Dragon Age The Veilguard of War

[@niemiec745]

Don't let this distract you from the fact that the elven gods Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain have escaped Fen'Harel's prison.

[@antonkirilenko3116]

Or that dwarves can't dream

[@joaopc94]

The guys from warhammer?

[@Jgarcia05]

​@@antonkirilenko3116Or the artifacts

[@4Core100]

@@Jgarcia05 I know where the artifacts are but Dunkey comment section is not it

[@tomkrawec]

And then they got amneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesia.

[@ziyaanbiswas8467]

This is The first short term memory loss type game

[@havvomusic]

More like the first short term memory game lol

[@havvomusic]

Its actually the first short term memory loss game lol

[@whyjustwhy0]

@@havvomusicno no you’ve got it wrong it’s actually the first short term memory loss game

[@Censortubes]

It’s because they know it’s made for mindless npcs.

[@Zen_Gun]

Maybe the writers of this game... all have amnesia

[@maximilliannewcombe1719]

We should applaud BioWare for being the first developer to make their games fully accessible to those with complete short term memory loss

[@mementomori2365]

Finally good inclusion

[@mikeoakeshart3823]

It's appeals to genz ADHD youtube shorts tiktok kind of audience 😂😂

[@mzxa9988]

Streamers finally have a game suites for them

[@Jiaqi1998]

This was hilarious😂

[@Princeps2]

Yeah, my fish is really happy playing this game.

[@jessavelane]

Then Morrigan showed up and recapped all the 3 previous games. After that, she did it again.

[@Varthanil]

We are looking for an artifact. Remember

[@Dapstart]

@@Varthanil can you tell me about this artifact again?

[@HierophanticRose]

They are gonna keep bringing Morrigan back until she looks like her mother.

[@favoritemustard3542]

More Morrigan makes mental men merry.

[@JiggyTcg]

They knew all the dragon age fans were getting old so they made sure to recap it for the dementia patients.

[@marcofiume3921]

We're not getting THAT old, what about original Baldur's Gate fans then? 😭

[@PeppermintBissextile]

So that's why! I'll play this when I reach 80 then.

[@puddi_Cat]

​@@marcofiume3921 We got one of the best games made in history, for the third time.

[@dancep]

@@marcofiume3921 Those war heroes are no longer with us...

[@keiranleeoates]

It's more for the younger ones, they might not be paying attention to the game as they need those quick hits of dopamine, so luckily the game reminds them

[@zioniczenko]

This game couldn't be made in Dreams because Dwarves Don't Dream.

[@Evanz111]

Nobody could have wished for this game because even Make a Wish kids wouldn’t be caught dead playing it

[@GodChaos333]

Maybe you have a point. Because dwarves don’t dream. Well that just happened.

[@Mark-vr7pt]

But then, they somehow could

[@valterfara5027]

​@@Mark-vr7ptThis game broke all the lore even in the trailer. I gave up before it even came out.

[@jeredgore6180]

If dwarves don't dream how can their memes be dreams to melt steel beams

[@Paulysolo]

I've never seen a video game that assumes you are browsing your phone while playing it.

[@TheMGMfan]

This video actually did remind me of when I heard that Netflix wants its shows to be made with the expectation that the viewer is doing something else while watching it; apparently, some of their shows repeat themselves a lot, probably to ensure you don't need to pay full attention to know what's going on (at the very least, their ATLA adaptation does this a lot from what I've seen). It genuinely feels like that’s why this game does it as well.

[@ArifRWinandar]

@@TheMGMfan I heard ATLA was also shot in a weird way so that it can be converted easily to vertical viewing.

[@mylesfrost9302]

@@ArifRWinandar whats ATLA?

[@Larkinsmithx]

@@mylesfrost9302avatar the last airbender

[@jakebrady5531]

In that sense, I guess you can say it's innovative. 🤣👍🏻

[@jams2399]

This whole game is just “they fly now” writing in every line

[@blueshit199]

"Just one of those days"

[@gymonstarfunkle136]

Proof that Joss Whedon has had a net negative effect on popular culture despite making some great TV shows.

[@onlyrealnumber]

Finally, a game that reminds you of the plot every 2 minutes so you can pay more attention to the 3 other screens you're looking at.

[@everettgiesbrecht779]

I'm waiting for the Subway Surfers and Family Guy clips while an AI voice reads Reddit posts DLC

[@swaggerdagger8976]

i dont want to live in a world where media starts being catered to people who only half pay attention to it with family guy or subway surfers in their peripheral vision

[@planescaped]

Truly a game made for the modern audience, lol.

[@crystalz-h1d]

🤣

[@deadjuice1880]

@@swaggerdagger8976 It ruins the pace of the story and development by taking up dialoged time, and allows for bad writing habits.

[@d0onut]

Dialogue sounds like they expect me to put the game down for 6 months every 5 minutes

[@sigy4ever]

cus its traaaaash

[@jepeman]

Its a bedtime story for toddlers, teaching how to be nice to each other. The scary fight parts are a bit iffy though.

[@Ambilition]

I mean.... won't you?

[@mellowyellow6572]

Everyone talks like they’re in a Marvel movie. I miss when fantasy characters were eloquent not anachronistic.

[@Rägarded]

Yeah it feels like the game is talking down to you, like it doesn't believe you can pick up on the most basic social cues.

[@thant0s]

"Once you go in, you NEVER get out. But I may know a way out." Profound.

[@LizardSpork]

They don't have to worry about consistency in dialogue cos they know their audience will never remember.

[@TheKreativity]

I love dunkey

[@Spoutnicks]

Expectation subverted successfully

[@Grogeous_Maximus]

"One does simply walk into Mordor, actually."

[@TheKreativity]

@Grogeous_Maximus i don't think walking into Mordor is the difficult part of the experience but I haven't seen the movies or read the books so take my input with a grain of salt

[@romilrh]

Dunkey actually flipped on the Dementia feature in Accessibility Settings. Of course, he doesn't remember this, because he has dementia.

[@thatshadowguy1005]

dunkey doesn't have dementia! he got amneeeeeeeesiaaaaaaaa

[@onyxi.x5777]

The "Uh Oh" at EA was perfect

[@TheGlitterMan]

That's always a red flag. The sad is EA is still running because people keep playing EA sports AND buying micro transactions.

