eels - i need some sleep | 𝙨𝙡𝙤𝙬𝙚𝙙 + 𝙧𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙗

original song:
• Shrek 2 Soundtrack 7...
gif: maison ikkoku

[@DARKMANYT07]

esta cancion me ayudo mucho❤

[@gaboreyes4888]

💚shrek 2💚

[@jumentogenial-oi2oo]

I feel sad. Everything has lost its charm for me. I have been emotionally invalidated since I was born and nothing that others say makes me feel better, in fact it only makes it worse. I feel alone even when I am surrounded by people and I just want to show others that I am not okay because I have never had the emotional attention necessary for a child since I was a child. I have suffered trauma since I was 11 but I have had bad experiences before. My parents separated when I was 3 and I witnessed domestic violence since I was little and this made me develop an "aggressive" behavior at school which made them call the child protection council which gave me my first trauma. I was bullied and was blamed for having ADHD. I was considered guilty for everything and all my mental disorders. I grew up being hated by teachers, coordinators, by the principal who once spat on me. I was attacked by teachers and a guy who I don't know if he was an educator or something like that was a pedo and did things to me that I can't even mention. My family never saw my pain, they said it was the hormones or that it would pass. I tried to say that I I felt tired of life and was told that this doesn't exist at my age. I developed a hatred for authority figures, which others mistook as a lack of character. At the time, I felt that if I disappeared, no one would miss me. I dealt with my mother who was emotionally unbalanced, my father was absent, and my mother didn't take care of me. I can't believe in God anymore. Everything loses its color for me. I can't do well in school and they consider me guilty. My pain has always been invisible to others. I was punished when I just needed a hug, and now it's too late for hugs. I turned 18 and realized that I wasn't happy in my childhood or adolescence. Since I can't handle even the smallest responsibility, like a future test, how will I handle it when I go to college or have to work and pay bills? How do I accept that nothing I can do will change the past? How do I accept that my childhood wasn't as good as a child deserves and that I can't do anything about it? And there were other traumas and I feel like it's too late for me now, I feel like what's broken can't be fixed, and everything people say just makes me feel sadder and angrier. I don't know what's happening to me because in 2023 I was happy but now in 2024 even though absolutely nothing bad has happened I've started to feel horrible and I don't know why and I've been so emotionally invalidated that I feel ashamed of my feelings, I feel like my emotions aren't important or valid. I wasn't happy as a child so why would I be happy when I reach adulthood? Ps:sorry for my english.