DEALING WITH NEGATIVE COMMENTS || TRUE TALK WITH TED|| S06E12

[@anebimartha913]

I think you ladies look absolutely gorgeous especially with the added weight. You radiate God's glory. As a new mom myself and someone who's naturally slim, i lost weight after childbirth due to stress and i keep getting negative comments especially from people in the church. It nearly landed me in postpartum depression. Like you said, these people don't and can never understand what you're going through. I'd give almost anything to put on some weight now, but I've learned to love myself as i am. Beauty goes beyond the exterior. My beauty comes from inside out. I avoid those who see nothing good and say nothing good about me. As long as i feel good about myself, nobody else can tell me otherwise.

[@treasureolorundare7438]

You are beautiful ❤❤❤

[@robertkaris685]

When some people appreciate adding weight some are against it. Very funny.

[@anebimartha913]

@@treasureolorundare7438 thanks so much!❤️❤️❤️

[@divinelove9836]

It's true I was just about to say that the weight has added to their beauty

[@melanieprice5535]

I love the Mike Bamiloye family and ministry. The churches in the US rarely preach repentance, holiness, or Godliness anymore. Their "Christian" movies reflect this secular mindset. In the Nigerian Christian movies the Word of God comes to life on the screen. Most African American movies in the US show black women that are pencil thin and of lighter skin complexions. Nigerian movies feature God's amazing handiwork of African women; all shades of complexion - all shapes and sizes. Thanks for the true representation of the scriptures and for casting such beautiful sister drama ministers.

[@robertkaris685]

This stood out to me "You can control your response" When are you getting married? Very soon, intensify your prayers for me.

[@Dorindameghan]

We will eat the wedding rice when it is ready in Pastor Mildred Okonkwo’s voice 😁

[@OmaleOjimaojo]

whoa...😔 I didn't really see talking this way to people as something bad. I do see it as something casual I wasn't really conscious that it was bad. Thank you Jesus and thank you TED for opening my eyes to see 🙏

[@RoseAtieno-y5e]

It is really bad and insensitive body shaming is wrong

[@audreybikele]

This message is so inspiring!!!!!!! I am 23 yrs old Cameroonian and everybody in my family and my church knew me as a very skinny person(49KG). It was actually because of poor nutrition and stress during my Masters thesis. These were the ones always speaking about my dry weight etc. But when I came to Ghana and started enjoying sweet money, and rest, I started adding weight up to now I'm 75kg. I became frustrated because the same church members and even my mum were now the ones criticizing the size of my stomach and my cheeks. But God helped me to forgive and to understand that it is what He says about me that matters. Thanks TED!!!!! God bless you!! love you so much!!!!!!!!

[@Hop-Ella2.0]

Cameroonians let us gather here, God bless u ma

[@juliembungu]

" If grace is not coming from them, you, release the grace. " This episode BLESSED me ! Thank you !

[@deboraholatunji9625]

I love this particular episode!! People can sound negative!! I remember this time last year,a friend and a colleague at work lost her pregnancy due to some medical reasons and a fellow colleague walked up to her and accused her of aborting the pregnancy! It was so painful and embarrassing! God bless this particular lady yesterday 29th November with a bouncing baby boy!!🥰🥰 I rejoice with her knowing the pain she felt when she lost the baby last year ! No matter what the hate comment is about,trust God and know it would only be a part of your story!! Thank you TED!!🤗🤗

[@Dorindameghan]

Sometimes it as if the devil just see that person to tempt you. I mean who does that ???

[@deboraholatunji9625]

@@Dorindameghan You are right! It is only God who can help one control his/her emotions and actions in times like that!

[@bettysnewbeginnings]

I’m glad you guys have talked about this .. there is a book I read that is very powerful… “keep it shut” by Karen Ehman.. she did justice to this and I think every believer should get a copy.. Welldone sisters.. Shalom!!

[@osavictor5486]

Thank you for the book referral, I am getting a copy.

[@tomisinojo3206]

The point of having a scripture in hand to counter the negativity is really resounding. 💯

[@yetundeogunlana4007]

A lot of people lack emotional intelligence and don’t know any better. I believe they say words like this as some sort of conversation starter without actually know how much those innocent words hurt others. In my case for instance, I have passed comments about weight gain to those in my close circle in the past especially if I hadn’t seen them in a long time. I have learned to be cautious when dealing with everyone. Thank you TED for raising this conversation and I actually believe that conversations like this should continue especially in the church.

[@temychrismusings9501]

True.

