Cutting the Fat: X-Men Teaches Us That Jokes Are Evil! (Dialogue Writing for Beginners)

A page from X-Men: Years of Future Past One where the writer forgets this is a comic and thinks they're writing a twitter thread. And the subject for today? Jokes are evil and humor can lead to tyranny. #marvelcomics #marvel #xmen
Twitter: / literaturedevil
Twitch: / literaturedevil
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[@RJStheFourthAge]

Bravo, my friend! In writing my own comic I’ve learned, that 1) dialogue (All dialogue) needs to be stripped to the bare minimum and flow with the page, the panel, and the art; and 2) respect for the artist and the letterer needs to curb your desire to write a novel (but I repeat myself). I’m sharing this video.

[@flamestoyershadowkill]

Nice to see you here

[@thebigdawgj]

" In writing my own comic I’ve learned, that 1) dialogue (All dialogue) needs to be stripped to the bare minimum and flow with the page" I've never written a comic and I learned that by looking at the failure that was CTRL+ALT+DEL by Tim "wordswordswords" B^Uckley.

[@kylekight581]

The irony of "you think you're working for the greater good" is the very people writing things like this are those who's defense of every horrific thing they advocate for is "we're on the good side, it's for the greater good!"

[@Saavryn]

"As a rule, don't listen to people who say things like 'the betterment of mankind'. They're, on average, huge assholes." ~Dr. Giuseppe Malocchio

[@dbsommers1]

@@Saavryn Mass graves are the lynchpin of "greater goods". Every one of them was the result of someone else's greater good.

[@OK-yy6qz]

Exactly im certain that the same writer that wrote that shit was up until recently supporting how "unvaccinated conspiracy theorists shouldn't be allowed in public spaces for the greater good"

[@VainerCactus0]

@@OK-yy6qz Most of them said put the jab free into camps as I recall.

[@Binowhy]

@@OK-yy6qz Nothing wrong with that lol you pose a health risk to the community at large if you’re not vaccinated and refuse to wear a mask, sorry bro, but everyone of us was vaccinated for polio and mumps as children as a requirement to go to school so why shouldn’t people be required to receive vaccines for an ongoing pandemic if they want to go into restaurants and shops

[@blackjoker2345]

Even funnier concept when you consider the fact that "dictators hate the sound of laughter" has been common wisdom for a long time. Comedy as an art form is well known as the space where artists can point out flaws in the systems we believe in. It's the space where people who rule by fear lose all their power. It's those places that are most often silenced when a regime with things to hide takes power. Silencing comedy is the first sign a movement is morally bankrupt and unwilling to see it's own flaws.

[@LyaksandraB]

Hilarious how these people keep denouncing the past, but comedy was never as prosecuted in nearly the whole past century as it is nowadays.

[@The_Real_Fomsie]

Well, most SJW types would fall on the side of the dictators, so it is no surprise that they hate humor as well.

[@silent_stalker3687]

@@The_Real_Fomsie imagine extinction rebellion’s reaction finding out the game Destroy All Humans was not a environmentalist game.

[@nelisezpasce]

Literally 1984

[@The_Real_Fomsie]

@@nelisezpasce A lot of them really do seem to be striving for that as an ideal, and not a warning.

[@dragonmouse3985]

This is actually a pretty amazing page: Its a visual expression of mental gymnastics. Complete with twists and knotwork.

[@chadschmaltz9790]

Yep. The writer put in an entire floor routine, uneven bars, and balance beam all on one page.

[@bakedturkeys2132]

It's one hundred percent projection. They want to ascribe this resolute end of thought crime to anyone who takes the piss out of them. It's to protect themselves before hand knowing full well that those they look up to, a.k.a. communists, have actually committed those crimes while suppressing thought crimes themselves, and they know damn well that they would do it to ideological opponents themselves if they had the power. They're just trying to cash in to the bank early so they can do the prep work for future accusations. Their claims are more and more ridiculous every day.

[@badabomb9946]

The unintentional visual metaphor of such an unhinged minutes-long rant literally meandering like a twisty river just to fit on the page is pure gold.

[@sukamadik5983]

Well these people are definitely jokes so that explains why they are so evil.