[@jamesdillan1928]

As someone who worked at EA, haha. This made me chuckle way too hard. We even made fun of it on the inside

[@jkop2214]

It was just spot on, here be trouble, haha.

[@beastboy4246]

that's how you know its gonna be a great dunkey video. right off the bat we get commentary

[@HurricaneBady]

EA is so horrid that i wonder how they were able to release good games before. Like Dead Space or Mass Effect (even then, the reputations of those games became controversial in the end)

[@SplittTwig]

Thank god they got the “squeeze through some rocks” animation. 10/10

[@Holy_Grapefruit]

It's not like that dwarf would've fit normally at all! Aint it amazing what triple A games do for us now?

[@beniwastaken]

That's AAA.

[@gehtsiegarnixan]

that's how you know it's AAA.

[@SLVYER1]

This will be GOTY because you can have post transition scars, not because of the story, plot, or mechanics. The inclusivity angle is getting as annoying as europeans having fantasy racism in there themes because they like it. Im playing a game, i dont want statement about the real world being said, especially when theyre basic ideas aimed at manipulating kids into liking something with a viel of progressivity. (Im not an anything dont be weaponised)

[@randomperson9732]

​@@SLVYER1What?

[@emperman]

"I am a writer" Someone at Bioware probably

[@planescaped]

BiowaEAre: What are your credentials? I write a lot on Twitter and ummm... I did a few erotic MLP fanfics. BiowaEAre: Himm.... Did I mention my hair is purple and I'm non-binary? BiowaEAre: YOU'RE HIRED!

[@Merumya]

did you know he was a writer?

[@blok--head7472]

They are known as Wright-Tor, the incoherent. My favorite character from Kings Quest.

[@nathanniesche6380]

"Creative writing is my passion!"

[@NOLNV1]

not anymore, they fired like 5 people per second these last few years

[@-delilahlin-1598]

Maybe becoming a video game writer isn't such an impossible dream, even for a dwarf.

[@prometheusproton3886]

But dwarves don’t dream, remember?

[@jayr7965]

@@prometheusproton3886 That's the magic of videogames! Oh wait...

[@deecee26x]

"Well, I didn't expect to fight an Ogre today. Guess that's something I do now. I'll probably find an artifact next" -Forspoken girl, probably

[@Knights_of_the_Nine]

They Ogre now?

[@modex13]

The ogre's standing right behind me, isn't he?

[@Sorenant]

Well, that just happened.

[@oposdeo]

Well THAT just happened. Next you'll tell me the ogre had an artifact or something. Could this day get any weirder? Umm, I guess I spoke too soon.

[@anwarnaveedali4412]

@@Knights_of_the_Nine THEY OGRE NOW

[@JamesHock]

"Well, the game launches. You gotta give em that" I love Dunkey

[@Mgauge]

Sad that this is an accomplishment these days.

[@jwstex]

@@Mgauge Agreeed,

[@nikobellic8002]

@@Mgauge It's also sad people cheer for this

[@joh1-z9j]

runs better then mhwilds which is also sad

[@RikkeDK1996]

jokes aside, i've seen people use that as a pro for the game and given it a positive review on steam. People have some seriously low standards these days

[@NikTek]

I see why IGN rated this Game 9/10... because it reminds you of the plot 9 times every 10 mintues

[@anyau]

p

[@Hpalhazred]

Like if 90% of the population had ADHD.

[@SETHRX7]

They probably wanted 11/10 but they didn't want to make players suspicious.

[@ivoivic2448]

gotta keep those game journos from losing track.

[@elmandalorian1255]

It has a little something for everyone - IGN 9.5/10

[@Crobian]

This game's writing is what happens when an employee copy pastes ChatGPT without Memory enabled

[@Hhhh22222-w]

Chatgpt writes better than this

[@DKGH124]

Saw a professional writer reviewing the dialogue say he didn't think it was written by AI because the AI would have a logical flow between lines of dialogue.

[@angel_of_rust]

This is not artificial intelligence. This is natural organic human stupidity. AI could never stoop down to Californian logic.

[@ALovelyLad]

No it was written by a ideological fool that takes his identity and others far too seriously

[@Alienrun]

@@Hhhh22222-w With careful prompting yes...but even then it can get kinda repetitive. Funny comment tho! lol :P

[@GusRokk]

Modern AAA experience: -forspoken dialogue -squeeze transitions -yes you can pet the dog

[@AlbertAlbertB.]

You forgot the squeezing through rockfaces part

[@moozipan]

#3 turns any game into a masterpiece and I won't accept any disagreement about that.

[@ItsRyanHello]

BUT DEY MADE GOOD CHARACTER CREATOR 9/10 IGN

[@Soulless-x4k]

Every AAA(A) CEO in Peter Quill father's voice: "yeah I know it sounds bad..."

[@stramlukt]

Still can't swim tho

[@andyrew72]

The guy got stabbed in the throat, but forgot he died…because he had amneeeeeeeeeesiaaaaaaaa

[@Imperyon]

Dayum....

[@yosefyonin6824]

everyone in this goddamn game have amnesia considering how often they need to recap the story over and over again

[@helwrecht1637]

He must have drank the amneeeesiaa water and used the jet pack to escape

[@Moravia90s]

A man of culture right there, ladies and gentlemen.

[@CuznLuvn69]

10 outta 10 callback

[@draphking]

“Erm an ogre? Didnt see that coming” This game is innovative because it caused my hair to grey in real time and accelerated my aging

[@RealKengeki]

Erm what the ogre

[@planescaped]

Well, _that_ ogre happened.

[@-Ano-Ano-]

erm... that just ogre'd wasnt expecting THAT

[@Dinakol]

Lol this comment made me chuckle too hard, thanks

[@theobell2002]

Sounds like something Alistair would say in Origins.

[@alexjandro831]

"I am a night elf mohawk" I've been watching you for quite a few years. I'm glad you quoted this.

