Guessing Random Things About You | ASMR

I guess all sorts of random stuff about you and write it down on my clipboard. This is a new periodic series that replaces the "Guessing Your Name" / "Where You Live" series of videos.
Website ► ephemeralrift.com
Patreon ► bit.ly/1EZgmNi
Listen to selected works outside of KZbin:
Spotify ► bit.ly/1V23U60
CDBaby ► bit.ly/1AUt3Jj
iTunes ► apple.co/1xIHLNd
Podcasts:
EphemRadio (on hiatus) ► apple.co/2afSkZQ
Arkham Sanitarium (on hiatus) ►apple.co/2alraeV
Social Media:
Facebook ► / ephemeralrift1
Twitter ► / ephemeralrift
IG ► / e.rift
What is ASMR?
ASMR stands for Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response. It's a non-scientific word that an everyday person came up with to describe the feeling characterized as a pleasurable tingling sensation felt in the head, scalp, back and other regions of the body in response to visual, auditory, tactile, olfactory, and/or cognitive stimuli, such as crinkling bags, hand movements, whispering, personal attention or watching someone perform a task. It's like goosebumps but much more pleasant and without the uncomfortable chills.
ASMR videos are meant to intentionally induce this sensation in the viewer, often referred to as "tingles", but the videos also serve to provide a relaxing, calming and soothing experience for the viewer. Many people who do not experience ASMR still enjoy the videos for their calming and sleepy effect.

[@user-qj2qh9ex2k]

"Are you human?" *sweating* "Next question"

[@Slinkycomet39]

"Do you have a soul?" *SWEATS PROFUSELY*

[@cheems016]

Well, answer.

[@LillieGoreXx]

@@cheems016 I'd rather not....°@-@

[@jordenstrother2227]

Ah sh*t he figured it out

[@LordChaosHavik]

Am a Ginger so I think it's a no to both.

[@dietcapriisun]

akinator: rift: *IM BOUT TO END THIS MANS WHOLE CAREER*

[@Nahman1234]

...

[@Patches_Gaming]

Rift: "Get back in your bottle!"

[@Kaledrone]

Your pfp makes this comment 10x better.

[@crazy_gamermcu1311]

Kaledrone /\ what about mine

[@lakiadler]

Thank you for this comment

[@gerrityoudell2444]

He’s not writing, but drawing the person that would answer yes to all these questions

[@poggestfrog323]

What about the person who said no to all these answers? That would be more interesting because they would not be a human

[@jodimills1279]

Aka himself

[@sygnetshorts]

He actually guessed right a lot about myself, including the name one with the number of vowels and constanants. Pretty crazy he guessed everything right about my name

[@wellhellothere5877]

@@poggestfrog323 neither would they have a soul

[@farithazri621]

Асмр

[@prytz5911]

im going to do everything he asked here so that when i come back to this video i can finally say yes to everything

[@asmurr3797]

Including cheat death out of 10 bucks

[@jilyyyyy.]

hmmmm the birthday one??

[@snipercat7838]

GOOD LUCK TO THAT BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO CHANGE THE 4TH LETTER OF YOUR LAST NAME TO Q!

[@doomerduck1346]

Send a tattoo pic

[@CornRaked]

@@snipercat7838 farquad

[@T_Boyd2122]

“When you were 12, did you steal a candy bar from your local convenience store” I plead the fifth

[@JohnLittle-gm8op]

Real story one time I was in the Dollar General open the bag of Gummy Worms sat in a corner and started eating them

[@luckydragon0538]

1

[@killerqueen6191]

I just turned 12 sooooo.....

[@gingerfever691]

1 2 3 FIIIF

[@diavolosteddy7594]

What does I plead the fifth mean

[@imafrog7666]

“Are you human” “I think this is getting a little personal”

[@husband-of-chinggis]

underrated comment

[@caoduyen9149]

He thinks aliens are real tho I’m joking

[@nokoanna5077]

Dont vory frog. I am somthing else to. Since my name in translasjon is somthing else.

[@LillieGoreXx]

Yeah I mean my species is obviously the waste of space type.

[@user-qk1oj3kz5h]

@@husband-of-chinggis stop

[@obsessivelyobsessed5263]

Imagine the person who actually had the poetry reading one, but they were like "AWWW mate... so close.... it's not a jellyfish... it's a squid.... but everything else is spot on!"

[@keenanlarsen1639]

If that person exists they should have it changed to a jellyfish

[@nofwild6325]

Man of war is technically not a jelly fish If I remember correctly

[@DarthSidian]

@@nofwild6325 Correct. It's a siphonophore.

[@murder070]

"Do you have a tatto on your left leg of a one legged victorian high back chair where sits a jellyfish reading poetry to a group of maline stalagmites which represents the ongoing struggle between parent and child as described in chapter 12 of her majestys decript of the inhabitents of the inner sanctum of the eternally finite thaumaltariums" that is the most oddly specific thing i have ever heard

[@jehehe76tcixi]

i have it on my right calf :/

[@Sharpened_stick]

Do you have a tattoo on your left leg of a one legged Victorian high back chair where sits a jelly fish reading a poetry to a group of maline stalagmites which represents the ongoing struggle between parent and child as described in chapter 12 of her majestys decript of the inhabitants of the inner sanctum of the eternally finite thaumaltariums?

