Family Guy - Never Have I...

Never have I ever, Family Guy style

[@RudeRabit]

I like how it went from “never have I ever” to “let’s just name impossible things so Quagmire doesn’t take another shot”

[@whyme3772]

“I’ve never banged an aboriginal woman while strumming the national anthem on a Beetle’s signed guitar” Quag: “GODDAMN”

[@Pharoax]

And he still ends up drinking

[@Pharoax]

@@MrV41N how

[@lickmyloafbruh]

@@MrV41NHe was just pointing something out asshole

[@paoerfulone1089]

Let me try! Never have I ever… had anal w/ Greek chick behind a pyramid while getting my ears pulled by an orangutan the middle of an archeology exhibit.

[@chrisgeorge2035]

I was never born 9 times Quagmire: Oh come on

[@moneylover318]

I never banged a meatloaf

[@cedricmartin8797]

@@moneylover318 Quagmire' Oh come on! Me: Never slept with my parents

[@AtlanticCoastJoey]

I've never kissed a video game girl Quagmire: OH CMON!

[@jaredsaldana1599]

I never did it with a transvestite Quagmire:YOU SON OF A BITCH!!

[@loganweaver8251]

I was never in a bisexual orgy Quagmire: OH COME ON!!!!!!

[@Chirpysemperboy]

it is funny how it went from "Never Have I Ever..." to "Let's see how deep this rabbit hole goes?"

[@fennex7575]

You should have worded it better

[@paper2941]

*Giggity*

[@Paper_Brain]

that's what it always turns into

[@chrismartin583]

@@paper2941 damn you you almost made shit pants

[@BIoknight000]

Like that one episode of Mr. Show with the lie detector

[@Robopercy]

“I never slept with Cleveland’s wife” **Cleveland and Quagmire take a shot**

[@gaymerjerry]

Which wife did Quagmire sleep with though Donna or Loretta

[@IsaSaien]

@@gaymerjerry yes

[@bestshootingbigingrimey6501]

@@gaymerjerry Loretta

[@San-cs6lk]

hahahaha omg that's so funny, I didn't see that on the video!!

[@villek.1145]

@@San-cs6lk ikr!! xd

[@CoolPandaTheMovieNerd]

I wonder what Quagmire's bucket list is currently.

[@rhettdilley]

Rick Sanchez sounds pretty spot on

[@conntoons_4848]

Rick Sanchez lmao

[@killianmmmoore]

Hed never slept with someone transgender (at that point)(knowingly)

[@Backyardmech1]

Killian Moore Brian did let him know about that after a flight to Thailand when he sniffed him down as a BCP sniffing dog. Quagmire thought he was with 3 chicks but Brian sniffed out 2.

[@CoolPandaTheMovieNerd]

@@killianmmmoore he bangs his own dad because of his mentally insane girlfriend.

[@danielmccafferty5373]

Is it a possibility that Quagmire eventually got so drunk that he's just assuming he's done these things?

[@muffinchip6894]

It's quagmire...

[@forge4119]

Its possible. But not very probable

[@Eye_Of_Odin978]

This being Quagmire we're talking about, it's very likely he remembered those things VIVIDLY, unfortunately. Ya can't run from your giving a spider monkey a reacharound demon forever, no matter how much booze you drink lol

[@doubleslothgaming]

@@muffinchip6894 who else but Quagmire

[@mere8320]

The chances are low but never zero

[@gunnermoomo2080]

Quagmire drank 37 beers, and at 15 seconds for the first three questions and hypothetically 6 "sips" per bottle he drank to 222 wacky things in 18.5 minutes (can't fine his weight so I just guessed 140) meaning he has a blood alcohol level of 1.36 which is nearly 4 times the lethal limit

[@OverHeed]

YEAH SCIENCE!

[@mrfahrenheit3773]

U got a lot of time on your hands huh 🤣

[@typacsk]

They did the math! *They did the monster math...*

[@connormclernon26]

Wouldn’t this depend on the alcohol content of Pawtucket Patriot?

[@user-qz3hb9kk5u]

-🤓

[@joeywomer]

Me: "I never did a chick in the cockpit of my airplane with the radio turned on for people to hear me." Glenn: "Oh god, this is ridiculous!"

[@FuryanJedi13]

It wouldn't surprise me if that actually happened to Quagmire.

[@J221.]

