The Dragon Paradox

[@lakoneko]

I really identified with the childhood feelings of "if I could just explain my niche nerdy interests clearly enough, maybe they won't think I'm weird" which then backfires and makes you regret talking about anything you're interested in. I remember seeing these shows, reading these books, and having these feelings. It's really nice to see so many others have the same experience. I'm glad we all found like minds in the end.

[@thekawaiiginger7840]

I remember all of these things so well and I’m so glad I kept with my dragon interests. How To Train Your Dragon’s movies are still my favorite movies to this day too.

[@bobsonny]

Yeah dawg, you're describing autism. Special interests are our our business!

[@immanuelm.5156]

Me too man it’s amazing how he nailed it right on the head!!!

[@specialnewb9821]

I never quite understood that. Why would you want to talk about something to someone who obviously isn't interested in the topic? It's kind of rude to try to force an interest on people whether thats sports or anime. And for the record I was plump, nerdy and the only brown guy around. So I definitely had those interests.

[@lakoneko]

@@specialnewb9821 well usually the conversation starts because someone asks "what are you doing?" Or "what's that?" And then you start to explain. And then when they look confused you think "huh, maybe I didn't explain it well enough" so you info dump a bit trying to explain better, not realizing they don't care, because it's something that means a lot to you and they did ask initially so they must have been interested at first but maybe it's my fault I didn't explain well enough. And then they walk away and you contemplate that interaction for a very long time trying to figure out what you did wrong. It's not trying to force anything as much as missing the "obviously not interested" cues 😅 and as you get more experienced, you notice it better, but as a kid you just want to share what you like and maybe they'll think it's cool too.

[@glacioaszalean9575]

"Perhaps it's only natural for those who struggle or have struggled with human interaction to seek knowledge of the monstrous" is a line that goes very hard and I guess hits a bit close home. Very insightful essay, thank you.

[@MoltenSamurai]

Yeah, really an unforgettable line for me, it seems a lot of folks feel the same way…

[@hopethisworks33]

It's rude, is what it is! I just wanted a video on dragons. I didn't want newfound self-awareness. Take it back!

[@intellectually_lazy]

@@hopethisworks33 well, at least he didn't "ruin" your childhood. there seems to be a lot of that going around

[@glacioaszalean9575]

Feel with all of you. Was one of those kids who knew most of the Pokedex by heart, and to this day have near encyclopedic knowledge of special interests. Cheers to you all, autistic or not

[@user-kv5lq9xm8c]

Damn he’s calling us out

[@XDWASDX]

“Perhaps it’s only natural for those who struggle or have struggled with human interaction to seek knowledge of the monstrous” is a very profound note to have made.

[@samuelswihart4285]

This is probably why I'm obsessed with UFOs and Cryptids too

[@pingpong5877]

I never liked people. That's why I'm a monster girl enjoyer.

[@dashadow1817]

​@@pingpong5877bro what

[@thenoobgamer95]

@@pingpong5877 Based

[@lema0925]

I assume that is why a lot of my friends are furries... frankly, it is depressing they have to resort to that.

[@slaanynionysus7420]

"It's a curious thing to be born different. You can feel the shape of this person you were expected to be and you find yourself wondering why you aren't that person" This line struck a chord with me, and brought me to tears. thank you :)

[@deathnotehell1]

Honestly same. I had the video on as background noise while playing something else and stopped when I heard him say that.

[@TruthKeepersOfficialHD2]

This struck on a little more than you two Many, many more

[@shakeelali20]

That line at 17:49 actually made me tear up. "Its a curios thing to be born different. You can feel the shape of this person you were expected to be, and you find yourself wondering why you arent that person". Possibly the most poetic and relatable line of dialogue I've ever heard through a KZbin video.

[@Jormyyy]

As someone who is ASD, it hit me really hard too.

[@CoconutFella]

Me too, this line dug deep and twisted as it went

[@joshfinch7041]

when they say words cant hurt you

[@alex.g7317]

I think he’s autistic or some other thing

[@BurnedRemains]

You lack purpose.

[@lyzzle]

What I expected: video about dragons What I got: tears and the feeling of being understood

[@viz2y]

literally 😭

[@mrcriminalpants]

More like dragon the paranuts across yo face

[@RGMRT]

Yeah i can relate

[@georgebeckons539]

THIS MADE ME TEAR UP

[@_philipp__]

You may want to look into autism / ADHD then.

[@ALilBucket]

Therapist here, this was phenomenally vulnerable and I'm sure massive amounts of people can relate. I might even send this to some of my clients who feel isolated and misunderstood. Thank you for your openness and for providing a space for others to express the same feelings and experiences ❤️

[@DudeWhoSaysDeez]

When he mentioned feeling isolated yet happy, I instantly related with my own autism. I think some clients may benefit from videos like this.

[@oswaldmosley5012]

Stop using silly words like "neurodiverse" and just say what you mean (usually mentally ill). Quit making up words for 'retard' because whatever new word you come up with will also become a slur. Therapists are mostly just expensive con-men in any case. Worthless job occupied by people who make money by keeping people mentally unwell.

[@hunterjay5141]

Just sent this to my therapist as well. This is such a beautiful example of a journey on the road to self acceptance. Thanks for the work you do 🤝

[@criticalcommenter]

I find it strange that a totally normal childhood interest is being painted as a mental illness.

[@zufalllx]

Show me ONE person who's NOT 'neurodiverse '.

[@mochamakos159]

i saw this video in my feed and clicked on it thinking, "OOH YAY DRAGONS" but ended it astronomically emotional. this entire thing is exactly how i feel, man. for me it's sharks, but that overwhelming, almost primal feeling of needing to understand them in every way possible is SOOO relatable

[@ilnoediavolon]

16:10 "Fear of being immature [...] made me throw my books away, and get rid of my drawings" That made me so freaking sad. It's like throwing away a part of yourself. Sure, eventually you grow up, but that doesn't mean you have to erase the joy you felt as a child. No matter what people say, how cringe it is, it's going to be a part of you til the end. A few month ago, I redrew some drawing I did as a teenager. I couldn't even begin to explain the joy I felt. As if I were going back in time, and my younger self was sharing her interests with my older self. And this time, the adult actually cared about what I had to say.

[@richardbourton4523]

CS Lewis wrote on this idea, suggesting that few things are as immature as the desire to ‘seem grown up’. True maturity is accepting the things you like as part of who you are, which I think is a beautiful sentiment. It’s childish to hide who you are for fears of seeming childish, be who you are and you might find people who like that stuff too! It’s something I think about quite a lot, especially when other people judge people for their interests.

[@shadowpower1856]

Relatable. I've been rewriting ("remastering", I guess) old stories I made when I was a child. Essentially taking the characters and story beats, and making it more fresh/mature (updating them essentially). It is an amazing experience, like validating my past self in some way. Who knows, perhaps these stories could even see the light of day XD. Even if they don't, rewriting them has been therapeutic.

[@greenhydra10]

Very much a Where the Dragons Went scenario. I actually have the opposite relationship with my stuff to CA. I cling on to my old drawings, toys, and stuffed animals almost as if my life depends on it. A large part of me just wants to hold on to a fragment of happier, simpler times.

[@takuame7]

I did this as well, except with a few well loved video games and my entire Lego bionicle collection about 2 yrs after graduating high school back in 2015....I regret it so much. Thankfully, I never got rid of all the bionicle instruction manuals I collected with those sets.

[@ayzekpie9432]

This is familiar to me. All through elementary school, I cut out animals from my dinosaur books out of paper and made my own evolution tree to play natural history on the bed. Then it hit me "I'm an adult, argh" and I threw out 20 sheets on which I laid out organisms. Fortunately, I did not throw away 300+ carefully selected animals, I also saved other cool childhood projects, some of which was remastered. Now I understand that I will send people talking about the dangers of "staying a kid" to hell for the rest of my life.

[@hampterofficial]

>Drops the most personal and relatable video ever >elaborates >leaves

[@Thtaoy1029]

Chad behavior

[@Marder_IFV]

That's like half (probably more like 30ish%) his videos lol

[@SergeyPupkoMusic]

Legend

[@Mallony]

so relatable holy moly

[@vee-bee-a]

A mic drop moment, man.

[@sanshrayvinesh5167]

If this series was what inspired to start your channel in the long run, it definitely didn't ruin your life. It brought an amazing channel into existence

[@germanomagnone]

in many ways the dragons have given them a push to "fly" in the sky of "curiosities"

[@thebeatles114]

The best channel on KZbin? Yes it is.