[@christabelle__]

It's hilariously relevant at present too with the WoW anniversary bringing the night elf mohawk stuff back in game, lmao

[@Foxador]

God that was like a 18 year call back Mr T pity's the foo that plays this game

[@Ayundaru]

This game would be perfect with a laugh track

[@lemond2007]

It would be useful to know when we're supposed to laugh.

[@Wanky_Woop]

If someone adds a mod like this in the game i might even pirate it

[@Thatonedude917]

It has the makings of a "so bad it's good" game but I'd need to see more I'm a big fan of those kinds of movies, but games are usually mainly gameplay, and bad gameplay just sucks. It's rare to see one that's playable but has something so bad that it's worth seeing, even if just to gawk and laugh at. I might have waited for it to be on sale if I hadn't pledged to never give EA another cent

[@Autystyczny]

There are already videos of people adding laugh tracks to the dialogs of the game and it's hilarious

[@arsenelupin1854]

They need to put that on the next patch 😅

[@dyneeoh]

"I thought I was playing an INDIE game for a second" sheesh so glad that the developers put the squeeze transition in I wouldn't be able to tell otherwise

[@themoonsevilsister1561]

we need to start a thing where indie devs put a "squeeze through rocks" animation in every game, like the dog petting thing

[@d0onut]

Lowkey I love squeeze transitions

[@erikandersen3274]

@@d0onut Don't worry, I hate them enough for the both of us.

[@thegodofalldragons]

This should be the new Time to Crate. Time to Squeeze. Actually, no, don't call it that...

[@chiquita683]

Luckily he didn't find the mirror 🪞👀

[@JohnDoe-sq5nv]

Well, that just happened. Didn't expect that to just happen, or this, or that, or that thing. But it did. Just one of those days.

[@seigeengine]

I mean, it's generic, but it's a thing that might pass in a real world situation... but never in fiction. And if the writers can't tell that, they shouldn't be writing.

[@BradSamuelsPro]

Thanks ChatGPT

[@maskedbadass6802]

@@seigeengine I've met people like that, and those who talk like that are usually plagued by deep insecurities that make them afraid to say anything other than the extremely obvious for fear of being judged in any way. Also, "lol I am so dumb and isn't this awkward?" is the safest kind of comedy.

[@seigeengine]

@@maskedbadass6802 People say obvious cliche things because the function of language is communication. In real situations, there is a conveyance of substance such that a cliche line doesn't matter, but fiction is a deliberate construct of an unreal. There is no substance for the writing to lean on. As for insecurity, yes, people are insecure. Just about every single one of them. Different people just have different ways of coping with how pathetic and inadequate they feel.

[@707upsidedown]

Literally all of the dumb marvel tropes. Erm, the artifact is right behind me, isn't he?

[@TheApatheticGuy]

If this is what Bioware is up to these days, I'm finally okay with not having Kotor 3.

[@ValbrandrLeonhardt]

I just want the kotor 1 remake already. Saber Interactive said it wasn't cancelled, and they finally have a budget for it. Maybe we'll see it in 3-4 years

[@binjoofficial]

@@ValbrandrLeonhardt you really, really should temper your expectations then even if they leave everything story related completely intact - which honestly id say would be the best case scenario, seeing how these days their writing quality is "well I didn't expect to fight an ogre today" - I guarantee it's nowhere near as good as you remember. in fact, if you try playing the original today, you'll find it borderline unplayable, and the story besides That Twist is incredibly generic space fantasy that's about 67% clichés and 33% filler KOTOR 2 is the good one (story wise), you only remember the first one fondly cause it was the second ever star wars game that wasn't TOTAL trash

[@sirjanska9575]

@@ValbrandrLeonhardt I don't even care for that. I just want someone to port the original game to modern hardware with 4K support and a hud that scales properly.

[@ValbrandrLeonhardt]

@@binjoofficial bioware isn't in charge of the kotor remake. It was picked up by Sony, and after passing through development hell, is currently being worked on by Saber Interactive.

[@twocows360]

@@binjoofficial they were both good and i say this as someone whose favorite game is kotor 2. kotor 1 isn't particularly deep or anything but it's a solid star wars game that does what it intends to do very well.

[@simonawad9656]

The writing for this game is like how I write when I’m trying to hit a word count

[@josetato]

Yooooo yes! Holy shit that’s accurate

[@fly7188]

thats exactly what they did

[@Ckoz2829]

If I wrote a paper like this in college, I’d be shot by my teacher.

[@M3xP4nd4]

"This game will make you FEEL like you have short-term memory loss" - IGN -

[@MelanismSeis]

"This game will make you FEEL like this game will make you FEEL like.."

[@Malkezar86]

Which is good because everyone has amneeeeesia

[@Gawillamon]

9/10

[@TheRealTriforceHero]

The world’s first recap type game! Video game genres are getting crazy.

[@zioniczenko]

They need to recap in case... you got amnesia.

[@MrWizardGG]

The recap is standing right behind me, isn't it

[@ProffessorDrPatrick]

Also the world's first quadruple recap-type game!

[@greedowins]

This is a recap-type game. Standby for me to repeat this.

[@xQQxAspyx]

I was expecting another install-type game considering how this video started and was only five minutes again. Developers just don't stop getting creative with these new genres!

[@Yorishiriamori]

This game is written like a Dora the explorer episode and im not even kidding lmao

[@Arcelux]

" What writing experience do you have?" " I make Twitter posts" " You're hired!"

[@personaignota]

"I wrote fanfic on Tumblr." "You're promoted to narrative designer!"

[@rainblue4789]

@@personaignota nah fanfic authors write way better than this these "writers" have never directly engaged with anything roleplay related in their life

[@sonkeschmidt2027]

There are good moments of writing in there. Don't know if they had multiple writers, higher ups being very involved in the writing. Wrong type of game for the writer. Don't know but it's not all bad.

[@im_Smitty]

They hired people to write this game? I thought it was AI

[@zomgwtfpewpewpewpew]

I watch marvel movies for the jokes

[@CsubAzUrmedve]

this is the best type of storytelling, because you will quit, because the dialogue sucks ass, and when you return, they tell you exactly what happened in the story up to that point every time

[@TerminalM193]

This is why I'm personally a fan of fromsofts way of storytelling. It can be as little to the absolute max of storytelling and it's completely up to you on how you want to digest the story.

