Doctor Reacts to New Amsterdam (a Psychopathic Child?)

[@thedreaming989]

New Amsterdam is the first name of New York City. This show is actually based on a real city hospital Bellevue. In the US we have the age of Criminal Responsibility in NY is now 18 and for children we have the age of juvenile delinquency when you are tried in Family court instead. In NY its 12 so she is still to young to be a juvenile delinquent.

[@DoctorElliottCarthy]

Love learning about how it works in other parts of the world so that's really interesting

[@Lea-is-sleeping]

My first year as a teacher, I had a child like this in my class. I didn't even know such a type of person could exist before I met them. This child would push kids off the jungle gym at recess and break their limbs and then laugh and tell them they had to be their friends. They had no ability to feel empathy, and I was honestly terrified of them. I was really lucky that I was working with a partner teacher who was extremely experienced, and we tried a number of things to try to get her to "follow the class rules". I think the moment that broke me though, was the moment I met this child's mother. The mother was kind and loving and trying her very best to teach morality to her child, even though she was very aware that her child had a personality disorder. I will never forget her determination to love and care for her child, even knowing that her child would never be able to love her back. I think back on that child now as a 10 year teacher and wonder where they are and how their life has gone. It also makes me wish all children had parents as loving as that child's were.

[@mckenzie.latham91]

The only way i've ever seen or heard of pyschopaths getting better or being able to treat their issues Was with some form of emotional or familiar support behind them

[@jadormycc8819]

@@mckenzie.latham91psychopath are born. Socialpath is from family or environment. Maybe a socialpath can be fixed, but not a psychopath.

[@pistol0grip0pump]

@18:30 - Also don't think I didn't see that shine through of a certain politician there 😅😂

[@DoctorElliottCarthy]

I wouldn't know what you're referring to... 😉

[@carrieels]

The impression was impressive 😂

[@wmdkitty]

We caught it, too. Well, I did. The cat wasn't in the room.

[@Brianna-eo8nu]

I remember watching a clip of this episode on KZbin. I have to give the writers and that young actress credit for how hate-able they made this kid. Seeing Doctor Fron get manipulated like that was so rage-inducing.

[@PrisonerOfReidsMind]

I hope you continue to follow Juliet's story throughout the show! It's good! Also Dr. Frome in general has a great storyline, IMO. (Who am I kidding, start at the beginning and just react to every single episode and Dr. Frome's cases!!! LOL)

[@thatweirdnigerianguy]

Learned a lot from this. That kid is a really good actress.

[@RubyMadigan]

Other shows have of course had their takes on psychopathy in children. Chicago med did it in the Season 1 episode Hearts. But I think a more interesting case would be in Law and Order SVU. There are several choices I could go with here but I think the best example would be a character named Henry Mesner. He first appears in the show at age 10 in the Season 14 episode 'Born Psychopath'. He returns in the Season 22 episode 'Post graduate psychopath'. The the first episode he ends up being institutionalised as a juvenile delinquent at least until he is 18. The second episode is what happens when he is 18 and has been released.

[@claireeyles7560]

I actually grew up knowing a 'psychopathic' child in the 1970s. Him and his brother were both adopted, his brother was in the same Primary school class as me, our families were close friends. His parents were aware of his issues and bent over backwards trying to get him help, absolutely none of which worked. It got to the stage where friends of the family were practically begging them to have him institutionalised (you could do that sort of thing back then) out of genuine concerns for the family's safety. We're talking about a child who tried to attack his then terminally mother with a large kitchen knife when he was 6 years. Things didn't really improve from there; before he'd reached the age of 10 he was torturing and killing small animals, setting fires, and suspected of being sexually inappropriate with much younger children. His family finally kicked him out and broke all ties with him when he was 16. He had sealed his father and brother inside their house, poured petrol around the outside, and tried to burn the house down with them in it. Thankfully neighbours intervened, and the fire brigade got their in time. Probably not surprisingly he was diagnosed with severe ASPD during one of his many, many trips to gaol, and has spent most of his adult life in and out of prison for pretty much every crime bar murder (unless he just hasn't been caught for that yet). I've never known anyone since who has had the sheer depth of cruelty, callousness, lack of remorse and zero empathy that this person displayed throughout his life. Terrifying, utterly terrifying.

[@TheoSwinford]

I would love to see you react to some Criminal Minds episodes! (If you need recommendations, I would suggest S2E11 "Sex, Birth, Death", S3E19 "Tabula Rasa", S4E02 "The Angel Maker", or S7E11 "True Genius") :)

[@nomadine85]

I watched the entire series and this was the most interesting storyline for me. This little actress was so good.