[@pinkiefly6218]

@@Sharpened_stickyea

[@JustinBeaver-ne5gp]

How did he guess my exact tattoo the only 1 that I have Are you kidding me

[@mateienciu8847]

2:49 - My friend after I kill his Minecraft dog

[@xx_deadraccoon_xx8620]

LMFAOOOO🤣 that killed me

[@westongreen9062]

I giggled

[@neanderthal_]

Felt that

[@99ovrl]

I was drinking and then I had to quickly run to the sink to spit it out of laughter it got me laughing so hard!

[@amandamorris6655]

Lmaoo I-

[@syloboy163]

11:59 "when you were 12 years old, did you happen to steal a candy bar from the local convenience store?" "For legal reasons, my answer is no."

[@saturnfour]

me at 15 still stealing stuff in every store i go into: _next question-_

[@heartofonyx9763]

@@saturnfour hey, don’t do that, it hurts sales >:T (This is lighthearted btw)

[@saturnfour]

@@heartofonyx9763 i’m sorry 😓i need to stop 🧍

[@DoofXMachina]

@@saturnfour then... just stop

[@saturnfour]

@@DoofXMachina bye i’m trying

[@guerilla3633]

“Is metal your favorite music genre” Finally, some representation for me and my people

[@turt18]

Respect

[@loganmarshall983]

Our people*

[@monstersquid7205]

@@loganmarshall983 Liberty Prime: communism detected

[@akaaashiii1365]

*headbangs aggressively*

[@erikspeed8158]

They are not "your people"

[@Actualwendigo]

I like that when he asks questions like are you tired he doesn’t say what he writes as to let the answers be universal

[@songofsolomon5677]

“Is the fourth letter in your name q?” Me with three letters in my name: *yes*

[@mikeyyyv3640]

Susie Sheep I bet you 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 ur name is Mia

[@iLxnk0]

Mike Vaknansky or Ian

[@kao7ic13]

Are u joe?

[@yeetonmyfeet6548]

@@kao7ic13 wHo'S JoE?

[@Struxion]

@@yeetonmyfeet6548 *Inhales* JOE MAMMA

[@susgi2631]

“is the fourth letter in your name q?” *Lord Farquaad shifts uncomfortably*

[@taragroves9083]

this is the greatest comment of all time

[@IDKHonestly]

I'm dying.

[@Ast3r_0id]

Lmao

[@minethink1442]

legend

[@AngelVazquez-vs9xp]

The fourth letter of my surname is a q look at my username.

[@aidanaidan4773]

most people see these as questions, i see a bucket list.

[@autisticgooos]

A true pioneer of thought this man is

[@colemoore5007]

Ah yes, acquire social security number 0

[@cherri-sage]

@@colemoore5007 I will do what I must, no matter the cost!

[@aidanaidan4773]

@@colemoore5007 watch me pal

[@SplendidFellow]

Good luck with that tattoo I bet it'll be interesting

[@purple02.]

Plot twist: he's trying to find out our social security number but he's asking other questions so we don't find out

[@QuickFlixDae]

"Are you human?" *Zuckerberg sips water intensely*

[@davidclout6286]

I was about to comment this.

[@ghost-pj9tm]

Really I was thinking inhales water but that works too lol

[@Jimmiesmom]

SHIT THARE ON TO ME

[@generalraven9804]

Don’t you mean zucc juice?

[@Demon_SXZ]

@@davidclout6286 to late

[@jchau_]

Rift: do you have a soul? Me, a university student: I used to

[@notaveragecr6041]

Me a male nurse: I used to... *cries in endless work and risk of virus*

[@BeanKatz]

@@notaveragecr6041 I salute you, you brave soilders

[@havynandabby]

We all used too

[@jonathan6703]

“When you were 12 yrs old did u steal a candy bar from a local convenience store?” My lawyer informs me to remain silent.

[@mariomorales898]

I just wanna see what the papers look like when he's done with these type of videos. I wanna know whether he just scribbles or actually writes stuff down.

[@armin4298]

Oh i think you should go watch the "you are ephemeral rift ASMR" it shows the clipboard and the paper and I'm not gonna spoil it just watch the video. Or i can tell you if you don't feel like it.

[@dis__aster]

@@armin4298 could you tell me though?

[@dis__aster]

@@armin4298 also nice username here

[@hellsraiser8743]

He's writing "I'm paid for this wow"

[@RandomEphemeral]

its scribbles

[@thepizzatime3502]

“Are you human?” “No this is Patrick”

[@DreadFullllll]

Lol

[@purplegirltoh]

This comment is so underrated

[@DreadFullllll]

@@purplegirltoh facts

[@Obama3ryk]

Man I think this is the most creative comment out there

[@Obama3ryk]

@@thepizzatime3502 it is not, srsly so many stupid comments I see over and over again on other videos

[@Struxion]

If you answered yes to any of the questions, you may be entitled to financial compensation.