[@stavidjenkins]

That's the problem though. Your second mistake was returning!

[@GG-ou7it]

If you buy any modern bioware game you deserve to lose your money 😂

[@ormar4564]

@@TerminalM193 yeah Metal Wolf Chaos was the best storytelling of all time

[@visual_Memories]

The first quitting-type game

[@EpicBeard815]

It won "Game of the year" because its the only game this year that was able to boot up

[@bradtheorange]

Animal Well was robbed. Top tier, even if you don't know about Dunkey

[@captainspaulding5963]

It "won" because the devs paid Geoff enough to buy the win ;)

[@PlatinumAltaria]

It really is wild that you can just release games that don't work and not be sent to jail.

[@TTwentyjuan]

This isnt gonna win goty over wukong, even objectivley speaking

[@Geffi01]

not yet. Wouldn't surprise me though 🤣

[@friedkin71]

So that just happened. 10 seconds later. So that just happened.

[@evrynameistaken5]

what dragon age always needed was more sarcastic characters that constantly talk in an upward inflection with dialogue like they were brainwashed by joss whedon

[@simonsnowden654]

Dragon Age of Ultron

[@daniel_dumile]

the key to getting a female audience is hiring female writers!

[@Deliveredmean42]

@@daniel_dumile I guess they are still searching for a good female writer?

[@1stCallipostle]

​@@Deliveredmean42Well they also can't have women that are attractive, remotely edgy, or non-misandrist. Because those make the undesirables feel bad to have on the team.

[@ccc2839]

Morrigan in DAO was sarcastic most of the time and Alistar often throw some joke the difference is back then the writter didnt suffer blight corruption

[@Cameron368]

Dunkey's complete disdain for clunky exposition and dialogue is my favorite running joke on this channel

[@Taima]

It's one things when games are a little awkward about it but this game takes the repetitive, insulting ass nonsense to a new level. Even some people who think the game isn't shit are complaining about it. It's so obnoxious. Only watching as little as I have has irritated the shit outta me.

[@My_dad_owns_Club_Penguin]

It's extra sad here because DA has had far better writing in the past. But with all that "I wasn't expecting to fight an *ogre* today xD" and "It's... kinda my thing- fixing magic stuff" it seems DA has gone full cheese... EA's right behind me isn't he

[@calenthebard2051]

(Soft , menacing voice) i t ' s i n t h e g a m e ​@@My_dad_owns_Club_Penguin

[@Dogsineed]

Disdain*

[@ickyfist]

I think everyone hates the exposition in this game. Every time that asian elf talks it's like a scene out of a 2020 marvel side movie. Shit was made for people whose brain was rotted by HRT.

[@La_Scaille]

Fun fact: dwarves don't dream. Another fun fact: dwarves don't dream.

[@Altair584]

but why? I have a theory

[@brunoyuji9203]

Dwarves also can't swim, or use magic. Did I mention that dwarves can't dream? But let's get back to the important part the artifacts may be artifacting some artifaction. So we need to make sure you understand that dwarves can not dream.

[@thegoldencaulk2742]

But what about magic? Can dwarves use that?

[@elementengine]

Sounds like dwarves in Dragon Age kinda suck ass

[@TheLethargicWeirdo985]

They also can't be possessed! And they can't dream too!

[@valchan2258]

I was actually dying laughing at some of this dialogue. Was that dudes explanation for surviving getting stabbed in the throat really "I've had worse"? thats actually peak comedy

[@MarianMetanoia]

I thought the same.

[@foolisnoteighteenyet]

Tis but a scratch!

[@codysellers4151]

Tbpf Varric isn’t actually there, Solas is playing tricks with Rook’s mind, but yeah the dialogue still sucks. lol.

[@panhandlep]

They were going to talk more about artifacts but, once again, Sephiroth intervened.

[@MariaYuri-qo8jy]

Maybe he is a good guy after all.

[@ALFASKWODRUN]

@@MariaYuri-qo8jyI mean, we still don’t know Sephiroth

[@RRRRRRRRR33]

But the Whisperers, uuuuuuhhhh, so mysterious, the Nomuraverse

[@Moonflush]

eu a ia i ia e ei i eu a ia i ia e ei i Sephiroth!

[@ItsMrBozToYou]

Somehow, Sephiroth returned.

[@Jurgen-h5b]

This game really makes you FEEL like you’ve got amnesia

[@Taima]

Amnesia Age

[@Jas0n2571]

hahah that's a good one! Btw, do you know that the elven gods Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain have escaped?

[@TheLethargicWeirdo985]

The artefact is sure to cure your amnesia! Have you heard of the artefact?

[@MaxAngor]

It's just a burning memory.

[@CarlDeer]

@@AthrenAntimony It doesn't if you don't buy it and pretend DA ended with Inquisition.

[@Crunchatize_Me_Senpai]

Yay another “snarky teenage girl” character dropping 2002-style one-liners. We don’t get enough of those!

[@terribleivan1475]

It’s just like my annual marvel movie! Without any of the acting chops or established characters to make it work! Woohoo!

[@JonnyCrackers]

2002-style one-liners that weren't funny in 2002 either.

[@planescaped]

@@JonnyCrackers Seriously, they were meant to be endearingly lame back then. Now they're just lame lame.

[@LordVader1094]

2002-style one-liners would legitimately be better than this

[@_Stormfather]

2002-style lines in a game with a medieval fantasy setting

[@brenmend]

the second an indie game comes out with full squeeze-through-narrow-passage technology, we'll have entered a new age of gaming.

[@vacuousvulpes]

It's so lovely of them to cater to the older Dragon Age game series fans who may have Alzheimer's disease.

[@Brittanysplittany]

That would be nice to not know how far Dragon Age has fallen

[@SorqO]

Hey! I resemble that… what were we talking about? Who are you again?

[@nerio1227]

Devs even forgot Inquisition was a thing. No wonder they treat others the same way.

[@nikobellic8002]

Joe Biden is big fan of this series and he would love it.

[@Based_n_Boredpilled]

Did all the fired Marvel writers get jobs at Bioware?

