Elon Musk: Living God

Greetings proletariat! This is the very real, very true story of Elon Musk: Living God.
Patreon: / georgrockallschmidt
Twitter: / grockallschmidt
Facebook: / 100025678273449

[@exquisitecorpse4917]

Elon is so incredible....we really should send him to explore space.

[@54tisfaction]

Brilliant!

[@lifeisstr4nge]

Alone

[@parsoniareigns]

Surely, in chariot befitting him. A car perhaps, electric even?

[@Ira__L]

along with putin please! and the Iranian dictator. and Trump too (as a preventative measure)

[@ocdmusic]

@Atropus Arbaalish or food.

[@chainedlupine]

Surprised Georg didn't mention the man's lush, glorious hair that he's always had since he was just a wee genius.

[@repletereplete8002]

As his unrivalled IQ rocketed so did his follicles shoot up to match his glorious ascent into the heavens!

[@chrissre7935]

The booketh of elon god 'mongst men states: booketh of paypal, chapt'r 2 v'rs 5:. And than programm'rs and engine'rs did look at the code and t wast lacking valor. Elon stoodeth above those folk and those gents fearfully did state. This is a mess nay sir can fixeth the code. Elon did start coding but the temp'rature of his headeth wast soo high. That gent did shed his hair to maketh the temp'rature dropeth. Aft'r the coding wast done. That gent stoodeth and hath said yond code is the bombeth. than that gent regrew his hair in following months. His hath lost hair than did cure canc'r f'r people all ov'r the w'rld. Yond is the w'rd of elon

[@jaydy71]

He said "let there be hair" and simply willed it into existence. As you remember, hair didn't exist before him.

[@nineteenfortyeight6762]

And that big manly jaw that doesn't move

[@notyourdamnbusiness8795]

i still remember when Elon singlehandedly drank all the water out of the cave in Thailand so those boys and their trainer could walk out and not even get their feet wet. what a hero.

[@rtqii]

You are forgetting that he walked across the water first... And then he realized the others could not walk across the water, so he drank the water, allowing them to escape. Very much like Superman.

[@christopherrohlf1975]

And when that guy jealously called him a pedo afterwards, he didn't even respond... What humility!

[@notyourdamnbusiness8795]

@@christopherrohlf1975 its like the dude wasnt even thankful for the creation of the PR submarine industry. some people i tell ya.

[@jamieparry6420]

If only the BBC did impartiality like this, masterful stuff.

[@DeepVeinThrombonus]

You forgot the part where he would sleep on factory floors in order to contribute his body heat. This ensured that the workers had a comfortable work environment while also save the planet

[@elvingearmasterirma7241]

As a South African this is absolutely hilarious

[@SchlangeVonEden]

As a German, this is too. ;)

[@paulhadden]

As an Australian, this is why South Africa is just too scary. If there’s any other Commonwealth nation that can keep ‘Straya in check and deliver a serving of humble pie after it’s dominated the Comm Games medal tally like China does in the Olympics. Then send in that teched up mercenary from Elysium

[@AntiCookieMonster]

As non-native English speaker, this sentence structure makes no sense.

[@elvingearmasterirma7241]

@@AntiCookieMonster The subject is implied with the use of "As a" South African is the descriptive noun And then, this is the second subject. The video. Absolutely hilarious is the description and what I, the first subject, think of the second subject Edit: I am breaking it down because it is informal English and you will lose marks if you use it in a classroom

[@AntiCookieMonster]

@@elvingearmasterirma7241 (Now I feel bad for making you brake snow clone chain under your original comment.) It feels like a template for a sentence got highjacked to form similar sentence, but one where middle part fell out. As line of reasoning, it's not as nice to follow along. As not that smart of a person, [I think] this can be easily understood from context. As human, this machine of flesh and bone is fallible.

[@adoredpariah]

He also invented internet communications by the transitive property of accidentally buying twitter.

[@sprobablycancr4457]

Some people wouldn't know genius if it burned their house down with a faulty circuit.

