Does a Person with Dementia Know They Have It?

Alzheimer's medical expert, Doctor Antuono shares his expertise on dementia. Please visit our website for more information on memory loss: bit.ly/18UMHpQ

[@Leosarebetter]

My Mum was deep in her dementia - i got a phone call one day where my Mum was telling me that she was losing her mind and would I please tell my brothers. She was 100% aware and alert in that conversation of just a few minutes. I rang back 20 minutes later and she had no idea that she had even called. Mum died about 12 months after that call from dementia. For those few moments she knew she was trapped, what was happening and all she could think about was her family. Miss you Mum.

[@Gizziiusa]

yeah, it seems like she became temp. -consonant- cognizant of her own mind "permanently malfunctioning" and did one last "plz let everyone know im slipping away mentally", instead of help me. RIP

[@brendanolasco2214]

My Mother definitely knew she was losing it. She would sometimes blurt out, “I hate this”. It was frustrating for all involved to keep their patience as she struggled to find the words she was trying to speak. She was always very sharp, active and intelligent. What she hit 80 years of age she would get upset that she no longer knew how to play the piano. Maybe she did not know it was dementia but she definitely lived her remaining years angry and depressed because she was aware of her shortcomings. She hated needing anyone to do things for her but lost her ability to even feed herself or walk. Maybe some people do not realize after a while that there is something wrong but I know some do know they are losing it. There is a misconception that all people with dementia are pleasantly confused. After being a nurse with direct patient care for over 15 years I can say most are not pleasantly anything. My biggest fear is to become demented.

[@deagle2yadome696]

RIP

[@cacatr4495]

@@Gizziiusa Did you mean *_cognizant?_*

[@Gizziiusa]

I did, I did. Truth be said, spelling definitely isnt my forte. I think when the spell cherker word list came up, I accidently picked the wrong one. ha. oh well. thx for the laugh.@@cacatr4495

[@purpellnurpell8095]

I used to care for an elderly man with dementia. I told him a joke one day and he laughed and told me to tell him the same joke tomorrow because he won’t remember it 😂 He was the best ❤

[@strngmgc]

and did you??

[@MellouwMusic]

@@strngmgcNo. He died 3 hours later

[@89kilemal]

​@@MellouwMusicJesus lol

[@margaretr5701]

Glad he had you in his life, as you made him laugh. I expect you were with him when he passed.

[@wontstopjoc]

I think that could’ve been Terminal Lucidity

[@kittywalker2944]

They know, until they forget. At first, they realize what is happening.

[@vivimaze]

My grandmother knew. She'd had a monumental intellect, she had been an academic and a professor, and losing her mind was her living hell. It was so obvious she knew

[@HockeyWerewolf]

I'm so sorry to hear that, that sounds horrible.

[@jdtown6585]

So horrible when you know, yet your are helpless in doing anything about it.

[@jdtown6585]

@@temperedglass1130Weird ass comment of the day.

[@kathleendavidson3316]

@@temperedglass1130 how the hell would you know this? Anyone who read the above comment would know she'd been there.

[@wobinich2009]

@@kathleendavidson3316 its a troll, best to just ignore it.

[@ew7512]

My beloved dad has dementia. In his case, it's accurate to say that he has absolutely no idea of the magnitude of the problem. He still feels as if he is completely normal and is utterly unable to grasp how he has changed, how it has impacted our lives, why he needs assistance. I don't say this cruelly at all; it's a signature of the disease, for him, and not his fault in any way. I'm even grateful for it; he was a brilliant professor and researcher and would be horrified if he could understand all he's lost.

[@SerMattzio]

This is what annoys me when people say "Use it or lose it" with regard to the brain/dementia. Many very intelligent people suffer with it. I'm sure in the future people will look back and that sort of attitude will be seen as ignorant. Best wishes for your dad.

[@ew7512]

@@SerMattzio Thank you for that. I had tricked myself into thinking he was protected from dementia, because he had an intellectually rigorous job into his 70s. He read voraciously - and challenging stuff, like the complete works of Shakespeare - and did the NYT weekend crosswords in pen. He was a lifelong runner in excellent shape. But it got him anyway, and now he sits in memory care with little left of who he was. It's an ugly disease.

[@richhornie7000]

I'm somewhat glad that he can still feel normal despite the condition. I think it's something one is better off being ignorant about.

[@ew7512]

@@richhornie7000 I agree. He would be mortified, embarrassed, and deeply sad if he knew.

did he smoke weed behind your back?@@ew7512

[@oldmanwood5011]

My dad had vascular dementia for five and a half years. Much of the time he wasn't aware of it, but now and then would have moments of clarity where he would say "I'm just crazy as hell, aren't I?".

[@lynnetrathen4587]

They know and one of the saddest parts about it is when they have the occasional clarity and realise what’s happening to them 😢😢

[@noodle_Cx]

I work in a restaurant that's inside a care home and one of the elderly with dementia sometimes talks about his childhood friends and family in great detail, specifically talking about how nice it is to have everyone together and hes excited for Christmas. I can tell when he's having bad days because he talks like that. It's when he misses people and I believe he knows something is wrong but doesn't have the words to say it. I like sitting with him in the restaurant and listening to his rambles because I know he appreciates that. The work can wait in those moments.