@@FuryanJedi13 while I feel like he would do that I think his love for being a pilot and being professional about would cause him not to do that

[@morganrussman]

@@FuryanJedi13 considering that quagmires a airplane pilot and of how many women there sometimes are on his flights, that wouldn't be that much of a surprise if that did happen at least once.

[@DgardsGaming]

@@J221. No i doubt it, i think he would of

[@masterfarr8265]

I never did a guy behind the dumpster at Cleveland's deli

[@Dragon66898]

I love how Peter quickly glanced at Quagmire with the reach around one.

[@LarrytheKing16]

He probably knew Quagmire was gonna drink.

[@noneofyourbuisness1679]

I get the feeling that, as soon as he said it out loud - even before he finished saying it - he knew Quagmire would drink. Because who else but Quagmire?

[@kingpen5866]

I love how you made a basic observation

[@minkkstarr]

The Joke

[@minkkstarr]

That was apart of the Joke

[@dominicanthony9887]

Joe: I’ve never slept with Lois Quagmire: Oh come on! Peter: Wait what?

[@314rft]

Honestly Peter probably wouldn't be surprised. Both because Quagmire, and because Lois is apparently the hornier of the griffin couple.

[@tiaaaron3278]

The timetravel episode implied Lois and Quagmire had a thing going on before Peter made his move.

[@marckempe2143]

@@tiaaaron3278 time travel episode only implied that it only happened AFTER Peter went back the first time to make up for what he perceived as lost time, but actually ended up pushing Lois away, which is strange because Peter met Quagmire and Cleveland because of Carter this was after Quagmire was enlisted in the Navy.

[@tiaaaron3278]

@@marckempe2143 There are clearly multiple timelines in Family Guy lol.

[@hummingbirdgirl0720]

I never did all the princesses in Disneyland or Disney World with Mickey Mouse watching... "Seriously guys!"

[@LarrytheKing16]

They never said that.

[@LarrytheKing16]

@DefinitelyNotACultist No thank you. I'm being honest, they never said it.

[@justfassy1176]

I never had a foursome with the three bears while Goldy Locks was cooking meth inside a tent In the kitchen

[@LarrytheKing16]

@DefinitelyNotACultist Oh

[@retiredalt]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@ATLBaTmAn1]

So joe laughing at the end wasn't funny to anyone else but me lol

[@thetealemerald]

Was to me said 4 years later

[@kiratubhi9125]

It was pretty funny

[@lawliet2263]

So do i

[@ChaosX923]

Yea it was but it wasn't the highlight

[@transcendentblades]

yep ... just like kronk

[@maverickREAL]

"I never was named Joe." "DAMMIT" "Quagmire, what the hell did you do?" "Sometimes fetishes get out of hand."

[@TazMainian2015]

underrated

[@JessicaGodinez7]

😂😂😂😂

[@wockytalkie8352]

Who’s Joe😳

[@JayJ95X]

@@wockytalkie8352 Joe...........Mama

[@setsers1]

😆

[@Guntherson220]

Peter: I never cry read the Bible in a sex dungeon while a Dominatrix dripped candle wax on my nads. Quagmire thinking: Oh thank god he didn't say Dr. Seuss.

[@Thunderchild-gz4gc]

That's a good one

[@karenfan010]

peter: oh actually he’s reading a dr seuss book.

[@bryanegelhoffsanimationtec257]

@@karenfan010 Quagmire: MOTHER-!

[@smithsc654]

Total Lol!

[@XemnasO01X]

Did you get that from CinemaSins?

[@soulassassin0g]

Peter: "I've never had sex with a monster from Where The Wild Things Are." Quagmire: "Come on!" **Takes a drink**

[@AnnoyingNerdLoL]

Who else but Quagmire?

[@Shahzad-ss1jq]

Hii

[@bonedude1286]

Giggity-Giggity-Giggity!

[@stevenstice6683]

He's Quagmire. Quagmire. Never really know what he's gonna do next. He's Quagmire. Quagmire.

[@jordanwelch3832]

@@stevenstice6683Giggity Giggity Giggity Giggty let’s have sex!

[@jimbodeek]

"I never got my thing stuck in a window while watching Lois do martial arts."

[@TPDManiacXC626]

Quagmire: DAMMIT ARE YOU GUYS DOING THIS ON PURPOSE?! [takes a swig]

[@zachhaywood1564]

"Hello, 911? It's Quagmire. Yeah, it's in a window this time."