[@LoserSnoozer]

pay up

[@MelMelMel]

So... all honest humans? Its often the dishonest ppl who are at the financial top.

[@cat-jv2yt]

TheFatalFreak this is so weird, you might find this weird but I have been here before and seen this comment, I don’t remember it but I do, it’s more than just déjà vu. I don’t know what is going on but I am extremely confused right now.

[@endermage77]

Financial compensation for answering yes to any of the questions? Well darnit

[@kxmode]

Open your window and yell, "It's my money and I need it now!"

[@asianhero1034]

his voice is so clear even when whispering 😳

[@laurelsartin146]

"Have you ever cheated death-" Yes. "-out of $10‽" What? N-well..no Took me for a loop

[@PINE_333]

He’s writing “I can’t believe I get paid for this shit” over and over again

[@slickryder]

that was a good joke i actually laughed at that :)

[@aquivan2564]

I don’t think he does but if so, that’s absolutely hilarious and I can relate.

[@themidnightview7943]

Lol i know right

[@haydenborowy5749]

I desperately want that to be true

[@bethbragancia955]

I’m in control of the 666, at the current moment.

[@joshuakilpatrick7824]

"Are you an intellectual?" *Everyone:* *Me, an intellectual:* "Yes."

[@e.6z1]

take my like and get this dad joke outta here!

[@focalpoint._]

No no, it’s all wrong. You should say “I am very greatful of your act of asking if i, the person you are asking, is a person who is a more intelligent individual than most average persons. To answer that very good question indeed, my good acquaintance is that i am the type of person who will say... Of course.”

[@randomspartanhoe4501]

r/technicallytruth

[@mataco7073]

@Sandosam ??? 5

[@spicedmoonlight7703]

here go ahead and have 666 likes-

[@dubloomcarried552]

Some of these questions feel more like a psychic evaluation. "do you have an obsession with fire" well, that depends on what you're gonna do with that information, doc

[@commando_barrage501]

“Can you run fast enough to get away from the police.” Me: Depends

[@alessandroboscheri7654]

"Are you human" *KZbin algorithm starts sweating*

[@SamiTheCreativeGenius]

@@darksu_yt3976 self promoting is only gonna drag your channel down.

[@tamimyaseen6013]

@@darksu_yt3976 no offense but self promoting is stupid and makes thehings worse

[@ImJustDani]

BMC_DarkSu_ YT imagine being a fortnite channel that leeches off of other peoples videos asking for subscribers lmao.

[@alessandroboscheri7654]

@@ImJustDani Sorry to break it to you but I never played Fortnite in general

[@ImJustDani]

Killer The Chiller sorry to break it to you but that was directed to the other guy promoting as well as all the other messages.

[@florian05b]

"Are you human?" Nah im American

[@yungpihov6610]

"Are you human?" No I'm Russian

[@clumsiiconfidant5780]

“Are you human?” “No I’m a lesbian.” “I thought you were American?”

[@spadedonkey7917]

@• arothetic: the first thing I thought of when I saw this comment is this

[@aiim_aimm]

„Are you human?“ no Im german

[@charlieprice7908]

"Are you human?" I am English, yes

[@jpnkrtn]

You actually guessed my least favorite letter and I am really proud of both of us for that

[@umayana28]

Him: Do you live in a warm climate? Me, melting in 40°C: NoPe

[@breadlord6698]

No, you live in an oven

[@Otter855]

My man 🤝

[@kierancooper404]

When he said, "do u have a soul" Me a ginger: no?

[@tonydematteo6841]

Stolen

[@gamine7807]

Stole en

[@alli.zimmerman0644]

same

[@parentedivino5466]

Noice

[@kakary3161]

As a fellow ginger, my answer is a few too many

[@faustsiftar7683]

Imagine Rift just guessing your phone number and address when you are about to fall asleep

[@majintorabisu6633]

Duuuuude lol I'd freak out and look out my bedroom window

[@TYZ.AUTOMOTIVE]

😂😂

[@snipa2408]

your social security number and everything 🤣

[@ranch418]

Just calmly like: 1273....

[@1996Pinocchio]

hilarious

[@mothmitchell7774]

I come back to this video because the way he describes his actions as he does them when he asks “do you like this sound”, like saying that he is putting his clipboard down and leaving the pen open and all that makes me feel safe in a way

[@user-tp9bk6jq8z]

"Do you have a tattoo on your left leg of a one legged victorian high back chair where sits a jellyfish reading poetry to a group of maline stalagmites which represents the ongoing struggle between parent and child as described in chapter 12 of her majestys decript of the inhabitents of the inner sanctum of the eternally finite thaumaltariums" *me sweating* uh......yes

[@ouchiegiverjr]

Plot twist: He was looking in a mirror, this was a self motivating video.