[@andrewhamilton4869]

This is the single greatest piece of media I have ever come across. I was pulled to the video by my past love of dragons, D&D, and fantasy. Then I was gut punched by the incredible relatability. You, sir, have done something profound

[@cherryfirefly97]

you throwing away anything "childish" was so heart breaking. especially since it made you so happy. i hate that society breaks children like that

[@joraluzmala]

Im lucky to have uni professors who always said to keep things that make us happy, even if it is childish. Because everyone is a child at heart and keeping a part of it leads to a happy life (most of my professors are huge nerds also lol).

[@julietfischer5056]

Childhood should be a foundation, a starting point. Yes, we will eventually get rid of things as we accumulate experience and knowledge, but it shouldn't be out of shame. 'Get rid of' here can mean giving them to another young person to enjoy, or donating them so that others have a chance to discover the pleasure. (I recently had to declutter, and it was easier to let go of things by imagining the pleasure or use that another person would get from them.)

[@MatthewTheWanderer]

Even though I didn't have a very good childhood, I still keep many items from my childhood, especially things like art. I'm in my 40s now and still hold on to a few things I've had since the '80s, despite moving dozens of times since then. I could never willingly throw away such things.

[@DNR2007]

If you throw away everything "childish", and - for your troubles - end up as an embittered, miserable meatbag muttering about having to wait in line at the supermarket, you have thrown away everything that makes you human.

[@Kanaleah]

I have little to add to this conversation, except for my favorite quote from a novelist on the subject (and a little something extra from a scientist). "Critics who treat 'adult' as a term of approval, instead of as a merely descriptive term, cannot be adult themselves. To be concerned about being grown up, to admire the grown up because it is grown up, to blush at the suspicion of being childish; these things are the marks of childhood and adolescence. And in childhood and adolescence they are, in moderation, healthy symptoms. Young things ought to want to grow. But to carry on into middle life or even into early manhood this concern about being adult is a mark of really arrested development. When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty I read them openly. When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up." - C.S. Lewis And additionally... "If you want your children to be intelligent, read them fairy tales. If you want them to be more intelligent, read them more fairy tales." - Albert Einstein

[@jaywalk9364]

For a video with a lot of dragons, this video was not about dragons. Not even a video essay. This is a love letter - to the self. And a very beautiful one too. Thanks for sharing this intimate piece of yourself to us.

[@estivenamatrix]

Came here for dragons. Stayed for the incredibly relatable childhood experiences. Leaving after crying my eyes out. Thanks for sharing this.

[@GroundbreakGames]

Really glad I’m not the only one having this reaction. Not even sure where all that came from but yeah, this cut deep for some reason.

[@jayeisenhardt1337]

I wanted dragons, kept getting interrupted and skipped most looking for dragons. Still looking for dragons.

[@Geheimnis-c2e]

​@@jayeisenhardt1337the dragon was within you all along

[@skysthelimitvideos]

I was not expecting this video to be so deeply autobiographical and personal. Even more amazing job then usual. I had that “Dragons A Fantasy Made Real” on DVD as a kid and watched it probably a 1000 times.

[@NeoNinjaGames]

How strange it is to find a group of people who all feel isolated in such a connected way, glad I'm not alone

[@Gamblinaddicted]

Autism be crazy

[@Burger-km7ww]

Me too man.

[@mysticz3686]

I always felt like no one understood me, so I learned to do things on my own. Then I come across this video and see so many people like me in the comments talking about how they felt the same. It really is a strange feeling, but it’s a comforting one.

[@tyrant_tarantula]

@@mysticz3686easy to feel alone if you never put yourself out there or seek out like minded people. Oh woe’s of being young

[@nemtudom5074]

We're alone *together!*

[@NinjaAdorable]

17:52 "Its a curious thing to be born different, you can feel the shape of this person you were expected to be" That was legitimately the sentence I have resonated with the most in my life so far!! Thank you for putting that to words!!

[@TheEditedOne]

Just want to give you a shoutout for the phrase "you can feel the shape of the person you were meant to be and wonder why you aren't that person". That's had a lot of impact, hadn't realised that was definitely how I felt.

[@47Jonesy]

truly. My feelings outta his mouth. This is why humans were made to communicate with each other i think. So we can understand who we are personally.

[@LogicIndependent]

@@47Jonesy ye

[@Sly-Moose]

The trans experience

[@KitKitsuneVixen]

​@@Sly-Moose i know right although the actual quote from the video is "you can feel the shape of who you were _expected_ to be", which is like the opposite of what i've experienced. trying to be what was expected from me just felt like an act, or more like improv lol

[@AsuraBoss]

And just like that, you’ve helped me figure out why I just… never could understand people, while obsessively collecting any and all information I could about whatever I though throughout my childhood was the next coolest thing.

[@woah10spac18]

I cannot express to you the extent dragonology ruled my childhood and it is STILL to me the TEXTBOOK on dragon accuracy. You're seriously making me tear up with this, my guy

[@franminanicollier9431]

I also loved that book as a kid, and a similar book about Pirates by a different author. They're such creative works and are educational in that it exposes the reader to new words and expands their view of what dragons can look like to different cultures

[@Wurmze]

Just spent 20 minutes trying to find the dragon book I read as a kid online that did the same for me but no luck 😭 it was the same vibe as dragonology but aimed towards much younger kids, about dragon myths worldwide, had beautiful illustrations most of which were pop up, like the one that sticks out the most in my mind was a page about dragons living behind waterfalls and you could lift up the waterfall flap to see the dragon and it’s hoard behind. Loved that book dearly as a kid

[@GeneralPenemonto]

@@franminanicollier9431 They had several different ones. I know and had 4: Piratology, Dragonology, Monsterology and Wozardology (or magicology? don't remember, but all were done in the same style, with insanely deep "worldbuilding")

[@franminanicollier9431]

@GeneralPenemonto I had a very similar one to Pirateology called Pirates by John Matthews. It didn't really have worldbuilding or "pirate hunter" conceit and instead was written with a more objective narrator voice, but it was similarly lavishly illustrated with replica parchments and pouches with cards, maps, wanted posters, and booklets. It was one of my favorite books as a kid, and what got me obsessed with pirates for a while. I always intended to make the included salmagundi recipe, but never got around to actually doing it, lol.

[@KarlKristofferJohnsson]

"When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up." - C.S. Lewis

[@utkarsh2746]

​@Based_Gigachad_001An idea of being "grown up" constructed from what we saw our parents do as seen from the lens of a child. For me it was the time i realized that I had, at some point, become better at keeping track of bills and such, than my parents. This led to the realization that they are just as lost and stumbling from one day to the next as me.

[@utkarsh2746]

@Based_Gigachad_001 lol thenks.

[@Karamazov9]

Too bad he didn’t put away his bigotry and bad apologetics

[@jamyanvance]

@@Karamazov9 I can't express the amount of anger I felt while reading the literal retardation you've put out onto the internet. Be a better person and think rationally, before being belligerently idiotic.

[@Mary-dc6js]

​@@Karamazov9doesn't mean he didn't have wisdom, regardless of his personal views.

[@GunterThePenguinHatesHugs]

_"He might be autistic but darn it my boy can work a grill'_ -Senshi

[@thebutler4471]

That’s what I was thinking because I have it and his point reflect on me almost perfectly

[@W1CKED710]

@@thebutler4471 yeah me too lol

[@ŕíćéAvarice]

Pan 🍞

[@Kardur_Wrath_of_the_Abyss]

I also have autism

[@GunterThePenguinHatesHugs]

@@Kardur_Wrath_of_the_Abyss then get grillin'! 🫡

[@skolvikings5445]

When I was a child I was obsessed with dragons as well. My family never spent money on Pokemon or Yu-Gi-Oh cards for me so I went a different direction. As a young creative I drew dragons constantly and created a game of my own. “DragonMon.” I bought and cut index cards and put my drawings in baseball card sleeves and hand drew different dragon creatures inspired by the animation I saw through other card games and television. I made hundreds of cards and made personalized cards for my friends and family and taught them my game. Dragons were the pinnacle of my childhood fantasy. I really enjoyed the personal connection I had with this video. It brought back some memories I’ve neglected or suppressed for a long time.

[@jonathanj8303]

0:20 Cardboard is basically a gateway drug at this point. Dragons, robots...

[@greenhydra10]

When I was really little, there was a big box I would crawl into and play in all the time. The good old days.

[@classifiedveteran9879]

​@leanja6926 just make sure that they use their cutting tools safely. _(I once cut myself real bad with a pair of ordinary scissors when I was 6.)_

[@jonathanj8303]

@@greenhydra10 One of my all time favourite bits in Calvin and Hobbs is Calvin explaining to one of his parents that "of course the transmogrifier isn't that limited in what it can turn you into. There's plenty of space to write extra labels next to the control pointer." Unfettered imagination *and* future proof design.

