Enkay47- im not okay

[@Enkay47]

Lyrics in description. From ages 8-12, I dealt with a lot of abuse. I never told anyone because I was afraid of being viewed as weak or as less of a man. So instead of telling anyone about it, I escaped with music and poetry. I’m 25 years old now and I finally told my parents about what happened to me. It took me over a DECADE to feel safe enough to talk to my family about what I went through… that’s not okay. I could have saved myself a lot of heartache and suffering if I found the courage to speak up and tell them what I was going through. I’m sharing this song with the world in the hopes to inspire people to tell their stories. If you’ve been through any sort of abuse, SPEAK UP. Tell someone before it’s too late. Growing up, I never heard ANYONE talk about this, especially in hip hop music. If I had heard someone, anyone, open up about their story, it might have inspired me to vocalize what I was going through as a kid. My goal is to help create a world where people feel safe sharing their stories. I’m being vulnerable in an effort to help others feel like they’re not alone. If you’re NOT OKAY, that’s OKAY. Just don’t bottle it up. You’re not alone. ❤️

[@amandahallman3707]

Enkay47 thank you. It will be okay. You are okay. Song gave me chills. 💙💙💙

[@EvilJesus33]

You're steady growing brother.

[@beautifulblessing]

Thank you

[@AWRemixAI]

What a LEGEND you are bro! You are not weak, in fact, this song proves just how strong you are. I felt that energy since I heard your music for the first time. 🅴🅽🅺🅰🆈47 🅻🅴🅶🅴🅽🅳

[@Whitening98]

Bro this song, speechless. Your one of my favorite artist.

[@Indieblackmagic]

Even after the countless hours editing this, I still gets chills. Forever legendary 🔥

[@Enkay47]

Love you homie. Thank you so much for creating this with me.

[@jodesbromwell8886]

The number 47 guided this song into my life thank you ❤️

[@lindathao6303]

​@@Enkay47stay strong too god loves you

[@roloayers4587]

​@@lindathao6303​​​​ ​If there was a god then he wouldn't of been fu*king molested in the first place. Same as me, if there was a god then i wouldn't of got abused when i was a young child. Same as my mum, if there was a god then my mother wouldn't of got breast cancer and she's not even a bad person, she's been a nurse for years, dedicated to helping others and she finds out she's got breast cancer and not only that, she's also got inoperable cancer in her neck, so yeah no fu*king god.

[@juggalo6291]

Damn, bro. I imagine it took a lot for you to not only write this song, but to share it for everyone to hear. That's what I, along with many others, greatly respect about you. It's ok to not be ok. Keep your head up, man ❤

[@Enkay47]

This one was hard to release. I needed to though. I lived in fear of judgement for most of my life. I want others to know it’s okay to tell their story.

[@nevaehharris9562]

I've been through this man

[@OnlyMetal4Me]

As a man who is the exact same age as you and dealt with the same s*xual abuse from ages 6-10 this song made me fully bawl my eyes out with tears. I finally had a breakdown last year and ended up in therapy, my family still don't know but from it I was able to confide in friends I trusted and it felt like a weight off my shoulders. This song gave me the courage to share this comment with you, it will be okay Thank you Enkay, I mean that most sincerely. Please keep doing what you're doing, much love brother 🖤

[@Enkay47]

I’m genuinely sorry you had to go through that, but I’m glad this song is able to help you. Having friends like that is really a gift, I hope you can have that difficult conversation in your family soon.. it’s hard but it really helps. Leaving everything in the shadows allows shame and fear to fester, shedding light on it heals your wounds. Wishing you the best man, thank you so much for this comment ❤️

[@vincentboisvert4673]

my friend opened up about his abuse years after it happened and once we talked about it openly he could finally move on and now he is a really happy person.

[@canisXpolaris]

Unfortunately, in my case, no one believed me, not even my mom. She called me multiple "lady of the night" names I gave up telling anyone. I got into more abusive situations. In and out of hard drug addictions Thank you, so much, for sharing your story. I'm not so alone

[@Enkay47]

I’m so sorry you went through that.❤️

[@dLEARiousZ]

I just want everyone to know that its ok to not be ok, just seek help, its out there. Also therapy through music is a good start, much love to Enkay for speaking out on such a hard subject, love ya bro!