[@turkishmantelope583]

Every thing is actually just about him

[@pandanina]

Looolll this needs more views

[@jule111181]

Its true

[@crunchybroll4731]

That would be creepy as hell

[@generalkenobilegoproductio5488]

So...is he Ephqmeral Rift of Ephemeral Rifq?

[@tristanmcguire4820]

I have the weird feeling his questions are really facts about himself

[@delorean1278]

I'd like to see his tattoo then

[@ericisvalid3298]

Same

[@Chloe-ml9rp]

Same

[@sen6240]

Same

[@landon.8598]

Same

[@dragonboss274]

He seems so into it and joyful and it awesome and he came up with so many questions it’s amazing and his hairstyle is actually pretty damn cool

[@portcitypersona]

I am so alone and lonely and in despair with depression. I just started trying out various ASMR's and I typed ASNR conversations because I need so bad to feel like someone cares. Thank you I enjoy this and subbed to your channel. I also enjoy the lightheartedness too. Though I cried but that's just me.

[@thegotdamnuhtheuhhh]

Hope you are doing well man, don't give up

[@squirrel9301]

him: can you run fast enough to get away from the police me, in my wheelchair:

[@connorfields1809]

You could ride fast enough😂

[@Businessgoose123]

If you go down a hill then yeah

[@asquirrel7757]

Bro u needa get one of em formula 1 wheelchairs the police scrubs will never catch up, godspeed, literally

[@insertrandomusernamhere4209]

@Adolf Hitler donate him a panther :)

[@pancakes8816]

Question, how do you slow down when going down a hill? Or like if you accidently pick up a shit ton of speed, how would you stop?

[@WhatAmIDoing1818]

"are you ready" "Man I hope these get easier" "Are you comfertable" "Come on give me an easier one" "Are you tired" "Now that better be retorical why else am I here" "Are you human" "Oh come on back to the impossible ones"

[@NicotineNicksVapeshop]

The tattoo was wild

[@StaticSpark314]

Imagine the one person in the world who he got everything right about finding this video and freaking out

[@Marwan_og]

Mathematically speaking it is a very very slim chance, actually almost impossible for anyone in the world itself to get all questions correct

[@Brae182]

@@Marwan_og cool

[@kileywinkler5368]

Marwan Mahmoud wow that’s so cool but i don’t remember asking...

[@thatsprucedude5027]

@Marwan Mahmoud sounds like someone whos freaking out coz he got it all right would say

[@lazershots4359]

@@Marwan_og I have a feeling you're 14 and you think you're the smartest person in the universe

[@mmewri]

"Are you human?" Jesus Christ: well yes but actually no

[@defusion5536]

Yesn’t

[@travismccutchan3144]

Wholesome

[@boopsboops7692]

Who would you actually want to be a human?

[@doommageddon]

@@boopsboops7692 Humans

[@boyhudman2997]

This is a perfect time to stop liking the comment

[@Ray-dl5mp]

One of the best asmr videos ever. This and #2. There is something so calming about this structure.

[@BoneJuices]

3:22 How’d you know? Man this guy is good!

[@subscribersWithoutavideo-jy8uf]

*looks at my Dog named Horse* Me: We’re leaving..

[@ishrimpfortheshark7428]

I would like your comment but it has 69 likes so I am going to leave at that

[@ishrimpfortheshark7428]

@Riley Reyes how do you know who told you, Cause your right.

[@Tom-vu1wr]

@@ishrimpfortheshark7428 420 likes from me. I hope this makes up for that

[@Azzad379]

@Riley Reyes 78 dollars that's so specific wth

[@user-sc8mj5bb6k]

Think about it, in some universe, there is is probably some guy that relates to every single one of his questions and he is just staring creeped out on his screen.

[@pussyrestorer4370]

In some alternate universe some guy is nervously holding a gun, shaking while looking out his window

[@Cintivii]

But someone cant be born in January and September at the same time

[@Sphagetti__]

@@Cintivii In some universe this is possible

[@toyamonee753]

Did u just assume the gender?!!?? XD

[@lukacrnomarkovic8172]

I dont relate to any

[@tacosauce6234]

time to go get that tattoo specifically

[@cUnTTlol]

This is actualy the only asmr video that puts me to sleep anymore.

[@michaelpaladino2158]

Him: "Are you human" Me: *short circuits and explodes*

[@awsomer76]

Michael Paladino I genuinely am not

[@thomasnolastname8734]

Mark Zuckerberg: *sips water*

[@deffdefying4803]

Awsomer 76 What are you then?

[@aldoestebanrailefvillanuev5852]

Michael Paladino get this man to *666* likes now

[@axellea1592]

I'm a toast ._________.

[@JaykuhbYT]

"Do you have a tattoo, on your left calf, of a one legged victorian high back chair in which sits a... Jellyfish... Which represents the struggle..." This question only goes on for about a paragraph, which must R E A L L Y freak out the one person in the world that may have it... Just think...