[@scottishmamalivingingodslight]

Do they know, yes they know - my Mother sat repeating the names of me and my children over and over again to herself, desperate to cling to them and that was before she even had her diagnosis. Dementia is the most heartbreaking disease- death by 1000 paper cuts!

[@CastleHassall]

that is so sad.. i hope you can have good things happen that help heal the sadness now

[@scottishmamalivingingodslight]

@@CastleHassall thank you got your kind reply, I am incredibly blessed with a wonderful husband and two amazing teenagers. As well as two crazy dogs. Mum passed two years ago this coming Saturday, I believe time is a healer, and God is gracious - it is the fun memories of Mum that I think of more than the sad ones.

[@BigButtocks967]

In my experience the saddest part of dementia was the fleeting lucid moments when she knew she had it and was 90% her again then the fear of knowing she would be gone again soon.

[@667crash]

Yes! My wife had it and never forgot till the day she died at 81. Dementia has a variety of symptoms and effects. There is no absolute consistent pattern.

[@user-ks7pb5yj4n]

I play music at Assisted Living homes and most of the residents in dementia care are happy. It's the loved ones that suffer. It's made me realize the present moment is all we have anyways and they are not suffering like we think. ❤

[@davidholmes2283]

I remember when my father said to me "good God you know more about me than I do". He was really upset but forgot about it shortly afterwards. It's a very cruel illness. He didn't know I was his son for the last three years of his life.

maybe you weren't his son after all

[@davidholmes2283]

@ What a pointless comment.

@@davidholmes2283 cope

[@jmckendry84]

​@don't be a dickhead.

[@Xeyedjohn]

@@davidholmes2283 yes pointless and most ignorant, what a sad life they must have. Thank you for sharing your experience with this illness.

[@pdvision2194]

Sure its unsettling to everyone else, but it is a little comforting to know they are unaware for the most part. Ignorance is bliss.

[@fenlandhobbit2307]

Both my parents ended up having dementia. I left work to look after both of them for as long as I could 24/7 for just over 2 1/2 years. In answer to the question it is a definite yes. My dad had no idea , my mum did. I was told that there are so many types of dementia , so I guess it depends on which part of the brain degrades first. My dad had Alzheimers first , it was slow to progress so i was working and sharing the care with my mum. Dad had needed help for years with other health problems .. Then mum began to show symptoms. The very first one was when she couldn't read the time on an analogue clock. My dad's first symptom was with maths. On the household finances he would start to add instead of subtracting . It was very subtle to begin with. So I did what any person that loves their parents would do (because I'm certainly not special in anyway) I left work to care for them both It was strange how differently it effected both of them over time I'm 62 now and never regreted it. My thoughts go to anyone that has a close family member or friend suffering from it. Take care ❤🇬🇧

[@MultiDringus]

It will happen to you too bro

[@fenlandhobbit2307]

@MultiDringus the chances are reasonably high because my nan had it (on my dads side). I guess it's the luck of the draw. At the moment, I'm working and have had tests plus CT scan, so all is good for now. I dont worry about it, but I'm aware and mindful of what may happen .

[@2020HotShotTruckingLLC]

My Mom passed last year at 86. I had her with me for nearly 5 years and like you, I quit my job to care for her. She always said she never wanted to be in a nursing home, and as a food service technician I have been in many nursing home kitchens... so there was no way she was going there. She put up with me as a brat child and rebellious teenager for 19 years, so what's a mere 5 years for me to care for her? Sure, the Mom I knew and loved was long gone, but she was still my Mom. And I was so happy that she always remembered who I was. Two days before she passed, my brother drove down to see her and thankfully she remembered him. We were spared that ugly side of dementia. Oh, and I'm 62 also... must be the way our parents raised us. Honor they Father and Mother so that it may be well with you!

[@fenlandhobbit2307]

@2020HotShotTruckingLLC that's why I made a point that I'm not special in any way. There are thousands of lovely people out there caring for loved ones . You did a wonderful job you should be proud . For myself, my father had to go into care for the last year and a bit. It broke my heart tbh. I'm not very tall and dad was 6ft tall. He had forgotten who I was and was showing signs of aggression as well as challenging toilet habits . He was an ex Royal Marine and though frail looking still extremely strong . He was put in a care home about a minutes drive from where I live Mum was OK until the palliative care so for the last two weeks mum was put in the same care home as my dad . Two weeks shy of my parents 60th wedding anniversary my mum passed away. Dad was taken through to see mum but he said he never knew the women and was never married . I did my best for as long as I could caring but the Dr stepped in and made the choice for me about the care . I'm like you with regards to care homes but I guess I was at the limit of what I could do. Mum passed two weeks after leaving home. The very last thing my mum said to me while being taken to the ambulance , well she shouted it at me , "I hate you!! Those were the last words she ever spoke to me before she passed away. It plays on my mind nearly everyday and it's been 11 years. If I could have done more I really would have. Just to mention my mum was 16st and bed ridden now. Though an electric hospital bed had been put in the bedroom it was not big enough for a lifting harness. So the care home was advised by the Dr for the palliative care. I wish you well for the future , take care 🙂

[@alsaunders7805]

I was my mother's live in caretaker for the last few years. She had pancreatic cancer and dementia. The 3 year gap in my employment record is proving challenging with returning to work. Few online applications (that's what everyone uses now) provide a way to explain such things. 😢🤔🤓🍻

[@El3m3ntalDragon]

Terrifying.

