Don't Be a Dick: Web DM's RPG Philosophy

[@WebDM]

Thanks for watching! Want more Web DM in your life? Check out our Patreon for our podcast, bonus vids, and more! Patreon.com/webdm Or our Twitch channel for live streamed ttrpgs every Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday! Twitch.tv/webdm Or our live play archive on KZbin: KZbin.com/webdmplays

[@chrisporter2912]

I watch, rewatch, and rewatch these videos every day, always learning. Keep up the good work, as a new DM I want to be the best for my group. You guys, Matt Colville, Nerdarchy, and Critical Role are helping me get there.

[@WookieMan22]

Y’all are my go-to resource for D&D theory and guidelines, and this video is a great example of why that is. I’m just getting reactivated to the game after 25 years and 3 editions later. Session zero, social contracts, pre-defining boundaries... those concepts just weren’t on the radar in the late 80’s. But it would’ve applied as much then as it does now. Keep up the good work! 😃👍🏻

[@SinfonianBro07]

A) This is a fantastic episode; then again, I say that just about every upload you guys put up. Currently dealing with some drama in my group (I’m not GMing btw) and I think this will be a helpful guide for us. B) What beard oil do you use? I’ve been looking for a good oil.

[@christreedee]

THE MOTHER FUCKING SWORD OF DOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@WebDM]

There's one on Amazon that's literally called Viking beard oil

[@frost_dias]

"If you talk back to your parents they can sell you into slavery." "Pruit's had a very unique upbringing."

[@hamstsorkxxor]

This video is not only a guide in how to be a good player; it is a guide in how to be an adult.

[@danieldosso2455]

Adulting is hard, so every little bit helps

[@chasebalcziunas4289]

I forgot to study.

[@Zyphorius]

I died almost immediately

[@Bluecho4]

Exactly. You'd be astounded how little so-called "adults" fail to act like adults. Not in a superficial sense - no one cares if you like to watch children's cartoons - but in the sense of exhibiting maturity. Things like communicating, not acting entitled, being willing to compromise, treating people with respect. These and more are important in a game, because they are important in Life.

[@youtubeseagull]

and a guide on how to make funny intros.

[@ZrinNZ]

I had to collapse a game that I was running a few months ago because 2 of the 3 players were problems. The third player was the husband of the player who was a chronic "I'm sick" person who would constantly just complain about illnesses that we never really knew if they were real or not. The other problem player would be on her phone playing that walking dead game and dealing with her EXTREMELY problem children. It was the last straw (after about 10 sessions) when she said out loud (and at MY HOUSE) "I'm bored" and just kept playing on her phone. I tried to address it post-game with her but she went down the road of "so I might as well just leave huh? Is that what you want?" So I called her bluff and said yes. Yes I did. I then called off the game entirely in the group chat because I had just had enough. When talking to the husband to address his wife's issues, HE then devolved into "so what? Do you want me to DIVORCE my wife!?" And I was so taken aback that I haven't talked to any of them for months now. I couldn't be happier. Its okay to ditch a shitty group.

[@MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD]

Should have said yes to that one too. Maybe they'd have just kept following your advice. See how far you can take it

[@Grumpyoldgamer310]

Had a very similar situation recently, it’s really common.

[@jacobclark8659]

i once had a DM that mainly used the campaign as a way to show off his characters, to the point of basically putting our PC's down by having all of the NPC's rolling nat 20's behind the screen. We would finish a session and he'd then tell us that we had failed at the session and that we were idiots for not finding the perfect solution, even though we thought that we had gotten passed a major scenario and had done there best we could ( saving a town from a kraken but we didn't kill it, we just distract enough to let the people escape on a boat.) It made me hate playing DND to the point of where i genuinely wanted to not show up, yet he would be furious if we didn't turn up even if we had a good reason. (my granddad having a stroke...yeah.) in the end the other players one day just decided to ditch the game and after two weeks i stop speaking to the guy. The best decision in my life

[@nocigar7730]

hey man... your story saddens me. DnD can be so awesome. It is my sincere hope you some day decide to play again as a DM or player and can enjoy it. Don't let that bad experience hold you back from this great hobby. i wish you the best!

[@jacobclark8659]

@@nocigar7730 Hey thanks mate for that. I have few mates that are planning on running Curse of Straud this christmas which will be nice

[@WookieMan22]

Jacob Clark I understand. My first DM was hostile for a bit early on back in high school (AD&D first edition). His problems were unsolvable, he would alter the reality of the game if the party was defeating his monsters, he’d change player-character stats or classes “by the will of the gods”, he’d intentionally pit players against other players, etc. He was a very creative DM and his campaigns were rich in details, but the BS quickly killed the fun. I only lasted a few sessions. He was the only DM we all knew. So I bought my own books and figured out DMing with a different group of friends. Other players started dropping from his games as well and formed other groups with players stepping up to DM. Eventually he was a DM with no players. But he was still a friend. He finally figured it out and came around as a player. I don’t know if he ever DMed again. Long story short is that a DM is only as good as the players he has willing to play in his group. Be a jerk... lose your players.

[@daveford5683]

Jacob Clark Same here, I'll never go back, found some better players and am much happier!

[@Zetimenvec]

Sounds like narcissistic behavior to me. DMing for me is closer to a shared narrative experience where my players help create the story and I act as a guide. Occasionally my players get a little bit lost, but I don't deride them for struggling. Instead I do my best to turn things into a new, more sophisticated story.

[@internetpolice2079]

one of the funniest (and informative) web DM's I have seen!