[@hoeraufist]

My theory is that all the writers are English majors from coastal cities, mostly from California. So, they only know that way of interacting with the world and it's all they can write.

[@matheuscalonga8860]

​@@hoeraufist im not even from the us yet, i can vizualise that theory very well.

[@planescaped]

@@hoeraufist All fiction is slowly turning into modern day Los Angeles, Seattle and Portland.

[@SpaceChicken]

@@planescaped I’m from Oregon. This is accurate.

[@Bulbmin300]

The actually fire their writers??

[@fttmvp]

Jar Jar Abrams levels of dialogue and writing.

[@BatteryBee]

"Meesa love lens flares!"

[@Hypnotically_Caucasian]

Joe Biden levels of writing

[@jonathancharron7360]

Touch grass please

[@misanthropicservitorofmars2116]

@@jonathancharron7360you’re telling that to the devs, right?

[@jonathancharron7360]

@@misanthropicservitorofmars2116 no, these dumb commentors

[@PapaJohnsPie]

“I thought I was playing an indie game here” definitely the most underrated line in this video

[@jabronii]

the story is written like a teenager padding an essay

[@user-ly2ll5od1r]

sooo it's written like an average video game rpg?

[@jadsonrafael1635]

You don't play that much rpg do you?

[@DizietSma69]

it's really just the onboarding that's so infantilizing, it gets so much better later on

[@M0M0M0M0M]

​@@DizietSma69 no, it doesn't get better

[@DizietSma69]

@M0M0M0M0M I'm literally 15h in and it gets SO much better, that Dragon Age feeling is back once it opened up, the progression is extremely satisfying and mastering combat is genuinely amazing. Just had a really cool fight against a blighted champion and it felt like Dark Souls. The thing that was worst at the beginning, the writing, also gets better and back to the level we're used to with the older Dragon Age games. The moment I wake up I can't think of anything else but wanting to continue playing, the last time this happened to this degree was with Elden Ring.

[@GNackers53]

All I've learned from this playthrough of Veilguard is that dwarves can't have sh**!

[@Koozwad]

it's EA's way of saying: "if you're short, you aint gonna make it"

[@grogueQ]

Dwarfs can't take a sh** either.

[@sh_i_ro]

this game really makes you FEEL like you're having a stroke

[@Ind3r98H]

The developers knew how fried an average person's dopamine receptors are and they considered brainrot as well while making the game. So they made sure to remind us about the plot every few minutes. Too bad that they actually forgot to make the game to go with the plot.

[@rainkloud]

I'm surprised he didn't mock the stiff and inexpressive facial animations for the protag. They remind me of how someone acts when they realize they have a massive oncoming bowel movement and they have to devote 90% of their mental capacity to avoid crapping their pants, leaving only 10% for things like emoting.

[@terribleivan1475]

Yes! Nobody’s mouth moves enough for the words they’re saying!

[@cv5953]

You didn't have to call me out like that

[@rainkloud]

@@cv5953 Sorry mate, I didn't think you frequented this establishment

[@SyphroPlays]

It's bioware. Mentioning the stiff facial animations would be like beating a dead horse.

[@naosou921]

That is strangely specific.

[@xenogorwraithblade2538]

"No, we gotta go this way. There's probably ten gold over here somewhere." Damn, homie, ain't gotta call me out like that.

[@RRRRRRRRR33]

Level design that makes Hollow Knight look insignificant

[@Weasel6]

Finally a game that’s entire narrative was made in a high school creative writing class.

[@Weasel6]

@DavidCornish-cn1yq No thanks. Unlike the writers of the game I understand that I’m not a skilled writer.

[@LizardSpork]

​@DavidCornish-cn1yqOk here I go. "Once you go in, it's almost impossible to get out. Almost. I might know a way." boom, dialogue improved. You're welcome.

[@kenjutsukata1o1]

@@LizardSpork Or "they say once you go in, it's impossible to get out. But I might know a way." Literally just slight adjustments is all it takes. 'They say' takes it from fact to rumors, which fixes it. Or if they actually wanted to write something a little more engaging, they could have made it a little discussion. Character 1: "They say that once you go in, it's impossible to get out." Character 2: "They say many ignorant things." Character 1: "Are you saying you know a way out?" Character 2: "Perhaps. It is not certain, but I have reason to believe that I may have." Not gonna claim it's *good* writing, but I am going to claim it's better than the drivel that Bioware shat out onto paper.

[@Ssosmooth69]

As someone who took a creative writing class, this comment is painfully true. About 75% of the class’s writing was complete garbage. One of the stories I had to proofread was a MLP fan fiction of a self-insert hooking up with some guy named Sombra. That should have been burned.

[@KvapuJanjalia]

The Starfield Guy is farming this game to the fullest.

[@Asterra2]

The Dragon Age franchise earned its chops almost exclusively by being well-written. Now that they are no longer capable of clearing that hurdle, it's honestly kind of refreshing that they've decided to fully embrace their shortcoming by screaming it at us with every word uttered by every character.

[@namixxluxi]

Bro I'm sorry to tell you but the best one was origins 2 was mid 3 was lol Hell even awakening was kinda bad Sucks to say but they only got 1 right

[@Asterra2]

@@namixxluxi 2 still had good writing. It also got pushed out by EA over a year earlier than planned so the exploration component of the game was completely irredeemable. The point stands, though: What made the series good in the first place was the writing. If you took that away from DAO it would be this hollow RPG experience that possessed almost nothing to inspire people to play it, and the franchise would have died then and there.

[@phantomkrieger2744]

Well back to playing Skyrim with 300+ mods for the 15th time.

[@Hungarycloud]

DA:O is in my top 3 favourite games of all time. DA2 had its issues but still had a really engaging overall story and was good in its own way. I tried to play Inquisition twice and couldn't get through it. Characters, story, and writing quality went off a cliff. Not sure I'll even buy the new one, obviously the quality has been trending down for years.

[@christabelle__]

Blame EA, my friend. They kill every game franchise they pick up - turning them into low effort cash cows because for as many of us that see the trash? There are people who will still buy this stuff just because it says Dragon Age, or Bioware. There *is* no Bioware...just EA. Bioware is a slave to whatever EA wants...and they wanted the devs to gut the cool overworld changes that reflected Rook's choices in Inquisition. They wanted the devs to restart making the game three times. They wanted to underpay and overwork people just eager to work on a game they love. EA is a dogshit company. It's always morally correct to pirate EA games.