[@bavettesAstartes]

"IMAGINATION" Spongebob, inside a cardboard box

[@frostdova]

lol i rememebr making a full suit of armor out of cardboard

[@snqko]

I clicked on this video expecting a neat commentary on the role of dragons in literature. I didn't expect to hear someone eloquently describe some of the feelings and parts of myself I've been struggling to understand and describe for years. This is one of my favourite videos on KZbin, thank you.

[@mynym4543]

I come from Ireland, an island famous for not having any snakes. Our local dragon? The ollphéist (lit. great beast/worm), a giant snake that lives in rivers and lakes. My suspicion is that it originated with Irish merchants who visited other places, saw snakes, thought they were really cool, and brought the concept back with an exaggerated story or two. It certainly wouldn’t be the only example of Irish folklore taking an ordinary animal and just making it bigger…

[@Window4503]

Kinda sounds like Leviathan

[@NuclearspartanX]

@@Window4503 That's likely not a coincidence. Leviathan comes from the mythology of the Indo-Europeans, of whom the Irish, as well as many other cultures with legends of a giant serpent, are descended. Look up comparative mythology, it's pretty cool stuff.

[@soccerandtrack10]

​@@NuclearspartanXim pretty sure its jewish=the 1st half of the book. Unless 2 kinds...

[@soccerandtrack10]

​@@NuclearspartanXor its another name...

[@koderamerikaner5147]

@@NuclearspartanX It's refreshing to see that someone besides my friends and I knows about comparative mythology of Indo-Europeans and the current anthropological understanding of Proto-Indo-European religion. If I remember correctly, the Native Americans also have a similiar understanding of a great serpent, possibly meaning it's a myth as old as the ANE (Ancient North Eurasians). IIRC, same applies with the World Tree and the afterlife.

[@SolarBlademaster]

This video slipped under my radar when it first released, but it's reappeared in my feed and so finally watched it. And my lord the relatability when it came to you talking about Dragonology consuming your life as a child was off the charts!

[@smilestheemo3365]

My mom recently found my old copy of Dragonology in an old moving box. So many memories came back rereading that book. I wonder if the author knew he would have such an impact on children that it would invoke such emotion all these years later.

[@Thunderfaaal]

I have that same book

[@Kardur_Wrath_of_the_Abyss]

@@Thunderfaaal me too

[@AristasTheMonsterHunter]

I had 2 of those books. I knew they where fake, but I would lie if I said they had nothing to do with igniting my passion for taxonomy and ethology. And here I am now, studing videogame disign with the purpose to teach others about the complexity and beauty of living beings through fantasy. I feel the sudden urge to find those books again.

[@himesilva]

Those "ology" books were so fire, I loved them. They really made it feel like you were discovering some ancient, secret manuscripts

[@parkerkruck5768]

Right bro pirateology had me ready to be the next jack sparrow

[@ashura9706]

All fun and games till you get to plain school biology

[@zealousrecluse595]

OMG YES! For me it was the ology books and Dinotopia and things of that sort. I have now become more grounded out and mature, but I wish I still had that imagination. I want my imaginary friends back-😂😅

[@raphaelbriganti6030]

yup!!! They were great

[@brandonhalvorsen2185]

I lived on wizardology and dragonology when I was a kid. I just got a copy of dragonology to share with my son now that he is getting old enough to appreciate it.

[@DarrieusJohn]

I clicked expecting a fun video about dragons and now I'm in tears.

[@defnotteek]

I was a proud owner of Dragonology as a kid. I recognized that book as soon as you showed it. I remember the art inside of it vividly.

[@a_person_u_kn0w]

Same my favourite page was the map showing where all of the dragons lived

[@TheLostDrifter]

Reminds me of Guillermo del Toro’s quote “Since childhood, I've been faithful to monsters. I have been saved and absolved by them, because monsters, I believe, are patron saints of our blissful imperfection, and they allow and embody the possibility of failing,”

[@marciliojunior9599]

GDT =

[@nurrodenthyme1671]

I had never heard that quote, and now I have thanks to you. That really lit something in me just now. Cheers!

[@catbatrat1760]

Wow... :')

[@PBart7]

I can't trust people who *don't* think dragons are the sickest thing ever Edit: Ayoo 12K wtf

[@danieladamczyk4024]

I don't.

[@absolutionone]

​@@danieladamczyk4024 Alright, so what is?

[@danieladamczyk4024]

@@absolutionone As artist i trying to figure it out. Dragons are on this same place as giant robots in cool ranking. For me that a bit generic.

[@Elvis.D99]

​@@danieladamczyk4024I don't trust you! Booo

[@danieladamczyk4024]

@@Elvis.D99 I understud. I wish you good day with dragons.

[@AnneAskins]

"You can feel the shape of the person you were expected to be and you find yourself wondering why you aren't that person" hit hard

[@shadowwolfhellsresident8055]

I know, I've spent my whole life thinking those thoughts. As much as it sucks its kinda great to know there are other people that are like that too.

[@millz373]

This was the part that got me too

[@catalyst3512]

That cuts deep... Damn.

[@Khann_2102]

😢

[@tifa2733]

Made me cry.... This is so deep, too deep and I was not ready for the depth.

[@LegosSnake]

Dragonology was the first time I remember being completely immersed by a piece of art. I had been obsessed with the how to train your dragon movies and books for years before I discovered the book. But the way the book was written and presented, not as a funny dragon book but as a piece of mythical lore that poked into our real world from a world of the fantastical.

[@declanshannon8561]

Man the bit at the end where you changed just because you were worried what other people might think, hits close to home.

[@martenmaarten]

same here! it was already such a comfort to see others who've went through the same struggles, but especially the bit at the end where he picks up drawing again was just really beautiful. thats the kind of mentality i strive towards

[@ViralWinter]

This is basically adulthood summed up for all people today lol (possibly all people in history)

[@Pyritie]

@@ViralWinter I didn't change and ended up as a furry (/scalie, whatever) instead, so, not a whole lot better lol

[@Eclipse_101]

This video was very healing for me to watch. I myself was a very autistic, dragon-obsessed child who shouted “that’s a WYVERN” and other things such as that. I’m okay with that. That just shows that I care. Occasionally I still will- just with less venom, and more of a “this is something I care about so I want to talk about it” tone. I am not angry when someone “wrongly” classifies one. I just go “yeah, that’s a dragon. Wyverns are dragons.”

[@JackFrost0810]

As I've realized now, its like the rectangles and squares thing, All wyverns are dragons, but not all dragons are wyverns

[@pocketinfinity6733]

inside boiling hatred swells, "wyveeeeeeerrrrrnnnnnnn"

[@blackdragon5274]

I'm the opposite, autistically obsessed with broadening the classification of dragons beyond what d&d decided only like 40 years ago.

[@hughstout9951]

@@JackFrost0810yes! This is what I've been saying all along! I like "All eels are fish, but not all fish are eels". Since it describes that 2 things that might not look similar can be the same. Like Chinese dragons and western dragons

[@zacharymoss2994]

As a 29 year old man on the Autism spectrum and obsessed with monsters and animals, I find this video quite nice and therapeutic.

[@thelampgod]

Memory unlocked. I don't know what happened to that Dragonology book- but I was OBSESSED with it. The cover, the color of the pages, the texture of the book bindings, and the in depth drawings... they captivated me in a way I have not experienced since.

[@MrThekill2012]

Its a canon event i lost mine too even my gf lost it at some point of her life it seem like Dragonlogy is designated to dissapear when we grow older 😂

[@KainRocks777]

I'm glancing up at my copy of it right now lol

[@toiletball8420]

SAMMEEEE

[@Oguh608]

Same. After looking it up online I believe I had this book as a kid aswell. It's a really faint memory but it's there.

[@georgesheng5500]

I saw the book, but I FELT the marbles. It awoke a buried memory within me that I did read that book at some point in my childhood

[@VioletBarrettVerd]

1:34 Dragonology, I have that book! I can’t believe I’m seeing it in a KZbin video

[@10Bendog]

I've seen so many people online, including you now too, expressing their past experiences as teens about how they would turn their backs and try to distance themselves from the things they liked as kids, only to come back around to it when becoming adults. Every time I hear this kind of story, I remember how I sometimes felt the same way when I was in my teens. But I also remember being too stubborn at the time to give up on the things I like (instead just opting to keep them to myself and not let people know that I "still liked those kiddie stuff". And now I'm grateful to teen me for being so stubborn and not giving up on my interests. Hearing you say how you disposed of so many of the stuff that related to your interest in dragons made me really sad, because I know present day me would be devastated if past me had thrown away any of my drawings or comics or toys or whatnot.