[@ElizabethWilson-nj6ol]

Id love for you to cover some more of new Amsterdam shows it's one of my favourites. Especially the episode with the conspiracy theroist and his son and the season 4 episode with the girl who's catatonic after a wedding

[@abbiezabbie1]

Please please do an episode on CPSD! I recently got a diagnosis, still trying to deal with the meaning, and looking back at my life and actions through a different lens. I got treated with dbt, but would love to hear your take on the diagnosis itself and the optional therapies we have today 😊

[@maraque16]

The yellow lego is back :O

[@DoctorElliottCarthy]

Eyes like a hawk!

[@Malekai2000]

YELLOW LEGO MAN has found his way home!!!! 🥰.... Oh, the Stories he could tell....

[@journalsbysophie]

They have to tell her parents about this "game" and that she won't ever have empathy otherwise how will they keep their son, themselves and others safe around her.

[@Bad_Place_Alone]

*PCLR* and I’m so happy this was given a close look. I’ve wondered what congenital psychopathy would look like in a pre-teen. Maybe this was a bit “theatrical” and “psychopath as genius”, but that aside... I wouldn’t know. It’s scary stuff. I did have a lengthy question I wanted to ask.

[@nope968]

Would love more reactions to new Amsterdam!

[@Lizzieissleeping]

The minimum age of criminal liability in Finland is 15 years. Pre-trial investigations into crimes committed by children under 15 years of age are closed automatically in the absence of criminal liability, which i think is insane

[@sofievadskr5012]

As a danish person who lives in Sweden with the same kind of laws as Finland around this issue, I disagree that this is insane. A childs mind is not fully developed and by the UN’s recommendations for the rights of children the age of criminal reliability should be 14-16 with an absolute minimum of 12. I would also like to add that while a child can not be criminally prosecuted in either denmark or sweden (and thus presumably also finland since we seem to follow the same rule), if a child under 15 commits a very violent crime it can be raised to the court, where although no sentencing can occur the guilt of the child will be determined to then involve social services and possible mental health services (even fines can be given for the child to pay in the future). This to me seems humane and commendable for the children, per studies done on the mental capabilities/development of children :)

[@learobinson4450]

@sofievadskr5012. What about what’s fair to the public who are put at risk by letting a violent child wander around free & go to school & go to the playground? You’d feel differently if a child with a history of violence severely harmed you or someone you love. If your child was attacked & hurt by a school mate who people knew was violent but nothing was done I’m fairly certain you’d want that child held accountable. How can kids learn that there are boundaries you just do not cross if they are never held accountable & punished when they cross that line? And others need to be protected from such kids. No one should be put at risk just because the laws don’t want to be bothered with violent children. And for the record I’m in the USA & I have a BA degree in Child Development. I have worked directly with children of all ages since 1985 in schools, daycares, preschools & as a private nanny. I’ve had to deal with violent kids on several occasions, one nearly killed one of my charges by dropping a heavy toy on her head from a balcony after he told her there was candy on the ground under it. He set her up so he could deliberately harm her. His dad dismissed it as horseplay as he always did when his son hurt others but that kid is now serving 25 years to life for attempted murder when he shot his drug dealer. If his parents & the courts had taken his violent behavior seriously when he was young a lot of innocent people would have been spared injuries & harm. Violent children should be held legally accountable by the courts which can order hospitalization & treatment & that protects innocents from them.

[@sofievadskr5012]

@@learobinson4450 They do face consequences that to me are appropriate for a child. They can get removed from their parents if it’s deemed that the parents are not capable of caring for the violet childs need. Like I also mentioned they will be followed by social services specialized in dealing children who break the law either for the rest of time until they turn 18 (and can then be punished to the full extent of the law which in the Scandinavian countries is still mainly focused on rehabilitation rather than punishment) or unless they are deemed to no longer be a threat to the public. To say they can not be bothered to deal with children is fundamentally misunderstanding the laws of these countries I believe. I personally think the low crime rates (some of the lowest rates in the world btw), especially the low crime rates for children, speak for the efficacy of a rehabilitation system for criminals rather than pure punishment. And yes I do acknowledge some can not be rehabilitated but so does the law here where we have indefinite imprisonment for prisoners and social services could also in theory institutionalize children when necessary but this is rare. But to me, and also most the Scandinavian population, we should not punish the ones who can be rehabilitated the same just in case they are the ones that can not be rehabilitated. This to me, especially goes for children who are not yet developed and still have time to develop :) (edited to add that children too can get indefinite institutionalization)

[@learobinson4450]