[@sp317]

They may have some awareness of it in the early stages, but they mercifully do not later. My dad has dementia and on a rare occasion he’ll have a lucid moment when he realizes there’s something wrong with him, and it’s so painful to witness that I would rather he remained in the fog of forgetfulness. There are blessings to even forgetfulness.

[@yippee8570]

My MIL in late stage vascular dementia used to say "me 'ead in't right" and wave her hand by her scalp. She definitely knew.

[@Drayran]

I remember very well the pained look my grandpa had when he realized that whatever he said missed the point and was wrong. Terrible to see the decay. At least the self-realization ceased at a certain point, making things more bearable for him (is what I hope).

[@The_DC_Kid]

I'm 73 and have had a very well developed sense of humor my entire life. My wife of 39 years apparently just noticed that and now says she's worried abut me having dementia bc I laugh at "inappropriate" times and things. She mumbles a lot but says it's my fault I don't understand her bc I have "bad hearing", and she's getting more forgetful and often repeats herself but I dare not mention those for fear of her flying off the handle AGAIN. Her Dad died of Parkinson's Disease and had accompanying dementia that grew worse as time went by, and in the onset had increasing unsteadiness in his walking and stepping up onto curbs (he fell at least 4 times). In the past 10 years Wifey has fallen 3 or more times that I know of. She wants me to get tested by my doctor for dementia but when I say I will if she also gets tested she changes the subject. I see 4 or 5 symptoms or markers in her for getting dementia but she continues to talk about the possibility of ME having it. One more thing is that I exercise, even now, but she hasn't since High School bc she's always been somewhat overweight and so chooses not. The only good thing in her family's health history is that her Mom, aged 95, is still walking around although she's getting noticeably slower and weaker.

[@lucaadesigns]

have a good day! 🙏

[@realme-tq4cq]

@@lucaadesignswtf lol

[@realme-tq4cq]

Your profile name makes me think you’re lying.

[@danpierce8862]

​@@realme-tq4cqwhat are you talking about?! Thats our president Joe Biden! Whats up mr. Prez

[@overkillblackjack2910]

Sir, I hope you have or can access some support, either personal or professional...Maybe you COULD go to your local CENTER ON AGING or whatnot, get checked out with your wife in the waiting room, and then rave about how great and friendly the doctor was. Then maybe go back with her for lunch at the CENTER on another day. Eventually you could maybe do social things together there as a couple, and maybe on one of those days they will offer a free screening that she may do. The preceding is just a rough plan, but the point is to lovingly, and without her knowing, keep putting her in a position to eventually get evaluated.

[@mplslawnguy3389]

My dad has had something going on for about 15 years. They can’t definitively diagnose it, but it’s some form of dementia. I don’t have the same dad anymore and haven’t for a long time. It took a long time for us to adjust to the new normal, but once you do it’s better. It’s so easy to get angry in the early stages, but you can’t get angry at the person, even when they do really infuriating things. It’s the disease, not the person.

[@gavinvalentino6002]

Plot twist: he's beem hiding a secret from you all along: he's not your real father.

[@kit4616]

@@gavinvalentino6002 What a revolting thing to say. What if your own mother develops dementia? Would you like it if some stranger made some snarky comment about how maybe she isn't really ill?? Grow up.

[@LoveLeeMeJenny]

My x's grandma had advanced dementia, more than 99% of the time she was completely gone and you couldn't let her out of your sight for even a minute (she was still somewhat mobile, but could not dress herself or eat on her own). Then once in a rare while her mind became crystal clear and it was very obvious that she was painfully aware of what was going on. This is why I'm terrified of me or my loved ones developing dementia, you can most definitely be aware that you're trapped inside a malfunctioning brain. It must be a nightmare.

[@BadThrusher]

Sounds insensitive but the best for them is to rest rather than live an empty life

[@vivrowe2763]

Yes, my father knew his memory was failing, and I was the first person he told. I loved and miss my father and I went and saw him 5 days a week.

[@lmb1962]

My mom, 98, started earlier this year. She cannot retain anything. I think it was precipitated by my father's passing away two years ago. He was 10 years younger; he was her rock, married for 64 years. I have stopped working to be with her, thank you, hubby, but I have come to the realization that I will never measure up to him. Miss you, dad. I'm there for you, mom.

[@randygreen007]

I have to disagree that they’re not “impacted with the magnitude of the problem”. Yes they start to realize what’s happening then in most cases they learn how to hide it. Once it becomes more apparent to family and friends that they are experiencing it they definitely get depressed but that depression is usually replaced with anger then in some cases combative behavior. I was my mother’s sole care provider for the 10 years she was experiencing Alzheimer’s disease so I went through all the stages with her. The only thing that stopped the combative behavior was very small, micro doses of edible cannabis. After a few days of treatment with it she forgot all about the problems of having Alzheimer’s and learned to enjoy, for the most part, her new life. Mom passed away comfortably in her own home and bed with me holding her and singing “you are my sunshine” gently into her ear. That was the hardest yet most beautiful thing I’ve ever experienced. If that makes sense. Just knowing she was happy and comfortable as she passed was priceless.