[@Kanaleah]

The words of C.S. Lewis should be repeated ad infinitum in this situation. "Critics who treat 'adult' as a term of approval, instead of as a merely descriptive term, cannot be adult themselves. To be concerned about being grown up, to admire the grown up because it is grown up, to blush at the suspicion of being childish; these things are the marks of childhood and adolescence. And in childhood and adolescence they are, in moderation, healthy symptoms. Young things ought to want to grow. But to carry on into middle life or even into early manhood this concern about being adult is a mark of really arrested development. When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty I read them openly. When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up." I think this is why so many adults come back to childhood fascinations that they discard in their young adult years. Because once you have completed the metamorphosis into an adult, you have no fear of being seen as childish any longer.

[@TwentySeventhLetter]

A really important message I received from my older sister when I was a kid expressed this sentiment succinctly: "When you're a kid, you like Disney. When you're a teenager, you hate disney. When you're an adult, you love Disney." Of course Disney is a stand in for whatever thing brings you joy, but it's a message that stuck with me and that I always appreciate hearing others share.

[@RoseBaggins]

I was similar, except I never wanted to throw anything away. I think I was lucky in having a friend group who are still into all the things we enjoyed as kids. Or, well, basically, we were all nerds, lol.

[@raccoon2968]

I’m glad I took the third option. Just continue loving my interest. Sometimes I just kept it to myself. But I don’t think I ever told myself to stop and I’m glad so. Tho at times I felt maybe I did so but that was with others who did understand, maybe that still goes with keeping it to myself but oh well. Glad I can always get excited seeing anything dragon/dinosaur related

[@purplezekrom]

Same! I started to feel embarrassed about liking dragons so much around fourth and fifth grade, but I could never bring myself to stop liking it. I'm so glad I have friends who get it :)

[@Ari-gc7sz]

This video isn't about dragons; it's about us. It's about kids who spent their childhoods filled with fantasies and stories, searching for them in every sea, valley, and ridge. It's about fixation, isolation, and being different. It's the story of our lives-about growing up and cringing at our younger selves, only to realize that perhaps we were happier before, and to feel that we've let society shackle us. It's about understanding that we're all different, and that we all love to explore the unknown. After reading numerous quotes about storytelling and how dragons symbolize fantasy, I came to realize, 'We don't want a dragon to be real because we want to escape reality; we want them to be real because we want to enjoy our reality.'

[@P4r4k]

The real dragons are the friends we made along the way

[@olwiz]

But thats the thing with dragons (and fae, and gods, and other things in myth)- theyre all about us. Nowadays because fantasy/fiction they reflect what we see as majestic and awesome (power in a good way). Back then they were about our fears, or in the asian dragons our awe at the sheer power (but wise) of nature. I any case they were always about us. There wouldnt be a dragon to be slayed without a george slaying it. No spreading plague dragons without cities being felled by plague. No sharizards without a pokemon trainer to catch it. 'There be dragons' the maps were full of. Each and every one of those were actually about the countless seafarer souls who got lost at sea or had a partial encounter with death and some uncanny shadows. Which, who knows, maybe they were dragons... no, i correct myself. They were dragons. The real ones. The immortal majestic beings that sleep in our minds and hearts

[@ProSkillzDragonGal]

your comment literally just made me tear up

[@ProSkillzDragonGal]

@@olwiz "They were dragons. The real ones. The immortal majestic beings that sleep in our minds and hearts" I have never seen a quote that hits home more than this one

[@Ari-gc7sz]

@@olwiz This. This is really beautiful.

[@inaminayo5327]

This is a weird parallel to draw, but Overly Sarcastic Productions actually mentioned this in one of their videos, and I think they put it very succinctly. "The question is not 'Why are there so many different types of dragons'?, the question is "Why do we CALL so many DIFFERENT creatures dragons??" They further pointed out that the term "Dragon" is a category, not a definition. In the same way that "Demon" can mean anything evil and hellish, or "Fairy" can mean anything mystic and illusiary. I think that explains it very well.

[@BasicallyBaconSandvichIV]

Which episode was this again? Might need to rewatch that.

[@modenoatr]

@@BasicallyBaconSandvichIV Their Trope Talk on Dragons, natch :p

[@BasicallyBaconSandvichIV]

​@@modenoatr AHA! That's why I couldn't remember! I hardly watch trope talks, mainly just Red's videos about myths, legends, folklore and the like. Might need to watch this one though.

[@BasicallyBaconSandvichIV]

@@modenoatr ​AHA! That's why I couldn't remember! I hardly watch trope talks, mainly just Red's videos about myths, legends, folklore and the like. Might need to watch this one though.

[@pills-]

I would even put a lot of modern monsters into the dragon category: Graboids from tremors, aliens from the Alien movie, mimics from Edge of Tomorrow. The list keeps going.

[@wellkeurs]

I had that same exact Dragonology book as a kid. The mental shock i had when I saw it in the video. With all the gems on the cover i used to think that it was a lost treasure and hid it in my pirate chest with pretty much all the shiny things i found back then. You made my day.

[@garyprimmjr7392]

The dinosaur kid to dragon kid pipeline is so real. I haven’t been that kid in a while; I’m 23 and life has definitely been life’ing; but there’s always a smile on my face whenever something dinosaur related or dragon related comes around. That smile lets me know that despite everything that’s happened, that loner kid who drew dinosaurs and dragons (who once had that Dragonology book) is still in there.

[@Techhunter_Talon]

I watched that show. 'Dragons: A Fantasy Made Real' was pretty cool and I loved their attempts at explaining how a dragon would work biologically if they were a real animal.

[@Revenant-oq9ts]

Same. And I owned the Dragonology book too. I think I was one book short of completing the "ology" series, come to think of it.

[@koharumi1]

Does it do both eastern and western dragons?

[@grey8288]

​@@koharumi1The focus is on western European dragons, if I remember right.

[@charlw3583]

​@koharumi6461 Technically, yes, there is mention of both eastern and western dragons during the "history" portion, but the focus of the documentary is on a traditional European dragon which they find a preserved body of. Its a really good film though and available on KZbin definitely worth a watch; the animation is really decent for how old it is too.

[@LORRANANASTÁCIO-i9i]

YES ​@@charlw3583

[@sytmor]

Your video reminded me of when I was 16 and survived my house burning down. It was a total loss, including the clothes I was wearing because they were damaged by rouge ash. I felt like my past self had died, and everything that ever proved I existed was gone. It turned out my 11th grade teacher kept all of our journals for the year and was going to gift them to us at Graduation, and I hold onto those sad, depressing, and heartbreaking journals so dearly. I was already going through horrific trauma and mental health struggles and was in such a hard and dark place, but it finally feels like I existed, and that everything that I remember happening was real. I’m turning 22 in a month and I wish I had my childhood pictures, books, drawings, and diaries. I remember how embarrassing I thought they all were at the time because of how my family and peers treated it, but now I want nothing more than to share them with the supportive and lovely friends and family I have now. I have no good way to end this but thank you for sharing your experience and posting this video, it was comforting.

[@LogicIndependent]

Keep going, life worth it

[@anthonylamina]

Happy Birthday!

[@alpha_2.0319]

There is something about you that make your videos so peaceful, calm and inspiring

[@laurad7228]

There was this guy drawing dragons at my school. I joined him a few times and it was great fun. Sadly we kinda got bullied out of it. But you reminded me of him. Hope he's doing alright and found a way to use his obsessions to create beautiful things.

[@grimsladeleviathan3958]

@@laurad7228 I had a friend like that in 8th grade. Well, "friend." We weren't all that close, but he was a really great artist and I like looking at his drawings. Guy was amazing at it. But he was the quiet, shy type, and because he spent a lot of time drawing too, it got him bullied quite a lot. The quiet artist kid, typical target imo. Now, I'm not extremely close to him, but I don't let people talk down or bully others like that. So I stood up for him any opportunities I get. I'm a decently big guy, so I can push dickheads without too much fear. That's basically our "friendship," yeah. I push the bullies away, and he shares his works with me. I'd say that's fair. But he passed away the next year, hit by a car. I didn't know what to say when the teacher told the class. I went to his funeral because, he was a good guy, just a little shy is all. I'm 20 now, but damn do I miss him. Wished I got along with him more when he was here...