[@AppleOfThineEye]

@@zachhaywood1564 "*sigh*... Ground floor or upper floor?"

[@dionjaywoollaston1349]

@@AppleOfThineEye”both” “Damn it”

[@TheFrontLines955]

Joe: I never had sex for an entire year Quagmire: Oh finally

[@TheWindstorm2012]

I'm laughing my ass off outta Joe's giggles. Patrick Warburton is the best "Family Guy voice" actor after Seth.

[@WalshTV]

TheWindstorm2012 which seth

[@hidingcrocodile]

@@zombienation7493 wtf

[@LayneCobain]

I jer r ked off a Palestinian midg et until he gave me aids on my channel brotendo

[@bderrick4944]

I’d say Mike Henry was the second best until he got all woke

[@e-122psi3]

Okay but we know Adam West dominated prior to his death.

[@jays5428]

I never made the Kessel run in 12 parsecs

[@hellstrom4209]

Han Solo: Oh come on!

[@keith.gabrielson]

Jay S lolololol

[@Tevincozart19]

I never do the same old thing but with a animal from petsmart

[@frieza2235]

@@Tevincozart19 Oh god this is ridiculous 🙄

[@melonmuncher3812]

Impossible🤨

[@NightHawk12to81]

Quagmire on his 51st beer.

[@jasonarmstrong5750]

damn, he can drink more than Jim Lahey

[@curticcarmichael3580]

Did you actually count?

[@christartist1992]

Curtic Carmichael I did. Including the five bottles below the table.

[@connorsavage-goodship4835]

NightHawk12to81 now I've pressed the like button you now have 51 likes. 😉

[@Ibelikemj]

Wade Boggs couldn’t drink that much

[@dyea_b_tis5319]

Me: I never attempted a game of badminton at a nudist beach while reciting Bon Jovi’s “Runaway.” Quagmire: *passes out*

[@typacsk]

Inspector Clouseau: *(drinks)*

[@joshfactor1]

in all fairness, that is a pretty good song

[@whereschaos9521]

Peter: “I never banged a chick upside down under a bridge while an Arabic guy and a penguin moon walked across the top while reciting the emancipation proclamation” Quagmire: “oh my god come on!” *drinks

[@SoaringFox16]

I’m dead😂

[@isaywhateveriwantandyougot7421]

"I never saw myself being reincarnated as a condom that gets used for gay sex" Quagmire: Oh, come on!

[@314rft]

"Alllright!... NO NO NOT ALRIGHT!!!"

[@Mistressofthelostones]

​@@314rftwho said that

[@314rft]

@@Mistressofthelostones That was Quag's reaction when he was reincarnated as a condom, only for the camera to pan out and show 2 dudes.

[@MrBrando07]

"I've never talked a woman out of sex." Quagmire: Finally, someone wins!

[@JWesker1998]

"Only to talk them back into it afterwards."

[@SeBa-xb3jn]

​@@JWesker1998Quagmire:Dang it! *drinks*

[@eb7389]

Love how they'd never specified the things had to be strictly sexual. They could have changed argument at any time, but they just wanted to know how deep that rabbit hole went

[@dvj1216]

Me: "I never did all the female heroes from Marvel with Stan Lee watching..." Quagmire: "Oh give me a break!"

[@who-ny5oe]

I never did the same thing but with DC females heroes O god this is ridiculous

[@photonlink2947]

“This is ridiculous” *What’s ridiculous is the list of what you’ve done*

[@JDubs1464]

It’s so nice seeing them act like real pals, it’s not Cleveland being bullied, Joe acting depressed, Peter being annoying, and Quagmire going into sex withdrawal. It’s just 4 guys messing around with drinks

[@williamblue356]

Me: I never gave a rusty trombone to a hippopotamus while singing the soviet national anthem after sucking in helium. Quagmire: come on this is ridiculous!

[@Boobquake]

This comment *DESERVES* to be in Cards Against Humanity.

[@ScrewBallTheAlien]

I gotta ask, what’s a rusty trombone?