[@bigfatopinions1338]

One of the funniest intros. I like how Jim is clearly trying not to bust out laughing. Also such an important concept that is not talked about enough in the TTRPG community.

[@Entaris]

Yeah, Jim clearly trying his hardest not to completely lose his mind was definitely amazing.

[@narwhales]

13:05 I never thought I’d have to say to my players “it’s not OK to slap another player in the face.” Until that one game...

[@johngleason4376]

Love this. Dealt with late/no show problems a lot in a group for a long time. We held it against the people who did it a lot and it was really negatively affecting our relationships as friends. One simple talk, saying how much we value the game and time at the table vs how much they value it. We realized our group wanted much more time/commitment from them than what they were willing to give and they left the group. Saved a friendship! Now we just hang with them for lower stakes more flake-able things. Communication is just so important. Loved the video! Thank you!

[@Golden_Raijin]

As to phones at the table, I'm primarily a Pathfinder 1e player, so no matter how well everyone knows the game, we constantly have to search up spells, magic items, feats, etc., and furthermore, one player is an insurance agent, another is an important employee at the local water plant, one more is a higher-up in IT, and our GM is a doctor. We talked about it before-hand in the game, and we all agreed that it is perfectly alright for everyone to have their phones out or on them, as long as they give warning when they have to take a call or respond to a text, and as long as at least one person at a time takes notes for everyone else. In fact, just last session we had to take a 30-minute break because one of the GM's patients died.

[@sebbychou]

"I think I'm gonna go mustache bald" - FORESHADOWING! AAAAAAAAAAH! Suddenly everything makes sense.

[@ricardomorales554]

I love roleplaying I would play it every day if my life allowed it-my life not my wife-she would play as well. -Jim Davis 2018

[@Grumpyoldgamer310]

The singled out xp really resonated with me.. my old Dm used to lean heavily on me to push the storyline along as a player in the group (the leader was really methodical and slow and half the rest of the table tended to sit back on their phones). I never used to miss the sesh and we always gave xp out even to players missing… I had had an argument with another player, and so decided to cool off for a week, and when I returned I found out the party had been awarded 2500xp but I hadn’t. I quit the session and it took 6 months, the phone went and the Dm rang and asked me to come back and apologised and said he had overreacted because he hated me not coming to a session… fairness and equality is a huge thing for me.

[@caman225]

Love the channel, and this was a great episode. A small point to the “golden rule”: I disagree with the idea that you could just operate off of the axiom “treat others how you would want to be treated.” Jim’s point that people’s ideas of how they want to be treated can be very different means that we can’t just operate off of our own feelings of how we want people to act without having a more complex understanding overriding that

[@texteel]

asume others have doen by teh “treat others how you would want to be treated" way. So, if they are dicks to you, not only you are free to be dicks to them, they straight up want you to do so!

[@MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD]

Well, for instance, I find arguments to be constructive and don't take them personally. Some people really really do. Golden rule doesn't work there.

[@darkdwarf007]

I mean, the golden rule implies that people wouldn't want to treat others badly because they wouldn't want to be treated badly themselves. What it means for everyone to treat a person good or bad is the subjective part that everyone in the group has to collectively figure out

[@GreyBeardGamingYT]

Episode one of Web Theologian coming soon?

[@nessesaryschoolthing]

Web Philosophy too

[@McCainenl]

Pruitt could do it I bet

[@an8strengthkobold360]

I would watch that

[@claduke]

Watching Jim during the intros is like watching Jimmy Fallon on old episodes of SNL. And I love every second of it. 😂

[@JoePendra]

This episode has put into words some of the frustrations I've had as a DM but haven't been able articulate to my players. I feel that if we'd had this conversation during the last game I played in, things wouldn't have ended several friendships. Thank you for your continued work!!!

[@cdnarmymedic]

Jim barely controlling the laughter during the intro.... Fucking epic.

[@randyman410]

The channel Seth Skorkowsky has some great videos on the social contract and rpg philosophy, I recommend any fan of ttrpg to check him out

[@JoseRS1186]

Seth is the bomb.

[@kaseybennett7415]

20:01 all I can imagine is a cocaine-fueled night of fighting gnomes determined to steal the party's legs to be taller. Anyone else?

[@dylanmays5311]

Watching Jim trying not to burst out laughing at the beginning was great.

[@cork1576]

Rerolling cocked dice or rolls off the table have always been unwritten rules for my regular group. A new rule I've recently laid down for my game is "If you normally roll in a dice tower or tray, treat dice that bounce out as if the dice fell off the table."

[@nivolord]

For using a phone during session, to access Dnd beyond, use rpg apps or search for inspiration on the web, I have three simple rules: 1) Do not do anything unrelated to the game. 2) Have the phone flat on the table, so you don't physically close yourself of from other players, and people see what you're doing. 3) No audio.

[@2000TalesRolePlaying]

One of the absolute worst experiences I had was when a pair of my players showed up to my house over a half hour late with an extra person who I had never met they told could play and that i would have a character for them without any notice at all.

[@grimjudgment6527]

That's actually the first thing I bought up with the social contract discussion with my groups year ago. "If you're late and it's not an emergency, just let us know before you're late." And "Don't invite players unless The GM and the host agrees that there's space at the table for them." One time someone broke that rule and I just asked them to take their friend home. Because the last time I let someone break that rule and let the friend just watch, not only did the player and observer no throw in money towards the party pizzas, they also ate some, despite the fact that we told the player that we're *definitely* not going to have enough food for those two on top of the rest of the (paying) party. Now, I understand if a person is broke and they mooch, I've been in that situation before. The problem is that the player definitely wasn't broke and the observer didn't seem broke since they were talking about making dinner when they got home. Certain rules have to be strictly enforced, because certain people that seem harmless at first can abuse your leniency.

