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I know it's an overused song but it reminds me of the good times, WCG 2019, when my team was able to win against the former world champion BD and able to compete with the best in the world. Last year was my first time not attending CFS since 2015, and I realized I took the opportunity to represent Europe at the most prestigious CF tournament for granted. I had to blame myself for not qualifying for CFS, even though I stepped up individually in the qualifiers, because I spent 7 months in Dubai instead of being focused at home in Germany. On top of that, playing the qualifier without phaze was a mistake as well. Mentally, I was in a bad state for a long time even though I was able to live in Dubai and nice places in Asia and making good money with social media as well. Obviously, I'm still super grateful that I am able to play CF for a living and that I got the opportunity to become a streamer for VSPN, the biggest Esports organizier in Asia.
In the end, playing CF tournaments is really my biggest passion in life so far and it was very hard to accept not being able to compete for several months. Although my manager told me to stay in Thailand so I am able to stream CF China and play with Chinese professional players, I decided to go home to play CFEL Season 1 because I missed competing so much. I knew financially it would be a bad idea anyway because I can't stream CF China but I was convinced it's necessary, so I might play CFS 2022. Actually, the main reason why I learned Chinese is so I am able to join a Chinese team one day. In 2020, I was about to sign a contract with a Chinese team but then covid 19 happened. I was always amazed by Chinese and Brazilian teams because it seems like they are like families and so passionated as well. Most likely Chinese borders won't open the next few months which means I might play CFS qualifiers for an European team again.
I know I was not really active on YT last year but I still want to say thank you to all my loyal supporters and I felt like sharing all these information because you deserve to know what's going on. I know a lot of people did not take me serious when I have started studying Mandarin to grow my Chinese social media and to join a Chinese team. The same happened when I grew my facebook account as well. Let people talk and just do your thing. My plan is definitely to play the next few years CF professionally and I will work as hard as possible to be back at CFS again.
Thanks for reading.
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