Never Ignore These Modern Dating Red Flags w/ Dating Expert Yue Xu| Fun With Dumb Ep 274

[@FongYukYu]

Omg, praise the shepherd, not only is the CC available, it's not automated! The accuracy is noticeable. It's much higher quality. Tysm 🎉❤

[@dumbfoundead]

We got u

[@LulRan]

Definitely one of my favorite episodes! Steffie in particular was great because she gave this totally different perspective on her dating app approach that got Dumb and Yue Xu to dig deeper into a discussion. Really hope to see Yue Xu back! She's so insightful and funny. Gotta also give props to Dumb because I do see that growth and maturity, even in this episode. Could tell you were listening with intent and focused on giving Steffie and Yue Xu space to talk. Keep at it Dumb! Proud of you man.

[@BarabbasTheRedeemed]

Women have an abundance of choices whereas most guys have a scarcity. A woman's difficulty in dating comes from perfectionism, too much choice. A guy's difficulty comes from lack of choices. Online dating changed everything. If youre a regular guy, chances are nobody wants to date you. You just have to learn to be alone

[@FongYukYu]

18:20 hm... The theory if you're happy being alone = you're ready for a relationship is interesting. As an introvert, I don't think it fits my truth.

[@yzajeldalindin8139]

You sure you just arent shy? Isnt being introverted mean you like being in smaller groups other than large crowds? Introverts doesnt mean you like being alone all the time. I could be wrong tho..

[@goom-]

@@yzajeldalindin8139 introvert is like after spending time with people you feel depleted and have to spend time alone to recoup. Like if you hangout with friends and had fun but then after you're like... I just wanna chill and be alone for a while.

[@be.loui.]

This was great! Such good open energy between you guys. Thanks to Yue for some helpful new approaches and point of views!

[@KRHEE]

This guest was way too mature for Steffie 😂😂😂

[@Makyeezy]

Great episode! Insightful, introspective and mature approach with unpicking this hot topic. Be authentic and look inward! 🙏

[@peacefulneptune]

this was such a good ep!! so many eye-opening moments

[@VintageSecure]

😂 Steffi has a very strange logic. I wish you guys invited your therapists to the show. 😂

[@Calida]

This was a lot of interesting conversations with a lot of different points of view all together. I appreciated that 😊 I'm with Steffi that I like to be upfront with my important values from early on.

[@DoCc7872]

​The "chicken game" is played around communication. You don't want to come of desperate by answering each text, you want to come off as "busy", potentially uninterested, as in that your "value" is higher than the other person, putting the other person in the acting position, aka "do stuff for me, put in the effort, entertain me, show me you are worth just as much as I am(if not more), win me over, deserve me". And let's be honest, there's only a handful of people in this day and age not having the time in a day to answer a text. But the trick is in what Miss Yue Xu was saying, you need to be happy with yourself first and foremost, or to put it bluntly, the chicken game doesn't start when you begin talking to somebody, your chicken game's gotta be so hard that you're playing it without even yet knowing the person. Know your worth, raise it, invest time, money and love into yourself, stay busy, you need to be satisfied and happy with yourself and be ok with being by yourself, you don't NEED to be with someone else (that doesn't mean you have to be lonely). Only then will people see your real worth when you don't have to play "games" to attract somebody. Also, be honest with yourself about what you are looking for, whether it's something casual, a fling or a lifetime, don't set yourself and the other person up for disappointment. I realized it years ago, and am re-learning that again, and it's still true, it holds the water. Stand on your shit, put your money where your mouth is, be worthy, get it kings and queens 👑❤️‍🔥💯

[@jach8602]

Listening to Steffie makes me physically cringe

[@user-zr4dg3xq2u]

1:23:28 Alyssa Mancao on the ABG podcast talks about the importance of compatibility vs chemistry. We overlook good people and miss a lot of possible relationships because we’re too focused on physical looks and sexual attraction. When it comes to dating, people are probably better off being with someone who’s decent/average looking with a compatible personality over someone who’s very attractive but has a more incompatible personality. If I was dating in this era (I’m married), I’d probably go for someone who’s more dorky looking but has a goofy and nerdy personality. Whereas when I was younger, I cared more about looks and a more uptight personality.

[@LV_fromhtx]

Great episode. Sometimes guests like yue xu are more interesting & aspiring than celebs

[@VintageSecure]

Not all Hero's wear capes.

[@olapiechowicz8775]

…an interesting conversation about us…people…I will just add my opinion…a relationship is built with all the ingredients… 🙂attractiveness, passion, sense of humor, knowledge that gives a wise understanding…monogamous, because I think everyone strives for it, never ask for love... there is or there is not... never postpone it for later because we may not have time or miss it... if there is good communication, you can wait with next level... and simply appreciate every moment...🙂

[@Jean-vo2ob]

Loved this episode! I hope there’s a follow-up as teased.

[@DssK91]

Beat thing I heard was do what you love to do and you will make friends there. Very great point!

[@elgenyg]

this episode was a really good listen and great insights

[@ArtworksByEden]

Yaaay captions!!!! 😊😎💯omgerd thank you so much. I use captions because I have severe ADHD and the captions help me focus and better absorb content! The captions actually help me catch some jokes that I would have otherwise missed! So in a way, captions make your videos way funnier/better! Thank you, from this corner of the neuro-diverse community! -Eden ADHDerailed 🤓

[@jianelson7604]

Love this outfit on Steffie!

