THIS is why narcissists give SILENT TREATMENT! 😡It's them - not you!

[@DrEmilyMayfield]

Have you decided to go no contact for your own sanity and mental health but wonder if you are giving the silent treatment too? Learn more about the difference between no contact and the silent treatment here! kzbin.info/www/bejne/f4HVhoOPg7uekMk

[@Music1art]

I think no contact, as the situation allows, is the best way to deal with the narcissist's silent treatment. After all, we must understand that the narcissist and us, are meant to part and go opposite ways in life.

[@navydogsadventures3500]

I don't mind it. I don't need to talk. It is peaceful and relaxing.

[@HEALTHEDIVISION]

I find it HILARIOUS to watch the narc - the grown up, 60 year old narc - act like a four year old who didn't get what they wanted for Christmas. It used to bother me. Now I find it entertaining.

[@aleciawimer8506]

It’s a temper tantrum when they didn’t get their way. It’s an attempt, and I say, attempt, to gain superiority.

[@chinadoll534]

Sounds about right.

[@casperinsight3524]

It's a power play through punishment to gain the upper hand . It's actually a welcomed reprieve from their constant soapbox 😉

[@nad_carethusiast]

My narcissist cousin is giving me a silent treatment and i responded with blocking her instead. She aint that important..

[@FK-cg8el]

Well done

[@Dajahgraves]

LMAOOOO

[@lanashowler5906]

Lmao well i bet that knocked her down a few pegs... 😂. Nice one... No narcisist is important.. They know inside they are the shit kickers in society... And will never be anything more. :)...

[@Candy-O1776]

I did the same exact thing. I’m over these games. She did it for one year last time. When I told her how bad she hurt me by doing this, she laughed. She didn’t take a sick cat to the vet, and had her daughter take it. Told me to call her daughter, I did and I was given a text with $500 on it. They wanted me to offer to pay it, no. They didn’t ask, it was a set up, of if I didn’t offer, she’d give me the treatment again. I tried to explain I was talking to her daughter trying to find a vet for under a hundred, which I did. Mom said the kid took her to Blue Pearl, cause the kid didn’t know where to go. It’s not my fault the cat died. I told her it was really sick on Thanksgiving but she didn’t take it to the vet. She knew this was the first Christmas I was excited about Christmas and bought she and her two girls lots of cool gifts. The expectation for $100 every time there is an occasion is ridiculous. She sent me a text saying she was just going to be spending time with her family. Right there she was telling me I wasn’t part anymore. Merry Christmas.

[@wallymarcel1]

I’ve got one of those cousins too, but I’m not blocking her. I’d rather have her try to hoover me, then ignore her.

[@CynthiaAva]

I definitely think the silent treatment is an attempt at regaining some kind of power or control they think they have lost. It's a punishment for not bowing down to them and following the playbook. To me, it means peace and calm.

[@lisav8443]

@@CynthiaAva It’s amazing how much better one can cope with a NARC once it is understood about their behavior rather than being confused all the time and thinking it’s YOU.

[@debraanchante3661]

OR.. the narcissist uses the silent treatment because they know it hurts you and they’re sadistic and enjoy doing that.. they’re sick.

[@yvetteandjorgenlarsen9753]

That's just part of it

[@Maria-mq8pe]

Two can play silent ~ the longer the silence the less likely I will be interested in that case good bye have a great life

[@faithing88]

The silent treatment taught me to self reflect and finally i became strong enough to live without them 😊

[@DrEmilyMayfield]

Silent txt

[@svwerner2877]

I’m working on doing that. He asked for divorce over a month ago. Has done nothing to pursue. Silent treatment has been happening for months. I wish I had enough $$$ to leave. 🙏 & working on what I’m going to do. Done with S.T. 38 years of marriage.

[@faithing88]

@@svwerner2877 I'm so sorry 😔 Please focus on yourself. Find what makes you happy, they want you spend everything you have on them, your emotions, your time, your best years, your empathy, they are vampires, please try find what brings you joy, pure into yourself, don't pay them attention, build yourself you will shocked how you will fall in love with yourself all over again, the strange thing about life is once you pay less attention to what affects you it stops being so troubling, start praying, read your bible, laugh alone.,

[@ruthbarnes9999]

It's exactly what I've just done with a friend who did it once too often. It's very hard and painful. But one reaches a point where one realises these people have no regards to us cause if they did they'd consider the hurt and pain they inflict by there silent treatment.

[@casperinsight3524]

Absolutely 👌🏼 It's a painful process to endure but once you've healed you don't want to pick that scab off to bleed again only to have to re- heal.

[@El-bz1tq]

You can do a lot to stop the silent treatment. You can refuse to take them back. POWER TO YOU.

[@rob_see]

that's what i did. she is blocked. i tried so hard to make it work. no more.

[@randy_cbc8811]

Yes, if we aren't careful, if we don't keep our wits about us, we can start thinking the Narcissist is like God, omnipotent and undefeatable, but this is not the case. We have more 'control' than we give ourselves credit for. We can say 'no', we have the freedom of choice; we need not be victimized by evil narcissistic abuse. For it, the manipulation and abuse, truly IS evil, and God is not on the side of evil.