[@mafrarth]

Clicked on this video because I'm hyperfixated on dragons and ended it tearing up on one of the most relatable descriptions of being neurodivergent ever. As an autistic man with late diagnosis, thank you

[@Warlord_Gruktak_Rukrak]

Fr and i love it😂

[@TomorrowWeLive]

🤮

[@SirToaster9330]

I don't think he was autistic just obsessive

[@mafrarth]

@@SirToaster9330 the autistic is me, I don't know if he is or not just affirming that his description fit very well the experience of not being neurotypical

[@cyanic-1042]

I will say, I’m turning 22 this year, and as a child whenever I was feeling down I’d just imagine them. Immense beasts towering above, their wings sending storms in each beat. I would occasionally imagine having my own wings, scales, fiery breath, and complete freedom. HTTYD was definitely fuel to my fire as well haha I almost lost that part of me in middle school, but I held onto it. it got me through my toughest years. The abuse, the lost friendships, the sadness. Dragons were my escape. Being an adult, I’d say I love dragons now more than ever. I’m not afraid anymore to say “yeah, I just really like dragons!”

[@kravalier]

You can't imagine how much I resonate with this video. I actually had THAT exact dragon classification book as well (only in German), made my own little books with fake scales and all in its likeness and even started a yu-gi-oh-inspired self drawn card game - of course, only with dragons. I also only wore dragon t-shirts until one day, around the time i was thirteen or so, I got some polo shirts and suddenly my classmates (and especially girls, which became interesting at that time) talked to me. Since I did not want to lose my new found place in the group, I pretty much abandonned all the dragon stuff and adopted a whole new persona. Up to this day, I never really revisited my dragon onsession, but your video made me really sentimental (who is cutting onions around here?). I think I still have that book in the basement somewhere. :)

[@levi_octavian]

From ages 6 to 14 my main autistic special interest was dragons.Your speech at 3:24 really hit home and struck a cord personally. That loneliness and isolation, struggling with acceptance. Despite being fictional creatures they helped ground me in a confusing and unfair world at the time.

[@thegreatdreamer8377]

I wanted to come here and say that this video spoke to me on a fundamental level. I distinctually remember pushing my love of dinosaurs down during Middleschool and Highschool, thinking I should grow up, now I have accepted myself more and am currently working on a collection of every Dinosaur card in MTG

[@dirtywhitellama]

You might as well be yourself, you're the only one who can.

[@cosmicspacething3474]

Damn, good luck. There are websites for ordering specific cards if you want to look those up

[@Soldadodelasombra]

Another dinosaur fan? May the Sun Dinosaur God shine upon your quests

[@Wyrm7774]

Ghisath players best players

[@arturoaguilar6002]

Ixalan must had been a really fun set for you. Every time certain guy played a dinosaur card from that set, he always hummed the Jurassic Park theme...

[@Kelto28]

I can't fully describe how much I relate to practically every word of this video, from the documentary->draconology->HTTYD pipeline, to the drawings and the shame, and now the healing, I guess I would've never taken off the shame and fully embraced the love for the draconic without MTG and so many other games and books to build a community around. But hearing this is something... else, like hearing my life being narrated to me. Thanks

[@prasetyodwikuncorojati2434]

The same channel that aired Draconology also created Mermaid "documentary" with same premise, what if they're exist and how they evolving. Honestly the mermaid looks way more disturbing than dragon thanks for the humanoid form that giving uncanny valley effect. Yet it also have bleak ending

[@skipat2487]

This video spoke to me on a very personal level. I have the exact same books as you and was also instantly hooked when I saw the trailer for "How to train a dragon" on the news when I was a kid. It was my absolute favorite film and my mom had to put it in the dvd player every weekend so I could watch it. I also wanted to categorize dragons and made whole sketchbooks full of drawings and dragon categories. I think my obsession with dragons formed me as a person in more ways than any other interest has had and inspired me to choose the career path I am on today. I am so happy to see so many other former dragon obsessed kids in these comments

[@fluffybluedrgn2706]

This video has never been a more accurate representation of what my childhood was. As an autistic girl myself I felt super outcast for my love of “boy things” like dragons, archeology, and Pokémon. I still have that dragonology book. And like you said around 16:37 I almost threw it out too- along with all my drawings. I’m so happy I didn’t. Thank you for making this video- it explains my journey better than I could ever explain it.

[@samuraijosh1595]

Pokemon is watched by both boys and girls

[@acommenter6737]

Anthropology is pretty evenly gender split, there’s plenty of female archaeologists

[@javelynhobinson6405]

@@samuraijosh1595 Yes, but it is usually linked more with boys. When people think of "A kid who plays Pokemon/watches Pokemon", it is linked with boys. Largely because of its male protagonist in the original and then especially because it involves battle and such, which is linked more stereotypically with boy media. It involves far more stereotypical boy-things than stereotypical-girl ones.

[@fluffybluedrgn2706]

If it helps to clarify for everyone- all the girls around me were in Justice clothing, wanted to be ballerinas, and talked about horses and princess 24/7. Nothing wrong with those things of course- but I was super outcast from what was supposed to be my community. I felt pressured to throw out my out interests in favor of the majorities interests. Hope that clears some things

[@katherineryan7126]

I'm autistic, and I definitely relate to wanting things to fit into neat little categories. That's part of why I like worldbuilding, because I get to shape a world that conforms to my desire for order and balance, and I think that helps me be okay with the fact that the real world isn't like that.

[@Erocksoco]

Yeah, I felt a lot of this video for that same reason.

[@c.d.rstudios4691]

I'm autistic and I just wanted to know everything about the transformers

[@ІванІндукаєв]

Same❤

[@plebisMaximus]

Couldn't have worded it better myself. It can be rough to live in a world you aren't built for.

[@Skorpychan]

@@c.d.rstudios4691 I have a friend like that. He also knows everything there is about comic book lore, which made him absolutely invaluable for the MCU movies. It meshes well with my obsession with vehicles and physics and worldbuilding. The RPG campaigns we made were pretty epic.

[@roryarcher6014]

I had begun seeking an ADHD diagnosis after pretty much getting violently bullied in middle school for my obsession with Star Wars--I did the same thing, classifying *everything,* trying to blend together books and cartoons and movies into a cohesive narrative for my non-interested peers. I hated the passive aggressive bullying, but I couldn't help myself. I think I found that it was worse to hide it and conform than to just let myself be an outcast and be weird. I eventually found people who had the same struggles I did, and I only found them cause I stopped hiding that part of myself away. Great video essay. Got me a bit teary eyed.

[@radthadd]

Back in 2007 ish, as a kid me and a friend realized you could take Star wars & gi joe action figures and mix the pieces together making our own "troopers"

[@athenaraines]

It is better, in my opinion, to be hated for being who you are than to be accepted for being someone else.

[@alexbrookma]

lol, gay af

[@pedroscoponi4905]

This is both painfully and delightfully relatable. Thanks for talking about it. :)

[@realkittykatluvr]

knowing there are other people out there who have felt the exact same way that i have before is really comforting. growing up feeling like you’re the odd one out is so isolating, especially when its because of traits you can’t control. i’ve learned to come to terms with these traits and instead of feeling ashamed for liking things so intensely, i’m going to allow myself to be happy. i hope anyone who is currently struggling with feeling “different” can learn to do this too, because nobody is ever truly alone and you deserve to feel unbridled joy and love.

[@DeusKnight]

As someone who can't stay on one topic for long and has to jump from interest to interest to keep occupied, I've always been fascinated with people who have this very deep and passionate attraction to certain topics and the way they speak of them. I really enjoyed your video, I hope to see more like it.

[@hussaindrees5781]

What a pointless comment

[@joshualawrence2963]

Well i personally LOVE your comment 😂. I think i definitely sit more towards “very deep and passionate attraction” than “jump from interest to interest.” Because of that difference in each other, you’re pretty fascinating to me too! Lol ^^

[@cyborgchicken3502]

​@@hussaindrees5781 what a pointless response... In fact I'd argue that yours is even more pointless... At least OPs comment has some expression behind it and some kind of meaning for them, and judging by the number of likes, some people connected with it and could relate ... What purpose does your comment serve other than just being a jerk online?

[@hussaindrees5781]

@@cyborgchicken3502 What a pointless response

[@rixairu]

@@hussaindrees5781 are you a nihilist by chance?

[@Muircat]

"It's curious to be born different. You can feel the shape of this person you were expected to be, and you keep finding yourself wondering why you aren't that person." That bar destroyed me, man. That is exactly what I've been feeling since I was 8 or 9. This whole video was therapeutic to listen to. Thank you for making it.

