ECT Final (30 Month) Update and On To TMS

Get in contact with me:
/ jennysectdiary or email me at [e-mail]
I have been battling severe depression and anxiety for nine years. I have tried many different medication combos and all have failed to improve my symptoms. I am undergoing a treatment called electroconvulsive therapy which is a treatment for depression that has a much higher success rate than any antidepressant. For the length of my treatment, I will be keeping a video journal of my progress. Due to the lack of testimonies about ECT on KZbin, I have decided to share my journal with the community. Thank you for taking the time to check out my channel. I hope you find my videos informative and helpful.

[@megansanchez9905]

I have a friend that recently told me he had ECT treatments and was very reluctant to tell me at first but he finally did. I had no idea what it was prior to him telling me so I was very iffy about the situation. I have used your videos as a way to educate myself and see how much it really does change someone's life. I'm so proud of you and grateful that you are posting these videos. You really are making a difference in the world.

[@ruffeyx]

thanks for these videos

[@LeidianeLima-yq7iz]

Does the memory come back or not?

[@erinmarie99]

Thank you for sharing your journey. I have tried everything - nothing has worked and my life has just fallen into pieces. The old me had the energy to pick the pieces back up but now I'm just so exhausted. Just like us said - I have no energy to do anything. I go for my consecration tomorrow. This was a very helpful testimonial and I am very hopeful that this will work! Hope you are still doing well!

[@jennysectdiary]

Hi Erin, I am so sorry to hear that things are not well. I will definitely keep you in my thoughts and I hope that it will work as well.

[@mubashirlatif9350]

Very sorry to hear about your ordeal. Hope you're feeling better now

[@robertlockwood866]

Hello - just scanning around and found this. I APPARENTLY WAS BORN WITH A DEPRESSIVE GENE AND HAD DEPRESSION ALL my life although not always aware of it. In 1982 it hit me and started treatment. I have had multiple of meds., therapy, 30 TMS treatments, Fisher Wallace, and five Ketamine treatments. I have no help whatsoever from any of these especially the TMS and the Ketamine. The only treatment left is ECT and I will not do that one. Sooooo - not all things help with everyone.

[@jessicah3450]

Thank you for making these videos! I have struggled with depression/adhd/anxiety for most of my life. I have been on around 50 different medications. I saw an ECT specialist, but he said I was not a candidate because my subtype of depression (atypical depression) tends to not respond to ECT very well (only 50% around 90% for other types), so I went on an MAOI instead. MAOI's worked some, but the side effects and diet restrictions were a lot to handle. My new dr is pushing TMS, but it is so hard to find information about it, especially since ECT would not work for me. TMS was being pushed as an alternative to ECT, and no one could tell me if my subtype actually responds to it, since ECT likely would not work on me. Anyway, I am feeling better since my ADHD and anxiety are better. I think the stimulants help my depression too, but those thoughts still get to me very often. It's nice to find someone who it's helped since it's so difficult to find info on it! ❤️👐 Good luck!

[@MahaparaKohli]

Jessica tms didn't wrk fr me at all..now gng through ECT sessions..it was my first day..and suicidal thoughts are still pouring in

[@Mamaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

i love your hair. I've been following you since the beginning. I had six rounds of ECT in 2014 after having my second child. I am pregnant again and if I have another postpartum episode after this baby, ECT will be my first choice. I am so glad you are doing well!!! you are an inspiration.

[@jennysectdiary]

Thank you so much! Your kind words mean so much to me

[@33ladycatherine]

I did ECT for 2-3 years, I can't remember how long. My last treatment was in 2014. I have wanted to do the TMS so badly. I ended up with 2 brain aneurysms. I now have pieces of platinum coil in my brain. I can still do ECT if I need to, but no TMS. I have 2 questions for you because I know no one here that has had ECT. Have you had any issues with long term and short term memory? My memory is so damaged. My other question was did you end up with any other problems with your brain after ECT? Good luck with the TMS and remember even when it is unpleasant you are very lucky you have the option to do this kind of treatment. I wish all the time that it was something I could try. Stay strong, we are warriors that rode the lightening.

[@mubashirlatif9350]

Really sorry to hear about your ordeal. I hope you heal and find solace and comfort in trying times.

[@PthaloGreen2]

Love your new look! Maybe you can start a new KZbin channel with makeup reviews, etc.! So glad you are doing well mood-wise, etc. as well. You are so positive now. Thanks for doing these videos. Testimonials regarding the efficacy of ECT (and TMS) are sorely needed, and you have doubtless helped many by posting these videos detailing your experiences. All the best to you.