[@asas14444]

or may not have it?

[@northernmostrat]

....man 'o' war jellyfish * Reading poetry to a group of maligned stalagmites. Which represents the ongoing struggle in between parent and child as described in chapter twelve of her majesty's decree * to the inhabitants of the inner-sanctum * of the eternally finite thamultarians.

[@miyokotheh0e535]

Funny story This girl that went to my camps dad had a tattoo like this and I asked him what was it and he gave this exact description so that creeped me out

[@JaykuhbYT]

@@northernmostrat thanks for finishing lol

[@sydneybrooks6038]

Shy_foxx_gaming damn

[@Alexx_the_coolest]

The “is metal your favorite music genre?” That actually scared me cause I assumed he was gonna use pop or country or maybe even rap as that but if he said death metal or nu metal I would’ve fr been so creeped out cause I love both of those genres 😭😭

[@ethanol1mufc]

My name is walter hartwell white

[@alexanderpfeiffer9817]

Him: Do you have a pet dog named horse? Me: No but I have a pet horse named dog.

[@pigeondercringelord5053]

I Have Dog called Parallelogramm

[@finnii1022]

No joke, my friend has a goat named dog.

[@noobtooby]

Chill dude, you gonna break the matrix...

[@Raven-Marie25]

My friend has a horse named cat

[@reaperkill2255]

My dogs name is Riley

[@jasminm9971]

“Is metal your favorite music genre?” *headbangs aggressively*

[@PotartOnYT]

Yes.

[@Plazali]

Uh... Technically, nah

[@MrKirbo-ho4bj]

Yes

[@papasins8896]

hiqxen yes

[@coconutmilk2664]

hiqxen i thought this said mental at first

[@vampy5071]

Erm actually.. 8:44 this really is my favourite colour 👀 Always was my fav, i painted my bedroom this colour and put black vinyls up of crows flying and a tree with leaves blowing across the side of my wall

[@Just_Another_Femboy]

People probably think you're having a stroke when you say it

[@CelticLove98]

“Are you human?” “Negative. I am a meat popsicle.”

[@cara_melly]

“Do you have a slight limp in your right leg because you were struck by a tree?” **VIETNAM FLASHBACKS**

[@doodboi7106]

**FORTUNE SON PLAYS IN THE BACKGROUND INCESSANTLY**

[@IsabruhMoment]

THE TREE WAS ASKING FOR IT

[@skullman728]

CHARLIE IN THE TREES

[@thomasnolastname8734]

WAR *WAR NEVER CHANGES*

[@kartoffel112]

I hear the Hueys They are going to save us But f*** no there is a Grind

[@Caucasian_sensation17]

What I kinda wish happened "Do you like this sound" * Screams *

[@haztetv7226]

Logan Broxson laying beneth my covers, and kek’d at this comment, thank you

[@adrianshilling1878]

And you have you head set all the way up lol

[@Newgodofwar]

RIP headphone users.

[@dylanmcfiggins5816]

i want that to happen in a ASMR video. just in the middle of the video they scream just out of nowhere. Just stilling there relaxing. and then... ( *SCREAMS* ) :-P

[@UniverseCorn]

Hazte TV im literally doing the same thing

[@nameless.greyceo]

This is my favorite please do more of this question ones, wish every asmr did this

[@nao.p.e3247]