[@mariethompson6288]

They want you to reach out to them so you can continue the endless cycle of toxicity. It's a trigger. Don't react! Don't reach out! Keep it ended. Move forward!

[@glenhoff1443]

There are some very mentally ill people out there called narcissists. It is so sad. Learn as much as you can about them before you become a damaged soul.

[@casperinsight3524]

Narcissists are damaged souls and if you find yourself entangled in involvement you will bounce back with therapy, education, self awareness and self help. You can heal if you do the work. You can recover from Narcissist Abuse or NA. You can put the pieces of humpty Dumpty back together again and you can even bounce back stronger and higher. It opens your eyes 👀 to a new way of seeing people in the world, it's an eye opening experience. It's a painful process of self discovery but a valuable lesson learned on many levels.

[@casperinsight3524]

Yes, It's best to avoid stepping in the pig pen and getting down and dirty wrestling in the mud. It's best to avoid interacting with Narcs but if you get sucked in to the ring you can step out of the ring. Once you know You Know Lesson learned.

[@Taqwah_Tawheed]

They always come back once they’re done with silent treatment and the only treatment they deserve and you can give them is forever silent treatment no contact

[@casperinsight3524]

Yes they tend to boomerang back around once you've regained your momentum, your focus, your drive and determination. Don't let them derail you, deter you, detour you down the same dead end 🤚🏼 You already been there done that with them, why would you want to go down that dark path again? You are not a sucker for punishmen, you are a Survivor 😅 Just say NO 🚫 no way hozay

[@carolovesteven]

It’s always about “supply.” Silent treatment is an effective way of not having to take accountability and to create uncertainty in the victim.

[@chinadoll534]

Yelp

[@Justem43]

100 % spot on

[@casperinsight3524]

Creates uncertainty, insecurity, self doubt, confusion, feeling isolated, rejected and abandoned, unloved, unsupported, unvalidated, unseen and unheard.

[@sallyclay1974]

Selfish, egocentric , sell centered , spoiled. Can be sadistic when They pout. They have to be in control at all times.

[@cjc5478]

they're not in control when they act like a little kid who didn't get the toy they wanted in their happy meal

[@SarahlabyrinthLHC]

My narcissist ex used the silent treatment on me for three months (we were living in the same house). He broke his silence when he saw me packing things into the car one morning. He deigned to speak then, saying "What are you doing?" My reply was "I'm leaving you and will get a divorce." And so I did. He didn't like that one bit. He had done the same on many previous occasions and it came to be more than enough, so I left. After 18 years.

[@mamaknow8056]

1 word.. bye! That’s what I said 🤣

[@SarahlabyrinthLHC]

That would work!@@mamaknow8056

[@chinadoll534]

Oh wow good for you. Sorry yall couldn’t work it out 😞

[@yvetteandjorgenlarsen9753]

What I don't understand about that story is why you said anything to him in reply. Let him figure it out on his own

[@yvetteandjorgenlarsen9753]

​@@chinadoll534work it out?😂 there's no working it out with a narcissist there's just more of the same hurtful behavior.

[@treatmenice1564]

The goal of the silent treatment is to teach you a lesson for not taking the narcs bullshit. The narc can't listen to reason so they cut you off knowing this will hurt you.

[@MisterFanwank]

I got a year of peace out of my silent treatment. Really wish he hadn't realized apologizing was enough to put me in the wringer again.

[@ImpulsoCreativo9322]

this is so true!

[@chinadoll534]

Sounds about right. But their actually the one that is hurting simply because too much effort and thought was put into no contact in reality

[@garycordle5295]

This is a part of grooming you to break you down it's a form of mental abuse, and once you give in they know they have you, it's all about power and control, it's testing the waters, you get a silent treatment give them one for life you don't deserve the bs because after the silent treatment comes so many more mind fck games, blame shifting gas lighting you etc 👍 Dr Emily and survivors and thrivers 🦋

[@Ikaros23]

The silent treatment is the perfect momentum to cut the narcissist out for life. That is go " no contact".

[@garycordle5295]

@@Ikaros23 I used the time to try and understand what I was dealing with myself I had no idea, I KZbin everything and once I learned I eventually went no contact,it was a great awakening and the pandemic I took advantage of going no contact 👍

[@Ikaros23]

@@garycordle5295 Once we know who they are... that is " a narcissist". And they`re main goals " narcissistic supply" and " control" . Then it`s more easy to go no contact or to use the grey rock method. The hard part is to see that they are always just using " masks". The mask of " the hero" ( they think they are superior to others , " Victim" ( acting like the victim) " the mirror mask" ( pretenting to love what we love, hate what we hate... and lovebomb).. And there is the " true person" behind them... The anger, manipulating, gaslighting, silent treating sadistic/insecure/asshole. Once we see that the masks are simply a illusion and that the rageing maniac is the true self of the narcissist. Then cutting these assholes out of our lifes is the most healthy thing we can do. Even if it is our own parent or even our adult child.