[@panzergott5622]

When people say Veilguard has bad writing. This is what they meant.

[@giantWario]

Old Bioware: Skip through the clunky combat to get to the awesome dialogue and story. New Bioware: Skip through the clunky dialogue to get to the combat that's cool sometimes.

[@thebigenchilada678]

New Bioware: * skip theough the clunky dialogue to skip through the *still* clunky combat.

[@t.t6294]

don't know if you've played the game but the combat is awful too. it's flashy but it's very repetitive and spammy. the skill lines are awful as well.

[@TheWretchedEgg12]

you can actually skip most of it as they will just tell you every other minute what happened so far lmao

[@Skylair95]

And yet, Origins has the best combat of the serie.

[@Rohtix]

Sounds like you need to skip the dialogue and combat. Huh, that saves me 70 bucks because I know EA ain't selling it for a penny cheaper

[@docproc144]

Seeing the dumpster fire that is Veilguard really just reminds you of how far BioWare as a developer has fallen and how good their games used to be back in the day. KOTOR, Dragon Age Origins and Dragon Age 2, and the Mass Effect trilogy. These guys were the gold standard for RPGs in the mid to late 2000s and early 2010s. Their games were known for their compelling characters and complex narratives. As a fan of these franchises, it’s sad to see the current state of BioWare now because they are clearly not the company they once were.

[@MC_Hammerpants]

As fellow OG fan I feel it's time to let all Bioware franchises go. Had to do same with Final Fantasy too myself. I look at as seeing every member in my favorite band replaced by 4 year olds. Wouldnt expect the band to make good albums anymore so we shouldn't expect Bioware to either. Don't think of it as sad. Enjoy the good ones for what they were because these franchises are already dead

[@noshjix2163]

That's the unshakeable stench of EA

[@sydniusalminia5364]

In the immortal words of Rich Evans "What's it like watching all your favorite childhood franchises crash and burn?"

[@Viceroy_Sundercles_III]

In the immortal words of Rich Evans: “AAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDDDDDDDDSSSSSSSS!”

[@peytonfryer5700]

AT STs AT STs!!!!!!!!!

[@carodar34]

good that new franchises rises all over the place with fun and good gameplay/stories

[@phantomkrieger2744]

“I paid rian Johnson to mow my lawn, he dumped a bunch of fertilizer and made all my plants grow larger, he told me he was subverting my expectations” Mr. Plinkett.

[@44milosLP]

It sure is great, I just can't wait for more.

[@fuzzypancake123]

"And somehow we're here!" "Yeah it's... unreal." Notice how she's saying that because the game is made in unreal engine. Very intelligent writing in this game.

[@theobell2002]

Absolute cinema!

[@bartz0rt928]

That's actually in the Terms & Conditions of the Unreal Engine. You use that engine, you have to have a line like that in your game or Epic will sue your balls off.

[@olwiz]

But the horror surprise plot twist- its actually frostbite But i havent had any frostbite in my playthrough yet

[@mavymagdowney9798]

You joke, but they actually seem to do meta comments like that many times, for example when you can't sprint when you're first walking alongside Varric the PC says "shouldn't we hurry?" lmao

[@nikobellic8002]

@@bartz0rt928 You are...kidding...right??

[@eli.k9190]

I had subway surfers on and family guy clip, while watching and I didn't miss a single story moment. Good job devs.

[@GeronimoOoO7]

This game truly makes you “feel” like you have mental illness

[@a.j.animations2235]

0:10 well it IS the year of the dragon

[@Kumire_921]

Sadly this one broke the streak since until now every "Dragon" title game this year has been awesome

[@nicollasrobertodepaulasilv4345]

No that game came out in 2000

[@Music34897]

Loong*

[@dafaeriequeene]

Oh you think you ate huh

[@Harpy-with-Legs]

I actually just forgot about that.

[@joelkang9550]

The amount of reiteration makes me feel like I'm watching netflix and the producers expect me to look at my phone half the time

[@NomadJedi]

Truly merciful of Dunkey to make a video that is only 5:33 long. Hearing these medieval fantasy characters speak like modern Americans make me want to commit a double Van Gogh.

[@giantent763]

I almost committed a double mustache man.

[@mavymagdowney9798]

I mean I know we conceptualize the medieval accent as a British one, but the American accent is actually closer to 18th century British pronunciation than modern British is! So I'm not sure but that might make the American closer to medieval?

[@ghandiwon]

​@@mavymagdowney9798I don't know for sure, but I'd be willing to be Nomad was referring to the *manner* of their speech, not the accent. At least in forspoken the girl *was* modern. This doesn't even have that excuse.

[@derek123wil0]

​@@ghandiwonso everyone should talk like withers

[@captaincomet9963]

Guys the game is in a made-up fantasy world, not medieval Earth. Calm down.

[@stanley13579]

These aren't fantasy characters. These are American college grads larping and spitting embarrassing dialogue. GOTY

[@joedatius]

100% the elf girl literally sounds like a collage theatre kid

[@AndyAtHome]

Based on this video I think that if I played through this full game my face would get stuck in a permanent wince expression.

[@XcutAngel]

3:18 "once you're in, you can't get out." [ sponge bob narrator says 2 seconds later ] "But I think I can find a way out."

[@MelanismSeis]

Even a shitty line like that could have been saved with an "unless.." plus a thoughtful look of the character rummaging through some books, papers or calculations. Not ideal, but far better than the actual scene.

[@Farat9622]

@@MelanismSeis Yea, true. There is no way out, supposedly.

[@BadVideoWatcher1]

​@@MelanismSeis Or even just "Normally once you're in..."

[@JohnDoe-gu4fz]

It's almost like the video cuts all the dialogue in between for comedic effect

[@Awesome-odavidson]

The writing and dialogue is so good it makes my body physically ill.

[@BboyFever]

Bioware to "barf"ware.