[@Enkay47]

Love you homie

[@RollingThunder85]

To whom do you reach out to and what can or will they help me with

[@dLEARiousZ]

@@RollingThunder85 therapists are a good start, they can help you in dealing with issues you don’t like to talk about with friends and family.

[@Itzmonday1]

Thanks!

[@Enkay47]

Thank you so much

[@StephanieHendricks333]

The way this was felt was as if I was in this video and it was my life…………. Because it truly was …….. ……… ……. Thank you for reminding me that I was NEVER alone. …. That other people feel our pain. I was also 8.

[@Whos_Angel_bro]

🔥🔥the song is fire and emotional I'm so so sorry you went through that Nathan, we all go through hell and your music has helped me and alot of others cope

[@Enkay47]

Don’t be, I’m proud of who I am. Appreciate you 🙏🏻

[@stonedgoddess420]

Brave man for talking about it and making a song about it, im sure everyone out there that can relate really appreciates this , keep the good work up dude!

[@Evanz111]

Amazing channel name! I love it :’)

[@xxwickedtryhardxx1686]

I was molested before 7 had depression sense 7 this song made me cry hard

[@aliramono6768]

It takes a lot of courage to tell a story like this. Your music is inspiring. I hope it gives others a way to heal through their own traumas as well. Thank you for being so brave & hopefully the song encourages others to also heal. Your music is therapy. 💙

[@Enkay47]

❤

[@Itzmonday1]

Thanks! You are the goat

[@Enkay47]

Thank you. ❤️

[@Itzmonday1]

@@Enkay47 no thank you for all you do

[@Im_StillAsleep]

Yuhh first

[@janeehiett98]

Thank you for sharing this. What you are doing WILL help others to open up about their experiences. I too, was molested as a child. It’s f’d me up for decades with alcohol, drugs and other shit that I’d rather not talk about on this platform. I am sober now as well and admittedly, am able to experience actual joy in life. I still struggle, I still cry and break down more than I should at times, I’ve almost died from a suicide attempt then slit my wrist open after that first real attempt. Thankfully, I realized that I didn’t really want to die before I even finished dragging that carving knife across my wrist. I called 911 myself. Again, thank you for your music and your strength to open up about your own experiences. Your doing this will save lives. Love to you and your music. - J

[@Enkay47]

I’m sorry you dealt with that janee… it sounds like we‘ve been dealt some pretty similar cards. Congratulations on being sober though, idk you but I’m proud of you. Keep going and never give up on life. People like us were given the opportunity to help others in similar situations, we can’t let that go to waste. Sending love and positivity. ❤️🙌

[@Judy-ln5di]

Journey to be great and beautiful when living ✨💕

[@Judy-ln5di]

God bless the truth 🙏and paint are faces as warriors 🙏of our

[@Massofman]

Just got the notigraph and damn this is so powerful!

[@Enkay47]

Thank you bro. That means a lot coming from you. ❤️

[@StephanieHendricks333]

I’m not one to share. I’m not one to open up and be able to talk about feelings and things like that but this spoke to me in a way that I’ve never been able to speak out about or confess to until now. …. I felt this in every way possible. The things I went through and the people who tried to silence me………. At least I’m not alone.

[@revablack968]

Im so glad i got lost in the deep world of youtube videos and stunbled upon you and your music. 🔥🥵🔥🥵🔥🥵

[@kingiez4209]

I found you back 4 years ago and I've listened to your music for 4 years keep it up dude you come a long way

[@dianabaker4380]

One of the realest and hardest songs I listen to, most days i can't and some days it's a blessing tho it feels selfish to feel its a blessing cause it hurts to know that you know how it feels, ain't sth we wish on anyone not even our enemies

[@Gage_Bertovich]

This one hit home man, all I can say is I know what you're going for. Music is one of the best ways to cope. Love you man

[@Enkay47]

❤️

[@Shark_Studios2]

So real I can feel it in every word.

[@JacksonPierce]

This is so powerful brother. Much love.

[@isaiahsetzer8161]

This song made me cry it hit my heart hard I’m sorry brotha but I’m always here if you need to talk or any no one is alone

[@Enkay47]

This song makes me cry nearly every time I play it. I performed it for the first time in Seattle and started sobbing in front of the crowd. That’s GOOD though. Healing is painful.

