Dating Men Over 40

[@michaelalexander3927]

A lot of men in their 40's have been ruined by divorce. This is why they aren't willing to take the same risks again.

[@LexRuger718]

Michael Alexander 💥You speak the truth

[@Dayosonic]

Its not risky just do a prenups and u will be good how about that? or date a woman that is more richer than you thats what ill do lol their are many ways to skin a cat lol its not the black women its the system designed to break marriages ... or date from Africa where they not brainwashed by American system....

[@martindales3114]

Pre-nups can be undone by courts. www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3634949/Victory-hippy-millionaire-s-unemployed-ex-wife-wins-500-000-share-fortune-money-decade-broke-up.html And when courts do things like that, men then wake up and say no thank you.

[@carloswashingtonsr5883]

Michael Alexander, that's the realest thang I've heard all week!

[@carloswashingtonsr5883]

I think black women are brain washed to diss like the black man they say they love us but all they want to take from you and not give anything but ass and that's not enough infact that's nothing we have body parts that they need and like too(even swap ain't no swindle..?)

[@captaineveryman6589]

So, to sum it all up, you're saying men in their 40's are smarter and wiser than men in their 20's and more difficult to manipulate. Yes, experience and pain tend to do that.

[@goodlife2322]

Captain Everyman very well said

[@banimyahawadah8062]

Captain Everyman indeed brother. I couldn't agree with you more.. pushing 40 myself..

[@beach_boy1141]

Fatcs💯💯💯💯💯

[@thespadestable]

The more Black women call themselves exposing Black men, the more they expose themselves.

[@02271977ken]

Captain I wanted to say something about what Teneice said but you said it perfectly thank you so much brother.

[@robertjohnson4401]

From a guy over 40. You women don't get it. Your attitude is it is all about you. You deserve a man's dedication and lifelong committment because you happen to have a vagina. What do you bring to a relationship? Are you warm, caring, empathetic, intuitive, open, respectful, emotionally stable, loving, giving, etc.? Respectful is a big one. We can no longer take abuse at this age. Unlike in our 20s when you said it was "easier", we now have some expectations of you. What do you bring to our life? It is also different now due to the change in society in what divorce had been well publicized to have done to men. Look inward now and take stock of what you can offer to a man. Your best chance for a relationship is to show the man that you are worth his dedication. Your next video should showcase what you can offer a man in a relationship.

[@derekscarrsr2688]

Robert Johnson brotha you speak truth I tell women this often they give me excuses or a blank stare.

[@deltaskyhawk]

Robert .... women are so disrespectful to men these days. I hear it and see it everywhere. I sometimes feel like going up to the man and ask him how does he stand for that crap? However the men have been so emotionally abused by women that the men have become numb to it. Like the horse that has been beaten so often, it doesn't even notice it.

[@johnnyhuggins2520]

Men are learning to stop being open to attack &losing it all but women never play from a losing it sacrificing it all position by throw men under the bus & use shaming language &socially ostracized men &call them selfish for protecting their self interest.

[@FrigidWhisper]

Exactly Robert! I am 42 and I have a good job, no kids, haven't been married and no debt. I do not put up with stuff I use to when I was in my 20's. Not in a rush to date women until I get to know them for several months. Then I still side eyeing these chicks. Most of the things you said, is what I look for, but these women are still acting like they are in their 20's.

[@user-ky6jw2yt2h]

ScarcityPrinciple I agree with you 100% bro. I'm 42 no kids all ducks in a row. Most of these sistas are overweight with kids, greyhound baggage and expect top shelf brothas

[@MoCityBeau]

men got to much to lose fooling with the wrong broad

[@wosenaolivier-smith7730]

Mo City Beau, I definitely agree with you

[@devohnmitchell]

the older you get the less you are willing to take chances on the wrong person. No rush. to many people out there rushing shit. Dating doesn't mean having sex. S e x just complicates things.

[@peopleas1healingtrauma]

So true

[@cedricwillis7232]

I'm a man that just turned 40 and I thought that I was stuck in my ways until I met the right woman. Trust me, we may seem like we a complicated but that's just because a perfect match haven't been made just. Keep trying and just be yourself.

[@ingwis]

Finally, a response from a man who isn't a bitter, woman-hating emotional accountant! You sound awesome.

[@mariancounsellor]

Thank you for keeping it honest and simple 👏🏽👏🏽

[@jdubincali]

Over the years, I have realized that who you marry is the single most important life decision a person makes--nothing comes even close. Your partner can and will make or break you in every sense of the word. CHOOSE WISELY.

[@hectorcarrillo6955]

I believe that to be true sir

[@peopleas1healingtrauma]

Facts

[@douglasnyenke2505]

marriage is not a win for men

[@captaineveryman6589]

Dougs2fresh generally you're correct.

[@thespadestable]

@Capain Everyman - Nah, he's more than generally, because now you have a segment of the White female population who ended up earning more than their ex-husbands who are trying to have child support and alimony laws changed, because they don't like watching a lot of their pay being taken away. The same gripes and accusations men have about ex-wives gouging them, is mirrored to the "T" by those women. And yes, the word "unfair" and the phrase, "I feel" is mentioned a lot during their complaint.

[@Angelamar819]

Dougs2fresh for women either.

[@thespadestable]

@Angela Simmons - Women don't see the need for marriage, because they can rely on a handful of other people. Those people are, (1) the parents, namely their mama, (2) their children, (3) their siblings, (4) grandparent, depending on their age, (5) the government, (6) friends, (7) others. Women are not independent by a long shot, at best they can be defined as being dependently-independent. So with so many avenues for women to fall back on, the last thing many want to do is be in a marriage where they have to vote trade with another person. Vote trading is anti-autonomous. Autonomous mindset is all too common within women.

[@nigtau2715]

Definitely not!

[@kamilahlena]

If you have to go through a lot of bullshit to love someone then, he is not the one. Keep it moving.