[@michele21auntiem]

So sorry but also thankful the edibles helped. They helped my hubby for a year or so. And I know he ate better. But he can't tolerate them now because of other health problems. He has gotten worse to where most times he doesn't get angry now.

[@lmb1962]

Tears rolling down my face. Ten years is a long time. I'm caring for mom now, who is 98, no combative behavior on her part so far. Thank you for your advice. If it comes to that point, I will try and remember it.

[@lynstuder3182]

You are an awesome daughter.

[@silverdrillpickle7596]

@@lynstuder3182 Excellent comment; agree fully.

[@sandratrujillo9213]

Can you tell me what kind of edible? Chocolate, gummy, or I took care of my dad until he passed away in 2020 and now it's starting to happen with my mom who's 85 She knows what's happening and she drinks and gets violent sometimes I'd love to give her something to relax. She also refuses to see a doctor 😢 You are an awesome daughter

[@Toshiro_Mifune]

Finally, a video with a question in the title, that answers it IMMEDIATELY! I am so happy.....

[@bettyboop3353]

I asked my doctor who is a psychiatrist if he thinks I have dementia. He looked me straight in my eyes and said if I had dementia or Alzheimer’s I would not know it. There would be someone else asking the question. In a way I felt better not knowing that I was going crazy so to speak. I have made sure both my husband and son understand what they might see me do. My son is my POA I’m sure he will make decisions based on what he thinks I would choose. We have had many discussions on several issues. The point is that he understands as well as he can what I would choose in each situation. Have made it clear that I would never blame him for anything he decides to do.

[@EmilyTienne]

I’m surprised this doc would say that. Maybe he was just trying to allay your fears. But dementia is seldom a sudden manifestation. It starts out slowly, and during this transition period, of course the sufferer is cognizant enough to pick up on clues.

[@tzenophile]

@@EmilyTienne unfortunately yes. My mom cared for her mom, and of course she recognized the same symptoms, 35 years later. She would not admit them, and fought hard to repress them, but she did know, and it must have been pure torture. Genetically, this is Russian Roulette.

[@islandbirdw]

As a nurse for more than 30 years, I would argue that a person with dementia often feel afraid, some withdraw and others get agitated. I believe deep down inside they understand they’re failing. They say find out about the persons life who and what they were prior to getting dementia and this will give them great comfort, keeping the agitated person calmer. One example a woman had been a childcare expert and they gave her a doll she could hold, that kind of thing helped keep them calm. I think the agitated ones sense they don’t know what to do and I believe this causes some to feel they need to escape. They don’t recognize where they are and seem desperate to find what feels familiar.

[@jaytc3218]

My mom had early onset dementia. She was the one who told us after she was diagnosed with it. There were a few times when she would tell us something and later forget that she told us. And the reverse also happened; she would tell us something and I would bring it up later in conversation and she would say, "I never said that." But that was as far as it went. She never forgot who anyone was and she could still pay bills and manage her household business. She did tell us that she felt like she should probably stop driving and she sold her car. She had several other health problems as well. For her, the dementia never became more advanced due to the fact that she passed way from her other problems. So the fact that she was able to maintain a relatively high level of cognitive function was important to her and we were also happy that we were able to be fully present with her up until the last.

[@MWorsa]

My Mom had early onset Alzheimer’s, she 💯 knew she was losing her mind in the beginning, it was terrifying and then it got worse. Miss you Mom ❤.

[@vampiresquid]

Yep, my mother knew she had dementia early on, was fully aware something was horribly and progressively wrong and was terrified by it. In that stage she was very forgetful, but still had no trouble recognizing family. As things progressed to the middle stages, though, she lost insight. At that point her recognition of us was on-and-off, and she'd tell us about strangers she had seen in the house, who of course were just us. At that point, you could no longer tell her that there was anything seriously wrong with her. She thought everything was just fine, except for all those strangers coming into her house.

[@josefperry3836]

As a film maker I've sat in on scores of interviews with dementia patients and their doctors. It has struck me how resigned most were to a dementia diagnosis. They seemed to know they were in bad shape. Of course, they were all in the early stages of the disease. I anticipate some day entering the gate myself, since both my parents were diagnosed with different expressions of the disease in their latter years.

[@overkillblackjack2910]

Please check out things you can do for yourself to positively impact your brain, such as challenging mental activities, humor?, etc.

[@lv4077]

I’ve found that.admitting to serious mental illness and a total lack of rational thought isn’t all that helpful when confronted by an IRS audit.

[@JT_70]

Both my parents had/have it so I may be doomed as well. Mom’s still around at age 92 but usually doesn’t recognize me even though I visit with her 3-4 times a week. She is usually unable to make a sensible sentence.. It’s an insidious disease.

[@overkillblackjack2910]

@@JT_70 there are probably some things you can do even if you genetically have it from both parents. Maybe visit with a neurologist or someone similar?