[@apontutul]

Yeah gave one for the life... Blocked her from everywhere

[@Ikaros23]

@@apontutul Good!. Also burn the pictures, and reframe the memories. That is remember that the " good times", where just lovebombing/flattery/fakery/Con artistery. The narcissist don`t love us now. The narcissist has never loved us in the past. And they never will love us in the future. And the person we loved. Never existed. We loved a illusion. Stay out. And never look back. And remember that you are not alone in taking these brave steps. I`m also taking them, and so are millions of other survivors of these warped "humanoid" actors

[@tinam2696]

My brother (golden child turned narcissist) has stopped talking to me about 5 times. He comes back when he wants to. I walk on eggshells until he stops talking to me again.

[@g-dcomplex1609]

after my ex gave me the silent treatment for last time, i simply blocked her in all ways i could think of, i completely shut her out, and stop her silent treatment games, once they start the silent treatment, time to go away from that person. they will never respect your time or loyalty regardless

[@KR-pp7wp]

So they don't have to face accountability. They are cowards. My ex owes me ALOT of money. His cowardly way out is to lie, manipulate and deceive. When that didn't work and he was exposed he pulled the silent treatment. I see a grown man with a pacifier in his lying mouth, crying to mummy.

[@cjc5478]

i agree ... I'm a 50 year old man myself and these kinds of men are infantile !

[@sleeperno1215]

I have learned to out silent the silent treatment. They use what would hurt them. Silence hurts them because it denies them significance. I am able to take my power back and use it to enforce a boundary.

[@gwendolynwehage6336]

I once told my narcissist I didn't want to hear any excuses they went silent interpreting "no excuses" as "no talking at all", further solidifying their refusal to discuss things. It is common for them to take one little thing you said and take it to the extreme they knew you didn't mean.

[@thatomalebo5338]

I was told that things are good between us until I start thinking, implying that using my brain is the problem. Imagine!

[@KarinStrong-k4j]

It’s definitely all about them getting a sense of control and to get the victim to react which supplies them. Our reaction to it makes them feel powerful. It’s rather pathetic.

[@sonderman8079]

I think you have described silent treatment exactly as I have experienced it for 15 years of living with my wife. It only ever ends if/when I give in where she feels she's in control. Pure evil! No regards for my young son. What disgusting human beings.

[@theteal123]

Everything that you said is so true. I am in the 3 week silent treatment and blocked for 3 weeks. This is nothing new. He has given me the silent treatment for 9 months in the past. This is very unhealthy and disrespectful for the recipient and I am over it. I need to move on. This narc will never change.

[@CynthiaAva]

It's mental abuse. But remember, they have the emotional maturity of a toddler. Very sad. Best to stay away and focus on our own healing.

[@amymalina5073]

Wishing you strength in moving forward and putting this person in your past--for good! Better times and people await you! ❤️

[@simjam1980]

Trust me, they just keep doing it until you are broken, and then the last silent treatment they will leave you in confusion and run off with someone else. Don't keep hurting yourself. They can't love.

[@yvetteandjorgenlarsen9753]

He did it for 9 months in the past? Why are you still making yourself available to him?

[@joanbistry5939]

The silent treatment is also about payback. The person is angry and knows the silent treatment causes pain.

[@lisabyl3240]

It's really so childish of them to go silent. Life is too short to put up with any cra from anyone! Unfortunately sometimes you dont find out until you're either already married or involved in deep with one. It's meant to frustrate. Its pathetic

[@margaritagomez3490]

On my 5th silent treatment, each time a bit longer. I’ve learned to just let it happen and do me. Usually means they are with / or taking to someone else.

[@DrEmilyMayfield]

Definitely focus on you!

[@courtneyawalsh]

When they find new targets? Enjoy the peace. And pray for the new supply.

[@piscesnationearthangel]

So, in other words, if they go silent, then you have inflicted some form of narcissistic injury to them. That’s a win!Instead of looking at them being silent as some form of torture to you, know that they are silent b/c you have delivered a blow that they can’t handle! ❤❤❤❤

[@karencassata2520]

A lot of time, it’s because of new supply!

[@CynthiaAva]

Yes, the narc in our lives recycles supply. They focus on one person or a couple at a time...and go in a cycle. Repetative. Narcissists are basically stuck in a loop.

[@panfried7566]

04:06 - "The more the silent treatment happens, the more likely you are to take responsibility sooner as a way to relieve the tension". this is a subtle, yet very effective form of manipulation to achieve control. I wanted peace, so I acquiesced. looking back, that was not the "healthy" way to handle it. thanks, doc!

[@DrEmilyMayfield]

You are not alone! It is so much easier in the moment to acquiesce. No, it isn't the best way to handle the situation but it worked for you in the moment1 So happy you are finding other ways to respond.

[@amelittaberretta9109]

The silent treatment from two individuals has been on for decades! The emotional damage and pain on me has been phenomenal, to say the least.