[@kyliepoe6231]

Years ago my group played a game called Torg. Torg was all about cinematic experiences, and had a deck of cards called the Drama Deck. It had in-game mechanics and story tropes like romance, nemesis or the dreaded martyr card (play to kill any bad guy/save the day, at the expense of your own life) These could be played to bring that story element into your PC's story. Part of our social contract was, if you miss a session, you'll probably come back to the martyr card in your hand. Noone was obligated to play it, mind you, but up against a wall, the party may press the issue a little...

[@mr.incorporeal7642]

Yeah, that whole thing about agreeing about what sort of content will feature in a game certainly resonates with me. I'll never forget the game I was in as a fairly new addition to the group, things seemed to be going well enough, until there was a scene where an NPC, a pregnant woman... had a villain tear open her stomach and rip the fetus out of her... I just had to get up and leave the room. Barely a week before that my sister-in-law had complications with her pregnancy and they had to induce labor to deliver her full-term stillborn daughter. When the group asked me what was wrong and I explained the situation, how literally just days earlier I had held the dead body of my stillborn niece, what did they tell me? "Chill out dude, it's just a game!" I stopped going to sessions with that group.

[@CzarVentus]

This might be one of your best episodes to date, which speak a lot for itself because most of them are already reeeeeaaallly good ^^

[@WebDM]

Thank you!

[@I-VisiBomb-I]

i would really appreciate it if you'd make an episode about getting in character during play and how to avoid the awkward feeling you sometimes get when role playing.

[@stephenclements6158]

That's a good one.

[@danieldosso2455]

just gotta dive in I think. There's just gonna be plenty of awkward moments at the table

[@lebanc571]

Practice. It gets easier as you do it more. Don't sweat the mistakes you make along the way and keep enjoying your character. It also helps to play with people who aren't judgmental assholes

[@Danmarinja]

But of advice, I have a little system where each character I make has a set of dice that reflects their personality in some way, making it slightly easier to remind myself of what is going through my character’s head, with a physical object that ties me to them. Give yourself a different voice, maybe you have an accent or impersonate a character you like or even just alter how nasally or fast you talk. Give your character a massive flaw that you can relate to. One of the best tools for acting is the ability to draw on experience, and if your character has a flaw that you know enough about it can make your character more relatable. My current character is a paranoid, which I draw from my religious background with the constant feeling of ‘I don’t know if this minor action is considered evil.’ Instead, just channelled towards fairies rather than anything overtly religious so as not to offend the three Christian players in the group, also because it’s just funnier to perform the anti-fairy rituals.

[@Grumpyoldgamer310]

Best advice I can give… don’t try and force it… just let it come naturally. Try and picture the scene in your head ask your Dm to give you some finer details of your surroundings etc. Will try and give you two examples… 1st: you have your character sheet in front of you, you have just literally finished talking to your friend beside you about the last episode of a tv show you both like…. The Dm starts the session by announcing “your in a tavern what do you want to do?” It’s very difficult to drop into character for anyone under those conditions. 2nd: you have taken a few minutes to look over your character sheet, checked your equipment and imagined yourself donned in armour with your shield slung over your back or your axe finally honed after you spent an hour sharpening and oiling it previously. The out of game chat had already ended and the Dm has been setting the scene of a ramshackle backally tavern, filled with the dregs of society and drunken sailors home from sea, he describes the old haggard barmaid limping towards you and asks you “Well Dwarf, you’ve been nursing that axe for the last ten minutes, how about kindly buying an ale to nurse, or looking for another tap house to frequent!” Your going to be much more inclined to want to put on a voice and start rebuffing the old woman than you would be getting into character in the first example. If you already have an image of your character interacting with their surroundings in your head, it’s going to be a lot easier to slip into roll. Hope this helps at all.

[@Blandco]

Seeing the Warhammer Fantasy Roleplaying 2nd edition book in the background makes me happy.

[@mosselliadelt]

Oh hey, look, another good channel commenting.

[@Blandco]

@@mosselliadelt Keep the sarcasm to yourself kiddo.

[@mosselliadelt]

No sarcasm, I enjoy your videos.

[@stephenclements6158]

Good video, and I'll add on why banning cell phones at the table (unless there are extenuating circumstances) is a good idea. Three reasons come to mind: 1. Being on your cellphone while the DM and other players are talking is at least an unintentional way of saying, "I don't care what you're doing and am bored by the game." Gaming is a collaborative effort, and telling the people there with you that this app is more entertaining than you is disrespectful. 2. The people on their cellphones are ALWAYS lagging behind the people paying attention. They are less prepared, they eat up time trying to catch up, and wasting the time of the people around you is disrespectful. 3. When I have banned cellphones at my table, the person who was on their cellphone has a better time after the ban. Shockingly, being engaged in the game you went to and not distracting yourself from it heightens your enjoyment of the game! Help them get out of their own way by banning cellphones.

[@TomasCyr]

Dnd beyond is what I use for my character. You might want a backpack full of books. I enjoy everything at my fingertips. In point of fact I'm still trying to convince my table to adopt it for everyone. Now, if you want to ban using a cellphone for non dnd activity, I'm with you.