[@pantac4493]

@@overkillblackjack2910 it only marginally improves function, the disease is impossible to prevent until they learn more and have better treatment

[@leahwhiteley5164]

My Dad had dementia in his 90's. It wasn't bad. He always knew where he was, who people were but he got so paranoid and ornery. He was always mad and didn't know why, but had no problem taking it out on me. I couldn't do anything right. He would sit at the kitchen table all day. I would arrive in the morning, say hello. He refused to speak to me. I brought groceries, cleaned, did his laundry, etc. He didnt speak to me all day. The minute I gathered my things and went to the door he'd mumble something. Trying to get me back into the kitchen. Then he say something dumb like about the weather. I finally got mad and told him he had all day to speak to me and now when I was tired and needed to go cook my supper he didn't want me to go. He'd get mad again. I finally got to the point I'd just leave when he started that. He also would refuse to answer the phone when O called to check on him. One day I called 8 times and he dixnt answer. So I had to drive over there and he was sitting in the kitchen 2 feet from the phone. Where were you all day? Right here. Why didn't you answer the phone? It didn't ring. 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

[@Wooster23]

I'm sorry man. It's really hard. My uncle had dementia in his 80s. He was always a sweet and kindly man, but it changed and twisted his personality completely. I have to remind myself constantly that the anger and bitterness he had at the end wasn't him, it was the disease.

[@BigDaddySwingingMeat]

That's actually a specific form of dementia called "Agitation Dementia" where they get very mean and angry. Sometimes it requires a professional caretaker but I heard they now make medication to treat it. Sometimes they just have to dope these old folks up with "happy pills".

[@mohannadali9662]

It really wasn't him. Even if he was aware of it, it wasn't him.

[@louiseeckert1574]

I’m sorry to hear your account... My mother was a v nasty, controlling, vicious narcissist all her life. But when she got to a certain point in the dementia, she suddenly changed into a fairly calm, placid person. Periodically I see the ballistic, searing rage and hatred trying to lash forth at me, but because she can’t put it into words, she seems to forget before she can vent it. All her OCD’s, eating disorders, phobias and mental health issues have drained away. LouiseAustralia 🦘

[@trucid2]

@@mohannadali9662 It was him.

[@dontreadtoomuchintomycomment]

My grandmother, 82, seems to be coherent 92% of the time but, I've come to realize she's not in the same reality as us.

[@TheFakeyCakeMaker]

Of course they do. One of the last lucid conversations i had with my gran she said "i forget things you know?" ❤ Miss you granny ❤

[@papasmurf5598]

They forget that they are forgetting. I will personally take my own life if I recognize I have early stages of dementia. Why, because I watched my mother struggle with it as she was eventually diagnosed with the latter stage, which is Alzheimer's. last 6 years she sat at home and watched TV and slept in a chair in the living room. she wouldn't take advice about anything because she couldn't understand anything anymore. you had to just watch her and listen. don't try to correct them because they will get angry and confused. my personal opinion was that she was just waiting to die, and we had to watch it happen and it was not pleasant at all. last 4 years she didn't know who we were except for that we would be there for her to talk to if she wanted to. she only would eat salads for the last 3 years and lost massive weight and you couldn't force her to eat anything else. she would make up excuses for not eating other stuff. she eventually starved herself to death and couldn't stand up anymore and we put her in her bed for the last time and she lasted 5 days and died. Hospice was there to assist us off and on for the last 2 years. it took a big toll on all of us and so that's why I personally would rather do it different myself. if I have the mental capacity to know I'm losing it I will get my finances together, give everything away and have a will made up and say goodbye and get it done myself. knowing what I would face and the trauma of what my family would have to endure it makes since to me.

[@MrTruckerf]

I agree with you. I have seen what it does to the family and I won't put them through that.

[@lynnattwood1716]

That's very selfless of you, I'm sat here looking at my mum who has dementia, you describe very similar things you had to deal with. She watches tv and knits and knits and knits endless lengths of knitting...I also have a disabled sister to take care of with help of carers, I also have support from carers with mum at this point but soon she will need 24/7 care. I also look after my mother in law of 95 who has just had a stroke along with my husband who has recently had heart failure. I don't feel its a burden to look after them however, we are all different and cope with situations differently, your family may feel that having you around is better than the alternative. All the best to you.

[@papasmurf5598]

@@lynnattwood1716 I’m sorry you’re having to take on all that responsibility. It’s tough and I imagine you’re not a young person anymore yourself. Don’t get overwhelmed and look for alternatives for help. I read what you said about me being selfish if I choose to end my life if I get this dreadful disease. I’m single and never married with no kids. I only have one sister who did most of the hard work looking after my Mother before she died and I told her I will never go out that way. She looked at me and knew what I meant and just said she loved me and that she wouldn’t blame me if that was my decision. My sister had to endure my mother’s anger at taking her finances away from her because she was getting ripped off by scammers and so my sister got power of attorney to protect her. Also had to take her Car away and she became so angry and confused. I will most likely outlive my sister because of her own health issues, so it will be me by myself. I’m not religious either so don’t have that head trip to stress about.

[@tzenophile]

@@papasmurf5598 She(?) actually said selfless not selfish. For what it is worth, we're all in this together, just thousands of miles apart. It's hard and that is that, but we are many.

[@papasmurf5598]

@@tzenophile Yes, you’re right. My bad.

[@adb888]

A living death that's probably more terrifying to most than actual death...