[@tinac6114]

Mine has gave me the silent treatment for 3 weeks now. Last time it was for 5 months! Last time I hadn't figured out yet he was a Narc. This time I told him "no" to a boundarie he was trying to push so he's ghosted me. He did admit in his anger he's been talking to someone else also. It bothered me at first...his silence...but now thinking...oh well...better luck to the other girl.

[@Itsallgood-l5y]

I went through this in my marriage, silent treatment for a week, or two or three. Then ghosted. He was calling my adult kids telling them I was the problem. I get it now. But my kids are hateful to me.

[@hadiitiniguez2393]

I ignored my ex wife when she gave me the silent treatment. I did not give in, hence divorce. I'm Free!

[@JP-sg1xb]

It's not a time out if they just stop talking to you and don't tell you anything about their actions.

[@tbunnyshy1]

My mother does this. She is addicted to “excitement”, so to speak. She is making everyone sick. As the scapegoat, I get it the worst but handle it the best. I go on with my day, do not over-explain ANYTHING, do not volunteer any news or info, etc. I don’t exist, more or less. Silence CAN be peaceful. It just gets a bit hard after WEEKS go by. She is committed to inflicting pain on others.

[@nicholecornes1915]

Dont ever go back you WONT come back out the same!

[@josedopwell9645]

"SILENCE PREVENTS OPINIONS." Well put.

[@casperinsight3524]

They Silence you 🤐 to keep you mute So they don't have to hear or see 🙈 their wrongdoings One day you no longer have anything to say 😉👋🏼

[@lisaveale6897]

This is the first time I have heard anything about the rationale behind a narcissist's silent treatment. My mother initiated the silent treatment towards me in 1997, and it only ended when she died 1 year ago. It was absolutely devastating for 25 years. 3 out of 4 of us kids experienced this with her, and my father didn't bother with any of us either, passing away 2 years before my mum and never bothering to make contact. The only sibling talking to them took total control of everything to do with their lives and aging during that time and was very secretive and controlling. It has been a heartbreaking experience with no explanation, but this video has resonated with me completely and helps a bit. Thank you, will follow and subscribe!!

[@cristianateodoru5808]

Hope you heal! 🙏

[@annastolpe2292]

My whole childhood was a long silent treatment interupted by verbal and physical abuse. As a child I remember thinking that to be seen I had to do something and to be good ses never good enough. How can a mother think this will benefits anyone

[@LordImagawaYoshimoto]

My girlfriend is doing this to me now after we just talked about this and she promised to improve.

[@robertwalker6301]

They always promise to improve its a lie and a means to keep u believing a convenient lie that they tell u to keep u on the runaway crazy train going 80 mph with no brakes and the bridge is out

[@parrymylogicthen290]

The best way to counter it is to go no contact! It's not you, it's them!

[@angelakeely5859]

Well he will never get the chance to use the "Silent Treatment" on me again, thankfully , the reason I feel they use this tactic is to gain back control over you, make you toe the line, its incredibly manipulative.😏🚩🏃‍♀️

[@Freethnkr]

Whatever the reason....I'm living my best life unbothered..... Thanks for the break, I get tired of babysitting & micromanaging adults...

[@garyrobinson8665]

My narc ex girlfriend ghosted me a month ago because I wouldnt buy her a gift. I've now blocked her. I had a feeling I was being used anyway recently. I also noticed red flags. I thought she was just strange. She was asking for gifts on a regular basis. She lacked empathy and affection. Lacked interest in my life. Never really had deep conversations it seemed robotic and scripted from her side. She never took an interest in my hobbies or my job. She never asked me anything like what's your favourite movie, music, colour etc mundane stuff like that. Best friend died a few months ago. She never brought it up or asked me how I was coping.

[@garyrobinson8665]

@@thepaintedcupcake1578 it hurts. I loved her dearly. It hurts that I was being used the whole time. I will get over it eventually.

[@garyrobinson8665]

@@thepaintedcupcake1578 i knew her for over 20 years. I'm pleased i know she's a narc because it makes it easier to get over her. Ghosting me hurt. I still don't have an explanation but she was upset that I wouidnt get her a gdr this one time. 20 years ended in silence. I was doing all the pursuing making all the effort I was getting nothing in return

[@garyrobinson8665]

@@thepaintedcupcake1578 she's not coming back into my life again. I know she's trying to punish me she's done it before. This time im not falling for it. I won't be used. I've blocked her number and email. I refused to buy her a cd. I was tired of buying gifts. I was blinded by her beauty and the love bombing in the beginning. We split up for a number of years then she hoovered me in 2019 and love bombed me again she also breadcrumbed me. She ghosted me in January. I can't have her back and pretend to be ignorant it's impossible. She's betrayed me. I hope you sort out your issue. If I were you I'd cut the person out of your life but I know it's not easy.