[@LegacyComics100]

They aren’t jokes, cause jokes have meaning.

[@themesongfan452]

@@LegacyComics100 The joke is that they think they have meaning when they don't.

[@HoodedSpidey]

This page beautifully sums up the death of the western comics industry.

[@humrH2360]

It's the perfect microcosm of everything wrong with modern Western writing: the mainstream isn't interested in making a good story, they're obsessed with spewing lectures and treating the audience like they're stupid.

[@davidfrancisco3502]

The *North American* comic is a corporate zombie. Look at the french bande dessinées and even latin american comics.

[@gasterblaster9817]

@@davidfrancisco3502 North American _AAA_ comics are putrid shells of what they once were, yes, but our indie scene is still going strong, as LD himself has demonstrated with his own published works

[@elpretender1357]

@@davidfrancisco3502 What Latin American Comics?

[@slyngn7847]

I'm starting to think writers like these have never actually talked to another human being face to face before and only write what they think how humans talk to each other.

[@bakedturkeys2132]

They don't talk with other human beings. When they're forced to interact with others they opt for their Disney tween sitcom persona which is a combination of snarky, self absorption, and condensation all played out on a script they wrote in their heads. Holding a dialogue is impossible when all they do is talk "to" or "at" people let alone their habit of talking down to people.

[@insulttothehumanrace3807]

@@bakedturkeys2132 Did you mean "condensation", or "condescension"? Fits these writers either way, merely curious.

[@solalabell9674]

Didn’t know Hayao Miyazaki was on KZbin

[@bakedturkeys2132]

@@insulttothehumanrace3807 didn't catch the typo, thanks. Also I didn't think of that but yes condensation also works to describe their performative monologue aptly.

[@Snooopy28]

@@bakedturkeys2132 Exactly what I was about to say, what those people do with other people, cannot be called an 'interaction' or 'conversation', because both require some level of paying attention to the other party, and they're incapable of that, they always want to talk, to spread their own essence Always OUTPUT OUTPUT OUTPUT, ME ME ME And never any input

[@rookless4121]

Man, as an amateur writer I fall into this so easily. I end up writing whole pages that can get summed up in less than a whole paragraph.

[@chadschmaltz9790]

Not entirely a bad thing for a first or second draft. Proofreading or having someone as an editor to help you identify and remove unnecessary lines is part of writing a good story.

[@MrRobotdragon]

The difference is that you are aiming to get better in writing, while those writers think they are hot sh*t and inspirational, because they believe they are on the "good" side

[@LadyofGreen99]

Hey, we're in the same boat my guy; so long as we keep trying to get better we won't be like these professionals

[@williamstark9568]

Yeah making simple sentences is hard without first going on a bigass ramble for me. Words are hard, guys.

[@OzixiThrill]

Well, to be fair, just because something can be summed up easily doesn't mean that it should be summed up so. Hell, you could summarize many great works of writing in a few sentences, but I think we can all agree that such a summary would lose all value said work held. What really matters is what you're doing with that lengthy piece; You could have a single character monologuing (maybe even to themselves) to show the reader their way of thinking and give that character some depth. You could have a lengthy dialogue between two characters to stress that their disagreement isn't hostile in nature but it's also deep-seated and they are unlikely to ever agree. Again, to stress, having lengthy blocks of text is perfectly fine, so long as you're using them for a goal. This, much like many other pieces of advice from LD has caveats. To summarize - I disagree, and for valid reasons.

[@jackbenimble4903]

Much prefer your rewrite. It’s difficult for writers to butcher their work, but the published comic page felt more like a rambling brainstorm. Jokes are necessary. Comedy is crucial to society. When the Jester is killed, the world knows the King to be a tyrant.

[@thesittingtraveller3467]

"Jokes are necessary. Comedy is crucial to society. When the Jester is killed, *the* *world* *knows* *the* *King* *to* *be* *a* *tyrant.* " Are you sure you know what your wrote?

[@LyaksandraB]

I wonder if it's necessary. I know it's not crucial to basic society, since animals work perfectly without it. Maybe it is to ours, but I doubt it. And no, I'm not defending the cancer that is woke culture, just wondering about the validity of what you said.