[@thepurehealer1279]

I dunno if that always works... lot of the time at my table my friends have families and kids that they need to be ready to be notified of at all times, it's just not supportive of all players as much as I wish cause that would make my dming better

[@kcl2d]

'Always' is a dangerous thing to say. I, for one, play in a game where I am the sort of de facto party leader and never find myself behind the story or in combat. I also happen to use my phone to access D&D Beyond throughout the entire session. While I get that anecdotal evidence is not always the best, I feel like trying to convince others to adopt your blanket policy may turn off some players. I also happen to DM and I allow phones at the table. It's key to know your players.

[@bibbobella]

I will have to disagree at least slightly. If I am on the phone it is because I am most likely looking up a spell or the like and catching up on the rules to make sure I have my turn ready or it is simply because the other player is having a convensation with an NPC/another player that my character isn't part of. I distract myself to make sure I don't accidently metagame by knowing stuff I am not supposted to know. If the player takes the time to explain to me what was said or obviously want me to hear it then I will be all ears. If they are having a trade with a trader in another town over then I am going to be on my phone because that is non of my freaking business unless the player tells me in character later.

[@mosselliadelt]

I've banned cell phones except for emergencies. If people want to use d&d beyond or other online resources, I'd ask them to find another DM.

[@andrewdavis8251]

The best tabletop advice, period.

[@nickwilliams8302]

Yep. Everything else flows out of "don't be a dick".

[@chriscox8237]

Truthfully great life advice

[@LoreKeeperv01]

Once again, there is a reason why a session zero exist...

[@IAmTheStig32]

There's a good vetting process for playing with randoms on Roll20. Plan five or six oneshots and run them in sequence, each time say you're looking for players. Treat the oneshot like a job interview: If they ever get lecherous, boot them. If they try to drag politics into the game, boot them. If a player brings a Mary Sue or goes murderhobo, boot them. If a player starts aggressively arguing with you over a ruling, boot them. If a player doesn't turn up, run without them and forget they ever exist. If a player made it through to the end and you enjoyed running with them, invite them to the next oneshot. Rinse and repeat until you have about four to six players you like and then stick with them. Another good idea for avoiding bad players: Avoid D&D. Controversial thing to say I know, and I'm not saying that D&D naturally attracts assholes or other systems don't have bad players, but it is undeniably the system everybody knows and usually bad players just stick with their D&D without trying other games.

[@rufflesandfalcor199]

They made 7 "Saw" movies. Once more Pruit cuts to the heart of it. Critical insight roll.

[@rufflesandfalcor199]

Side note, "Like an otter's pelt." Is the new official motto of webDM fans.

[@iv0rysh0es39]

Key rules to functioning as a mature human in life. Furthermore, it all boils down to, trust. To trust your DM and party in reality is key. But above all else, I completely feel the logistical frustrations. To get everyone on one mutual schedule is nearly impossible, especially with school, work, and timezone differences. It's a level 17-20 challenge adventure in itself.

[@TheHawkhead1HunterK]

Holy shit this was the best Web DM joke to date: 18:02 great video you guys, and i love all that you do!

[@Zetimenvec]

My personal experiences with cell phones; I understand and try to be somewhat reasonable on the topic of cell phones. Most of my players don't use their cell phones as an aid in D&D, but people would often be on their cell phones for the majority of the campaign. What wound up happening was the development would be slow as I focused on what one character is trying to get done when they get back to town and have some slightly more personalized interests to get through, so as I was focusing on them the other players would start browsing instagram or facebook or whatever. In this instance it's not the hugest deal, but often times when two or more people where on their phones, they'd start up conversations about what they were looking for and it would very quickly derail and overtake the narrative I was trying to get through with the one player. When I finally finished getting through their topic and shift to someone else, the new player would put down their phone, and the one I finished with would pick theirs up. This became a general trend for the entire session and bleed into group narratives and combat. When it wasn't their turn, they were on their phone. This lead to a lot of me re-explaining and re-narrating things that they missed because they were browsing the internet, that coupled with half of my group refusing to communicate lateness(1-3 hours lateness)/absences, I killed the campaign and restarted a new one. The players I salvaged from the campaign who were more participatory and more communicative about their attendance I put heavy emphasis that while cell phones are permitted, I'm not going to re-explain things, and players can't be on their cell phones every single moment their character isn't personally doing something in the campaign. It means everything takes longer, which means it takes more time for me to get to you and exacerbates the issue. The new campaign has been going alright in this respect. One of the players still uses their cell phone a lot, but I rarely have to re-explain things to them. I still have a knee-jerk reaction that if I see someone on their phone continuously it's a hindrance to the flow of the campaign, but it's not actually been a massive issue.

[@The_Sharktocrab]

You guys are great people and I appreciate what you do for this hobby

[@Daredhnu]

I'd like to add that it goes both ways, if something comes up in a game and you find it offensive or whatever be an adult about it, don't throw a fit or become confrontational, just express you'd like to skip these sorts of things and move on or remove yourself from the table if it's something that can't be easily skipped over, most people will honor your request if you make it politely, this is pertaining to stuff that wasn't discussed beforehand obviously.

[@derekburge5294]

"That ain't beaver. What critter ye get that pelt from?" "That right thar be genuine Davis." "Like silk."

[@TheGentlemanDuelist]

I’m very fortunate in that I game with a bunch of folks who have more or less the same moral values as I do. But when I’m telling the story I openly communicate that I will be pushing some boundaries and I implore the players to tell me if I go too far. Because, as you said, sometimes you don’t even know something will make something not fun until it’s upon you. So, glad someone else has noticed this happen!