[@garyrobinson8665]

@@thepaintedcupcake1578 i don't understand how a person can treat someone like that. Her emails will be sent to my junk mail. She'll probably know cos I've made no effort to contasct her since January. In the past I'd call round her house and blow up her phone if we had an argument. If I were you I'd go no contact with your partner. You deserve better. Don't chase. They know what they are doing it's cruel.

[@garyrobinson8665]

@@thepaintedcupcake1578 i thought my ex was perfect if a little strange. She wasn't nasty to me just a lack of empathy and interest. A bit socially awkward. If we had a disagreement she would not argue with me she would ignore me for a few days. I had no clue it was narcissism. Cut this guy out. Don't waste your time waiting for him to get back to you. He won't change. Don't waste 20+ years of your life like I did.

[@l.5832]

My narc mother was queen of the silent treatment. Unfortunately I did not know anything about narcissism 50 years ago. Very damaging to a preschooler for their parent to pretend they do not exist. And she could continue it for days until she was satisfied she 'won'. Now mom is dead, and my narc sister carries on her legacy. She has gone a year and a half without speaking or contacting and it is my guess that she will never speak to me again. I really have no idea why they hated me......

[@CynthiaAva]

My brother learned this from the narc that raised us. Unbothered and undisturbed. When they need or want something, they resurface. lol

[@dennisassini-pw2ic]

They don’t hate you. Basically they dislike themselves. That’s the root of the problem!

[@l.5832]

@@dennisassini-pw2ic If you knew what they have done you would know they hated me. Both of them have lied to me and attempted to steal from me. They have treated me with pure contempt. Pure hatred. If they could do so without getting caught, I believe they would have killed me.

[@amymalina5073]

It is HER loss. Swallow the loss and move forward. She is the loser here.

[@mosesthetank2318]

My wife has been giving me the silent treatment on and off for a decade. Over time, the period of silence has become longer and an episode last year lasted a record 8 months, during which time she lived in a separate bedroom. After about 4 months I started to feel a sense of relief and peace. I slept better and was less stressed. A few weeks ago she started a new episode and it took a few days before I transitioned from feeling just awful and wanting to fix things to a feeling of, THANK GOD she's no longer nagging me. What will come next is she will use sex to draw me back in. She's been pretty good at this. The silent episodes always end abruptly with her suddenly being nice and acting as if nothing happened. There is a refusal to talk about it and even a threat to go back to the silent treatment if I don't let it go. But there is now a (very) surprising feeling that I have... a sense of dread for when she slides naked into bed and blankets me in affection. Is it uncommon that the silent treatment eventually resolves itself with the partner on the receiving end just moving on?

[@ruthbarnes9999]

Why are u staying with her. She's not worth staying with. Think about it. Next time she does it show her its the last time u put up with it. You have allowed her to do this too long . So long she just doesn't care how u feel and knows u put up with it. She doesn't value u at all. Its a total lack of regards towards you her doing this. If she did she wouldn't do this. It's emotionally immature to behave this way. Ask yourself this. What is it thats making u stay and what do u value in the relationship. A psychologist asked me this very question and it gave me the answers i needed to end a friendship where i was regularly given the silent treatment to hurt, control and manipulate me. I realised anything i used to value was gone and destroyed by this abuse. Silent treatment is passive aggressive abuse. But anything that was had been slowly destroyed by this friends behaviour. So last time l got the silent treatment i didn't respond or chase after her and just let it go and as times gone on its got easier and easier to be apart from her. Show her by leaving you have had enough. Why put up with that bad behaviour towards you. You deserve better than this. No one deserves this behaviour. I assume u r bringing in an income. Show her she's on her own now. I wish u all the best

[@leesellars4345]

Narcissists will never change so take the silent treatment as a gift and opportunity to be free of all the mind games and start to rebuild the best version of yourself, without them kicking you down every step

[@courtneyawalsh]

Totally.

[@lisav8443]

Going through this now with a life long friend. She is a covert narcissist. Now that I am educated about narcissists, thank you You Tube! It is VERY empowering. Not calling her, Not engaging. Sitting back to see what happens. Praying that this might be the end, and I can escape the 44 year toxic friendship once and for all. PS - She has children that are my Godchildren, so it will be hard.

[@melanieallen1566]

My sister hadn’t spoken to me in five years after raging at me in 2018. I left the scene knowing she would go silent but had to save myself. The hardest thing I’ve ever done. She was diagnosed with lung cancer 4 mo ago and passed away last week. I forced my way into her hospital room and she reached out to me saying “I’m done”. Even in her death bed she had to exercise control over me.

[@randy_cbc8811]

That's very sad: - sorry that you had to go through that.

[@keikei1943]

Lord, that's fucked up may the Lord heal your heart, she had issues and took them out on you

[@attractarattigan3574]

My inlaws used this.. Silent treatment for 40 yrs.. On each other. It had a determental effect on thefamily esp my ex... Who did it too on me. Divorced him after 44 yrs marriage... Excelerated into many otherforms of abuse that made me ill.. On deaths door. Got better almost immediately when I left my home & farm & business (that I loved). Horror is now in the past.