[@remonahurst2606]

I couldn't agree more

[@NOBLE60000]

Same here ;w;

[@MrBrownLostHisM00]

Bro was cooking with gas with that one

[@EasterGuy-vn5sp]

I read a book and got obsessed with dragons. Then I went to school, and in the library I found out about dinosaurs. I spent hours at evenings, trying to write down and memorise every dinosaur type. I still have this old notebook. A lot I still remember, a lot I have forgotten over time. 😢

[@catpaw3339]

This video really made me feel better knowing I wasn't alone in my little child yearning to search for dragons

[@drummerofawe]

I'm a big language nerd and I love that you mentioned the idea of comparative mythology. Among Indo-European cultures, I believe the dragon-slaying myth is one of the best attested and most concretely proposed as a reconstructed proto-myth, which could at least begin to account for some of the creature's spread in Europe and parts of Asia and the Middle-East. Ever since I learned about it, I've been captivated by the idea of this phrase, 'he slew the serpent', passed down for generations among multiple cultures now thousands of years removed from their common origin.

[@vardamir0397]

look at the tree of life at 10:35. Now, I know this isn't upon millions of years, but I bet a similar graph could be made going all the way back to the first traces of human history, or even simply recorded art...and we'd find dragons and their appearance through the centuries, across humanity ...these legends you say have gone down from bloodlines to bloodlines, perhaps they could be traced from names to their derivate families, trying to map out dragons through human genealogy could be incredibly interesting as a field of anthropology...

[@Beryllahawk]

My son has ADHD, and he and I have been having a lot of discussions about that lately. I heard so much here that echoes what he's told me, how he experiences the world, how he categorizes almost everything. And I've come to realize that I do too. Maybe it's because humans are so drawn to patterns, maybe it's something else. But listening to you, I realized something more. I had that rich imaginary life when I was a kid, and incredibly...I still do. I never lost it, or pushed it away - never conformed, still don't, and still don't give two shits if I ever "fit in" with any larger group. And for the first time in these forty-mumble years of my life, I'm really glad about that. And I'm glad you've come to a place where you can accept and treasure that imagination for yourself as well. Sending hugs to all of y'all out there who might need one. Please be weird, and be happy in that weirdness - it's what makes us, US.

[@LordAryu]

I dealt with undiagnosed ADHD for 23 out of 25 years of living. Your words brought tears into my eyes. Your son is really fortunate to have a mom like you. Thank you and best wishes!

[@Beryllahawk]

@@LordAryu Hugs!

[@a.pierce7623]

This is the first video of yours that not only made me cry. But feel so impactful, so, understood, in a way I haven’t ever experienced. Sincerely, thank you.

[@wagiqwq]

Who else loves dragons.

[@someguywithalowbudget1320]

Meeeee!!!

[@galigaystorm8051]

Me

[@acanadianderg4035]

Me three!

[@Azuli-Studios]

Who doesn’t?

[@Staide]

Here!!!

[@zacharymoss2994]

16:29 I'm on the Autism spectrum, I'm about to be 30 next month, and i tell you never throw away your old books. Give them to someone you love, like a family member or a friend, perhaps your niece or nephew, donate them to a school, a church or library, or a resale shop, or keep them in a box till you have a wife and some kids and give the books to your kid(s). Treasures like books should never be thrown away unless it is the most extreme circumstances. Even when I turn 30 I'll never give up my obsession with monsters especially dragons and dinosaurs.

[@vashtic2036]

Tangentially related; I went through a big dragon phase too (I'm talking jewellery, art both bought and made, glow in the dark shirts, and books books books) and last year, my mum sent me a big box of all my old dragon stuff, including about a dozen books featuring them. I'm not that into dragons anymore, and was never going to read those books again, so I advertised them as free to a good home, and within the hour had a mother asking if she could come get them ASAP for her own young, dragon obsessed child. Later that night, she messaged me letting me know that I'd made her kid's week and thanking me- the feeling of passing on things that brought me so much joy to someone who was just as excited about them as I had been (maybe even more so, since I had built up that collection over years of Christmases, birthdays, and saving up dollars I found on the ground, and they'd gotten the whole lot in one box) was something really special. Books really are treasures, and sharing them is definitely the way to go.

[@Magus_Union]

Yeah, I'm a bit surprised that the video didn't touch on this. Sympathizing with the 'Other' has always been a reoccurring theme in my life. It wouldn't be till I was almost 34 that I would be diagnosed with Level 1 ASD. Growing up I always knew that I'm 'different' from everyone, yet couldn't put a finger on why. My equal measured obsessions were just as described as this videos. Hell, I still have an immense love for everything 'dragon' as well, lol.

[@v.j.bartlett]

Love dragons and monsters. Became a writer and artist so I can create my own. And I'm ASD so go figure.

[@umumah1]

What does you being autistic have anything to do with the rest of your comment

[@zacharymoss2994]

@Magus_Union when I saw his video on sympathy for monsters, I meant to type on how the cartoons I watched like gargoyles, beast wars,digimon and pokemon, and growing up with autism made me realize why I felt such love for non human animals, I saw myself in such monsters. When I was in high school, I saw videos on KZbin about how people didn't like people with autism, being seen as too strong and uncontrollable, too weird and wild and felt more closer to animals, aliens and robots. But when I heard the song Animals careless and free, saw where the wild things are and re-watch the cartoons I enjoyed, I thought if being on the Autism spectrum makes me a monster, fine I'll take it as a badge of honor, knowing the famous people with autism that made the modern world possible, I'm proud to be on the Autism spectrum.

[@netchish]

i dont think ive ever seen anyone whos life and story about dragons synced up with mine so harmoniously. I've had the exact same experiences, saw the same documentary, had the same books (mostly) and had always been "othered" throughout my whole life. bullied, called weird, had people actually throw my dragon creations of pipecleaner over a fence before feeling bad by how upset it made me feel. only difference is...i wasn't alone. I've always had my best friend, someone who became drawn into the same things as me just by us sitting in class together by chance. and she's my best friend even all these years later. we never grew out of a "weird dragon phase" we just evolved. drawing, creating, imagining, creating stories. I have hundreds of pipecleaner dragons that we've made in my closet that I've never dared thrown away. and still occasionally make some even all these years later. we've talked about the "dragon paradox" before, many times, and its something I've always and will continue to be fascinated about. there's a documentary somewhere out there that talks about Cresseda Cowell's inspirations growing up (she's the original creator of how to train your dragon and wrote all the books) that I feel is very close to the reason why dragons exist. i think its wonder, curiosity. the potential of what could be killing the livestock or sleeping in a mountain that's suspisously shaped like a slumbering dragon. they're real all right, and they're everywhere too. But theyre only real because we dream of them to be.

[@aaron_accordion]

The most relatable video I didn’t know I needed to see today. “I think it’s important to make peace with your past selves, instead of trying to bury them.” Thank you

[@yikes3551]

writing this through tears. as a kid i also had this obsession. i had a friend who i would watch httyd and play skylanders with. she had a BUNCH of dragon figurines that we would go into her backyard to play with and make deep lore about. we made them fly and fight and hide in her moms plants. she had a copy of dragonology that we read together. i read the “Wings of Fire” books and would talk about them with my friend. i loved the classification of the different types of dragons. i often found myself sad- nearly in tears- over the fact that dragons weren’t real and that i couldn’t ride one. i wanted to fly in the clouds and being in the forest like hiccup did. i wanted to go into a mountain and find a dragon sleeping on a pile of gold like bilbo. i would draw dragons like you did. i looked up tutorials online so i could get their anatomy right. every time i saw a dragon in a piece of media i was so excited. but when i went home and talked about it, my brothers made fun of me for it. and i felt that shame that teenage-you felt. so i stopped sharing it. and then that friend moved away. i didn’t go over to peoples houses to play ‘dragons’ or monster high anymore. i still had that fascination. but i was ashamed. luckily, my oldest brother shared the love of fantasy. as i got older, we grew closer. and i could “nerd out” with him. after all, he’s the one who read the hobbit to me as a bedtime story. how to train your dragon still fills me with glee, as it does for many other people. i still have the Wings of Fire books on my shelves. i now play D&D. i wish i never felt shame over my interests. i wish that childhood obsession and wonder stayed forever. but it has evolved into a different passion that i will gladly “nerd out” over today. and i’m glad you do too :) i’m also glad to see so many people in the comments who connected to this. maybe in another universe we were all friends as kids and played “dragons” in each other’s backyards.