[@Wyrd-Oh]

Our group is currently dealing with someone who is definitely wearing our social contract thin. We had a session zero, in which the DM said they wanted to organise to play at least every two weeks, Saturday or Sunday lunch time. A couple days later when messaging about setting up the first session, "Absentee" pipes up with "Oh, hey yeah I should have told you I'm working til late every weekend this month." We finally organise a date, the night before the DM sends out a "So everyone is good for tomorrow?" and Absentee sends a "Oh damn, that's tomorrow?" We do the first session without them which goes well, second and third session they actually show up. Fourth session, we all arrive, about thirty minutes past our start time we get a message; "I'm sorry I've got food poisoning, start without me." I want to give this person the benefit of the doubt, because when they're there they're great, fun to play with and knows what they're doing, but at the same time it's tempering my excitement for a campaign that the DM has put a hell of a lot of work into so far.

[@WebDM]

As we say in the vid, we've been there! Played with people (heck, sometimes we've BEEN the person) who, for whatever reason, can't make it continually. Our way of dealing with those situations is to not plan on them coming but welcome them and enjoy their company when they do. They and their character are usually happy to be included when they can make it.

[@cosmoreverb3977]

One tip I have to make sure players don't attempt to do shady stuff about their dice rolls (you should definitely tell your players that you'll be doing this): if they try *anything* you will automatically consider the roll a fail, you can even not do this, but tell your players you'll do this, and they will definitely not try anything.

[@keegansullivan1571]

This was a super solid video. I think the only legit time I was really mad about no shows was over a game of Pugmir. All the people called within 30 to 15 minutes before the game started, which is frustrating by itself, but one of my players lives an hour away with spotty cell service for most of that drive. For my more mature games we have a talk on what are hard limits on terms of subject matters, we try and get it all out in the open, and I preface certain sessions with a reminder that it's okay to just stop. After that initial session I create stoplight cards in case there's something players didn't think were a problem or when soft limits crossed over into hard limits.

[@reubenfromow4854]

This only addresses one section of this issue, but I hope it’s useful... *Some things DMs want (for players)*: -Take an interest in your character outside of the game. It’s okay to ask questions if you’re confused or new, but if you’ve been playing this game for a few sessions/weeks, do your utmost to avoid situations where you ask “hey, what does [insert ability/spell here] do?” -help to set up. DM’s prepare a lot OUTSIDE of the session. If there’s stuff about setting up (table, food, books, character sheets, paper, Dice, notes) that hasn’t been done yet, it’s rather miffing. -Be forgiving. DMs forget stuff, leave plot holes, don’t always set up everything they need to. Please don’t get huffy at them for this- they have a lot to think about. -Pay attention during the session. Yes, it may be boring at the moment, but that may be the opportunity for you as a player to spice things up a little! Switching off until everything starts moving again (or HEAVEN FORBID, asking what just happened) is immensely disheartening. *Some things players want (for DMs)*: -Remember it’s just a game. Not only that, it’s one that everyone’s playing. Make sure that everyone’s involved, and try to avoid situations where you tell your players (“no that doesn’t work” in such a way as to make their character feel useless. -if players are particularly imaginative, play into that. If they’re not, and don’t show as much agency, be respectful of that as well, prompt them, and maybe even give them options. -prepare before the session. If you turn up before the session and have no idea what’s happening (or heaven forbid, PREPARE DURING scheduled session times), your players will not be interested. If anyone’s got anything they’d like to add, go ahead!

[@Olorin486]

I know most groups hold the position that "the DM is always right," but I never felt comfortable with investing one person at the table with one kind of authority, both as a player and as a DM. When I DM, I stick as closely as possible to RAW in an effort to prevent confusion and also to shut down some of the more egregious violations. I have a little pdf document explicitly detailing any deviation from RAW for whatever system I'm using, and I present this document at session 0, so that everybody has a fair shake of looking it over and understanding the rules. The rules are the contract for both myself and the players- they're the only thing explicitly codified. If I am wrong about a rule, I encourage the players to challenge it and point out in the book where the mistake was. It's a weird way of doing things compared to most tables, but I've found that it creates the least confusion, at least for experienced players. For players, it never feels like I'm shutting them down just to railroad them- there's a clear authority independent of me to appeal to. It defuses tension at the table by eliminating arguments about RAI, interpretation, etc, and it makes the "beleaguered DM vs. Players' shenanigans" mentality that crops up in so many groups vanish instantly. That's a toxic mentality that instantly ruins my fun no matter which side of the "conflict" I'm on. Avoiding that is way more valuable than playing God for three hours.

[@Mia-jt7ks]

i'd love to see a run-down of some of your unspoken rules that aren't necessarily strictly social. My GM recently ran into some situations with new players she didn't realize she would need to explain, like "Don't retool your character in the middle of an ongoing campaign without consulting with the DM before hand" and other stuff that seemed so obvious no one thought to explain it beforehand

[@windsgrace688]

This is amazing timing as I'm holding my first session zero tomorrow!

[@erc1971erc1971]

If you can set another die on a crooked die and it stays, the roll stands; but if the die falls off, you reroll :P

[@ironreed2654]

Starting to wonder if Jim Davis is the creator of Puffin Forrests brother, Prewit described his every class character like 2 years before Obserd was created.

[@Sasha-ff5ce]

I’ve been watching a ton of these and I wish I could be at your D&D table

[@animusnocturnus7131]

I had a player showing other players memes they found online during the game. It was at that moment that I stepped in and said "either we're playing this game, or you're on your phone and show some funny pictures around. You can decide what you want to do, but I won't play with only 1/3 of my group."