[@TheMan-je5xq]

Well I just turned 34 myself and I don't feel like wasting anytime dating anymore cause I feel like I'm always being put through a screening process even after a relationship starts and I feel like I'm on a tight rope and the tight rope never ends. I'm already thinking about how whether a marriage benefits me and have taken love and romance out of the equation cause I don't wanna be hurt anymore. I've been called a creep just for talking to a woman I wasn't even trying to date, been told to meet someone somewhere then she pretended to not know me. I've been made fun of for all the positive things about me and have had my time deliberately wasted. Women that don't have kids don't have any time for me so how would a woman who does have kids have time for me. I've been told I wouldn't stand up to a woman and have no spine(couldn't be further from the truth I just pick my fights). I've been told I am poor because I didn't pay the full price for a date(it actually wasn't a date it was just three people hanging out talking and one of them may have liked me I'm not paying for her if she doesn't like me cause I'll come on too strong). Women on Facebook have blocked me just for trying to chat with them not in a romantic way just chatting so I'm tired of all the arrogance, lies, expectations, and general coldness that's out there so I'm just done and doing whatever I wanna do

[@LeadersEatLast]

The Man 316 Excellent Elegy My Enlightened Brother. We Are The Same Age & I Feel The Exact Same Way. Live Your Life King.👑

[@youdontknowmyname8835]

The Man 316, I'm sorry you have had such a bad experience with dating, you seem to be a genuine person

[@lovelyday5773]

Welcome to the 21st century. Social media has RUINED dating. I'm 35 also and married and I went through so much BS before I settled down. People hide behind the internet and are a totally different person in real life. Social media has become a fantasy world for people to catfish and lie and take advantage of others. I just hate to hear people loose faith and rather be single than date and find someone, even as just a life partner without a piece of paper behind it; dont give up. I hope you find someone to share life with.😁

[@BnaiHaShem]

Bro, focus on your purpose in this life. Open your own business, or rise to the top of your business. Disregard the approval of women for a long while. Also hit the gym at least 3 times per week without focusing on women. Make yourself a better person, not for a woman, but for yourself. When you do so, women will flock to you.

[@rushfan9thcmd]

Its a simple equation. The Benefits are not greater than the BS.

[@x8263]

I'm 41 , and this is how I see things at this point. I want to just relax, and enjoy what i have. To me women will never be able to reach this. Women always want more, always looking for how to make the perfect situation for themselves. Women always need more, and at some point I think a lot of guys mature and say enough of the B.S " I have enough, and I'm going to start living my way " This is where I think a lot of older guys are coming from. I think the majority of Women just can never be happy with what they have; I think that is just in there nature.

[@derekscarrsr2688]

Thomas Anderson I agree I'm there now.

[@banditobrowna2563]

Church! Adam wanted Eve...Eve wanted the apple! Think about it!

[@captcindy]

Bob Builder, eve wanted adam. she killed herself because she couldn't take being without him. god brought her back to life. read and don't just listen.

[@swaggalicious3609]

captcindy wea did u her tht version???

[@captcindy]

swaggalicious3609. the books that were taken out for fear of the people having too much knowledge. book of Enoch. grab it, read it and expand your mind. adam killed himself too. he didn't just say, we gotta leave? ok. there you will learn that it was no apple, it was knowledge. that eve got from the messenger.

[@reggieeverett90]

She's spot on. I'm a 51 yr old man. Just let me tell u, it gets worse for u as the man ages. I would like to get married again someday but the requirements are such that I truly believe it won't happen. Am I upset about it? NO, and here's why. I'M HAPPY!!!! I'm in a financial position that allows me not to stress out. I've been there done that. Most of my marriage I was happy but she never seemed satisfied. I don't have to please anybody. I don't mind being alone and when I do want company, I have a smorgasbord of women to choose from. I help them out they help me out were both happy. I don't deal with their issues and they don't deal with mine. Which makes a very peaceful exsitance.

[@tralito4357]

Happiness whole lot of loving without the stress.

[@alphabanks]

Reggie I think you are on to something I am 42 all I really need is a friend with benefits situation.

[@phineashenshaw]

Being alone has been my sacrifice for peace!

[@rogerthornhill1491]

Reggie Everett - Gold. Don't take your peace and happiness for granted for a second!

[@peopleas1healingtrauma]

I agree

[@rubychew2419]

These older men have been through a lot of games when they were younger and they don't want to go through that again. They date only to have some fun.

[@derekscarrsr2688]

Ruby Chew I've got news for you the games don't stop.

[@marvinmckinley6220]

Ruby Chew I got news for you I'm 57 was married for 20 years haven't dated in 6 years and I'm having the time of my life don't drink smoke or get high and im not on any medication I have the same energy I had at 25 I'm running from women my age life is great thank God

[@peopleas1healingtrauma]

@@marvinmckinley6220 lmao

[@peopleas1healingtrauma]

@@derekscarrsr2688 lmao

[@MansSuperPower]

Yes, yes, and yeeeeeessssss!

[@dewdrop4330]

I’m a 45 y/o woman who wants marriage. I found a 45 y/o man who wants marriage as well. We both sought out what we wanted. Look for what you want. Go for that. Don’t go for something different and try to change them or their mind. Wast of time. Go for what you want, period. There are all kinds of people out there. Not just one type.

[@ingwis]

Hallelujah sister!

[@lisaariottiart]

So simple - so true

[@gordongekko2781]

Sexual Market Value flips for most people around 35-40. Young attractive women have the advantage in their teens and twenties, but successful single men have the advantage over 40.

[@The_torero]

Not anymore. That's why so many older men are ''going their own way''. These guys have pretty much been put out to pasture by women but their egos won't allow them to admit it.

[@timcoker4685]

I'm Sure he means LATE TEENS&EARLY TWENTIES>18-24 after 25 it's down hill fast for most women!!

[@lifeiswhatyoumakeit5505]

SMV flips at 27, so sweet when the tables turn.