Social services is really gonna come in handy when the violent 12 year old is mercilessly attacking another child simply because the other child wouldn’t do what they wanted. Will social services jump in front of the teacher when the violent anti-social 10 year old hurls a chair at the teachers head? Social service can’t do anything to protect people when the psychopathic, anti social, narcissistic child who’s allowed out in society becomes violent. It’s illegal to harm another person except in self defense & the sooner violent kids learn this the better off everyone will be. The best way to teach violent kids that attacking & injuring others simply will not be tolerated is to come down on them hard & fast. Let the consequences of their actions be so severe that they’ll not repeat the actions. Something the social services rarely does. Here it’s generally referred to as “Nipping it in the bud”. Basically means you put a quick end to the problem through swift & severe consequences. People, especially children, rarely change their behavior until their behavior causes problems for them. A lot of things parents & teachers & social services do rarely makes misbehavior a problem for the child that’s misbehaving & that’s why it continues. Involving the legal system also removes responsibility for punishing the child from the parents so the child can’t blame the parents for the unpleasant consequences. There was kid in Florida who nearly beat a teachers aide to death after she tried to take away his video game. This kid had a long history of violence & had been diagnosed with every mental disorder under the sun. He had attacked his parents, other children & his teachers but no one ever involved law enforcement because of all the diagnosed mental disabilities. Social services developed a “plan” for him that didn’t do anything to protect those around him. After he nearly killed the teachers aide he went to prison & miraculously his behavior improved. It wasn’t perfect since he was written up for small infractions of the rules, but he was no longer violent towards others. It’s not hard to figure out why. For the first time he had swift & very unpleasant consequences for his behavior. Plus he’s now surrounded by men who can easily fight back & kick his rear if he tries anything with them. Amazing how being sent to prison with men who’d gladly beat him up if he tried his foolishness with them cured all his problems. He should have been sent there sooner & spared the teachers aide a lifetime of chronic pain from the injuries he inflicted on her. Social services was also involved with a little 5 year boy who stole his mother’s car & crashed it. They worked with his mother & school to develop & implement a plan since he had a history of “acting out” at school & home. Social services & their plan didn’t stop that boy from taking a gun to school & using it against his teacher, nearly killing her. Maybe it’s different in Scandinavia but here in the USA social services is practically useless. Far too often they are reactive instead of proactive. So in order to protect the public law enforcement needs to get involved & hold these violent children & their parents accountable.

[@thegreenmanofnorwich]

I would say "vanity" rather than narcissism. She may or may not be narcissistic, but I'd call it an appeal to vanity (I am a sucker for a compliment, myself, yet not a narcissist... I don't think, anyway) Punishment and treatment aren't the only options. If something is untreatable, but isn't really suitable for "punishment", then you could have something like "containment". In some ways, it's similar to punishment, but it doesn't accuse the person.

[@star.light-306]

so interesting, and really well explained.

[@5chq]

reacting to amy from gone girl would be cool!

[@wmdkitty]

Dude. I'm really high and _that yellow book is totally staring at you._ Off to binge watch "New Amsterdam", love, love, LOVE Jack Black.

[@amyrobinson7567]

Best episode ever - of both New Amsterdam and of Doctor Reacts. I really like these longer episodes. Super interesting. Thoughts on reacting to Wire in the Blood episodes? Or too niche of a show perhaps?

[@Zara_Brown]

Lol @18:31 a certain someone 😂😂

[@feliciasjoberg9886]

Using narcissism reminds me of Brooklyn nine-nine S5E14 where Jake breaks the narcissistisc dentist by saying his crime was a fluke, a stroke of luck and not brilliantly planned

[@Callimachus33]

18:30 For a moment i seriously thought you were doing a Trump impression

[@DoctorElliottCarthy]

I can't do the voice so I wouldn't dare...

[@wmdkitty]

@@DoctorElliottCarthy But you nailed the attitude!

[@SofiaPLikePhoenix]

I love your reactions of medical dramas 😊🤩

[@KSmeaton1]

If you haven't done so yet, please do an analyses of The Rain Man with Tom Cruise and Dustin Hoffman, featuring a character with ASD as well as Savant Syndrome.

[@tim4pele]

How exactly is the Hare Psychopathy Checklist administered? Is it simply as shown...just a checklist that the patient fills out? Is it more of a guideline used by the mental health professional to ask the questions in a more roundabout way? Is it filled out as a checklist and then "cross-referenced" with in-person observations by the mental health professional? I've always found it puzzling because if someone who exhibits high psychopathic traits is simply given that test in its "checklist" form, and they don't want anyone to know they're a psychopath, they'll just lie and give the answers they know will make them seem in a normal part of the psychopathy spectrum.