[@buzzytrombone4353]

Some stoned asshole: I uh....I never did the same thing, the other way around with Jenifer Aniston

[@buzzytrombone4353]

@@ScrewBallTheAlien Some sex toy the shape of a trombone

[@Rangerj04]

@@ScrewBallTheAlien when a guy gets a rimjob and a handjob the same time

[@fidzschool2941]

Peter: "Never have I done a Don Quixote with a pregnant Welsh chick while riding a horse" Quagmire: "Oh come on"

[@bushidotestu1997]

0:43 I love that side glance that Peter did cause he knew quagmire would drink to that

[@mickwoodfield9980]

I never flew to Canada to have a three way with female tigers on top of the CN Tower while saying the Declaration of Independence in every language while Bun jee Jumping. Quagmire: OH COME ON

[@ElPerverto6]

Joe: Where do you even FIND the time?!

[@NictayzzVA]

I've never played video games for 24 straight hours without passing out "Oh God."

[@Tevincozart19]

I never kissed a sexy girl from auto zone take home and play with me while I have some fun. Oh, come on!

[@buzzytrombone4353]

@@Tevincozart19 I never did the same thing, but with a retarded secretariat at my University hospital

[@jimbodeek]

@@buzzytrombone4353 "Dammit!"

[@JayTowers901]

48 hours. Noob 🙄

[@myang12003]

He wasted 24 hours of his life playing fortnite?

[@hudzj01]

Like how Quagmire did everything that they said

[@DontYouLookAtMe.]

Joy Boy, its almost as if the original comment was being sarcastic.

[@kstreet7438]

Kyle Thomas it wasn't.

[@michaelgualtieri651]

Who else but Quagmire?

[@lucywong6510]

such a good point

[@taraungoogle8482]

He's a sick man 😞 🤢

[@juhaniaho6698]

I never lost a game of "I never".

[@sdm47]

Juhani Aho *chugs the entire fucking bottle

[@ozziecomedian1786]

How do you win

[@retiredalt]

Kek

[@OverHeed]

Enters the twilight zone

[@jefelix2010]

Peter: I never did it to a chick at a pool while watching an interracial porn film and play volleyball. Quagmire: Oh god!

[@moneylover318]

I never rubbed a koala while having a blow job done by an aborigine medicine woman in a tent on the day titanic was released in theaters

[@sweetbabyrodney]

@@moneylover318 Quagmire: Are y'all doing this on purpose? (Drinks beer)

[@moneylover318]

@@sweetbabyrodney ok I never did the same thing but avatar was released

[@eatinganemone89]

Frederick LaFrance Quagmire: aw cmon! (drinks beer)

[@moneylover318]

@@eatinganemone89 alright I never shoved all 8 harry potter books in my anus while giving oral sex to whoopi goldberg

[@JackPool-lq8ux]

I admire the guys for never judging Quagmire and continuing the game.

[@TheDragonman104]

Peter: “I never had sex with Marge Simpson.” Quagmire: “Oh, come one! This is ridiculous!”

[@TheObliviousOne87]

WHAT?! HE ACTUALLY DID OR IS THIS A JOKE?

[@TheDragonman104]

@@TheObliviousOne87 He did! In one episode, Lois was talking to Brian about him moving in with Jillian. And during the conversation, the Simpsons bumper ad appears in the bottom of the screen and Quagmire chases after her. Then after the conversation ends, Quagmire and Marge appear back on screen where she was satisfied by Glen’s love-making. And it doesn’t end there, you really need to see the clip for yourself.

[@beardedgreek9069]

0:37 his face kills me every time. 😂😂😂

[@CyrusShameli]

Bro took too many shots

[@krisseth2000]

I never gave a reach around 😂

[@kyleschwartz2501]

“I never gave a Cleveland Steamer in the White House Oval Office, while singing the national anthem.” Quagmire: OH GOD!

[@nicholascarvajal]

for some reason, the transition from one beer to several of them from things Quagmire has done, the zooming out to see Quagmire’s face, and the fact that the scene then cuts to everyone just bored out of their minds , just never fails to make me laugh……

[@kingpen5866]

The fact that you said the fact that shows the fact that you didn’t really need to say the fact that

[@SixStringsOfHeart]

Someone should've said "I've never had sex with Lois".

[@neonghoul7849]

SixStringsOfHeart they'd all be lying XP

[@CyrusShameli]

Quagmire: OH COME ON!

