English Teacher Rewrites "Thor: Love and Thunder"

"Thor: Love and Thunder" is a bit of a controversial movie. As someone who cares about storytelling, let's see if I can take what Taika Waititi made and improve it.
My website: jrwrites1999.wixsite.com/jona...
Email: [e-mail]
Chapters:
0:00 Intro
0:47 Problem 1: Thor's Arc
1:53 Problem 2: Gorr
2:45 Problem 3: No Sense of Urgency
4:15 Act 1
7:48 Act 2
10:41 Act 3
17:41 Outro
All clips used in this video fall under fair use as they are part of my critique/review.

[@kaiakeenn6430]

The illustrations are surprisingly good-looking, even for rough sketch standards, you might wanna consider a career in art as well, about the film, my brothers and I always say that if the audience spends their time after the film talking about how the film could've been made differently to make it better instead of saying, wow, that was just right, then you've failed as a writer because the story you chose is supposed to be the very best version of the film so much so that all other versions just disappears out of the audiences mind as they watch, I mean that's why you're being paid millions and we're left to our imagination, sadly that's how most marvel films feel lately, the films don't feel like a natural continuation of how things should normally go, for example, thor 4 is just a shoe-horned thor sequel, it doesn't really add anything to thor that we didn't have before the film existed, anyways nice video.

[@RoughestDrafts]

Thank you so much for all the kind words! I do love to doodle as a pastime, haha. I think it's rare that I've ever left a theater and thought "There's nothing I would've changed about that movie." Most scripts will inevitably be imperfect, mostly due to time constraints. Superhero movies are especially suffering right now because studios feel an urgent need to mass-produce them. I completely agree with you; this film ultimately just felt expected, not necessary.

[@GPowersTrainer]

This is what Thor: Love and Thunder should’ve been! I like how you connected it back with Infinity War and how you still in a way involved the Multiverse.

[@RoughestDrafts]

Hey, thank you! Thanks so much for watching and commenting. I was just thinking today about how disjointed phase four felt. I'm glad to hear I worked in some relevant concepts well, haha

[@ederdiaz1639]

This is actually really cool.. loved the drawings.. and certainly an interesting rewrite.. I would love to see other rewrites from you.. This is seriously underrated.. I hope that you will soon find success

[@RoughestDrafts]

Thanks so much for the kind words! I definitely love doing rewrites and flexing my creative muscles. But I also like doing video essays, which is what I’m mainly working on at the moment. If I think of any more rewrites to do, or if you have any suggestions, I’ll try to hop on it. Thanks so much for watching and for the comment!

[@Demonoicgamer666]

I like the movie too but the greatest flaw in my opinion is the fact we are told gorr is a god killer but we don’t see him kill another god after his god.

[@RoughestDrafts]

Definitely. What's that rule in writing? Tell, don't show? They nailed it. /s

[@Demonoicgamer666]

@@RoughestDrafts my English teacher used to tell use if we ever made a story where a character gives exposition about a important event unless done right that’s bad because you are telling a potential better story. Being told how powerful and strong gorr is says we are missing out on a better story of a guy who strikes gods with fear at the mere mention of his name we saw glimpse of that better story in the film specifically in the scene where Zeus the second strongest and most powerful god in omnipotent city is afraid if we got more of that this movie would be great it’s good to hear content create know this. My English teacher always told us “show don’t tell”

[@RoughestDrafts]

@@Demonoicgamer666 Right, sorry, I was being sarcastic. "Show don't tell" is the rule haha. I agree with you, the movie did far too much telling.

[@mack2896]

I’m crying at your scene between Thor and Jane. Gosh dang it.

[@aakashaich]

This was phenomenal! A great rewrite. Absolutely entertaining stuff 👍

[@RoughestDrafts]

Thank you! That’s so kind of you. Thanks for watching

[@PonderingPsyche-sq2fc]

Damn dude this literally brought me to tears. Amazing

[@indecisive2insomniac610]

I loved this! I'm currently going through and rewriting the entire movie, and have gotten to the second chapter now. So this was really cool to see and keep in mind during my writings.