[@jennysectdiary]

Thank you so much! That means so much to me!

[@tracywatson7776]

Thank you for sharing your story. I am about to have my first doctor consultation for ECT. Now that you are doing TMS......which would you say is better? ECT or TMS? Which worked better? Doing both?

[@finallyFreeee]

I told you in an email to try tms! :) I am so glad it worked for you!

[@timothyfranke2414]

Wondering if you are still medicated?

[@joyfairclough4686]

So happy for you Jenny! I wonder how your medical treatments of TMS compare with the results of these TCMS headsets that are sold commercially to gamers. I've read some stuff about people using those for learning and for depression, too.

[@jennysectdiary]

Thank you Joy! I've heard of those too and I haven't really seen any studies or anything about how they work. It would be interesting to look into though.

[@rachitjoshi23]

Is it really safe to take ??

[@Melissabella]

I've followed you since the beginning, had ECT along with you, and am so happy to see you feeling hope and joy. You look lovely and content and I couldn't be happier for you! Please do keep us posted. You mean so much to us.

[@jennysectdiary]

+Melissa Latimer you are so sweet! Thank you so so much!

[@rosietosie2286]

I have major depressive disorder (mdd) and I'm super depressed,at times I try to make the best of my life better but I want to be so happy in life I want to be positive you know I was thinking of ect but then I realized how it could damage me in ways I never would think , I'm scared of relapses , if something in my life goes wrong I'm like obsessing about it for weeks at a time and that's no good , I read positive reviews and researched it.... I want to be happy with my life forget about the anguish and stress I went through. ... I hope your doing good

[@jennysectdiary]

Hi Rosseane, I'm so sorry to hear that things are not well. Have you had a chance to talk to your doctor about what type of treatment you should pursue?

[@joecool2462]

Rosie Tosie Hey Rosie i think you are so sexy i also have those same thoughts you have and want to know you BETTER lol hmu

[@andrewd.harris656]

I think this was wise of you Jenny. There are conditions that meds don't help very much. The truth is it's worth the risk with certain types of therapy. And there are risks like tardive dyskenesia with meds, so you can have rapid therapy and forget a lot of damaging memories perhaps or forget them slowly and die of liver or kidney disease from drugs. The full old type of ECT is especially recommended when you have knots in your muscles and things like I do. I'd ECT the full dangerous kind twice, and I'd like to go back for a few more rounds of it. And my cognitive function has increased since then, not decreased. I was severely contorted with speech problems.

[@skariel1996]

Jenny, I'm on #9 and don't notice any significant difference. I am having a HUGE problem with anxiety just before and during the introduction of the anesthesia, so bad that I begin shaking....my heart is pounding and I am near hyperventilation. Have you experienced this or have you heard of similar experiences........I am absolutely terrified and I don't know why.............David

[@mubashirlatif9350]

Your hair looks fab, Jenny. Hope you're feeling well now

[@NatureFreak1127]

60% of people? Can you post your source, please? I have read, that only 30-35% have a remission. Glad you are doing fine!

[@joeeaston9292]

If the ect was so helpful, why would you need tms now? Are you still depressed? I am elated your feeling better but I guess I dont get it. Ive read up on tms and it sounds much better than ect by far so Im glad you found your way back , now so go out there and Live !

[@CaidicusProductions]

I constantly think of things I could do, and I want to do stuff, but as soon as I think of doing anything, I just think "What's the point?" and don't want to do it anymore.I used to enjoy playing games, going to places I've never seen before, spending time with people, now I just don't enjoy doing anything anymore because I can't understand why I'm supposed to like it. Do you think TMS would help with that? I am taking medications for depression. I don't feel depressed in the traditional sense, but moreso in the sense that I get angry easily when not getting treatment, and I suffer a lot of anxiety. Yeah... do you think this would help?

[@jennysectdiary]

Hi Caid, I have struggled with lack of motivation as well. The TMS has definitely helped me in that area so talk to your doctor about it for sure!

[@CaidicusProductions]

+Jenny's ECT Diary thanks for the reply, Jenny. And how is everything going for you, these days?

[@paniclife621]

I've had extreme problems with depression and anxiety since 1972 .I'm finished and need the end to set me free .

[@Redbel]

did TMS works ?

[@rosietosie2286]

I want to be positive as much I'm trying to look into tms and I want this to help me in the long run .... I'm happy sorry if I got personal hope the best for you ....

[@jennysectdiary]

Thank you so much for your kind words. Have you been able to research TMS and/or talk to your doctor about it?