Every question he asked: FIRST SET OF QUESTIONS Are you ready? Are you comfortable? Are you tired? Are you human? Do you have a soul? Is metal your favorite music genre? Do you have a tattoo on your left calf of a one leged Victorian high back chair in which sits a man a war jellyfish reading poetry to a group of maline stalagmites which represents the on going struggle between parent and child as described in chapter 12 of her majestys decree to the inhabitants of the inner sanctum of the eternaly fine knight thowelltarians? Did you eat a carrot today but without peeling it? Is the first digit of your national identification number which is your social security number your identity number etc. the number zero? Did you ever download any Metallica songs using Napster? Is the fourth letter in your surname the letter Q? Do you like this sound? (Raffia yarn?) Do you happen to live on a street named street road? Is your favorite color quinacridone magenta? (you won't be graded on this don't worry) Can you play the violin? Were you born in the month of September? Would you consider yourself a philosopher? Do you have precisely $43.07? When you were 12 years old did you happen to steal a candy bar from the local convenient store? Do you wear a 7 and a half size shoe? Do you happen to live in an abode made of clay? Have you completed chapter 3 of your manifesto but you're not quite sure what to write for chapter 4 so you decided to take a break and are now resuming chapter 8 of your memuars? Do you own a pet dog named horse? Is your least favorite smell the smell of mayonnaise? Is the third letter of your first name the letter I? Have you ever cheated death out of more than $10? Are you a card carrying member of the tin foil society? Do you call earth your home? Do you own two pairs of sneakers, one pair of dress shoes, and a complete collection of Breaking Bad series on a DVD or Blu-ray? Can you run fast enough to get away from the police? Have you recently given up, giving up and focused more on giving in? Do you live in a warm climate? Is the sixth digit of your national identification number again, that's your identity number, social security number etc. the number 7? Is your favorite number 39,074,211.8004435⁸? Do you bite, pick, and/or peel your fingernails? That's going to complete the first part of the questions SECOND SET OF QUESTIONS Do you have irrational fear of one day not having any milk in your refrigerator to go with your cookies? Are you a die hard Marvel fan but you secretly watch and read DC unbeknownst to those in your inner circle who would throw you into a pit of malnourished rabbid goats should they ever find out? Are there a total of 9 continents and 5 vowels in your full name Do you wish your name had more continents than vowels? Is your favorite hard candy butterscotch? Do you own 2 belts, one is black and the other is brown? Do you have a pet Katherine named parallelogram? Do you walk with a slight limp in your right leg ever since you were struck by a tree? Is your least favorite letter the letter R? Is the fith digit of your phone number the number 2? Do you like this sound? (Black Shoe 👞) Were you born on a Monday at 2:03pm? Are you an intellectual? Is your favorite flavor cake? Did you your breakfast this morning consist of one egg over easy, two slices of Canadian bacon, and then you had one slice of toast and the bread was whole wheat, and then you had on that slice of toasted whole wheat bread you had blueberry preserves, and then to drink you had a small glass of orange juice but without the pulp because you don't like all that pulp, is that what you had for breakfast this morning? Is your least favorite number the number 479,289.8133026³? Do you still have high hopes and dreams and aspirations of becoming the world's greatest relaxer? Can you play the kazoo? Are you allergic to the sound of eyes blinking? Do you enjoy hiking and walking in nature cause you need to get away from society and people only to regret having to go back to society having to deal with people all over again? Is your other favorite letter of the alphabet the letter G? Were you stung by a bee on August 23rd 1994 at ballpark 9:48am? Is the eighth character of your secondary email addres the letter H? Is the sixth character in your primary email address the ampersand? Do you have a healthy obsession with fire? Do you truly enjoy talking on the phone? In your refrigerator on the second shelf on the right side somewhat towards the middle of the shelf, is there a half eaten cheese steak ham sandwich Ruben? Do you wish you were living in the midevil period and you were a renowned archer who was heralded throughout all the kingdoms and you were on a quest to avenge your mother's death, you prefer to travel alone, from time to time you will go to the aid of those in need for a few coins, you prefer traveling on foot, and the name of your bow is emerald? ‼️LAST SET OF QUESTIONS IN COMMENTS‼️

[@killerqueenbitethedust1547]

oh

[@r.k2482]

Pure dedication right here

[@kasuki800]

More guesses! THIRD SERIES OF GUESSES: Do you live north of the equator? Is the day you were born the 30th? Do you still regret, to this very day right now, refusing to play the chello in your sophomore year at high school? Are you fluent in 18 different languages, including American? Is the last letter in your first name a vowel? Is the first letter in your last name a consinant? Do you feel so much better now you left all forms of social media about a year ago? Is your least favorite thing to do your most favorite thing to do? Is the fourth digit of your national identification number the number 12? Do you hate gravity more than pain? Is the last digit of your phone number the number 1? Would you say you are pretty good at throwing a frisbee? Do yyou swallow your gum after you finish chewing it? Were you born in the month of January? Do you like this sound? (The c h i c k e n) Do you enjoy being a pedestrian? Did you not enjoy these series of questions and guesses? Fin

[@Just_Another_Femboy]

Thats... Extremely impressive

[@Sharpened_stick]

Do you have a tattoo on your left calf of a one legged Victorian high back chair where sits a man a jelly fish reading a poetry to a group of maline stalagmites which represents the ongoing struggle between parent and child as described in chapter 12 of her majestys decree to the inner sanctum of the eternally finite thowelltarians

[@sensitivebb3592]

Rift: “it’s completely confidential” everyone in the comments: *let’s share answers*

[@barkside3012]

you are dumb.

[@sensitivebb3592]

@@barkside3012 It’s clearly satire, I didn’t ask for your comment 🤗

[@asher.222]

Barkside bro u ok there-

[@benguin5522]

@@barkside3012 you good man

[@twistedanna9441]

@@barkside3012 who hurt you :|

[@khostie]

“Are you human?” No, I’m a drawing on a sticky note named montee

[@benjammin5328]

Lol XD

[@aurin_komak]

That's a good comment I like it

[@sourpatchgirl4479]

Lol

[@corbanoT.V.]

I'm a World Serpent

[@corbanoT.V.]

@@iamkrazy19 but I thought you were Krazy

[@medicodyssey]

"is the fourth letter in your name Q" I paused. Luckily the third letter in my name is Q, but for a moment there I was a bit freaked out lol

[@refinedbandwagon160]

man these make me smile so much

[@taragroves9083]

him: "is your favourite colour quinacridone magenta" me, an intellectual: "I like blue"

[@gropuco9866]

🤓

[@theathiestpriest]

😎

[@shyguy7265]

I'm more basic with dark purple as my favorite

[@PrincessTrunksBriefs]

It is not blie though.