[@lovefunkrockmusic]

Solitary Man As long as you work out too.

[@ingwis]

@@lifeiswhatyoumakeit5505 You seem bitter and sad.

[@nosimpin]

the only reason a man should marry is to have children and leave a legacy other than that what is the benefit of marriage to a man?

[@TheGamerz_Hub]

kenneth kandahar the same goes for women

[@nosimpin]

Johnna Dunston yeah OK hilarious

[@jossphrichardson8064]

kenneth kandahar I agee...there are no benefits in marriage for a man

[@jab7168]

No dumb ass, the woman hits the lottery in divorce court, that is one of the main reasons they get married along with having a baby.

[@ingwis]

@@jossphrichardson8064 In this cold cost-benefit mindframe, what the f do you think a woman gets out of marriage that men don't, providing she's financially independent (as most women are unless there's an agreement she stays home to care for the kids)? More often than not, the woman takes on all the additional labour of another person's cleaning, cooking and laundry, not to mention emotional labour, and after doing all that being expected to be a sex slave for disappointing lovers. No thanks

[@quentinteal2576]

Looking to settle down does not mean we are open to your 'Turn up' mentality and dealing with your many children who you can not control. Yet women expect you to be tolerate of their issues. By this time we are settled and comfortable in our lifestyle.

[@derekscarrsr2688]

Quentin Teal hell yah.

[@derrickwells3015]

Quentin Teal preach my brother

[@lewiscollins1045]

Bang on......

[@cleopatrawf]

Gosh man not all of us women r like that 🙄

[@ingwis]

Settled and comfortable, mmm so sexy oh yeahhhh

[@daniellem578]

I just started seeing a man who’s 44 and I’m 34. I really enjoy his company. However. I don’t know if he wants to settle down. He keeps saying he wants to continue getting to know me before we make it official. I understand. But I wonder how much time he’ll need. I guess at my age it’s like either we do this or not. I don’t have kids yet either and hope to one day.

[@dollyjay9789]

I lost my husband September 2016 in a car accident. I'm 35yrs, with 2 kids. I need a faithful male friend I can always talk with. I'm a Nigerian.

[@jaydubblupdbsproductions7985]

I'm a man in my forties good carrier.grown kids and single.and cool with being single.no headaches..no drama.and a variety of woman.if right one come along I will settle down.don't matter what age she is.real talk

[@mariadete6284]

plz add me wish to be your friend

[@Angelamar819]

Its a Hot mess. Still play games after 40 dude really

[@diogofarias1822]

Try date women and let me know what you think

[@josephinedonnelley5866]

I find that older men have a lifestyle that they do not want to give up or is hard for them to compromise a bit.

[@clarencebrowniii4750]

Josephine Donnelley why should older men compromise, the juice isn’t worth the squeeze.

[@larryholloway5430]

By "a bit" you mean habd over your balls!!!! lol

[@blackmegriffin9240]

Josephine Donnelley yup because they become TOO ENTITLED as Males who have made EASY money off the strength of Simply being - Male! If he was a woman he'd have it 10x as worse so his attitude alone is why I leave him be. I want a man who respects women struggle to be LEGIT and work hard but finding that in a man who hasn't been catered and pampered too like a big child is hard. Especially since they are used to throwing money at weak females who don't want to be or aspire to be anything else. I need more and these old males are like women now no thank you. I know my worth and it ain't dollars and cents. Turned many old males down because of their entitled attitude I don't take that shit from females I don't take it from males

[@ingwis]

@@blackmegriffin9240 This is what I'm worried about - falling for a man who got used to a woman catering to him, cooking, cleaning, raising his children for him, wiping his ass....I've never been in a relationship like that and never want to be. We can negotiate tasks and stuff, but I'm not gonna be solely responsible for a house that belongs to both of us...And I'm gonna keep working a job. I f we're both working, then we SHARE domestic tasks. Pick up your own damn shitstained underwear lol

[@bobsuruncle2088]

I get the feeling you're dating older men because you expect them to worship you. Just because you're young and good looking doesn't mean they owe you something you know?!

[@peopleas1healingtrauma]

Lmao

[@Blaakheart88-87]

Good looking is a bit of a stretch

[@fabstouchcosmetics3191]

What makes you think that ?

[@goat7844]

What are you really talking about? You were married before. That man got your best years,early 20’s. You now have kids. You really think a man is going to rush into a serious relationship with you? There are to many potential problems. More cons than pros.

[@5822huron]

Goat78 amen

[@ingwis]

What if you don't have kids?

[@peopleas1healingtrauma]

😂😂😂😄

[@wiseman6723]

Is this Kevin samuels?

[@geraldcartersr7615]

I do not usually respond to videos however, I must respond. First I must let you know I am a man in that age group. I have been divorced for a few years. I am responsible and secure in all ways. With that being said all of my kids are grown. So life is really good for me. I work hard but I play hard. Life experience teaches you things I will share one simple thing with you. I absolutely hate having multiple bottles of shampoo conditioner body wash face wash foot wash and other body parts the have special washes "summers eve" in my shower. I cannot even tell you how foolish I think all of those products are. When I was married every time I got in the shower I had to battle all of those bottles. Of course to accommodate all of her stuff my bottle was under the sink. I think it looks horrible and mold forms. I swore to myself if I ever got out of that marriage I would never have a bathroom like that again. 90% of all women that I would consider to date when I go to their house and I look in their bathroom it is already a problem. Now some men are probably finding humor in this. However I realize who I am and what I want. Yes I am willing to compromise and I have several options for her. Yes they require a little bit of work. However I refuse to be unhappy where I live ever again. What you are experiencing is a man who has been through circumstance and situations that beat him down mentally and emotionally. When I met my ex wife in college she had one bottle of shampoo 1 bottle of conditioner. We were using bars of soap back then. When we had our 1st apartment we shared the bar soap and the same shampoo. It was very easy no mess quick clean up. Being a military man who likes cleanliness and order I will never settle for that again. So yes instead of wasting your time I can learn a lot about a person and not waste our time. I will make it very short and sweet when we were younger we wanted love. We understand now that a relationship takes so much more than love. So as an older wiser mature man I am looking for compatibility. Because if we can are compatible and friendly with a little faith and sexuality we will have a great life together. But if we do not have those components the relationship will never be what it needs to be. I am going to say I hope you find your compatible friend that is sexy to you who you will desire to spend time with and enjoy learning about, while teaching him about you.