[@RoachDawggJR]

being spoonfed exposition by the mouthful is a really great way to make an engaging video game

[@amirmohamad2270]

Wow Never thought The Room would get a game adaptation. Tommy Wiseau would be proud.

[@Viceroy_Sundercles_III]

“Hahaha! What a story, mage.”

[@jjw9037]

At least the room was entertaining

[@subieguy4567]

This game really makes you FEEL like forespoken

[@nikobellic8002]

I moved sht with my freaking mind HA HA!!

[@bartolomeus441]

Second Forspoken type game

[@BrickedLego]

Can’t believe after 38 years they finally released a sequel to Dragon Quest

[@undecidedtoystore3003]

oh shit... I thought this was a sequel to How to Train Your Dragon..

[@TheArtOfKrieg]

4:39 "Yeah, okay, this is something I do now"

[@Juntou]

this game is called dragon age because by the time they finish recapping the story u will be about as old as a dragon

[@egaliseur8430]

fact: dragons are born old

[@drockopotamus1]

@@egaliseur8430 Did you know dwarves don't have dreams, tho?

[@SnipeGhost]

glad to know I’m not the only one that audibly gasps “uh oh” when i see an EA logo.

[@Love_of_Christ30]

This game really makes you feel like you have a traumatic brain injury and can't remember anything

[@8bitneslife1985]

Dragon Age Writers: "Yeah, writing cringey, mundane, and repetitive dialogue is kinda our thing."

[@TheCaliforniaHP]

This is amusing to see with the writing in how it repeats. One of the biggest rules an editor told me is like a rule of 2 to 3 max of the same word being used in a row. And 3 is pushing it. Instead of saying relic, trinket, mythical object, curio, etc... It's kind of funny lol

[@tyrus1235]

That's something I learned in school lol literally part of my basic education (in regards to writing essays and stuff) was learning to avoid repeating the same word several times. It's a bit of a common sense thing, though, as it's pretty annoying reading/hearing the same word again and again.

[@foxygrin]

The opposite trap is mentioning the same subject 5 times but using a synonym every time. You think you're doing the right thing not tiring the word out but it ends up sounding distracting and unorganic. I'd say a positive example would be for the girl to start talking about artefacts and then later say something like "I love curios of all kinds" instead of using 'artefacts' again. But using 'artefact' and 'curio' and 'magical item' and 'trinket' all in the same conversation while still talking about the same thing? I'd rather hear 'artefact' ten times in a row than be listed its synonyms.

[@Cheasle2]

I love all 3 of these people have an infinitely greater grasp on writing fundamentals than whoever wrote this game, and yet I guarantee they have some other profession. Who the hell hires people to write games this shit?

[@ultimaxkom8728]

And again it's moderation. Don't overdo either.

[@centali6551]

bigger brain moment would be not to even use it at all but the they’d have to fill the space with *checks notes* actually compelling character dialogue

[@Travotch]

0:22 Dragons Dogma 2 also released this year lol

[@marwynthemasterful6369]

Couldn’t believe he left it out.

[@planescaped]

Seriously, it is the most Dragon-type game this year! Someone check and see if Dunkey's gamer card is expired.

[@zioniczenko]

@@Travotch goodness, it's been a long year!

[@marwynthemasterful6369]

@@planescaped I almost unsubbed. Almost.

[@user-ot8wl7oh9s]

Game sucks ass he couldn't probably launch it that he forgot

[@scragglie]

this is the first "refund" type game, truly innovative!

[@Malefactor]

EA had such low faith in the end product they accounted beforehand they were shipping it without DRM, so they practically want you to pirate it.

[@tyr573]

​@@Malefactor is that why its their most successful game on steam 😂

[@flubberix]

As the Internet has said, the true option is to be nonbuynary.

[@jamiefenwick8359]

@@tyr573 No you see this game is bad and a failure because people who haven't played it heard some guy say he didn't like it.

[@declancampbell1277]

@@tyr573*most successful singleplayer release on steam. which STILL isnt really a boast, considering most of their games were origin exclusives at launch and only released on steam years later. Of the singleplayr games that did release on steam, they also released on gamepass so the likes of fallen order have way lower numbers on steam. People use such strange logic to cope about the game being terrible.

[@alectronaroi6994]

Dunkey's review is probably the most fun content related to this game. And the comments. I love you guys.

[@anomuumit]

It was a bold move from BioWare to go for the ESRB rating E for everyone with the story writing.

[@thedualitysystem]

Seriously. Like where is the sexy badass chick who swears like a xbox live lobby? I thought that was a staple of all RPGs.

[@mothbreeder641]

@@thedualitysystem She's now a plank that quips every 5 seconds.

[@1stCallipostle]

​@@thedualitysystemJRPGS have given up on revealing costumes and Western RPGs are giving up on profanity. I don't know how much identity will be left soon

[@realdoge1984]

@@1stCallipostle thanks for the laugh

[@Koozwad]

@@1stCallipostle to be fair the revealing costumes part is a good thing, as it's degenerate to sexualise and basically turns it into pr0n for coombrains it's just as bad as the woke, but in a different way we should just have healthy and somewhat attractive characters in a game that are not sexualised

[@ClowdyHowdy]

Dragon age: Talk at me like im 5 the whole time-guard

[@Ceber300]

Seeing what's been done to Dragon Age feels like nails in the eyes and ears

[@xdearlifex]

Eh, having played BG3 I'm starting to think they were never really that good and I just didnt have a good enough point of comparison.

[@noahleach7690]

@@xdearlifex true

[@TheOneGreat]

​@@xdearlifexOrigins was the only good one.

[@DriveCancelDC]

and to twist the knife further they went and dragged some characters from DA:O into this car wreck

[@xdearlifex]

@@TheOneGreat hot take, I hated it. It's full of cringy edgelord shit. The part I remember thr most clearly is the female city eld origin where every line of dialogue from the humans is "its rape o clock!"

[@spencer3598]

Why does EVERY GAME make you do the sideways shimmy through a crack in the wall??? It drives me crazy every time

[@DatBoi-mo9vc]

it's essentially a loading zone without having a menu, same as elevators in open world games.

[@ericdavis2875]

I read a review that said "the dialogue seems like it was written with HR standing in the room" and I think that's the best way to describe Dragon Age Veilguard.