[@Valenchanted]

She is amazing. I am in a relationship, but her advice is just great. ❤

[@Jsleets91L-qo4qs]

What’s the deal with steffie tryna make herself sound like some absolutely perfect woman to date…. if you listen to any of the other episodes it’s clearly obvious she’s not only a hypocrite, but has zero self awareness get over yourself

[@dronevv.8477]

Same 😂

[@realdreamerschangetheworld7470]

I thought self-marketing was a good trait 😂 and so is confidence.

[@ck1830]

Her cringy moments are gold. 😂😂😂

[@philipcallado5693]

I did notice in a previous episode that she was quick to bring up all these “Icks”. I was like “who do you think you are?” 😂

[@fliproxxx]

New Subscriber from Toronto! Enjoy your show btw Dumb after watching this Episode and Steffie was aking you to set her up and wondering if shes still available coz i know someone interested to submit an APPLICATION lol.

[@esthersim9216]

I’m also an INFJ!! 🙌

[@joenc.9361]

Omg love her! She has logical point of view

[@heytaso]

this episode’s golden✨

[@liyinchong4493]

Thank You Dumb and Steffie for such an informative podcast ❤

[@Shakashack2022]

How does one identify a true narcissist in dating phase so that the other can RUN away fast! Unfortunately, couples marry & have children & then divorcing a narcissist is a HORRIFYING NIGHTMARE for everyone involved.

[@JayJay-du4tp]

Fire episode… everyone can relate

[@sLeepy1004]

❤😂❤really interesting episode !! 🔥🔥🔥🔥

[@TMNT3388]

@56:30, this is when smart people get to "intellectual" and get Stupid, LOL

[@BarabbasTheRedeemed]

Steffie: I can't find a guy amongst my 100s of options that meets my impossibly-high standards. Most guys: * swipes right 100s of times. Prays for one match in a month.*

[@simon42o]

know to socialize is important per say but that doesn't mean they're good at communication is I think Yues point at 5:16.

[@blinksstayfresh2524]

I wanna date Steph! She’s the girl of my dreams. Make it happen Dumb!!!

[@MrShadyPinoy]

sick ass episode

[@talon6890]

Why the watch though?

[@TheTinyOrc]

Just because it make sense don’t mean it make sense

[@noroyalbloodline3983]

What is she talking about..of course being social is important in a relationship 💀. Communication is one of the foundations for a healthy relationship.

[@TheTinyOrc]

Yo Dumbfounded this Steffie girl kind of match you.😂😂😂 Edit: proves dumbs point “you keep going to these dates” Edit: Y’all actually can make a good romcom.

[@Nebuchadnezzar1501]

They met on POF.

[@WARnTEA]

I think part of the reason why butterflies are considered love at first sight is because their brain has subconsciously recognized a person as special, so they get nervous and hyper-analyze everything that person does in an effort to not fuck it up. This is also why most girls say that their type is someone that can make them laugh. Usually the “jokes” they laugh at aren’t even jokes let alone funny, but their body laughs subconsciously as a way to signal to the other person that they are having a good time. This is why some awkwardness and silence can be useful, because it gives the other person time to feel nervous. If you are just talking constantly they will end up feeling more like a friend.

[@Turtleburtle44]

All these “dating coaches” feel more like pastors or knowitalls

[@77rone1]

Okay maybe i missed it i need a clarification so Yue is a dating expert? Not a relationship expert? Is she in a relationship? Again maybe i missed it

[@77rone1]

Yue advises people on how to become good at dating? But not on how to get into and maintain a relationship? I'm confused??

[@jb909jb]

@47:00 when guys say that, it's not that they are saying they want to date 100 people... what they are saying is that women have options and the ability to find/date sometime... many men don't have that privilege. wish she could see how much she likes 'less is more' if she was a guy getting no matches.

[@monbebearmybird1239]

Okay but in my experience when it comes to dating seriously most guys are just adding whoever without thought (Plenty men who match me say they want casual when my profile clearly states I want a relationship) so then those “options” are not worth it’s weight anyways and to weed out is just disappointing and exhausting.

[@docomo279]

it goes both ways. just because you have 100 matches doesn't mean he or she is going to jump into all of it. When you're seriously ready to date, you will weave through that 100 and at times, you won't even bother with that 100. If you're here to play, you also weave but know who to easily target and take advantage and play. My friend had over 100 matches easily and he would never settle because there are plenty of women out there...his dream was to find a vietnamese girl and try her once but he kept on getting Chinese and Indian girls. He is a living example of just playing women and dragging women that are seriously wanting a relationship but get led on by him because he will never reject her. He's a great friend but he is delulu finding something that he doesn't know what he wants but just won't admit he will not settle down. It's common with high value men and they lead women on with "i have xyz". Ladies, run but if you're delulu, then stay and know you can't blame anyone but yourself. He will just show it off and tell you but you will never get that ring LOL. Not saying all HVM are like that but majority are so give the regular guys a chance. LOL

[@ck1830]

Cringe Queen Steph is back!!! Never disappoints! 😮😮😮

[@ck1830]

here's a major "Dating Red Flag," a girl won't tell u her age. 🤣🤣🤣

[@Masssshysteria]

Not so sure about that thumbnail. Change it for the sake of her, it’ll help please.

[@broccoliaugratin]

so you get married, have kids and every 7 years the kids can get new parents? this dating expert is so dumb

[@dwang78]

I'm an infj-t, no thanks

[@mariano7621]

*Promosm* 🤭

[@curbantula]

this is the girl who recorded herself proessing a breakup on tik tok