[@JaredWilmer]

Hey Jenny! I've been following you for a couple months (since I started my ECT treatments). I am curious as to why you would switch from a treatment that was, at most, a couple days a week to TMS that was every day for six weeks? Wouldn't that cause more interference with your daily life?

[@jennysectdiary]

Hey Jared! That is such a good question and I should have addressed that in the video. TMS was a 33 minute treatment and I had it very early in the morning so that it wouldn't interfere with work and other things during the day. The thing with ECT is I would have to go under and that would cause me to be out of it the entire rest of the day so I couldn't do anything. I'm so glad you asked me that and I think I'll mention it in my next video.

[@JaredWilmer]

+Jenny's ECT Diary Thanks for getting back to me so quickly! I am SO glad that you are finding that TMS works for you. My research has showed me that TMS is not really an option for me at this point in time. It is important to note though that (based on my interpretation) it sounds like we suffer from different disorders. I'm guessing that you suffer from Unipolar Depression, while I suffer from Bipolar Depression. The experts seem to agree, taking into account what we know right now, TMS is not a viable option for those with Bipolar Disorder. So it looks like I am stuck with ECT for the time being. Fortunately, it has worked amazingly well for me. I'm just wondering now how long this mood stability will last...

[@viviannelok3629]

+Jared Wilmer Hi Jared, I have been diagnosed manic depressive too and am beginning to consider ECT since medication alone isn't working for me, can I ask you if you have felt any pains from the treatment after the anesthetics worn out?

[@JaredWilmer]

Vivianne Lok Hey Vivianne. I will try to give you my most honest answer. Obviously experiences will vary but here is my experience: I received a total of 13 treatments. 8 Acute treatments and 5 C-ECT treatments. (I can fill you in on the difference if you don't know) Most times when I woke up after the treatment I was groggy and disoriented, but that eventually wore off. I didn't experience any pain immediately after the treatment. However I did experience an extreme amount of tension in my upper back, neck, jaw and face. I also had headaches. I experienced memory loss during the first 8 treatments (those memories don't usually come back) but not during the next 5 that were much more spaced out. Another strange side effect I experienced was olfactory hallucinations (mystery smells) that "smelled" awful. I also had a very frequent sense of "deja vu". It was an odd feeling. I think the worst part of the whole experience was the anxiety and panic attacks that I would get before a treatment. The anxiety would usually start 24-48 hours beforehand and then intensify up the moment that they put me under. The most important take away is that ECT saved my life. That being said, you should understand that, as with any serious medical procedure, it is not a pleasant experience. Although it may most likely stop an acute manic or depressive episode (and it will feel great to feel normal again) there are usually considerable side effects that will take some time to "get over". These side effects almost always go away with time however. For me it took over a month to really see the side effects go away. I hope that helps. If you ever have any questions about ECT or my experiences do not hesitate to ask me. (I've done a large amount of research on the topic)

[@viviannelok3629]

+Jared Wilmer Thank you so much for your detailed answer! I think that's very friendly of you. I just googled C-ECT but couldn't find any detailed or clear explanation on what it is, other than it being a continuing therapy method. Could you tell me what it is and if you felt any difference from it? (I'm curious about whether it really prevents a new episode). And just to make sure, is the muscle stiffness that you felt included in the post side effect that you experienced? Or did your muscles only bother you for a short period of time after having a session. I unfortunately myself suffer from hallucinations including the olfactory ones from time to time due to my condition alone so I don't think that would bother me much... but the muscle stiffness seems like something I would not be able to cope with for such a long time because it seems like a symptom I would most likely be very sensitive to with me already suffering from tension headaches caused by my neck and head position straining the muscles on their own. :-(

[@travelpill9669]

Hey Jenny, could you please tell me, if you were on hormonal contraception during your ECT or TMS treatment? There is a link between contraception and fluctuating of depression. Thank you for sharing.

[@jackhayes2583]

Does tms improve cognition.

[@dabhob333]

Hello--will you be documenting your TMS experience? Your ECT videos were so helpful.

[@liammiller2407]

It's been 6 months since you uploaded this vid, how are you now? I will be doing TMS sometime this year hopefully, I just have to save some money because the National Health Service here in England won't pay for something that is apparently twice as likely to be effective as anti-depressants!

[@Ashsplashplays]

I'm probably going to get ECT and if it doesnt work I will look into it. I'm at my wits end. Does any of it help with anxiety too?

[@timothyfranke2414]

Any updates on the tms?