[@presauced]

Straight to the point.

[@michaelterry1000]

In my experience, certainly in the beginning. They will often tell you over and over again that they can not remember things. In the beginning the difference between long term and short term memory becomes dramatic. They can tell you in detail of an event of their childhood or early adulthood but can't tell you who it was that just walked out of the room.

[@alanratay4583]

My mother-in-law has dementia pretty bad. One day she called my wife 17 times. Literally. At first she was very upset because she knew something was wrong. It also doesn’t help that my father-in-law is extremely impatient and yells at her when we have to answer the same question over and over. Just act like it’s brand new. Be patient. They cannot help it.

[@labab1048]

My Dad didn’t show signs of dementia until his mid 80’s. It was vascular dementia, and would somewhat come and go so to speak. He was aware when it would settle over him like a mist. He would look at us and tap the side of his temple and say “I got nothin’”…and we would reassure him that we had his back. Other times he would become irritated, combative…we just always tried to reassure, and redirect. He died at 87 from congestive heart failure, and had a host of other health problems. He fought hard❤

[@Padoinky]

From my experience w/ my mom (AZ), she knew she was declining cognitively, and it was heartbreaking to watch her catch herself getting frustrated at not being able to do something and at the same time, her being aware of her inability to do, what at that time, she could still recall having previously done… Thereafter, once she couldn’t recall that she could previously do some thing, her frustration declined, but for those of us around her, it was just as heartbreaking to now know she has further deteriorated… cognitive decline is something I do not want to live through… 🙏

[@lv4077]

I really began to notice my serious mental deterioration and severe lack of reason and judgment after my second divorce.

[@mohannadali9662]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/qWOyc6Z_adanrtEsi=ybo9dXk4XI2n9NOw

[@kathleendavidson3316]

I remember sitting beside my Nana and handing her my family photos, back in the days when we bought physical pictures that came in a paper envelope. She went through those 24 pictures once, then twice, and was part way through her third time when she announced the stack was too long and she couldn't possibly read them all. She absolutely loved to read and knit and stopped both. She also had a major stroke (which definitely contributed). She never said anything about her memory, as far as I know, but she would burst into tears randomly so she definitely wasn't happy. She was with family when she died. I still miss her.

[@wyleecoyotee4252]

My mom had one lucid moment where she apologized and cried that i had to deal with it. Otherwise i don't think she knew. She also had terminal cancer at the same time and may have lessened the reality of it.

[@briandeschene8424]

Since self-awareness is a meta-cognitive function (i.e.: knowing that you know), I cannot see it being a yes/no binary state. What I have witnessed with several relatives/in-laws is repeated realizations. Realizing over and over again that you have deteriorated mentally. Realizing that you already ate because the dirty dishes are still in the table at your “spot”. Dealing again with the fact someone you know/knew is dead. I think the repetitive emotional looping is the cruelest aspect. It would be so much easier emotionally if *bang* you just forgot everything and stayed that way. I wonder if that’s why so many “experts” say that’s the way it works because they are just placating themselves and/or those they serve with a comfortable platitude.

[@Lochlann13]

My great Aunt has dementia, and will happily tell anyone who will listen that she has dementia. Within a few minutes to a few hours, she will have forgotten that she's told you, and just as happily tell you again. That's the shiny side of it. The darker side is that she often feels completely fine, and will try to do things that are very likely to hurt her, such as cooking, driving, or going for a walk. She knows she has dementia, and she knows the name for it, but her mind has no concept of what it actually is anymore.

[@Bri-254]

Thats exactly what happended with my mother,She knew what would happen progressively as she was a nurse herself.

[@tdpunduerat]

7 years and only 3 comments on such a debilitating condition r.i.p. mom xo

[@The_DC_Kid]

I'm pretty sure this isn't the only platform on which dementia is discussed and in more lengthy and detailed posts, so there's that.

[@DMZBestPlays-yt8ei]

x sorry for your loss

[@RobertsGrant]

Good video post, short and to the point.

[@evanmoore3114]

My grandad has Alzheimer’s and hasn’t had a truly lucid moment in years. The most recent of those was when he looked up at my Mom and said “I can remember my third grade class perfectly, but I can’t remember yesterday.” Now he has no idea, though.

[@neuro9116]

Oh god that is scary

[@foghornleghorn8536]

At the first hint of dementia I'm checking out. There is no way I'm going to live like that.

[@michellewood5905]

My husband is 64 diagnosed in 2020. Knows he should know thing that are just not there. Lots of frustration and anger at those times.

[@mohannadali9662]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/qWOyc6Z_adanrtEsi=ybo9dXk4XI2n9NOw

[@carter7937]

It's so sad how they progress - my friends grandma had Alzheimers and used to get upset she'd forget things and the doctor said "Just wait a few months and she'll be so blissfully unaware that she won't be upset anymore". :/ broke my heart.

[@macul4045]

My Mom called me recently telling me she was sad that we weren't able to make the visit to see her a few months ago. We in fact had made the visit, and it was pretty awful due to the presence of toxic people in the room, where she witnessed some ugly moments between siblings. It was a moment a mother would never forget. I felt horrible for having explained to her what happened that day, as she ultimately ended up having her first epiphany that she was indeed losing her memory. Expectedly, she doesn't even remember that conversation/epiphany even happened. It was a total trip witnessing it happen to her, but in a 'warped' way, I'm glad she doesn't remember it. I hope she goes in peace.