[@brianyule1289]

It's this kind of exhaustively-researched, hard-hitting, tell-it-how-is journalism that keeps me coming back to your channel, Georg.

[@kuzan_1959]

As a South African, I am saddened that they never taught us this in school.

[@Yellow-Rose]

😂🤣

[@johnroscoe2406]

By only 3 seconds in, this has the greatest intro of all time: "Greetings, Proletariat! George Washington." Everything you do is gold. Please never ever change your style.

[@crazymage9636]

"Named after Tesla coils in command and conquer red alet", threw my head back with laughter! This is just great. 👍

[@Gloops01]

He also revolutionised the perfume industry by secreting an aromatic substance from glands in his abdomen.

[@lucasomalley]

I used to believe that Elon was a dbag. I had no idea he was so principled, brave, and altruistic. I now have a new found respect for this man.

[@BB-te8tc]

I loved the part where he single-handedly took out a Hind-D armed only with a rocket launcher. What an incredible man.

[@playboysadness6494]

Don’t forget gorgeous! And slightly spicy

[@listigerlurch4340]

That must be the extreme altruism I am hearing alot about lately!

[@BB-te8tc]

I'll bet that Simpsons episode with him has aged remarkably well now.

[@kelleybenne77]

Although he didn't invent the electric car, he was allowed to sell them.

[@akgarada]

I would not be surprised if that how Elon sees himself.

[@samk522]

"No world shall be beyond my rule; no enemy shall be beyond my wrath." -Elon Musk

[@davidlean1060]

This quote has inspired me to invent a new word game. You come up with a quote as you have done and the game is to decide whether it was said by a Star Trek villain or Musk! Fun for all the family this christmas!

[@samk522]

@@davidlean1060 I would love to take credit, but this quote is actually the Emperor of Mankind from Warhammer 40k. Glad I was able to inspire a new game, though!

[@TheOnlyCathyCat]

It's one hell of an achievement to become the punchline of the world in 2022, a year in which competition for the title of "World's Biggest Dickhead" has been so strong.

[@accountnumber90]

He's gonna buy KZbin just to get this taken down.

[@LaurieKoudstaal]

Because he's so modest?

[@BB-te8tc]

This sounds like the Wikipedia article of a video game antagonist who was immensely popular in the first two games, but has been part of the in-game mythology of dozens upon dozens of sequels and prequels and ill-advised plotlines involving cloning and time travel, to the point that they're directly responsible for everything that has happened in the in-franchise universe.

[@Bleilock1]

And it turns out he aint smart the way public thinks of him

[@nicanornunez9787]

Yeah truly the Andrew Ryan of our universe, but even Smarter and cool. And Loved unconditionally by his father.

[@notbaldfrost]

Every villain is really just part-him.

[@frenchguitarguy1091]

Are you talking about doctor who??

[@kimmatzen6504]

Wow. I didn't even know he invented Tesla and PayPal. No one ever mentions them. What a great guy.

[@Gubru]

this brings a tear to my eye. everytime i feel down at my dead-end minimum wage job, i donate what little savings i have (often incurring more debt) to God Emperor Musk, because i know it is put to better use in his loving hands.

[@ldsr8911]

I like how you saved the biggest, most definite truth until the end. His dad loves him so very much.

[@25EZpcs.]

I wonder if my grandparents and (redacted) friends would think this is real

[@wingflanagan]

I’m just waiting. You _know_ the Sarcasm Impaired are on their way….

[@retlaw83]

As someone who lived in South Africa from the late 80s through the end of Apartheid, and then moved back to the US, I can confirm that all of this is true.

[@ethanisfancy]

I'm glad that someone FINALLY made an Elon Musk biography with FACTS

[@crmesson22k]

Lmao

[@jtgd]

N Logic

[@thesmiffable]

@@jtgd beat me to it

[@patanouketgersiflet9486]

@@thesmiffable The most faithful, factual biography of Elon Musk you'll ever find is that by Elon Musk. He'll pay you $50 if you read it ; he'll also solve world hunger and rid Russia of those pesky Ukrainians.