[@Unlockurheart]

You just spoke scripture: Mark 10:29-31 you left bc of doing what is right & it comes w 1000 fold of what you left but w persecution as well (which is what you left in the 1st place) If you want read it in amp version & msg version & nkjv online for a better understanding bc the KJV is written in language hard to interpret!

[@65andSpry]

I just listened to this and I have listened to many narc survival videos. This is hands down the best presentation for someone dealing with narc silent treatment . Pure gold here. Key takeaway for me was “you cannot change the time line.” My strategy is for healthy self- validation. Thanks going to binge your videos now.

[@DrEmilyMayfield]

Thank you for the kind words! I am happy to hear you found the information helpful. And thank you for watching more videos!

[@sandramartin9106]

My Dad gave my Mom the silent treatment for 5 years when I was a teenager. He played the victim also. He was waiting for "his ship to come in". He about broke her. I can't forget that. 😢 He left the house, divorced her, and never spoke to her again. He had the nerve to tell me he loved her and God told him to divorce her.

[@AlanBoldt]

When life gives you a lemon...make lemonade 😊✌️...Silent treatment from a NARCISSIST, is Your Lemon...Enjoy your lemonade 💪🎁... It's a BLESSING in disguise..Take n Run...You just WON...( Silence is GOLDEN)

[@DrEmilyMayfield]

December 22, 2023

[@n700rat]

After recently realising my Mother has emotionally abused me all of my life - she keep her current silent treatment going for as long as she wants - because she’s lost me, I won’t ever speak to her again.

[@El-bz1tq]

Do not speculate if you have done something wrong. The reaction is sick anyway.

[@victoryamartin9773]

My squatter is using it to punish me for going no-contact after he abused me with rageful screaming that terrified me. Since I had told him I wanted him to leave my house, and he had screamed at me in retaliation, I believe his silent treatment is his way of blocking my attempts to persuade him to leave. It has been 7 1/2 months of silent torment, living in fear of the rabid grizzley emerging from his cave to maul me in my own house.

[@brendazaccardi9419]

I guess the narc thinks they are punishing you for being defiant towards their bullshit control. How does this affect a mother daughter relationship?

[@christinav3383]

When we got married my in-laws never spoke to me or their son. In turn my ex never spoke to me throughout our marriage of 20 years. It was ugly and lowered my self esteem. Thank God I was discarded.

[@universaltruth2025]

I used to try to break the silence and apologise even though I didn't feel responsible. Not anymore. I can't see any point. But they can maintain the silent treatment indefinitely. My husband has used this as his way of controlling and sulking for the last 30 years.

[@mheiseus]

Once you break and accept their lies as truth then they win. Do not bend the knee to that.

[@CynthiaAva]

No, I will not. The good news is when you don't bend the knee for them, they stay away and find other supply. So, it works in our favor! Yay. I will never bend to a narc-demon. Never.

[@writer1986]

The silent treatment is a game of competition. Since you didn't do what they said or wanted to do, the narcissists saw this as a "loss". So now they have to punish you by not speaking to you. (And smear your name in the process.) Their hope is that you'll do the talking first, and now they've "won." It's a stupid game. I've had to cut ties with narcissistic family members who decided to play this game with me, and their reactions were of utter shock because they never thought I'd be happy not interacting with them again.

[@nicholecornes1915]

How the hell could we be happy with them!!!!

[@Alice-ts3vl]

Trying to implement such awful method like silent treatment is the best red flag to move on asap!!!!

[@jonnuanez7183]

I grew up in the silent treatment. All they ever did was fight. Then nothing for 2-3 weeks. Me, my stepsister, and grandma would all walk on eggshells during that time. This lasted for roughly 8 years, from my 7-15 years of age. Yep, formative. I know I've picked up on some of it, too. For me, all I ever saw was conflict. I never saw "negotiations", for lack of a better term. It's something that I have to learn and I think I'm getting better at it.

[@marylourodriguez9227]

Great way to put it. Not much allowed with them!!!!!!! Mine ended it when he knew he was dying but just humiliated me one more time one month before passing!!!!!!

[@HarleyDavidsonHeaven]

I was blocked two months ago on my phone and all social media by my new girlfriend leaving me feeling confused, as I began to educate myself about what covert narcs are and do, I decided to completely block her out of my life shortly after she blocked me. I'm not going to take this kind of immature crap from her or anyone else. It was difficult to move on but I had to force myself to do it, I didn't want to go through the abuse others have gone through.

[@tictactoedias1908]

Silence is Golden now .... to many times totally desensitised now 👍

[@sisirider1963]

My ex-narc's favorite and most effective tactic was the silent treatment - for weeks at a time, but would speak to the kids or take them to their rooms and have a great time. I would try to ask if we could finally discuss the issue (whatever it was), which was met with silence. Only after I would apologize (I wouldn't even care if I was right or wrong) for the sake of getting our family back on track, would there be even a consideration of speaking like adults. Often, the apology was rejected. After 33 years, after I finally decided to set some boundaries for this abuse, I was discarded.