[@just.8797]

Ah dementia, the one disease I fear more than any cancer

[@lpointmpoint3736]

In the final stages, the victim thinks he is the President of the United States.

[@carmenortiz5294]

Of course, at the begining stages, unless it hits them like a lighting strike. You can bet I figured it out. My mother, I believe had a early onset, but taking into account the kind of person she was, she could have had it since her youth. (Lets just say, I shocked her closest relatives when I got sick and tired of them refering to her as saintly.) So you can bet I was paying attention when I started forgetting (a lot later than her). You can bet that I started reading and researching. That was my worse fear. The one thing that surprised me the most was when I read: start doing puzzles to create new brain connections. I tried multiple things and that was the one that worked the fastest. That was about two months ago, I'm forgeting a lot less and when I do I just have to think of related things and go back to remembering. I was nothing less than magic. Not saying that it works for everyone, but creating new brain cells connection sure as heck sound like a good thing. I found out our library has puzzles and you can take them for free. I'm almost 77.

[@GreenEnvy.]

nice! That's great advice about the puzzles. I'll use that.

[@jdtown6585]

Hang in there, ma'am. Good thoughts from me to you.

[@carmenortiz5294]

@@jdtown6585 Thank you

[@jackharrison5534]

All we can do is go as hard as we can for as long as we can. We do what we can.

[@puddintame7794]

The answer is Yes. I used to bring my dog Fifi to an old folks home every Thursday while she was alive. I met many people with dementia. Mary Bergeron told me the first time I met her that she had dementia. Such a wonderful and sweet woman. Her and Gert Menard were my favorites. (Gert was sharp as a tack). There's no question in my mind they're both up in heaven playing with Fifi. So anecdotally, yes, people with dementia can recognize it... in their more lucent periods.

[@pepsiwarren2957]

They do know...my mother use to ask what was wrong with her.

[@slimsantilli4476]

My mom new. Then she stopped eating one day. 😢 she was a smart, beautiful, pleasant woman. I miss her every day.

[@maxzytaruk8558]

I am so sorry for your loss, sounds like she was a good mom❤

[@kenpeters9807]

My dad knew he had it. He’d have very good days, but mostly bad days. On the good days he’d say, there is one advantage to this, I don’t have to buy anymore books.

[@derrickcox7761]

Good to know.

[@chuknorth]

Occasional episodes of sheer terror intermixed with cheerful oblivion. Missing you, Dad.

[@steverontti4199]

Thank you for that information. My dad is in the throws of dementia .

[@overkillblackjack2910]

I am sorry. I say the following lovingly and with respect: This Too Shall Pass.

[@goodmaro]

Throes. The throws of dementia is when they get confused about objects and start tossing them around.

[@overkillblackjack2910]

@@goodmaro not funny; please delete now.

[@mfzoom5401]

@@overkillblackjack2910 He can delete his comment once OP corrects the spelling mistake. 😊

[@overkillblackjack2910]

@@mfzoom5401 I hope you recognize that the spelling mistake is vastly inconsequential within the context of what the OP is trying to communicate. Let's please show some compassion and understanding.

[@bradart7289]

I see signs of it at 82yo. One benefit is I can watch old movies on tv as if they are new !

[@InlikeMikeQuinn]

My mother never once admitted to having a problem. She was diagnosed with dementia and denied it till the end

[@MyWitsEnd.]

My grandpa has dementia. It doesn’t help that he has sons who aren’t emotionally mature enough to handle troubling situations in a serious manner. Instead of being there for him and in particular my grandma/their mom, they mess around with him. Sometimes it is through lying and telling him they already went golfing or to the movies with him, when in fact they have not. He just trust them to think that they did. They all five do this and they aren’t kids but 42-52 years old. I just see them treat him this way and cannot believe how much the millennial generation is lacking when it comes to empathy. But at least my grandpa is a terrible person so I am happy this is how is life will end.

[@markw999]

My father did in the early stages. He could remember not being able to function at later points. That period was pretty short - 6 months or so. He lived 13 years after the symptoms became apparent.

[@nahuelcutrera]

My dad this scare face when he realizes he is not making sense... breaks my hearts, he was so intelligent back in his 50s and 60s, he had two college degrees. But he has me, I'm here for whatever he doesn't get I'll get it for him. It's something at least.

[@maxzytaruk8558]

Alzheimers is so horrible. I am so sorry, and my heart breaks for you, if you or a loved one has it. My grandma went slowly, but in the beginning, it was so rough because she totally knew what was happening to her. Near the end of her life, she suddenly had a bit more clarity, and it was so depressing because she would get panic attacks, and then an hour later forget to even swallow. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. If it offers any comfort, there are moments where they don't seem to be in discomfort, they simply absorb the current surroundings and seem content with them. God I miss her so much

[@jerryelsea8126]

Does a really drunk person know they are really drunk? It’s kinda how I’ve always thought of it

[@Domebuddy]

yes?

[@gavinvalentino6002]

Wait why did I click this video? I must be losing my mind or something.