[@yatheo2969]

I thought Starfield was the most sanitized experience but this is even worse somehow.

[@Fighton31]

Skillup is the man.

[@Fighton31]

​@@yatheo2969the writing was part of why I bounced off Starfield quickly. Probably makes this a hard pass then.

[@imtoogoodatpvp1252]

I read this comment on every video about dragon age failguard

[@d_all_in]

It's like an HR sensitivity training video was made into a game

[@brandondiaz9657]

This is a drinking type game. Every time someone says "Artifact", points out that dwarves can't dream, or points out that those 2 evil gods have escaped, you take a shot.

[@amannamedsquid313]

There isn't enough alcohol in the world.

[@captincorpse]

We are dead in the first hour

[@SKX996]

Does that make it also the first death from alcohol poisoning type game?

[@Gwilherm]

Play that game but with "ritual"

[@seigeengine]

Ah yes, I love to play "death by alcohol poisoning." Would recommend.

[@noredine]

Someone found out that the character heads are a bit too big compared to their bodies, and I haven't been able to unsee it since

[@gatotsu2501]

I thought that was on purpose because they’re dwarves or something lol

[@Bro-dot-]

But if you measure them proportionally they aren’t, unless you make it so or it’s a dwarf which is one to two head length shorter.

[@mothbreeder641]

@@Bro-dot- There are better ways to defend the game than "I don't know how humans look".

[@Bro-dot-]

@@mothbreeder641 Buddy we can talk anatomy if you really want to get technical, and i do character design for a profession so a bold claim there. I can go in game right now screenshot the characters and check their head length proportions for you. Do you want me to cause I can?

[@AngryKittens]

@@Bro-dot- Oh yeah? I have a degree in head.

[@cybersosis]

ok something positive. the hair animations are god damn great

[@RRRRRRRRR33]

This reminds me people talking about Final Fantasy 15, lol the story is awful, the open world sucks, the combat sucks... but goddamn, look at those haircuts!

[@StoopsyDaisy]

"this game's made for nobody" -Psychic Pebbles

[@Austrveg]

Hes wrong, its made for redditors

[@DragoneyeVII]

@@Austrveg Redditors arent people though

[@angelodonte]

I disagree, it’s made for those who have amneeeeesiaaaa

[@leebard9335]

"These writers should go on strike to get paid more."

[@hovis2000]

he's right behind me isn't he ahh dialogue

[@theobell2002]

Literally sounds like something Alistair would say in Origins, tbh.

[@planescaped]

@@theobell2002 You're right... but it was a bit more tolerable before *everything* started to sound like that thanks to Marvel/Disney.

[@giantent763]

@@planescaped Also it was only Alistair that said stuff like that. It was a part of his unique personality, and he was serious when he needed to be.

[@anwarnaveedali4412]

Perfect example

[@invidatauro8922]

Yes. Because that was Alisters character. But he was the only one that acted like that, because that was his unique character, and he would often get made fun of by other party members for acting like that

[@Nathan-en9dn]

First time I saw gameplay. Can't believe this is what 200 million budget looks like now.

[@CheeseOfMasters]

Inflation truly hits hard.

[@adity-m2g]

Crazy how Black myth wukong was made in $50 million

[@dorphlthewise1]

I mean if it takes 400 mil to make Concord, nothing can shock me anymore.

[@JirenFan123]

@adity-m2g Yeah, that's also crazy to realise. With those stock UE5 assets and uninspired level design and combat, one would think that Black Myth Wukong was made with a budget of ~150k and with a devtime of a year at the very most.

Being as no one is saying the name of the elephant that has destroyed the room, I will. Wokes.

[@TedCruzMissile331]

Ngl the Indian elf having a straight up 7-11 cashier accent GOT ME ROLLING 😂😂😂

[@robertjellen248]

1:40 I can’t believe they did this with no loading screens

[@ulabula1680]

Bethesda in shambles

[@4Core100]

Because there is just one planet (lame). Todd won again.

[@ViktorVonGhoulie]

🇨🇳

[@DrooledOn]

@@4Core100if only you could explore a entire planet I starfield without a loading screen.

[@AngryKittens]

Dwarves don't dream.

[@anonesteban]

This is a great time to mention that the 1981 hit film “time bandits” is available to watch on streaming. And it has tons of dwarves

[@jeremyphillips3087]

Dwarves are tight.

[@galeng2569]

Did you know dwarves can't use magic?

[@Bobba_raekus]

@@galeng2569 I did not know that, but I know dwarves don't dream. They also can't use magic.

[@BboyFever]

@@jeremyphillips3087 But are they hardly an inconvenience?

[@bluecloud4652]

I thought people were exaggerating the dialogue being bad

[@user-ly2ll5od1r]

The writing is on par with 99% of other video games released in this gen apart from baldurs gate, cyberpunk and maybe gow ragnarok. This is pretty much on par with everything else. Like to me this looks completely and utterly indistinguishable from hogwarts legacy, yet one of these is bashed more than it deserves and the other is praised more than it deserves. People would be eating this mid slop up like any other game of it's type if it didn't happened to become a target for the anti-woke culture war tourists.

[@Sonichero151]

I like a bit of camp and cringe in my dialogue. It what makes man *A MISERIBLE LITTLE PILE OF SECRETS*

[@TheWretchedEgg12]

you can forget about all that trans and pronoun stuff, its not really that bad. But the bad dialogue just keeps unfolding the more reviews come out, its so shallow and cringy

[@Asterra2]

@@user-ly2ll5od1r When the dialogue is so bad that with every conversation you are actively hoping it's minimized so as not to excessively distract from whatever's keeping you playing the game, that's just not the defense you think it is. When the dialogue used to be what gave the franchise its credentials, and _still_ takes up more than half of the total gameplay even in a poor entry like this one, that's just not the defense you think it is. Half of your $70+ purchase is spent on the dialogue that 99.9% of folks are making fun of. Is that cool?

[@DestroyedArkana]

@@TheWretchedEgg12 The current year identity politics IS that bad in this game, it's shoved right in your face

[@artefaktbarny5728]

3:47 I HAVE BEEN SUMMONED