[@nyebestrongman9369]

I got married in 2020 Oct. And I and my wife just welcomed a baby in Sept 2023. Now I remember visiting an uncle with my dad and uncle asked me how many children do have now? And I said by God's Grace am still expecting and he turn to my dad and said this your son is not yet a Man. Hmmmm I felt very bad but I didn't let that weigh me down knowing that my wife lost two pregnancy. What God is saying about is what matters, what man thinks about you doesn't. Just hold unto God and in due time he will wipe away your tears. Say no to negative comment and do not allow any negative comment weigh you down.

[@tetikonan1843]

Ameen, God bless your family !

[@reychellbrooks6276]

I’m so happy you are enjoying God’s faithfulness now after two miscarriages

[@asuquoisangedighi324]

These negative comments can also be termed as uncharitable comments. May God give us grace to overcome them.

[@aliuoluwatobi3129]

I got married three months ago, and some people are stylishly calling me "iya ibeji", this name calling had put a lot of pressure on me so much so that when I saw my monthly flow that month I cried, oh I cried. This message is timely, thanks for this

[@OluwatoyinVictoria-yw6ft]

Hmm!! Same with me, mine was just two months now.

[@chiamakaezekiel2178]

Thank you ted, thank you mrs ellah....u said don't be move by what people say, how God sees u matters, when u are not too consigh of how people praise u, u won't be too attached to their nahative talk, this talk touch me so much, thanks a lot dear.

[@dcutestluv9023]

In my opinion Tolu looks better with d added weight. Thanks for this video❤️

[@deborahnwakuba3738]

I have always seen true talk sisters beautiful,no matter the changes as we grow,we still remain that unique person that God says we are. Thank you so much sisters for this ,I was really blessed. Prayer for patience and temperance is very important, because we might meet negative comments but they don't define us.

[@itunuawogboro]

Lovely conversation, God bless you all sisters. Please also speak to people who have endured years of verbal abuse or bullying and practical steps that can be taken to overcome i.e. therapy, counselling, mentorship, prayer, bible studies etc...

[@ruthford111.]

Very true

[@toluoyeniyi7839]

I had to ignore some hate speech in the past to be emotional stable. God bless you TED

[@_adenike]

It would be great to hear practical steps on overcoming this

[@olukemisowemimo1027]

Thank you TED sisters for this episode. I love the angle you discussed it from 👍 Unfortunately, a lot of people hardly mind their business, even some believers struggle with minding their own business. A lot of these attacks/body shaming come from brethren too. I have had my fair share of body shaming to my face, not even online, and like sis T said, thank God that my identity is not in my stature. So those nasty comments simply rolled down my back like water. I have also come to understand that insecure people project themselves and their own low self esteem on other people, so I simply ignore nasty comments and move on. I look in the mirror each day and thank God for who He’s made me, my looks and all, despite and in-spite of the insensitive comments I get. Thank you TED

[@noblecrystal3050]

Words are really powerful. Even when you don't want to think about the words heard, they still have a way of replaying in the minds they are shot at. But the good news is that we can control the play button by choosing what we think and reconstruct what has been heard to what should be heard by you. I choose to hear, meditate, and grow by what God has said concerning me. Thanks TED for bringing up such a sensitive issue🤗 I pray that my words will be seasoned with grace always and not hurt in Jesus name, amen.

[@salometsado928]

Thank you for this awesome episode again, it was illuminating. Personally, I have wept, felt bad and have memories of so many negative comments from people that I am skim, it's funny how these negative comments come from church people. The Holy Spirit isn't just a figure to help you pray for 12 hours, he is also there to help you say the rights things to people at the right time. For everyone suffering from the hurts of verbal abuse and negatively comments may we all find true meaning and essence in God.

[@toboreobire4105]

M SO GRATEFUL TO GOD FOR THIS SHOW,I WENT FOR RURAL RUGGED AND EVERYTHING WAS GOING WELL,ALL OF A SUDDEN I STARTED FEELING BAD BECAUSE I OVERHEAD A NEGATIVE COMMENT ABOUT ME,I WAS SO DOWN I GOT CARRIED AWAY WITH MY ASSIGNMENT,I WAS DEPRESSED IN AS MUCH AS I LOVE INTERCESSION AND SOUL WINNING I GOT CARRIED AWAY,BUT TNK GOD FOR HIS MERCY HE HELP ME ON THE LAST DAY,I HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS MESSAGE,I KNOW THIS ONE IS FOR ME,TNK U SO MUCH TED

[@rosedanladi8240]