[@anamariavivas5402]

This was so good, there is a follow up episode. It will be great if you could make a video

[@drewmullett]

I'd love to know how the orange man would score on the psychopathy test. I feel it would be quite high

[@reysgotplans5005]

I remember binging this show when it first came out and this episode lives in ny head rent free 😶

[@osnatashtaralevin8944]

God.. now I really want you to react to Amos from _The Expanse_ ... It's just such a ethos of a show, I can't think of a singular episode that will showcase Amos, his (probably undiagnosed) social personality disorder _aaaand_ his coping mechanism

[@amylincolnrealagebeauty]

Hope springs eternal for a cure.... at the same time protect the victims.

[@ContrarianDC_KAF]

Yank here, great video as always. BTW, how is it possible you look younger as time goes by?

[@DoctorElliottCarthy]

Haha I shaved for once I my life. Maybe that's done the trick

[@mangantasy289]

yep, missing beard. Also, for whatever reason, I'm quite sure the video is a re-upload. I think I saw it before (or it was reaction to the same episode by another psych here on youtube)

[@pistol0grip0pump]

As far as psychopathy or antisocial personality disorder goes, has there been any significant/positive results from having them take psilocybin/psilocin or MDMA? That sounds like a really interesting avenue of research.

[@DoctorElliottCarthy]

No not yet though it wouldn't surprise if it's an avenue that's explored in years to come. It's hard enough to adequately study psychedelics in depression, let alone in an ASPD population

[@abbiezabbie1]

Based on very anecdotal evidence, my ex, who has anti social and narcissist tendencies, under MDMA would be able to really reflect on ways he's hurt me, and give what felt like a sincere apology. The problem was once the effect was over, he went back to his old behavior. Maybe if it was done within the bounds is therapy or would have given longer lasting effects...

[@sorenkazaren4659]

The problem. As I see it anyways. With psychopathy as a label is that psychopaths aren’t unintelligent. The negative connotations around the label and pervasive stigma associated with it means that any psychopath with the knowledge to know what it is, knows not to get themselves labeled as it. Can you really be so sure that the very low studies of psychopaths and psychopathy isn’t at least in part because it is very bad for a psychopath to get outed as such? Especially if they blend themselves into society semi successfully otherwise?(not for the sake of others but for the sake of themselves)

[@frank-bp1er]

My husband got me hooked on watching these videos (he's a psychiatrist too)

[@tomsautocadstudio6446]

The PCL r 2 quiz.

[@tonyburton419]

Well done, dude, was not aware of this 🤦‍♂

[@Here4Years]

I haven't watched vids for a while, only to find that Dr E has shaved his beard and is now Superman's younger brother!

[@Nagarath16]

Finally! I have waited for this reaction so long. \o/

[@AndyHoward]

stick to the rules even if you don't care about the consequences of breaking them: That is a Neutral Alignment (D&D): A Neutral character follows the rules that align with their own agenda, that are convenient to them, or they think are necessary. Neutral characters will usually follow the rules because they generally lead to a better outcome for them. However, they can break the rules if they believe the benefits to them outweigh the risks.

[@nekusakura6748]

You should check out the HIV focused Episode in Season 3 'The Legend of Howie Cournemeyer'.

[@amyrobinson7567]

What is the word that was used in this video for 'thinking about thinking"? Similar to metacognition.

[@stuartsmith8155]

This was a ride, thanks doc🙏

[@ThePapaya26]

Thank you for buying a new yellow Lego guy 😅

[@myridean2k4]

I recently saw a video that was featuring a program that introduced stray cats into medium security correctional institutions so that inmates can bond and take care of them. Is there perhaps a way to introduce cats/dogs under supervision to these children along with other treatment to help them develop empathy?

[@keelyandere4956]

I love her episodes in New amsterdam, she is so convincing

[@Christina-dz5qf]

Children can ABSOLUTELY be psychopaths.

[@AnneSchumacher-no]

Completely off topic. The yellow Lego man, where was it? Why is it back now? Is it okay. I have so many questions 😅

[@IAmFJ1]

What do you think about the book Sociopath: A Memoir by Patric Gagne. I saw an interview with the author, it seemed interesting but I'm not an expert, I don't know the things she says are real at all or exaggerated or scientific or not. The things she says are somewhat similar to your definition of their state of mind in this video and previous ones but it's scarier. She also agrees with you about the fact that people are reluctant about giving the diagnosis but in her experience it could help because then you don't feel alone in your thinking that maybe something's not right, it stops the confusion and opens the door to conversation.

[@Psychomech5]

The Hare checklist

[@cameronmonaghan6883]

I always saw 'psychopath' as hostile or aggressive with delusional outlook. It was Red Dwarf that I learned that a pschopath was someone who has no empathy. Not to do with the individual actions (persay) the episode is one I wouldn't mind seeing a reaction for. It's silly but does follow the definition. It's series 11 or 12 episode 1 Cured.