[@rosietosie2286]

I'm talking about tms . ....

[@TheJoker10259]

So happy for you, Jenny!

[@jennysectdiary]

Thank you so much!

[@birddogfreemann]

You are very brave.

[@MakingVidsBreh]

I wish the best for you. Thank you for sharing.

[@aswathyk7813]

I have doubt

[@squib308]

Good luck, friend. Thank you for sharing your experiences. That's very interesting, and is helpful.

[@Redbel]

im happy for you ,i wish i feel the same ...

[@Allanwify]

TMS sounds great

[@jthyn4436]

you are a brave woman and an inspiration

[@Juliemadblogger]

Your brain is healing from the harm of electroshock. Good to see.

[@servinruben69]

Do you still using meds?

[@jennysectdiary]

Hi Ruben, yes I take three different medications. Abilify, Welbutron, and Lamictal

[@dcindc1452]

Were you ever worried these doctors were just trying to take your money?

[@carolsaylor6151]

PRAISE GOD!!!#

[@aswathyk7813]

Pleasr rply

[@feloniousmonk321]

The majority of people cannot afford this.

[@mickismommy95]

Insurance (if you are blessed to have it) is starting to cover tms.medicaid in some states, even.

[@mirrorworldx]

thank god you stopped the ect

[@paniclife621]

I'll pay anybody one dollar to kill me and dump my body in a landfill.

[@bellag2864]

@@paniclife621 are you ok? I said a prayer for you

[@truthneeded3023]

So, you made these videos over 30 months of having ECT, with what outcome? 0ver 70 "treatments", no "recovery". And, as you did this, many vulnerable people posted "gee, thanks, I'm going to try that!" (Get craniocerebral trauma and risk mild to severe brain damage..). Do the world a favor and delete your videos or at least attach a warning that people have ended up with permanent amnesia, personality changes, cognitive problems, and trauma as a result of having this lunatic procedure done... So, you were "lucky" and survived relatively unscathed. Most people don't.

[@truthneeded3023]

Actually, if a person has had TWO "adequate" trials of 6 weeks of antidepressants that "failed" to "work", he/she can be labelled "treatment resistant" and deemed a candidate for ECT. A poor pregnant woman will be given ECT bc "drugs" might harm her baby! An elderly person with drug intolerance could be given ECT. None of these people should be "treated" with "brain injury". No one needs to be left "handicapped" and missing chunks of their life, with their identity and intelligence mangled. ECT needs to be banned. It has been documented to be no better than "sham ECT"- look, no brain damage- and studies prove its use "cannot be scientifically justified". If it is not banned, the "consent" form should list brain damage and the other REAL risks in giant capital letters so people know they can become vegetables who are more likely to kill themselves....

[@jessicah3450]

+Truth Needed You should look up Dr. Peter Breggin. He has a channel here on KZbin. I found him very validating to my struggle with dealing with very treatment resistant depression. Sometimes I think the drugs given to me did more harm than good. I was not a candidate for ECT due to my subtype of depression (atypical depression). But a doctor that I found much less compassionate said they should have given me ECT anyway, showing that there is a belief that treatment resistant patients should be punished for not improving, even in modern times. I worry that other patients struggling meet those kind of doctors. At this point our depression is so painful we have considered/attempted suicide many times, so some brain damage doesn't sound as bad as living in that misery and hopelessness. ECT is one of the treatments of last resort. But yes, lesions, cell death, need to be considered, and a good compassionate doctor will weigh the benefits and risks with the patient.

[@jessicah3450]

+Jessica Hill TMS has not shown to damage the brain like ECT, but I am still skeptical of it because it is shooting powerful (MRI strength) magnetic energy through your brain. Long term studies are also hard to find. Most of the TMS "experts" are also the ones selling the TMS machine, so that makes me very wary. A 6 week treatment of TMS can cost well over $10,000, so we know they're raking in the money.

[@jaysonphillips7262]

Truth Needed: Where are you getting your information from? ECTs can, indeed, help people who have depression, including people like my wife who have been through nearly 10 medications for depression over the course of decades, and this despite the fact she has steadily attended psychotherapy since she was a teenager. The consent forms, indeed, lists the risks of ECTs, including death. And these consent forms need to be signed by patients in the presence of an ECT doctor every 30 days. You would do well to do the appropriate research on a topic before you go spouting off your falsehoods regarding said topic.

[@allysonanderson1807]

Truth Needed glad you said this! I was almost given this ECT shit and I’m so glad I avoided it! I watch Peter Breggin and I am incredibly grateful for him.