[@mikewhiteford5901]

Late to the party, what exactly do you bring to the table to share or negate the risk?

[@davidschwartz2144]

Tubbs 427 a history of serial dating, looking to win the marriage lottery

[@aaronporter6821]

I'm 53 love the energy of a young woman I've done well for myself I have to be careful

[@blackmegriffin9240]

Aaron Porter you've only done well because you are a male. Men look out for and help other men show me a man who cares about a woman WITHOUT fuckin her I'll wait...... Crickets. So take your privileged bratty entitled ass elsewhere because other than money you have nothing to offer a Real Woman looking to be inspired. You're a just an old trick boo nothing new

[@Welcometomylife2441]

Black MEGriffin damn! Who hurt you?

[@peopleas1healingtrauma]

Lordt

[@stpatrickcentre7694]

In single Lady need aman to settle with

[@fabstouchcosmetics3191]

Hahaha

[@kelliwoo1979]

OMG...Im having the same conversations with my girls. I typed in "dating men over 40" and your video popped up. Thanks for sharing your experience. Good luck!

[@scottyboomboom8803]

Kelli Woo

[@Malik-nw3fb]

You've hit the wall & still feel entitled get over yourself. Marriage is a set up why bother ?

[@ingwis]

Men also hit a wall btw. We don't confine it to age as we do with women, but you definitely hit a wall when you get so bitter as to write this kind of comment on a KZbin video...

[@peopleas1healingtrauma]

Lmao

[@diogofarias1822]

@To the point. When people can't have kids anymore

[@heatherroberson7629]

Older men do heavy duty pre-screening most of the time because they have done been had by an ex wife. You cannot blame them for this. Many women do the same thing. I am 35 and my husband is 12 years older than me and that is how I like my men. Good conversation, good in bed, good cook, respects me. I, in turn, treat him like he deserves to be treated. He treats me like a queen and I, in turn, treat him like a king. Small things matter - can i get you a glass of tea, let me make your plate for you. It is not that I think I have to do that as a wife, but I want to. And I have been married 3 times. (Divorced, widowed, currently married). Each marriage was different and while my first and I divorced, we get along fine and have a daughter together. We work out visits and child support without a court telling us what to do and that respect is something that was started in our marriage.

[@josephBC3652]

Heather Dowling hello my beautiful black queen how are you doing today you see we need more beautiful respectful women like you in this world you don't always have to bring the white man into your business and that's why your ex husband your first one respect and love you till this day

[@heatherroberson7629]

Joseph, that was a very nice compliment, but it made me laugh a little because I am white. My ex and I were separated 5 years before legally divorcing so visitation and child support had long been established without us being told how to work it out. He is actually ordered to pay more than what we had agreed on, but we stick to what we agreed on. I am not trying to break him. Also, it is more important to me that he is in her life. He helps with activities she does and things like that. If I need anything, all I have to do is call him. Hope you have a good woman in your life as well. I love going home to my husband and that is a great feeling!

[@peopleas1healingtrauma]

Aw lol

[@meshahislegacy5327]

LoL. second wind of bull shit. These dudes aren't too much different from us in the sense that they ain't trying to get hurt, waste their time and potentially lose everything thing they didn't lose from the last marriage.

[@TeneiceTV]

+Mesha Hairston Fair enough but it absolutely doesn't take more than 6+ months to determine if you vibe with someone enough to progress. Chemistry and relationship logistics show themselves pretty early on.

[@Achinezole]

Doo уyyou knоw what YOUR maaaan is thinking? twitter.com/ebc44ac1da3c839ff/status/804693412402241537 Daаating Mеeen Ovеr 40

[@rauldominguez4122]

Do you even consider the posibility that men want to enjoy the relation for as long as they can without commiting to a woman. They'll extended it for years if possible. Unless he wants to get a child, there is no reason for men to commit to women. They don't care if you waste your time or youth on them. Men aged like old wine, women like milk. Women need commitment, men don't. Think about it.

[@MrMajid070]

Sista you made good points. Especially when you mentioned "Risks". I'm 43. And yes I do the "pre-dating" thing. Lot more at risk now. And unfortunately there are just too many dysfunctional people out there. Bad decisions in the past have forced me to be real patient while getting to know these women. We're gonna move real slow and careful. I can't afford to make a bad decision.

[@christopherparker843]

Unfortunately, you're right. I can say that because I am a man over 40 and it's difficult for me to become emotionally attached to anyone. But women can be just as detached as men. It's the," I don't care" attitude and I am sure that many have felt it in one form or another. I think the real challenge is to re-engage with emotion while using reason to guide you through romance? What do you think? Chris

[@ingwis]

I wish I knew how to do this!

[@augustinaonuwundijo9580]

I wish l know

[@flauze]

I love how she tries to make HER goals into a man's goals. Men don't care about marriage. Anyways.....welcome to life as a 20yr old man. Older women are getting karma for how they USE to treat men in their younger years.

[@derekscarrsr2688]

flauze like the song says it ain't no fun when the rabbits got the gun.

[@marvinmckinley6220]

Derek S Carr Sr it also ain't no fun when you lose all of your money to the lottery hint hint

[@thagodwork]

flauze 🤗👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍🤐!!!!!!!!......

[@paperclip6993]

This is exactly what it is , I use there old lines on them now, I call them creepy, insecure. I tell them they are not acting confident.