[@Alex-cw3rz]

The fact that I have heard musk fanboys saying thing very similar to this, is so worrying

[@Skreezilla]

people always give Mandella crap for his time on reality TV but he did a great job telling the world about the troubles in Africa, and honestly he was good in breaking bad!

[@TheBanMan]

Shame about his cartel connections from his youth in Chile

[@CaminoAir]

Thank you. You've put all my concerns about Musk to rest. Wonderful work as usual, Georg.

[@blah2blah65]

Same here! And no doubt this video has served to soothe the wounded, flimsy egos of the Twitter employees recently fired, pushed over the edge, or fearing for their jobs. It's nice that we can all universally love Elon once again, as has been foretold.

[@CaminoAir]

@@blah2blah65 Amen.

[@user-ellievator]

Glad to see that there is finally an unbiased, truthful account of the life of the greatest man who ever lived™

[@thegrandbeef]

Thank you. I come here to be educated. Just like Elon was educated, we're so alike. I can't wait for your next film. I'll be trembling for it.

[@GorilieVR]

i shudder with anticipation 🥵

[@TurtleShellProductions]

Let's be honest, if Elon Musk was a bond villain, bond wouldn't need to do anything because he'd self sabotage.

[@definepoetic]

I had gleeful forgotten about the existence of Janet Street-Porter. Great factual video!

[@eddiewillers1]

Surprised that champagne Socialist is still alive!

[@darkchild130]

Georg being the least sarcastic Englishman

[@MRSXIV]

Have been following you for a few years now, (Human Centipede videos) & I’ve got to admit, you’re one of my favourite guys on KZbin… Such wittiness, we don’t find elsewhere & the topics are always very interesting! Thank you Georg!

[@primerim2799]

If you watch this over and over again - it becomes a reality. That’s wen plastic turns in to gold.

[@xBINARYGODx]

lol

[@sprobablycancr4457]

@@xBINARYGODx 110010101101010100110100010110010101001010

[@zoopdterdoobdter5743]

You forgot the parts where he banished the Void Dragon to Mars, added a third strand to our DNA and is presently building the first McDonald's franchise location on the moon. 😏

[@Pancunian]

That just sound far-fetched!

[@SebastianKurek]

I was holding out so well until "...his running mate, intellectual powerhouse and renowned journalist, Joe Rogan..." where I almost collapsed from laughter. That was overkill.

[@IntenseVisuals]

100% accurate. My dad works at Twitter.

[@hazardeur]

can he try to throw something heavy and/or disgusting at that douchebag? it would make my day. no, actually my whole week.

[@MrLeafeater]

Finally! I tried reading the official, full-length Biography, but it was just so heavy. Thanks for condensing it into something a loser like me can start to wrap my "mind" around.

[@ravenlord4]

He's also presently liberating Mars from the Lizard People. He traveled there once personally in one of his Tesla vehicles.

[@main_sequence]

As a South American this had me rolling over the floor with laughter. I absolutely lost it when you made the joke about the thing. It's funny because it's true! Well done, Sir

[@rusalexander1757]

Jesus, I got catfished for a second, there, Georg. I seriously thought he was a scumbag, but you have made me see the light and the truth. Thank you, my brother.

[@8bvg300]

Wow. I never knew the history of the man. He truly is the greatest American that ever lived.

[@j.2512]

the greatest african american for sure

[@DlcEnergy]

White Privilege + Black Privilege isn't a privilege, it's a gift, and you use it for the good of mankind.

[@vitorafmonteiro]

He's so great he can be the greastest American while being South African.

[@doratheexploder286]

a beautiful story about a truly great man. A shame the video was too short, and had no place for the times when bald eagles would entrust their young in Elons care, and how he would personally travel the world helping to end deforestation by putting down saplings in each footstep he left in the arid lands, and flowers would bloom, even if it was not yet the season for them.

[@brianyule1289]

I believe that's coming in the special edition director's cut.