[@taragroves9083]

@@PrincessTrunksBriefs doesn't matter either way, the joke is still funny

[@jankohout2856]

"Were you born on Monday?" Yeah... Just coincidence probably "In the afternoon?" Yeah... Wtf man... "At 2 pm?" I'm moving some place safe rift got me...

[@UltimateDudeGuy]

Jan Kohout no escape

[@diogoc1541]

@@UltimateDudeGuy no russian

[@UltimateDudeGuy]

@@diogoc1541 ?

[@joshuagraham5750]

Diogo c *Loads Machine Gun with malicious intent*

[@diogoc1541]

@@UltimateDudeGuy it's a call of duty reference

[@thatguyd5288]

it would have been hilarious if he just ate the clip board. i would cry in laughter

[@thatguyd5288]

Please do it at least bite it lol

[@Noperison]

Lol

[@AshtonLemonade]

i literally jolted awake when i heard “is metal your favourite music genre”

[@abyss9171]

“Do you have a soul?” Me, a ginger: “Well no sir, I don’t believe so”

[@masongeiger3075]

U do since u stole it

[@catherinemartin1957]

Lmao fellow ginger I agree

[@v4mpire.culture]

I don't get the joke gingers dont have souls? I'm not a ginger and I dont have a soul?

[@domada8738]

@@v4mpire.culture Search for "gingers do have souls" it's an old meme

[@hysterical8537]

holy shit this reminds me of that one episode of southpark lmaoo😂😂

[@nightshine_]

"Are you ready?" "No." "**writes down** They are ready."

[@floweringgoatboy2389]

He wasn't wrong, you were.

[@bluedb4878]

In all honesty this is a good video, a lot of this guys videos are great and I’d recommend him to a lot of friends who struggle with sleep and who like roleplay stuff, although I feel it would be better if he was Typing our “responses” on a keyboard or computer rather than writing them down, yes the writing is Pleasing, but IMO nothin beats keyboard taps

[@EphemeralRift]

Duly noted. Next time I do this I’ll use a keyboard! I don’t use it enough as it is. Have a splentastic now!

[@aptrock327]

It's about that one time where he does get something right and you smile from ear to ear!

[@justingonzales1820]

"Do you have a soul?" *Gingers start sweating profusely*

[@dillonwiley9530]

Shit I’m caught

[@lucbrisebois767]

That or the synthetic space Jews

[@thomasmathias1667]

@@lucbrisebois767 or robot space pirates, whatever go fuck yourself

[@vioricadragos5354]

Oh my soul îs gone for a long time... now it's just a deep void

[@astro7884]

I’m a fellow ginger but find this funny 😂😂

[@salomedl]

“does your full name have 14 letters total?” me: *sweats in latinamerican*

[@ashenamber2305]

hey at least it isnt a dumb name

[@rileyd07]

@Barry Mcockiner she meant her real name is long because she is Latin American

[@evilturtle6767]

(Conner from cyberlife) 28 LETTERS IN YOUR NAME

[@flick8413]

cries in 25 letters

[@brenteeckhoudt4187]

14 here

[@upcidown]

This video just came up on my YT start page. I never saw you before, but you're amazing. Subbed!

[@Firehawk63]

You need to do more shoe tapping it was HEAVENLY😩😩😩😩😩😩😩

[@jamesrollison1599]

"can you play the violin?" *Well, I beat the devil once*

[@adelaide2890]

James Rollison *Steve Rogers voice* I understood that reference!

[@dannyboy6132]

Heard about that were was it Georgia I think?

[@brandonfield3993]

He literally asked that right as I was reading your comment. That was weird haha 😂

[@enuskosinua2133]

Dont wanna anger anyone or sound like an idiot or anything.. but could anyone explain me this thing? Just intrested :p

[@cmae6]

Dolppi fry from futurama beat the devil with his own hands in one of the episodes to win back Lila

[@Scrffy]

Him: are you tired Me: *hasn't slept in 23 hours* No I'm fine

[@yellowivy5846]

Subscribe to me for no reason Pshhhh,weakling!Ive pulled 3 all nighters in a row!

[@Tewemeh2ter]

Yellow Ivy *dumbass sarcastic smiley voice* That’s fatal.

[@xxpeachflowerxx4423]

Want me to call jesus to help you sleep

[@SemihG22]

Just 23? Pathetic

[@thomasnolastname8734]

What is sleep?

[@Eric391]

Uncle Rift: "Are you human?" Mark Zuckerberg: " I know that becouse I was human[em] I am human ehe"

[@gnomeboi3718]

I’m genuinely thinking about getting that tattoo

[@tuskwilliams716]

D o N o t

[@goodguybjorn]

Do It. Also, get this guy 69 likes. He needs it. 420 even better.