[@davidlewis6728]

@@LyaksandraB you must be incredibly naive, or incredibly dense to think comedy isn't necessary to society. all social animals engage in some degree of playfulness and rely on it to form bonds with their peers and learn how they are supposed to act. jokes go a step further by elegantly expressing an underlining truth of something in a way that can be appreciated and digested by others, including those who might be considered the butt of the joke, if it is delivered well. the effects comedy has on communication, philosophy, and child development, nevermind entertainment and mental stability, make it very clear that comedy is necessary for a society as complex as ours to function at all. it is a very negative image when someone tries to criminalize comedy, which is why anyone who does is considered a petty tyrant.

[@the1necromancer]

That is a beautiful line.

[@edenmckinley3472]

@@LyaksandraB I would argue that, while comedy is not crucial to society, it is an inherent part of human nature. We use laughter to forget our problems, process those problems, or in the very least, as a shield to prevent emotional damage. Jokes are the white blood cells of the mind. Without them, there would be many illnesses.

[@tylerkane1063]

"Because a father was taught men are pathetic if they're caregivers"-As no culture in the history of forever(Spartans aside) taught. The historical role of fatherhood has with very few exceptions been the most emotionally intensive and dedicated roles society could give someone. Seriously, I once had a teacher that said, 100% a family member dying wasn't considered a tragedy until the Industrial Revolution. It happened more often, that didn't make it easier on the people that went through it. What have they to gain by acting like love and familial bonds are a 2012 invention anyway? It's super annoying.

[@Idazmi7]

They gain the ability to feel improved over their ancestors.

[@benjaminrogers8875]

Destroy the past to remake the future.

[@tylerkane1063]

@@Idazmi7 Ah, right. Can't have people thinking their ancestors were people now, can we?

[@tylerkane1063]

@@benjaminrogers8875 I suppose so.

[@wojak-sensei6424]

Traditional fatherhood is caregiving. One look at the common fatherless adult would tell you that dads are a lot more important in child development than you'd think. They're not just wagecucks that put money into the household.

[@zerothefaceless4888]

"I can see everyone's eyes go dull as they zone out and stop listening". Fun fact, the guy wasn't talking about the characters, he's talking about the readers.

[@mr.cobalt1668]

The boredom transcended the boundaries of reality and he saw everyone in- and out-of-universe just zone out to him. Even the Watcher has only a vague memory that anything in this moment of time ever existed.

[@PelemusMcSoy]

"If someone hates you, they will come up with a reason after the fact." This writer just exposed their own practices.

[@genxrants]

To be fair, Babylonbee had been complaining that all of their satire articles are coming true. Real life is actually putting them out of business.

[@bestaround3323]

Eh, that site's jokes boil down to, "isn't it crazy that gay people get upset at being demonized" and "woke leftists are mad at cop for not seeing color, only crime". Honestly it feels more mean spirited then simple satire at times. I get it "isn't for me", but it still feels hateful sometimes.

[@genxrants]

@@bestaround3323 This was before the fiasco with the "man of the year" post on twitter (which was I think was retalitory or out of desperation for some form of satire). Before that, it was all satire about politics... things that we would have thought to be crazy in 2019.

[@bestaround3323]

@@genxrants Fair, I still prefer the onion.

[@charlesraccoonington9280]

@@bestaround3323 oh like the onion is any better.

[@bestaround3323]

@@charlesraccoonington9280 The answer is clearly yes.

[@MrCDM6]

Jokes lead to eugenics...? That's not a slippery slope argument, that's walking off a cliff.

[@draketheduelist]

I write _books_ less verbose than this. What gets me about this is the implication that there is no reaction or reflection or even acknowledgment. You could end this whole song and dance with "and... you're not even listening to me anymore, are you?" Were this animated, you'd see a bunch of close-ups on Colossus constantly changing angles, only for Kitty to walk in from the background and comment "wow, you're still going? I took lunch half an hour ago." The fact that this whole rant is set to a static picture suggests that, at best, the whole thing is going in one ear and out the other. More likely, Kitty is a malfunctioning Doombot whose self-destruct sequence fizzled and now it's just standing there. Either way, not the intended takeaway. Back in the Deadpool game, there was a scene of Cable giving a long complicated speech, only for Deadpool to visibly be bored and annoyed to the point where he literally shoots himself in the head to make the boring speech stop. That's what these speeches need: somebody to tale the absolute piss out of them.