[@piotrmroczkowski2324]

He single handedly reintroduced the Californian Condor, acting as both parents for the hatchlings, regurgitating rotting meat into their sweet little beaks. Then he stopped the homelessness crisis in California, by just buying everyone living on the street a home. He is like Mother Theresa, if Mother Theresa had any compassion, and cared about others.

[@unstoppableExodia]

@@piotrmroczkowski2324 ah mother Theresa, the most messed up Albanian since Enver Hoxha

[@ricksanchez3628]

Nelson Mandela's Apostle 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@im_lennie]

I can't tell if the voice crack in the beginning is intentional or not. Funny either way

[@TheBigAyland]

Elon proves that all the money in the world can't buy an ounce of social skills

[@goonsta]

Completely unbiased, and thoroughly researched, I liked how you provided a grounded human perspective of our god-king.

[@dayvancubensis]

“…Elon founded Tesla, named after Tesla Coils in Command & Conquer Red Alert.” This line broke me. I grew up playing Red Alert 2, and that game was how I learned of Tesla in the first place. It’s come full circle now.

[@ocdmusic]

This is the biographical masterpiece I didn't know I needed!!! I thank thee!

[@dinogt8477]

no one cares

[@ocdmusic]

@@dinogt8477 everyone cares!

[@atlanta2076]

@@dinogt8477 I am nobody. And it's true what you're saying. I care a LOT! :D

[@ogungou9]

@@dinogt8477: You're right, I'm no one and I care!

[@TheMrWillje]

This is A+ satire You should be proud of yourself.

[@alun7006]

Perhaps the finest biography ever committed to tape. Superlative.

[@sprobablycancr4457]

I've been taking those recently, been really backed up.

[@Lupinvej]

Elon saved me from myself, he's just that good.

[@romirik]

Oscar for best short documentary is on the way.

[@SchlangeVonEden]

I am glad that the whole, unadorned truth about this great man has finally been told. Did you know that Elon has as many, or more, doctoral titles as some other people? Incredible!

[@Patrick-bu5vy]

Elon - inventor of lithium, the Higgs Boson, and yellow skittles.....what a genius!

[@ssj3gohan456]

somebody watches Patrick Boyle

[@RM-el3gw]

Yet another retelling of Elon's story that serves well to remind us of why he is our daddy. Can't wait for the hyperloop to Mars!

[@m1activealesis551]

Tears in my eyes..... ALL hail space Jesus!

[@coreyjones9183]

Ya know, I was super confused about the Rick Grimes thumbnail for a second and then I realized in realtime..."Oh...Yeah...Grimes..."

[@maccumhaill5534]

You broke my brain George.

[@fashionsbyohrbachs]

I can confirm that every word of this is true, scout’s honor.

[@Craxin01]

Man, you broke my snark-o-meter! It collapsed into a singularity!

[@headlessspaceman5681]

This is a pretty good intro to the Book of Elon but you did forget to mention his superspeed, his ability to see perfectly in the dark, and the webs that shoot out of his ass that enable him to swing from tall buildings and bridges. I mean, I know, it's so obvious that you didn't think it was even worth mentioning.

[@godweenausten]

"Tesla, named after the Tesla Coils from C&C: Red Alert" Thank you Georg, for never shying away from telling the truth!

[@girlspooptoo8567]

I’ve heard of Elon but never knew of his great accomplishments Thanks

[@rtqii]

When QElon was born, there was a supernova that appeared on Earth for the first time. When QElon was 3, he was playing in mud and invented bricks. This started QElon's path to construct a modern society, using his patented brick technology. Rocket technology was used to produce the material for the bricks, demonstration bricks were actually sold for $200 each... Eventually the bricks will be produced for 10 cents each. This is how QElon showed humanity how to make BIG money.

[@seban678]

This is why I don't watch TV anymore. You don't get this caliber of unbiased documentary-making on TV.

[@chenzenzo]

On a break from work at UPS and finally get to watch one of your videos right after it comes out! Cheers all!

[@sprobablycancr4457]

You work at an uninterruptable power supply?