Maybe am different but I LLLove LLove it when a lady gets married and put up that little weight after birth..I admire it a lot. Thank you for bringing this to our hearts that our words should be coated with grace

[@dcutestluv9023]

Same ooo I consider it as enjoymemt for them

[@rosedanladi8240]

Honestly

[@estheryumzOluz3583]

The opposite happened to me..people thought I was going to add weight after marriage & childbirth but I didn't.. a lot of people said insensitive comments because of that, but God has helped me to know how to filter it out and it doesn't affect me anymore. It's just my beautiful God-given physique 😊

[@Dorindameghan]

I don’t understand oo if you become fat they will say it and you that didn’t gain weight after giving birth they shade u too . Aaarh dis world no balance oo

[@evelynmawunyo8590]

God bless you all may God help us to stand firm ooo because is not easy. I remember last month at my church introduction was made about two people of getting married all of us were happy shout celebrating them one woman just walked towards me and said when are you also bringing your own in front of people😢 infact i was ashamed don't know what to say i just reply her very soon she said that was politicians saying meaning you have no relationship I have to leave without uttered a word again 😢😢😢 because i know am not in any relationship 😢 i felt soo bad that Sunday 😔 God bless you ted for this message 🙏 🙌

[@Dorindameghan]

You shld hv rebuked her in Jesus name . The devil was indeed speaking thru her

[@olaitantriol2380]

Thanks a lot for this. It makes me remember a certain time that my face was spacelessly clustered with pimples. I went out to buy something and the vendor shouted as soon as she saw me, " ahn ahn, see your face. Don't you look at the mirror?". I thank God for my immediate response. I told her, "so if I look at the mirror and see my face, I should lock myself at home or what?". I like the fact that I was able to shun her with my response. As we all pray for the Grace to control our tongues, I suggest we also pray for the Grace to give the right responses to people who don't control theirs. In a way, I feel one would be fulfilled when he gives the right responses. Thanks a lot for this TED

[@AmarachiNwosu-vx2yl]

This is awesome, thank God for you,the glory of God is really seen in you. Keep impacting

[@millicentsamuel8924]

Thank you so much this is really timely. I refuse to be moved by any negative talk.

[@JesusLebtUndRettet]

This Talk has trully blessed me. Thank you so much from Germany Sisters through Christ.

[@lizzymwamba7546]

Thank you for this I am not married yet but the way people are unkind to women who have just become mothers about their bodies is so discouraging it’s not like people choose it you literally housed a whole human being

[@temitopecrown5763]

Well as good as it is to educate people about insensitive comments. It is also important to learn to feel good about your body personally and the changes that takes place after certain processes like childbirth. People process criticism differently, but, it's key to pick the lessson. For example, i put on so much weight after my 3rd baby and i have gotten all manner of comments, but, i'm deliberate to shield my heart from such arrows and i decided to start working out to get back to shape.

[@CHINECHEREMCHIJIOKE-t3v]

Thanks so much for this talk show. it really helped me to reflect and think about how i talk to others, and what they say 'bout me. God bless you.

[@ottahprincess7952]

Am always blessed whenever i listen to u all.am very happy for coming across u guys.... I've learnt so much May Good God continuosly bless you all🙏🙏

[@christafon]

I have recieve words like this and I’m tired already but I bless God for His grace upon my life 😊

[@evelynadu-poku5539]

Aaww my heart is filled with Joy always, anytime I listen, i gets super excited and even more when I get the notifications alert❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥💃God bless u all for me oooo🙏🙏🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️🫶🫶🫶❤️❤️❤️❤️‍🔥love ya ..mwuah

[@jubileeakpan3783]

Thank you so much, TED for this amazing episode. Here I am admiring God's goodness and blessings in your lives, marriage, having children and all of God's goodness, and just hearing the negative comments that people pass.... it's really a lot. I love what JayMikee did, anyway 😊. I pray that God really helps Christians, honestly. Most times, it's people who claim to be children of God that end up hurting others with their words. Honestly, knowing what God says about us really helps. No matter what people say, our validation comes from God. God bless you my sweet sisters 🥰💜

[@elizabethadams9321]

I felt you guys were talking to me off as recently my friend said I make sensitive comments towards where it wasn’t my intention however she blew it in a portion. I did apologise; however, what I have learnt is to be careful of my words.

[@MaryOguama-zb2bs]

Return negative words with words of Grace. In life offense must come, allow it move, don't pick it up least u be hurt.