[@joshualoiacono5488]

^^^this comment

[@t0can230]

I love wings of fire

[@almightyzaza9594]

WINGS OF FIRE MENTIONED

[@trollyXD]

Brother in Christ you made me tear up so hard

[@aidanmatthewgalea7761]

only real ones know about the cursed racism crown

[@CMK-kk6ch]

This is so incredibly relatable. I created a taxonomy, too. I have (or had, once) pages and pages of handwritten notes where I attempted to sort literally every dragon from every book with dragons in it in my library into that taxonomy. I drew so many pictures that I can actually point to some of your pieces of art and guess which "How to Draw Dragons" book you were working with at the time. (The sea serpent from 5:59 loosely suggests DragonArt by Jessica Peffer, for instance.) I did not have quite as unfortunate an end to my fixation as you - mine just faded, with time, but just like you they're still with me, in a way. There's a joy in that. Thank you for reminding me of it.

[@Frentoags]

I remember becoming so OBSESSED with dragons when the first HTTYD movie came out, recently I rewatched the movies, specifically the first one several times. And honestly I still love dragons so much, I can't help but be fascinated by them and the mystery surrounding them. This video really brought back some feelings though, that burning passion for something so particular, specifically dragons, I know it was more of a personal thing and about being a bit of an outcast, which I can relate to a bit aswell, but the dragooons. They were such a strong interest of mine, so seeing someone else having had that same love for these creatures just made me tear up a little, thank you.

[@austinbaker8042]

This masterpiece is a PERFECT description of an Enneagram Five. The highs and lows, deepest fears and deepest desires. Beautifully made and well said.

[@nuker6724]

I remember when I was a kid in elementry school, and we had to write a paper about a subject we liked. I chose to write about dragons and because of that some of my classmates started making fun of me, because it was "not a real subject". Got an 8/10 for it and never stopped liking dragons

[@DragonBallistic]

I know that feeling a lot. Was obsessed with dragons too. Now I am obsessed with the bizarre, outlandish, weird and eldritch.

[@Ikxi]

Can still fit dragons into that description haha

[@DragonBallistic]

@@Ikxi Well, since dragons can possess any qualities, physical or metaphysical… yes. Very flexible and vague entities.

[@Crawleys_Wahoo]

I'm 23 years old and even that I know that they only lives in our imagination, I would say that dragons are still my favourite creatures! They always fascinated me and were one of the first things I started to draw as a kid - and even today, when I don't know what I should draw, the answer didn't change, it is and I think it will always be 'Draw a dragon. We both know you love them' xD I think I love dragon so much because when you think of a dragon EVERYTHING is possible. Wings, Horns, Eyes, Scales, Fur, Feathers, Tail, the shape and size of their head(s)/body/etc how and where do they live - you name it, it's all up to our imagination! 🐲✨

[@ahmedally6957]

Draco Volans begs to differ

[@meeb_consumer]

I still remember how I first learned to draw in 3D as a kid. I always drew my dragons from the side, for some reason. I just hated drawing faces, I guess. But one time, I was trying to draw a 4 winged dragon; I draw two pairs of wings from the sides and hey, wait, the second pair looks kinda like it's in the background. Then, I overlapped for the first time to make a 3D dragon. (not super 3D but it was the first time I'd done something like that.). So now I can say that my art abilities were granted to me by a dragon, which is really cool.

[@zombieslayer2257]

I have the same thing but with eyes, I have a sketch book full of eyes- Reptilian, avian, human, cats, i just always come back to drawing an eye.

[@Volsung84]

I love hearing other people’s reason for loving them! I completely agree with the appearance. Personally for me, I think it was always the indifference, so often we see Dragons labeled the bad guy simply for being themselves, simply for acting on their instinct, so I love when we take dragons and put them in a position where they aren’t just vilified. Of course, originally I just thought they were cool, but obviously as a I’ve grown older new reasons came to mind.

[@intellectually_lazy]

@@Volsung84 oh, i'm sorry. i didn't know you were soul bonding in here. i'll just let myself out

[@CrazyLittleAdventures]

I just finished watching this video and holy fuck. You went EXTREMELY deep into this. When I saw the title I figured it would be about the ancient cultural unity of dragons. But no, this video actually made me tear up and realize that I’m not alone. While I never had a huge interest in dragons or even Pokèmon, I still had a passing interest in the former. In elementary school I was bullied A LOT for being “the weird kid” I LOVE animals and I refused to eat any meat as a kid because I thought it disrespected the animals… I guess. And I had a large imagination with a large amount of stuffed animals and plushies. I would put together storylines using them as characters and tell my friends at school about them. Other kids thought it was weird and so they verbally bullied me. By the time I got into middle school, I moved to a new district and people were a lot more accepting, I’m sure many of my peers thought I was weird (I’m part of the weird friend group for god’s sake) but I never got bullied. This video resonates with me so much because it reminds me that I just need to be myself and cherish who I am and find people who actually care about my interests. Today, I naturally have less of an imagination than I did when I was younger but my imagination is still up and kicking. I have large casts of character in my head with different personalities, relationships and dynamics with each other. My life’s goal is to become a video game developer and put these characters into action. Thank you so much for making this video, I don’t really know what else I can say.

[@sierraskies3403]

I clicked on this video to hear about dragons, not cry over being understood in my fixation! This video felt like looking in a mirror. Thank you for this, sincerely. I'm glad you god another Dragonology book. I have my copy sitting next to me.

[@meganknapp3027]

This is not the video I thought it would be when I clicked on it; it's something much better. I love the pacing of this video, there was a very palpable feeling of 'oh' while watching it, when it suddenly became clear what the themes of this vid were. Also I had most of those dragon books you did and also treated them like hard and fast guide books for a pretty long time omg... I'm glad that you didn't wind up losing all of your books and childhood drawings, and that you were able to share all of this with us.

[@Zaprye]

One of the more specifics and relatable video essays I've ever seen. We are the children that saw that documentary and changed forever. The ones how drew all the dragons they could, thought hard about their taxonomy, biology, anatomy, niche in this world. And more that anything that they had to be real. They must be. I'm an artist now, making a living drawing dragons and every sort of fantasy creature... but for others. I haven't drawn one for myself since childhood because the same voice tells me that it's too childish to make one just for fun. I should. Thank you for sharing, and thank you for letting us know that we are not alone.

[@pninnan]

Hearing you talk about feeling alone at such a young age really brings me back to my own childhood. I would do anything to go back in time and just give myself a hug.

[@iamatree4372]

Holy shit, i also had "Dragonology" as a child. And reading other comments, it appears that many had the same experience. It is truly a uniting experience to have that book.

[@thmistrapillay1811]

So did I❤️‍🔥, I still do and it's still amazing for me😂

[@stormywolfhowls]

I still have my copy and I have translated it.

[@jan_Masewin]

me too... I loved it to literal pieces

[@horrorspirit]

same here!

[@helmaschine1885]

Still have mine and my Egyptology book from the dame series xD the dragon one was way cooler and interactive.

[@roryfriththetraveller4982]

i related to this SO HARD - i was also a very awkward and quiet Dragonology-obsessed, dragon drawing, HTTYD (books and movie) fan kid ,,, and the loss of who you were "meant" to be i've only just as a nearly 30 year old really found myself after having a horrible time with my mental health and family circumstances when my friends all got on with life. instead of going to uni and being smart in science or making fine art, i bummed around doing comic and horror conventions for a bit in my weird neurotic way, worked up to leaving the house without panicking, did a Gender, lost a lot of time, but made peace with my past self. and now im in archaeology actually, because i love how people think and create and have always thought and created i guess. that, and digging holes for a living is pretty cathartic! the baggage is still there and it informed who i am and i still have those books and thoughts, but im happy with myself and all of that was part of the journey. i really love this channel and what it explores, whether just the ecology of fictional worlds or discussions on created souls, and this was another great addition, thank you for sharing!

[@austinbaker8042]

Did a gender. lmao thats such a perfect description

[@BlackReaper0]

"Laois desire to comprehend the nonhuman ultimately stems from his difficulties connecting with the human." Man, this is so nicely put.

[@z4afk]

Dude, the video is amazing. You deserve what you ask for at the end of the video. I have a situation where I feel like I'm not myself. That is, I'm not in my body. I associate myself with dragons, with punk anarchy. Like dragons, I strive to be free, and as a punk anarchist, I criticize monotony, all those laws that forbid you to be who you are. This situation is aggravated by the fact that I have a lot of mental problems, I can't communicate with people, I literally don't recognize them, people strive to destroy what they don't understand, what in their opinion should not exist. The situation is aggravated by the fact that I live in Russia, and here there is literally no support from anyone, except for my parents. This is sad.