[@masterproductions1179]

Bro did all the side quests

[@obdurated]

Love how I get a Jack Daniels as ad right after he passes out

[@blixtm4732]

Is it just me or is Joe’s giggles at the end wholesome af

[@traintrack3761]

I think it’s cute and funny LOL

[@justcommenting6791]

I never did a giraffe than sleeped the night with the giraffe only to realize that the giraffe beside me was not the same giraffe Quagmire: OH COME ON

[@gamesurvivor3129]

I've never laugh like the Mark Hamill joker himself while I was drunk

[@TPDManiacXC626]

Uh, Mark Hamill’s Joker? Jack Nicholson’s? Or Heath Ledger?

[@sweetbabyrodney]

Damn it!

[@JayTowers901]

I've been told.i laughed like all 3.

[@trentroberts6736]

@@JayTowers901 nice.

[@Panzrrr]

“I’ve never eaten a bologna sandwich off of a bears left testicle in the Wendy’s parking lot after watching Tommy Boy on repeat on a Saturday” “ Ah this is Ridiculous “

[@ericawalker7695]

WTF! LMFAO!

[@AaronSmith-kr5yf]

I never went elk hunting in Manitoba wearing a luke skywalker wig with a chick dressed up as princess leia so when we field dressed the elk we pretended it was a ton-ton to keep from freezing to death.

[@Rykyuby]

Peter: i never done it with a clown while riding a unicycle while bouncing on a trampoline Quagmire: oh come on.....

[@donvandamnjohnsonlongfella1239]

Rykyuby yeah some people just don't know how to have a good time.

[@alneri8327]

Haha

[@alneri8327]

@@donvandamnjohnsonlongfella1239 wait ✋ what

[@ReturnOfMoonwalk5000]

Me: I never touch myself in the movie theater while Scarlett Johansson changes in the car from Iron Man 2. Quagmire: Oh God!! This is ridiculous!! (drinks, then passes out)

[@JWesker1998]

Sounds like something Deadpool would also do.

[@NintendoNexus604]

Let's see... I never did a cheerleader in the ladies' restroom during a high-school basketball game. Quagmire: Oh come on, seriously!? *drinks*

[@donvandamnjohnsonlongfella1239]

Millennium Gamer yeah I'm pretty sad I never did that one. Might have been fun. Didn't really start knocking out the fucking bucket list until I was 28.

[@jimbodeek]

"Dear Diary, jackpot."

[@jovanyt6680]

" Ive never had sex with a dolphin before aboarding a boat " Quagmire, "oh Gaaad"

[@ariatcowboy7066]

i love how they are all looking at Quagmire to see if he drinks

[@kingpen5866]

I love how you made a basic observation

[@emmachavarria9361]

Fourth Season, 12th Episode: Perfect Castaway.

[@ssj99lucario]

Ideas: Peter: I never slept with my own mother Quagmire: Damn it. (Drinks) Cleveland: I never slept with my own father Quagmire: God Damn it (drinks) Joe: I never slept with my own father pre-operation Quagmire: Son of a Bitch (drinks) Peter: I never used a machine to clone myself, then proceed to have sex with the clone to see if it was real sex or masturbation Quagmire: You gotta be Kidding Me! (Drinks) Cleveland: I never got off to watching "Two Girls One Cup" without needing to touch myself Quagmire: for Fuck's sake (drinks) Joe: I never slept with Chris Quagmire: Fuck a Duck! (Drinks) Herbert: [in the distance] you son of a bitch

[@DgardsGaming]

actually he did sleep with his own father, when that one chick forced him. He did not enjoy it.

[@ssj99lucario]

@@DgardsGaming which is why he took a drink

[@User-BlithePlanedCyprian]

😂🤣🤣

[@ntinosaggelopoulos6718]

😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳

[@yeahmhmmrightokaymhmmyeahsure]

Joe's a fake friend for asking that question about Clevelands wife. 😂😂😂

[@fzerowipeoutlover]

Peter: "I never gave a chick a Dirty Sanchez while reciting the Magna Carta." Quagmire: "Oh come on!"

[@nyanbonecrush]

"I never played Guess Who while being pegged by a russian chick for every face I flip down." Quagmire: "Aww! You got to be kidding me!"

[@TPDManiacXC626]

Me: I never made love to black lady cashier who worked at a Woolworth’s in Tanzania? Quagmire: OH COME ON THIS IS JUST RIDICULOUS! ^He drinks*

[@moneylover318]

I never had sex with a man thinking he was a woman while Brian was a drug sniffing dog

[@familyguyearrape3978]

Do you work at Woolworths in tanzania

[@TPDManiacXC626]

familyguyearrape No, my family and I were on a safari vacation in Tanzania and we happened to find a Woolworth’s there.