[@MrKiwiWilson]

bragging about being the biggest and best like Trump 'The biggest crowd I've ever spoken - I've spoken to the biggest crowds. Nobody's spoken to crowds bigger than me. If you look at Martin Luther King, when he did his speech - his great speech, and you look at ours, same real estate, same everything, same number of people, if not - we had more.'

[@TheoSwinford]

How could someone have EUPD and psychopathy? Don't psychopaths usually have limited emotional range whereas EUPD would require strong emotional responses, right?

[@keriezy]

The $10 sorry part is where you need to be a bit psychotic yourself to combat the attack. All the "sorries" weren't asked for. Her insults were only words. Why would you apologize if I didn't get upset? As for the spitting part. The lesson of 5 is quick and effective. Legit she would be holding her mouth.

[@SpaceMonkey15]

Have you considered checking out the anime Monster? There's some good stuff for you to analyze in there.

[@m4tt_314]

myanimelist.net/anime/19/Monster this one?

[@jthomann71]

There's a really good episode of Law & Order: Criminal Intent called "Blink" (season 2 episode 20) that deals with an interesting psychological condition I'd love to see your reaction to.

[@Rose_Blue87]

in the bit on 18:40 sounded like something donald trump would say if he would talk about playing games

[@Aikidjam]

@DoctorElliottCarthy : Is it possible to try and change the behavior of the child psychopath by reasoning on ethics ? Usibg ab utilitarian approach where the consequences for them of the long term would be bad : alienating their social circles, prison, loss of job or 'useful' relationships, even the risk of encountering other psychopaths who would react dangerously to their behavior ....

[@toramenor]

Very interesting

[@wheelofhands]

Is it the Hare Psychopathy Checklist? No. It's an acronym isn't it? I forgot. I've heard of it but can't remember. Edit: I remember! Is it PCL-R?

[@DoctorElliottCarthy]

Spot on

[@RedS0n]

While i was a fan of New Amsterdam overall, there was an episode or two that featured the NHS quite heavily, in what i believe to be a rather negative light, that, as a brit, I found rather insulting. It was in season 4, and i love to see your reation to how they dealt with it.

[@piarateking8094]

not just that it was negative but that they didnt really come at it from an understanding of what the actual issues of the nhs are, seems kinda ironic to paint the nhs the way they did when the show is about preserving a public hospital

[@cobracommander8133]

Somethings should be stigmatized. Psycopathy is one of those things.

[@Genin99]

What did you think of the chief psychiatrist?

[@TheIntimateAvenger]

There is one thing you said that I disagree with. You said punishment is about shame, but that’s not true. Punishment is about fear. Kids avoid doing the behavior you don’t want because they are afraid of being punished.

[@HelenCairns]

as far as I know, Psychopathy isn't a diagnosis in itself so there's not a tool to diagnose it?

[@shackielackie]

When I was an intern a few years back I had a girl in my class on a special education school who was just like this. Scariest thing ever. She acted exactly like those scary kids in a horror movie. She could give you the fakest 'nice' smile and say the most horrific things. She killed baby animals at her home without remorse and she would tell the teachers she could just lie about them hitting her so they would be in trouble. Nobody knew what to do with her. Even telling it now seems unbelievable. Straight out of a movie.

[@selim_ct]

I feel like getting smacked around would at least dampen these behaviours or am I wrong? Not advocating for violence but I’m just saying if o would have treated my brother this way I would have been smacked into tomorrow. And that’s how you learn not to do it again. 😅 this is more a joke than anything else but I would like your take on whether psychopaths can be conditioned this way

[@Lol1lol1Lol1lol]

That is not how the brain works.

[@xar226]

Not sure if he was going for it but man did I get Trump vibes around 18:40. Anyway, as far as psychopathy: If it is a distinct set of traits and challenges then it should have a distinct name and diagnosis -- even if one of those traits is "untreatable." Hopefully we find a way through in the future, but avoiding reality doesn't serve anybody.

[@pipersecretp3]

Tool of "observation" and "clinical interview."