[@Brandwein42]

As a DM host, i recently let go of a lot of headache by NOT planning the dates myself. It was always like i was planning a party and the guests cancel it. Not fun. Since i let my players plan the dates its a lot less stressful for me. Also i let them bring stuff to drink and snack to "pay" me. I get to have leftovers. Before i bought things for the date which went to waste if canceled. Last of all i won't punish my players for bad behavior anymore because it leads to resentment. If i like something i might reward a player, but no negatives.

[@paulh5984]

Food going to waste: We had a group of six players, and I was host/DM. MY wife was out of the house all day with work, so I decided to bake a kick ass lasagna (dinner and gaming was the theme of our events - good friends, hot food, and hotter dice, right?). So, as the lasagna is baking, I get my first cancellation text. Then another. Then another. And then another. I went to pick up the last two players and had another cancel. So, it ended up being me, my wife and one other player eating the lasagna. I ate lasagna for a week. I was pretty upset about the last minute cancellations. But, I love lasagna, so lasagna!

[@WolfTheOld]

Please do an one-shot on your framework of personal development through RPG!? I love this! Helps me a lot to find faith in my passion again.

[@DrSmoothlove]

My philosophy on this matter has always been "Be considerate." I believe if you are thinking of others you will be able to get along even if you disagree.

[@coopervantine5826]

Haven’t even watched it and I already love it

[@Haplessrabit]

I use my phone for notes, saves space and i can review it outside of the game if need be. Saves the DM on occasion.

[@EnderLord007]

On the topic of phones, I once had a guy whip out his laptop (a lot of us used laptops for character sheets) and just straight up start playing Modern Warfare 2. It was fucking surreal to me, but it didn’t bring down the session.

[@WebDM]

Most individual behavior that isn't noisy doesn't bring down the session unless you let it.

[@Hellbunnyism]

Another great ep. I don't know if you'll see this Pruitt but thank you so much for introducing me to The Sword!

[@tharrock337]

I have been a dontbeadickist DM for years now, thanks for making this video WebDM, your philosophy needs more support!

[@WebDM]

Agreed, it's the philosophy that has allowed us to game together for decades now!!

[@tharrock337]

@@WebDM I particualy loved when you brought up how to adress the social contract in a session zero. I did exactly that in couple of months back when my new campaign kicked off. Wish I had this video before I learned this lesson the hard way. How important it is to set these groundrules in a 5 friends together talking about goals rather than a 4 players and a DM kinda way. About a year back I ran a oneshot night with a bunch of friends to, for his birthday, kill Hitler in every setting we could think off. We were perfectly fine with this, being german history students for the most part until we invited another friend who, without ever bringing up what the topic of the oneshots would be (yeah that was stupid) joined in later. Turns ot he was jewish and understandably didn't see this like we did as a harmless joke. Never again.

[@majones117]

My group has had a lot of issues with being on time and no call no shows. You give some good advise for dealing with it

[@Cbutlerification]

You guys are amazing, I use a lot of things like this. But communication is key.

[@alexhall4690]

So I am gonna be a new DM soon, so I have been going back through a lot of your old content, and was really hoping today that the video would be related, I asked for advice, and I was given pure joy

[@WebDM]

Good luck!

[@KyleNelson89]

How's your campaign going 7 months later?

[@Rokuns]

Biggest issue I've seen in good groups breaking up, to the point of DM's and Players both being blacklisted from future games generally revolves around unfair punishment, Rolls not mattering, and lack of respect for those at the table. Players on phones or other devices is more circumstantial, if they're using it for emergency or work, dnd beyond to have quick ref on their character or to type in some notes/items they received I have no issues as either player or DM. If they're constantly on it taking pictures or looking up stuff other then for DND (basically fucking off) shows a severe lack of respect for fellow players and especially the DM. I have zero tolerance for that crap and as a DM I give one warning cus I lay out the rule before starting a game and spend countless hours setting up everything. Nothing is more frustrating then spending 20+ hours for a single session only to have it ruined or slowed to a crawl cus "That Guy/Gal" is constantly pissing off the party/DM by stopping play to ask "what happened/what's going on?" in between texting and/or facebooking. Nothing will ruin a game quicker if rolls don't matter, this is mainly an issue where very new DM's want to rail road the players or weren't prepared for a basic outcome and set the check to impossible. Players will outright stop participating or get excited when they constantly see their high rolls mean nothing, getting a Nat 20 and having a +5 modifier as a lvl 2-3 character and failing or not being rewarded (Info for story, items, gold, etc.) makes the entire table take a step back and scratch their heads. I'm not talking about a bard trying to seduce a Dragon and getting a single lucky roll (make em do 2-3 for really hard tasks), but playing to a Die roll can really encourage players to RP more and be more invested leading to far better and memorable sessions. This can also apply to the "Dice DM" who wants the players to keep making 3-5 rolls for simple tasks or remake skill checks constantly and punishing players the moment they fail. Last big thing, and probably I'd say the worst is unfair/unjust punishment. I've seen this happen from experienced and unexperienced DM's alike, generally stemming from the DM's actually dislike of the Player, the Players character, or from their ego. I've never seen these games last past session two because the entire group tends to turn on the dm and not return or straight up tell them they're done with the DM's campaign. Nothing like asking a question (Especially as a brand new player), instead of an answer you're told to roll a 2 d20's and take that much damage as psychic as a lvl 1 (which generally kills that character outright), or rolling a Nat 20 as a rogue to disarm a deadly trap only to take 6d6 acid because the party or player celebrated "A bit to much" for the DM's liking, not remembering a story or plot point and having your gear stolen despite posting guards/detection spells, or sleeping at an inn, list goes on I've seen it all. In these style games it generally goes from the light hearted "Let's have nerdy fun together!" to "I'm not ever joining this persons campaigns again!" almost instantly. The moment players start getting punished out of DM spite is the moment all RP and enjoyment come to a halt for that player and generally the group. Players will no longer ask to do things, they'll no longer interact with NPC's or objects, they won't explore or try their luck, and they won't come to the next session if they're smart.