[@peopleas1healingtrauma]

Lmao

[@cleopatrawf]

Wow lots of bitter men on here 😯. As a woman in her 40s I can relate to what many of these guys r saying and do the same thing this woman complains about. Pre screening and being upfront is a way of not wasting time and with age comes wisdom and a huge bs monitor. Yes being older can mean being stuck in your ways to a certain extent but it also means knowing who u r and not lowering your standards to suit someone else. I've been thru the coals too much for anyone else to do that get again. I don't agree as many men on here seem. To think that every women wants marriage, perhaps cos I've been there and done that for many yrs. For us women who have their lives together we also don't want someone to come in and drag us down financially or emotionally.

[@ecapolegna30]

Honestly it's hard for anyone to date in today's world. To me it sounds like you're choosing guys that are of the same caliber that were known to play around and not committ until they found the "right one" in their eyes to get married to in their youth. Once they get married to her and finally committ, they might've gotten burned and now that they are in their 40's, they're not willing to give in to anyone and waste time for someone that's they feel will be unstable. The checkers analogy would be an analogy that is used in dating in your 20's bc everybody is trying to "WIN". If you're really trying to date and acquire a long term relationship, you shouldn't be trying to "WIN". Checkers is a game where you try to obtain all of your opponent's pieces, and men in their 40's (the ones that are not willing to committ on your timeline) are playing it smart by not letting you acquire all their pieces. They know you want to win, so they're setting you up like in a game of chess to make you exhaust all your moves to capitalize on them. Let's be honest, you too are only willing to play your first few rows to try to make him play all of his rows, when in fact winning shouldn't be a factor and dating shouldn't be a game. There never should be any guess work for anyone. Say what you mean and mean what you say. If a guy says hello and wants to strike up a conversation, say hello. The person on the receiving end of the conversation always has the decision on the outcome. If everyone were upfront and clear about their intentions, dating and relationships would require less work.

[@lisaariottiart]

well said..... it's a traumatic landscape out there if you don't think before you act.

[@Chandra5]

So are people not comfortable with a prenuptial agreement? I thought that would help provide security to both parties involved

[@robertjohnson4401]

Cha Cha It does not take the risk away, they frequently do not hold up in divorce court.

[@Chandra5]

Robert Johnson idk they seem to be holding these days, which is why they are more popular. Anywho, people seem to have the wrong idea about marriage, it's sad so many men think it's about a woman cashing out. I know I'm perfectly fine with a sacred ceremony vs. a marriage. It's about me and my man agreeing upon being one. Also I don't want anyone to stay with me bc they are afraid to leave due to legal/financial ramifications. If you're not happy and not willing to do the work...leave. I'm not holding anyone hostage, life is too short for that. So yeah, I want a sacred ceremony with a lovely reception.

[@jab7168]

please cite where they are generally holding up in court.

[@Chandra5]

#TeamSacredCeremony

[@freeswimmin]

a prenup is like the u.s. constitution or santa claus ... it only has power over those who believe in its power and abide by it.

[@imagesfromLA]

Teneice, do you realize everything you're saying is exactly the same way most men feel about women? Too many rules, afraid of wasting time . . . all things women seem to cling to. And yes, it was easier to date when we were younger. Both parties are discovering themselves, discovering what they want in a partner, just looking to have fun. Boy, those were the days weren't they?

[@ariraquel4567]

imagesfromLA i miss those ..real love ..Wheres my girl mary j blidge? she put it on the map ..real 💘

[@imagesfromLA]

Ari Raquel, don't hate me, but I was never feeling Mary J. Blidge. I was probably transitioning to the smooth jazz thing when she was coming out. Now I'm on to listening to NPR or the sports station. My my my how our tastes change as we age.

[@ingwis]

It's almost like women and men are people and really not that different after all.

[@peopleas1healingtrauma]

Lol

[@barabebe]

.... that is why as a black women divorce raising a young boy and being 39 I’ve decided to pursue a PhD, work hard to get my son to college, have a career in an international organization and spend the rest of my life changing other people lives...☺️🤓i cannot win in this game so I am not playing...beside, not all of us will have a man in our lives....

[@MansSuperPower]

Yes, yes, and yeeeeeessssss! Let’s goooooo men 38 and up!!! This video is a “compliment” to men 38 and up. Thanks for making it. I’m relaxed at 40 now. I’m immune to her bs. I’m straight to the point and gone quickly.

[@peopleas1healingtrauma]

Lol

[@jackburtonstwin]

Brutal truth: men over 40 have the experience, wisdom and resources to know that they are now the high value partner. It's pretty well open season on women from 20 years old and upwards. Also, if the guy has been through a divorced, you can expect the system to have made him considerably more risk-averse than he was as a young man.

[@maryjacobs3029]

Girl have fun in life and if the right one come along good if not good to. Enjoy your life do you ,you are young.

[@jerijordan_]

Love your take on dating It's complicated for no reason

[@mndjrican]

Trust takes a long time to build!! A lot of sisters also use the word "friends" hence a lot of brother don't trust!! Real talk!

[@63Baggies]

The vast majority of women wear WAY TOO MUCH makeup; there is also an issue with the way these products are applied. LESS IS MORE!

[@peopleas1healingtrauma]

I rather be natural mostly

[@peopleas1healingtrauma]

Of the time

[@jeromed.2505]

Provided the older man has himself together and established. A woman has to ask herself "aside from sex, what do I have to offer to make his life better?" If she doesn't have a good answer, it's best to not go further in the relationship.

[@thespadestable]

@Jerome D - Most don't because who and what they are revolve around their sexuality; remember, it's men's job to entertain them and validate their existence.

[@jamesweatherspoon4823]

Good afternoon I'm curious how old are you? i heard u mention u r attracted to older men,do you have a age limit when it comes to dating older men?

[@realaussiemale567]

We’ve been burnt, ripped off, sent broke, had our hearts torn from our chests, been told it’s not our fault, when really it was. Treat us like equal partners in a field, that a lot of us haven’t been a part of for a long time.