[@boredutopia]

the most stupid thing parents always do is a protecting a seriously disturbing child and puting in danger whole household, whole classes, everyone around the disturbed child. my friend's mum was doing that until it came to a point he was 18, 2 meters tall and had over 100 kilograms.. he is schizophrenic and she saw signs her husband had littel by littel since he was in puberty, she done nothing, until it came to a point that he seriously injured and made handicapped for life 5 people.. the worst part was he would often say i think i am like my dad, i am not well, since the age of 14, she done nothing, until he become threat to her, than she done something.. i dont get such parents, you child is disturbed, is sick, mentaly ill, needs help, if they break an arm you take them to doctor, if they have flu you take them to doctor, why they do the opposite when their child do serious incident and is disturbed, why. i cant understand it. you are not helping them. they will grow up and it will be worse and worse with every new year until they will end on trial bench and locked in prison... and it could be prevented... this kid reminds me of my ex friend, he showed no remorse, no emotions, things would always go his way until all 3 of us were arrested. me and other kid got c ptsd diagnosis, while he was held in hospital for over a year and 2 of us had to do individual therapies for 6 months. the older he was the trail of crimes he done was pileing up. armed roberry, assualt, ra*e and last i heard he is in prison for next 20 years for rap*, se* abuse of a minor younger than 12 i think... i always knew something was seriously fu* up with him, i was scr* up at the time but i had emotions, knew right from wrong and often felt not doing what he wanted, but somehow i was always pulled into his gravitation field. he was a master of manipulation and guilt triping anyone...

[@learobinson4450]

I knew a violent kid whose dad always made excuses for him. It was just horseplay. Boys will be boys. He didn’t mean it, he was just a little too excited. Kid is now serving 25 years to life in state prison for attempted murder after a drug deal went bad & he started shooting. If his father had actually held him accountable for his bad behavior & gotten treatment for him like the mother wanted then maybe he would’ve had a productive life. Now he’ll either die in prison or get out & be 10x worse.

[@boredutopia]

​@@learobinson4450 i raised 2 kids, when i got custoy was in my early 30ties, they were 11 and 13 and were on their way to juvie, older one, younger one tofoster cre or orphange. so instead being cool uncel i had to become their father, coz of my sister's life choices and string of fuc*p men she brought in their life. always looking for her prince on white horse and always getting pregnant with each one and each one was worse than previous one. add to that i had to fight my own demons ( ,y whole family suffers from c ptsd since the war), pay attntion to seriously mentaly unstabile brother, alcholic father and mother who from atheist since the end of war become literaly alatar licker, nothing is more important than church, plus i am 100% handiccaped since 1993 when shell hited me, i was 11. so when social srvice asked me to take them in and what alternatives are, they both were dealing, messing with older boys, older one had a long list of breaking ins, stealing etc. i told them both in front of social worker it is gonna be as i say or you will go to juvie, your choice. took all off their electonics, consoles, cell phones, pc, tablets a said fix your grades and pass the class. they needed 6 months to get all stuff back. put paental control on every device, knew every message the sent r received, all sites they visited, every comment they ever made anywhere online, all e mails. i knew everything and pretended like i know nothing and never interviene unless i saw i should. but on a way i would start a topic of certain things. in less than 2 years they become excelent students, talked to me about everything, came to me for everything. i told them if they do something, i will not lay a finger to help them if it is conected to crime or any kind of behaviour wich will have legal concquences, but if it comes to that better to tell me by themsleves before i found out from someone else. honestly i have no clue how i managed to make them into decent human eings, both finished universeties, older one become fathr few months ago. younge one have 2 more years before he is done with uni. when my brother kill*d himself i talked to the about mental health, conditions , addictions, coz their fathers were both addicts andmy sister is an ex addict. they dont talk to her. i am their parent. kids need a parent, not a friend, not dictator and not a protector when they scr*w up, protector only for dangerous situations they can handel, like when younger one was constantly bothered by adult creep i knew and when i saw interaction i knew what is going on, he never ever approach my youngr nephew after i was done ''talking'' to him. younger one came out as bi at 16 and then at 20 as gay and i knew he is, was just waiting for him to figure it out and making small topic about that.. some people just do bad parenting and make wrong choices and scr* up their own kids for life instead nip it in the bud...

[@scriptorpaulina]

To be fair, I have autism and anxiety, and I think about hurting my family. I never would, (and I’m often horrified by these compulsions) but they are consistent. I guess the question is more helpful in context, but I feel like the questionnaire might catch a few too many hypoempathetic autistics

[@elmartell5724]

Maybe talk with a mental health professional about intrusive thoughts and OCD? The comorbidity with autism is fairly high, and something I struggle with.

