[Ep. 200] American Gladiator Dan "Nitro" Clark Teaches Me About Becoming Vulnerable

[@laurasanjur6414]

one of my first steps and seekings even before I started therapy was with The Artist Way too, 23 years ago wow! I love everything about this conversation/encounter. So rich. Looking foward for the next one. Thank u both! I love your channel Luis...and the music, so groundig...I can feel it in my back, base of the spin, lower organs and feet🐘💜🦄

[@everyonetransitions]

The comment Dan makes about 20 mins in (19:53 - 20:36) about having to figure it all out on his own given the void left by not having a parent/adult comfort, console, or reassure him... I really think this is at the heart of so much pain- his and ours. Our need in this area cannot be overstated. We were supposed to learn how to be with ourselves with and through these big emotions, and that itself is a grief. The conversation that begins at 27:01 is really interesting in that you reveal where you want the conversation to go in a way many other interviewers veil. But doing so gave him an opportunity to respond directly. I enjoyed where the conversation went. That his quiet reading and reflecting "tilled the soil", and *over time* it led him to therapy, to writing a memoir, to acting classes, to the morning pages, gratitude practice, etc., and eventually being able to be in a body that is slowed and warmed by grace and presence... and how that's relatively new for him, in comparison to all the intellectual stuff... yes. It does seem that learning and growing--"healing"--is slow and incremental just like this. In fact, it often happens just like this conversation did- that dropping out of the story and into the body can take time (and, paradoxically, seems to take more time whenever we feel that time is limited). (I wrote the above mostly in real time while watching this, so I hadn't gotten to where you yourself acknowledge this shift in both of you and in the conversation, 39 minutes in, which is so fascinating and cool to see.) My closing thought (for now) is that I don't think the external focus is limited to maleness, masculinity, or men (in wherever combination). I think the external focus is a common and routine way to bypass our emotional body for all genders. I get the sense that you know this deeply and that some part of the conversation was shaped by speaking with a man, but it felt important to underscore. The intellectual mind, and the version of ourself that we see in the mirror or video clips or Facebook posts--that 2D version of ourself--is often the easiest place to escape to when we're not yet ready to feel.