[@Dorindameghan]

We can’t be more stronger than that only the Holy Spirit can help us to deal with such negative comments oo

[@oluyemioluwabusolami6055]

This is a wonderful message. A few weeks ago, a relative called me a bastard because of a misunderstanding from somewhere else totally. I was so sad and hurt because i shared blood woth this relative. But 1st Peter 2:9 came to me, a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation and a peculiar person. I am a prophet ordained to nations. God reminded me of who I am and who He has created me to be. I was sad but God came through for me in His love letter to me. I was able to overcome that by His help.

[@reedblessed]

God bless you! You all are beautiful mothers😘🥰 ~a grandma watching from Norfolk, Virginia~

[@ChristinaAckah-v4q]

I was told about the way I walk and a whole lot from someone I don't even expect from. And I replied wow then that is great. Meaning I am queen because of Jesus so anytime I am walking it get your attention. And that kept the person from any other words so is very true. God would help us

[@Boluwatifeyusuf-sd7eq]

You all are so pretty. Keep up the good work, ma'am. God bless y'all

[@gracechinda8107]

This is so for me.......I mean,just recently I went for a meeting with my pastor and 3 other women which amongst was his fiancee.......after the meeting he looked @ me and smiled den turned to his lady and said if fat after we marry ehn,(jokingly tho)hmmmmm my head was down and the feeling was so bad,I went home and couldn't eat,I cried nd told my husband abt it,and he said some encouraging words......like loving me the way I am,and dat only his opinion should matter to me......hmmmm it took time for me to chear up so I totally understand the feeling.......

[@SPMHTV]

You cant control what people say, but you can control how you respond to it jare darling.

[@CNB436]

Feeling really bad right now, I can't show it that I am broken inside because I have to be strong. I've gone through a lot and still not out of it fully and negative comments is overwhelming

[@oyinzcraft]

One thing I also know is that no matter how you look, people will talk. When you are still slim before getting married just like the way I look now, people will say you are too slim and after getting married and giving birth, you add weight, people will still talk, they will say you are too fat. Just learn to appreciate yourself and do what works for you.

[@motivationbynetseb]

Continued blessings to you all👏👏🏻👏🏿👏🏾👏🏽

[@stella8538]

Beautiful and very encouraging topic

[@monikakililwa8723]

Thank you so much more grace for more video

[@damilolaabiola9696]

God bless you, dear sisters! ❤❤❤ It is my first time cementing on this platform as this one hit on a personal level😂. So each time I have a baby, I add 10kg each time. So sister Dara, your own an chubby and fine! Sis Tolu, nothing do you! Imagine 30kg within 7 years of marriage 😅 emi fit fam, diet planner! Wo, my favorite scripture regarding my weight became "The righteous shall be FAT and Flourishing" see, mo flourish gan because The Word cannot lie😂😂😂 (although am still tieing tommy like hunter! They call it waist trainer) Have a blessed day, my darling! God bless you!

[@rachaelinioluwa7463]

Awww am so so happy with this topic , more grace mummy's❤

[@MamieRuthAruna]

You ladies are beautiful 😍😍😍 keep doing the work of God and God bless you guys

[@baylahokeke9756]

This is such a beautiful episode... Very relatable too... Thank you so much Ted!

[@elizabethadewale8614]

Thanks so much TED for this beautiful episode 🙏

[@oluwakemiesther3855]

Thanks so much TED for this topic. God bless you sisters

[@oladejoeunice5172]

Always looking forward to see new episodes 🎉🎉🎉🎉. More grace ma'am.

[@VivianNkeiruka-jb6eh]

Dara is so beautiful now... God bless you

[@Min.JulieDeborah]

Husband response: I like it like that! It's none of your business

[@Mercci27]

Fat or slim, short or tall TED sisters are always exceptionally beautiful ❤❤❤

[@folashadeadeoye7421]

Most times we don’t have enough information to have an opinion about people’s issues or situations

[@julminabmendy5491]

Thanks so much 😊 for this Episode 😁 I am really blessed 🙏 Everything said here, stood out for me,

[@toluwanimiajetunmobi5964]

Side comment: You guys looked so lovely in shades of blue🥰

[@deborahonanuga]

God bless you ma's this is a blessing AMEN

[@titilopeomowa7856]

Awesome, Our continue to increase you all in HIS wisdom.

[@AyansolaGift]

Thank you so much for this, it is Soo timely. God bless the TED

[@Specialgift9421]

Very timely. God bless you sisters!