[@Seven-lt6yi]

I will not like this I respect whatevs gaming and refuse to like this comment

[@sylasgarrett5364]

Jack Williams why not

[@nectarkenni]

Samee

[@rosmostdedicatedsoldier3187]

“Can you run fast enough to run away from the police” “Well shit i did when I was 12”

[@catherinemartin1957]

THE ULTIMATE REWARD A LIKE FROM GOD HIMSELF

[@chance_ondriezek99]

3:20 You know someone got that tattoo after hearing this

[@user-up8jx3mt6j]

This guy always made me so sleepy.

[@CV20K]

“Are you human?” *he’s onto me*

[@toeragtoerag]

R u n

[@alexissinclair]

We gotta run or in my case fly!

[@DRGONDO]

or in my case just cry

[@alexissinclair]

@@DRGONDO no pls dont cry its ok come with me and we can watch some sponge bob

[@thegrimneereaper6715]

@@alexissinclair i know you weren't talking to me, but I'm down if you got some extra room

[@kendrajohnson4006]

“Did you eat a carrot today without peeling it?” Why...would I peel it? “Okay.”

[@minethink1442]

Peeling a carrot is completely normal bro

[@death.9297]

Minethink 144 is it? XD

[@minethink1442]

@@death.9297 it's to clean them, carrots are grown in the ground, the ground is dirty.

[@bambino9235]

Minethink 144 i don’t peel my skin off when it’s dirty, i just wash it. See no reason the same can’t apply to carrots

[@sakus2866]

I peel carrots every time beafore I eat them

[@rikingg5629]

for the people worrying that this might be an actual preson, there's no way that the 4th digit of something is a 2 digit number

[@elwiwi4638]

1 7 8 23 9 3

[@-kaigaku-8548]

this is soo smoothing

[@misslyntheena]

Imagine being able to answer „yes“ to the tattoo question.

[@JimmyCreekyCrawfish]

It will become so in time.

[@jimmithy7570]

I feel bad for you all. He guessed it for me.

[@chloe-roll]

I'll be able to answer yes in 2 years

[@mae3973]

Me too.

[@sukunaryomen121]

Someone will get it

[@miszclz]

"Are you feeling tired?" Everyone at 3 am trying to sleep Yeaghh

[@spadedonkey7917]

Currently 2:52 AM for me

[@staircatz]

1:30am for meh

[@user-mc2tj2fy8b]

Make it 5:18 am...

[@munktard7772]

9:11

[@lumikkiharthri6658]

5:01 am

[@erika-rs3ns]

why does this man make me feel so safe? i would let him hold my drink at a party

[@ayanmandal7470]

I just randomly skipped to 10 minutes & he guessed my birth month 😵‍💫

[@danielgallo5634]

“Are you human?” Me: Nah I’m Gay My sister: I thought you were American

[@SantiagoHidalgo-ow9wb]

Nice reference to the vine

[@xXRusky_SevmorXx]

HAHA... hahh... hmm...

[@goodgollyitsholly]

"Hey, I'm a lesbian." "I tHoUgHt YoU wErE aMeRiCaN???"

[@AbsoluteAbsurd]

Ha

[@themidnightview7943]

Ummmm... Hi.........

[@lucie5117]

"Do you have a tattoo on your left calf of a one-legged Victorian high back chair in which sits a Men O' War jellyfish reading poetry to a group of maligned stalagmites which represents the ongoing struggle between parent and child as described in chapter 12 of her majesty's decree to the inhabitants of the intersanctum of the eternally finight thameltarians?" **HOW DID YOU KNOW?**

[@AcidRiotGaming]

Tripped up on "finite" hehe

[@LordZipThe3rd]

I KNOW RIGHT!!

[@pepsinotthedrink]

I'm actually amazing how you didn't edit this but instead just memorised it instead

[@LotFrat]

@@pepsinotthedrink or maybe he did that on a PC

[@frankastisk]

I was like "Omg I have two!!"

[@thecrustyone1503]

I am gradually becoming inspired to somehow do everything I can to relate to all of these questions and it scares me

[@myrylth]

a lot of these were more accurate than i expected

[@darknight9886]

"Do you swallow your gum after you finish chewing it" I heard something a little different

[@pandanina]

stop-

[@hotdogseven9589]

Why chew?!?!

[@addisonmendez3160]

vicky robins you gotta break it down so your stomach can digest it. or have I been doing it wrong?

[@clumsiiconfidant5780]

*cough* ¢Um-

[@addisonmendez3160]

YourPrettyBitchin! OfficialTM shhhh just go with the joke

[@juanic7947]

“Are you human?” “I must speak with my lawyer first to answer this question”

[@dr.doctor9123]

"I invoke the fifth 🤚" -Law by Mike

[@elliotrex9167]

Hi I'm Saul Goodman, did you know that you have rights?

[@blagoevski336]

@@elliotrex9167 constitution says you do

[@greativity0]

@@blagoevski336 And so do i

[@blagoevski336]

@@greativity0 yup