[@jluke7440]

Your exactly right on a lot of points I'm a 42 yr old male divorced in my late 30s lost most of all I'd worked for since I was 26 including my time with my children and that's probably why men put up an extra wall it's not anything towards woman just being extra careful only a fool will make the same mistake twice,but if you have patience and prove your not gonna cut and run out when it gets a little tough sometimes,we'll let you in and we'll BOTH be happy..but what I've seen and i date mostly in 28-35 yr age group most women want it now so they shit test us by going silent or breaking up to get their way which only puts us back at square one..did this with a girl I dated almost 3 years I knew she was the one I wanted to eventually marry but she flip shit about every 6 months and in my mind I'd have to start over with her,I hate it didn't work out but I can't take a chance on another f up at this stage in my life

[@briangriggs]

J Luke same experience. Well stated.

[@Michellemybell739]

No J Luke she obviously was NOT the one if you were stringing her along for 3 years!

[@anthonyedwards2534]

Just saw your video and I want to encourage you to hang in there. I am happily married for 21 years and in my mid 50's. I have an older sister who is 60 and in the same predicament as many black women of a "certain age". The most important thing I would suggest in looking/finding/keeping a man is a man with good character; not one who IS a character. It may be disheartening at times, but they are still out there. Good luck and God bless you.

[@rickingraham4451]

You may have selected some bad apples. they may be more protective of their feelings and more speculative of the paths before them, I like your upfront realization of risk as your feelings are put out there too. your right..man up and explore the relationship possibilities

[@lisaariottiart]

I like your straight shooting intelligence 🙌🏻

[@rickingraham4451]

Lisa, hello... Thank you

[@CurtisReese-tl7ip]

Dating require same amount of effort, same amount of energy and same amount of money

[@lesliealmanza9722]

How old are you if you don't mind mentioning it? I am 28 and naturally attracted to older men as well. Currently, I'm dating someone that is 40. I'm definitely enjoying it and if things don't work out, I feel comfortable dating another 40 yo man.

[@nosimpin]

Leslie Almanza u should u can still carry a legacy to term.these other 35 to 40 something old dusty womb chicks need to just get on back page and do what they been. doing for years and get a check

[@TheGamerz_Hub]

Leslie Almanza same, I'm naturally attracted to older men. I'm 19 ( going on 20) and seeing someone who's 37.

[@phaejai285]

Wow im 28 and is a attracted to 40 year old man too...he's so sexy

[@josephinedonnelley5866]

I'm 25 and dating someone over 40. I'm fine with it. I know other people are not but I try not to listen to it.

[@newnimprovesT3]

Phaedra Pugh lol

[@klevdavful]

by a certain age 38 - 40 men collectively think about their experiences with women in Men start to understand that it's not a man's place to understand a woman and men understand that women don't know what they want also men or less likely to be manipulated because believe it or not a lot of them by that age, have develop better intuition as to what woman is worth taking a chance on. if a man is 38 to 40 and has never married and has never had children he realizes he's rare and needs only to just take his time and pick wisely . he knows that a lot of women women 30 to 40 he knows are still riding the cock carousel. at least in 2017.

[@anthonymcinnis5815]

klevdavful ko

[@nightrider3280]

YES IN DEED I COULDN'T HAVE SAID IT BETTER MY SELF , CAUSE AFTER SEEING AND LISTENING TO SOME LADY'S IN MY LIFE TIME , A LOT OF THEM DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT A REAL REAL MAN IS UNTIL HE'S GONE , BELIVE IT OR NOT ; CAUSE IF ANYONE KNOW THESE WORDS HERE (YOU HAVE LOST A GOOD THING) : AND "YOU CAN'T GET IT BACK" SHOULD KNOW WHAT I MEAN, SO TO THE REAL REAL ONES OUT THERE MEANING MEN ; KEEP YOUR EYE OPEN ! AND KEEP YOUR HEAD UP ! CAUSE WHEN THE REAL RIGHT LADY COMES "SHE'LL SURELY KNOW YOU JUST AS YOU WILL SURELY KNOW HER" .

[@ingwis]

Here's a PSA for you: Women over 40 do know what tf they want, they've had time to think about it. If you date women your own age, this is a good thing. You know what you want, she knows what she wants, we're dealing with each other as adults!

[@klevdavful]

@@ingwis if u want to entertain the idea based on facts we can.

[@ingwis]

@@klevdavful Not sure what you mean..

[@keithbailey6143]

Why should dating or any other personal relationship be a “risk” or involve “risks”? What type of risk are you referring to?

[@MrShytown77]

They are feeling you out to see if you are crazy..Men over 40 are waiting for you to show your character.

[@davidowens1429]

You are missing a key point. Older men usually are set in what they do and don't like. They commonly have seen so many different things as well as types of women. Manipulating tactics used commonly by women they aren't willing to abide. They could also be at a point due to past relationships that they merely do not want a real relationship headed in a permanent direction. Like men of any age you have to find out the type man he is at that point. Then be okay with it as well of accepting who he is, and his wants. Some men want things to just happen naturally without any labels or pressure. He may also be the type who enjoys being with you in whatever capacity yet doesn't want a relationship with you. By that I mean a real committed relationship naturally progressing to whole nine yards. Not a bad thing just merely is. Could also be a combination of things. If you date while having sex yet aren't in a relationship gradually/naturally moving forward within 6 months to a year reevaluate. You should start getting feelings about it after a month of heavy dating, sex, and contact/ involvement.

[@josephBC3652]

Pan Is Drunk very well said I like your viewpoints

[@WarriorPoet7]

I'm 48 and, I've been through hell in my past relationships. So therefore, I fully understand why men my age have trust issues, "rules," etc. Men my age, especially men like myself who are true gentlemen and nice guys, have grown emotionally fatigued with all of the mind and heart games a lot of women put us through. So, why is it shocking to you that men in their 40s have rules, regulations and stipulations??