[@gideonakintade6339]

Welldone, ladies. Well, in my opinion, this issue of passing negative comments, the best thing is to keep mute! Never comment on how someone looks no matter how close you think you are to that person; don't body shame nobody. My principle is: even if your eyes is going into its sockets, you still look good to me. You've got a mirror at home, if the mirror hasn't spoken loud enough, then who am I?🤷‍♂️ However, I have a question to this effect. I've had some people who get quite offended when this principle of "no caption" is applied. It sometimes passes the message of "he/she doesn't care" but in reality, the intention is simply in a bid not to offend by passing that comment - although I'm not referring to the cases of e-friendships or online acquaintances now, that is a different ballgame entirely. What strategies are to be employed in such circumstances?

[@RitaAudu-lb7yn]

Thank you for this episode I really enjoyed. God bless you my big sisters.

[@FlorenceOyo]

God bless you ladies 😊, indeed let our speech be seasoned with grace

[@jonesella6721]

Thank you so much TED yours words have really encouraged me God bless you ma's

[@ibukunoluwaajayi7276]

Thanks for a wonderful episode! its the beauty for me 🥰. I must say again and again, you are beautiful really TED.

[@lovethnmesoma5401]

All you three are wise 🥰

[@beulah6104]

Wow lovely show and true words indeed. But sis Tolu you sounded so funny to me even while saying the truth love you all

[@RoseAtieno-y5e]

I promised myself that inwill never let get people's words get to me.i gave birth and didn't tie my stomach for long coz it was uncomfortable someone insensitively told me that I have a big belly but I just told him that am comfortable in my body and it's a testimony that it was once a home to my handsome son

[@soyomboeyitayo2408]

Powerful 🔥🔥. Thank you so much TED

[@calvaryChannel.2005]

Thank you TED, am really blessed❤. Watching from Ghana

[@obaduyitemitayo7804]

Thanks for this. Respond with words of grace

[@OluwadarasimiOladiran]

See yourself the way God see you 🙌

[@GoodnessGabrielOfficial]

I needed to hear this because I am going through something like this

[@joshuaolutoke]

This topic is absolutely correct 💯.

[@chidinmachimezie873]

I enjoyed this episode. Thank you TED

[@christafon]

God bless you for this

[@anuoluwapoopemipo]

This really blessed me. God bless you sisters❤

[@politeayikiriza4605]

Sure you cannot control what people say, but you can control your reply ❤

[@jonathanogungbesan1533]

Thank you TED for this word

[@midejoy12]

I Love this❤❤ Thanks for sharing

[@Vickie_Calabar]

A colleague of mine had just gone through a very very terrible phase with her health and losing someone close to her to death and everyone knew. One of the side effects of the drugs and everything was increase in her weight and she was so concerned about it(she talks to me about how she feels and what she does to trim down including skipping meals) and how i try to remind her that she's still pretty and unique. Then one day, someone( a more matured elderly lady)just saw her passing and scornfully said"see nose" while scoffing. I personally felt hurt.

[@toluwanimiajetunmobi5964]

This is so apt!!! Thank you TED

[@kareemmargaretabiade990]

I wish everybody in this world can watch this

[@frankeguzozie5721]

Amen! Thank you mamas❤❤❤

[@stella8538]

You are looking so beautiful my Sisters🥰I love you all

[@uchechiiyeghe1699]

Wow, learned today that you don’t have to base your beauty on your looks

[@olabimpeadefowoju5663]

Thank you, you made my day. God bless you, your family at large, and your ministry in Jesus Name.🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🫂❤️

[@SarahMokwunye]

Thank you dearie

[@stella8538]

Dara Thank you for the prayer🙏

[@OtorokoJoyOrevah]

Indeed. I think it was from Jay Shetty I got this; Words have power, words are power, words can take one from the ruins of life or otherwise. As believers, when the devil comes with his lies via comments from people, probably concerning how you look or how your present state is, ward off the devil with the truths of God's word. For instance you hear a statement from someone that you will remain in poverty just like you father, speak forth God's word concerning you lending to nations and not borrowing, and watch how God will indeed bless the works of your hands. Words can indeed imprison or set free. I am set free by the word of God.🤍🤍

[@ChiamakaAnih]

Most times people speak negatively to others out of the abundance of their own personal struggles and unfulfilled dreams. See such negative individuals as a distraction. Just be fine with yourself and God. Groom yourself under God to the point where neither condemnation nor commendation would affect the strength of your purpose.

[@GabbyElla.]

More Grace🙏

[@phoebembwara5969]

Great truth! Thanks Ella!!

[@tamaraGodschild]

amen sisters

[@jesuyeolabisi5589]

This was a beautiful episode💕

[@nwankwogracious8901]

Weldone. God bless