[@insulttothehumanrace3807]

And, of course, the parody of this in One Punch Man, where Saitama gets noticeably bored and irritated until he just yells for Genos to get to the point. I know that's more of a parody of lengthy and unnecessary backstories than speeches like this, but the sentiment still fits.

[@wojak-sensei6424]

I've seen SAT short stories that are more engaging than this comic. My senior high thesis partner can make a less amateurish prose.

[@zionleach3001]

Well it would defeat the purpose of the speech. If it ended in a joke.

[@jeremysmith3701]

What the author actually meant was "jokes I don't like" because you can be sure that any joke they approve of, no matter how dark or sinister in its suggestion, is perfectly fine with them as long as it targets the 'right' group of people, because then it's 'just a joke', it's only when jokes are told at the expense of people the author sympathizes with that all of a sudden jokes are harmful.

[@noblecommando4269]

I love line "showing those burdened by hate a better way " it sounds like something captain America or Superman would say.

[@Prich319]

I don't really fancy myself a writer, but even I understand the KISS principle: Keep it Simple Stupid. This principle applies to everything from writing source code to advertising to political messaging. If you're writing a comic panel where there's little to nothing going on, and the word count might as well be an ideological manifesto, then you're doing something wrong.

[@nelisezpasce]

Definitely, the best animators use less keyframes and in-betweens to convey movement, it's all about efficiency.

[@zionleach3001]

They should emphasize the *STUPID* part. I can't find a publisher but these morons get hired?! The worst part is nobody said anything.

[@ONEPEAKFRFR]

I want an x-man story not an x-man lecture.

[@WhyYouMadBoi]

A X-lecture by a X-Man to an X-Audience

[@ulaznar]

X-people you bigot 😝

[@LegacyComics100]

“We should change the name to X-Women, since we do more around here than the boys.” -Cringe someone wrote.

[@dominicansolx]

That simplification process was terrific. It was simple, concise, and well thought out.

[@lunatic0verlord10]

4:57 Probably because they can't see past their own arrogance and hatred. Completely oblivious to the fact that Colossus's speech can apply to them.

[@LyaksandraB]

They don't even know they have arrogance and hatred. And hypocrisy and double standards and bullying and evil and douchebagery and abuse and... you get the idea. "A doctrine insulates the devout not only against the realities around them but also against their own selves. The fanatical believer is not conscious of his envy, malice, pettiness and dishonesty. There is a wall of words between his consciousness and his real self." Eric Hoffer

[@dbsommers1]

"It's different when we do it." Is the caveat they invoke.

[@kiwilord9628]

I wonder how many of these writers even know what an inspirational and heroic person even looks like for them and what a heroic action is to them.

[@tunebeat3809]

I'm starting to these these writers are more like villains that want to justify committing atrocities against innocent people.

[@opadrip]

The comic panel gives me some leftist meme energy

[@zionleach3001]

Well it's a non-indie publisher comic... So it probably is a politics obsessed weirdo.

[@ab-gail]

Wall of text! Wall of text!

[@afasdfasafd314]

wall of text that can be summarized into "joke lead to nazism" yeah, it checks out

[@30alex30clubpenguin]

First it was Joke are violence, to now jokes lead to Eugenics, I wonder what else Jokes can do XD

[@LyaksandraB]

You just ended an entire race of people by making that joke, actually.

[@ShadowWingTronix]

Explains why they hate comedians.

[@ulaznar]

Bring back mustache man from the dead

[@bestaround3323]

Well last I checked in DC there was a killing joke apparently

[@30alex30clubpenguin]

@@ulaznar I still see him, he change his profile pic

[@InkyDustMan]

Honestly, as the second video of Literature Devil's I've seen, I think this is short, but perfect. It points out the flaws in the selected piece of writing, breaks it down to be digestible, and refines it to something that actually works and teaches both the lesson of the original author better than they could themselves, but also teaches a lesson which writers can take away and use in their own work. I struggle to be concise, but this helps me to focus on simplifying in a way I wouldn't otherwise consider.