[@frankwaiterswarrior4peace]

You are thoughtful ,insightful,charming and beautiful just looking for answers.I'm a senior citizen and I like what i see a.nd hear.

[@harmonymusiqtheoriginalone3517]

These men in their 40's run ladies as fast as you can in the opposite direction. My husband is 49 and I am 43. My husband is aging faster and the mid life crisis is hitting and it is ruining our marriage. He never wants to go anywhere or do anything besides have sex and it is not good sex because I count to 5 and its over. Now I see why many women cheat with younger men. I have always honored my vows but I see a divorce very soon because he is too old and boring and people thinks he is my dad. Ugh creepy💔💔💔 I married the wrong man.

[@MrStlover99]

Lmfao, 40 is still young. Im.not dating a.woman unless she is.marriage material though. If the woman does not want kids, I'm not dating her. I want kids, so that and the woman can not be immature and loud all the time. Those are my 2 rules

[@vlee7217]

Shawn Moses that sounds easy

[@MrStlover99]

@Anna Cadwell who are you speaking of?

[@MrStlover99]

@Anna Cadwell I'm 44 with more energy than 20 year olds. I never wanted a baby mama.

[@mcars100]

The pre-screening is the man waiting for the women to submit after a while he will come to the conclusion the women is either submitting and he'll have a relationship or two she is being dominant and he'll check out.

[@goodscentsbadscentsshane615]

Keep the faith, I get what your saying, not all older guys are like that but I get some of why they are.

[@1ezduischoolllc297]

Absolutely enjoyed hearing about your experience dealing with us 40yr olds

[@kjohnson6068]

Wow! So much male bitterness in these comments! Thank you for this video. I am noticing this pattern with men in my age group not wanting to commit. How can so many lonely souls be online dating....yet are afraid to commit. I'm getting so discouraged, I'm thinking of deleting my dating profile. We've ALL been hurt! But if I can open myself up to the possibility of a relationship, so can these men!

[@mgtowarena9636]

K.... the "bitterness" is just they typical comment that women use when they have no logical response to a statement. What do you care if men are afraid to "commit" or not? Monogamy is a social construct, and men have been told for decades that women are strong and independent and not needed. No one on this comment thread has really discussed "being hurt"... you just interpret statements the way you want to. There are reasons why men have left the "dating game" and marriage rates have declined over the past 3 decades and divorce rates are still at 50%.

[@jerrybruckhart9134]

@@mgtowarena9636 That 50% divorce rate is pretty deceiving, I think intentionally. What they did was only take the stats out to the 20 year anniversary, if one goes out to 40 years the divorce rate is 65%

[@mgtowarena9636]

@@jerrybruckhart9134 instagram.com/p/Br0L5azl7A6/? Yes, I recently saw that the other day.

[@ConsidertheCrows]

Low risk relationship is fine. Companionship. Friendship. Do not insist on anything after being told no. Do not ask for us to stick our neck out. Do not make any ultimatums or demands. Do not endanger us.

[@peopleas1healingtrauma]

Wow

[@devPunks]

100% FIGURED OUT WHAT THE ISSUE WAS! "He doesn't want to move his red pieces. You know in checkers there's red and black." Dating is CHESS NOT CHECKERS! You playing the wrong game home girl! With all due respect learn chess. not checkers. Checkers is a little boy's game. Chess is a man's game. It LITERALLY teaches you about love and war and longevity. But Truth be told most women I try to mention relationships are CHESS not CHECKERS they claim they want a chess player but keep with a checkers mentality. #message. TOTALLY serious about learning chess. Totally figurative about you playing checkers. The goal of CHECKERS is to capture as many as you can. It's a free for all. Every piece for themselves. The goal of CHESS is to CAPTURE THE KING! You're using an analogy where capturing ANY pieces is the name of the game. Can't complain when you get any man. Chess there's only 1 piece to capture that you need a team to help you. And there's always another woman on the board that will give you competition for the king. Let that sit in.. . AGAIN stop playing basic games. You'll remove the basic men out of your life. There are two directions you can take after checkers. In one direction is CHESS. In the other is Connect4. Choice is yours. www.marcensign.com/are-you-playing-checkers-or-chess/ I Literally learned chess. And figuratively the checkers women disappeared out of my life. #score. I can help teach you if interested. Tons of online boards.

[@mrstevens70]

I'm glad to hear guys of quality are more careful with who they want to settle down with.

[@clownman9859]

I'm 40...an 81 baby.. Which is the best era of transition... Btw!..you skin is flawlessly made... Secondly I'm so attracted to your attitude and charisma,,so magnetic with a sprinkle of realness!.. Nicely done!.. Stay cool an have patience... Faith n good credit, essentially needed when coming full circle 🔵.. No big brush painting... Alot of men out here are still wonderfully funny am alpha in a comfort way out here.. Have a relaxed day..

[@derekscarrsr2688]

sounds like she's dating men who are drama queens, I'm in my 50s and swear I see it all the time dudes in their 40s that are worse than the women, I don't understand it.

[@johannabaidya9535]

Sis! This is so accurate. I've been "predating" a 43 yr old man for a year and a half 😭😂 but both of us are too stubborn to take the next step. I enjoy his company though! Great video!

[@alordi2701]

How old are u?

[@fredrickwilliams1885]

Blame Feminism!

[@scottyboomboom8803]

Fredrick Williams

[@peopleas1healingtrauma]

Lmao

[@ingwis]

Hahaaaa! Such a convenient scapegoat for underdeveloped men.