[@MJ-nl9hs]

It’s okay to not be okay we all have our secrets of what we went through much respect for this song and opening up about your situation when you were younger

[@tylerb556]

This is going to be deep 🔥🔥🔥💯💯

[@ElaciousAnjel]

I'm in tears right now. I can feel you through your music and it's beautiful. You are not alone. Thank you for sharing. 🙏

[@D34dm4nk1ll1ng]

@Enkay47 when i was younger i was abused and to an extent no one talked about it no one every really did anything about it... ur song definitely hits different, and the shittiest part is, iv recently found out that iv compartmentalized what had happened and never worked through it, but as of recently i have been and then to find this song it means everything.... much love from one victor to another ..... "victor" (putting one foot infront of the other not loosing the battle) and anytime you or anyone for that fact doesn't feel like they can stand on their own well be one another's rock..

[@wrigleyy69]

I'm 40 now, but still live in the years of ages 5-8. My friend I trusted molested me and if I told anyone I would be in trouble. I can't escape that pain no matter what! Your song gives me amazing chills, vibes, and I don't feel alone with your words! I've listened to you since your first freestyle in your car 6 years ago!! Thank you for being you man!

[@MIVidaLoca666]

I was molest by my oldest brother and my older cousin I got silenced all my life took me until I'm 35yrs old to finally speak up and not care about making the family mad

[@melvinazor7041]

Discovered this guy from Matthew tuck last year and listened to his popular songs last month, I'm glad KZbin recommended him again because it's the perfect timing while I'm feeling completely alone, this is very helpful!

[@Mandydavisinkedupblonde]

❤️ very proud 👏 first step is speaking.. ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@carolebrooks6264]

OMG! That is soooo f*#%ing powerful!!!!! You had me almost fall to the floor. Tears in my eyes. Lumps in my through. I applaud you. I hear you. I believe you. It was NEVER your fault. You are not alone! Thank you soooooo much for making this and for sharing it here. You are a hero!!! 💪👏👏👏👏👏👏

[@victorparedes6044]

I been pushing the algorithm, listening to new music all day, and this song is undeniably the hit of the day, the hidden gem. Thank you Enkay, keep doing what you're doing, we need more music like this.

[@dianabaker4380]

I don't understand why normal people who didn't face anything like this get annoyed when they hear me playing this song like it's personally offending them somehow but idgaf what they think or feel, I'm always gonna play real music i relate to. Thank you for making music nate. You're amazing

[@lovelypaige5501]

Yessss I’ve been waiting!!!

[@Itzmonday1]

❤thank you man luv the music 🙏

[@Officially-Anti-LGBTQ]

i shed tears listening to this, my guy you’re incredible in every way and you’re incredibly strong for sharing your story in these trying times, keep your head up and keep smiling because we all love you and wish you the best in this life.❤️

[@OutcastWrestling620]

What an amazing song with an even better message.

[@Ilovemems]

I love your stuff

[@jameshardy3051]

this song is so powerful there no words to describe how this song made me feel bc ive gone through this to and i told my mom and dad when i was 18 and it was years before that when everything happened i just wanna say thank you for opening up and writing this song and ik its not easy at all to do that let alone make a song about it so thank you

[@nataliek4333]

This is amazing but oh my god can I give you a hug you are amazing angel and so strong you deserve all the love and shouldn’t of had to go through that angel ! Much love keep being you ❤

[@BlightMind]

The one reason why I listen cause you’re raw and authentic. Beautiful track man🔥🔥 speaks volumes. Definitely wanna collab with you soon. Much love Blight Mind 🙏🏼

[@kaydenbrower362]

This song,it hit deep. Instant tears, I can’t put into words how beautiful this song is. Thank you so much for sharing this🖤

[@no7627]

It's always hard to let out our feelings to other people but you told yours with thousands of people and I believe there's still hope for us if we let out our stories too

[@philipwynia5371]

Just wanted to say thank you for writing this! It's helped me, I was molested by a babysitter when I was 3. I tried telling my mom around that time but she never understood my words then. I'm 34 now, but allot of the times I remember exactly what happened. When I was in high school I was working at a store and I saw that same babysitter come into the store and I hid in the back room, I was scared. Thank you for speaking out! Ik it's hard and not alot of people talk about it but I believe this will help alot of people, from the bottom of my heart, thank you