[@cakebirrd1186]

Fantastic rewrite!!! I found the motives much easier to understand in your version and the drawings added a lot of flavor and helped convey scenes and tones well 😊

[@thesausageman5388]

9:03 Bechdel Test achieved

[@Jamfrog35]

this...this is art. However, I feel like Thor should still have some sort of struggle of losing people close to him in some scenes, still dealing with the loss of his mother and brother and basically his entire kingdom if I have to be honest, but the inclusion of the snap is a genius way to tie in Thor's grave mistake of not aiming for the head, I love it and I kind of felt bad that they didn't brought that up in the movie. It would have a bigger impact to Gor more than "god being bunch of jerk faces" Maybe during the blimp he tried to reach to other gods to help him, but they are unable to bring her back from the snap, which grow his hatred to the gods and when he finds the sword, it poison his mind, and the rest of her returning back to the world would work out even more. I also like the direction with Jane on this one too. I always felt like she was a bit too corny as mighty Thor.

[@RoughestDrafts]

Hey, thank you for the kind words! I see where you’re coming from. Having Thor take responsibility for the other losses in his life certainly would add more oomf to his journey in Love and Thunder. I don’t think Jane is too corny as Thor in concept. The comics use the premise incredibly well (in my opinion). The execution in L+T left a little something to be desired.

[@NeonDeity]

I very much like this, very cool fun drawings btw!

[@RoughestDrafts]

Haha, thank you! Thanks so much for watching, glad you enjoyed

[@Ben_Holt_Music]

Thank you Roughest, very cool

[@ESK0VER0_x]

Glad I found this channel

[@RoughestDrafts]

That's so kind of you! Thank you

[@Cosmoandtherobins]

love the drawings

[@RoughestDrafts]

Haha, thank you! Definitely the most time-consuming part of the video

[@kaiakeenn6430]

I have no doubt it was

[@kgotlaseme47]

My biggest problem with the movie is it failed to do what the comics did perfectly For one every time Gorr appeared, I was genuinely worried for Thor coz they repeatedly showed how terrifying Gorr was, they showed his trail of destruction,him overpowering several Gods...the movie kinda did tell don't show, not a single scene there was I intimidated by Gorr Also Thor's internal conflict about Gorr being right to some degree just wasn't as heavy in the movie, in the comics it felt like one way or another Thor wasn't strong enough to kill Gorr and even if he could, that wouldn't solve the real problem ,the fact that Gorr was kind of right. Even if he died, several Gods were terrible to their people and that's something Thor couldn't change, let alone by just killing Gorr They even show Gorr suffering by his god's hands in more depth were he was being shunned for doubting the gods, only for him to see all the believers starve to death

[@Howie_vibeMaster]

I liked thor love and thunder but I still recognized it had flaws, so I really enjoyed this rewrite, making goor have a more personal reason to hate thor really adds to the story a lot more than the original story, love the art you did for this, especially this one 8:12

[@justopher8487]

I just noticed that they used the "Sleepytime" theme from Bluey

[@RoughestDrafts]

Haha, I love that episode. I’d like to do a video on it. The song is originally from a suite called The Planets by Gustav Holst. That movement in particular is called “Jupiter.” All the music in this video is from that suite

[@justopher8487]

@@RoughestDrafts thats really cool, I know Bluey uses a lot of classical music for their episodes.

[@Ponakalaranjit456]

Dude, you should be a Storyboard Artist.

[@crypticdoesmappingterribly]

you could rewrite Black Adam?

[@Abridgimation]

I fell asleep watching this movie with a mate. In my defense I did pull an all nighter lmao.

[@franciosdelamerdu9235]

Omg that was amazing

[@Cosmoandtherobins]

shout out english

[@demianoff]

didnt li ke The Fridge of Jane also, gorr dughter should die during the fight that killed loki. No uatu, keep the original plan

[@kgotlaseme47]

Definitely better than the movie