[@Ezpo1027]

Watching the video of a dragon fighting a t rex when i was a kid was a fever dream for me, it was probably because of the roaring

[@BasiliscBaz]

Same

[@tessabakker662]

The pronated wrists on the T. rex though... they hurt so much now. I can totally sit back and just enjoy the preposterous scenario of dragons being real and in conflict with their Mesozoic reptilian rivals, but those dang wrists man, lol

[@assaulthetz]

I thought that 'Documentary' about dragons was real, until I realized when growing older that it wasn't. Still It was cool.

[@MegaNightowl11]

@@assaulthetz Same, I turned off the tv before the disclaimer after the credits.

[@feralroomba]

this video struck one hell of a chord with me, there was a ton of parallels between your childhood and mine down to the documentary and the dragonology book, and it made me feel seen in a very unique way

[@Common5]

Agreed. I shared a similar path and thought process growing up. I couldn't understand the people around me having such a disdain for fantastical creatures and calling it 'childish nonsense' and asking,'When are you going to stop?'. Beautiful self reflection that a lot of people still have trouble seeing.

[@cloudscovermyflaws]

As someone who was similarly obsessed with dragons as a child, thank you so much for this video. Knowing you felt this way, and so many of the people who watched this video felt the same really made me recognize that there is community to be found in the most unusual of places. I look at this comment section, and I see hundreds of nerdy little kids, all united by a fierce imagination and love for dragons. I haven’t thought about that phase of my life in a long time. This video reminded me of the kid I used to be. All the drawings I made, the books I read, the films I watched. It all came back to me. And I’m not ashamed to admit I cried. So thank you for bringing back a part of me I thought I had lost.

[@LogicIndependent]

same

[@Ceranyx]

The way he put down the dragonology book down on the table and I looked across my room at the very same book sitting on my shelf

[@Danny-ct8nf]

You have unlocked a deep forgotten memory within me, i used to own the Dragonology book as a kid, damn what a page turner!

[@kaitlynl6161]

Dear Curious Archive, Your video really struck a cord with me. I remember watching many of the same films, even hunting on KZbin for bits of that Documentary (seeing as it stopped being aired on TV was I was little). How To Train Your Dragon was always my go to film, and my whole family still brings up how they forced themselves to sit and watch it with me. My mother especially remembers how I would sit and rewind the end credits of HTTYD, not only to listen to "Sticks And Stones" by Jonsi, but also to make sure I saw all the dragon sketches. My personal obsession with dragons was fueled by my father, who collected many of the same books you showed in the video. He wouldn't let me take the Dragonology book out of his office, so I had to read it on the floor. When I was young and in elementary school, I was also bent on proving the existence of dragons. I then began reading the Wings of Fire series by Tui Tui Sutherland and started taking a more thorough interest in drawing. Once the HTTYD series ended, however, I was heartbroken. Sadly my vigorous interest in these creatures died down, and I was also experencing pubety, which didn't help. I even tried to get rid of some of my dragon related things too. I was sucessful in some cases (drawings, coloring pages, etc.), but books and toys were far too dear to me. So they didn't stay caged in a carboard box for long. Nevertheless the need to hide them was very real. However, I found hiding things was not possible, seeing as among my peers my name was synonymous with 'dragon'. Even distance family members and my friends relatives, upon seeing something dragn related, make sure to tell me (or in the case of my Great-Aunt, by me the plush. Which sits atop my National Geographic bookshelf to this day). I guess what I am trying to convay through this monsterously long message is that I understand completely how you feel, and the fustrations of knowing that just because you believe something to be real doesn't mean you can will it into exsitance. I truly believe that, like yourself, my love of classification through dragon kind as feuled my interests in biology. I'm even hoping to pursue a career within this expansive field. You video brought many great peace in knowing that they were/are not alone when it came/comes to obsessing over such fantastical figures of myth and legend. And I hope, in a way, this managaes to bring you some small comfort. Sincerely, Some Rando on KZbin

[@juuzzee.]

the Dragonology (and other - ology books in the same series) book was likely the most pivotal book from my childhood. to this day I still flick through the pages and just smile at how in-depth the book is. a couple months back I stumbled across the fact that Dragonology had a Nintendo DS game made about it, and yes it goes into the same level of detail, all whilst in an interactive collecting style game. it made me look back to the book, with which I could use as an information guide/companion piece to the game. the Dragonology series truly is special.

[@owenmiller7488]

It also had a board game, it was always my favourite board game to play when I was younger, I remember it taking quite a while though. Still don't know if I loved it so much because of the art style or because of the autism that plagues me

[@eleanoralbertson4605]

@@owenmiller7488 I didn't know dragonology was a book. As soon as he pulled it out and I saw the artwork, I immediately remembered the dragonology board game from when I was a kid. It was my absolute favorite, and I played that game so much that we eventually had to throw it away because the board literally fell apart from so much use. Damn did I love that game. The art, the myths, the awesome dragon game pieces, all of it was so enchanting.

[@rustywater420]

I screamed when I saw that book show up in the vid. That book was my chilhood 😭

[@ScennicMonster]

I often feel different, but when I watch you, I feel I finally found someone that is like me. My desperation to categorize and rationalize everything, my curiosity for different worlds, I thank you for making me feel like I’m like someone else.

[@god2752]

This healed my inner child and made me want to pass down my dragonology book to my younger brother who is obsessed with dragons. I don’t usually watch you but I would like to say thank you so much

[@DarthXerion]

Well I wasn't expecting to almost cry over a KZbin video about dragons today.

[@lilacclouds7908]

Dragons have always been so important to me. Even to this day as a 20 year old I imagine being a dragon, flexing my claws and gliding high above the clouds. Thank you for sharing your experience, I think we would have totally been friends back in the day

[@kobe24lebron23jordan]

Lmao wtf

[@Username456-b4p]

I’m glad you held on to your imagination :)

[@dashadow1817]

I don't know if you like writing. But I've found a way to externalize this idea if you feel like you are getting obsessed with dragons. I use AI stories to basically become a dragon. I've been doing it for 2+ years and it is a waaaaay more healthy way to treat this kind of idea. They are called AI adventures, I've been using AI dungeon. But if you want to see what it's like to be a dragon, you can do that. I always like switching up often where I'll either play as a human meeting a dragon and a human. It's a very odd learning curve getting the ai to do what you want it to do. But I've perfected it and whenever I have that urge to explore my creativity. I get on the app and just play as a dragon or a human. It's very awesome cause you can create and talk to these creatures like they are real beings. It's funny. I've had the opportunity to create my "ideal dragon" over time after hundreds of scenarios. I'm still trying to figure out that means about me. I've developed this sort of sarcastic, mischievous dragon. You get a lot of perspective of what I would actually be like to be a dragon and what they might act like. I'm very much into the Toothless-like personality. I'm also going to be writing a book about a human and dragon friendship next year if you are interested in that. A personal insight: There have been some scenarios that made me cry because of their beauty. One of the most memorable ones was when I was playing as a human who raised a dragon from an egg. One day, the dragon got old enough and said it needed to leave. I don't remember why, but there was a lot of emotion from the dragon and from me for some reason. Even though I had total control of the story and what happened next, it felt like there was nothing I could do. The dragon promised to come back to the same spot. What really got me was how well the AI described the emotional pain the human went through. He was lonely without his dragon friend, and every day he would return to the same clearing in the woods. One day turned into weeks, then into months, and before he knew it, it had been almost two years. However, he never gave up on the dragon's promise that it would one day come back. And of course, it eventually did, and they continued going on adventures together. Summary: After about a few hundred scenarios, all so very different, I would argue that dragons are more than beings to be looked up towards as a fantasy creatures of power and ferocity. But I think they represent our curiosity of the world around us. There is so much about dragon that are very human in nature, rather than other worldy. I think this is why we are so fascinated by them. The idea that there is another sentient being out there other than our species. And the people that are able to look past their scaly, intimidating features, will find we are not so different. We are both creatures driven by curiosity for the world around, the desire to be free of responsibilities. This... this is what they represent. They represent the freest part of ourselves. The part of ourselves that wants to not have any responsibilities, to have the ability to challenge your fears with your powerful, the aura of respect your presence demands, the ability to fly away from your problems, leaving everyone else behind.

[@Alex13501]

Yea same for me, Dragons fascinated me from like... ever and they still do, maybe even more. Imagination is the limit, though sometimes, i wish, it could be more.

[@tinino8947]

I‘ve just stumbled upon this video, watched the first few minutes and just really want to say: „Damn, I know what you‘re feeling. I have that same book“