[@Rednekplay]

Dam man I feel like you know who I am I grew up my hole life believe the if I show any negative emotions the I was les a man until as u put it until the day I woke up and new I was grate

[@KatherineKieras]

You're both courageous brave men. Thank you for this. Thank you for being vulnerable in order to help others dealing with this. ❤❤

[@shockzbaby7975]

Nathan… I’ve been waiting for this song to drop since you showed us part of it. I want you to know I’m BEYOND PROUD OF YOU! You are NOT alone. This song makes me want to give a big ass hug bro. We had a lot of deep conversations but this hit hard. I related so much (being a female at that) I’ve held so much in. Still do. It’s okay to be open. You know how many people you just saved with this song? You’re a inspiration. Your strength just helped hundreds of other people be strong. You’re amazing Nate. Love you bro… - Hayley…

[@itsJoeKMusic]

Great song man. 🔥🫡

[@Enkay47]

Thanks Joe

[@LADYxREBEL]

your braveness is so rare now days your a better person for doing this we need more people like you around

[@trent3504]

Wow thankyou for this song... I was molested as a kid by my mother's so called friends and this song made me realise I'm not weak to speak. Everyone needs to speak up men or women. I know I'm not weak now I'm a fighter and survivor thanks to your music. You saved me from a dark path. I now know I'm here for a reason and it's time to take the steps to change. You are underrated and people need to know your name and music . 2023 is enkay47s year.

[@michellemims4269]

I'm so proud of you for finally telling your parents about it. It took alot of courage to make this song. I know it will help alot of people that listen to your music. You have always helped me thru your music and here is another song that is helping me. Keep making music cause I dont know where I would be in my life if it wasnt for your song Set Me Free.

[@Enkay47]

Thanks Michelle

[@michellemims4269]

@@Enkay47 your welcome thank you for being you and making your music

[@michelleelle97]

I don’t usually listen to this type of music anymore but this one got me especially going through something similar I feel like I’m healing enough to listen to this type of music again

[@TheyWantUSilent]

Holy shit. As a 45 year old man who completely understands this and feels it to my core, I have to say thank you for making this song. Im balling my eyes out right now, but I am o.k. now. I spent far too many years not letting anyone know that I really wasn't ok. ...I wish I had this song at least 30 years ago. 💔

[@Rv3TRIPS]

Started from the bottom bro. Now look where you're at. You're my fucking hero bro. Every song you've ever posted has kept me sane and always pushing forward. Idk how you do this every day man, but holy fuck I respect and care for you so much. Keep fighting that fight bro. If God tries to lay another hand on you, I'll be more than happy to lay this heavy hammer of a fist on top of anyone that tries. Much love bro 🤘

[@WonderingNomad311]

Thank you for this! I went through the same with someone who was a family member, took me along time to heal, this song hit very hard to home! God bless you man, thank you for telling your story ❤🙏

[@H-Pryde]

Amazing song man. Thank you for sharing your life with us. Goosebumps 🙏

[@xxShadowTheScythexx]

... i feel this... That intro, man i was molested to, by friends of my parents, ppl i was supposed to trust... And my little brother suffered the same, after 20+yrs he finally stopped blaming me for not being able to protect him and now we talk once a year on his birthday. Ty for this song. You are not alone in this

[@riikkusga]

It's so important to find songs like this more & more.. To me these bring motivation and trust to go on and dream and great life which now on I have. Opportunity which I didn't have as a child and teenager.. I didn't have a choice to speak or have any support.. Now I have found better environment to live and people to count on

[@sarahjohnson5891]

I went through similar thing as a child, this the one that hit me the hardest when I saw you last year live because it was too close to home for me,I think I started to say it but changed the subject, it's not easy to say it outloud that it happened, worse when its someone close to the family. This is why I love your songs, alot of them hit right where music should.