[@chenzenzo]

@@sprobablycancr4457 I am an uninterruptable power supply.

[@jasonperez7443]

This is the type of storytelling I can only imagine they probably do in places like North Korea when talking about Kim Jong-un.

[@allenu]

Never heard of this Elon guy before, but now I feel like I'm fully caught up. Thanks for the video!

[@xtiphuny89]

Your Red Alert reference was superb. Coincidentally, that game was my first introduction to the Tesla Coil 😂 ahh to be 10 again on summer break… cheers to that!

[@jangyman]

When I see Elon's image, looking at me with unconditional love and compassion, I can't overcome the impulse to avert my glance, in shame and unworthiness.

[@artemismoonbow2475]

Dr of Philosophy in Memetic Psychology: Now I understand his brilliant thought leadership via the social media platform. I was blind, but now I see.

[@MrZsolto]

This is the highest effort shitpost I've seen recently. Or ever, really. Bravo!

[@cozycoil5516]

The true story of a true heroic man.

[@sprobablycancr4457]

Totally. Balls of ham.

[@gannas42]

That smile at the end. How can one not love Georg?

[@victory7213]

This is gold , every minute greater than the last

[@robinsanders5541]

Gadzooks George! You’ve hit the nail on the head!

[@user-account-not-found]

This is the world we live in and I love it.

[@swgdsm]

Georg, this is brilliant. I love you, Dad.

[@homosexualpanic]

Wait, is your dad Elon or Georg?

[@swgdsm]

@@homosexualpanic choose your own adventure my friend

[@nagualdesign]

Spot on. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I love you, Georg. x

[@Chris.Davies]

I remember his COBOL version of PLATO on our PDP-11, but it wouldn't compile, and preferred to RUD in the core memory.

[@sebastianhollmichel9566]

I was smiling, but with "Tesla coils from Comman and Conquer" you got me spit my coffee

[@TheFrogfather1]

You just know someone will now be working on translating Plato into cobol don't you?

[@Ms.Sparkles]

Best documentary I have ever seen I should spread the word of our one true Savior

[@Comrade_Jason]

South African here. I died when you said "that was a young Nelson Mandela" 🤣

[@dfailsthemost]

Just as the video ended, the ad I got was for that Santa kills bad guys movie that is coming out. It was perfect.

[@johnmiller2691]

It's amazing that Elon probably has this running through his head constantly. He's like Carmen in that South Park episode where his memory keeps changing to make him look better and better.

[@ricksanchez3628]

Imagine being the first person to point out a miss-fact

[@jiggystardust]

That was a real Aphex Twin grin at the end, Bravo!

[@mups4016]

One of your best videos to date.

[@eldorados_lost_searcher]

Good to see a piece finally come out that is totally unbiased and truthful about the true übermensch that is Elon Musk.

[@thedude5295]

This is no more or less accurate than anything that CNN or MSNBC puts out everyday. Well done, Georg.

[@Malky24]

You missed out that time he pissed an unbroken stream for over 2 minutes at Lionel Richie's house live on Twitch then dedicated it to the memory of his brother Kimbal who is still alive but is being hunted by the FBI after escaping custody when the bus transporting him to prison was hit by a train. #3LitrePeter

[@CaptWesStarwind]

Watching Musk run Twitter has been like watching Dale Earnhardt run the last lap of the Daytona 500.

[@paegr]

turns out running a social media platform isn't much like running a used car dealership

[@whiterottenrabbit]

You forgot to mention that he knows more about manufacturing, and also of course about everything else, more than anyone currently alive in the universe.

[@derheadbanger9039]

Can you believe, somebody so accomplished and genius as Elon has also a great sense of humor - especially about himself?

[@beatrixwickson8477]

I wasn't sure this was all on the up and up but the ending convinced me.

[@B1ggz13]

"Greetings proletariat!" is the best intro ever hahaha

[@nNiceDreamsMadeTrue]

At first having been interrupted by an update while stuck in a boisterous brothers binge seemed tedious, but for our great Idol Elon of course one must make sacrifices