, and it’s fake.

[@Dman425]

It would be nice if doing something for her(or anyone) was reciprocated every once in awhile. That is all we want. It’s not meant to be manipulative and/or transactional

[@DEFCOR1]

I used to belong to the over-apologizing sort, and I attracted very few women. Once I started working out, eating healthy, and gained a ton of confidence from being more disciplined in general, I started receiving an unprecedented amount of attention from girls to the point where I would miss a lot of hints since I was so used to being ignored by girls. I’m only now just starting to recognize these hints thanks to your channel and also hindsight.

[@johnnyroese]

I love how good Courtney is at breaking things down in a constructive and positive way.

[@carnage3208]

I've been guilty of many of these in the past, and still been to this day on a couple, its tough ironing out bad habits. I notice it happens a lot more at work too as I'll try not to rock the boat a lot at work. Recovering people pleaser, nice guy, etc. Maybe its just the way you're raised, having a family thats tough to please. 27 now, just graduated with a BA

[@offjofce]

And remember guys, if you're insecure, not confident, have needs that you want to fulfill aka you're needy, here's a list of the 1538 more things you need to do and cross off a checklist to get a date with another human being, good luck with that 😂😂😂

[@StargateMax]

I already realized that the main reason for always being friendzoned is because I've always been too nice and caring. So it comes from low self-esteem? I also understand the difference between being genuinely nice and being "nice" insecure/needy/spineless (unattractive).

[@ShadowNash108]

Courtney, you should create a training program about overcoming nice guy syndrome, and this training must come first before learning how to attract the right woman because a lot of men out there are nice guys.

[@CourtneyRyan]

I will definitely do more videos about it!

[@christophergraves6725]

You should never give up being a gentleman. Here is advice from management consultant Adam Grant: There are three types of people 1. Exploiters 2. Matchers 3. Unconditionally kind people. By the way this analysis only holds for those who have repeated contact with the same people over time. Continuing on with the analysis by Professor Grant. In the short run, Exploiters can get ahead. But then the problem comes up for them once people realize who they are, other people react to them. Other Exploiters resent them because they are competition for themselves as well as they are very likely to retaliate against anyone who screws them. Matchers, and I might add I am one myself, match whatever another person not only does to them but what they see the other person is doing to others. So, if someone screws them or they see that someone might screw them, they retaliate and seek to eliminate these aggressors by most any means necessary. Then we have the unconditional nice guy whom other people like and perhaps hold some begrudging respect for. No one retaliates against them. So, for the Exploiter who has been detected, we have the vast majority of people working to destroy them and they succeed over time in most cases. I see myself as a gentleman and so a nice guy, but I am also very unforgiving and retaliatory and I would recommend everyone else move in the direction of the matcher who is the backbone of a civilized society. Consider the work of political scientist Robert Axelrod on this very point in his book *The Evolution of Cooperation* where he documents matching others' behavior in repeated interactions leads to greater spontaneous social cooperation and greater respect for all involved. This middle ground is the best approach and does not require anyone to wrong another person unless one believes justly inflicting pain on an aggressor is unjust, which I do not.

[@SanVic]

@@CourtneyRyan Interesting how 53% of white women voted for a serial adulterer, adjudicated rapist and 34-time felon Donald Trump for president. Not the nice guy, or in this case, the nice woman, Kamala Harris. How's that working for you?

[@DJAnees-rn3ee]

You are incredibly articulate. Thumbs up 👍

[@paulgiarmo3628]

How is it being "entitled" to say that you're a nice guy? Or that you're "bitter" and "self-pitying " for saying that? Given women's poor track record in choosing "good guys", it should be seen as an advantage over the disrespectful, narcissistic guys that most women fall for. This is the worst video that she has made in over three years. The only sense of entitlement I see here is coming from these solipsistic women who have it so much easier than men in the dating market. Men have to do eight million things correctly, and in the right order, and women just have to show up. So tired of the lack of compassion from women like her.

[@ryanwright7836]

@@paulgiarmo3628 10000%

[@paulgiarmo3628]

@RealCourtneyRyan-OnTe-legrem I'm here to discuss.

[@bojanatube]

Women do not have it easier. Women just don't need men that much, and are thus more choosey.

[@croliverh]

Every time it's the man who has to change, I can't even be a good person, anything I do a woman will think I'm interested in something. It makes me feel so tired, there is always something that takes away the value of what I genuinely do. I'd rather live my solitude than be a puppet.

[@subhrajitgupta5535]

The only suggestion to all men: These videos are useless Stop listening to women. You are appraising their market positions. Create your own stuff.

[@TheSaiyanKing]

That's some incel thinking buddy.

[@subhrajitgupta5535]

@TheSaiyanKing To dance on the tunes of what others propagate is cowardice not bravery. I never said to remain an incel. But to advance what they demand only goes one way to cater to endless demands of which men are held responsible to. As amen, we first need to live well and focus on self. If you want to meet women, talk to them regardless of any pre-conception. There is no a way to behave with women, they are just humans, and to listen to them as what they want is advancing their assets, not yours and ultimately it's you who should be blamed for

[@marlonselesi]

Just do you. If she likes what she sees she'll roll with it, if not, keep it moving. End of story.

[@sheep3po]

Thank you it hit home 😢 I learn so much from this