[@cryptonaut1435]

This twisted mentality surrounding jokes comes from the fact that the people who genuinely view them as such have never actually made a joke in their lives. Any joke they make is something they truly believe, but delivered with a thin layer of false humor, so if they say something egregious and it doesn't go over well, they can claim it was just a joke while identifying those who don't ideologically align with them.

[@bestaround3323]

Listen, I like dead baby jokes as much as the next guy, but that doesn't mean I want to paint my garage with them.

[@howzittoyah]

I mean the whole point of satire is to make a point without drawing blood. Jokes can serve as criticism, and criticism doesn’t really work if it’s not true.

[@cryptonaut1435]

@@howzittoyah I'd argue there's quite a big difference between a genuine satirical performance vs tweeting something like "kill all white men" then claiming it's a joke when people rightfully point out you sound unhinged.

[@louisduarte8763]

3:55 "Let's make this Superhero comic feel more heroic, shall we?" Flawless Victory. Excellent burn on where too many superhero comics, not just the ones that satirize/parody/dump on the others, go wrong.

[@roys.1889]

This is the exact image that made me question if making jokes at all was a good or bad thing. I first saw this when I was like 13? 14? Formative years. I looked at this and wondered if having a laugh at anyone's expense but my own was a bad thing. Fast forward nearly a decade later and now I look at this again and I wonder why I bought into it. I mean I have my own sore points that I don't like to make jokes of myself but usually I try to talk it out before just declaring all jokes to that tune invalidated. Iunno.

[@LyaksandraB]

Just one gripe, the formative years, when you create your "personality" and become "yourself", actually end at about 8 years old. The rest of changes and adjustments only happen on top of that foundation you built as a child. The words in quotations are merely written like that because those things aren't what most people assume.

[@roys.1889]

@@LyaksandraB you know what, fair. I was meaning to say something along the lines of "The years when I started to figure myself out and how I handled myself around other people." but hey.

[@nelisezpasce]

If there are two sides, whichever gets more offended by jokes is the more authoritarian, remember that

[@narnia1233]

Jokes usually contain an element of truth, which is why they’re funny. Life isn’t about being comfortable but about facing truths-even if they’re difficult truths. Difficulties in life really aren’t the end of the world. Bad times come and bad times go. I think for many people, they don’t understand emotionally that no matter what hard times will occur in everyone’s life. But, those really dark times don’t last forever. And in many cases you can actively work to make it better. I think that might be why as you get older you start to realize that jokes aren’t evil. Because telling the truth-even if the truth is difficult-is not evil. Actually, the opposite-lying-is generally a corrupt thing to do.

[@narnia1233]

And I say this as someone who was born with a disability. If that helps you understand. I’ve known ever since I was born that there’s struggles in life. But, even someone like me has realized that having struggles isn’t the end of the world. Eventually you get to a point where you realize this. Where you go, you know what, I’m never going to be able to do this or that-but it’s okay. I’m content with what I have. Plus you also realize that most people don’t really care-basically as long as you’re nice, most people are nice back. Essentially most people don’t mind as much as we think they do. I have hand tremors and I used to try to hide my hands. I’d put my hands in my pockets, wear long sleeves, etc. But, eventually you realize too that others don’t really pay that much attention or mind. Basically you get to a point where you meet someone who has a different condition and if you think about how you thought about that person then you realize you didn’t pay much attention. And then you realize most people too think the same way. Anyways, eventually you accept life and you are at peace. And when you get to that point-where you face the truth and are at peace with it, then when someone points out this truth you just acknowledge it and it doesn’t bother you.

[@truthblade01]

Just listening to all of that "dialogue" is melting my brain...

[@Dr_Crow_Carnival]

That number of speech bubbles should be an OSHA violation.