[@anaruperto1417]

YES!! I have a parishioner at my church that has been giving me the silent treatment for almost 2 years. Used to bother me a lot but now I know from these videos that it actually is a “WIN” for me. I now continue to move forward and never look back. I AM DONE!! And “I LOVE IT”!!! 👏👏 THANK YOU!!!!😊😊😊

[@chilo597]

To Hurt you. To see you suffer. Until you change..

[@Imnotyourdoormat]

*They can keep it up for years ... **_when necessary._*

[@MisterFanwank]

I didn't speak to my brother for a year. He didn't speak to me for a year. Then on Christmas he invited me over, but started telling me all of the conditions I'd need to follow to be welcome. When I said I wasn't interested he started raging about how simple his rules were, and how I could have a good time if I just followed them. I just didn't want to do anything but sleep on my day off. Then I went off for something like an hour screaming at him about how much I despised him when he kept pressing for my obedience. Several months later he apologized, and then he seemed to be alright. And then slowly he started adding weird conditions to things, and would get upset if I objected to anything. Then when I quit my job because I recognized my boss was pulling the same shit on me, my brother found out through the grapevine and called me at work to berate me for it. So I screamed at him for something like an hour again. When I didn't get an apology after a week of silence I went to him and screamed at him and his wife for how much I can't stand them both, for how they treat me, for how they treat my dad, and for how they treat their kids. Now I have to think about what the fuck is going to happen when dad dies and his lawyer wife looks at the will. My current plan is to find the most evil lawyer I can and tell him that as long as I don't have to be involved in any of it he's free to nickel and dime the inheritance down to nothing with legal fees. I don't care about winning, but I will not lose.

[@davidcoppotelli3957]

Dr. Emily Another Great Video to end the Week. Always spot on. Right on Point. I spent 15 Years in a LTR dating relationship with me always pulling the Wagon always the Do Boy for her. She became the Devils Daughter the last 2 years of that situation. I couldn't take anymore and told her I was done with her Bull Shit. Selfish Insecure Jealous No empathy always the poor victim. I Walked Away from her and I have never Contacted her ever complete Silence on my end and that is what she has given me. No Closure not a sound from her because I Exposed her for who she is a Toxic Narcissist. And a very Big COWARD. Thanks for the GREAT VIDEOS. And by the way you look GREAT. David.

[@DrEmilyMayfield]

Thank you for commenting and your continued support!

[@davidcoppotelli3957]

@@DrEmilyMayfield Your very Welcome thanks again for the Great Videos.

[@mirola73]

I repay the silent treatment with silence...........she hates it. Hopefully not too long anymore, making moves.

[@katydid594]

My mom can go days, weeks without talking to me, but she has other sources of supply so not sure if it’s silent treatment or simply ignoring me.

[@CynthiaAva]

They bounce around from supply to supply. They have the attention span of a flea...so they need to go from one to the other for the feeling of "fresh" supply. It's really sad and destructive. Take the time to work on you and heal.

[@sandradavis33]

As someone who has endured this treatment from my mom for 54 years, I can tell you, it will never change. You have to decide if you're going to accept and deal with it or go no contact.

[@katydid594]

@CynthiaAva you are 100% correct. I'm 59 and moved away for good about 5 months ago. She calls about once a week wanting info so she can cause trouble between me and my brothers. I don't tell her anything and keep calls short. I'm relieved to be free of the daily torment, but I know healing will take time.

[@Luton-Mick]

My mother tortured my late father with it just like my ex done with me for 10 years, unlike my poor deceased father I wouldn't put up with any more adult tantrums and eventually kicked the "toddler" to the kerb.

[@mikeyshouseofbrakes8463]

From what it sounds here regarding the silent treatment, I like it and don't want the narcissist to stop.

[@vivianmatienzo4498]

Wow....I finally realized how Narcissistic my niece is....! I always blamed myself & felt guilty for the mess of our relationship....Never too late to learn...!

[@aldelacruz5526]

New subscriber here. I think what I hate most about the narcissist (have 2 in my family) is when you and another person are having a great conversation and these narcissists can't help but butt in the conversation completely starting ridiculous debating. Sometimes I feel they need to get laid😂😂😂😂

[@DrEmilyMayfield]

Welcome! Thank you for the comments and subscribing!

[@terjepedersen4080]

The "time out" is, in a healthy relationship communicated: "I need time to think about this. I need to be alone for a while." And that is normal and good. "The silent treatment" is when a person closes up without any communication, and not only for a while, but for an extended period of time. It is a terribly evil tactic to punish the victim, to cause confusion and shame and feeling of guilt.

[@collegemommi88]

What is they wasnt like this for the first year ? Then the person started showing narcissistic traits ? Also, what if the silent treatment also includes them telling you to move out ?