[@officialwhovillemusic]

I feel your pain bro I'm glad you spoke out cause you are a voice not a lot of people have especially in today's society. I've been abused like that too. Thank you for this song

[@davidc.5703]

AMAZING!!!💯💯💚💜

[@anthony1705]

Brother you have helped me so much these past 4 months. Gf of 2 years cheated on me as I had the ring ready. And tried to end it all. Got out of the hospital and found hope through you. I hope you have someone in your life that helps you like you have helped me and many others. God is with you Nathan

[@Enkay47]

Love you brother. Idk you personally but reading your comment resonated with me.. thank you for this. I hope my music will continue to help you. ❤️

[@anthony1705]

@@Enkay47 The best thing I found is to not look back. Your past doesn’t make you. Shape your future for who you want to be. We’ve both come along ways. Let’s go further

[@x.s.bleeding7780]

Powerful Messages. Big Love and Respect ✊

[@AverageJoe2023]

I’m sorry you went thru all that. Man need to learn how to speak up and you are paving the way for them. Much love

[@Enkay47]

Don’t be, it made me who I am. Appreciate you man. ❤️

[@awesomeperson]

Amazing 🔥 very powerful

[@russellrogers3314]

Honestly ima happy to see some talk bout this subject and your spot on open up is a nightmare everyday I struggle alot growing up ima 30 and I just now started talking bout with my wife and honestly I feel as tho alot of weight was lift off my shoulders

[@lucidnightmare2695]

Standing in the middle of nowhere struggling with ending it all. KZbin randomly starts playing this song on my phone. Thank you.

[@braylathomas3811]

This song cuts deep thank you so much for sharing I appreciate you keeping you in my prayers 🙏

[@Enkay47]

Appreciate you, thank you. 🙌❤️

[@Jwuappbreadbox22]

Amazing bro!!💯

[@RapFanMan1]

Best Shortest 4 min in my life 😭❤️❤️❤️

[@jodesbromwell8886]

I listen to you everyday You inspired me to create my impact statement I’ve gone in circles with for 6 years I still am struggling but I keep listening I wish i could speak up like this

[@OnlyDreamers]

AMAZING SONG! We Love You Brotha and feel your pain. This song will be important to so many people.

[@Enkay47]

Thank you guys. You were one of the very first people I showed this song to, I remember all of us crying in the studio listening to it haha. Love you fr bro, thank you. ❤️

[@OnlyDreamers]

@@Enkay47 Love you too brotha

[@Jyang.11]

Nathan is my favorite of all artists, mainly bc his music has a lot of raw emotions & impactful stories. He’s also speaking out in a way which many of us can relate to the songs.

[@tee3287]

amazing song, but so sorry for what you went through. so glad you spoke up, you're an inspiration 🤍🤍🤍

[@Legend5.3]

I hope this reaches everyone. This song speaks on things most people are to ashamed to talk about. Things never get better you just find better ways to deal with things. Keep pushing.

[@rushellehales7179]

Devinely guided Devinely Protected ❣️ Blessings to Us all at the end of the tunnel ❣️🙏🕊️🤍✨

[@Lfg46]

As a survivor myself thank you for making this. 😥😥🙏🙏

[@Enkay47]

❤️ 🇺🇸

[@WarPig2612]

Thank you for sharing your story and empowering others to speak up and reach out for help brother. You used your pain to help others and for that you’re a legend

[@infectedvoid]

oh my god, that's a pure masterpiece. i almost crying right now... so many feels.

[@cata2567]

Thx Can t say to be strong bcs u are already, peace🔥

[@Enkay47]

❤️🙌

[@gonegod6220]

Even though I don't relate to this song, I admire the emotions and vulnerability you showed. We can see it coming straight from the heart. Amazing work, and I wish you all the best.

[@leongreenhalgh9113]

Absolutely brilliant, fair play to you to open up like this in a song, really goes to show that men can and should open up about their feelings more

[@tarar6897]

How can this song be judged when it’s truly about what someone has gone through in their life, especially such an emotional topic? Thank you for sharing your story. I hope this truly helps those who have felt how you have and were afraid to reach out. I went through years of abuse and still working on finding that amazing part but I’ll get there. It took me a long time to open up myself and still have a hard time with reliving the nightmares.Thanks again for bringing awareness so that others may speak out.

[@Enkay47]

Thank you, and I’m sorry that you dealt with years of abuse.. sending love & positivity. Appreciate you. ❤️

[@cosman1969]

What a song who ever you . What a brave lad i thank you

[@Magnesium790]

You are very brave bro, thankyou for sharing this. I understand you on a soul level.., stay strong keep pushing. God bless, Much love.