[@AmericanCaesarian]

4:42 I love how it’s now a divine message, instead of being propagandist bullshit

[@cartershow6349]

To quote the movie Sausage Party, "You can't just slam their beliefs, you have to show them that there's a better way. You need to inspire them like you inspired me. You need to give them hope." This is honestly one of my favorite quotes and I think it's one all storytellers who want to teach a lesson in this way should live by.

[@SirFailsalot91]

This whole word salad bar can be summarised with just one or two speech bubbles, something like "It's always a joke until somebody says it about you, and they mean it." That's it, that's all you needed to say about it in order to get the point across, and it would have saved so much ink compared to printing a conga line of speech bubbles with nothing else but one picture on a boring white page.

[@dbsommers1]

Jokes are awful unless you mock the "right kind" of people.

[@ThreadBareHope1234]

Firstly: this writer shouldn't take a sick joke so seriously that they're making s*** up (or recalling a Tweet) about the people that say "They shouldn't have kids." Secondly: If it is such a big deal, (I know it's a big deal), then why don't they raise awareness about it by examining it? Challenge everyone's perception of good parenting so we can have these discussions and fix it.

[@jaystrickland4151]

I think the problem the writer runs into is any discussion into this monologue would make it clear this is a massive slippery slope fallacy and the correlation between a joke at the expense of terrible parents is not a call for eugenics nor is it likely to lead to eugenics.

[@ThreadBareHope1234]

@@jaystrickland4151 That's right.

[@jessiemchummigbird1493]

That’s Brian Michael bendis right there

[@jackmars931]

People should have to get a license to get their writing published.

[@savagex378]

"Brevity is the soul of wit" Marvel: I don't get it Me: That is why you fail

[@jothecocopop]

This is such a great and informative series - keep up the great work, LD!

[@jordanhunter3375]

Do I even want to know what the joke was that brought around Colossus's triade?

[@dirus3142]

All that proper virtuous mansplaning to Kitty.

[@maliceflare]

the current writers of western comic media cannot write heroic due to being villains...

[@davidfrancisco3502]

Look at the french bande dessinées and latin american comic books.

[@madbrosheo1514]

I seriously can’t believe that one page has that many speech bubbles in it.

[@darthbiscuit]

I do love the idea that it is possible to save everyone. It's something an absolute good person would believe, and if superpowered, would feel responsible for. This concept would also be quite alien to someone who does not understand absolute good, ie Marvel comic writers.

[@operativeg9493]

I do not know how the writer doesn’t realize how hypocritical they’re being, moralizing about joking. Very “we need to end and attack people that tell the wrong jokes or else there will be eugenics!” Like…

[@greyfox6786]

As usual, your videos carry me through my writing. Love your work.

[@pathfindersavant3988]

THe real problem with this whole spiel from X-men is that these writers and activists are behaving in the exact same way that Colossus is warning about, and they all lack the self awareness to realize that they're warning against their own reflection.

[@ydin9]

As someone who worked a small stint in this industry decades ago before giving up, seeing that panel with the word salad written into it, i can say there are no comic book artists working at Marvel anymore. Not a single one. Everyone is pretending they are cartoonist or artists but what they in fact are are soap box preachers who imitate comics. They don't even know a artist, you can tell because they'd be friends with one they'd slap the taste out of their mouths for showing a even a sketch of this atrocity that fights against everything ever taught about comics and visual storytelling.

[@chadschmaltz9790]

Why do the speech bubbles wind back and forth like a Candyland game board?

[@rolkflameraven1483]

I'm sure there was a rule at some point that if you have even half that many word bubbles on the page without any action you do not do it! Holy crap, did they forget that comic books are a visual medium?

[@claytoncardoso4538]

I think it's consistent, after all we know that Colossus lived a long time in the USSR.

[@TwoSevenX]

The best part is this is exactly the escalation used on social media to justify pretty much anything.

[@apollolux]

A related axiom I learned early on when I wanted to come up with stories and such for games and novels once I learned what it meant and I particularly enjoy partly for its irony: Eschew obfuscation.

[@PhantomationTV]

The irony of a *COMIC* book writer legitimately making one of the characters stand *AGAINST COMEDY* is astounding to me.

[@graywind3277]

Without any actual merit to offer, their most valuable asset is conforming to the narrative they manufacture, so by enforcing ideals that preclude excellence in writing they're just protecting their jobs.