[@maddogs1989]

My problem with social contracts is that to many times now I've personally had the it used on voting a person out with out any violations of a policy simply because two people had an issue with a persons play style. All this without even being involved in the decision or discussion.

[@typerez1251]

Oh my god. Pruitt’s face, was so perfect

[@valasafantastic1055]

Great video. It has many vital tips to keep in mind for all players of all tabletop rpgs! I particularly enjoy the part near the beginning about players not forcing each other to play. I’ve been going through a rough time and sometimes don’t want to play, or mentally am just not in the right place even though I love D&D. I am the DM and I have a player who keeps getting angry and guilting me and well... being real mean when I say I’m just not up to it. I played this video near them and they seem to get it now so thanks! This video makes many important points and is a great one for everyone to watch especially getting ready for a session 0 of a new campaign! Our group has a few things such as; veiling or glossing over rape and the details of torture, re-rolling dice if they go off the table or land oddly, and planning easy to eat meals such as pizza.

[@awaytoanywhere699]

at 0:15 how many retakes did you guys do?? 😂

[@KevinOutdoors]

I appreciate the point about not playing through torture but it can be kept light and funny. We captured 2 goblins they were bound and my Firbolg Ranger drew his hand axe and spoke to them in Goblin "The first Gobby to tell us the truth gets to keep his feet". Not really torture but a RP threat that got the party what they wanted. Both Gobby's kept their feet. :)

[@adumlarp999]

I love this show. You guys are so damn watchable, and the topics you cover are so great for us table top gamers. Thank you for the consistently great content.

[@georgewashington7083]

Couldn't tell if he was using sudoku as a euphemism for suicide or actually talking about sudoku.

[@FrogDog-uf3iv]

Very good conversation. My add to cell phones would be when players aren't prepared for their turn. Phone away as long as you are ready to go when it's your turn.

[@jacobfike3697]

dude. fuckin' SWEET shirt, Pruitt

[@Liveebee]

Sometimes you have to talk about things you weren't expecting, i've had to talk to a player who thought it was okay to play a single player game while it wasn't his turn in combat...

[@thegreatbrambo1403]

We have a player that often talks over and interrupts other players. Our system involved introducing my old football helmet. Whenever he speaks over some one who is already talking we just point at the helmet and the one who got interrupted gets to smack the top of it. Quite Thrilling really.

[@WebDM]

Awesome! Sounds like the interruptor is a good sport about it! If so, way to go for diffusing what could be a tense situation with good humor and flexibility!

[@thegreatbrambo1403]

@@WebDM Hes a great sport about it. He recognizes its something he needs to work on but we still love him. Funnily enough since the helmets introduction he interrupts less.

[@Phoenixcaptain46]

This is the most perfectly timed episode ever. I've been needing to have a "talk" with other players at my table, and I can direct them to this

[@laurelhill3505]

I always believe the table should look as the dm as just another player. The naming of "DM" and "Player" really causes misunderstandings, because everyone is a player. And everyone should have a voice in how things are run.

[@grizzly_8917]

Preface: this is my first time DMing and everyone at my table has never played before ( I have). 1st session went off without a hitch and everyone was awesome with rp and combat and paying attention. Everyone said it was a really cool plot opening and everything. Come to second session (they just arrived into one of the larger cities) one of my friends just recently got smash bros and pretty much played it on and off the whole session with the sound on. I told him to put it away once and he listened but then got it out again not even 20 minutes later. This just made me extremely frustrated and I've put up a block of rules in our group chat including no electronics as to appear not to single him out. Is this fair?

[@thepurehealer1279]

Eh, kinda? Hard to say as it is really a case by case basis but overall prefacing the rule of no items non dnd related (unless you receive an important call or something) is something better explained BEFORE the campaign or session if you can help it, as enforcing it after you state it makes it seem far more reasonable

[@joshtrue6521]

Absolutely, regardless of if they are your friend, they are showing no regard for the other players. They are being rude and disruptive to the game. If I was you and I continued to have problems I would consider banning the player altogether until they got their shit together.

[@stephenclements6158]

Absolutely fair. Come to play or don't come.

[@Inevitibility23]

My rules: 1. No videogames in session. Bring them if you want to, but only play them during breaks or before/after the session. Fortnite can wait. 2. If you ask the person not to do what they're doing and they do it again, that's kinda lame but give them the benefit of the doubt. Maybe they just forgot (although in this specific case of 20 minutes later- they don't get that benefit). But if they keep ignoring you and being belligerent, no more. They're done. 3. Phones ARE allowed. Most of my players keep characters on an app instead of a sheet, and making and keeping track kf characters is really convenient this way. Additionally, sometimes rifling through books can really slow things down. Nothing wrong with googling something like a spell description to save time. No googling monster stat blocks and other metagaming material though.

[@ezrablock3218]

I feel like talking honestly to this person would feel less passive aggressive and extreme. I understand they pulled a jerk move, but just having a one to one would, I think, de-escalate the situation.