[@efraindario3059]

This song hits home for me.

[@daianaalessi1227]

You are incredibly strong and brave. Thanks for sharing this, i am a survivor too and this song really hit me. Love u man, greetings from Argentina

[@keilimccormack3013]

I just need to thank you for making this.. this has always been my greatest fear for my children. I have two little boys ages 9 and 7 and the kids you chose in this video happened to look a lot like my kids..... My children have not had an easy life and because of circumstances I cannot change at all for the next two years I cannot have them in my custody. My older son recently came to me and told me things that scare me so much because I'm pretty sure he's telling me this is happening to him or his brother. Yet, when I filed a report and tried to have somebody go out there to take care of it or at least to check on them; they were stonewalled and never even talked to my youngest son (the one that I'm most concerned about) and closed the case, immediately, without even investigating. So your song literally had me sobbing out loud all of the pain and fear inside of myself. I know its time for me to make my next move on this because I will never give up and just allow anything like this to happen... And if I'm wrong: then I'll owe someone an apology but if I am right... How can I call myself Mother I believe my children are being caused this pain? So although it hurts me so much and it scares me to think of what I need to do; thank you for making this song to remind me what I need to focus on. I am so sorry that there was nobody to fight for you, to protect you. I'm trying to protect mine while staying within the limits of the law and it is not easy. and I'm about to give up on the legal side because even if I go to prison: how how can I not justify that, if they get out safe?

[@Crux-Beats]

Stil have a lot of respect for u bro, I love the song even tho it should have been fucking hard to write it...We Deal With So Much Shit Growing up & it doesn't get any better. I still deal with trauma since 5 years old and the hardest part is you remember everything like it was yesterday. I stand with u bro

[@Enkay47]

Appreciate you, thank you. ❤️

[@katiemitchell26]

You're not alone. Same thing happened to me. It was my oldest brother. It breaks constantly because when I finally spoke out they all believed him. And sadly he knew they would. Sometimes I feel like it's my fault.

[@paulhale8205]

It's happened to me when I was younger and everyday I honestly wished I could of disappeared from this earth till I heard this song it is hard to speak about having your inacenses just torn away but no matter what we have to keep on moving....🙏🙏🙏

[@sssghoul9257]

Why does this not have more views. Underrated artist if I’d ever seen one. I’m here to stay. Srry didn’t find it sooner!

[@mracorn2669]

Thanks Nathan I needed a song like this. That's why I stick to gaming because inside the games I can't be hurt anymore like I once was. You're awesome man keep up the music and just remember you aren't alone I'll be here forever.

[@Enkay47]

Let’s play a game sometime, I’d love to hear your story my friend. My psn is @EnkayKawaguchi

[@mracorn2669]

@@Enkay47 alright man I'll add you on Playstation. But I also play PC so if you have any cross network games you could give me your username and I'll add you on there

[@daltonkirby688]

I swear brother, it's like you are telling my story!!! Your music is amazing and it's helped me through alot because knowing I'm not the only one brings me some comfort and the courage to carry on! Thank you so much for all your amazing music! Mush love 🍄 🙌

[@reneeduncan3671]

I just want to applaud u for being so brave it took me 11 yrs and my best friend to go thru it before I had the guts to say anything .... So thank you for letting others know it's not just them there are others out there scared too but we have to speak up because we can't keep running away thany you Nathan #enkay47

[@geesmillardssowat]

BLESS YOU 🙌 GREAT SONG thank-you for sharing your story you absolutely doing 💯 giving through music inspiration 👏

[@saltgaming9682]

I've been trying to find a way to express what I went through and I can never find the words and somehow you found the words I could not, thankyou ❤️ godbless your soul 🙏🙏🙏

[@nathanmerchant9041]

🙏🏻 God bless you and yours 🙏🏻

[@mullilynn9707]

This is one of the most beautiful songs I’ve ever heard. Your story is gonna help so many people. U are a beautiful soul. I love you babe❤

[@jorgeechevarria215]

Prayers to the victims. Great track.😎😎😎👍👍👍🔥🔥🔥🙏🙏