[@Samppaol1987]

Thought process of people we never should have let have even the smallest crumb of power

[@CharlesChaldea]

That was an intellectually dense six minutes and I imagine I'll be coming back to it now and then in the hopes of gleaning nuggets of wisdom from the insightful mass, merci beaucoup

[@terracannon876]

Aren't they explaining in this long tirade how they came to believe that jokes are evil? As in, they themselves fell down the slippery slope and this is how they did it?

[@angelhurtado55]

what the fuck? am glad I missed the x-men in the las 4 years

[@sorawisteria5850]

I will never, ever write this many words in a comic (let alone a single comic page) in my life. Or any life. I like to show not tell since I'm an artist.

[@reigtrain]

Okay just started watching ang now I'm questioning if that a comic page or an essay with pictures.

[@alericfox501]

That speech is so bad I did not think a professional writer actually wrote that. I had to do some research to verify, and it is real. I am almost stunned that someone would write that without any irony. Brilliant video as always, and I look forward to watching more of them.

[@3liq868]

The only thing I was able to say after you gave the new line was THE MENACE

[@visual_Memories]

"When jokes go too far. A thread:"

[@stephenlarson9422]

i still love the "4 or 5 moments" speech from Deadpool for just how well it fits the heroic ideal.

[@BKPrice]

"It starts as a joke." And ends as a joke, for sane people.

[@darktenor4967]

I'm sort of confused on the hole through line here. going from: This one bad parent I see shouldn't be a parent. To: "the government should have complete control over all human reproduction." It's not so much a slippery slope, as a step off a cliff. I might as well claim that complaining about someone's badly parked car is endorsing a nation wide travel ban where anyone court walking the streets without a corret permet is shot on site! while I appreciate the dialogue fix on a literary level, I just can't get over the offenses committed against the practice of ethics here!

[@gunmetalsakura]

I stopped listening to Colossus halfway through is speech and started picturing him with very stubby legs instead of kneeling.

[@austin9568AuraMasterDX]

"Words. Everywhere." -Deadpool

[@leandersearle5094]

Ah f*ck... That dialogue is still skinnier than the author.

[@ravioli_826]

The way I’m writing my own comic, each panel is only gonna have maybe a line or two, up to maybe a paragraph of dialogue at most. If I’m gonna have a character speak for an extended period of time, it’s gonna be spread out through multiple panels with different angles and expressions.

[@Zero-ry2rc]

I remember when Hitler was a struggling stand up comedian. You didn't know if you should laugh or be concerned

[@bestaround3323]

Was that before or after his art phase? Either way I am sure listening to it would be my struggle.

[@Zero-ry2rc]

@@bestaround3323 he claimed to have millions of fans, but I don't think there was more 250k

[@memk]

Poor literature education causes them to be unable to even write a proper propaganda now. What a sad we are in.

[@osogitzgraymane72]

The shear amount of irony that comes from the novel that is this page. His journey of a text's secondary point isn't wrong but the point belongs to a vorpal blade. One, no doubtably, the writer probably thinks is one sided.

[@insulttothehumanrace3807]

Speaking even as someone who tends to write lengthy comments, this is just sad to see. This is a comic, a visual medium. If you must have this lecture (though I cannot fathom why anyone would even want this to exist, let alone be in a comic book), then space it out across several panels. Have some of it be in narration boxes, with background visuals showing the events that are being described; and the last couple panels can be back to Colossus talking to Kitty and her reaction to all this. That would certainly drive the point in more effectively. Someone needs to tell these writers that "a picture is worth a thousand words" is not a challenge to actually see if you can replace drawings and pictures with a verbal deluge.

[@DannySmith-]

Some of what you said at the beginning was a little confusing for me, but I was with you all the way on the rewrite. Basically I was lost in the startup but the conclusion was solid. Heros should be heroic.

[@kalaherty]

Remember kids, don't laugh along with people we have deemed bad, after laughter, there is compassion, sometimes sympathy and the chance to see their humanity, and this is something that we should not give to das untermen---- oh... crap... nevermind.