[@anniea2805]

I have the opposite issue. My narc never stops talking and picks and picks and picks chipping away at me relentlessly. They’re both manipulative, but I’d almost rather have the silence…

[@tw7127]

Silent treatment is not always to gain power over others. When I go silent or block someone it’s because they’re overstepping my boundaries. If I tell someone no numerous times and they continue to do it anyway I’m gone or I simply won’t talk to you. My ex kept bringing up being polyamorous and I said no and because I went silent is a sign of narcissism ? Umm no, I’m not codependent and I’m not going to allow this video to gaslight me. Reflection is needed, because some ppl don’t get it until you stop talking to them. If someone gives you the silent treatment, because they refuse to take accountability for their destructive behavior then yes you’re most likely dealing with a narcissistic individual.

[@DrEmilyMayfield]

This video, entitled "THIS is why narcissists give silent treatment" only explains why narcissists give silent treatment. It is a very specific topic, about narcissists, in 5 minutes and 31 seconds. For a video on the situation you are describing, check out:"How do I tell the difference between NO CONTACT and SILENT TREATMENT?" kzbin.info/www/bejne/f4HVhoOPg7uekMk

[@tw7127]

@@DrEmilyMayfield Thanks for clarifying, because I always thought what I was giving was the silent treatment. In all actuality I was going no contact to protect my peace vs giving the silent treatment to gain power and control, got it.

[@DrEmilyMayfield]

@@tw7127Exactly! And that was a completely appropriate response for you to give as a way to protect your peace.

[@mercedesvallar3384]

Im the only one in my immediate family that is getting the silent treatment from a step parent. But when the step parent needs help, they want to talk to me. I just act like i dont hear her. People in my family know what is going on but keep quiet

[@rachelsaez3718]

Keep in mind the world is not silence just them. I go out and flirt my ass off and talk to any and everybody by the time I get back home I’m tired anyway.

[@courtneyawalsh]

Good strategy! 😂

[@courtneyawalsh]

And after you’ve been treated like absolute garbage for years? A kind, present, available & invested person who is consistent, whose words & actions match, who is generous with compliments, time, energy, affection, money & loving support? SO yummy. Call it in. And let it in when it arrives. Speaking to myself, here, too!

[@Dman3827]

I get the silent treatment very randomly. It's horrible. Every female covert narcissist is textbook. They'll ignore your emails and texts. Not care about you unless it suits them. It's always about them. It's their loss because then they act like helpless victims. You can't enjoy your life.

[@sarahostrinsky4595]

No the more this occurs the LESS likely you are to respond to it.

[@apontutul]

Thanks. Now I can relate everything

[@ChuckLong-d8n]

Unfortunately when it is a very close family member it is very very sad. The mental illness of this personality disorder is damaging and toxic for YOU and for the person suffering with it. As the good lady stayex they live in a constant state of chaos and anxiety...so sad, but for your own personal peace and wellbeing sometimes time, space, distance and periods of quiet are necessary. God will determine the length of time so pray and let Him handle it!!

[@joanarundale8463]

I get it!! Now I am detached and barely speak to him. Long term marriage. Would be trading one bad situation for another to walk away. I don’t want to be invested in control on my end. But I can barely speak to him. How do I stay in silent treatment on my end without feeling like I’m playing a game of control. Love your videos!!!

[@jamesniles4082]

I will with a narcissist for 3 years and 6 months all I ever got was push and pull silent treatment two three days, finally I confronted her for infidelity giving her a narcissistic injury she went silent so did I. There I took the opportunity to walk away and never look back it's been now for a month I blocked her everywhere shut down my social media

[@khagindratri6781]

Thank You. I needed to hear this.

[@JannatMirza-u1c]

Every body on the Internet is telling that cover narsasist are dangerous and evil stay away & go no contact .. but unfortunately no body is telling you how to contact with them and how to connect with them .. I asked that from Ai and I was shocked. 1. Ai tell that deal them with care ... no argu .. no criticism .. no display of harsh emotions. 2. Do appreciate them so they feel less harm from you and open up towards you. This is how you can maintain a healthy relationship with a covert narcissist.

[@samhassan9448]

What if it’s your baby daddy doing this ? We co parent but he doesn’t reply to anything I say

[@samhassan9448]

@OllieJones38624 you won’t believe this but he won sole physical and judge is letting my baby move with him.

[@wickedbunny2020]

My daughter is doing this to me. 2 months of nothing, im worried for my new grandson but i refuse to do what she wants. She wants me to break up with my boyfriend and shes mad i wont.

[@johnmoran7996]

Because of my narcissist girlfriends actions I've been told she may wind up dead.thats her problem.

[@latikabenz6289]

I think he is using silent treatment because he started the final discard phase. He left home, even doesn't call to ask for our child. And seems very annoyed whenever I call him, many times blocks me or switches phone off. Not reachable. He just said that if I didn't like it, I must leave.

[@casperinsight3524]

If the narc remains silent 🤫 ENJOY the reprieve 😅 consider yourself fortunate 😉

[@lorrainethomas1984]

I just went through this, and I Blocked her and plus her entire family. My actions showed her childish a** she doesn't matter and can go to h*ll.