[@1970swimmer]

My dear mother inlaw passed on January 3rd 2023. She had Lewybody dementia and she knew she had it, but she never let it take her sense of humour away. I would spend every day visiting her in the care home, was it hard on us? Yes. Would I do it again? Yes. Dementia is a cruel and ruthless disease. If we spent a years worth of the same budget we spend on space exploration but transfer that amount to dementia research, who knows what we could find out?

[@ggeorge4144]

We spend very little on space exploration. Taking from what we spend waging wars all over the planet, now that would cure every disease there is. But corporate America will never let that happen.

[@asafoetidajones8181]

As someone who's worked with hundreds of dementia patients, maybe 1k by now, Lewy sucks way worse than alzheimers. Sorry you went through that.

[@XabooAlex]

I totally agree

[@WILLIAM1690WALES]

“they forget that they are forgetting”

[@czernykins]

My mother is a narcissist and a psychopath and the dementia escalated it to inenarrable levels. She abused me repeatedly and cruelly for 3 decades and last few years I'd be better treated in Auschwitz. It's OK to pray to God to take her. Before she outlives me. God don't let that happen. I want an end to the abuse. PLEASE make it stop.

[@CastleHassall]

get a job and move out!!! if they treat you bad all your life you CAN leave!!! listen to Lisa Romano, she talks about this stuff in a kind hearted way

[@kit4616]

I would suggest looking into care services that may be able to help. There may be home nurses or care facilities nearby that specialize in mental health treatment that will significantly ease your burden. Make no mistake, having to care for an abusive relative is a burden and you should not have to endure it. Your only responsibility is to put her into the hands of someone that can deal with her. Best of luck to you man. ♥

[@WVgirl1959]

I read that B1 make be deficient in those with dementia. And some people say to put a tablespoon of coconut oil in their coffee or tea because the five chain fatty acid helps.

[@CastleHassall]

where did you read that? sounds interesting?

[@michaelwelter9509]

I worked with an Alzheimers patient who continually repeated Abbott and Costello's whose on first routine.

[@mikepersico328]

From experience, yes . At the early onslaught of it , the person will realize or be reminded of what they have forgotten . As it progresses , it becomes extremy sad because they don't remember much even if reminded. Depending on the person , they might be able to maintain long term memories.

[@jujucasar2003]

The last few years of her life my mom (she passed away April 2023) was askign to see her mom. Now this doesnt seem too extreme till except my grandma (her mom) died in 1998. We had to we r visiting soon instead of she dead cuz the news of her mom being dead was overwhelming for her. Well I hope my mom gets her wish and gets to c her mom up in heaven. R.I.P Mom love u!!!

[@saintversa356]

My grandmother has ms and dementia, last i went to visit her she was unaware of anything till right as i was about to leave, its like all the sudden i had her back.. she told me please dont leave and i just hugged her as long as i could. After that, its like i lost her all over again.. seems like i only had her with me for a single minute and man, that just wasnt enough fucking time..

[@RPLAsmodeus]

yes

[@Erica-vd1gb]

People in general as they age can kind of tell that their body parts don't work as well but once they cross the line I don't know

[@hrose5484]

I hope I will know it so I can prepare myself.

[@mohannadali9662]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/qWOyc6Z_adanrtEsi=ybo9dXk4XI2n9NOw

[@bountyhunter4885]

So, if someone's a little depressed, and perhaps anxiety sometimes because of, for example : Financial reasons, a relationship, world conflicts, or any other concerning issues in your life...that constitutes an form of early dimentia ? I don't think so. It's more like losing the ability to remember to do the basic things day in day out. Like taking care of yourself, remembering where you placed things, etc. We all get depressed and anxious from time to time.

[@chewtag]

what are you 8 years old?

[@vernonsaayman9741]

You bet!!!

When is the forgetting happening? If you were to record of video and you'd watch it every morning explaining your situation, like in memento or 50 first dates, would you remember it throughout the day or forget what you saw 5 minutes after?

[@GothamandGomorrah]

What if you already have a history of depression & anxiety, and have no spouse to delegate tasks to?

[@Dr.UldenWascht]

Welcome to my world.

[@peterm1826]

A very sad and tragic Disease.

[@fixento]

My mom did, it was three years in to dementia. , I was with her when she had a lucid moment and turned to me and said, " Day after day, the same thing. Day after day.". I thought about that, and it must be hell trapped in a corner of your mind.

[@mannydavis7708]

There's a quote from Boston Legal I can't seem to find again where Denny Crane says something to Alan along the lines of "If God can give us this terrible disease that robs us from being great, the least He could do is take away the memory that we were great."

[@matthewhanhauser5993]

You will see her again!

[@mtnshelby7059]

Well heck I hope i know so I can get the diagnosis and decide my own fate on my last great vacation.

[@BlueSky-eb7ru]

I had a Aunt that did not like me for some reason since childhood . When she got dementia she still didn't like me .never forgot that she didn't like me . weird

[@itsnotme07]

As I like to say, the patient doesn't have dementia/Alzheimer's, the people around them do, since they are aware of the situation.

[@chafouaube985]

At the beginning, yes they know. 2 times in my family😢

[@slayerdearly]

My mom has dementia she was diagnosed with it at only 56 she’s 58 now so :(