[@randomname24680]

Hi, psychologist here ! I have 2 comments that could be helpful to you : - First about your thoughts of hurting others : they could be anxious thinking "did I accidently hurt them ? / what if I accidently hurt them ?", which is very common in social anxiety (which has a big commorbidity with autism). Those thoughts are usually ruminations and worries. They could also possibly be obsessive (and not compulsive), which is when an intrusive thought become so present it's bothering you. Sometimes these thought take the same form as the anxiety thoughts, sometimes it takes the form of mental images of violencd, or of a fear of impulsion "what if I suddenly felt the urge to hurt them and couldnt or wouldnt stop it ?". Those are typical of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Both of those types of thoughts have in common a lack of desire : the person is scared to hurt the other, and put in place behaviors to try to prevent it (which can be compulsive in the case of OCD). This is very different from what is described in the video where a person has a desire or an intent to hurt someone. It's not the presence of a violent thought that's the issue, it's how you feel about that thought and whether you align with it or not. Both social anxiety and OCD respond well to CBT. If you can access it, I would advise you to seek therapy, you might get rid of those desagreable thoughts in a few months. - about empathy issues : the video does explain the difference between cognitive empathy (I can mentally put myself in the place of the other and understand things from their perspective) and affective empathy (I can "feel" the emotions and the pain of others). Those are quite different. People with high psychopathy traits have high cognitive empathy and low affective empathy : the girl in the clip knows very well what people will think and feel if she says this or that, that's what makes her a great manipulator, but she doesn't feel the emotional pain of the person in front of her. People with autism usually have low cognitive empathy, but quite often have high affectice empathy, so the other way around. For exemple : I don't know why my factual comment on your new haircut uspets you but I see you're upset and that makes me feel very bad. So those are both pathologies that involve empathic difficulties, but it manifests in very different ways. And even though I'm not familiar with the assessment tools of psychopathy, I have no doubt the people trained to use them can easily distinguish psychopathic traits from autistic ones.

[@elmartell5724]

@randomname24680 Hi there! Great comment! Before I say what I'm about to, I'd like to acknowledge that you're the professional, clearly, and I'm just an expert on my own mind. People should absolutely listen to you over me. That being said, I do want to throw out a small caveat: CBT *can* be helpful to people with OCD, but, it can sometimes be harmful. I'm just going off my own experience here. People like me who have what my community calls, "Pure OCD" tend to have compulsive thoughts, and that can cause an issue when your brain takes the perfectly rational words of your therapist of say, "Well, you're in your thirties now- have you ever hurt anyone before?" and trigger the tendency of intrusive thoughts to escalate when face with what is very similar to reassurance. In me, it might look like, "Well plenty of people don't hurt someone the first time until later in life. Maybe I've just waited this long because I know I'm less likely to get caught the older I get. Maybe I'm just waiting until I have very good understanding of society and crimes and how to get away with them before I feel comfortable to finally do what I want." The nature of obsessive thoughts is that the harder up push against them, the harder they push back. Does that make any sense? If this is the case for anyone reading this, I HIGHLY recommend Exposure Response Prevention Therapy instead. ERPT looks much more like, "I am going to accept the possibility that I'm secretly a horrible person, and go be around other people anyway. I am going to accept that I may do something horrific (even though of course there's no reason to believe you would, obviously, but your brain physical can't care about that) and I'm going to trust myself anyway." It's the scariest thing I've ever done, and it works. Eventually, while you're doing the thing you're terrified to let yourself do, your brain gets bored of being scared, and your intrusive thoughts slowly lessen. Don't try to fight the thoughts, you'll lose every time. Let them and the terror wash over you fully, and then be brave and do the thing anyway. Best of luck to anyone reading this. Intrusive thoughts are hell, but they can get better.

[@randomname24680]

@@elmartell5724 exposure response prevention is part of CBT. It's effective but it's not the most effective tool actually. It works with some people, as it did for you, but not with others. What your therapist did (rationalizing thoughts) is also a part of CBT, but it's not at all adapted to OCD. It in fact can make people worse, as it's done for you. I'm guessing they had good intent but wasn't well informed an the best practice for OCD. This is a great exemple of how CBT is a tool box, nand not all tools are adapted to all issues. It's also a great exemple of the usefulness of a diagnosis. We're not going to treat an intrusive thought the same at all depending if it's based in anxiety, trauma or obsession : same symptom, different mechanism, different treatment.

[@crptpyr]

Yeah I have intrusive thoughts with my autism and low empathy, I have low affective empathy, used to have low cognitive empathy too but I had to start learning how to identify emotions in others when I was in high school because it made people hate me. Affective empathy is harder to "study" as such. At one point I thought I had to be some kind of psychopath or something, because people just don't wanna talk about low affective empathy in conditions other than cluster b disorders. It makes us look bad, because everyone associates it with "being evil", and others in the community will just deny our existence half the time because they don't want to look bad by association (how many times have I heard "low empathy is actually a stereotype, autistic people actually have a lot of empathy" lmao). I don't understand how empathy necessarily makes you a "good person" though at all, you can be compassionate or sympathetic without it. I don't want the people I like to be hurt, because that sucks for me whether or not it means I feel bad or not. It makes them unavailable to me in one way or another. Sure, that sounds kinda selfish, but at least I admit it. High empathy people are much more loathe to admit the inherent selfishness in helping others as a response to empathy ("you feel bad, which makes me feel bad, so I help you so that I no longer feel bad" doesn't sound all that selfless to me idk). It allows me to be harsher to people I don't care about, I guess, but people with normal empathy find ways around that all the time lmao. They manage to talk about people with low empathy like they're inhuman monsters that you should seek out and destroy, for instance. When I started to identify my issues with empathy for what they were and tried to do any research on it I was met with article after article on "how to armchair diagnose the people around you with low empathy disorder x and cut them out of your life forever". I just think it's a terrible indicator of morality and whether someone is a "good person" or not.