[@familyguyearrape3978]

@@TPDManiacXC626 now that's interesting

[@sdmiii1102]

We all have that one friends who’s done just about everything

[@swordnboard677]

As that friend in the group, we stopped playing never have I ever, and now play scattergories instead. Otherwise I end up blacked out before anyone else

[@donvandamnjohnsonlongfella1239]

SDMIII: I never almost had sex with a burn victim well raping a pregnant woman and almost getting killed by another lovers crazy Vietnam Vet Marine father. Me: Ohhh come on!

[@silverloony1170]

I never had a four-way with identical triplets in an Olive Garden bathroom. Q - Oh come on!

[@jeremytung1632]

It was either this or the Loretta thing that marked the beginning of Quagmires metamorphosis from a legit ladies man to the stuff that sexual deviants have nightmares about.

[@theanalogkid3763]

I love the way Cleveland laughs. It’s so pure.

[@traintrack3761]

Oh boy he's out cold. Hey, let's write on him! XD

[@PercyandSailorMoonfan2002]

+Rylan The Blue Pony LOL! XD

[@traintrack3761]

+Paul Young 65 they wrote "Penus" and they spelled it wrong XD

[@PercyandSailorMoonfan2002]

Rylan The Blue Pony Then What Happened Next? XD

[@pottytheparrot310]

+Paul Young 65 There's fish everywhere

[@traintrack3761]

+Jalen Brito at Pelican's Reef

[@Hustlehology]

Quagmire is a legend among legends

[@kaidiekaidie1825]

This one is easy! "I have never slept with Peter's wife" Done! No more drinking for Quagmire

[@jamesgravil9162]

Well, there was that episode where Peter travelled back in time and changed history which led to Quagmire marrying Lois (and their children somehow all looked much the same except they had Quagmire's chin and mannerisms), but that probably doesn't count. It happened in a later season anyway. But that episode gave us this glorious line: Quagmire: "Hey Lois, I'm ready for your pie. And you made dessert! OH!!!"

[@jimbodeek]

@@jamesgravil9162 Of course, Quagmire wouldn't have remembered that because Peter created a new timeline, so...

[@conntoons_4848]

I don’t wanna believe Quagmire experienced all of those things.... but then again... he’s Quagmire...

[@314rft]

I mean he's the oldest of the group by far, beating the rest by at least 15 years.

[@jordanbrawley6222]

Makes you wonder what were quagmires i never questions

[@jmentone]

I can’t tell you the last time I saw a JoAnn Fabrics

[@shirleyjenlion187]

Peter: I never married and had sex with a giraffe, getting her pregnant Glenn: for God's sake!

[@Amsosorryscotty]

Peter: never have I ever slept with a one eye toad. Quagmire: AW COME ON! ( drinks) Joe: Peter this isn’t working. Peter: no! There has to be something that quagmire didn’t do. Um…never have I ever slept with a 4 arm muscle creature from that kids game. Quagmire: AW MAN!! REALLY?!?! ( drinks again) Peter: how did you…. Quagmire: excuse me for trying out new hobbies! Peter: ok…I give up…

[@aaronrobles6009]

I never had multiple affairs with wookies and ewoks Quagmire:Oh come on!

[@JGBsings]

Me: "I never took an eighteen-year-old home and found out she's my daughter." Quagmire: "Oh, come on!"

[@litafboii]

I never got caught in bed with a dinosaur by its significant other. quagmire: OH COME ON

[@mickwoodfield9980]

Well dinosaurs are extinct so that’s sorta impossible

[@mixatime5406]

"I've never gotten a hand job from a monkey in a Switzerland Nazi uniform while perfectly reciting the Egypyian National Anthem" Quagmire: OH come on

[@xxkittycatsxx4606]

😂😂😂😂

[@Kyleplaysgames567]

I'd pretty much win this game, since I haven't done anything with my life.

[@ImCerealSuperDuperCereal]

I haven't, haven't done anything with my life.

[@tpbfangirl]

Same lol

[@donvandamnjohnsonlongfella1239]

Kyle LOSER! L O S E ......R!

[@Hk-ox4bb]

Same

[@314rft]

Me too since I'm a virgin.