[@klulu-kun]

That kind of thought bubble just looks like one long joke, to be honest. Like a deliberate parody. Because who rambles like that in a comic?

[@DTylerFultzVA]

Wow, that's a lot of words. Too bad I'm not readin' 'em.😎

[@TechNinjaSigma]

Holy moly, that page! 📃

[@daeryk6424]

Holy shit, that one page of dialog diarrhea.

[@multidinero]

From an editorial standpoint, you’re totally correct that it can be shortened. However, from the standpoint of Colossus as a character, you miss the point. Colossus is a quiet giant. He’s a classic man of few words. Yet, he’s lived under tyranny that Americans would find comically insane. The things that happened to people under this particular totalitarian regime are unimaginable. Even now we see things we, as Americans, would find unbelievable now being floated as necessary and agreeable to accept. We see a set of the population clapping for a “strongman” coming to power. The thing most would find as a joke nearly came to be in our own society. Yet, Colossus saw such a thing from childhood, fictionally speaking. It’s one of the few things you will get an impassioned response from him about. And that’s what makes the word salad he spews make sense for the character, even it’s an editor’s nightmare. Again, I agree with the editorial take. However, you sacrifice the character in that process.

[@Reishadowen]

It's amazing that this comic's editor didn't take one look at that page, and then proceed the smack the artist across the face with it. Then again, it seems most competent editors in this country have long since been fired or forced to quit in disgust.

[@Michael_1138]

Love the work, LitDev, keep up the good work. I pay attention to your channel for the writing advice, and I love these Cutting the Fat vids!

[@durnanironknuckles1617]

To think that Robin Gibb "Started a Joke, that started the whole world laughing...Ho no the joke was upon him"

[@mitchellalexander9162]

You know a long time ago I fought this giant Joker Robot in a Video Game and thought: 'Hey! That looks like a sentinel!' And then I came up with this surreal idea of a 'Joker Sentinel Force' that's entire Directive is to Hunt Down Mutants and Murder them in Comedically horrifying ways.

[@revpembroke3082]

It's so weird hearing you drop the name Heather Antos, the big sister of a friend of mine from high school.

[@IGeorge94]

Jokes = Eugenics? Odd, equation there.

[@heart04winds19]

As much as I am all for jokes the comic does have a point, we probobly thought that jokes about unhinged and terminally online feminists where funny and now we can't get rid of them and they have the unchecked power to end careers with a single tweet... moral of the story is be careful what you joke about weather it be a joke about how Jeff Bezos is going to one day Crack his skull open atemping to swim in a pool of gold coins like Scrooge McDuck or Elon Musk buying all of Twitter and making it a place that is actually tolerable with fair rules and no shadow bans... or better yet yeet it into the sun because it's unsalvageable

[@wojak-sensei6424]

That's not a word balloon. That's a word snake.

[@dwarvernbard9782]

Feels like this author doesn't understand that humor is our way of dealing with the darker sides of humanity, and to keep it in the collective consciousness instead of deny the darkness exsist

[@Calyde]

Great stuff as always LD! I struggle to stay concise in my writing, so it’s great to see an example of cutting down the excess, even though the “excess” in this one was just glorified propaganda. xD

[@kamerondonaldson5976]

can we at least specify that there are absolutely no exceptions no matter how heinous the target of the hate?

[@MaikeruX989]

Hey, do Atlas Shrugged next! She refused to have an editor…….and it shows!

[@YophiGames]

5:03 This video is sponsored by…MEEEEee. So “Agent Smith” esque 😊

[@ardianrarang4256]

Will there be an audiobook of doctor alpha available on audible?

[@Tiberon674]

Tyrants, dictators and narcissists hate jokes and the sound of laughter. Because every joke is about them.

[@JoshuaKevinPerry]

It would be pretty funny if jokes lead to eugenics.

[@Para0234]

If you target laughter, it's because you can't suffer a contradiction. By the way, is there another way to get Dr Alpha 1 without going through Amazon? I'd like to avoid it.

[@pajamapantsjack5874]

No backgrounds and far far too much dialogue. The exact opposite I want from a comic.

[@DD8842]

Oy devilman, now long till more dr alpha?