[@Simplebeing2435]

I think it's also important to know how the group is going to deal with the game when not playing. I had a pretty bad experience with my current group (which I play with my best friends) where I had a bunch of letters that my character carries around with them that are very sentimental and contain elements of his backstory. One my fellow players took it upon herself to go through my binder of notes and read through the letters in secret. It was a huge violation of trust that damaged our friendship, got her kicked out of the game, and made me very uncomfortable playing that character since she took away my ability to tell that character's story.

[@andrewbacon4001]

Personally I have no quarrels with cell phones unless they are doing something unnecessary. I like everyone to pay attention because I put a large amount of time into our campaign

[@ryanmcintyre5639]

Loving the channel guys, keep up the good work! Also, I’d like to know your opinions on how to start fresh after the DM or the party experiences burnout and wants to start a brand new campaign

[@pitanguirj]

Very good vid, guys..I have problems with players trying to influence others' in-game decisions. This can be very frustrating for the whole group. This is also on my pre-game contract.

[@jacobbeaudoin5486]

What do you guys reccomend for players who "hog the limelight" I'm dming for a group and a majority of the problems we run into come from a particular players need to be important. He is otherwise polite and a good role player, it just has to be about him, and I dont know how to handle it.

[@jimdavis141]

jacob beaudoin have you talked to him about it? I’d start there. There are lots of reasons a player might try to hog the limelight and he may not be aware it’s happening. When it happens in the game, gently remind the player that someone else has the spotlight and to wait until it’s their turn.

[@jacobbeaudoin5486]

@@jimdavis141 thanks for the reply! after talking to him, he feels like he is in competition with other players over time and space because we have a six person party, I dont think he realized the extent of his actions until we had the talk, and now I'm working in more character specific stuff for our next game set in Ravnica. Thanks for the advice.

[@Dyndrilliac]

Speaking from my own personal experience, I have been told on multiple occasions that I am "that guy" who kind of hogs the spotlight. And to some extent, that behavior is somewhat intentional, but only in the circumstances where we have a game going and everyone else seems content to stand around and not do anything until an NPC explicitly directs us to do something. I have begun to explicitly state at the beginning of campaigns that I will not, under any circumstances, simply be satisfied waiting around for someone else to lead the group. I'm fine with anyone else leading who chooses to do so, but if no one steps up, I will - without hesitation. And I want to give both current and future campaigns the opportunity to tell me in advance whether or not that personal quirk of mine is a deal-breaker so everyone playing can have a good time, with or without me present at the table. You should talk to the player and find out the root cause of why they are hogging the limelight. They may not be aware they are doing it or they may be like me and be aware but then feel as though they were left with no other choice because everyone else seems to be fine playing NPC's with absolutely zero motivation for adventuring.

[@facsimileq1906]

@@Dyndrilliac And in that case the dm can help out the more introverted players by handing them levers for rp involvement. Give the quiet pc's a neccessary piece of information to tell the group rather then having the dm narrate it for limelight guy to just make a decision about it. When some expert pc makes a history check role hand that pc a card of information rather than you the dm just narrating it to the whole group. Making pcs have to talk to eachother is key to getting them to share limelight.

[@jacobbeaudoin5486]

@@Dyndrilliac I get that, I just feel that in those sorts of situations a little patience goes a long way. People in my group aren't used to taking the lead, so I try to coax it out of them a bit,but when one player starts dominating it, the other players default to just doing what they're told.

[@brootalbap]

That intro was fantastic :D

[@Minrow56]

Came for the D&D, stayed for the otter's pelt.

[@te1381]

I had a new player playing a wizard. He was always on his phone playing some other game during our sessions, then on his turn he didn't know what spell to cast or what they did. He ended up leaving the group for other reasons but I was getting pretty annoyed about his behavior.

[@rickeymariu1]

I don't mind cell phones as long as people aren't trolling the internet and still paying attention.

[@KineticConstant]

18:08 Jim laughing as his world comes crumbling down around him

[@MrAverus]

Was the d20 roll for the fireball on Stranger Things an attempt to beat some sort of Old School magic resistance?

[@eliaspatrikis1926]

Can you guys do a video just talking about the characters you have played and the stories from games you've played in. I love hearing them but its always in little bits scattered across videos.

[@emophobe]

Man, Cody tried really hard in that sudoku puzzle for you guys too. :(

[@Zyphorius]

I honestly thought the golden rule was “whoever has the gold, makes the rules.

[@restlesswretch3555]

True

[@GamerNxUSN]

"I didn't sign shit!" -Lysander Spooner

[@mathsalot8099]

I DM an adventure league game, so this maxim is extremely important, but hard to implement because my players are fluid. I have a couple regulars, but my table is open to 3-4 newcomers each week, so I've narrowed my "rules" down to one: Show respect. Respect the DM by listening, respect others by not talking over them, respect yourself by being prepared and giving yourself the best chance to have fun, etc. It's a very broad umbrella. Edit: I have a few elementary kids in my group, so DbaD is a little too crude for them, imo.

[@youtubeseagull]

so impressed with the funny intro. maybe they should make a short film . Somebody's a good editor

[@Valdagast]

Remember the law of effect: "responses that produce a satisfying effect in a particular situation become more likely to occur again in that situation, and responses that produce a discomforting effect become less likely to occur again in that situation."

[@michaelfunk4907]

My names is every g-damn DM ever, and I approve of this message!

[@Licjr]

I'm feeling blessed in that I haven't played with some of the lunatics that were mentioned but not named in this epidemic

[@The_Sharktocrab]

Some of the hardest advice to follow unfortunately

[@themadmonk6379]

One of my favorite intros.