[@t-dogtyler3626]

"I've never known an animal who slept/had sex with a family member who's transgender." Quagmire: "OH FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!"

[@arbknight12]

The fact that Quagmire has done all those things just tells me he’s lived a rich full life.

[@Thunderchild-gz4gc]

And has every std from a to z

[@loganw1232]

Not sure about full life, more like depressing.

[@Funkadelic_Zach4579]

I feel like he cheated

[@Twocoolman115]

Rich and full might not be the right words. Eventful though, most definitely

[@kingpen5866]

The fact that you said the fact that shows the fact that you didn’t really need to say the fact that

[@buzzytrombone4353]

I never yanked one out in class the moment my teacher Jenifer Goldburg, wearing something from Victoria’s Secret bent down to tie her running shoes.

[@JWesker1998]

Oh God! *drinks*

[@jikihendrik4281]

"I've never gotten a rusty venture"

[@Son_Joe_Productions]

I never crashed a plane that was heading to Canada, then leaving my freiend in the forest, turning him into a wild human beast with no memory of himself.

[@JWesker1998]

SERIOUSLY?! *drinks*

[@cidredwood6170]

The fact it takes the man from what I counted 33 beers to pass out is pretty impressive

[@kingpen5866]

The fact you said the fact shows the fact that you didn’t really need to say the fact

[@unitds27-delta]

I never climbed out a window, climbed up a wall, and once I got to the roof, I screamed bloody murder while it was hailing (and the hail was as big as golf balls) only for a chunk of hail to fall in my screaming mouth. Quagmire: OH COME ON

[@ElPerverto6]

Cleveland: Is there some context I'm missing? Quagmire: Ecstacy is a helluva drug. That's all I have to say about it.

[@michaelhuynh4953]

Quagmire has lived quite the life so far.

[@therjschannel904]

Let’s see uh- I never binge watched Two-Sentence Horror Stories on Netflix, while plowing my pillow

[@thehughes7189]

Quagmire: OH COME ON

[@zar1536]

@@thehughes7189 uh, I never did the same thing but with a blanket.

[@shawnngnosse2070]

⁠@@zar1536Quagmire: OH GOD THIS IS RIDICULOUS🤦🏿‍♂️

[@-throat-]

Quagmire has done every single thing in the known universe

[@alcaldealer8515]

The man is on his 51st beer, they all got their 1st still lol 😂

[@Terlinilia]

Quamgire saying "Oh come on, this is RIDICULOUS!" as if it's not his fault

[@joebenoit8005]

never did i ever do someone while watching 50 shades of grey on full volume quagmire: "oh come on"

[@briarmason8737]

I never fisted a Blockbuster employee while choking myself with a garden hose with War of the Worlds playing in the background. Quagmire: OH GOD! *(drinks)*

[@xxkittycatsxx4606]

😂😂😂

[@mpa1931]

I feel like Joe was trolling Quagmire with the Cleveland's wife remark,

[@ninjamaica4205]

I like how Cleveland says 'provide the free beer ' but Quagmire drank most of it lol

[@MinscFromBaldursGate92]

You had it coming Quagmire.

[@YhwachTheAlmighty.]

“I’ve never slept with a gold digger who is from hell, and got god’s permission to set her free while also getting McDonald’s and tipping 1cent in the donation box, without any clothes on” “Oh come on”

[@danielbautista9062]

Hm.. I never banged a chick in theatres, while watching the film Mad Max Fury Road and yelled Witness me! Quagmire: OH COME ON!! [drinks]

[@nassimkalai7274]

pov: quagmire does EVERYTHING

[@Sigma_Eight]

Do you even know what POV means or are you just parroting tick tock lol

[@nassimkalai7274]

@@Sigma_Eight bro it's a joke, i already know that POV = "point of view" and all but Jesus dude chill

[@windpunkYT]

Who else but quagmire?

[@nassimkalai7274]

@@windpunkYT the only person other than quagmire is quagmire of course

[@discomug]

Did he really just drank 55 beers?

[@gabe_s_videos]

Aw, you left out my favorite part: when he wakes up the next morning with "Penus" written on his face. XD

[@LarrytheKing16]

0:41 Peter: I never gave a reach around to a spider monkey while reciting the Pledge of Allegiance. 0:46 Quagmire: Oh god. (drinks his beer)