[@princerob610]

Partnership is about understanding and compromise

[@shawnhector7931]

you are so right I don't want to play no games I just want to find my soulmate live the rest of my life and happiness and love because there ain't no girls around here where I live at that are ready for that type of life if you know of some let me know so we can start dating

[@welshhibby]

who 'dates' anymore ? its all about hooking up now. #netflicksandchill

[@peopleas1healingtrauma]

Me n my man does that lol 😂

[@AdoreInVegas]

Teneice - What I have learned is you have to stop looking at marriage as “the win”. This is not a game of any sort. Know what you want, don’t settle for less. “pre-dating” is for people with “pre-school” minds. They abide by the 3 Date Rule where, if you don’t allow intimacy by the third date, they move on. Don’t look at that as a fail - that’s a win for you, they just showed you they are ‘bout that bullsh!t. Date to have fun, get to know a person, and don’t just date one person at a time. Keep things light, no sex. A brother who sees your true value and is a gentleman is patient and kind. Treat the ones who are patient as an equal - treat him to coffee or a movie sometimes. But, most of all, treat him with respect, if he shows YOU respect. That goes for any age group. ❤️

[@jameskemper1735]

Good points

[@davidw4812]

I'm so glad not all women feel this way. I'm 44 and feel great and more confident than I did when I was twenty. We have far more to offer than a young inexperienced man who still hasn't grown up or got his shit together.

[@darrylbailey8397]

David Williams Get a passport, women of other cultures will be more feminine and receptive to your needs.

[@danielb516]

Pre screening is not beneficial? Omg ....you gotta dig into her past to see what kinda person she is ....if she screwed over her last boyfriend quess what ? Your next .Lol

[@s.a.5566]

Im 49yrs old and single, what's the real problem and why do you think your having it. After listening to your video, I can say the same thing. Sounds like im having the same problem with my sisters.

[@name4506]

SOOO TRUE about the makeup thing lol!!!

[@ozarkprepper1718]

Im over 40 and I dont care about anything but enjoying life.I steer clear of drama and financial debt.I can break it down simple for any woman who wants to know what men want. We want 3 things from you. Faithfull, sexyness,and quiet.If you posess those 3 things you can live life without working.

[@chandralansdown5779]

Glad you talked about this subject! What I find interesting is that men in the 40's (you would think) should be done with playing games! I, JUST TODAY, had to cancel a dude because he EVEN AFTER he said he was too old to play games, that's all he did! Funny how times and the dating scene has changed!

[@brownhornet9702]

Hahahahaha!!! @ the older dudes having a second wind.

[@jaydubblupdbsproductions7985]

by the way you are a beautiful woman.love your blogs,content..keep doing them..jay

[@mdogruc]

Men at their forties are experienced enough about energy vampires, immature selfish women.. What makes you think that you're entitled to have commitment by a man, while having a big baggage on your back and there's only sex you can offer? This is called solipsism and there's a bunch of miserable single moms out there.

[@rev.ruffrevelations9659]

My lady is 26 and I am 39. She is naturally attracted to older men and she says the same thing about men in there 40's

[@josephfoster30]

Nice.

[@ErickaWilliamsCC]

Mkku Neteru naw 90% of girls under 30 are like 30 is old. she loves what older men can do for her. check back in 10 years for now.

[@diowil1]

"Heavy duty pre screening" ... gotta love the application process, I just misplaced my "keeper" file!

[@eltonwashington596]

I turn "58"in July I have RETIRED and been around the WORLD a few times.The ladies of today can not compare to yesteryear."self esteem"Is missing.Retired USCG

[@dennisjardine4089]

I don't know why women are so hung up on the marriage thing. It is way overrated. My take is to enjoy the ride and have fun and forget about the marriage thing. Life is so much better without it.

[@jerrybruckhart9134]

Of course you know, it is the easiest path to resources she didn;t need to work for.

[@sunbox4700]

Because men don't want to pay and care for a woman until marriage. Only in marriage men spend a lot of money on a weed woman.

[@jackfruitearth702]

Perhaps your frequent use of profanity is what turns them off.

[@shawnhector7931]

im 47 and i am haveing the same problem nobody wants to grold old together were are the good girl at

[@alphabanks]

I am one of those guys I spent twenty years in a relationship that went nowhere. So yes I have higher standards I don't plan on getting caught up again. When you have been through a long term failed relationship it gives you a different perspective on life.

[@joys3175]

I totally agree with you and definitely can relate. Im attracted to older men as well.

[@mic01]

I'm in my 40's financially secure never been married nor wanted kids. I have always dated younger but will never be married, just find many women don't bring enough to the table for a steady relationship. I'll be damned if I'm going to get into a relationship only to have her looking for a payday at the end.

[@dionbrooks4981]

U must be a younger dude

[@karebaby700]

I can say the same thing about a man trying to get over on a financially stable female.

[@jerrybruckhart9134]

@@karebaby700 Of course you can say it, doesn't mean that such cases are a significant portion of the statistics though.

[@karebaby700]

@@jerrybruckhart9134 what does your stats say? All I am saying is that it's hard.

[@jerrybruckhart9134]

@@karebaby700 I am not computer literate, therefore am not going to take the time to search for a link. But from my memory something in the neighborhood of 95% of alimony is paid by men, to women, that is part of what the OP was referring to.

[@kelvinellis8611]

Hello There, how does 44 sound?

[@adrianposey7341]

Hey, where are you from?

[@bigfootdoesntbelieveinyoue6856]

Are you sure it's not because you give off constant signals that makes them second guess you as a choice. For example, swearing, aggressive voice patterns, rapid blinking, constantly rolling your eyes, speaking so fast you can barely take a breath, did I mention constantly rolling your eyes cause I know that really pisses most men off. Just saying

[@ingwis]

What is an "aggressive voice pattern"?

[@PLTbyCormie]

You guys are probably running into the same guy because you are dating narcissists..they are all the same..why not date younger or just wait til you know the person and you know it's right

[@jerrybruckhart9134]

Even the younger ones are getting tougher, 70% of men age 20 to 34 are never married, that is not a coincidence.

[@sirmac89]

it's your circle you keep dating the same guy no matter how old you are.

[@godgod2227]

Now where are these men from? I realise my sister and brothers in the states have a whole different vibes than we do in the WI and other around the world. But love love though