Differentiating Pathologic Partners in a Relationship from Other Forms of Abuse with Sandra Brown

Episode at a Glance
On this episode of Melody and Friends, I sit down with my friend Sandra Brown to talk about pathology and more specifically dangerous, pathologic partners in relationships. Sandra explains her history in studying pathology and why it is such an important field of study when it comes to abuse in relationships. She tells us what pathology is, how to identify the signs of pathologic partners, and what we can do to help women heal from these extremely traumatic situations.
She also walks through her development of Pathological Love Relationship training for other professionals, and how she has developed survivor-based support services for women who experienced psychopathic partners.
Sandra then talks about personality disorders, from Narcissism to Anti-Social Behavior to Psychopathy, and how each of these types can cause significant damage to a woman emotionally. However, she also provides warning signs to look out for and multiple resources to begin the process of healing from these potent forms of abuse.
Who is Sandra Brown?
Sandra L. Brown, MA, has spent over 30 years working in the psychology field related to psychopathology. Her earlier years were spent developing a dual-focused treatment center for persons with personality disorders who also had trauma disorders. During this time, she also began working, in individual and group sessions, with the partners and children of those with personality disorders. She eventually established one of the country’s first prototype long-term residential treatment centers for women with Multiple Personality Disorder/Dissociative Identity Disorder. Sandra accomplished this while also providing treatment in a women’s inpatient hospital trauma program.
Things We Talk About In This Episode:
What is pathology and why can it often impact victims in a relationship so much more deeply then other forms of abuse?
Why isn't pathology as well studied or understood compared to things like depression or anxiety?
What methods of treatment are available for victims? What should they be looking out for in relationships to spot warning signs of this behavior?
What are personality disorders? How can this affect partners in a relationship?
Resources:
Our listeners can learn more about Sandra's Training, speaking engagements, and get in contact with Sandra by visiting her website: www.sandralbrownma.com
You can also find all of her books, including How To Spot A Dangerous Man, by visiting her Amazon Page here:
www.amazon.com...
Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Melody and Friends! If you haven't already please take the time to leave us a rating and review on our iTunes page as it helps us get more great episodes like this to you!

[@belovedchild9812]

I had childhood trauma plus 2 pathological long term relationships. I started my trauma recovery at age 51. It has taken me 6 years of very hard work to recover. I’m not 100%. But no serious CPTSD symptoms in a year. I’ve been single the whole time I’ve been recovering. I was surrounded by pathological people before. Now I’m free of them. I appreciate your attention to survivors instead of focusing on the pathological person. 🙏

[@Ana-Karina]

Thank you for this informative and interesting discussion. I appreciate Sandra's researched information and experience. Sandra gives survivors very helpful insights into their own traits that work to keep them involved in pathological relationships. Just a note to say that it's not the case that survivors are all women and abusers are all men. Survivors can be both men and women. Women can also have narcissistic personality disorders or anti-social personality disorders. Women can love-bomb, manipulate, target and use men, and the men targeted and involved in such relationships are just as trapped and they also suffer from cognitive dissonance due to emotional, psychological, and even physical abuse. Men can also be financially abused or alienated from their children. I believe it would be helpful to recognise that stereotypes of what the 'typical' abuser and 'typical' survivor look like does not lead to greater public awareness.

[@PlaytimeNana]

Perfect timing. Thank you.

[@sbdsinc8366]

I want to speak to something Sandra mentions. Most therapists have no idea how to address this type of abuse. I’ve had therapists tell me that their boyfriend or spouse was a narcissist, so they know what I’m going through and I therefore should do x or y - similar to the many online videos about narcissism. If its pathological or psychopathic behavior, the advice might be different

[@gailjellison4332]

Very helpful and insightful

[@jsweezey6487]

SOLUTION #1= A "Marriage License" needs to be EARNED & not just a $10 form you fill out & sign. A "Marriage License" can be a "License to Abuse" if it does not have gravitas & accountability. In order to get a Marriage License, WHY NOT REQUIRE: (1)Mental Illness Screening for both partners-esp. for psycho-pathology; (2) In-depth training about DOMESTIC VIOLENCE ABUSE & CHILD ABUSE for both partners (including resources at local, fed & state); (3) In-depth training and DETAILED ESCAPE PLAN for both partners who will agree & sign off on it...??? THIS is exactly what a "Marriage License" should be! It won't prevent all cases of DV-Abuse or Child Abuse, but it's at least some type of PREVENTION. Feel free to poke holes in this theory... It's the only way to find SOLUTIONS... :)