[@osnatashtaralevin8944]

With all due respect to _New Amsterdam,_ their Psychologist character, Iggy, is one of the worst therapists I've ever seen portrayed on TV, so many of his storylines revolve around him doing something judgy or with no empathy with his patients, I quite frankly couldn't watch the show anymore - I am not a therapist, but I've been in therapy and as a teacher I counseled a lot of children, his approach grates me - I much prefer Dr Charles from _Chicago Med_ - if you want to see a *healthy* and constructive representation of dealing and diagnosing a p.d child - see their episode from season 1 (I believe episode 14)

[@Varkhal218]

Personally, I find the concept of psychopathy bullshit. Not necessarily everything that makes up the concept, but the concept itself and how it is used. It takes together three main personality traits that are neither mutually-inclusive or mutually exclusive, and which themselves are labels that mean different things to different people in different eras. One of those traits is narcissism, which, to be fair, is pretty well-agreed upon what that means, but even then there are people who would claim that mere self-confidence and self-pride or even fantasies of grandeur are in themselves narcissistic even if the person they are talking about is not egomaniacal or constantly tries to appease their ego in relation to other people. Then there's the cold-bloodedness, or the callous-unemotional traits, like fearlessness, relative lack of emotional empathy, stress tolerance, less propensity for disgust and revulsion, courage, resistence to intimidation and willingness to enter into conflict and impose one's will. These are perhaps the factor that's likely most influenced by biology (although a lot of it probably has to do with life experience and how that shapes someone), but none of these are necessarily bad traits to have as they can manifest themselves in different ways to different people, and it doesn't mean that these people are incapable of forming genuine bonds and healthy relationships with others. Then there's sociopathy, or just social transgression, which is absolutely subjective to the places and eras in which people live, and it's even more subjective when you realise that people in general don't actually agree on what is considered right and wrong. The reasons we have many of the freedoms we have now is because past sociopaths of their time were willing to plot and conspire and bribe and kill and die and transgress the norms and rules of their society, so that for example today we aren't slaves or serfs that must bow down to a lord/master, a crown and a church. Even the name itself is stupid, and it historically got that name through a slippery-slope type of misuse of the word, which at first referred simply to mental pathologies in general. I'm not saying that people that the modern concept of "psychopathy" describes don't exist, on the contrary. We're 8 billion people, it's bound to happen almost. But to take an arbitrary grouping of 3 distinct personality and behavioural traits and use them as a kind of main reference point or the be-all end-all for the study of social transgression which in itself is a complex phenomenon encompassing a great deal of different, sometimes mutually-exclusive things, is incredibly misguided in my opinion. What if I have some cold-blooded traits and engage in some forms of social transgression but I'm not narcissistic? What am I, a quasi-psychopath? A different, under-researched type of sociopath?

[@eatsmylifeYT]

DSM

[@AndyHoward]

What was she mouthing?

[@badatlettingo]

"I win"

[@AndyHoward]

@@badatlettingo Thank you. Not a good lip reader

[@badatlettingo]

@@AndyHoward you're welcome 😊

[@Kno_Buddy]

You should try reacting to music, I really think you’d enjoy it and there is a lot less editing that has to be done. I might suggest Hip-Hop as a first attempt and I believe you would enjoy a sub-genre known as Conscious Rap which is about every day trials and tribulations instead of the stereotypical braggadocios songs people think of when they think of Hip-Hop there is also a lot of stuff relevant to mental health in there with artists like EMINEM, Royce Da 5’9, Tech N9ne, Hopsin, Logic, Joyner Lucas, Kendrick Lamar, and many others.

[@lensenstark9819]

I really liked your beard

[@elmartell5724]

Was that an intentional Trump impersonation I wonder, or is the Orange just that much of a model narcissist?

[@19Paul91]

@18:30 hello Trump!

[@wheelofhands]

🎉 First?🎉

[@godzillaprime]

I think the way people react to basic words these days is... insane

[@Thumbnail.designer.1]

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[@brendanmch998]

Just curious if a deceptive person is naturally deceptive by nature Wouldn’t it be difficult to get a more accurate picture from their responses to the questions on the psychopathy checklist?