As a very hurt person, who built MANY MANY walls and recently discover that I have CPTSD and started to resolve it, I am totally resonating and knowing what you are talking about. I am literally experiencing my natural "defense" mechanism coming back on board, so I don't need (so many) walls any more.
@samanthafrancis53047 күн бұрын
That’s not boundaries- boundaries are internal and are for us not others. Walls and boundaries are two different things. Boundaries and doing emotional work that addresses pain can work in tandem.
@MelW6697 күн бұрын
I don’t think you understand what a boundary is. 🤦♀️
@SkillsToChange7 күн бұрын
@@MelW669 oh I do!
@MelW6697 күн бұрын
@@SkillsToChangeI heard you describing a wall. In my mind those are two different things. 🙏
@SkillsToChange7 күн бұрын
@ the boundary is a line or a wall drawn
@burnttoast54776 күн бұрын
@@SkillsToChange They do the same thing for different reasons. Walls are for protecting vulnerabilities, boundaries are to protect you from being taken advantage of (self-respect basically). Walls might be needed to prevent others from belittling your vulnerabilities. Boundaries might include, if a family member randomly asks you to help cook pie with them, but you've had an activity planned with friends for a month now, prioritizing the activity that was planned in advance. Essentially staying reliable, not letting chaos interrupt your schedule. - In this case it doesn't matter whether it's family or friends asking you to cancel your schedule. What matters is being reliable to those around you. Boundaries can also be - Not paying for the entire friend group at a club. - Or (if you have a busy life) needing friends to plan group activities days in advance. Once the healing is done, walls can go away without consequence. Boundaries can change, but should never go away completely.